Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

neshema2 · neshema2

Daughter #2 tried me AGAIN!!! ....I told you all about the "dinner" she stood me up on about 2-3 weeks ago and didn't even apologize for it and that it was something she INSISTED upon....a "mom and daughter dinner" HER idea...And she pulled the head games on me again, ...and h...

Heronbeach · Heronbeach

My BF is an alcoholic/addict. Right now he is using but had a 5 month sober period. He says I'm never happy, even when he was sober he says I was never satisfied. Is this uncommon? I feel as though he may be right....he is drinking and using I'm enraged. If he is sober then I always figure he will mess it up any...

lonelygirl101 · lonelygirl101

Im a 23 yr old singe mom who grew up with an alcoholic for a mother and an absent father. I was put into the CYS at the age of 12 and stayed there till i was 18. My mother passed away 2 years ago in feb and now i am struggling with more issues than i ever had while she was alive. I am now a 23 yr old single mom who is ha...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Be on the lookout for symptoms of inner peace. The hearts of a great many have already been exposed to inner peace and it is possible that people everywhere could come down with it in epidemic proportions. This could pose a serious threat to what has, up to now, been a fairly stable condition of conflict...

Baffledinva · Baffledinva

First thanks for reading as I can't wrap my head around something. Been dating/engaged to a woman on and off for 3 years. She is 44 y/o with Alc and Cocaine Addiction. Been through many treatments. Longest sober is 90 days ( for last 6-7 years). Anyway I have been supporting her, she lived with me till she...

dori711 · dori711

He never quit drinking, but he cut down a bit or maybe not. I thought I had mastered the step to not nag him about his drinking and I haven't been. Sometimes I cry silently, but say nothing. The problem that I am having a hard time with is his temper. Usually he loses it with me. We use to work as a te...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everyone: Every once in a while, I take a look at the 'diary' of old posts and private messages since HP directed me hear in 2012. It is helpful for me to see where I was, the journey, where things are at now and through all of it....all of you. I wanted to take a few moments to just express gratitude for a...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of the worldwide fellowship of al-anon. There is a young lady that I have befriended in the fellowship that I have began to take an interest in. She is the daughter of another member. We've been talking over the last few weeks and I got her phone...

deacon · deacon

Where can I find that posting? I am great at setting boundaries but maybe not so good at keeping them. I am wondering if it is a learned skill or if I have the wrong idea of what a boundary is. Thanks.

Aloha · Aloha

I thought it important to bring this day's reading up because more often than not, there are members who are under the circumstances of being faced with physical violence. Today's reading is very poignant and I realize for me it must be taken to heart should I find myself under similar circumstances e...

Gaby · Gaby

This maybe to soon for me thinking. But as most of you know my son (by choice) admitted himself in a Christian Base Recovery House. I am very proud and support him on his sobriety. We talked today and there I am hearing myself say to him " I have fears " well I can hear his fustration because he say...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

So lately I have been trying to focus on me. Leave it in HP hands. No snooping, no asking questions just moment to moment. Last night I was carrying my 13 month old around at bedtime and my A gave her his cell phone to play with. She was pressing buttons and up popped a fb msg from A to this girl he had an affair w...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Very grateful right now. There was just an incident in my building in which a young man got stuck in an elevator. It was a new elevator that was just put in, and it got stuck. I began to hear some ringing of the emergency bell and some ye...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi Guys I have been pretty grounded this week. Yes I know because my son is safe in rehab but still I think I'm doing OK. So much OK that I had to stop and get my car serviced with a oil change. While I was waiting I get a text from a friend and she asked if I would stop by for a little while. I usually just go ho...

karma13 · karma13

I cross posted this on the other list I'm on so if you see this twice, ignore :) So I have a close friend at work that I trusted, obviously I should not have trusted her..but my higher power puts people in my life to learn a lesson. Long story short, she decided to tell my boss on Friday that I don't do my job wel...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

My AM continues to drink daily. It's an on going battle to sit back and do nothing until she wants to take that 1st Step. I just talked with her and told her how much it hurts us to see her go through this..just existing not really living...how we're here to support her but until she hits her rock bottom and a...

Milehi-tlc · Milehi-tlc

First time posting but long time lurker. I want to thank all the posters here for their shares. It has helped me more than I can say. Last year my husband of 30 years started drinking again after 20, or so, being dry without a program. All the abusive behaviors returned And he started hanging out at th...

FAITH1988 · FAITH1988

Hi everyone, I have not been on the board for awhile. Retreat week end of July at son's rehab an eye opener. AS is doing good, has returned to his work who paid for rehab (God Bless Them) and enrolled back at the university ( employer pays for that too) and still goes to intensive outpatient 2 nights a week a...

qwerty49 · qwerty49

Okay so received a text from my alcoholic mother saying 'I'm going to bed now to have a stroke, thanks daughter'.... I had a panic attack & it upset me so much.. & next day i received another text 'If i'm to come to Cornwall I have to come tomorrow, because i have to be back'. I told her i was upset abo...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Had an awareness as to what some of my problem was last week. I wasn't feeling right with meetings because my focus got off track. It's so wonderful to have this program because I learn so much more awareness of my own issues and where things stem from, where my unhappiness comes from, and now I'm learn...

islandtime · islandtime

You know when it's been quiet, And you are lulled into a false sense of "maybe this isn't so bad", something's gonna hit the fan. So here's last night. I stay in the den at night, have become quite content to be by myself, comfy and cozy. With a kitty or two. On the laptop or watching TV. Th...

Raven Juniper · Raven Juniper

This past week I was very happy to start back at square one. I truly understand now that I need to focus on myself and my own recovery. The last 2 months have been hell, even worse than all the months leading up to this past July. The reason I feel this way is that I've finally had to swallow the knots in my thro...

joker · joker

It's been 4 months now since I have seen my alcoholic ex-bf, that was violent toward me. He remains in jail for abusing me. I am today, so grateful to be free of the insanity. I am now living alone and loving each day and I feel no sense of lonlyiness. Is that normal? I do not feel the need for another relation...

neshema2 · neshema2

I had the greatest talk w/my cousin who is my favorite of all relatives....she rates up there , maybe even more than my A brothers whom I love.........She and I grew up together....the respite i got from my hell was at her house w/her parents....we are fraternal cousins and very close in age.... we play...

NoTactician · NoTactician

Hi there I am new to this board, so I hope it's ok if I just jump in. My husband is currently passed out in our bed. He phoned me after work and asked me to come and meet him downtown... I did, and he was sitting at a bus stop, pretty drunk, and looking so sad it broke my heart. I managed to drag him home (the most mo...

gofred123 · gofred123

I have been sober for 6 months, 14 days, 23 1/2 hours and feel I have listened to every aspect of what I did not achieve in the marriage prior to my dry date. I have and continue addressing each aspect and have made changes and advancement in each category and there have been times when things seemed to be...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am frustrated a bit. Actually this time of year we have our annual Al anon speaker cruise on the lake. It is a boat that has a lot of space below. I guess I might be over-reacting a bit. I am just under a little stress. I couldn't find the shoes I was looking for to wear today. I guess I am being a bit silly about...

Rose50 · Rose50

I last had contact with my son on Monday via text. He said he was doing good and that maybe we could have lunch the following day. Per his words, it would finally be his treat. Well he didn't call on Tuesday and I haven't heard from him since. I sent him a text today...no response. He either relapsed again or...

Heronbeach · Heronbeach

My boyfriend is smart, well educated, and a crack addict. How do I deal with this? He moved out two weeks ago, got his own place and has been on a couple benders since. He will drink and automatically want to get high. I feel like I don't even know this person who goes downtown Seattle to buy crack from shady...

el-cee · el-cee

I have messed up once again concerning my son and I's relationship. To recap - I asked my 20yr old son to leave the home on February this year which he did do - fast forward past the fear, worry, guilt then acceptance, a bit of peace and building bridges (mixed with a bit of enabling). During the summer I le...

Ness · Ness

1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing - that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us. 2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and the rest of the world was insane. 3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills a...

Lyne · Lyne

A really cool thing about my alanon brain is that there is a link I can click on that takes me right to HP! Have a great day everyone, Lyne

sportychick · sportychick

I have shared on here before about my relationship with my mother. My mother is an untreated Adult child of an Alcoholic. My husband and I with our 3 year old son are currently living back at my parents place and hope to purchase our first home together in the New year. I am grateful for my parents for allow...

Heronbeach · Heronbeach

I have broken up with my boyfriend of about a year and a half. The breakup was mutual, but hard for both us. He is an alcoholic/addict. He will be sober for certain amounts of time, then it all goes downhill and he'll go on these benders, which can even lead into crack binges. It always ends with him crying a...

Lyne · Lyne

When my alanon brain is kicked in I have all the healthy tools I will ever need, to survive the harsh world in good form. When I slip back, which I know will happen from time to time, I wonder how I have made it this long getting thrown around by life and people. I bet that folks that learn from Alanon befo...

neshema2 · neshema2

I have been promising miss pittie/lab a new playmate and I have been wanting a baby again in the house to play with and train and a companion pet for me and for miss pittielab as the old lab that I rescued is not gonna be around that much longer I decided to put my depression over lack of work aside and save a li...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Hi everyone. I have an issue and would like your ESH today. For those that have followed my posts, you know that my AH has been up and down, back and forth in recovery. He is now just about a month sober. I am very proud of him. He is going to AA meetings. His actions have changed, he is more open, more honest, m...

sweeetr · sweeetr

So yesterday evening after my AH worked a 12 hour day. Picked up our mower brought to my daughters house and started mowing. My daughter picked up all the dog stuff outside and waved at him. The ABF and his buddy stayed in the house the full two hours it took to mow 1/2 the yard since he had to mow one high set...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi-So I had a rough couple days with my A, mostly Sun.-Tues. Old hurts came back, obsessive thinking, re-living painful things that were done to me. But I released it in my F2F meeting last night, and somehow today I am not as distraught. But what I realized is that even though I took a step back, I beli...

el-cee · el-cee

I have been popping in and out again after a bit of a break but tonight I read over some of my own old posts from almost 1 year ago. The people on this forum are so special and I had forgot that. When I was low or down or crazy the wise words from the people here really helped me. I have been having a bit of a crisis...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

I know I must make the right choices for myself and my children when the time comes. I am not supposed to worry about what has not yet happened. My gut is telling me though I know my A has not hit rock bottom yet. I will have to stand aside and watch. I ask my HP for strength so that I may be strong enough and wise e...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

This has been a week of surprises I been on the good girl list . I'm appeasing my spouse I been in my new bedroom where I no I belong right now. I trying my best to get thru every day . I'm gonna keep this short . I'm scared . I went out to the book store tonight and was not home when husband came home from work . I did...

debhud · debhud

today is so beautiful outside. thinking about my AS and all of the things we used to do before he become so acutely ill with alcoholism. we used to hang out and laugh so hard. he is one of the funniest people i ever met in my life. and we used to talk and share so much. and go to the lake and have just the bes...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Don't make your waking life and responsibilities so important that you neglect the very real benefits of sleep, rest, and dreaming. The night is your time of restoration. It is essential. God made both day and night for a reason.

pinkchip · pinkchip

My partner was upset yesterday about issues going on at the church. The priest (Episcopal) is getting ready to retire and there's to be a search committee for a new rector. People are jockeying for positions on that search committee. People who already have other important positions in the churc...

Mattie · Mattie

This is a different kind of encounter with an alcoholic/addict than I'm used to. To make a long story short, a workman I hired for one small job insists he wants to work for me on big jobs and is refusing to take no for an answer. I quickly saw that some kind of addiction was at work, I don't know if it's alcoh...

Bettina · Bettina

"In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, And what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself in a crystal clearness. Our life is a long and ardous quest after "Truth". Gandhi

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It only takes a minute to express how I feel these days! I am ecstatic & thrilled to be having days like these. I remember before I even knew what the word meant, I was elated & full of joy! Whatever I have to face from here, I am going to face it head-on w/o fear. I know that it isn't always going to be e...

sweeetr · sweeetr

My daughters live in A. stopped putting money in "their" account to pay bills. She found out yesterday ... which his reply was going to a bar all night. She then blew his phone up with txts. He said he's moving in an apartment. She cant afford the home she bought without help. I wrote her $300...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Yes sir, if it wasn't my story, I would not believe it. I have been seriously thinking that soon I would like to write my autobiography. I am game for it but don't plan on writing it for anyone except myself. I don't mean a 4th step either. I would have to include stuff that have nothing to do w/ the disease of...

Bettina · Bettina

"View your life with "Kindsight". Instead of beating yourself up and asking: "What was I thinking"? Look with loving kindness and ask yourself. "What was I learning "? unk

Bettina · Bettina

Givers Have To Set Limits Because Takers Rarely Do.... Irma Kurtz

islandtime · islandtime

Yesterday I took a long walk, through our woods. I hadn't been back there for quite a while. Nothing better,with the fall crispness in the air, to commune with nature. When I started out, I had an agenda of posting "No hunting" signs, nothing more. But mother nature/ HP sucked me in, and i...

talkinglikerain · talkinglikerain

Hello everyone, I've been lurking on this board for a while. I really appreciate all of the ESH in all of your shares. I am a very grateful member of Al-anon with 4 years in the program, and I attend weekly F2F meetings. I have a sponsor and have been working the steps very slowly but diligently (I seem t...

Beabop910 · Beabop910

My AH has been sober for 5 months. The verbal abuse has stopped which is such a relief. Last night he came home from work and said he wanted to end the marriage. He said he knew I was having an affair and had many online friends. This totally blew my mind. I tried to tell him I was not having an affair and I didn'...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

Just posting here quick so I do not send the man I just split with a message trying to say something that makes him see I'm changing or "you threw the best thing away" or anything that would try to control his response or feelings or actions towards me. I must remember I don't want to try to convi...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Being much more aware of my own thinking in recent times, I've been catching myself doing something really alarming- multiple times each day. I think I've been doing it forever, but I've only just become aware of it. Here's an example. This afternoon, I'm walking in the park with my daughter and dog. I...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning Everyone I just want to let you know my son has taken charge and got himself into a rehab, then has plans for a sober living environment after that. He did it on his own....thank you HP. I took this weekend to let go and take care of me and you know what; he survived. He didn't want to be homeless...

qwerty49 · qwerty49

So I moved to Cornwall from Manchester & decided I'd textd my cousin to ask if she'd look out for mum now i'm here as i know she get upset that she's not included in stuff they do. She was very defensive & said she's 'always' there for my mum, which is bull. Mum & me were stood outside her house on...

Tnika · Tnika

Hi, I've spent a lot of time searching online for a 'cure / solution / fix' for my A. It took a while to realise that in doing that, I was becoming lost to myself in place of what is going on for him. Al-Anon helpline was a help, but having read through some of your posts, I came to realise that some people pos...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	A good breakthrough in boundaries and detachment (Preview) Daughter #2 tried me AGAIN!!! ....I told you all about the "dinner" she stood me up on about 2-3 weeks ago and didn't even apologize for it and that it was something she INSISTED upon....a "mom and daughter dinner" HER idea...And she pulled the head games on me again, ...and h...	neshema2	8	409	Oct 2, 2013 by Ness
	Sober or not, he says I'm never satisfied. (Preview) My BF is an alcoholic/addict. Right now he is using but had a 5 month sober period. He says I'm never happy, even when he was sober he says I was never satisfied. Is this uncommon? I feel as though he may be right....he is drinking and using I'm enraged. If he is sober then I always figure he will mess it up any...	Heronbeach	24	865	Oct 2, 2013 by Raven Juniper
	Hey (Preview) Im a 23 yr old singe mom who grew up with an alcoholic for a mother and an absent father. I was put into the CYS at the age of 12 and stayed there till i was 18. My mother passed away 2 years ago in feb and now i am struggling with more issues than i ever had while she was alive. I am now a 23 yr old single mom who is ha...	lonelygirl101	2	315	Oct 2, 2013 by hotrod
	Signs and Symptoms of Inner Peace (Preview) Be on the lookout for symptoms of inner peace. The hearts of a great many have already been exposed to inner peace and it is possible that people everywhere could come down with it in epidemic proportions. This could pose a serious threat to what has, up to now, been a fairly stable condition of conflict...	Peggy7	7	473	Oct 2, 2013 by grateful2be
	I just can't wrap my head around it (Preview) First thanks for reading as I can't wrap my head around something. Been dating/engaged to a woman on and off for 3 years. She is 44 y/o with Alc and Cocaine Addiction. Been through many treatments. Longest sober is 90 days ( for last 6-7 years). Anyway I have been supporting her, she lived with me till she...	Baffledinva	10	542	Oct 1, 2013 by Peggy7
	Again. (Preview) He never quit drinking, but he cut down a bit or maybe not. I thought I had mastered the step to not nag him about his drinking and I haven't been. Sometimes I cry silently, but say nothing. The problem that I am having a hard time with is his temper. Usually he loses it with me. We use to work as a te...	dori711	10	581	Oct 1, 2013 by Tasha
	thank you all MIP family (Preview) Hi Everyone: Every once in a while, I take a look at the 'diary' of old posts and private messages since HP directed me hear in 2012. It is helpful for me to see where I was, the journey, where things are at now and through all of it....all of you. I wanted to take a few moments to just express gratitude for a...	yanksfan51	10	479	Oct 1, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Dating in the fellowhip (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of the worldwide fellowship of al-anon. There is a young lady that I have befriended in the fellowship that I have began to take an interest in. She is the daughter of another member. We've been talking over the last few weeks and I got her phone...	slogan_jim	16	618	Oct 1, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Neshema, in one of your posts you mentioned that John had a posting on boundaries (Preview) Where can I find that posting? I am great at setting boundaries but maybe not so good at keeping them. I am wondering if it is a learned skill or if I have the wrong idea of what a boundary is. Thanks.	deacon	3	629	Sep 30, 2013 by Mari1978
	Regarding violence: Sept. 29th's Courage to Change (Preview) I thought it important to bring this day's reading up because more often than not, there are members who are under the circumstances of being faced with physical violence. Today's reading is very poignant and I realize for me it must be taken to heart should I find myself under similar circumstances e...	Aloha	5	326	Sep 30, 2013 by neshema2
	FEAR FALSE-EVIDENCE -APPEAR -REAL (Preview) This maybe to soon for me thinking. But as most of you know my son (by choice) admitted himself in a Christian Base Recovery House. I am very proud and support him on his sobriety. We talked today and there I am hearing myself say to him " I have fears " well I can hear his fustration because he say...	Gaby	6	574	Sep 30, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Msg from my HP (Preview) So lately I have been trying to focus on me. Leave it in HP hands. No snooping, no asking questions just moment to moment. Last night I was carrying my 13 month old around at bedtime and my A gave her his cell phone to play with. She was pressing buttons and up popped a fb msg from A to this girl he had an affair w...	Mari1978	7	488	Sep 30, 2013 by Mari1978
	Intense situation, brought back feelings (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Very grateful right now. There was just an incident in my building in which a young man got stuck in an elevator. It was a new elevator that was just put in, and it got stuck. I began to hear some ringing of the emergency bell and some ye...	slogan_jim	10	719	Sep 30, 2013 by RunnerChick
	I did something I hadn't done in 5 years (Preview) Hi Guys I have been pretty grounded this week. Yes I know because my son is safe in rehab but still I think I'm doing OK. So much OK that I had to stop and get my car serviced with a oil change. While I was waiting I get a text from a friend and she asked if I would stop by for a little while. I usually just go ho...	Cathyinaz	11	543	Sep 30, 2013 by Breakingfree
	esh? work situation (Preview) I cross posted this on the other list I'm on so if you see this twice, ignore :) So I have a close friend at work that I trusted, obviously I should not have trusted her..but my higher power puts people in my life to learn a lesson. Long story short, she decided to tell my boss on Friday that I don't do my job wel...	karma13	16	522	Sep 29, 2013 by grateful2be
	An update on my AM (Preview) My AM continues to drink daily. It's an on going battle to sit back and do nothing until she wants to take that 1st Step. I just talked with her and told her how much it hurts us to see her go through this..just existing not really living...how we're here to support her but until she hits her rock bottom and a...	phoenixmagicgirl	1	258	Sep 29, 2013 by Jerry F
	Getting Used To It (Preview) First time posting but long time lurker. I want to thank all the posters here for their shares. It has helped me more than I can say. Last year my husband of 30 years started drinking again after 20, or so, being dry without a program. All the abusive behaviors returned And he started hanging out at th...	Milehi-tlc	7	544	Sep 29, 2013 by grateful2be
	Son is now 125 days sober (Preview) Hi everyone, I have not been on the board for awhile. Retreat week end of July at son's rehab an eye opener. AS is doing good, has returned to his work who paid for rehab (God Bless Them) and enrolled back at the university ( employer pays for that too) and still goes to intensive outpatient 2 nights a week a...	FAITH1988	5	567	Sep 29, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	Learning to not react is like sticking me with a hot rod and expecting me not to move or make a sound! (Preview) Okay so received a text from my alcoholic mother saying 'I'm going to bed now to have a stroke, thanks daughter'.... I had a panic attack & it upset me so much.. & next day i received another text 'If i'm to come to Cornwall I have to come tomorrow, because i have to be back'. I told her i was upset abo...	qwerty49	8	770	Sep 29, 2013 by Jerry F
	Jealousy and envy (Preview) Had an awareness as to what some of my problem was last week. I wasn't feeling right with meetings because my focus got off track. It's so wonderful to have this program because I learn so much more awareness of my own issues and where things stem from, where my unhappiness comes from, and now I'm learn...	ilovedogs	14	1048	Sep 29, 2013 by Melly1248
	it's only a matter of time ` (Preview) You know when it's been quiet, And you are lulled into a false sense of "maybe this isn't so bad", something's gonna hit the fan. So here's last night. I stay in the den at night, have become quite content to be by myself, comfy and cozy. With a kitty or two. On the laptop or watching TV. Th...	islandtime	8	487	Sep 29, 2013 by Melly1248
	Hope is gone... (Preview) This past week I was very happy to start back at square one. I truly understand now that I need to focus on myself and my own recovery. The last 2 months have been hell, even worse than all the months leading up to this past July. The reason I feel this way is that I've finally had to swallow the knots in my thro...	Raven Juniper	10	537	Sep 29, 2013 by Raven Juniper
	grateful (Preview) It's been 4 months now since I have seen my alcoholic ex-bf, that was violent toward me. He remains in jail for abusing me. I am today, so grateful to be free of the insanity. I am now living alone and loving each day and I feel no sense of lonlyiness. Is that normal? I do not feel the need for another relation...	joker	5	385	Sep 29, 2013 by Jerry F
	A LOVING and AWESOME amend (Preview) I had the greatest talk w/my cousin who is my favorite of all relatives....she rates up there , maybe even more than my A brothers whom I love.........She and I grew up together....the respite i got from my hell was at her house w/her parents....we are fraternal cousins and very close in age.... we play...	neshema2	4	435	Sep 29, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	bewildered newbie, help please? (Preview) Hi there I am new to this board, so I hope it's ok if I just jump in. My husband is currently passed out in our bed. He phoned me after work and asked me to come and meet him downtown... I did, and he was sitting at a bus stop, pretty drunk, and looking so sad it broke my heart. I managed to drag him home (the most mo...	NoTactician	11	542	Sep 28, 2013 by neshema2
	Need help in understanding my wifes lack of love and desire to leave marriage (Preview) I have been sober for 6 months, 14 days, 23 1/2 hours and feel I have listened to every aspect of what I did not achieve in the marriage prior to my dry date. I have and continue addressing each aspect and have made changes and advancement in each category and there have been times when things seemed to be...	gofred123	16	833	Sep 28, 2013 by Ms S
	rain might ruin the cruise! (Preview) I am frustrated a bit. Actually this time of year we have our annual Al anon speaker cruise on the lake. It is a boat that has a lot of space below. I guess I might be over-reacting a bit. I am just under a little stress. I couldn't find the shoes I was looking for to wear today. I guess I am being a bit silly about...	Hoot Nanny	1	315	Sep 28, 2013 by Bettina
	This is taking a toll on me (Preview) I last had contact with my son on Monday via text. He said he was doing good and that maybe we could have lunch the following day. Per his words, it would finally be his treat. Well he didn't call on Tuesday and I haven't heard from him since. I sent him a text today...no response. He either relapsed again or...	Rose50	17	743	Sep 28, 2013 by Rose50
	Dealing with alcohol/crack addiction (Preview) My boyfriend is smart, well educated, and a crack addict. How do I deal with this? He moved out two weeks ago, got his own place and has been on a couple benders since. He will drink and automatically want to get high. I feel like I don't even know this person who goes downtown Seattle to buy crack from shady...	Heronbeach	4	1240	Sep 28, 2013 by neshema2
	Son issues continued (Preview) I have messed up once again concerning my son and I's relationship. To recap - I asked my 20yr old son to leave the home on February this year which he did do - fast forward past the fear, worry, guilt then acceptance, a bit of peace and building bridges (mixed with a bit of enabling). During the summer I le...	el-cee	15	427	Sep 27, 2013 by grateful2be
	12 Steps of Pre-Programme (Preview) 1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing - that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us. 2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and the rest of the world was insane. 3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills a...	Ness	12	587	Sep 27, 2013 by qwerty49
	alanon brain con't (Preview) A really cool thing about my alanon brain is that there is a link I can click on that takes me right to HP! Have a great day everyone, Lyne	Lyne	2	266	Sep 27, 2013 by hotrod
	Hard time accepting my mother for who she is. (Preview) I have shared on here before about my relationship with my mother. My mother is an untreated Adult child of an Alcoholic. My husband and I with our 3 year old son are currently living back at my parents place and hope to purchase our first home together in the New year. I am grateful for my parents for allow...	sportychick	6	484	Sep 27, 2013 by qwerty49
	Going through a lot of grief right now. (Preview) I have broken up with my boyfriend of about a year and a half. The breakup was mutual, but hard for both us. He is an alcoholic/addict. He will be sober for certain amounts of time, then it all goes downhill and he'll go on these benders, which can even lead into crack binges. It always ends with him crying a...	Heronbeach	6	590	Sep 27, 2013 by grateful2be
	I love my alanon brain (Preview) When my alanon brain is kicked in I have all the healthy tools I will ever need, to survive the harsh world in good form. When I slip back, which I know will happen from time to time, I wonder how I have made it this long getting thrown around by life and people. I bet that folks that learn from Alanon befo...	Lyne	3	399	Sep 27, 2013 by Jerry F
	NEW BABY (Preview) I have been promising miss pittie/lab a new playmate and I have been wanting a baby again in the house to play with and train and a companion pet for me and for miss pittielab as the old lab that I rescued is not gonna be around that much longer I decided to put my depression over lack of work aside and save a li...	neshema2	10	363	Sep 27, 2013 by neshema2
	Dealing with Alcohol at Work (Preview) Hi everyone. I have an issue and would like your ESH today. For those that have followed my posts, you know that my AH has been up and down, back and forth in recovery. He is now just about a month sober. I am very proud of him. He is going to AA meetings. His actions have changed, he is more open, more honest, m...	ParisMemories	3	448	Sep 27, 2013 by hotrod
	Re: mom protection part 2 (Preview) So yesterday evening after my AH worked a 12 hour day. Picked up our mower brought to my daughters house and started mowing. My daughter picked up all the dog stuff outside and waved at him. The ABF and his buddy stayed in the house the full two hours it took to mow 1/2 the yard since he had to mow one high set...	sweeetr	6	822	Sep 26, 2013 by sweeetr
	keeping the faith (Preview) Hi-So I had a rough couple days with my A, mostly Sun.-Tues. Old hurts came back, obsessive thinking, re-living painful things that were done to me. But I released it in my F2F meeting last night, and somehow today I am not as distraught. But what I realized is that even though I took a step back, I beli...	Lyne	5	294	Sep 26, 2013 by el-cee
	Forgot what a great place this is!! (Preview) I have been popping in and out again after a bit of a break but tonight I read over some of my own old posts from almost 1 year ago. The people on this forum are so special and I had forgot that. When I was low or down or crazy the wise words from the people here really helped me. I have been having a bit of a crisis...	el-cee	9	475	Sep 25, 2013 by el-cee
	Realization (Preview) I know I must make the right choices for myself and my children when the time comes. I am not supposed to worry about what has not yet happened. My gut is telling me though I know my A has not hit rock bottom yet. I will have to stand aside and watch. I ask my HP for strength so that I may be strong enough and wise e...	Mari1978	3	457	Sep 25, 2013 by hotrod
	Something's wrong I sense it (Preview) This has been a week of surprises I been on the good girl list . I'm appeasing my spouse I been in my new bedroom where I no I belong right now. I trying my best to get thru every day . I'm gonna keep this short . I'm scared . I went out to the book store tonight and was not home when husband came home from work . I did...	Ms co-dependent	8	578	Sep 25, 2013 by Tasha
	i MISS my son! (Preview) today is so beautiful outside. thinking about my AS and all of the things we used to do before he become so acutely ill with alcoholism. we used to hang out and laugh so hard. he is one of the funniest people i ever met in my life. and we used to talk and share so much. and go to the lake and have just the bes...	debhud	7	536	Sep 25, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Message from God (Preview) Don't make your waking life and responsibilities so important that you neglect the very real benefits of sleep, rest, and dreaming. The night is your time of restoration. It is essential. God made both day and night for a reason.	Cathyinaz	7	614	Sep 25, 2013 by hotrod
	Alanon on the brain (Preview) My partner was upset yesterday about issues going on at the church. The priest (Episcopal) is getting ready to retire and there's to be a search committee for a new rector. People are jockeying for positions on that search committee. People who already have other important positions in the churc...	pinkchip	11	721	Sep 25, 2013 by Tasha
	Where to get help? (Preview) This is a different kind of encounter with an alcoholic/addict than I'm used to. To make a long story short, a workman I hired for one small job insists he wants to work for me on big jobs and is refusing to take no for an answer. I quickly saw that some kind of addiction was at work, I don't know if it's alcoh...	Mattie	7	501	Sep 25, 2013 by neshema2
	"Reflections" (Preview) "In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, And what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself in a crystal clearness. Our life is a long and ardous quest after "Truth". Gandhi	Bettina	2	363	Sep 25, 2013 by neshema2
	it only takes a minute! (Preview) It only takes a minute to express how I feel these days! I am ecstatic & thrilled to be having days like these. I remember before I even knew what the word meant, I was elated & full of joy! Whatever I have to face from here, I am going to face it head-on w/o fear. I know that it isn't always going to be e...	Hoot Nanny	3	282	Sep 25, 2013 by hotrod
	turning off mom protection mode (Preview) My daughters live in A. stopped putting money in "their" account to pay bills. She found out yesterday ... which his reply was going to a bar all night. She then blew his phone up with txts. He said he's moving in an apartment. She cant afford the home she bought without help. I wrote her $300...	sweeetr	2	471	Sep 25, 2013 by PP
	if it wasn't my story, I wouldn't believe it! (Preview) Yes sir, if it wasn't my story, I would not believe it. I have been seriously thinking that soon I would like to write my autobiography. I am game for it but don't plan on writing it for anyone except myself. I don't mean a 4th step either. I would have to include stuff that have nothing to do w/ the disease of...	Hoot Nanny	2	633	Sep 25, 2013 by Bettina
	"KINDSIGHT" (Preview) "View your life with "Kindsight". Instead of beating yourself up and asking: "What was I thinking"? Look with loving kindness and ask yourself. "What was I learning "? unk	Bettina	8	383	Sep 24, 2013 by talkinglikerain
	Ponder this! (Preview) Givers Have To Set Limits Because Takers Rarely Do.... Irma Kurtz	Bettina	7	444	Sep 24, 2013 by Momworrys
	A walk in the woods (Preview) Yesterday I took a long walk, through our woods. I hadn't been back there for quite a while. Nothing better,with the fall crispness in the air, to commune with nature. When I started out, I had an agenda of posting "No hunting" signs, nothing more. But mother nature/ HP sucked me in, and i...	islandtime	6	409	Sep 24, 2013 by islandtime
	Relationship changes as result of Alanon recovery (Preview) Hello everyone, I've been lurking on this board for a while. I really appreciate all of the ESH in all of your shares. I am a very grateful member of Al-anon with 4 years in the program, and I attend weekly F2F meetings. I have a sponsor and have been working the steps very slowly but diligently (I seem t...	talkinglikerain	7	708	Sep 24, 2013 by abbyal
	AH 5 months sober and wants to separate (Preview) My AH has been sober for 5 months. The verbal abuse has stopped which is such a relief. Last night he came home from work and said he wanted to end the marriage. He said he knew I was having an affair and had many online friends. This totally blew my mind. I tried to tell him I was not having an affair and I didn'...	Beabop910	14	2161	Sep 24, 2013 by abbyal
	Letting It Go (Preview) Just posting here quick so I do not send the man I just split with a message trying to say something that makes him see I'm changing or "you threw the best thing away" or anything that would try to control his response or feelings or actions towards me. I must remember I don't want to try to convi...	RunnerChick	10	552	Sep 24, 2013 by diamond
	How long have I been doing this to myself? (Preview) Being much more aware of my own thinking in recent times, I've been catching myself doing something really alarming- multiple times each day. I think I've been doing it forever, but I've only just become aware of it. Here's an example. This afternoon, I'm walking in the park with my daughter and dog. I...	Melly1248	16	586	Sep 24, 2013 by PP
	My son took charge (Preview) Good Morning Everyone I just want to let you know my son has taken charge and got himself into a rehab, then has plans for a sober living environment after that. He did it on his own....thank you HP. I took this weekend to let go and take care of me and you know what; he survived. He didn't want to be homeless...	Cathyinaz	16	663	Sep 24, 2013 by ilovedogs
	I finally moved & have more a voice to my alcoholic mothers famiyl all of a sudden :) (Preview) So I moved to Cornwall from Manchester & decided I'd textd my cousin to ask if she'd look out for mum now i'm here as i know she get upset that she's not included in stuff they do. She was very defensive & said she's 'always' there for my mum, which is bull. Mum & me were stood outside her house on...	qwerty49	4	306	Sep 24, 2013 by grateful2be
	I'm new here... It seems I found what I was searching for (Preview) Hi, I've spent a lot of time searching online for a 'cure / solution / fix' for my A. It took a while to realise that in doing that, I was becoming lost to myself in place of what is going on for him. Al-Anon helpline was a help, but having read through some of your posts, I came to realise that some people pos...	Tnika	8	630	Sep 24, 2013 by Cathyinaz
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.