Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

NoTactician · NoTactician

Hi there I am new to this board, so I hope it's ok if I just jump in. My husband is currently passed out in our bed. He phoned me after work and asked me to come and meet him downtown... I did, and he was sitting at a bus stop, pretty drunk, and looking so sad it broke my heart. I managed to drag him home (the most mo...

gofred123 · gofred123

I have been sober for 6 months, 14 days, 23 1/2 hours and feel I have listened to every aspect of what I did not achieve in the marriage prior to my dry date. I have and continue addressing each aspect and have made changes and advancement in each category and there have been times when things seemed to be...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am frustrated a bit. Actually this time of year we have our annual Al anon speaker cruise on the lake. It is a boat that has a lot of space below. I guess I might be over-reacting a bit. I am just under a little stress. I couldn't find the shoes I was looking for to wear today. I guess I am being a bit silly about...

Rose50 · Rose50

I last had contact with my son on Monday via text. He said he was doing good and that maybe we could have lunch the following day. Per his words, it would finally be his treat. Well he didn't call on Tuesday and I haven't heard from him since. I sent him a text today...no response. He either relapsed again or...

Heronbeach · Heronbeach

My boyfriend is smart, well educated, and a crack addict. How do I deal with this? He moved out two weeks ago, got his own place and has been on a couple benders since. He will drink and automatically want to get high. I feel like I don't even know this person who goes downtown Seattle to buy crack from shady...

el-cee · el-cee

I have messed up once again concerning my son and I's relationship. To recap - I asked my 20yr old son to leave the home on February this year which he did do - fast forward past the fear, worry, guilt then acceptance, a bit of peace and building bridges (mixed with a bit of enabling). During the summer I le...

Ness · Ness

1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing - that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us. 2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and the rest of the world was insane. 3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills a...

Lyne · Lyne

A really cool thing about my alanon brain is that there is a link I can click on that takes me right to HP! Have a great day everyone, Lyne

sportychick · sportychick

I have shared on here before about my relationship with my mother. My mother is an untreated Adult child of an Alcoholic. My husband and I with our 3 year old son are currently living back at my parents place and hope to purchase our first home together in the New year. I am grateful for my parents for allow...

Heronbeach · Heronbeach

I have broken up with my boyfriend of about a year and a half. The breakup was mutual, but hard for both us. He is an alcoholic/addict. He will be sober for certain amounts of time, then it all goes downhill and he'll go on these benders, which can even lead into crack binges. It always ends with him crying a...

Lyne · Lyne

When my alanon brain is kicked in I have all the healthy tools I will ever need, to survive the harsh world in good form. When I slip back, which I know will happen from time to time, I wonder how I have made it this long getting thrown around by life and people. I bet that folks that learn from Alanon befo...

neshema2 · neshema2

I have been promising miss pittie/lab a new playmate and I have been wanting a baby again in the house to play with and train and a companion pet for me and for miss pittielab as the old lab that I rescued is not gonna be around that much longer I decided to put my depression over lack of work aside and save a li...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Hi everyone. I have an issue and would like your ESH today. For those that have followed my posts, you know that my AH has been up and down, back and forth in recovery. He is now just about a month sober. I am very proud of him. He is going to AA meetings. His actions have changed, he is more open, more honest, m...

sweeetr · sweeetr

So yesterday evening after my AH worked a 12 hour day. Picked up our mower brought to my daughters house and started mowing. My daughter picked up all the dog stuff outside and waved at him. The ABF and his buddy stayed in the house the full two hours it took to mow 1/2 the yard since he had to mow one high set...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi-So I had a rough couple days with my A, mostly Sun.-Tues. Old hurts came back, obsessive thinking, re-living painful things that were done to me. But I released it in my F2F meeting last night, and somehow today I am not as distraught. But what I realized is that even though I took a step back, I beli...

el-cee · el-cee

I have been popping in and out again after a bit of a break but tonight I read over some of my own old posts from almost 1 year ago. The people on this forum are so special and I had forgot that. When I was low or down or crazy the wise words from the people here really helped me. I have been having a bit of a crisis...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

I know I must make the right choices for myself and my children when the time comes. I am not supposed to worry about what has not yet happened. My gut is telling me though I know my A has not hit rock bottom yet. I will have to stand aside and watch. I ask my HP for strength so that I may be strong enough and wise e...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

This has been a week of surprises I been on the good girl list . I'm appeasing my spouse I been in my new bedroom where I no I belong right now. I trying my best to get thru every day . I'm gonna keep this short . I'm scared . I went out to the book store tonight and was not home when husband came home from work . I did...

debhud · debhud

today is so beautiful outside. thinking about my AS and all of the things we used to do before he become so acutely ill with alcoholism. we used to hang out and laugh so hard. he is one of the funniest people i ever met in my life. and we used to talk and share so much. and go to the lake and have just the bes...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Don't make your waking life and responsibilities so important that you neglect the very real benefits of sleep, rest, and dreaming. The night is your time of restoration. It is essential. God made both day and night for a reason.

pinkchip · pinkchip

My partner was upset yesterday about issues going on at the church. The priest (Episcopal) is getting ready to retire and there's to be a search committee for a new rector. People are jockeying for positions on that search committee. People who already have other important positions in the churc...

Mattie · Mattie

This is a different kind of encounter with an alcoholic/addict than I'm used to. To make a long story short, a workman I hired for one small job insists he wants to work for me on big jobs and is refusing to take no for an answer. I quickly saw that some kind of addiction was at work, I don't know if it's alcoh...

Bettina · Bettina

"In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, And what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself in a crystal clearness. Our life is a long and ardous quest after "Truth". Gandhi

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It only takes a minute to express how I feel these days! I am ecstatic & thrilled to be having days like these. I remember before I even knew what the word meant, I was elated & full of joy! Whatever I have to face from here, I am going to face it head-on w/o fear. I know that it isn't always going to be e...

sweeetr · sweeetr

My daughters live in A. stopped putting money in "their" account to pay bills. She found out yesterday ... which his reply was going to a bar all night. She then blew his phone up with txts. He said he's moving in an apartment. She cant afford the home she bought without help. I wrote her $300...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Yes sir, if it wasn't my story, I would not believe it. I have been seriously thinking that soon I would like to write my autobiography. I am game for it but don't plan on writing it for anyone except myself. I don't mean a 4th step either. I would have to include stuff that have nothing to do w/ the disease of...

Bettina · Bettina

"View your life with "Kindsight". Instead of beating yourself up and asking: "What was I thinking"? Look with loving kindness and ask yourself. "What was I learning "? unk

Bettina · Bettina

Givers Have To Set Limits Because Takers Rarely Do.... Irma Kurtz

islandtime · islandtime

Yesterday I took a long walk, through our woods. I hadn't been back there for quite a while. Nothing better,with the fall crispness in the air, to commune with nature. When I started out, I had an agenda of posting "No hunting" signs, nothing more. But mother nature/ HP sucked me in, and i...

talkinglikerain · talkinglikerain

Hello everyone, I've been lurking on this board for a while. I really appreciate all of the ESH in all of your shares. I am a very grateful member of Al-anon with 4 years in the program, and I attend weekly F2F meetings. I have a sponsor and have been working the steps very slowly but diligently (I seem t...

Beabop910 · Beabop910

My AH has been sober for 5 months. The verbal abuse has stopped which is such a relief. Last night he came home from work and said he wanted to end the marriage. He said he knew I was having an affair and had many online friends. This totally blew my mind. I tried to tell him I was not having an affair and I didn'...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

Just posting here quick so I do not send the man I just split with a message trying to say something that makes him see I'm changing or "you threw the best thing away" or anything that would try to control his response or feelings or actions towards me. I must remember I don't want to try to convi...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Being much more aware of my own thinking in recent times, I've been catching myself doing something really alarming- multiple times each day. I think I've been doing it forever, but I've only just become aware of it. Here's an example. This afternoon, I'm walking in the park with my daughter and dog. I...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning Everyone I just want to let you know my son has taken charge and got himself into a rehab, then has plans for a sober living environment after that. He did it on his own....thank you HP. I took this weekend to let go and take care of me and you know what; he survived. He didn't want to be homeless...

qwerty49 · qwerty49

So I moved to Cornwall from Manchester & decided I'd textd my cousin to ask if she'd look out for mum now i'm here as i know she get upset that she's not included in stuff they do. She was very defensive & said she's 'always' there for my mum, which is bull. Mum & me were stood outside her house on...

Tnika · Tnika

Hi, I've spent a lot of time searching online for a 'cure / solution / fix' for my A. It took a while to realise that in doing that, I was becoming lost to myself in place of what is going on for him. Al-Anon helpline was a help, but having read through some of your posts, I came to realise that some people pos...

Marko · Marko

Since I was child I always experience of getting bullied off my childhood neighbors and also in school. I've seen my parents are always fighting each other. Maybe because my father is alcoholic. I remember the time I was walking home crying because of my cruel neighbors. They always called me gay but...

neshema2 · neshema2

Hi everyone Thank you souls who took the time to wish me a happy birthday....if this were facebook I would have clicked a BIG like after each one and I read ALL of them... Actually it meant you all are glad that I was "hatched" and I appreciate it Had a nice day yesterday....my D#1 sent me a beau...

Jacquiej · Jacquiej

My A is my husband. We have been married for 20 years and together for 25... since I was 15. We have been struggling with this for about two years this time. He had trouble about 8 years ago but got sober and stayed sober for about 6 years. This time is different... he won't get help even though he says...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Hi guys, I'm a bit frustrated at the moment. I have been going to a minimum of 2 meetings a week. I have a scheduled time to call my sponsor weekly and I have a few other program friends whom I chat with every so often during the week. My biggest issue is that I don't feel connected to my sponsor. This past...

islandtime · islandtime

I had a light bulb moment...expectations are what has led to my sadness, dissapointment,ect, ect. My expectations were what anyone elses would be. In my marriage, I expected to..... be loved enjoy each others company be nurtured to ha...

neshema2 · neshema2

I am gonna do some fun stuff.......NO recovery work for Sunday....Its my Birthday, now at 3am, I am still up from watching good movies. Going to go to sleep now and later???? HAVE FUN.....maybe I'll go browse the books at goodwill....OR play on my new "jump ball" where I straddle this big...

tortuga · tortuga

hello all old-timers, I am seeking for advice. My parents are in town. And alcohol runs in our family, it's a long time history. Not all binge drinkers, but alcohol has always been omnipresent. So for me it has become obvious it is creating problems, where if it would be absent, life could have been nice...

luv123 · luv123

Thought I would share a cool meeting idea with my recovery pals: Today I went to a great special 3 hr. workshop Al-anon meeting on intimacy. It had so many well thought through ideas and a panel of people with very differing intimacy situations just answering questions out of their own experience--...

Bettina · Bettina

"It is wrong and immoral for a nation to supply intoxicating liquor to those who are addicted to drink ". Gandhi (10/2/1869-1/30/48) -- Edited by Bettina on Saturday 21st of September 2013 09:02:04 PM -- Edited by Bettina on Sunday 22nd of September 2013 12:34:55 AM

Melly1248 · Melly1248

One thing that's been hitting the "hurt" button with me is reading posts from people talking about their A as their "best friend" who has been "lost" to them. 'Cause my A used to be my best friend too, but I don't think about that anymore. It's been so long since there wa...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I have noticed my program tools slipping with me basically living at school now and working the weekends. I have had to let house work go and am not able to make it to my Tuesday evening meetings or find time to do much else except school work. I am doing good in school, but they said this program was intense...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. I have mentioned in the past that I decided to foster a cat so that I could give pet ownership a try and give me some company. They offered me a cat that had been poisoned by his previous owner and he started experiencing seizures. I br...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

Hi I'm not in my head or in my body I don't no where I am . My home is now a house of secrets the doors are closed and whispering begins . I have broke down my walls and busted my bubble I am open to all around me to gain access to . I'm scared my confusion has taking over me. I pray that my break down does not have my hu...

Sun sun · Sun sun

Hi everyone i have posted here a couple of times and find myself frequently seeking comfort and learning on these pages. So here I am again, and that can only mean there's been yet another drama with the ABH. Promises, promises. All broken. I kicked him out of the house a month ago after his abuse went b...

tortuga · tortuga

I am currently understanding 'taking care of ME' by observing very strictly anti-HALT

Hungry- I find pleasure in cooking and selecting healthy food--- my body seems to absorb this thankfully, I feel energetic and enjoy the cooking process...gives me creative ME time Angry- I'm tired to be angr...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi MIP Family. Here is a small laugh for the day. My partner and I went to Jones Beach today to walk the beach, have lunch and feed the seagulls We purchased a .99 cent package of hot dogs from the Supermarket for the gulls and went to Subways and purchased a $5,00 Foot Long to share. We arrived at the b...

Christine · Christine

So my significant other was dry for a year with the help of antibuse (which he understood would make him violently ill) he made the decision to go off the meds and try drinking socially again. We have had so much go wrong in our year and a half relationship, a house shooting, a major flood, custody battle...

Lyne · Lyne

So yesterday and today I have experienced minor setbacks with my A. I'm not yelling at myself because I know I am making progress overall. But the setbacks did take me by surprise. Yesterday maybe we didn't communicate well. When I thought she would be coming home was not when she came home. She sa...

neshema2 · neshema2

Today, Saturday was the last day that the gal at the front desk worked.... We have quite a history...She came to work a year after I...At first it was "ok" then one day we were facebooking , chatting and she is AT WORK...doing this on company times...I was at home...I realized this and told h...

Pushka · Pushka

I'm a huge offender in that area ESPECIALLY when I started making a conscious decision about getting a divorce .. I got my hands on every single piece of paperwork I could get and started filing everything down. In my mind THAT is not snooping that is being proactive and thank goodness I was because he h...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Maybe my thinking is off on this, but I find myself no longer caring if working my program makes a difference for somebody else? Although I do want to carry the message, the results of that carrying of it simply doesn't interest me as much as it once did. What's more important to me is whether or not work...

Lyne · Lyne

A new member came to my F2F meeting and I saw myself-scared, not knowing what to expect, not knowing the prayer we say together or the format. I felt relief and gratitude after my first meeting and I hope she did too. A few of us spoke to her afterwards (myself included) and a man gave her the newcomer pa...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Enjoy!!

Melly1248 · Melly1248

So, I took a deep breath, and adjusted my thinking as best I could. See, before I wrote that last post, I made a little plea to the A- just a little one- I said "I'm really struggling with the isolation and loneliness at the moment, do you think you could make an effort to be friendly and speak nicely to...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	bewildered newbie, help please? (Preview) Hi there I am new to this board, so I hope it's ok if I just jump in. My husband is currently passed out in our bed. He phoned me after work and asked me to come and meet him downtown... I did, and he was sitting at a bus stop, pretty drunk, and looking so sad it broke my heart. I managed to drag him home (the most mo...	NoTactician	11	487	Sep 28, 2013 by neshema2
	Need help in understanding my wifes lack of love and desire to leave marriage (Preview) I have been sober for 6 months, 14 days, 23 1/2 hours and feel I have listened to every aspect of what I did not achieve in the marriage prior to my dry date. I have and continue addressing each aspect and have made changes and advancement in each category and there have been times when things seemed to be...	gofred123	16	778	Sep 28, 2013 by Ms S
	rain might ruin the cruise! (Preview) I am frustrated a bit. Actually this time of year we have our annual Al anon speaker cruise on the lake. It is a boat that has a lot of space below. I guess I might be over-reacting a bit. I am just under a little stress. I couldn't find the shoes I was looking for to wear today. I guess I am being a bit silly about...	Hoot Nanny	1	258	Sep 28, 2013 by Bettina
	This is taking a toll on me (Preview) I last had contact with my son on Monday via text. He said he was doing good and that maybe we could have lunch the following day. Per his words, it would finally be his treat. Well he didn't call on Tuesday and I haven't heard from him since. I sent him a text today...no response. He either relapsed again or...	Rose50	17	689	Sep 28, 2013 by Rose50
	Dealing with alcohol/crack addiction (Preview) My boyfriend is smart, well educated, and a crack addict. How do I deal with this? He moved out two weeks ago, got his own place and has been on a couple benders since. He will drink and automatically want to get high. I feel like I don't even know this person who goes downtown Seattle to buy crack from shady...	Heronbeach	4	1178	Sep 28, 2013 by neshema2
	Son issues continued (Preview) I have messed up once again concerning my son and I's relationship. To recap - I asked my 20yr old son to leave the home on February this year which he did do - fast forward past the fear, worry, guilt then acceptance, a bit of peace and building bridges (mixed with a bit of enabling). During the summer I le...	el-cee	15	374	Sep 27, 2013 by grateful2be
	12 Steps of Pre-Programme (Preview) 1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing - that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us. 2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and the rest of the world was insane. 3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills a...	Ness	12	530	Sep 27, 2013 by qwerty49
	alanon brain con't (Preview) A really cool thing about my alanon brain is that there is a link I can click on that takes me right to HP! Have a great day everyone, Lyne	Lyne	2	211	Sep 27, 2013 by hotrod
	Hard time accepting my mother for who she is. (Preview) I have shared on here before about my relationship with my mother. My mother is an untreated Adult child of an Alcoholic. My husband and I with our 3 year old son are currently living back at my parents place and hope to purchase our first home together in the New year. I am grateful for my parents for allow...	sportychick	6	432	Sep 27, 2013 by qwerty49
	Going through a lot of grief right now. (Preview) I have broken up with my boyfriend of about a year and a half. The breakup was mutual, but hard for both us. He is an alcoholic/addict. He will be sober for certain amounts of time, then it all goes downhill and he'll go on these benders, which can even lead into crack binges. It always ends with him crying a...	Heronbeach	6	537	Sep 27, 2013 by grateful2be
	I love my alanon brain (Preview) When my alanon brain is kicked in I have all the healthy tools I will ever need, to survive the harsh world in good form. When I slip back, which I know will happen from time to time, I wonder how I have made it this long getting thrown around by life and people. I bet that folks that learn from Alanon befo...	Lyne	3	346	Sep 27, 2013 by Jerry F
	NEW BABY (Preview) I have been promising miss pittie/lab a new playmate and I have been wanting a baby again in the house to play with and train and a companion pet for me and for miss pittielab as the old lab that I rescued is not gonna be around that much longer I decided to put my depression over lack of work aside and save a li...	neshema2	10	306	Sep 27, 2013 by neshema2
	Dealing with Alcohol at Work (Preview) Hi everyone. I have an issue and would like your ESH today. For those that have followed my posts, you know that my AH has been up and down, back and forth in recovery. He is now just about a month sober. I am very proud of him. He is going to AA meetings. His actions have changed, he is more open, more honest, m...	ParisMemories	3	392	Sep 27, 2013 by hotrod
	Re: mom protection part 2 (Preview) So yesterday evening after my AH worked a 12 hour day. Picked up our mower brought to my daughters house and started mowing. My daughter picked up all the dog stuff outside and waved at him. The ABF and his buddy stayed in the house the full two hours it took to mow 1/2 the yard since he had to mow one high set...	sweeetr	6	739	Sep 26, 2013 by sweeetr
	keeping the faith (Preview) Hi-So I had a rough couple days with my A, mostly Sun.-Tues. Old hurts came back, obsessive thinking, re-living painful things that were done to me. But I released it in my F2F meeting last night, and somehow today I am not as distraught. But what I realized is that even though I took a step back, I beli...	Lyne	5	241	Sep 26, 2013 by el-cee
	Forgot what a great place this is!! (Preview) I have been popping in and out again after a bit of a break but tonight I read over some of my own old posts from almost 1 year ago. The people on this forum are so special and I had forgot that. When I was low or down or crazy the wise words from the people here really helped me. I have been having a bit of a crisis...	el-cee	9	416	Sep 25, 2013 by el-cee
	Realization (Preview) I know I must make the right choices for myself and my children when the time comes. I am not supposed to worry about what has not yet happened. My gut is telling me though I know my A has not hit rock bottom yet. I will have to stand aside and watch. I ask my HP for strength so that I may be strong enough and wise e...	Mari1978	3	404	Sep 25, 2013 by hotrod
	Something's wrong I sense it (Preview) This has been a week of surprises I been on the good girl list . I'm appeasing my spouse I been in my new bedroom where I no I belong right now. I trying my best to get thru every day . I'm gonna keep this short . I'm scared . I went out to the book store tonight and was not home when husband came home from work . I did...	Ms co-dependent	8	523	Sep 25, 2013 by Tasha
	i MISS my son! (Preview) today is so beautiful outside. thinking about my AS and all of the things we used to do before he become so acutely ill with alcoholism. we used to hang out and laugh so hard. he is one of the funniest people i ever met in my life. and we used to talk and share so much. and go to the lake and have just the bes...	debhud	7	479	Sep 25, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Message from God (Preview) Don't make your waking life and responsibilities so important that you neglect the very real benefits of sleep, rest, and dreaming. The night is your time of restoration. It is essential. God made both day and night for a reason.	Cathyinaz	7	560	Sep 25, 2013 by hotrod
	Alanon on the brain (Preview) My partner was upset yesterday about issues going on at the church. The priest (Episcopal) is getting ready to retire and there's to be a search committee for a new rector. People are jockeying for positions on that search committee. People who already have other important positions in the churc...	pinkchip	11	655	Sep 25, 2013 by Tasha
	Where to get help? (Preview) This is a different kind of encounter with an alcoholic/addict than I'm used to. To make a long story short, a workman I hired for one small job insists he wants to work for me on big jobs and is refusing to take no for an answer. I quickly saw that some kind of addiction was at work, I don't know if it's alcoh...	Mattie	7	443	Sep 25, 2013 by neshema2
	"Reflections" (Preview) "In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, And what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself in a crystal clearness. Our life is a long and ardous quest after "Truth". Gandhi	Bettina	2	311	Sep 25, 2013 by neshema2
	it only takes a minute! (Preview) It only takes a minute to express how I feel these days! I am ecstatic & thrilled to be having days like these. I remember before I even knew what the word meant, I was elated & full of joy! Whatever I have to face from here, I am going to face it head-on w/o fear. I know that it isn't always going to be e...	Hoot Nanny	3	228	Sep 25, 2013 by hotrod
	turning off mom protection mode (Preview) My daughters live in A. stopped putting money in "their" account to pay bills. She found out yesterday ... which his reply was going to a bar all night. She then blew his phone up with txts. He said he's moving in an apartment. She cant afford the home she bought without help. I wrote her $300...	sweeetr	2	408	Sep 25, 2013 by PP
	if it wasn't my story, I wouldn't believe it! (Preview) Yes sir, if it wasn't my story, I would not believe it. I have been seriously thinking that soon I would like to write my autobiography. I am game for it but don't plan on writing it for anyone except myself. I don't mean a 4th step either. I would have to include stuff that have nothing to do w/ the disease of...	Hoot Nanny	2	577	Sep 25, 2013 by Bettina
	"KINDSIGHT" (Preview) "View your life with "Kindsight". Instead of beating yourself up and asking: "What was I thinking"? Look with loving kindness and ask yourself. "What was I learning "? unk	Bettina	8	331	Sep 24, 2013 by talkinglikerain
	Ponder this! (Preview) Givers Have To Set Limits Because Takers Rarely Do.... Irma Kurtz	Bettina	7	391	Sep 24, 2013 by Momworrys
	A walk in the woods (Preview) Yesterday I took a long walk, through our woods. I hadn't been back there for quite a while. Nothing better,with the fall crispness in the air, to commune with nature. When I started out, I had an agenda of posting "No hunting" signs, nothing more. But mother nature/ HP sucked me in, and i...	islandtime	6	356	Sep 24, 2013 by islandtime
	Relationship changes as result of Alanon recovery (Preview) Hello everyone, I've been lurking on this board for a while. I really appreciate all of the ESH in all of your shares. I am a very grateful member of Al-anon with 4 years in the program, and I attend weekly F2F meetings. I have a sponsor and have been working the steps very slowly but diligently (I seem t...	talkinglikerain	7	654	Sep 24, 2013 by abbyal
	AH 5 months sober and wants to separate (Preview) My AH has been sober for 5 months. The verbal abuse has stopped which is such a relief. Last night he came home from work and said he wanted to end the marriage. He said he knew I was having an affair and had many online friends. This totally blew my mind. I tried to tell him I was not having an affair and I didn'...	Beabop910	14	1990	Sep 24, 2013 by abbyal
	Letting It Go (Preview) Just posting here quick so I do not send the man I just split with a message trying to say something that makes him see I'm changing or "you threw the best thing away" or anything that would try to control his response or feelings or actions towards me. I must remember I don't want to try to convi...	RunnerChick	10	500	Sep 24, 2013 by diamond
	How long have I been doing this to myself? (Preview) Being much more aware of my own thinking in recent times, I've been catching myself doing something really alarming- multiple times each day. I think I've been doing it forever, but I've only just become aware of it. Here's an example. This afternoon, I'm walking in the park with my daughter and dog. I...	Melly1248	16	527	Sep 24, 2013 by PP
	My son took charge (Preview) Good Morning Everyone I just want to let you know my son has taken charge and got himself into a rehab, then has plans for a sober living environment after that. He did it on his own....thank you HP. I took this weekend to let go and take care of me and you know what; he survived. He didn't want to be homeless...	Cathyinaz	16	606	Sep 24, 2013 by ilovedogs
	I finally moved & have more a voice to my alcoholic mothers famiyl all of a sudden :) (Preview) So I moved to Cornwall from Manchester & decided I'd textd my cousin to ask if she'd look out for mum now i'm here as i know she get upset that she's not included in stuff they do. She was very defensive & said she's 'always' there for my mum, which is bull. Mum & me were stood outside her house on...	qwerty49	4	250	Sep 24, 2013 by grateful2be
	I'm new here... It seems I found what I was searching for (Preview) Hi, I've spent a lot of time searching online for a 'cure / solution / fix' for my A. It took a while to realise that in doing that, I was becoming lost to myself in place of what is going on for him. Al-Anon helpline was a help, but having read through some of your posts, I came to realise that some people pos...	Tnika	8	570	Sep 24, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Feeling Victimized Frustrated abused rejected and misunderstood (Preview) Since I was child I always experience of getting bullied off my childhood neighbors and also in school. I've seen my parents are always fighting each other. Maybe because my father is alcoholic. I remember the time I was walking home crying because of my cruel neighbors. They always called me gay but...	Marko	9	559	Sep 24, 2013 by milkwood
	Thank you all :) (Preview) Hi everyone Thank you souls who took the time to wish me a happy birthday....if this were facebook I would have clicked a BIG like after each one and I read ALL of them... Actually it meant you all are glad that I was "hatched" and I appreciate it Had a nice day yesterday....my D#1 sent me a beau...	neshema2	4	274	Sep 24, 2013 by Breakingfree
	I don't know what to do anymore.... (Preview) My A is my husband. We have been married for 20 years and together for 25... since I was 15. We have been struggling with this for about two years this time. He had trouble about 8 years ago but got sober and stayed sober for about 6 years. This time is different... he won't get help even though he says...	Jacquiej	6	564	Sep 24, 2013 by grateful2be
	Feeling crappy when I leave meetings (Preview) Hi guys, I'm a bit frustrated at the moment. I have been going to a minimum of 2 meetings a week. I have a scheduled time to call my sponsor weekly and I have a few other program friends whom I chat with every so often during the week. My biggest issue is that I don't feel connected to my sponsor. This past...	ilovedogs	10	576	Sep 24, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	Great expectations (Preview) I had a light bulb moment...expectations are what has led to my sadness, dissapointment,ect, ect. My expectations were what anyone elses would be. In my marriage, I expected to..... be loved enjoy each others company be nurtured to ha...	islandtime	6	436	Sep 23, 2013 by Sweet Stanley
	MY BIRTHDAY is today so I am OFF on sabatical till MONDAY (Preview) I am gonna do some fun stuff.......NO recovery work for Sunday....Its my Birthday, now at 3am, I am still up from watching good movies. Going to go to sleep now and later???? HAVE FUN.....maybe I'll go browse the books at goodwill....OR play on my new "jump ball" where I straddle this big...	neshema2	13	443	Sep 23, 2013 by cwya
	to old-timers: Al Anon book recommendation for father in slight denial but open to information! (Preview) hello all old-timers, I am seeking for advice. My parents are in town. And alcohol runs in our family, it's a long time history. Not all binge drinkers, but alcohol has always been omnipresent. So for me it has become obvious it is creating problems, where if it would be absent, life could have been nice...	tortuga	8	432	Sep 23, 2013 by neshema2
	Great Intimacy Meeting today (Preview) Thought I would share a cool meeting idea with my recovery pals: Today I went to a great special 3 hr. workshop Al-anon meeting on intimacy. It had so many well thought through ideas and a panel of people with very differing intimacy situations just answering questions out of their own experience--...	luv123	3	507	Sep 23, 2013 by Mari1978
	Even Gandhi! (Preview) "It is wrong and immoral for a nation to supply intoxicating liquor to those who are addicted to drink ". Gandhi (10/2/1869-1/30/48) -- Edited by Bettina on Saturday 21st of September 2013 09:02:04 PM -- Edited by Bettina on Sunday 22nd of September 2013 12:34:55 AM	Bettina	32	567	Sep 23, 2013 by PP
	It's only words. (Preview) One thing that's been hitting the "hurt" button with me is reading posts from people talking about their A as their "best friend" who has been "lost" to them. 'Cause my A used to be my best friend too, but I don't think about that anymore. It's been so long since there wa...	Melly1248	6	461	Sep 23, 2013 by Raven Juniper
	Too busy for anything else! (Preview) I have noticed my program tools slipping with me basically living at school now and working the weekends. I have had to let house work go and am not able to make it to my Tuesday evening meetings or find time to do much else except school work. I am doing good in school, but they said this program was intense...	Breakingfree	5	561	Sep 23, 2013 by hotrod
	I feel like I am disappointing my higher power. (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. I have mentioned in the past that I decided to foster a cat so that I could give pet ownership a try and give me some company. They offered me a cat that had been poisoned by his previous owner and he started experiencing seizures. I br...	slogan_jim	11	462	Sep 23, 2013 by Debilyn
	Isolating begin today (Preview) Hi I'm not in my head or in my body I don't no where I am . My home is now a house of secrets the doors are closed and whispering begins . I have broke down my walls and busted my bubble I am open to all around me to gain access to . I'm scared my confusion has taking over me. I pray that my break down does not have my hu...	Ms co-dependent	8	484	Sep 23, 2013 by hotrod
	Time for some internal housekeeping. Scary. (Preview) Hi everyone i have posted here a couple of times and find myself frequently seeking comfort and learning on these pages. So here I am again, and that can only mean there's been yet another drama with the ABH. Promises, promises. All broken. I kicked him out of the house a month ago after his abuse went b...	Sun sun	14	573	Sep 23, 2013 by Sun sun
	H.A.L.T. prevention (Preview) I am currently understanding 'taking care of ME' by observing very strictly anti-HALT Hungry- I find pleasure in cooking and selecting healthy food--- my body seems to absorb this thankfully, I feel energetic and enjoy the cooking process...gives me creative ME time Angry- I'm tired to be angr...	tortuga	4	328	Sep 23, 2013 by Peggy7
	HP has given me a sense of humor (Preview) Hi MIP Family. Here is a small laugh for the day. My partner and I went to Jones Beach today to walk the beach, have lunch and feed the seagulls We purchased a .99 cent package of hot dogs from the Supermarket for the gulls and went to Subways and purchased a $5,00 Foot Long to share. We arrived at the b...	hotrod	8	383	Sep 22, 2013 by tiredtonite
	I am new here (Preview) So my significant other was dry for a year with the help of antibuse (which he understood would make him violently ill) he made the decision to go off the meds and try drinking socially again. We have had so much go wrong in our year and a half relationship, a house shooting, a major flood, custody battle...	Christine	8	479	Sep 22, 2013 by Christine
	Don't have to be perfect, right? (Preview) So yesterday and today I have experienced minor setbacks with my A. I'm not yelling at myself because I know I am making progress overall. But the setbacks did take me by surprise. Yesterday maybe we didn't communicate well. When I thought she would be coming home was not when she came home. She sa...	Lyne	5	417	Sep 22, 2013 by bud
	I notice that I am "infected" by ALANON.... (Preview) Today, Saturday was the last day that the gal at the front desk worked.... We have quite a history...She came to work a year after I...At first it was "ok" then one day we were facebooking , chatting and she is AT WORK...doing this on company times...I was at home...I realized this and told h...	neshema2	3	376	Sep 22, 2013 by hotrod
	For the snoopers :) (Preview) I'm a huge offender in that area ESPECIALLY when I started making a conscious decision about getting a divorce .. I got my hands on every single piece of paperwork I could get and started filing everything down. In my mind THAT is not snooping that is being proactive and thank goodness I was because he h...	Pushka	6	472	Sep 22, 2013 by Ms co-dependent
	Progress (Preview) Maybe my thinking is off on this, but I find myself no longer caring if working my program makes a difference for somebody else? Although I do want to carry the message, the results of that carrying of it simply doesn't interest me as much as it once did. What's more important to me is whether or not work...	grateful2be	6	459	Sep 22, 2013 by grateful2be
	saw myself (Preview) A new member came to my F2F meeting and I saw myself-scared, not knowing what to expect, not knowing the prayer we say together or the format. I felt relief and gratitude after my first meeting and I hope she did too. A few of us spoke to her afterwards (myself included) and a man gave her the newcomer pa...	Lyne	8	424	Sep 21, 2013 by PP
	Happy Birthday Jerry F (Preview) Enjoy!!	Peggy7	20	387	Sep 21, 2013 by el-cee
	Forgot I'm meant to wait on the shelf until I'm needed :-p (Preview) So, I took a deep breath, and adjusted my thinking as best I could. See, before I wrote that last post, I made a little plea to the A- just a little one- I said "I'm really struggling with the isolation and loneliness at the moment, do you think you could make an effort to be friendly and speak nicely to...	Melly1248	13	501	Sep 21, 2013 by el-cee
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.