Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

sdisnie · sdisnie

I really need to try to detach from my 'estranged' AH....I have to for my sanity and to give myself 100% to my kids. I'm tired of every inch of my mind being consumed with the AH. I need my power back, but I don't know how to get it back. I know people who have been divorced from a relationship for years, and...

sdisnie · sdisnie

Today I dont feel like I'm going to make it through the holidays..... Last night I started to get really depressed, thinking about how I never would have thought last Thanksgiving/Christmas that this year my AH would be living with another woman and her kids..... Today the kids have all the Christmas...

xeno59 · xeno59

Thanks to all who responded and/or prayed for my son in my previous post !!!! I took one suggestion and contacted the Salvation Army Rehab Program. Gave them a quick history of my son's addiction and legal troubles. And they are willing to consider him for treatment. Got the application this week and s...

smokey28 · smokey28

Hi everyone, I knew to this board and the program. I am hoping someone can give me some guidance. My brother has been struggling with addiction for about 3 yrs now. Last year after losing his job and being in deeply in debt he agreed to go into rehab again (2nd time that my parents paid for). He went to a grea...

LearningTheRopes · LearningTheRopes

Hello and thanks for reading my post. By way of introduction, I wanted to say that my situation is probably not unique, but isn't that common. My loved one is someone who is an odd mix of family, friend and lover. We met three years ago and became friends while I had a romantic partner. We became involved r...

Tracy · Tracy

I sent my ABF a text today saying ring me, I wanted the money he said he would drop off and never. Turned his phone off this weekend again we all know what this means. Yesterday I felt better thought I carnt change him, he is ill, I dont want this in my life. He rand me on my way home from work today I was not p...

luvinmom · luvinmom

My AS hit rock bottom this time last year (of course we thought he hit rock bottom many times before). Oct, Nov, Dec of 2008 horrible awful for son and our family. Ashamed that I was wishing that he would die just so his terribile pain would end. He did embrace recovery in Feb and has been working at earn...

Holly09 · Holly09

I posted here this weekend, my ABF's brother was diagnosed with lung cancer and things have been going down hill for my abf since. I just found a 24oz beer in a brown bag in his truck tool box, I was actually in there looking for a small screwdriver. This means he is not only drinking on the weekend but dri...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi all... this is a posting from Toby Rice Drews (author of the Getting Them Sober books), reprinted with her permission, regarding the potential for sending the wrong messages when we say well meaning phrases like "stay strong", particularly with respect to the major "stay vs. l...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I had an almost stress-free thanksgiving yesterday! My mom was there: we all got along & the food was good--what more could I ask for? This year has been rough at times but I have so much to be grateful for! I know that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel when it gets really bad. I know that the ba...

LearningTheRopes · LearningTheRopes

My fully story is on another post, but I wanted to seek targeted assistance with this question: What to do after confronting someone incorrectly? I've been reading and starting to understand that I should not try to change my a-ex but rather set clear boundaries for myself. However, a few days ago, I b...

ally · ally

Hiya Guys To cut a long story short, one of the A's that used to be in my life {ten years sober}, after no contact in the last eighteen months and the end of a relationship almost three years ago. Is confusing me {ok you are allowed to laugh at that comment lol}. I've been growing in many things in my life and o...

tea2 · tea2

11/1/09 MIP Chat Room Group Business Meeting Minutes Courage opened the Meeting 9PM (EST) with The Serenity Prayer Motion was held, accepted and passed for Octobers Meeting Minutes as presented on the message board. Old Business A.Current Chair Schedule is as follows: AMMon. - Shimo/No altT...

mum2leahnjosh · mum2leahnjosh

Hi everyone I haven't been here in a while mostly because I have had trouble getting into chat can anyone help me ??????

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

This post is regarding the legal consequences of drinking and driving. My AH got his first DUI in 2004. He hired a skilled laywer and got off on a "wet reckless" because his BAC was .08. So in essence, his charge was reduced. But this reduced charge remains on his current record, despi...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((((friends)))))), I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving today....here's hoping we can all focus on the positive in our lives and remember what we have to be thankful for... Love ya, Andrea

Courage · Courage

Business meeting Sunday, December 5 Agenda: Review of November minutes Review of OP meeting schedule Old Business Voting on new OP Laison Committee member New Business Closing with the Lord's Prayer Listing MIP with WSO Reinstating monthly OP meetings Please pm me if you have any additional items...

john boy · john boy

Just wanted to say happy thanksgiving to everyone , and I hope my x is haveing a good thanksgiving also , this is the first year I will be alone for thanksgiving in several years , just depressed , but I guess I'll get over it , I always have , but it bits being alone , I wish I could take back my x but , I can't go th...

Holly09 · Holly09

Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving! I hope everyone eats too much and laughs a lot! Holly

Diva · Diva

on the 6000th member of MIP. That's amazing! And it speaks volumes of the value of this site. Happy holidays all! Diva

cdngirl · cdngirl

"Will you be my sponsor? And she said yes! I am so glad, and proud of myself for just doing it, as I have been agonizing over it for a while. It is someone who has inspired me and encouraged me since my very first meetings. I find that she is the one I always look for at a meeting and she is so sincere and g...

ThisIsBlythe · ThisIsBlythe

Dear Karilyn, I want to thank you dear friend for all of your loving reminders (and those of others also!) to "take care of us" by getting regular mammograms, pap smears, and dental exams. When caught up in all of the drama of the A, years ago, all I could do in Alanon was vent, it was all about ge...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

I'm posting to possibly help others or at least perhaps one person. I'm not seeking anything else at this point. I began coming to this board in the summer of 2007, under the name "Stormie." At the time, I had filed a dissolution of marriage and moved out of our home. 8 months later, I re...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family))), Giving a cat a bath any time is not a happy fun time. However when you have a Pipers Kitty who trots through the door and her back is full of grease.....well let's just say the Serenity Prayers over and over again. I gave her a bath yesterday along with a Fancy Feast to say "I'm sorry...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((Hello Friends)))))))), As Thanksgiving nears it is a time to be grateful for what we have...sometimes that can be hard. It can be hard to get past the pain of remembering the one's we lost. One of my best friends lost her son a year ago on Thanksgiving Day he was just 25 yrs young he had cystic fibro...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

I'm not sure if anyone has posted this or not, but I heard about it at my meeting yesterday and then my Dad e-mailed me the following information: Winona Ryder 'Enough' for Hallmark Barry Pepper to co-star in 'Lois Wilson Story' By MICHAEL SCHNEIDER Winona Ryder and Barry Pepper have been cast to star i...

maresie · maresie

One of my neighbors is reaching a bottom of sorts. She is behaving much like the ex A did when he reached a sort of bottom, I thnk there were many more after that. She blames everyone else in the world for her issues, projects all her issues over others and feels like a victim. When the ex A was doing that a...

FuzzyLogic · FuzzyLogic

I am new here. I came here because I need help. My heart is slowly breaking and I find myself putting up walls that I do not want erected. The more my ABF throws bricks at me the larger the wall becomes. This is not the life I want. I am the daughter of an alcoholic. He created havoc in our lives as children and m...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Well he came and got his stuff went ok until the end when he took a shot at me and I gave him a slam back. Oh well, it's over. Still a lot left of today and I think I will sweep my patio it's covered with leaves and stuff from a storm yesterday. Hope it will make me feel like I moved forward. Amen, fishinmama

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, As many of you know I am at the beginning of divorcing my husband. This is something I feel is right for me and as much as it hurts, I want this. Well he told me last night that he is leaving the state Wednesday and isn't planning on coming back. I am so mad at him for this. In order for the divorce to be...

alanonicScotland · alanonicScotland

I haven't been as active as I'd like on here, and thank you to people who have been supportive to me so far. I thought I'd share some ESH on Asking for Help: Q. Unfortunately, Al Anon where I live is going through some tough times - politics, control, fighting, not following traditions...*I asked for hel...

FlyingSquirrel · FlyingSquirrel

My wife just got a DUI about half an hour ago. She managed to call me, so I went to the scene. Convinced them to just leave her car there since it was legally parked. Guess I'll probably be picking her up at the station in about an hour. I hope she doesn't refuse the breathalyzer. I had really hoped she w...

supermom · supermom

My recovering alcoholic husband is very down in the dumps today. I am wondering if he is taking his medication. Haven't asked because I am afraid that he might react in an angry way. Either he is taking it and it isn't really helping him or he isn't taking it. I can't make him take the medicine. He is a...

Jozie · Jozie

Hi MIP Family :) What a last 3 days, I am Woop'd Yet can't sleep, so here I am... I have some examples of my Downs: Son about got head takin off by a soccer ball Lost the game Grandma Still in the Hospital, Uncle Still in Hospital Missed My Boy... :o) Brother & Sis Still not talking to each other Niece dati...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I was on the pc yesterday while my son was in the other room watching Fenius and Ferb, a children's cartoon show. and was listening to the show from my comfy pc chair. I was literally amazed at it. The whole jist of the show was What Super hero would you be and what would be your powers? etc.........Then th...

fishinmama · fishinmama

hello room, Today the ex boyfriend is coming to get the things of his that are still at my house. I am needless to say anxious. I hope I can conduct myself in a way that is in step with my hp. No finger pointing, no mention of new gf or marriage. Make the spilt. I am trying to remember the good and the painf...

Tracy · Tracy

My ABF has slipped over the past couple of weeks (after 6 months sober)after the death of his 5 month old nephew. Last weekend he went missing and never got in touch then a couple of days ago I had to get in touch because my daughter needed her phone which he had. He said he was trying to sort himself out was...

jasobel · jasobel

I am new to Alanon - I just went to my first meeting last week, second meeting this week. I really feel like I need a sponsor ASAP, but I have only attended two meetings. They say you are to find someone who you want to ASK to be your sponsor but I don't know any of the members well enough, or even how long they ha...

Ragdolls · Ragdolls

I went to my first meeting yesterday and it's ironic that what I went home to afterwards was a nightmare. I liked it and will keep going back. Unfortunately, I can't afford the literature so I'll just have to listen and do online readings for now. Literature can come later, right? AFiance was drunk...

Loupiness · Loupiness

My sober exAH's g/f is an A, supposedly sober. My 16 yr old son once described her kind of in a quandry, as "more like someone I go to school with than an adult" and has said that he sees the relationship his dad has with her as "not something that will last; more like a highschool romance&...

david62 · david62

Hello ((((Family)))) Soooo, tonight, like just about every other Thursday night for the last 5 years and 7 months, I set out to attend my out-of-town Al-Anon meeting. This meeting is about an hour drive from my home. At the halfway point of this drive I pass through a small town that has an "at-g...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi My ABF never contacted me yesterday with money or phone I got on wiyth my day but could nt help ringing his phone before I went to bed last night it was off so looks like he has gone on bender again with the money. Hes going right back to where he was before his 6 months sobriety. I am healthiers today and I...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am feeling better about going to the gratitude banquet tonight although it is going to be a long day & I am tired. Yesterday I posted about my A taking his fellow A to the train station. I feel differently today about it. I just realized that he was doing someone a huge favor & that I needed to let...

Rocky38 · Rocky38

Hi MIP family, I thought it would be a good idea to post here tonight. I'm looking for some ESH and maybe for my HP to give me a clue on this question. For background, many of you know that I am with an active AH. We've been together a long time (> 25 years all told) and have a teenage son. We originally came t...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Hello alanon family. New here and I am truly qualified . I have been in a relationship with an alcoholic for 4 years, had been married to an addict, folks were alcoholic, brother alcohlic/addict. I am very familar with alanon, but got cured and left for awhile. I have read your board here for the l...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello Everyone! Why does it still bother me that my husband can't be there for me? I know that when we put expectations on someone other than GOD we are let down. I don't think its expectations, I think its hope or wishes. What's the difference? I dunno sometimes. I've set a boundary and asked him to lea...

sdisnie · sdisnie

I'm so tired of always seeming to take a step forward and feeling pretty decent to then taking two steps back. I feel I never make any progress!! I know that I can't just get over my AH overnight, but I'm tired of feeling sad and thinking about it. Sometimes I hate my brain and wish I could get some shock t...

Diva · Diva

My A partner has honed selfishness into a fine art. I know, I know. All of them are selfish; of this I have no doubt. But you would think that one who went on a binge, boarded an airplane for London, stayed a week in the Dorchester Hotel there and had the nerve to come back, would be just a bit contrite. Af...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, I think I will continue to be amazed at the power this program can have on a person. I had a hard time seeing it in the past becuase my "A" insisted that Al-anon was not working for me. I didn't realize then that validation was needed, but it was. Now I am getting validation from all sorts o...

shadow1 · shadow1

(((((((((Family))))))))) I know I haven't been around much and when I do come around I seem quite...I do apologize for this but I have had a lot going on in my life. I am going in for major surgery on Dec 2 and am scared to death. I believe in the power of prayer and I am asking those of you that pray to please ad...

Dini · Dini

I know it is a choice and I don't want to feel guilty - I think it is the hardest emotion for me to control. My AH has offered up what he feels he can do to save the marriage. I have been through this before and of course, I don't have faith. Nor, does it change how I feel about him or our marriage. I didn't ask him t...

jasobel · jasobel

Please help me work through this. I have a very deep spiritual base in my life. I have always communicated with my HP on a regular basis as my best friend, confidant and advisor. My Alcoholic Ex left me three weeks ago and I am having a very hard time now questioning how a higher power who loves me would take...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I realized today that the mental and physical exhaustion, coupled with weight gain due to medical issues is slowly taking huge toll, and I am sliding quickly into depression. Fears and worry about what if's regarding my pending surgery are creeping in more often than I can count lately. I am trying t...

Rora · Rora

I've fallen from my program and I'm having a hard time getting back on. In working the steps I realized that admitting was first, then believing was next. I saw quickly that for me, without being able to believe in an HP that I could not do this "on my own". For a while I was feeling good about m...

Tracy · Tracy

I came to the board earlier feeling lonely and depressed lots of negative thinking and self pity. I ready quite a few posts before I decided to post thankfully. GUESS What my mood had changed I didnt feel alone or depressed anymore. just want to say thanks to you all I know you all get as much as I do from A...

cassidy2010 · cassidy2010

Today I took a time out from my own troubles.I mean really what good am I doing wallowing in self pity.Maybe ,I'm not sure what I need to do right now this moment in my own life.I started looking around.No more tears atleast for today.Maybe if I could bring a smile to someone elses face I might just find a sm...

grateful · grateful

I've been an alanon member for about 6 years now. When I started I was married to an active abusive alcoholic, and we divorced. I began working on myself and found myself quite serene most days. I began a relationship with a terrific normal man who was everything I wanted in a partner. He moved in with me a...

maresie · maresie

I would like to spend the next hundred years taking the inventory of the ex A. What I've learned recently from watching other people engaging in the madness of trying to squeeze something out of an alcoholic is that I had my part. One sure thing is the more impossible the relationship was, the higher t...

Holly09 · Holly09

That is what I feel my A boyfriend of 7 yrs is right now. He grew up in a family that didn't discuss how they felt and this is how he is now, the time bomb part is that last year he lost his mom to lung cancer and I also lost my dad to lung cancer. Both times he does what the A does to make them selves feel better (or...

sdisnie · sdisnie

Anyone know anything about lawyer stuff??? The company my AH works for is a small company that is owned by two guys that are also his buddies. They both have issues as well, with alcohol and drugs problems. Anyway, the one owner, Jason, he's getting a divorce from his wife. Well...his wife owns a porti...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Need to detach (Preview) I really need to try to detach from my 'estranged' AH....I have to for my sanity and to give myself 100% to my kids. I'm tired of every inch of my mind being consumed with the AH. I need my power back, but I don't know how to get it back. I know people who have been divorced from a relationship for years, and...	sdisnie	5	1310	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	Bad thoughts.... (Preview) Today I dont feel like I'm going to make it through the holidays..... Last night I started to get really depressed, thinking about how I never would have thought last Thanksgiving/Christmas that this year my AH would be living with another woman and her kids..... Today the kids have all the Christmas...	sdisnie	12	1324	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	Thanks for your prayers and suggestions Keep praying please (Preview) Thanks to all who responded and/or prayed for my son in my previous post !!!! I took one suggestion and contacted the Salvation Army Rehab Program. Gave them a quick history of my son's addiction and legal troubles. And they are willing to consider him for treatment. Got the application this week and s...	xeno59	10	836	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	guidance (Preview) Hi everyone, I knew to this board and the program. I am hoping someone can give me some guidance. My brother has been struggling with addiction for about 3 yrs now. Last year after losing his job and being in deeply in debt he agreed to go into rehab again (2nd time that my parents paid for). He went to a grea...	smokey28	4	756	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	By way of introduction... (Preview) Hello and thanks for reading my post. By way of introduction, I wanted to say that my situation is probably not unique, but isn't that common. My loved one is someone who is an odd mix of family, friend and lover. We met three years ago and became friends while I had a romantic partner. We became involved r...	LearningTheRopes	12	1000	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	scared (Preview) I sent my ABF a text today saying ring me, I wanted the money he said he would drop off and never. Turned his phone off this weekend again we all know what this means. Yesterday I felt better thought I carnt change him, he is ill, I dont want this in my life. He rand me on my way home from work today I was not p...	Tracy	2	797	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	1 Year Anniversary Good & Bad feelings (Preview) My AS hit rock bottom this time last year (of course we thought he hit rock bottom many times before). Oct, Nov, Dec of 2008 horrible awful for son and our family. Ashamed that I was wishing that he would die just so his terribile pain would end. He did embrace recovery in Feb and has been working at earn...	luvinmom	3	860	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	Progression (Preview) I posted here this weekend, my ABF's brother was diagnosed with lung cancer and things have been going down hill for my abf since. I just found a 24oz beer in a brown bag in his truck tool box, I was actually in there looking for a small screwdriver. This means he is not only drinking on the weekend but dri...	Holly09	4	800	Nov 28, 2009 by maresie
	Leave vs. Stay, Strong vs Weak, etc. (Preview) Hi all... this is a posting from Toby Rice Drews (author of the Getting Them Sober books), reprinted with her permission, regarding the potential for sending the wrong messages when we say well meaning phrases like "stay strong", particularly with respect to the major "stay vs. l...	canadianguy	8	1148	Nov 28, 2009 by ThisIsBlythe
	AN ALMOST STRESS-FREE THANKSGIVING! (Preview) I had an almost stress-free thanksgiving yesterday! My mom was there: we all got along & the food was good--what more could I ask for? This year has been rough at times but I have so much to be grateful for! I know that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel when it gets really bad. I know that the ba...	Hoot Nanny	1	510	Nov 28, 2009 by Christy
	What to do now? (Preview) My fully story is on another post, but I wanted to seek targeted assistance with this question: What to do after confronting someone incorrectly? I've been reading and starting to understand that I should not try to change my a-ex but rather set clear boundaries for myself. However, a few days ago, I b...	LearningTheRopes	9	924	Nov 27, 2009 by abbyal
	Help: Confused By A (Preview) Hiya Guys To cut a long story short, one of the A's that used to be in my life {ten years sober}, after no contact in the last eighteen months and the end of a relationship almost three years ago. Is confusing me {ok you are allowed to laugh at that comment lol}. I've been growing in many things in my life and o...	ally	7	897	Nov 27, 2009 by abbyal
	11/1/09 MIP Chat Room Group Business Meeting Minutes (Preview) 11/1/09 MIP Chat Room Group Business Meeting Minutes Courage opened the Meeting 9PM (EST) with The Serenity Prayer Motion was held, accepted and passed for Octobers Meeting Minutes as presented on the message board. Old Business A.Current Chair Schedule is as follows: AMMon. - Shimo/No altT...	tea2	0	805	Nov 27, 2009 by tea2
	Chat (Preview) Hi everyone I haven't been here in a while mostly because I have had trouble getting into chat can anyone help me ??????	mum2leahnjosh	2	840	Nov 27, 2009 by Maria123
	The "Legal" Consequences of Living w/AH (Preview) This post is regarding the legal consequences of drinking and driving. My AH got his first DUI in 2004. He hired a skilled laywer and got off on a "wet reckless" because his BAC was .08. So in essence, his charge was reduced. But this reduced charge remains on his current record, despi...	GailMichelle	10	1132	Nov 27, 2009 by sdisnie
	WISHING ALL OF YOU A HAPPY THANKSGIVING (Preview) ((((((friends)))))), I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving today....here's hoping we can all focus on the positive in our lives and remember what we have to be thankful for... Love ya, Andrea	Andrea12	3	751	Nov 27, 2009 by blender_girl
	December Business Meeting Agenda (Preview) Business meeting Sunday, December 5 Agenda: Review of November minutes Review of OP meeting schedule Old Business Voting on new OP Laison Committee member New Business Closing with the Lord's Prayer Listing MIP with WSO Reinstating monthly OP meetings Please pm me if you have any additional items...	Courage	1	592	Nov 27, 2009 by shimo
	Thanksgiving (Preview) Just wanted to say happy thanksgiving to everyone , and I hope my x is haveing a good thanksgiving also , this is the first year I will be alone for thanksgiving in several years , just depressed , but I guess I'll get over it , I always have , but it bits being alone , I wish I could take back my x but , I can't go th...	john boy	5	594	Nov 27, 2009 by Jerry F
	Happy Thanksgiving (Preview) Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving! I hope everyone eats too much and laughs a lot! Holly	Holly09	1	607	Nov 26, 2009 by Jerry F
	We're sneaking up quickly.... (Preview) on the 6000th member of MIP. That's amazing! And it speaks volumes of the value of this site. Happy holidays all! Diva	Diva	1	546	Nov 26, 2009 by Debilyn
	I did it! Said those 5 little words (Preview) "Will you be my sponsor? And she said yes! I am so glad, and proud of myself for just doing it, as I have been agonizing over it for a while. It is someone who has inspired me and encouraged me since my very first meetings. I find that she is the one I always look for at a meeting and she is so sincere and g...	cdngirl	10	2755	Nov 26, 2009 by cdngirl
	Thanks karilyn and Pipers Kitty! (Preview) Dear Karilyn, I want to thank you dear friend for all of your loving reminders (and those of others also!) to "take care of us" by getting regular mammograms, pap smears, and dental exams. When caught up in all of the drama of the A, years ago, all I could do in Alanon was vent, it was all about ge...	ThisIsBlythe	2	447	Nov 25, 2009 by Christy
	Why I Am Making the Choice to Divorce (Preview) I'm posting to possibly help others or at least perhaps one person. I'm not seeking anything else at this point. I began coming to this board in the summer of 2007, under the name "Stormie." At the time, I had filed a dissolution of marriage and moved out of our home. 8 months later, I re...	GailMichelle	8	1359	Nov 25, 2009 by Diva
	Cat, motor oil & water don't mix! (Preview) (((((Family))), Giving a cat a bath any time is not a happy fun time. However when you have a Pipers Kitty who trots through the door and her back is full of grease.....well let's just say the Serenity Prayers over and over again. I gave her a bath yesterday along with a Fancy Feast to say "I'm sorry...	Karilynn	5	868	Nov 25, 2009 by Diva
	As Thanksgiving Nears (Preview) ((((Hello Friends)))))))), As Thanksgiving nears it is a time to be grateful for what we have...sometimes that can be hard. It can be hard to get past the pain of remembering the one's we lost. One of my best friends lost her son a year ago on Thanksgiving Day he was just 25 yrs young he had cystic fibro...	Andrea12	6	881	Nov 25, 2009 by Karilynn
	Lois W Movie (Preview) I'm not sure if anyone has posted this or not, but I heard about it at my meeting yesterday and then my Dad e-mailed me the following information: Winona Ryder 'Enough' for Hallmark Barry Pepper to co-star in 'Lois Wilson Story' By MICHAEL SCHNEIDER Winona Ryder and Barry Pepper have been cast to star i...	N8SMOM	5	1650	Nov 24, 2009 by barisax
	reliving the death of a relationship (Preview) One of my neighbors is reaching a bottom of sorts. She is behaving much like the ex A did when he reached a sort of bottom, I thnk there were many more after that. She blames everyone else in the world for her issues, projects all her issues over others and feels like a victim. When the ex A was doing that a...	maresie	8	1005	Nov 24, 2009 by maresie
	Brick by Brick the walls go up (Preview) I am new here. I came here because I need help. My heart is slowly breaking and I find myself putting up walls that I do not want erected. The more my ABF throws bricks at me the larger the wall becomes. This is not the life I want. I am the daughter of an alcoholic. He created havoc in our lives as children and m...	FuzzyLogic	7	990	Nov 24, 2009 by hotrod
	One more step (Preview) Well he came and got his stuff went ok until the end when he took a shot at me and I gave him a slam back. Oh well, it's over. Still a lot left of today and I think I will sweep my patio it's covered with leaves and stuff from a storm yesterday. Hope it will make me feel like I moved forward. Amen, fishinmama	fishinmama	1	614	Nov 24, 2009 by Andrea12
	Prayers Please (Preview) Hi family, As many of you know I am at the beginning of divorcing my husband. This is something I feel is right for me and as much as it hurts, I want this. Well he told me last night that he is leaving the state Wednesday and isn't planning on coming back. I am so mad at him for this. In order for the divorce to be...	Mandy123	10	565	Nov 24, 2009 by Andrea12
	ESH - Good News, Asking for help (Preview) I haven't been as active as I'd like on here, and thank you to people who have been supportive to me so far. I thought I'd share some ESH on Asking for Help: Q. Unfortunately, Al Anon where I live is going through some tough times - politics, control, fighting, not following traditions...*I asked for hel...	alanonicScotland	3	889	Nov 24, 2009 by Mariner
	Well apparently I didn't have long to wait. (Preview) My wife just got a DUI about half an hour ago. She managed to call me, so I went to the scene. Convinced them to just leave her car there since it was legally parked. Guess I'll probably be picking her up at the station in about an hour. I hope she doesn't refuse the breathalyzer. I had really hoped she w...	FlyingSquirrel	6	576	Nov 23, 2009 by LearningTheRopes
	don't think alcoholic is taking his meds...need some serenity (Preview) My recovering alcoholic husband is very down in the dumps today. I am wondering if he is taking his medication. Haven't asked because I am afraid that he might react in an angry way. Either he is taking it and it isn't really helping him or he isn't taking it. I can't make him take the medicine. He is a...	supermom	3	729	Nov 23, 2009 by supermom
	Down N Back up... (Preview) Hi MIP Family :) What a last 3 days, I am Woop'd Yet can't sleep, so here I am... I have some examples of my Downs: Son about got head takin off by a soccer ball Lost the game Grandma Still in the Hospital, Uncle Still in Hospital Missed My Boy... :o) Brother & Sis Still not talking to each other Niece dati...	Jozie	3	752	Nov 23, 2009 by Andrea12
	Multi-Woman saves the day!!! What superhero would you be? (Preview) I was on the pc yesterday while my son was in the other room watching Fenius and Ferb, a children's cartoon show. and was listening to the show from my comfy pc chair. I was literally amazed at it. The whole jist of the show was What Super hero would you be and what would be your powers? etc.........Then th...	shellyj123	4	848	Nov 23, 2009 by Hoot Nanny
	a test of serenity (Preview) hello room, Today the ex boyfriend is coming to get the things of his that are still at my house. I am needless to say anxious. I hope I can conduct myself in a way that is in step with my hp. No finger pointing, no mention of new gf or marriage. Make the spilt. I am trying to remember the good and the painf...	fishinmama	2	882	Nov 23, 2009 by hotrod
	He wants to meet (Preview) My ABF has slipped over the past couple of weeks (after 6 months sober)after the death of his 5 month old nephew. Last weekend he went missing and never got in touch then a couple of days ago I had to get in touch because my daughter needed her phone which he had. He said he was trying to sort himself out was...	Tracy	6	873	Nov 23, 2009 by maresie
	How do I find a sponsor (Preview) I am new to Alanon - I just went to my first meeting last week, second meeting this week. I really feel like I need a sponsor ASAP, but I have only attended two meetings. They say you are to find someone who you want to ASK to be your sponsor but I don't know any of the members well enough, or even how long they ha...	jasobel	3	1949	Nov 23, 2009 by alanonicScotland
	First FTF meeting and a terrible night (Preview) I went to my first meeting yesterday and it's ironic that what I went home to afterwards was a nightmare. I liked it and will keep going back. Unfortunately, I can't afford the literature so I'll just have to listen and do online readings for now. Literature can come later, right? AFiance was drunk...	Ragdolls	7	693	Nov 23, 2009 by alanonicScotland
	Protecting my kids with sanity (I hope!) (Preview) My sober exAH's g/f is an A, supposedly sober. My 16 yr old son once described her kind of in a quandry, as "more like someone I go to school with than an adult" and has said that he sees the relationship his dad has with her as "not something that will last; more like a highschool romance&...	Loupiness	3	655	Nov 22, 2009 by serendipity
	Another lesson on listening to HP (Preview) Hello ((((Family)))) Soooo, tonight, like just about every other Thursday night for the last 5 years and 7 months, I set out to attend my out-of-town Al-Anon meeting. This meeting is about an hour drive from my home. At the halfway point of this drive I pass through a small town that has an "at-g...	david62	10	986	Nov 22, 2009 by maresie
	gone again (Preview) Hi My ABF never contacted me yesterday with money or phone I got on wiyth my day but could nt help ringing his phone before I went to bed last night it was off so looks like he has gone on bender again with the money. Hes going right back to where he was before his 6 months sobriety. I am healthiers today and I...	Tracy	1	730	Nov 22, 2009 by Rocky38
	Feelin' better about today! (Preview) I am feeling better about going to the gratitude banquet tonight although it is going to be a long day & I am tired. Yesterday I posted about my A taking his fellow A to the train station. I feel differently today about it. I just realized that he was doing someone a huge favor & that I needed to let...	Hoot Nanny	2	711	Nov 22, 2009 by Rocky38
	Difficult detachment (Preview) Hi MIP family, I thought it would be a good idea to post here tonight. I'm looking for some ESH and maybe for my HP to give me a clue on this question. For background, many of you know that I am with an active AH. We've been together a long time (> 25 years all told) and have a teenage son. We originally came t...	Rocky38	7	1958	Nov 22, 2009 by Rocky38
	Am I nuts? (Preview) Hello alanon family. New here and I am truly qualified . I have been in a relationship with an alcoholic for 4 years, had been married to an addict, folks were alcoholic, brother alcohlic/addict. I am very familar with alanon, but got cured and left for awhile. I have read your board here for the l...	fishinmama	7	866	Nov 22, 2009 by fishinmama
	Why does it still bother me? (Preview) Hello Everyone! Why does it still bother me that my husband can't be there for me? I know that when we put expectations on someone other than GOD we are let down. I don't think its expectations, I think its hope or wishes. What's the difference? I dunno sometimes. I've set a boundary and asked him to lea...	Sincerely	5	1227	Nov 22, 2009 by Karilynn
	One step forward...two steps back (Preview) I'm so tired of always seeming to take a step forward and feeling pretty decent to then taking two steps back. I feel I never make any progress!! I know that I can't just get over my AH overnight, but I'm tired of feeling sad and thinking about it. Sometimes I hate my brain and wish I could get some shock t...	sdisnie	3	832	Nov 21, 2009 by Maria123
	Selfishness (Preview) My A partner has honed selfishness into a fine art. I know, I know. All of them are selfish; of this I have no doubt. But you would think that one who went on a binge, boarded an airplane for London, stayed a week in the Dorchester Hotel there and had the nerve to come back, would be just a bit contrite. Af...	Diva	8	880	Nov 21, 2009 by Maria123
	Choosing Recovery (Preview) Hi all, I think I will continue to be amazed at the power this program can have on a person. I had a hard time seeing it in the past becuase my "A" insisted that Al-anon was not working for me. I didn't realize then that validation was needed, but it was. Now I am getting validation from all sorts o...	Mandy123	3	848	Nov 21, 2009 by Maria123
	prayers needed please (Preview) (((((((((Family))))))))) I know I haven't been around much and when I do come around I seem quite...I do apologize for this but I have had a lot going on in my life. I am going in for major surgery on Dec 2 and am scared to death. I believe in the power of prayer and I am asking those of you that pray to please ad...	shadow1	14	700	Nov 21, 2009 by Maria123
	Feeling Guilty (Preview) I know it is a choice and I don't want to feel guilty - I think it is the hardest emotion for me to control. My AH has offered up what he feels he can do to save the marriage. I have been through this before and of course, I don't have faith. Nor, does it change how I feel about him or our marriage. I didn't ask him t...	Dini	4	618	Nov 21, 2009 by xeno59
	Trusting your higher power (Preview) Please help me work through this. I have a very deep spiritual base in my life. I have always communicated with my HP on a regular basis as my best friend, confidant and advisor. My Alcoholic Ex left me three weeks ago and I am having a very hard time now questioning how a higher power who loves me would take...	jasobel	11	916	Nov 21, 2009 by xeno59
	Baby steps.......... (Preview) I realized today that the mental and physical exhaustion, coupled with weight gain due to medical issues is slowly taking huge toll, and I am sliding quickly into depression. Fears and worry about what if's regarding my pending surgery are creeping in more often than I can count lately. I am trying t...	shellyj123	3	607	Nov 21, 2009 by xeno59
	I've fallen...how do I get up? Reconnecting with HP (Preview) I've fallen from my program and I'm having a hard time getting back on. In working the steps I realized that admitting was first, then believing was next. I saw quickly that for me, without being able to believe in an HP that I could not do this "on my own". For a while I was feeling good about m...	Rora	6	749	Nov 21, 2009 by xeno59
	This board (Preview) I came to the board earlier feeling lonely and depressed lots of negative thinking and self pity. I ready quite a few posts before I decided to post thankfully. GUESS What my mood had changed I didnt feel alone or depressed anymore. just want to say thanks to you all I know you all get as much as I do from A...	Tracy	4	697	Nov 21, 2009 by xeno59
	timeout from me (Preview) Today I took a time out from my own troubles.I mean really what good am I doing wallowing in self pity.Maybe ,I'm not sure what I need to do right now this moment in my own life.I started looking around.No more tears atleast for today.Maybe if I could bring a smile to someone elses face I might just find a sm...	cassidy2010	4	584	Nov 21, 2009 by xeno59
	Would like an alanon perspective please (Preview) I've been an alanon member for about 6 years now. When I started I was married to an active abusive alcoholic, and we divorced. I began working on myself and found myself quite serene most days. I began a relationship with a terrific normal man who was everything I wanted in a partner. He moved in with me a...	grateful	7	999	Nov 21, 2009 by maresie
	my own part (Preview) I would like to spend the next hundred years taking the inventory of the ex A. What I've learned recently from watching other people engaging in the madness of trying to squeeze something out of an alcoholic is that I had my part. One sure thing is the more impossible the relationship was, the higher t...	maresie	5	1451	Nov 21, 2009 by maresie
	The ticking time bomb (Preview) That is what I feel my A boyfriend of 7 yrs is right now. He grew up in a family that didn't discuss how they felt and this is how he is now, the time bomb part is that last year he lost his mom to lung cancer and I also lost my dad to lung cancer. Both times he does what the A does to make them selves feel better (or...	Holly09	1	685	Nov 21, 2009 by Debilyn
	Conflict of Interest? (Preview) Anyone know anything about lawyer stuff??? The company my AH works for is a small company that is owned by two guys that are also his buddies. They both have issues as well, with alcohol and drugs problems. Anyway, the one owner, Jason, he's getting a divorce from his wife. Well...his wife owns a porti...	sdisnie	6	767	Nov 21, 2009 by Debilyn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.