Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

oldbeforemytime · oldbeforemytime

I am new to this, I have an alcoholic father and it is passed down through generations. How does one deal with verbal abuse, emotional manipulation and the fact that they don't see it as a problem? I am really at the end of my rope, do I cut all ties, do I hand him over to authorities, do I keep my relationshi...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I experienced something that I have never experienced before in my life last night. I sat in our local courthouse & listened to over 350 names read that have passed away over the years in my community. One special thing happened that I will cherish the rest of my life. My dad never lived up here but th...

RobinKSC · RobinKSC

I am holding my breath, I have not reacted but I am really wanting some ES&H, experience strength and hope.... My 17 year old son wanted to buy his girlfriend a watch for Christmas. I thought ok $75 tops, he wanted to buy her a Coach watch. This is his first girlfriend and they have been dating a year, f...

imom · imom

I just want to thank all of you for sharing your posts. I am reading them for comfort and reassurance as I wait for my AH to come home. He went to visit his dad, with whom he always drinks. I know he is going to come home at the very least with a buzz. I am anxious and I keep telling myself to live and let go. ...

elizabeth · elizabeth

DO’S AND DON’TS DO’S Forgive Be honest with yourself Be humble Take it easy – tension is harmful Play – find recreation and hobbies Keep on trying whenever you fail Learn the facts about alcoholism Attend Al-Anon meetings often Pray DON’TS &nb...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I have one thing to say--I am content & have some serenity in my life. I hope others can say that too. Kathleen

hotrod · hotrod

IN ALANON WE BELIEVE LIFE IS FOR GROWTH-PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL AND SPIRITUALSTEP 5 HAS BEEN POSTED TO THE STEP WORK BOARD "Admitted to God, to Myself and Another Human Being the Exact Nature of My Wrongs" Please join us and share your thoughts.. This way we all grow Simply Clic...

davie · davie

Hi all, Its been a 2 and a half months since me and my AW have been seperated. she still tries to get in contact and control my emotions. for e.g last weekend my AW managed to get a hold of me by saying to my brother in law that my dog was about to get put down, i had to call so i did. anyways the conversation quickl...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

"Please don't wear perfume. Some of our members have chemical sensitivities." I think that's how it's said. Why is this? I never heard this at an AA meeting. Is chemical sensitivity psychosomatic? Real? Why do people n Alanon or recovery have it?

debhud · debhud

my A son recently lost everything due to his alcoholism. his wife, his kids and now his great job. (he went to a meeting at work intoxicated) he continues to drink excessively. i am finding excuses not to spend time with him. i am just so angry at him and this ugly disease. he has tools to use to help h...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I am starting to force the XAH to pick up our child when I am home from work - after 5 to assure she has a sober ride from him. He is now asking why I am making him wait until 5? What should I say? or Do I not respond as he frequently does to me? The local police department told me to do this so I can see whether he's...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I have shared I am on a nice journey with a cool guy.We are best friends and will meet in a few months. Been friends over 10 years. I am having to leave my cabin. My income just cannot do it, and take care of me. I need some dental stuff done, glasses, cloths. So back to my 5 acres. The loan I have on my place is suc...

Thumbelina · Thumbelina

Hi everybody. This is my first time on this site and i am pleased in a way. I have been married for 12y and have 2 children with my husband. I only today actually tried to find how much is too much to drink. and discovered that its 1,5 pint a day or 14 (units a wek, or just about 9,5 pints a week. if i got it rig...

cinders · cinders

My AH called last night to ask me about divorce papers. He is upset with me because I refuse to let him know where I live. He wants to come by with divorce papers so that they can be signed immediately and submitted. I guess sending me them by mail to a family member takes too long. I stood my ground and w...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

I'm in the middle of a very contentious divorce with my AH of 30 years. I suggested that we meet this past weekend to try to settle things on our own, one on one, without the courts having to settle our issues for us. Good thing I had my Al-Anon program tools with me when I met with him. He is still in full denia...

rellik · rellik

We have allways gone to my sisters house for Christmas Eve. The family hires a santa and the kids just love it. My side of the family allways drinks during this time. My wife has chose not to come this year. She told me she cannot be around alcohol yet. So she will be at her grandparents house with her family...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

The best I've ever read on the subject of detachment (with love). Letting Go" * To "let go" does not mean to stop caring; it means I can't do it for someone else. * To "let go" is not to cut myself off; it's the realization I can't control another. * To "let go" is not...

John · John

Each year we try to bring some strong holiday cheer in the MIP recovery homes with holiday decor and cards that can change the spirit of unforgotteness, aloniness, sorrows... Into a time of building new members and embracing a new way of life. To do this we ask ALL Memebers of Miracles in Process to part...

WornOutMrsFixIt · WornOutMrsFixIt

I started moving things into my own apartment this week. I will be out of my mom and dad's by the end of the year. Just going to be me and my doggies. I alternate between excited, sad and angry. Definitely not where I thought I would be at this stage in my life.

el-cee · el-cee

I have been sick for years. I form codependant relationships and enable. First my a ex and then my prob drinker son who is 19. The trouble is since finding alanon I have been detaching, he does nothing for himself and regularly behaves aggressively towards me and a couple of times to my younger boy who is...

cdrew422 · cdrew422

Hi, I'm new here. I haven't attended an alanon meeting yet, I am having problems figuring out what to do with my kids, but I need something- I need to talk to others that know. My husband is an alcoholic, he recently lost his job due to it, but then made a "commitment" to stop- well stop drinkin...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am resolved that there will be resolution to my health problems. I am just grateful that I am feeling better & that I hope to continue to enjoy another holiday season. Not much more to say except that my AH are getting along better & that is mostly due to another revelation of mine that I have bee...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I'm deeply grateful to both of my programs emphasis on Al-Anon. I can only exist serenely in today and that is time enough to deal with and live with what is present before me...lots of stuff...great, good, pleasant, curious, somewhat anxious, worrisome, frightening and terrorizing. Most of wh...

Rosieee · Rosieee

When I reconnected with my teenage sweetheart, I thought the fact that he was in AA was refreshing after being with an active alcoholic (in denial) for 25 years. He's very enlightened and spiritual, and it seemed like our lives mirrored each others in so many ways. So, I moved in with him...with my tw...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I have shared the ex A's disease took everything. I thought it was over. Its gotten where I cannot even afford to live up here in my cabin. I gotta go try to fix up a part of my place on the 5 acres to be liveable. Bring my horse Elgin home. It is still where the mortgage co. commited fraud so there it sits, still...

sweeetr · sweeetr

I just wana scream !!!!!!

almostgivenup · almostgivenup

I love my husband so very much. I know that I post all the terrible things that come with his alcohlism, but he can be a really great man. He cooks wonderful dinners almost every night and anything I want (materially) I get. He goes on and on about how beautiful I am and I know he really does love me. I lo...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I have been up since 1am praying to God and thanking him for what he has done for me in the last few weeks. He has taught me many lessons with the help of all my good friends here and in my face to face meetings. He has also brought Jon into my life to help with my son. Tonight my son went to AA. He already got a s...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

Only 5 days into No Contact i don't feel right. It's like I've slipped and am self will run riot out there. I don't feel I'm doing what God wants me to do. I can give you all kinds of sad stories about the way I've been treated by my family. it sucks, yes. Do I want a different family? I don't know. I got the best o...

karren26 · karren26

Day three of him not talking to me after the insane random blow up Sunday night. He did come home last night with a six pack and went into the basement, heard him on the phone. 7:30 came up and got in his car and left. Went to a co workers. He never does this. Came in at 11:30 then called into work this morning an...

imom · imom

Why is it that every time I see him under the influence, I feel the need to point it out to him. Of course he only denies it and then we end up in a fight. I know there's no reason for me to point it out, I guess I just really want him to know that he's not getting away with anything...that I know. I realize it's...

RobinKSC · RobinKSC

Is anyone else having trouble?

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning I'm happy to say I'm learning every day to take care of me and not enage my son. Yesterday he called me in a panic that he lost his keys at a work site he was doing a odd job picking up trash for my AA friend. He also had a homeless man there that he gave a few cents to because he won't leave my son al...

Minaret · Minaret

I really need help in the area of detactment...I seem to do well for a while, but then my AH starts bugging me and I fall into the trap of "reacting" to him again. Last night he was angry and yelling at the kids, and what makes him angrier is when I correct him in front of the kids which I often do, b...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I don't know where to begin with this really. I've always suspected this woman I work with is passive aggressive. There have just been too many instances at this point to think anything else. Today, I decided to lead with doing the right thing and thank her for a sympathy card she had put on my desk whil...

karren26 · karren26

I think I put this as my own statement in a post yesterday, but I am sitting here wondering if he feels threatened because I have not been drinking with him and more and more time is going by. Does it make him feel like I am judging him or he has failed. He has been making digs that I think I am better than other...

cinders · cinders

With all the abusive blaming and other things that have gone on in my 10 years with my husband, you would think that I would be glad to have some distance, but I can't seem to keep from wanting to talk to him and try to understand what is going on. I had to email my soon to be ex and ask him to send paperwork relea...

bridgetp · bridgetp

I have to pick up my husband from the airport for his three weeks of holiday. I live in DUrban and he works in Nigeria and I discovered the last time he was home that he's been drinking and whoring all this time while I've been in total ignorance. Once I discovered what was g oing on his behaviour patterns...

callmemara · callmemara

In order to cheer me up, let's each list a FUNNY thing that our A does when they are in their A-zone. Mine takes bites of whole raw onions. That's right, I find whole onions with bites taken out of them in the fridge.

bmom · bmom

Hello, I'm bmom, which stands for the first letter of my AS's name and me being his mom. This is my first post and honestly, I'm so broken right now that words fail me...but I know they will come and I will share more. My AS is 28 years-old and says he is going to an AA meeting this Wednesday. I say, "I...

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

So, I'm up late stressing out. There is an empty bottle of Captain Morgan's on the counter and another one thats just over half full. They are the big ones, 1.75 liters. They go through about 4 of those a week. This is really hard for me to just admit that there may be an issue here. It would be so much easier t...

karren26 · karren26

Husband has been drinking heavy almost every night for a couple weeks with maybe a two day break in there. He did something stupid in front of twenty year old daughter and her boyfriend last night, I was not in the room. He embarrassed them. He is on Prozac so he gets drunk fast. He twists things around t...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I set boundaries about 4 days ago with parents after more abusive emails. I have not returned emails. I feel it wounds my spirit to be treated like that by anyone and my entire family has had no respect for me for years. All the family dysfunction was put on my shoulders when I was 12 so others wouldn't have...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I had two more adults in town pull me aside, concerned about my daughter, and telling me about my ex's new alcohlic/drug addict girlfriend that I know "nothing" (wink, wink) about and my daughter is nothing but pissed off about (she told me about the GF weeks ago, the ex and I do NOT talk at all...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

Here is my dilemma... My work schedule tends to be a little hectic sometimes. I have managed to go to 2 different group's meetings in my area. Both meetings had about 10 people there and I was the ONLY guy there. I didn't really feel like I could relate to anyone there. Maybe this was in part because th...

rellik · rellik

I don't know how else to say this other than it's working! Last Wednesday night she had her work Christmas party. They were drinking at her table and she couldn't take it. SHe didn't drink during the dinner, but she didn't make it home either. (27th day of sobriety) She stopped at three gas stations and...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Many of you know I have been looking for permanent employment for over a year. I had a long-term temporary job, but that ended about 6 weeks ago. The job market where I live is not good. Next Tuesday I will be interviewing for a government job. The salary is enough, the benefits would be good, and I thin...

rehprof · rehprof

So, this morning we have a snow day...I went out to my 16YO's room and it was 80 degrees...I asked him to turn the temp down...he then proceeded to tell me it was NOT hot in there...and I said...come on, hon, the pellets cost money..I've bought $60 in the last couple of weeks. He says "well Dad GAVE yo...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning all Well I got this text from my son. In reply to your vm which I just heard, yes I did hang up . I am not mad now at you in any way. I felt I was getting emotionally compromised. I will let you know what happens. I have plans to remove my pain, depression and anixiety forever. It is up to my son, G...

dancer_in_pain · dancer_in_pain

First of all, hello and glad to have found all of you here, though, not glad that we even need this forum. Here is my story. I am 58 years old, married to a man who is a functioning alcoholic, for 37 years, was dating him for 1.5 years before we married. He drinks beer, in early days beer and heavy liquor, s...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

Only abut 4 days ago i cut contact with my family after the last straw of 25 years of scapegoatism, rejection, manipulation, and general insanity. I did my own work and they had their chance too...when i would end up in the hospital after suicide attempts due to depression and denial many a doctor refer...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

So yesterday I tell the wife that we should go see a movie last night. I gave about 4-5 choices and let her pick from there. She chose "Flight" with Denzel Washington. The description of the movie says NOTHING about the fact that the main story is really one of an alcoholic. I won't give aw...

Jozie · Jozie

You Know, Even after 4yrs of Recovery, this Disease of Addictions STILL Gets to me! Its Amazing how a Weekend Full of Hope & Happiness Can all be over shadowed by the Disease of Addictions... I'm Just Sick to Death of the Ones I love Leaving this World so Young... This Young Man...33 Use to stay with u...

Jill · Jill

Do you know after embracing AlAnon a whilethe program starts to show up in a lot of places? I was reading a magazine this morning. One of the cartoons had two cats strolling along, and one said to the other "It's live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live and let live, ...

AlAnonDave · AlAnonDave

For whatever reason, I have mixed feelings about the holidays. It brings back some difficult memories and definitely a lot of stress trying to get things done. Rolling back to when I was young- my Dad had custody of my older brother and I and he tried to make ends meet and did the best he could I think at mak...

Carla042 · Carla042

Greetings, I am struggling in a big way with family issues and I'm really in a bad place...Due to the issues that my older kids are having right now my family has basically alienated me and my kids and I'm having an extremely difficult time as family was everything to me. We were uninvited from Thanksgiv...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Is it OK not to take calls anymore. My son is enaging me a lot and now we got into a arguement about his car. He wants me to take it and I said NO...now he's mad that I'm so heartless on taking the gift. I think its alcohol time. He's thinks he moving to another country....WHAT??? Is it OK to be done with you...

tortuga · tortuga

I am moving towards this: but I have to say it's scary, because I used to believe in the good things I believed in true happiness, I also believed that it would be enough to love somebody with a true heart ... but in this disease I discovered also that no matter how much effort, love or hope I have in a day, it...

peacewithin · peacewithin

My AH has stopped drinking 4 months but its starting to get hard. Its as if he were drinking or worse. He blames me for everything. I walk on egg shells all the time you neve know what is going to set him off. last night every thing was fine. till he tried to get the dog in the house. and the dog wanted to stay out...

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

My parents moved in with us 3 months ago. They are active A's and drink every night. Things have started to get tense because of the drinking. I'm afraid of confronting them about anything. Afraid to say no, just like when I was a child. I don't want to cause issues because I don't want to see them homeless...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	My father... (Preview) I am new to this, I have an alcoholic father and it is passed down through generations. How does one deal with verbal abuse, emotional manipulation and the fact that they don't see it as a problem? I am really at the end of my rope, do I cut all ties, do I hand him over to authorities, do I keep my relationshi...	oldbeforemytime	4	323	Dec 16, 2012 by Tarase
	Tree of memories & me! (Preview) I experienced something that I have never experienced before in my life last night. I sat in our local courthouse & listened to over 350 names read that have passed away over the years in my community. One special thing happened that I will cherish the rest of my life. My dad never lived up here but th...	Hoot Nanny	1	292	Dec 16, 2012 by Jen
	Having a hard time breathing - am I over reacting? (Preview) I am holding my breath, I have not reacted but I am really wanting some ES&H, experience strength and hope.... My 17 year old son wanted to buy his girlfriend a watch for Christmas. I thought ok $75 tops, he wanted to buy her a Coach watch. This is his first girlfriend and they have been dating a year, f...	RobinKSC	3	347	Dec 16, 2012 by Jen
	thankful (Preview) I just want to thank all of you for sharing your posts. I am reading them for comfort and reassurance as I wait for my AH to come home. He went to visit his dad, with whom he always drinks. I know he is going to come home at the very least with a buzz. I am anxious and I keep telling myself to live and let go. ...	imom	3	310	Dec 16, 2012 by Jerry F
	The DO's and DON'Ts of Al-anon (Preview) DO’S AND DON’TS DO’S Forgive Be honest with yourself Be humble Take it easy – tension is harmful Play – find recreation and hobbies Keep on trying whenever you fail Learn the facts about alcoholism Attend Al-Anon meetings often Pray DON’TS &nb...	elizabeth	4	654	Dec 16, 2012 by cla
	one thing to say! (Preview) *I have one thing to say--I am content & have some serenity in my life. I hope others can say that too.* *Kathleen*	Hoot Nanny	3	265	Dec 16, 2012 by kaybee
	Step 5 Step Work Board (Preview) *IN ALANON WE BELIEVE LIFE IS FOR* GROWTH-PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL AND SPIRITUALSTEP 5 HAS BEEN POSTED TO THE STEP WORK BOARD "Admitted to God, to Myself and Another Human Being the Exact Nature of My Wrongs" Please join us and share your thoughts.. This way we all grow Simply Clic...	hotrod	0	312	Dec 15, 2012 by hotrod
	Detatchment (Preview) Hi all, Its been a 2 and a half months since me and my AW have been seperated. she still tries to get in contact and control my emotions. for e.g last weekend my AW managed to get a hold of me by saying to my brother in law that my dog was about to get put down, i had to call so i did. anyways the conversation quickl...	davie	3	283	Dec 16, 2012 by WorkingThroughIt
	Why do some Alanon meetings say... (Preview) "Please don't wear perfume. Some of our members have chemical sensitivities." I think that's how it's said. Why is this? I never heard this at an AA meeting. Is chemical sensitivity psychosomatic? Real? Why do people n Alanon or recovery have it?	WorkingThroughIt	11	628	Dec 15, 2012 by RobinKSC
	feel guilty because i am avoiding A son (Preview) my A son recently lost everything due to his alcoholism. his wife, his kids and now his great job. (he went to a meeting at work intoxicated) he continues to drink excessively. i am finding excuses not to spend time with him. i am just so angry at him and this ugly disease. he has tools to use to help h...	debhud	7	490	Dec 15, 2012 by tired of trying
	Help! Starting to push back on drinking and driving with our child (Preview) I am starting to force the XAH to pick up our child when I am home from work - after 5 to assure she has a sober ride from him. He is now asking why I am making him wait until 5? What should I say? or Do I not respond as he frequently does to me? The local police department told me to do this so I can see whether he's...	abbyalana	3	418	Dec 15, 2012 by Jerry F
	what does this mean? (Preview) I have shared I am on a nice journey with a cool guy.We are best friends and will meet in a few months. Been friends over 10 years. I am having to leave my cabin. My income just cannot do it, and take care of me. I need some dental stuff done, glasses, cloths. So back to my 5 acres. The loan I have on my place is suc...	Debilyn	1	393	Dec 15, 2012 by Mattie
	New here. My husband has drinking problem. Drinking problem husband (Preview) Hi everybody. This is my first time on this site and i am pleased in a way. I have been married for 12y and have 2 children with my husband. I only today actually tried to find how much is too much to drink. and discovered that its 1,5 pint a day or 14 (units a wek, or just about 9,5 pints a week. if i got it rig...	Thumbelina	4	4870	Dec 15, 2012 by hotrod
	Letting go - Finally!! (Preview) My AH called last night to ask me about divorce papers. He is upset with me because I refuse to let him know where I live. He wants to come by with divorce papers so that they can be signed immediately and submitted. I guess sending me them by mail to a family member takes too long. I stood my ground and w...	cinders	5	521	Dec 15, 2012 by orchidlover
	Divorce Settlement Issues (Preview) I'm in the middle of a very contentious divorce with my AH of 30 years. I suggested that we meet this past weekend to try to settle things on our own, one on one, without the courts having to settle our issues for us. Good thing I had my Al-Anon program tools with me when I met with him. He is still in full denia...	Green Eyes	8	635	Dec 15, 2012 by bud
	Christmas Eve apart for the first time in 13yrs (Preview) We have allways gone to my sisters house for Christmas Eve. The family hires a santa and the kids just love it. My side of the family allways drinks during this time. My wife has chose not to come this year. She told me she cannot be around alcohol yet. So she will be at her grandparents house with her family...	rellik	10	403	Dec 15, 2012 by hotrod
	Detachment ( with love ) (Preview) The best I've ever read on the subject of detachment (with love). Letting Go" * To "let go" does not mean to stop caring; it means I can't do it for someone else. * To "let go" is not to cut myself off; it's the realization I can't control another. * To "let go" is not...	Cathyinaz	7	633	Dec 14, 2012 by sweeetr
	holiday card request for MIP house residents (Preview) Each year we try to bring some strong holiday cheer in the MIP recovery homes with holiday decor and cards that can change the spirit of unforgotteness, aloniness, sorrows... Into a time of building new members and embracing a new way of life. To do this we ask ALL Memebers of Miracles in Process to part...	John	0	309	Dec 14, 2012 by John
	The Next Right Thing (Preview) I started moving things into my own apartment this week. I will be out of my mom and dad's by the end of the year. Just going to be me and my doggies. I alternate between excited, sad and angry. Definitely not where I thought I would be at this stage in my life.	WornOutMrsFixIt	2	327	Dec 14, 2012 by WorkingThroughIt
	sick of being sick (Preview) I have been sick for years. I form codependant relationships and enable. First my a ex and then my prob drinker son who is 19. The trouble is since finding alanon I have been detaching, he does nothing for himself and regularly behaves aggressively towards me and a couple of times to my younger boy who is...	el-cee	2	375	Dec 14, 2012 by Zimmy
	I'm new here... (Preview) Hi, I'm new here. I haven't attended an alanon meeting yet, I am having problems figuring out what to do with my kids, but I need something- I need to talk to others that know. My husband is an alcoholic, he recently lost his job due to it, but then made a "commitment" to stop- well stop drinkin...	cdrew422	3	400	Dec 14, 2012 by Zimmy
	resolve & resolution (Preview) I am resolved that there will be resolution to my health problems. I am just grateful that I am feeling better & that I hope to continue to enjoy another holiday season. Not much more to say except that my AH are getting along better & that is mostly due to another revelation of mine that I have bee...	Hoot Nanny	3	290	Dec 14, 2012 by Jen
	Facing the unknown and the expected... (Preview) I'm deeply grateful to both of my programs emphasis on Al-Anon. I can only exist serenely in today and that is time enough to deal with and live with what is present before me...lots of stuff...great, good, pleasant, curious, somewhat anxious, worrisome, frightening and terrorizing. Most of wh...	Jerry F	6	586	Dec 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	Looking for any help - newbie with recovering alcoholic (Preview) When I reconnected with my teenage sweetheart, I thought the fact that he was in AA was refreshing after being with an active alcoholic (in denial) for 25 years. He's very enlightened and spiritual, and it seemed like our lives mirrored each others in so many ways. So, I moved in with him...with my tw...	Rosieee	6	408	Dec 14, 2012 by Rosieee
	Losses keep coming (Preview) I have shared the ex A's disease took everything. I thought it was over. Its gotten where I cannot even afford to live up here in my cabin. I gotta go try to fix up a part of my place on the 5 acres to be liveable. Bring my horse Elgin home. It is still where the mortgage co. commited fraud so there it sits, still...	Debilyn	8	528	Dec 14, 2012 by tiredtonite
	Losing it (Preview) I just wana scream !!!!!!	sweeetr	3	303	Dec 14, 2012 by Pushka
	Really? Is this the life I am meant to lead? (Preview) I love my husband so very much. I know that I post all the terrible things that come with his alcohlism, but he can be a really great man. He cooks wonderful dinners almost every night and anything I want (materially) I get. He goes on and on about how beautiful I am and I know he really does love me. I lo...	almostgivenup	12	631	Dec 14, 2012 by Lyne
	My HP at work (Preview) I have been up since 1am praying to God and thanking him for what he has done for me in the last few weeks. He has taught me many lessons with the help of all my good friends here and in my face to face meetings. He has also brought Jon into my life to help with my son. Tonight my son went to AA. He already got a s...	Cathyinaz	6	388	Dec 13, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Update on No Contact (Preview) Only 5 days into No Contact i don't feel right. It's like I've slipped and am self will run riot out there. I don't feel I'm doing what God wants me to do. I can give you all kinds of sad stories about the way I've been treated by my family. it sucks, yes. Do I want a different family? I don't know. I got the best o...	WorkingThroughIt	9	699	Dec 13, 2012 by pinkchip
	When I leave it will be a shelter (Preview) Day three of him not talking to me after the insane random blow up Sunday night. He did come home last night with a six pack and went into the basement, heard him on the phone. 7:30 came up and got in his car and left. Went to a co workers. He never does this. Came in at 11:30 then called into work this morning an...	karren26	4	476	Dec 13, 2012 by karren26
	i can't stop (Preview) Why is it that every time I see him under the influence, I feel the need to point it out to him. Of course he only denies it and then we end up in a fight. I know there's no reason for me to point it out, I guess I just really want him to know that he's not getting away with anything...that I know. I realize it's...	imom	14	620	Dec 13, 2012 by imom
	having trouble getting into the chat room (Preview) Is anyone else having trouble?	RobinKSC	2	266	Dec 13, 2012 by wp
	Used a Tool yesterday (Preview) Good Morning I'm happy to say I'm learning every day to take care of me and not enage my son. Yesterday he called me in a panic that he lost his keys at a work site he was doing a odd job picking up trash for my AA friend. He also had a homeless man there that he gave a few cents to because he won't leave my son al...	Cathyinaz	2	329	Dec 12, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Examples of Loving Detachment? (Preview) I really need help in the area of detactment...I seem to do well for a while, but then my AH starts bugging me and I fall into the trap of "reacting" to him again. Last night he was angry and yelling at the kids, and what makes him angrier is when I correct him in front of the kids which I often do, b...	Minaret	13	5315	Dec 12, 2012 by Zimmy
	I Left Her Words Where They Belonged, with Her (Preview) I don't know where to begin with this really. I've always suspected this woman I work with is passive aggressive. There have just been too many instances at this point to think anything else. Today, I decided to lead with doing the right thing and thank her for a sympathy card she had put on my desk whil...	tiredtonite	11	490	Dec 12, 2012 by RobinKSC
	Is it because I no longer drink with him? (Preview) I think I put this as my own statement in a post yesterday, but I am sitting here wondering if he feels threatened because I have not been drinking with him and more and more time is going by. Does it make him feel like I am judging him or he has failed. He has been making digs that I think I am better than other...	karren26	7	498	Dec 12, 2012 by karren26
	Struggling with attempting to have no contact (Preview) With all the abusive blaming and other things that have gone on in my 10 years with my husband, you would think that I would be glad to have some distance, but I can't seem to keep from wanting to talk to him and try to understand what is going on. I had to email my soon to be ex and ask him to send paperwork relea...	cinders	14	797	Dec 12, 2012 by pinkchip
	coping with him coming home (Preview) I have to pick up my husband from the airport for his three weeks of holiday. I live in DUrban and he works in Nigeria and I discovered the last time he was home that he's been drinking and whoring all this time while I've been in total ignorance. Once I discovered what was g oing on his behaviour patterns...	bridgetp	4	320	Dec 12, 2012 by bridgetp
	Something funny (Preview) In order to cheer me up, let's each list a FUNNY thing that our A does when they are in their A-zone. Mine takes bites of whole raw onions. That's right, I find whole onions with bites taken out of them in the fridge.	callmemara	6	488	Dec 12, 2012 by rehprof
	Does a mother's heart every stop breaking? (Preview) Hello, I'm bmom, which stands for the first letter of my AS's name and me being his mom. This is my first post and honestly, I'm so broken right now that words fail me...but I know they will come and I will share more. My AS is 28 years-old and says he is going to an AA meeting this Wednesday. I say, "I...	bmom	8	475	Dec 12, 2012 by bmom
	Up late stressing (Preview) So, I'm up late stressing out. There is an empty bottle of Captain Morgan's on the counter and another one thats just over half full. They are the big ones, 1.75 liters. They go through about 4 of those a week. This is really hard for me to just admit that there may be an issue here. It would be so much easier t...	StargazerLily	2	290	Dec 12, 2012 by bud
	After 21 years REALLY confronted him (Preview) Husband has been drinking heavy almost every night for a couple weeks with maybe a two day break in there. He did something stupid in front of twenty year old daughter and her boyfriend last night, I was not in the room. He embarrassed them. He is on Prozac so he gets drunk fast. He twists things around t...	karren26	15	558	Dec 12, 2012 by karren26
	Stand up or tolerate? (Preview) I set boundaries about 4 days ago with parents after more abusive emails. I have not returned emails. I feel it wounds my spirit to be treated like that by anyone and my entire family has had no respect for me for years. All the family dysfunction was put on my shoulders when I was 12 so others wouldn't have...	WorkingThroughIt	6	483	Dec 11, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	I am really trying to not be crazed but feeling that way anyways (Preview) I had two more adults in town pull me aside, concerned about my daughter, and telling me about my ex's new alcohlic/drug addict girlfriend that I know "nothing" (wink, wink) about and my daughter is nothing but pissed off about (she told me about the GF weeks ago, the ex and I do NOT talk at all...	abbyalana	5	429	Dec 11, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Online meetings as opposed to Face to Face? (Preview) Here is my dilemma... My work schedule tends to be a little hectic sometimes. I have managed to go to 2 different group's meetings in my area. Both meetings had about 10 people there and I was the ONLY guy there. I didn't really feel like I could relate to anyone there. Maybe this was in part because th...	hdftby100	3	504	Dec 11, 2012 by Breakingfree
	It's working!!!!! (Preview) I don't know how else to say this other than it's working! Last Wednesday night she had her work Christmas party. They were drinking at her table and she couldn't take it. SHe didn't drink during the dinner, but she didn't make it home either. (27th day of sobriety) She stopped at three gas stations and...	rellik	6	380	Dec 11, 2012 by Desirae
	I have a job interview (Preview) Many of you know I have been looking for permanent employment for over a year. I had a long-term temporary job, but that ended about 6 weeks ago. The job market where I live is not good. Next Tuesday I will be interviewing for a government job. The salary is enough, the benefits would be good, and I thin...	stephaniej	5	338	Dec 11, 2012 by tiredtonite
	Pellet Stove VENT! (Preview) So, this morning we have a snow day...I went out to my 16YO's room and it was 80 degrees...I asked him to turn the temp down...he then proceeded to tell me it was NOT hot in there...and I said...come on, hon, the pellets cost money..I've bought $60 in the last couple of weeks. He says "well Dad GAVE yo...	rehprof	5	456	Dec 11, 2012 by Jerry F
	Let go Let God (Preview) Good Morning all Well I got this text from my son. In reply to your vm which I just heard, yes I did hang up . I am not mad now at you in any way. I felt I was getting emotionally compromised. I will let you know what happens. I have plans to remove my pain, depression and anixiety forever. It is up to my son, G...	Cathyinaz	8	457	Dec 11, 2012 by Jerry F
	I am new here, new to Al Anon and in pain, like us all (Preview) First of all, hello and glad to have found all of you here, though, not glad that we even need this forum. Here is my story. I am 58 years old, married to a man who is a functioning alcoholic, for 37 years, was dating him for 1.5 years before we married. He drinks beer, in early days beer and heavy liquor, s...	dancer_in_pain	11	682	Dec 11, 2012 by dancer_in_pain
	Threatening calls from parent & chaos in my life (Preview) Only abut 4 days ago i cut contact with my family after the last straw of 25 years of scapegoatism, rejection, manipulation, and general insanity. I did my own work and they had their chance too...when i would end up in the hospital after suicide attempts due to depression and denial many a doctor refer...	WorkingThroughIt	3	281	Dec 11, 2012 by WorkingThroughIt
	Ironic movie choice (Preview) So yesterday I tell the wife that we should go see a movie last night. I gave about 4-5 choices and let her pick from there. She chose "Flight" with Denzel Washington. The description of the movie says NOTHING about the fact that the main story is really one of an alcoholic. I won't give aw...	hdftby100	3	297	Dec 11, 2012 by Aloha
	Death By Disease... (Preview) You Know, Even after 4yrs of Recovery, this Disease of Addictions STILL Gets to me! Its Amazing how a Weekend Full of Hope & Happiness Can all be over shadowed by the Disease of Addictions... I'm Just Sick to Death of the Ones I love Leaving this World so Young... This Young Man...33 Use to stay with u...	Jozie	7	474	Dec 11, 2012 by orchidlover
	It's Everywhere (Preview) Do you know after embracing AlAnon a whilethe program starts to show up in a lot of places? I was reading a magazine this morning. One of the cartoons had two cats strolling along, and one said to the other "It's live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live and let live, ...	Jill	1	324	Dec 10, 2012 by Path to Serenity
	Holidays- a tough time of year for me (Preview) For whatever reason, I have mixed feelings about the holidays. It brings back some difficult memories and definitely a lot of stress trying to get things done. Rolling back to when I was young- my Dad had custody of my older brother and I and he tried to make ends meet and did the best he could I think at mak...	AlAnonDave	14	589	Dec 10, 2012 by Carla042
	Struggling... (Preview) Greetings, I am struggling in a big way with family issues and I'm really in a bad place...Due to the issues that my older kids are having right now my family has basically alienated me and my kids and I'm having an extremely difficult time as family was everything to me. We were uninvited from Thanksgiv...	Carla042	6	514	Dec 10, 2012 by Carla042
	Getting anger and pity party calls (Preview) Is it OK not to take calls anymore. My son is enaging me a lot and now we got into a arguement about his car. He wants me to take it and I said NO...now he's mad that I'm so heartless on taking the gift. I think its alcohol time. He's thinks he moving to another country....WHAT??? Is it OK to be done with you...	Cathyinaz	14	779	Dec 10, 2012 by Path to Serenity
	scared with letting go of the things that makes you sad (Preview) I am moving towards this: but I have to say it's scary, because I used to believe in the good things I believed in true happiness, I also believed that it would be enough to love somebody with a true heart ... but in this disease I discovered also that no matter how much effort, love or hope I have in a day, it...	tortuga	11	505	Dec 10, 2012 by one_moment
	Living with a dry drunk (Preview) My AH has stopped drinking 4 months but its starting to get hard. Its as if he were drinking or worse. He blames me for everything. I walk on egg shells all the time you neve know what is going to set him off. last night every thing was fine. till he tried to get the dog in the house. and the dog wanted to stay out...	peacewithin	8	2673	Dec 10, 2012 by AlAnonDave
	Having a hard time. (Preview) My parents moved in with us 3 months ago. They are active A's and drink every night. Things have started to get tense because of the drinking. I'm afraid of confronting them about anything. Afraid to say no, just like when I was a child. I don't want to cause issues because I don't want to see them homeless...	StargazerLily	3	368	Dec 10, 2012 by Jen
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.