Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Pushka · Pushka

I grew up being told I didn't feel one way or the other in specific situations. My grandpa died I wasn't allowed to be sad. This was my perception of the situation as a kid, I was stuttered in how I grieved (My mother and grandma fell apart, there was no place for me TO fall apart in my minds eye). I wasn't a...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'm just trying to get this message posted before I leave for work. I could use a little feedback. My boss has helped me to assist a team member. Although I don't work directly for him, and do work directly for her; he is management. He and I had a meeting yesterday and most of the hour was spent listeni...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I have been feeling compelled to talk to my AH about my trust issues with him. He quit drinking after the DUI in February. We have had no intimacy in our marriage since then because I just plain old don't want to do 'it' with someone I don't trust yet. He hasn't approached me about the subject. He is so wrapp...

tanyanubin · tanyanubin

My family is so toxic...it's just so painful sometimes. My husband and I are both celebrating 30 years sober this year. However, I have lost 2 brothers to alcohol, and I have an older sister who is newly out of jail and in a homeless shelter in New England. Writing this stuns me. I simply can't believe it h...

Mom_of_ 3 · Mom_of_ 3

I am new here. Sorry for starting right out the gate with this but need advice fast. My parents are coming down for a five day visit and I found out last night my Dad decided he could drink once a week and he will be OK. My family has hit pre-deployment mode (military family) and I really do not want to have to...

Hope For Change · Hope For Change

Christmas before last....Christmas day....driving to Nanna's house with our SIX...children....I stayed home sick. Texts from 3 older kids. "SOMETHING" wrong with Daddy. He can't stay awake. Acting funny. Something wrong. When I realized..."HOW" bad. Ambien. Mixe...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I live in a rented 2 bedroom house on Lake Michigan way out in the woods with only 2 neighbors that I can see through the trees. I have a great yard, private beach and well it is beautiful and serene way out here. It was the best place I could have found while seperating and later divorcing my AH. It has priva...

Grace7 · Grace7

Sign up below for the date and time you can and will OP. Thank You ahead of time!!! You Are Appreciated for this!!! Saturday May 5 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ Sunday May 6 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ 7 PM Easter...

pineapple · pineapple

As mentioned in my previous post my A went over a week without drinking. It was not by choice, it was because he lost his wallet and ATM card. He had no money and I wouldn't give him any. He was starting to look better and he said he felt better. I was hopeful that this might be a new beginning for him. Silly me....

Tracy · Tracy

My exabf has been drinking for about ten weeks and we seperated. He has been really ill. I made the mistake of getting intimate with him about a week ago after a girls night out. He has now gone back to AA so he says and wants to talk. I do not want to talk I told him I made a mistake and apologised for sending...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

I was viewing Oprah's most recent Life Class that is streamed online. One of her guests was Iyanla Vanzant. She said that there are two ways to tell your story. One keeps you in a rut, while the other one gets you into the flow of life. Rut Story: I loved Booboo (her word, not mine) I gave Booboo my all And...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

My AH is flying back to MD today for his dad's funeral. My son and I are joining him tomorrow. AH had his license suspended for the month of May but hasn't gotten the notice from the DMV yet. He is going to rent a car in MD and I don't think he's going to have any problems because he's with the corporate plan...

Pushka · Pushka

I have to say I have 3 situations that are looming at the moment where I am unsure where to go. I have given it to God (HP) and am trying to keep my hands out of them. 1 situation I'm going to let go of .. I know that God's timing may not be mine however it also means that things will be arranged the way I need them...

I am lost · I am lost

ok, so this is only my third time posting on here, I just don't know what else to do!! last night my a/h was drinking of course and he always wants to "talk" when he is drinking. he first started with our finances, then it was how he feels my mother has a negative inpact on our relationship (so not...

Fina · Fina

Recovery Meditations ~ Birthright ~ One Day at a Time ~ April 23, 2012:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~RECOVERY MEDITATIONSOne Day at a TimeApril 23, 2012~ BIRTHRIGHT ~:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~I've continued to recognize the power individuals have to change vir...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

I went for a hike yesterday. 6 miles roundtrip on a mountain. It was a beautiful day but as I progressed up the mountain, fog blew in and clouded any view. The effect was surreal, but perfectly suited my place in time. I'm in that murky middle space in between the worlds of the past and the future. I do...

Jozie · Jozie

Hello All... been a Long Time... I am Still Survivin this Crazy World & Sometimes even have moments I Feel like I "Strivin", So I Suppose I am On the Correct Road Currently... I Still make my Meetings as Often as I can, Hope to make one tonight ;) Yea know Going to the my F2F Meetings & Se...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I need some well wishes, good thoughts and prayers for any who will offer them! I am going to a job interview and to look at 2 apartments. This move is 1 month away and I am just shocked I am taking my girls and I to a new town with nobody there that I know and I am staying in motion and feeling hopeful about it. Wh...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Ah's father passed away today at the wonderful old age of 89. Some of you may remember that my father passed away about 4.5 months ago, at the age of 62. We may all be going across the country for the funeral. I'm not sure how my son will handle this as his anxiety and stress levels really went through the...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

One of the most infuriating aspects of my marriage was that my AH assumes my intentions, thoughts, and feelings. He's also a Narcissist, and I'm sure a lot of this assuming is actually projection of his own thoughts. Sometimes, it feels like a manipulation, that I am supposed to jump in and correct h...

Debilyn · Debilyn

just sharing btw son sent me a message. We are now communicating.

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Life holds so much--so much to be happy about always. Most people ask for happiness on condition. Happiness can be felt only if you don't set conditions. -Artur Rubinstein That last sentence is very very powerful...

Tigger · Tigger

Being heard is incredibly important to me. I hate being misunderstood or disregarded when I try to express myself. I used a different tack today with my partner and feel I made some progress. I have been recognising the things I do that block my chances of being heard and taken seriously. For example my...

Tracey C · Tracey C

Disappointments all round again. When will it all stop? I guess when I choose to put myself first. Tracey

Oksie · Oksie

Hi everyone I have been back for about a week. I haven't been on here as much as I was before I went away. I have spent quite a bit of time here today though. Since coming back from holidays.. I have felt a little tense for some reason. I guess I am waiting for him to go back to using after being 'good' while we...

silent · silent

its now been 9 days no contact with my a/d ex b/f he is still on my face book and we both was just on at the same time i wanted ,oh how i wanted to say something to him or him say something to me or just send me something but no not nothing i posted things and he posted a country song video ,i finally thought it best j...

Temple · Temple

That is a quote from A Course in Miracles. This helps me so much when I'm fuming, frustrated, depressed. Makes me take a step back. Sometimes I am upset with myself for having been lax and letting a situation develop that could have been prevented. Sometimes it is displaced anger--it would be too sc...

amills4294 · amills4294

Boy it was fun and it went well! We have a fairly well structured group so it was fairly easy to do. I picked boundaries as my topic and did some readings from Hope for Today. Lots of great shares. It was nice to feel like I did a good job. It was nice to be in a roomfull of non judgemental people. Right befo...

Oksie · Oksie

One year ago...approximately.. I attended the office of a psychologist in tears, ready to kill myself and not knowing how my life had disintegrated to the point it was at. I thought I had it 'sorted'. Great husband, great life. Then... my husband relapsed into pot use/drug addiction. We were married...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

Hey everyone. Hope you are all doing well. I spent my birthday and whole weekend in bed with a horrible flu and sinus infection that didn't help me too much because I didn't get to any meetings. I really needed them. It just gave me time to sit and think...and my thoughts hurt. I keep going to pick up my phon...

Pushka · Pushka

The train wreck is coming in ways that boggle the mind. I knew he was sick, I get that he's sick .. I just didn't realize how sick until two and two got put together. It's not that I didn't see it or get it .. what I get now is how fast the train is coming. I have the same feeling I had a few months before the DUI....

Nutbrownhare · Nutbrownhare

Has anyone else had this problem, and if so, how did you deal with it? Briefly, I'd been in a long-distance relationship with my partner, decided to move the 200 miles to join him... and then the relationship really started going downhill. Basically I'd walked into a situation with a heavy drinker wi...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. See I know it. I also know how to do it. I have a loving, caring wife who doesn't refrain from giving me suggestions about self care. A couple of weeks ago I blinded myself in my right eye. I wasn't wearing safety glass...

Fina · Fina

Recovery Meditations ~ Unity ~ One Day At A Time ~ April 28, 2012 :~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~: RECOVERY MEDITATIONS One Day at a Time April 28, 2012 ~ UNITY ~ :~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~: Separate reeds are weak and easily broken; but bound together they are str...

Debilyn · Debilyn

For over 4 months now my son has not contacted me. We were as always ok and close. Then some dumb thing happened and he got upset as he thought I didn't see how upset he was. I just said no worries I will take care of it. That made him mad as he thought I was putting him down for being upset. It was over something i...

leel · leel

well...I started going to alanon a couple of months ago..real meetings... I found out I was pregnant,and stopped my own social drinking.I found out that my boyfriend cant stop his evening stress relief...drinking until he passes out... And it brought up the memories of my childhood,and the drinki...

callmemara · callmemara

Lately my husband has been an every other day drinker. On the days he doesn't drink, everything is supposed to be "normal" and if I'm "cold" or "standoffish" because I am resentful because i remember everything that happened yesterday not to mention the money he wa...

azlady604 · azlady604

I left my AH 3 years ago after 10+ years of confusion, anger and a broken heart. I knew nothing of alcoholism except that I couldn't be a part of it anymore. I found this message board the first week after moving into my new place and cannot even attempt to come close to expressing the gratitude and warmt...

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

Here I'm again feeling like I'm going under, Just earlier this week I was feeling good about saing "no" to my daughter. Well this 45 y.o. women has me feeling guilty and sad. She called this morning asking if I could bring her some food to last until the 1st. she is hungry. I told her they we...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

I am proud of my week. On several occasions when I had some clients who were very upset I sat quietly with them, talked minimally, expressed love through words and gesture, and prayed. Of course, I don't tell them I'm praying since we are not allowed to talk about prayer where I work. But I did pray. I p...

cerika111 · cerika111

Well, I'm back to Alanon - should have stayed in... Famous last words! My aso of 17 years and I had a great group in Houston, but I was transferred to Dallas 3 years ago. We still have many of our friends from the rooms there (AA, NA, AFG), but I am rarely there due to travel. Anyhow my then 17 yo daughter left...

Aloha · Aloha

I had a great experience the other day to see how Al-Anon has helped me to change in so many ways. I was talking with a friend who was going through a nerve-racking experience where he told me he'd been seeing someone and she had called him and told him her period was late. He had a lot of fear going on with tha...

Pushka · Pushka

Say what you mean, mean what you say; don't say it mean, don't expect different behavior. Someone shared this at meeting today and BOY did I like that big time!! Anyway, just wanted to share that and say thanks. Hugs P :)

callmemara · callmemara

Other times he goes in cycles where he "realizes" how wrong he is to drink like he does, and talks about how he's going to change. And I believe that he means it when he says it, but I know the cycle. I know that it's only a matter of time, usually days, sometimes a week, before he's at it again. How...

pinkchip · pinkchip

I know there are "double winners" on this site, but in responding to other people and their threads, I keep feeling different for several reasons. Mostly, I think it's because I was just as big a drunk as my qualifier and then actually worse towards the end. My reaction to his drinking and...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I thought maybe I'd share a bit about myself, my history with alcohol, and how I got where I am today. Some of you may be able to relate while some may see nothing in common with me at all, but either way I felt it was cathartic for me to put it all down! I grew up in a family where drinking was pretty moderate,...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

I've gone to a number of AA meetings with my husband, who has been in recovery for the past 11 months. I noticed a significant difference between most members of AA and those who attend Al-Anon meetings. Many AA members, who have had some recovery time, joke about their past behaviors due to alcohol. H...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

I've found lately that I'm really becoming more and more comfortable with the concept of alcoholism as a disease. Not that I have ever really had a problem with this idea, but it's just that lately I've been able to really embrace this concept and allow it to help me find the sympathy and understanding t...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t48923608/step-12-alanon/-- Edited by hotrod on Saturday 28th of April 2012 08:20:22 AM

alexmaui · alexmaui

I keep writing this and then erasing it because I don't want to say what I'm seeing in my AH....After a month of sobriety and some sweet time together...he is floating away on a river of drugs and vodka, again. I moved out of our home 2 years ago- with a boundary of not seeing him when he is drinking. But wow c...

silent · silent

my instant message my a/d b/f boss and told him that i had all the rest of his clothes packed up and put in bags for him to get,in a nice kind way and his boss repied back with that to p[ut them outside on the porch and he would come and get them and he had to also add that me and my a/d bf did not ned to contact each ot...

hummingbirdkerry · hummingbirdkerry

My AH was sober for 75 days after 2 years of binge drinking on days off. Not that great, but the best two and a half months of our marriage. He got drunk just over a week ago, and of course I was sick and hurt about it, but I figured one time in that long wasn't a big deal. Today, I worked and came home to him drunk a...

julesredgirl · julesredgirl

So I seem to always post on here when I can't call anyone or go to a meeting. Its late so I can't call anyone and I am having an urgent moment. My "dry" bf is working tonight (at the bar) and I am down the street from his house hanging with some friends and planned on staying at his place tonight cu...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Hi all...I'm facing a situation this weekend, and I'm trying to decide how to handle it (and examine my motives as I choose the best course of action). My AH is in a bowling league at work. Usually bowling is after work on Wednesdays. Since he works second shift, this means bowling goes from 11 pm to 1 am...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

A couple of gentle tests this week. My in laws emailed. They are in the area for a work thing (they live on the East Coast, I am on the West Coast) and said they picked up a suitcase from my AH that I had borrowed and found a piece of jewelry in it...wanted to know if it was mine, where to send it, etc. The old me...

julesredgirl · julesredgirl

So I seem to always post on here when I can't call anyone or go to a meeting. Its late so I can't call anyone and I am having an urgent moment. My "dry" bf is working tonight (at the bar) and I am down the street from his house hanging with some friends and planned on staying at his place tonight cu...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

My AH has been smoking a pipe lately, usually every morning while he's drinking coffee. He works from home and his office right now reeks of tobacco. I can't stand to walk down that hallway, and his office is right across the hall from my son's room. Anyway, he threw out his stinky pipe cleaners in the...

hummingbirdkerry · hummingbirdkerry

My whole family knows about my AH, but I don't keep them updated on each "incident." Now that my AH has messed up a few times again, I don't want to say anything because I'm hoping he'll get back up on his feet. At the same time, I don't want to lie to my family and close friends by saying that ever...

missingit · missingit

7 months ago i started dating someone who was 5 years sober, or so I thought. We went away for new years eve and he had a few drinks and said it was ok to have a few every now and then. Well 4 months later he went to rehab because he didnt want to end up "out of control". Since rehab he has been ve...

pineapple · pineapple

It's been over a week since my A has had a drink. Not by choice. He lost his wallet last week with his ATM card in it. This is the third time in a year and a half. He's twice asked me for money and I've refused to give him any. The past few days he's beginning to look better. He was barely eating for months but he se...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Invalidating feelings? (Preview) I grew up being told I didn't feel one way or the other in specific situations. My grandpa died I wasn't allowed to be sad. This was my perception of the situation as a kid, I was stuttered in how I grieved (My mother and grandma fell apart, there was no place for me TO fall apart in my minds eye). I wasn't a...	Pushka	15	901	May 5, 2012 by sookie
	Gossipy Supervisor (Preview) I'm just trying to get this message posted before I leave for work. I could use a little feedback. My boss has helped me to assist a team member. Although I don't work directly for him, and do work directly for her; he is management. He and I had a meeting yesterday and most of the hour was spent listeni...	tiredtonite	7	559	May 5, 2012 by tiredtonite
	Talking to my A about trust? (Preview) I have been feeling compelled to talk to my AH about my trust issues with him. He quit drinking after the DUI in February. We have had no intimacy in our marriage since then because I just plain old don't want to do 'it' with someone I don't trust yet. He hasn't approached me about the subject. He is so wrapp...	ilovedogs	9	698	May 5, 2012 by sookie
	New here...upset today (Preview) My family is so toxic...it's just so painful sometimes. My husband and I are both celebrating 30 years sober this year. However, I have lost 2 brothers to alcohol, and I have an older sister who is newly out of jail and in a homeless shelter in New England. Writing this stuns me. I simply can't believe it h...	tanyanubin	10	504	May 5, 2012 by Oksie
	My Dad had a drink (Preview) I am new here. Sorry for starting right out the gate with this but need advice fast. My parents are coming down for a five day visit and I found out last night my Dad decided he could drink once a week and he will be OK. My family has hit pre-deployment mode (military family) and I really do not want to have to...	Mom_of_ 3	6	550	May 4, 2012 by orchidlover
	Setting boundaries.... (Preview) Christmas before last....Christmas day....driving to Nanna's house with our SIX...children....I stayed home sick. Texts from 3 older kids. "SOMETHING" wrong with Daddy. He can't stay awake. Acting funny. Something wrong. When I realized..."HOW" bad. Ambien. Mixe...	Hope For Change	7	534	May 4, 2012 by canadianguy
	Fear is taking over, is it just cold feet???? (Preview) I live in a rented 2 bedroom house on Lake Michigan way out in the woods with only 2 neighbors that I can see through the trees. I have a great yard, private beach and well it is beautiful and serene way out here. It was the best place I could have found while seperating and later divorcing my AH. It has priva...	Breakingfree	8	598	May 4, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Sign Up for OP's for Weekend Meetings 9AM Eastern Sat/Sun and 7PM Eastern Sun (Preview) Sign up below for the date and time you can and will OP. Thank You ahead of time!!! You Are Appreciated for this!!! Saturday May 5 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ Sunday May 6 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ 7 PM Easter...	Grace7	0	378	May 4, 2012 by Grace7
	So much for hope (Preview) As mentioned in my previous post my A went over a week without drinking. It was not by choice, it was because he lost his wallet and ATM card. He had no money and I wouldn't give him any. He was starting to look better and he said he felt better. I was hopeful that this might be a new beginning for him. Silly me....	pineapple	10	1358	May 4, 2012 by Debilyn
	al anon strength (Preview) My exabf has been drinking for about ten weeks and we seperated. He has been really ill. I made the mistake of getting intimate with him about a week ago after a girls night out. He has now gone back to AA so he says and wants to talk. I do not want to talk I told him I made a mistake and apologised for sending...	Tracy	7	473	May 3, 2012 by hotrod
	2 Ways to Tell Your Story (Preview) I was viewing Oprah's most recent Life Class that is streamed online. One of her guests was Iyanla Vanzant. She said that there are two ways to tell your story. One keeps you in a rut, while the other one gets you into the flow of life. Rut Story: I loved Booboo (her word, not mine) I gave Booboo my all And...	GailMichelle	9	1937	May 3, 2012 by orchidlover
	What would you do? (Preview) My AH is flying back to MD today for his dad's funeral. My son and I are joining him tomorrow. AH had his license suspended for the month of May but hasn't gotten the notice from the DMV yet. He is going to rent a car in MD and I don't think he's going to have any problems because he's with the corporate plan...	ilovedogs	10	729	May 3, 2012 by Highlyfavored
	God's Timing (Preview) I have to say I have 3 situations that are looming at the moment where I am unsure where to go. I have given it to God (HP) and am trying to keep my hands out of them. 1 situation I'm going to let go of .. I know that God's timing may not be mine however it also means that things will be arranged the way I need them...	Pushka	8	519	May 3, 2012 by Breakingfree
	bad night (Preview) ok, so this is only my third time posting on here, I just don't know what else to do!! last night my a/h was drinking of course and he always wants to "talk" when he is drinking. he first started with our finances, then it was how he feels my mother has a negative inpact on our relationship (so not...	I am lost	9	787	May 3, 2012 by surfgirl123
	1, 2, 3 read me . . . (Preview) *Recovery Meditations ~ Birthright ~ One Day at a Time ~ April 23, 2012:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~RECOVERY MEDITATIONSOne Day at a TimeApril 23, 2012~ BIRTHRIGHT ~:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~I've continued to recognize the power individuals have to change* vir...	Fina	4	402	May 3, 2012 by Michelle814
	Hiking with HP (Preview) I went for a hike yesterday. 6 miles roundtrip on a mountain. It was a beautiful day but as I progressed up the mountain, fog blew in and clouded any view. The effect was surreal, but perfectly suited my place in time. I'm in that murky middle space in between the worlds of the past and the future. I do...	Dolly Llama	6	532	May 3, 2012 by Oksie
	Just Poppin In... (Preview) Hello All... been a Long Time... I am Still Survivin this Crazy World & Sometimes even have moments I Feel like I "Strivin", So I Suppose I am On the Correct Road Currently... I Still make my Meetings as Often as I can, Hope to make one tonight ;) Yea know Going to the my F2F Meetings & Se...	Jozie	2	443	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	Going to the big city today and scared (Preview) I need some well wishes, good thoughts and prayers for any who will offer them! I am going to a job interview and to look at 2 apartments. This move is 1 month away and I am just shocked I am taking my girls and I to a new town with nobody there that I know and I am staying in motion and feeling hopeful about it. Wh...	Breakingfree	14	733	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	AH's father passed away today (Preview) Ah's father passed away today at the wonderful old age of 89. Some of you may remember that my father passed away about 4.5 months ago, at the age of 62. We may all be going across the country for the funeral. I'm not sure how my son will handle this as his anxiety and stress levels really went through the...	ilovedogs	10	879	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	AH's Assumptions, in-laws, and progress (Preview) One of the most infuriating aspects of my marriage was that my AH assumes my intentions, thoughts, and feelings. He's also a Narcissist, and I'm sure a lot of this assuming is actually projection of his own thoughts. Sometimes, it feels like a manipulation, that I am supposed to jump in and correct h...	Dolly Llama	4	432	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	Did you know this came from him? (Preview) just sharing btw son sent me a message. We are now communicating.	Debilyn	5	509	May 2, 2012 by debbiems
	Quote in Today's Reminder, Courage to Change--A good one! (Preview) Life holds so much--so much to be happy about always. Most people ask for happiness on condition. Happiness can be felt only if you don't set conditions. -Artur Rubinstein That last sentence is very very powerful...	usedtobeanyer	7	1150	May 2, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Being heard (Preview) Being heard is incredibly important to me. I hate being misunderstood or disregarded when I try to express myself. I used a different tack today with my partner and feel I made some progress. I have been recognising the things I do that block my chances of being heard and taken seriously. For example my...	Tigger	5	395	May 2, 2012 by Oksie
	Disappointments (Preview) Disappointments all round again. When will it all stop? I guess when I choose to put myself first. Tracey	Tracey C	6	576	May 1, 2012 by Oksie
	thanks (Preview) Hi everyone I have been back for about a week. I haven't been on here as much as I was before I went away. I have spent quite a bit of time here today though. Since coming back from holidays.. I have felt a little tense for some reason. I guess I am waiting for him to go back to using after being 'good' while we...	Oksie	4	266	May 1, 2012 by Oksie
	it soo does hurt in alot of ways (Preview) its now been 9 days no contact with my a/d ex b/f he is still on my face book and we both was just on at the same time i wanted ,oh how i wanted to say something to him or him say something to me or just send me something but no not nothing i posted things and he posted a country song video ,i finally thought it best j...	silent	5	507	May 1, 2012 by Aloha
	I am never upset for the reason I think I am. (Preview) That is a quote from A Course in Miracles. This helps me so much when I'm fuming, frustrated, depressed. Makes me take a step back. Sometimes I am upset with myself for having been lax and letting a situation develop that could have been prevented. Sometimes it is displaced anger--it would be too sc...	Temple	8	515	May 1, 2012 by Catriona
	lead my first F2F meeting.... and.... dealing with unacceptable behavior (Preview) Boy it was fun and it went well! We have a fairly well structured group so it was fairly easy to do. I picked boundaries as my topic and did some readings from Hope for Today. Lots of great shares. It was nice to feel like I did a good job. It was nice to be in a roomfull of non judgemental people. Right befo...	amills4294	4	468	May 1, 2012 by amills4294
	me - one year on (Preview) One year ago...approximately.. I attended the office of a psychologist in tears, ready to kill myself and not knowing how my life had disintegrated to the point it was at. I thought I had it 'sorted'. Great husband, great life. Then... my husband relapsed into pot use/drug addiction. We were married...	Oksie	8	508	May 1, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Thoughts (Preview) Hey everyone. Hope you are all doing well. I spent my birthday and whole weekend in bed with a horrible flu and sinus infection that didn't help me too much because I didn't get to any meetings. I really needed them. It just gave me time to sit and think...and my thoughts hurt. I keep going to pick up my phon...	Corgi2	6	497	May 1, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Seeing the Train wreck (Preview) The train wreck is coming in ways that boggle the mind. I knew he was sick, I get that he's sick .. I just didn't realize how sick until two and two got put together. It's not that I didn't see it or get it .. what I get now is how fast the train is coming. I have the same feeling I had a few months before the DUI....	Pushka	9	598	May 1, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Relationship with drinker's over, but I still feel afraid... (Preview) Has anyone else had this problem, and if so, how did you deal with it? Briefly, I'd been in a long-distance relationship with my partner, decided to move the 200 miles to join him... and then the relationship really started going downhill. Basically I'd walked into a situation with a heavy drinker wi...	Nutbrownhare	7	552	May 1, 2012 by Dolly Llama
	The 10th step... (Preview) Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. See I know it. I also know how to do it. I have a loving, caring wife who doesn't refrain from giving me suggestions about self care. A couple of weeks ago I blinded myself in my right eye. I wasn't wearing safety glass...	Jerry F	10	1025	May 1, 2012 by orchidlover
	UNITY (Preview) Recovery Meditations ~ Unity ~ One Day At A Time ~ April 28, 2012 *:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:* RECOVERY MEDITATIONS One Day at a Time April 28, 2012 ~ UNITY ~ *:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:* Separate reeds are weak and easily broken; but bound together they are str...	Fina	2	324	Apr 30, 2012 by Fina
	Someone must relate? (Preview) For over 4 months now my son has not contacted me. We were as always ok and close. Then some dumb thing happened and he got upset as he thought I didn't see how upset he was. I just said no worries I will take care of it. That made him mad as he thought I was putting him down for being upset. It was over something i...	Debilyn	7	520	Apr 30, 2012 by Debilyn
	new to alanon online...need help (Preview) well...I started going to alanon a couple of months ago..real meetings... I found out I was pregnant,and stopped my own social drinking.I found out that my boyfriend cant stop his evening stress relief...drinking until he passes out... And it brought up the memories of my childhood,and the drinki...	leel	9	499	Apr 30, 2012 by leel
	How to tame your resentful feelings (Preview) Lately my husband has been an every other day drinker. On the days he doesn't drink, everything is supposed to be "normal" and if I'm "cold" or "standoffish" because I am resentful because i remember everything that happened yesterday not to mention the money he wa...	callmemara	5	645	Apr 30, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Finally posting!! New and Excited!!! (Preview) I left my AH 3 years ago after 10+ years of confusion, anger and a broken heart. I knew nothing of alcoholism except that I couldn't be a part of it anymore. I found this message board the first week after moving into my new place and cannot even attempt to come close to expressing the gratitude and warmt...	azlady604	6	766	Apr 30, 2012 by Breakingfree
	This is so hard to do!!! I need help/support! (Preview) Here I'm again feeling like I'm going under, Just earlier this week I was feeling good about saing "no" to my daughter. Well this 45 y.o. women has me feeling guilty and sad. She called this morning asking if I could bring her some food to last until the 1st. she is hungry. I told her they we...	Highlyfavored	5	581	Apr 30, 2012 by Breakingfree
	FAITH! (Preview) I am proud of my week. On several occasions when I had some clients who were very upset I sat quietly with them, talked minimally, expressed love through words and gesture, and prayed. Of course, I don't tell them I'm praying since we are not allowed to talk about prayer where I work. But I did pray. I p...	Michelle814	5	611	Apr 30, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Back to Alanon - new city - both sig other and daughter (Preview) Well, I'm back to Alanon - should have stayed in... Famous last words! My aso of 17 years and I had a great group in Houston, but I was transferred to Dallas 3 years ago. We still have many of our friends from the rooms there (AA, NA, AFG), but I am rarely there due to travel. Anyhow my then 17 yo daughter left...	cerika111	2	367	Apr 30, 2012 by hotrod
	Al-Anon's helping me learn to be a better friend. (Preview) I had a great experience the other day to see how Al-Anon has helped me to change in so many ways. I was talking with a friend who was going through a nerve-racking experience where he told me he'd been seeing someone and she had called him and told him her period was late. He had a lot of fear going on with tha...	Aloha	5	721	Apr 30, 2012 by hotrod
	Expanded Slogan .. (Preview) Say what you mean, mean what you say; don't say it mean, don't expect different behavior. Someone shared this at meeting today and BOY did I like that big time!! Anyway, just wanted to share that and say thanks. Hugs P :)	Pushka	5	318	Apr 30, 2012 by hotrod
	How to be supportive when you know the cycle will continue? (Preview) Other times he goes in cycles where he "realizes" how wrong he is to drink like he does, and talks about how he's going to change. And I believe that he means it when he says it, but I know the cycle. I know that it's only a matter of time, usually days, sometimes a week, before he's at it again. How...	callmemara	10	625	Apr 29, 2012 by azlady604
	Double drunk trainwreck (Preview) I know there are "double winners" on this site, but in responding to other people and their threads, I keep feeling different for several reasons. Mostly, I think it's because I was just as big a drunk as my qualifier and then actually worse towards the end. My reaction to his drinking and...	pinkchip	9	672	Apr 29, 2012 by likemyheart
	My story, my past, and alcohol (Preview) I thought maybe I'd share a bit about myself, my history with alcohol, and how I got where I am today. Some of you may be able to relate while some may see nothing in common with me at all, but either way I felt it was cathartic for me to put it all down! I grew up in a family where drinking was pretty moderate,...	ilovedogs	5	522	Apr 29, 2012 by pinkchip
	What I've Observed Many Times (Preview) I've gone to a number of AA meetings with my husband, who has been in recovery for the past 11 months. I noticed a significant difference between most members of AA and those who attend Al-Anon meetings. Many AA members, who have had some recovery time, joke about their past behaviors due to alcohol. H...	GailMichelle	14	877	Apr 29, 2012 by Pushka
	We'd all be alcoholics if we had this disease (Preview) I've found lately that I'm really becoming more and more comfortable with the concept of alcoholism as a disease. Not that I have ever really had a problem with this idea, but it's just that lately I've been able to really embrace this concept and allow it to help me find the sympathy and understanding t...	usedtobeanyer	11	615	Apr 29, 2012 by callmemara
	12th Step (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t48923608/step-12-alanon/-- Edited by hotrod on Saturday 28th of April 2012 08:20:22 AM	hotrod	1	348	Apr 29, 2012 by Breakingfree
	back on the roller coaster (Preview) I keep writing this and then erasing it because I don't want to say what I'm seeing in my AH....After a month of sobriety and some sweet time together...he is floating away on a river of drugs and vodka, again. I moved out of our home 2 years ago- with a boundary of not seeing him when he is drinking. But wow c...	alexmaui	7	782	Apr 29, 2012 by maryjane
	hurt,and feeling alone (Preview) my instant message my a/d b/f boss and told him that i had all the rest of his clothes packed up and put in bags for him to get,in a nice kind way and his boss repied back with that to p[ut them outside on the porch and he would come and get them and he had to also add that me and my a/d bf did not ned to contact each ot...	silent	3	416	Apr 29, 2012 by maryjane
	SO frustrated, but it feels like a waste of tears. (Preview) My AH was sober for 75 days after 2 years of binge drinking on days off. Not that great, but the best two and a half months of our marriage. He got drunk just over a week ago, and of course I was sick and hurt about it, but I figured one time in that long wasn't a big deal. Today, I worked and came home to him drunk a...	hummingbirdkerry	8	513	Apr 28, 2012 by Michelle814
	how do i react to his drinking?? (Preview) So I seem to always post on here when I can't call anyone or go to a meeting. Its late so I can't call anyone and I am having an urgent moment. My "dry" bf is working tonight (at the bar) and I am down the street from his house hanging with some friends and planned on staying at his place tonight cu...	julesredgirl	4	532	Apr 28, 2012 by Jerry F
	Could Use Some ESH For the Upcoming Weekend (Preview) Hi all...I'm facing a situation this weekend, and I'm trying to decide how to handle it (and examine my motives as I choose the best course of action). My AH is in a bowling league at work. Usually bowling is after work on Wednesdays. Since he works second shift, this means bowling goes from 11 pm to 1 am...	stephaniej	7	539	Apr 28, 2012 by Wolfie55
	Progress, yes yes yes (Preview) A couple of gentle tests this week. My in laws emailed. They are in the area for a work thing (they live on the East Coast, I am on the West Coast) and said they picked up a suitcase from my AH that I had borrowed and found a piece of jewelry in it...wanted to know if it was mine, where to send it, etc. The old me...	Dolly Llama	5	527	Apr 28, 2012 by ilovedogs
	how do i react to his drinking?? (Preview) So I seem to always post on here when I can't call anyone or go to a meeting. Its late so I can't call anyone and I am having an urgent moment. My "dry" bf is working tonight (at the bar) and I am down the street from his house hanging with some friends and planned on staying at his place tonight cu...	julesredgirl	2	378	Apr 28, 2012 by callmemara
	I set a boundary, now I feel like the bad guy (Preview) My AH has been smoking a pipe lately, usually every morning while he's drinking coffee. He works from home and his office right now reeks of tobacco. I can't stand to walk down that hallway, and his office is right across the hall from my son's room. Anyway, he threw out his stinky pipe cleaners in the...	ilovedogs	10	718	Apr 28, 2012 by ilovedogs
	Who and when is appropriate to tell about your AH? (Preview) My whole family knows about my AH, but I don't keep them updated on each "incident." Now that my AH has messed up a few times again, I don't want to say anything because I'm hoping he'll get back up on his feet. At the same time, I don't want to lie to my family and close friends by saying that ever...	hummingbirdkerry	7	477	Apr 28, 2012 by Michelle814
	new at this and dont know what to do (Preview) 7 months ago i started dating someone who was 5 years sober, or so I thought. We went away for new years eve and he had a few drinks and said it was ok to have a few every now and then. Well 4 months later he went to rehab because he didnt want to end up "out of control". Since rehab he has been ve...	missingit	16	574	Apr 28, 2012 by missingit
	Can't help being hopeful (Preview) It's been over a week since my A has had a drink. Not by choice. He lost his wallet last week with his ATM card in it. This is the third time in a year and a half. He's twice asked me for money and I've refused to give him any. The past few days he's beginning to look better. He was barely eating for months but he se...	pineapple	6	339	Apr 28, 2012 by alexmaui
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