Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Cafeaulait1973 · Cafeaulait1973

This morning I talked to my boyfriend for the first time after his slip up the other night. I talked to him the day after but he was still drunk so i don't really consider that "talking to him". I've heard from people who had seen him so I knew he was alive and actually they all said he didn't seem...

Irish7 · Irish7

I know there are some al anon folks here who also are AA members. If my question is inappropriate, please, moderator, close or delete it. But what I'm wondering is whether the active alcoholic is aware that they are causing spouses/children/parents to worry and agonize? Or is it that it just doesn't e...

ck78 · ck78

Hi there. I am a mother of two. My boyfriend and father to my daughter has relasped for the second time. I feel alone. Going on second day of him MIA. Last time he was gone a week. This is bigger than me, I am just looking for support.

texas yankee · texas yankee

90% of the very limited communication with my adult son lately has mostly been from me to him with an "I love you" text every other day or so, and that's about it - he's told me that any type of supportive message from me like "I have faith in you" annoys him, so I stopped with anything...

Helpangel · Helpangel

My ah is almost 90 days sober but has been very hard to deal with. Has anyone had a hard time with getting space to detach. I can detach with out a problem, really. But I have a hard time with the constant pity party. Today: I get several emails from my ah that he has to leave his job because he is an idiot that ca...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I am looking for closure from my marriage from my dry ah. He is not willing to be honest or upfront. I can't see that he has grown or changed since he started AA Three years ago. He is still not emotionally sober even after being dry for 30 years. The addict in him is alive and kicking. He has an AA Gf and show...

Cafeaulait1973 · Cafeaulait1973

Hi, my name is kris. I was raised in an alcoholic, abusive home and my mother remains with the abuser to this day(my step-father).i told myself that I would never put my kids through the abuse I went through as a child, I met my boyfriend 9yrs ago, he drank beer. He wasn't physically abusive and it took me a...

hopefull2015 · hopefull2015

Hi, I've been married 5 years and but living with my AH for about 10 years. I always knew he was a big drinker and for a long time I was too, we own a bar and it's easy enough to find yourself drinking more than you should. I all but cut out my own drinking and have been actively seeking out alternative employme...

AlmaDaigle · AlmaDaigle

Hello, I first posted a few days ago and got some really helpful responses, so here goes. Today I am feeling really paranoid that my husband was drinking last night. After I went to bed, he came in to say good night and check on me and our baby. His eyes looked red and he seemed a little off. He could have just...

shealah · shealah

Im pretty new to al anon. I went to my 3rd meeting tonight. I felt better when I left. When I came home, however, my fiance was drunk again. He got out of a 30-day inpatient rehab about 2 months ago and he has been drunk every day after the first week of getting out. Tonight he came to go bed and told me that I se...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning MIP: This reading begins with a comparison between choosing to ignore certain traffic rules in order to make our journeys a little shorter; taking some shortcuts and not following the suggested Traditions, guidelines and policies of Alanon. I am thinking about shortcuts and how in t...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

oohhhh. Acceptance stage. Im going to have to work through that some. Some of the feedback i recd about acceptance and expectations were spot on but hard to figure out. . In practice, in life. I need to process this mire. But right now to vent. My ah actually wonders why the tension level.goes up when he...

Katrina324 · Katrina324

Hello to all, I've been a way for a few weeks from posting, needed to clear my head about a lot of things. I still talk to my ex ABF on the phone, but it clearly isn't the same and I don't feel the way I used to about him. For all that don't know, I was involved with a man for a year and a half, and found out he was a he...

shealah · shealah

This is my first time posting on a board like this, but I could really use some words of wisdom and/or encouragement. I met my fiance almost 3 years ago. At the time he was a long distance truck drive and was home 3 nights a week, every Tuesday and Friday and Saturday. We fell in love so quickly...I was so...

hotrod · hotrod

The O D A T for today, February 23 speaks about my favorite subject; "Detachment". The reading goes on to explain that detachment, in the Al-Anon sense does not mean separating ourselves or our love and compassion from people. It simply means that we bring the focus back within ourselves...

Jerry F · Jerry F

So today is Sunday?? I got up and dressed for work!! What the heck...wife was still in bed and I looked at the calendar, Monday is President's Day and so being the rocket scientist I think I am at times I figured she had a holiday until she came into the kitchen and said with a smile, "Today is Su...

glad · glad

I was thinking today about the times my girlfriends had made sincere positive comments about who I was as a person. NOT flattery but they sincerely "liked" me. There are a lot of negative tapes in my head, poor me pity party stuff mostly from my childhood now but some from past alcoholic/ de...

GreenerGal · GreenerGal

I've been hovering around the board for awhile now, I just started attending Al-Anon in November and I'm getting really confused. My partner started out patient treatment and attending AA meetings 30 days ago. The majority of the time it's been really amazing and positive, but once in awhile he re...

To be loved · To be loved

So i have bee all over the place for the last two weeks. Partner away working and atto tide towards me changed which is again this 1%. He is being distant, hasnt said he loves me or misses me which he always usually does but asks what I want to do when he gets home, booming gig tickets and telling me to tell him...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Hi everyone. I have been struggling with my dry drunk who is about 90 days sober. My ah and I have been seeing a therapist and she said his behavior is normal and it will get better with time. First, Everytime a blow up happens I shut down. I am worried and anxious a lot because I never know when the nice guy or...

Auntrosie · Auntrosie

husband has been sober for almost two years And attends several meetings a week. I have been working alanine for 3 years. I am just so unhappy with myself. I just am not happy with my sober husband. I have everything I would ever need and want. On the outside we are the perfect family (kids are grown). I can...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

Before you respond, know that i ask myself" why do you stay"" all the time so theres no need to go there. I just need some compassion. Ah never came home last nite. . It was supposed to be date night, (ha, i had a date with my empty house & a snowstorm). . he had all sorts of excuses. Igot u...

andromeda · andromeda

This topic came up in a meeting this week and I thought I would throw it out to the boards. What does surrender feel like to you? What does it look like in your life after being in program for a while?

hotrod · hotrod

Today's reading in the ODAT is a great reminder to every person who has been in program for some time. It points out that when we are attending an Al-Anon meeting we should always keep in mind that the newcomer in the room is feeling, lost, confused, alone and bewildered when they first enter a meeting....

phinatic514 · phinatic514

Hi everyone, I'm new here, and am in need of serious direction. I'm 32, just finished graduate school, and am still at home because of it. Now, my father is a hardcore alcoholic. He's always been a drinker, but now it's the hard stuff. He has pretty much destroyed my entire family. I truly feel he...

Jerry F · Jerry F

http://survey.brxresearch.com/s3/Al-Anon-2015-Membership-Survey

el-cee · el-cee

Todays reading is about unacceptable behaviour and how alanon helps us work out what it is and then to set boundaries and limits. It talks about how we can stop accepting unacceptable behaviour from the alcoholics in our lives but often we still accept it from ourselves. Our own attitude towards ou...

hotrod · hotrod

Today's reading in the Alanon Daily Reader, " One Day at a Time in Alanon." Is a powerful reminder of how we hurt ourselves more than others while living with this disease and using our old tools to cope. The reading points out that we have considerable power to change our lives if we are w...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Hi all. Just a little update about this, that n everything! I've been a busy bee this last week, not on my computer much. That's a very good thing for me, I am feeling pretty good! That's not to say life is perfect, but I am mostly enjoying it all the same. A has been here a lot this week. Being Mr Sober Superma...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

So I started a new job with a nice raise and promotion two months ago. And, to be honest, my serenity is really being maxed out. I finally pinpointed what the real core of the problem was last night before I went to bed. My new boss is the female version of my AH (RIP)! I don't have any idea if she might have add...

HangingOnByAThread · HangingOnByAThread

Hello all, I am new here. Been asking these questions for some time now. I need some advice as I don't know where to turn, and feeling very isolated and alone. I plan on going to an Al-Anon meeting Monday evening. I have been in a relationship with a self-professed alcoholic for 2-1/2 years. I had not know...

likemyheart · likemyheart

And this is what you get! Tonight we finished off the extended versions of the Lord of the Rings trilogy - we stop them when we want, watch till one of us wants to stop, continue the next day or so until we've once again finished the mass of hours with all the extras. during the scene where Frodo and Sam are aw...

kiowawoman · kiowawoman

My husband is in rehab out of state over 2 1/2 hours away. He put himself there because I left him after I couldn't handle it anymore. I literally had to dump him passed out in the car in a Walmart parking lot and go in and call a cab to take me away and stay with a friend because he threatened to kill me before he...

mjferg · mjferg

I am looking out my window watching more snow fall,we are getting a lot of snow again today.I am feeling like a caged animal.I have been thinking a lot about where I am at and what I like and don't like,I guess it is from paying attention to my needs for a change.I don't really love where I live,it is comfort...

watchdog1999 · watchdog1999

I have done well in letting my husband take on his own issues, but those around me often step on my toes. Just when I think that maybe, just maybe this disease will finally slap him in the face, someone else intervenes and cleans up the mess. Last week my husband went out with his friend and came home drunk....

Skorpi · Skorpi

Apparently, I am being cold, harsh, and unkind. I think I am just being real. I do wonder, when I answer questions honestly, like "Don't you want to take me to my mom's before work?" (No, I don't. Your mom isn't home, and taking you there before work means I have to pick you up after work. It add...

Rose50 · Rose50

I have been lurking and reading but haven't posted in quite some time. There have been some changes in my life - I met a wonderful man after being on my own for over 15 years. Don't know how this relationship will unfold but I am very happy with the direction this is taking. I decided to take early retiremen...

AliceinWonderland · AliceinWonderland

Please shed some light on this. Sometimes when my husband and I have arguments, I cry a lot (hard). I end up feeling very sorry for myself and I end up thinking he is the worst person in the world. I go to the extremes and I end up feeling like I'm a victim and he is a horrible person. When I'm crying, he see...

havingablast · havingablast

Hi Everyone. This is my first time posting, though I've been browsing and reading for a few weeks now, and decided it was finally time to start taking part. My boyfriend of 6 months is an alcoholic. He went to a rehab clinic 6 or 7 years ago, and was sober for less than a year before relapsing. Since we'...

texasgal · texasgal

I talked with a couple of program friends. I was crying a lot yesterday. Everyone said basically the same thing as everyone here on the boards. I talked with him last night. I explained how the trust I had was no longer their. He said he was going to still love me no matter what I decided. I said my decision i...

Smiley99 · Smiley99

My husband is a constant drinker. He does not go a day without at least having a few beers. I'm pretty sure he sneaks beers in the mornings and at other inappropriate times during the day. He seems to secretly binge drink hard liquor in cycles, usually on the weekends every month or so. That is when i...

Claddagh7 · Claddagh7

Hi, Im new to this site. I was turned on to it by a friend of mine. I think she is worried about me and the toll alcohol is taking on my life. I dont drink - at least not often. Maybe a glass of wine at a party, but its not me thats causing all the hurt. Its my parents. They divorced a few years ago but they both have p...

Sionna · Sionna

Hi, I'm new to these boards. I've tried posting a few times but always end up rambling on and on and losing my train of thought. Basically, I can't be @rsed with the hassle of coming from my family any more. My dad is the alcoholic, he and mum are separated now, they're both 65. I'm 36 (woman) and I've one you...

ilc0013 · ilc0013

Hello All, I have been dating an alcoholic for over 7 years. It has been off and on. I have been attending meetings 3-4 times a week. However, I am interested in obtaining sponsorship.

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

The whole issue of I make plans and God laughs completely applies here .. LOL. I'm so sick at the moment and I'm in a whiney mood to boot. I'll admit it would be nice if someone were here to take care of me and just let do me. Literally I have made it through two 1/2 days of work and I really need to just stay ho...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

After all the excitement over the weekend(it is now Tuesday) I am noticing a shift in my sleep & that I am dragging around. I guess this is just like a hangover w/o any alcohol. I am struggling...at least I don't feel wound up & keyed up. I said before that I wasn't going to post for awhile & the...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Well, it has been five days since the accident now. I discovered that the insurance we had was not the "right" kind of insurance, and I have a $407 tow and storage bill for the car. The salvage yard offered $200 for it. At least it is off my hands. And, I fixed the ground in my truck, so now the tail...

Skorpi · Skorpi

After she drove her car into a pole, I told my wife I was going to Al-anon because I needed support for myself, and, I explained as she looked on in disbelief, I couldn't get that support from her, as she was the thing I needed support with. I said I was going to check our local library to see if they had any Al-...

BresslawLookalike · BresslawLookalike

Hello there - I don't know what to say, so I had best start from the beginning. I have been in a relationship with a wonderful woman for the last 4 months, but she has a problem. Well, she has a few problems not of her making but when she finds things are 'stressful' she reaches for a drink, and when she start...

Lyne · Lyne

I wonder if anyone else has had or is having the experience I am. I am feeling so much better most days. If I think about the change, it doesn't even feel real. But most nights, I dream about my A hurting me, drinking, lying, the affair of the heart, all the real bad yucky stuff that went on for the last 10 y...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I caught myself thinking back to her dad in the OB room with his big coffee mug full of beer and being afraid of him holding her. And so many other memories of being afraid of leaving him with her while I had to go to work in the evening after he got home during her toddler years. Most of her life and my memories...

el-cee · el-cee

This book has the adult child in mind. Todays reading talks about having a hole in our hearts from childhood, growing up with alcoholic parents, and thinking others will fill it, including the alcoholic husband. The reading talks about how working the alanon program can free us from secrets of our...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi MIP family I have just returned. Thanks you so much for your many prayers and warm wishes. With the passing of my brother, in addition to 15 foot waves and a bout of sea sickness, I still managed to have a good and relaxing time. Thanks to alanon tools and much prayer. Looks as if you are all stil...

clarkangel · clarkangel

Hi every one, Iam new to this site and Al-Anon. I met my partner three and a half years ago. He had been in recovery for two years. He had a dual addiction drink and cocaine. He was a lovely partner but very hard work mood wise very up and down. I started to read the signs of him being moody very self absor...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t59654077/alanon-tradition-2/Please

Brooke G · Brooke G

Hi everyone. I'm the wife of an alcoholic with complex issues; survivor of childhood abuse and emotional neglect...probably same old story, struggling to know what to do/say/think/feel. I have two young boys, the eldest is 9 and the youngest is 4, I try to get on with life for the most part, but after...

mjferg · mjferg

Winter is taking a toll on me,I have been snowed in,isolated, kind of blue.We are really getting hit by old man winter.My oldest daughter had surgery, she is okay ,but I wasn't able to be there,it was right in the middle of a bad snowstorm.I felt so bad that I wasn't there for her.I also received news fro...

lynnly · lynnly

I jump-started into al anon today when I took my husband to the ER for what I thought was pneumonia (bad enough), but was told it was most likely DT related heart arrythmia! We are still awaiting tests to determine if there was any permanent heart damage. I knew he was a heavy beer drinker, but had no id...

Luiza · Luiza

So, last week I went to my appointment with the homeless team and they wrote a very stern letter to the LL pointing out that his illegal eviction/harassment could land him in big trouble and he needed to start correct lawful procedures if he wanted to see me out of his property. If I come to the end of the l...

Jerry F · Jerry F

and guess what I thought and felt before saying I was gonna do that? This is a test so lets see your answers. Remember "He's got a lot of time in" and "Progress not Perfection" along with your own experiences. Ready GO!! No time limit or ESH limit. ((((Hugs)...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	1st talk after relapse (Preview) This morning I talked to my boyfriend for the first time after his slip up the other night. I talked to him the day after but he was still drunk so i don't really consider that "talking to him". I've heard from people who had seen him so I knew he was alive and actually they all said he didn't seem...	Cafeaulait1973	8	633	Feb 25, 2015 by Cafeaulait1973
	A question for the "double winners" (Preview) I know there are some al anon folks here who also are AA members. If my question is inappropriate, please, moderator, close or delete it. But what I'm wondering is whether the active alcoholic is aware that they are causing spouses/children/parents to worry and agonize? Or is it that it just doesn't e...	Irish7	15	1384	Feb 25, 2015 by Irish7
	New here (Preview) Hi there. I am a mother of two. My boyfriend and father to my daughter has relasped for the second time. I feel alone. Going on second day of him MIA. Last time he was gone a week. This is bigger than me, I am just looking for support.	ck78	12	793	Feb 25, 2015 by Cafeaulait1973
	When I'm wondering whether he's dead or alive . . . (Preview) 90% of the very limited communication with my adult son lately has mostly been from me to him with an "I love you" text every other day or so, and that's about it - he's told me that any type of supportive message from me like "I have faith in you" annoys him, so I stopped with anything...	texas yankee	10	861	Feb 25, 2015 by el-cee
	Detachment when they keep trying to pull on you (Preview) My ah is almost 90 days sober but has been very hard to deal with. Has anyone had a hard time with getting space to detach. I can detach with out a problem, really. But I have a hard time with the constant pity party. Today: I get several emails from my ah that he has to leave his job because he is an idiot that ca...	Helpangel	11	770	Feb 25, 2015 by pinkchip
	Closure (Preview) I am looking for closure from my marriage from my dry ah. He is not willing to be honest or upfront. I can't see that he has grown or changed since he started AA Three years ago. He is still not emotionally sober even after being dry for 30 years. The addict in him is alive and kicking. He has an AA Gf and show...	Mirandac	25	1014	Feb 24, 2015 by Mirandac
	Newbie/my story/it's happened again (Preview) Hi, my name is kris. I was raised in an alcoholic, abusive home and my mother remains with the abuser to this day(my step-father).i told myself that I would never put my kids through the abuse I went through as a child, I met my boyfriend 9yrs ago, he drank beer. He wasn't physically abusive and it took me a...	Cafeaulait1973	4	649	Feb 24, 2015 by milkwood
	First post, very nervous! (Preview) Hi, I've been married 5 years and but living with my AH for about 10 years. I always knew he was a big drinker and for a long time I was too, we own a bar and it's easy enough to find yourself drinking more than you should. I all but cut out my own drinking and have been actively seeking out alternative employme...	hopefull2015	14	814	Feb 24, 2015 by milkwood
	Feeling Paranoid about Husbands Drinking (Preview) Hello, I first posted a few days ago and got some really helpful responses, so here goes. Today I am feeling really paranoid that my husband was drinking last night. After I went to bed, he came in to say good night and check on me and our baby. His eyes looked red and he seemed a little off. He could have just...	AlmaDaigle	3	748	Feb 24, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	How to detach (Preview) Im pretty new to al anon. I went to my 3rd meeting tonight. I felt better when I left. When I came home, however, my fiance was drunk again. He got out of a 30-day inpatient rehab about 2 months ago and he has been drunk every day after the first week of getting out. Tonight he came to go bed and told me that I se...	shealah	12	1174	Feb 24, 2015 by Jerry F
	Hope For Today Feb 24 (Preview) Good morning MIP: This reading begins with a comparison between choosing to ignore certain traffic rules in order to make our journeys a little shorter; taking some shortcuts and not following the suggested Traditions, guidelines and policies of Alanon. I am thinking about shortcuts and how in t...	yanksfan51	2	561	Feb 24, 2015 by Skorpi
	friendly venting (Preview) oohhhh. Acceptance stage. Im going to have to work through that some. Some of the feedback i recd about acceptance and expectations were spot on but hard to figure out. . In practice, in life. I need to process this mire. But right now to vent. My ah actually wonders why the tension level.goes up when he...	Theoceancalls	3	772	Feb 23, 2015 by hotrod
	Starting over isn't easy, I had a date with someone new last night. (Preview) Hello to all, I've been a way for a few weeks from posting, needed to clear my head about a lot of things. I still talk to my ex ABF on the phone, but it clearly isn't the same and I don't feel the way I used to about him. For all that don't know, I was involved with a man for a year and a half, and found out he was a he...	Katrina324	8	791	Feb 23, 2015 by pinkchip
	newbie (Preview) This is my first time posting on a board like this, but I could really use some words of wisdom and/or encouragement. I met my fiance almost 3 years ago. At the time he was a long distance truck drive and was home 3 nights a week, every Tuesday and Friday and Saturday. We fell in love so quickly...I was so...	shealah	10	573	Feb 23, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	Thoughts on One Day At a Time reading for Monday 2-23-2015 (Preview) The O D A T for today, February 23 speaks about my favorite subject; "Detachment". The reading goes on to explain that detachment, in the Al-Anon sense does not mean separating ourselves or our love and compassion from people. It simply means that we bring the focus back within ourselves...	hotrod	2	631	Feb 23, 2015 by hotrod
	OH WOW!! (Preview) So today is Sunday?? I got up and dressed for work!! What the heck...wife was still in bed and I looked at the calendar, Monday is President's Day and so being the rocket scientist I think I am at times I figured she had a holiday until she came into the kitchen and said with a smile, "Today is Su...	Jerry F	5	622	Feb 23, 2015 by Cathyinaz
	A gratitude list in and of itself (Preview) I was thinking today about the times my girlfriends had made sincere positive comments about who I was as a person. NOT flattery but they sincerely "liked" me. There are a lot of negative tapes in my head, poor me pity party stuff mostly from my childhood now but some from past alcoholic/ de...	glad	1	684	Feb 23, 2015 by hotrod
	New here and have some questions about my newly sober partner (Preview) I've been hovering around the board for awhile now, I just started attending Al-Anon in November and I'm getting really confused. My partner started out patient treatment and attending AA meetings 30 days ago. The majority of the time it's been really amazing and positive, but once in awhile he re...	GreenerGal	6	801	Feb 23, 2015 by glad
	What is going on? (Preview) So i have bee all over the place for the last two weeks. Partner away working and atto tide towards me changed which is again this 1%. He is being distant, hasnt said he loves me or misses me which he always usually does but asks what I want to do when he gets home, booming gig tickets and telling me to tell him...	To be loved	11	890	Feb 23, 2015 by glad
	Therapist insight on dry drunk behavior (Preview) Hi everyone. I have been struggling with my dry drunk who is about 90 days sober. My ah and I have been seeing a therapist and she said his behavior is normal and it will get better with time. First, Everytime a blow up happens I shut down. I am worried and anxious a lot because I never know when the nice guy or...	Helpangel	15	703	Feb 22, 2015 by Jerry F
	Acceptance helpme please (Preview) husband has been sober for almost two years And attends several meetings a week. I have been working alanine for 3 years. I am just so unhappy with myself. I just am not happy with my sober husband. I have everything I would ever need and want. On the outside we are the perfect family (kids are grown). I can...	Auntrosie	8	576	Feb 22, 2015 by Jerry F
	need some tlc (Preview) Before you respond, know that i ask myself" why do you stay"" all the time so theres no need to go there. I just need some compassion. Ah never came home last nite. . It was supposed to be date night, (ha, i had a date with my empty house & a snowstorm). . he had all sorts of excuses. Igot u...	Theoceancalls	6	620	Feb 22, 2015 by Theoceancalls
	What are your thoughts on surrendering (Preview) This topic came up in a meeting this week and I thought I would throw it out to the boards. What does surrender feel like to you? What does it look like in your life after being in program for a while?	andromeda	10	1210	Feb 22, 2015 by pinkchip
	ODAT reading for 2-22 (Preview) Today's reading in the ODAT is a great reminder to every person who has been in program for some time. It points out that when we are attending an Al-Anon meeting we should always keep in mind that the newcomer in the room is feeling, lost, confused, alone and bewildered when they first enter a meeting....	hotrod	2	550	Feb 22, 2015 by hotrod
	In need of direction (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm new here, and am in need of serious direction. I'm 32, just finished graduate school, and am still at home because of it. Now, my father is a hardcore alcoholic. He's always been a drinker, but now it's the hard stuff. He has pretty much destroyed my entire family. I truly feel he...	phinatic514	11	682	Feb 22, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	Should you care (Preview) http://survey.brxresearch.com/s3/Al-Anon-2015-Membership-Survey	Jerry F	5	509	Feb 22, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	c2c feb 20th unacceptable behaviour (Preview) Todays reading is about unacceptable behaviour and how alanon helps us work out what it is and then to set boundaries and limits. It talks about how we can stop accepting unacceptable behaviour from the alcoholics in our lives but often we still accept it from ourselves. Our own attitude towards ou...	el-cee	6	827	Feb 22, 2015 by Debb
	ODAT Daily Reading for 2-21 (Preview) Today's reading in the Alanon Daily Reader, " One Day at a Time in Alanon." Is a powerful reminder of how we hurt ourselves more than others while living with this disease and using our old tools to cope. The reading points out that we have considerable power to change our lives if we are w...	hotrod	2	3089	Feb 22, 2015 by Debb
	Updates, boundaries and other stuff. (Preview) Hi all. Just a little update about this, that n everything! I've been a busy bee this last week, not on my computer much. That's a very good thing for me, I am feeling pretty good! That's not to say life is perfect, but I am mostly enjoying it all the same. A has been here a lot this week. Being Mr Sober Superma...	missmeliss	13	855	Feb 22, 2015 by DavidG
	The Light Bulb Came On- My New Boss is My AH Incarnated! (Preview) So I started a new job with a nice raise and promotion two months ago. And, to be honest, my serenity is really being maxed out. I finally pinpointed what the real core of the problem was last night before I went to bed. My new boss is the female version of my AH (RIP)! I don't have any idea if she might have add...	Green Eyes	5	783	Feb 22, 2015 by Green Eyes
	How to Enforce Boundaries and Know When To Take a Break From the Relationship? boundaries leaving venting (Preview) Hello all, I am new here. Been asking these questions for some time now. I need some advice as I don't know where to turn, and feeling very isolated and alone. I plan on going to an Al-Anon meeting Monday evening. I have been in a relationship with a self-professed alcoholic for 2-1/2 years. I had not know...	HangingOnByAThread	14	9826	Feb 22, 2015 by GreenerGal
	Leave me alone to think........... (Preview) And this is what you get! Tonight we finished off the extended versions of the Lord of the Rings trilogy - we stop them when we want, watch till one of us wants to stop, continue the next day or so until we've once again finished the mass of hours with all the extras. during the scene where Frodo and Sam are aw...	likemyheart	7	768	Feb 21, 2015 by el-cee
	Husband in rehab until early March. New here and need support. (Preview) My husband is in rehab out of state over 2 1/2 hours away. He put himself there because I left him after I couldn't handle it anymore. I literally had to dump him passed out in the car in a Walmart parking lot and go in and call a cab to take me away and stay with a friend because he threatened to kill me before he...	kiowawoman	16	990	Feb 21, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	restless and longing for adventure (Preview) I am looking out my window watching more snow fall,we are getting a lot of snow again today.I am feeling like a caged animal.I have been thinking a lot about where I am at and what I like and don't like,I guess it is from paying attention to my needs for a change.I don't really love where I live,it is comfort...	mjferg	3	895	Feb 21, 2015 by Mirandac
	"Third Party" enablers (Preview) I have done well in letting my husband take on his own issues, but those around me often step on my toes. Just when I think that maybe, just maybe this disease will finally slap him in the face, someone else intervenes and cleans up the mess. Last week my husband went out with his friend and came home drunk....	watchdog1999	13	1221	Feb 21, 2015 by pinkchip
	Needing Strength Today (Preview) Apparently, I am being cold, harsh, and unkind. I think I am just being real. I do wonder, when I answer questions honestly, like "Don't you want to take me to my mom's before work?" (No, I don't. Your mom isn't home, and taking you there before work means I have to pick you up after work. It add...	Skorpi	9	862	Feb 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	Haven't posted in some time...update (Preview) I have been lurking and reading but haven't posted in quite some time. There have been some changes in my life - I met a wonderful man after being on my own for over 15 years. Don't know how this relationship will unfold but I am very happy with the direction this is taking. I decided to take early retiremen...	Rose50	6	723	Feb 20, 2015 by Rose50
	Struggling to understand a particular pattern in my marriage (Preview) Please shed some light on this. Sometimes when my husband and I have arguments, I cry a lot (hard). I end up feeling very sorry for myself and I end up thinking he is the worst person in the world. I go to the extremes and I end up feeling like I'm a victim and he is a horrible person. When I'm crying, he see...	AliceinWonderland	7	837	Feb 20, 2015 by Mirandac
	First time poster (Preview) Hi Everyone. This is my first time posting, though I've been browsing and reading for a few weeks now, and decided it was finally time to start taking part. My boyfriend of 6 months is an alcoholic. He went to a rehab clinic 6 or 7 years ago, and was sober for less than a year before relapsing. Since we'...	havingablast	3	562	Feb 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	getting through one hour at a time (Preview) I talked with a couple of program friends. I was crying a lot yesterday. Everyone said basically the same thing as everyone here on the boards. I talked with him last night. I explained how the trust I had was no longer their. He said he was going to still love me no matter what I decided. I said my decision i...	texasgal	6	902	Feb 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	My husband is a rollercoaster (Preview) My husband is a constant drinker. He does not go a day without at least having a few beers. I'm pretty sure he sneaks beers in the mornings and at other inappropriate times during the day. He seems to secretly binge drink hard liquor in cycles, usually on the weekends every month or so. That is when i...	Smiley99	14	1031	Feb 19, 2015 by YARNCRAZY
	I never thought I would need this kind of help.... (Preview) Hi, Im new to this site. I was turned on to it by a friend of mine. I think she is worried about me and the toll alcohol is taking on my life. I dont drink - at least not often. Maybe a glass of wine at a party, but its not me thats causing all the hurt. Its my parents. They divorced a few years ago but they both have p...	Claddagh7	5	719	Feb 19, 2015 by Jerry F
	Co Dependancy? (Preview) Hi, I'm new to these boards. I've tried posting a few times but always end up rambling on and on and losing my train of thought. Basically, I can't be @rsed with the hassle of coming from my family any more. My dad is the alcoholic, he and mum are separated now, they're both 65. I'm 36 (woman) and I've one you...	Sionna	5	636	Feb 19, 2015 by pinkchip
	Looking for a Sponsor (Preview) Hello All, I have been dating an alcoholic for over 7 years. It has been off and on. I have been attending meetings 3-4 times a week. However, I am interested in obtaining sponsorship.	ilc0013	3	582	Feb 19, 2015 by Lyne
	Long Week .. at Tuesday (Preview) The whole issue of I make plans and God laughs completely applies here .. LOL. I'm so sick at the moment and I'm in a whiney mood to boot. I'll admit it would be nice if someone were here to take care of me and just let do me. Literally I have made it through two 1/2 days of work and I really need to just stay ho...	SerenityRUS	2	780	Feb 19, 2015 by andromeda
	coming way down... (Preview) After all the excitement over the weekend(it is now Tuesday) I am noticing a shift in my sleep & that I am dragging around. I guess this is just like a hangover w/o any alcohol. I am struggling...at least I don't feel wound up & keyed up. I said before that I wasn't going to post for awhile & the...	Hoot Nanny	3	507	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Day Five, and thankfully still sticking with it. (Preview) Well, it has been five days since the accident now. I discovered that the insurance we had was not the "right" kind of insurance, and I have a $407 tow and storage bill for the car. The salvage yard offered $200 for it. At least it is off my hands. And, I fixed the ground in my truck, so now the tail...	Skorpi	6	648	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	You have to be kidding me.... oh, wait... (Preview) After she drove her car into a pole, I told my wife I was going to Al-anon because I needed support for myself, and, I explained as she looked on in disbelief, I couldn't get that support from her, as she was the thing I needed support with. I said I was going to check our local library to see if they had any Al-...	Skorpi	5	831	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Never ever thought I would need to join a group like this (Preview) Hello there - I don't know what to say, so I had best start from the beginning. I have been in a relationship with a wonderful woman for the last 4 months, but she has a problem. Well, she has a few problems not of her making but when she finds things are 'stressful' she reaches for a drink, and when she start...	BresslawLookalike	28	1074	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Good days, bad dreams (Preview) I wonder if anyone else has had or is having the experience I am. I am feeling so much better most days. If I think about the change, it doesn't even feel real. But most nights, I dream about my A hurting me, drinking, lying, the affair of the heart, all the real bad yucky stuff that went on for the last 10 y...	Lyne	3	476	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	My oldest turned 17 years old yesterday (Preview) I caught myself thinking back to her dad in the OB room with his big coffee mug full of beer and being afraid of him holding her. And so many other memories of being afraid of leaving him with her while I had to go to work in the evening after he got home during her toddler years. Most of her life and my memories...	Breakingfree	8	716	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	hope for today feb 19th (Preview) This book has the adult child in mind. Todays reading talks about having a hole in our hearts from childhood, growing up with alcoholic parents, and thinking others will fill it, including the alcoholic husband. The reading talks about how working the alanon program can free us from secrets of our...	el-cee	1	595	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	I am back (Preview) Hi MIP family I have just returned. Thanks you so much for your many prayers and warm wishes. With the passing of my brother, in addition to 15 foot waves and a bout of sea sickness, I still managed to have a good and relaxing time. Thanks to alanon tools and much prayer. Looks as if you are all stil...	hotrod	9	746	Feb 19, 2015 by el-cee
	New to Al-Anon (Preview) Hi every one, Iam new to this site and Al-Anon. I met my partner three and a half years ago. He had been in recovery for two years. He had a dual addiction drink and cocaine. He was a lovely partner but very hard work mood wise very up and down. I started to read the signs of him being moody very self absor...	clarkangel	7	805	Feb 19, 2015 by hopefull2015
	Tradition 2 posted (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t59654077/alanon-tradition-2/Please	hotrod	0	356	Feb 18, 2015 by hotrod
	A long time coming (Preview) Hi everyone. I'm the wife of an alcoholic with complex issues; survivor of childhood abuse and emotional neglect...probably same old story, struggling to know what to do/say/think/feel. I have two young boys, the eldest is 9 and the youngest is 4, I try to get on with life for the most part, but after...	Brooke G	8	841	Feb 18, 2015 by likemyheart
	Winter and loss (Preview) Winter is taking a toll on me,I have been snowed in,isolated, kind of blue.We are really getting hit by old man winter.My oldest daughter had surgery, she is okay ,but I wasn't able to be there,it was right in the middle of a bad snowstorm.I felt so bad that I wasn't there for her.I also received news fro...	mjferg	2	613	Feb 18, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Hubby in ER with delirium tremens-related heart arrythmia! (Preview) I jump-started into al anon today when I took my husband to the ER for what I thought was pneumonia (bad enough), but was told it was most likely DT related heart arrythmia! We are still awaiting tests to determine if there was any permanent heart damage. I knew he was a heavy beer drinker, but had no id...	lynnly	4	723	Feb 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	The move out date is today but I am still here. (Preview) So, last week I went to my appointment with the homeless team and they wrote a very stern letter to the LL pointing out that his illegal eviction/harassment could land him in big trouble and he needed to start correct lawful procedures if he wanted to see me out of his property. If I come to the end of the l...	Luiza	9	680	Feb 18, 2015 by Luiza
	Took the day off (LOL) (Preview) and guess what I thought and felt before saying I was gonna do that? This is a test so lets see your answers. Remember "He's got a lot of time in" and "Progress not Perfection" along with your own experiences. Ready GO!! No time limit or ESH limit. ((((Hugs)...	Jerry F	14	744	Feb 18, 2015 by el-cee
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.