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Busyness and Isolation
(Preview)
Because I've been to "busy" latley, I've isolated myself from everyone, even my Al-anon friends. In the last year I've been to about 5 meetings, not including this second posting that I've put online. That is not enough.........I miss being part of a fellowship which I was when I had more t...
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RoseODAT
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6
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1011
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Need your perspective
(Preview)
My AHsober called last night. He is coming to town for meetings (we work for the same company). He asked if he could stay over night and then we both attend meetings on Friday. I said yes. Our son has moved back in with me after graduating from college. So he could see his son. His sister lives 10 miles down t...
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nmike
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6
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849
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Literature for the newcomer
(Preview)
Hi everyone, my name is Phil and I'm a recovering alcoholic. Although my girlfriend has never experienced me in active addiction, she is the child of an alcoholic, and has shown interest in attending Al-Anon meetings. Any suggested reading I should tell her about? We've had many conversations abo...
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phil a
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8
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1282
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different meetings
(Preview)
I have been going to two alanon meetings a week, I know they are good meetings that follow the principles of al anon. There are a couple of old timers that talk to us about the traditions etc dont give advice, no cross talking things like that. I went to a different meeting last week and people were givi...
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Tracy
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3
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750
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update
(Preview)
Hi all, I haven't posted for a while, but I have been lurking and replying to posts. :) I am never cease to be amazed by how much my life has changed since I decided to take it back and truly focus on me. My divorce from my "A" will be final on 03/02/10. I am anxious, nervous and a little sad. Even th...
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Mandy123
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7
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702
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HELP, I NEED ADVICE!
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I have a question. My son is 26 yrs. old and he is the alcoholic. He voluntarily went to the hospital last night and had himself admitted because he is depressed and felt suicidal. He finally admitted he needed help. I thank God for that! He said he had no choice, that he lost everything...
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roxygirl
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6
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630
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Life changing stuff
(Preview)
Hi all, I would like to share some lyrics to a song that has really touched me and has kind of been my song for a while now. You've got your reasons Reasons just to walk away No one would blame you if you didn't want to face the pain You find yourself Up against the wall You're scared to push cause it might fal...
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Mandy123
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2
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702
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Haven't been here for awhile --- MEGA RELAPSE FOR ME
(Preview)
Grrrrrr I am so angry at myself. I had a mega slip the past month and a half. STILL living with exbf. We were still acting as though we were together. He took a turn this week and turned into this horrific individual - not wanting to be near me, saying nasty things. The worst part is that I convinced myself...
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RunnerChick
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8
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1001
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why me?
(Preview)
just taking time out from studying to catch up with you all..... my there has been some real progress since the last time i was here for a lot of you! "taking care of you" is beginning to work and it fills me with hope. while i was reading through the posts i had missed i was struck by a common thr...
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miss lucy
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3
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753
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What to do about an active alcoholic?
(Preview)
I read someone post somewhere that its OK to post here everyday. I am going through a tough time, a trial of faith and a trial of someone I love getting close to hitting bottom. My ex boyfriend whom I write about is in a terrible cycle downward. He was sober 9 months with me - left for another alcoholic woman...
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jasobel
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6
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1348
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Have alot of belief in HP but don't have faith :(
(Preview)
Has anyone faced this confusion? I friend of mine recently told me I don't have faith. I said what - of course I have faith I have a strong belief in my higher power. Then I realized he a is right. I have a strong belief that a HP exists - that is is all loving, all knowing and wonderful. I belief in the after lif...
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jasobel
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3
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710
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I know it’s no use railing against life.........but sometimes...... (long...sorry).
(Preview)
Sorry in advance for this vent but my head is about to burst.My Ason (33) is due in court (maybe even been there already, I dont know) for criminal damage....and has another similar charge pending......all in the pursuit of drink. I never thought, as a mother, I would utter these words....... but I h...
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Ness
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4
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820
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Unhappy and discouraged...long, please read...help!
(Preview)
My A has been home from treatment, about 1month, and I am very unhappy. He was gone 4 months (we thought the issue was depression, he had a breakdown, where he pushed me through the laundry room doors and threatened me (he has never done anything like this before), he was arrested, with his parents for 1...
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SheWolf
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8
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934
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Blonde in a Blizzard
(Preview)
Laughter is the sound of recovery... have a great day (((everyone))) Blonde in a BlizzardIt was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero when the little blonde got off work. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car w...
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glad lee
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3
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803
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About Bub
(Preview)
I talked to mbub this morning - she is doing well sounded positive . Docs felt the procedure went well did what it was intended to do , she has new meds and will go back to docs in two weeks by then they will know how they will continue to treat the tumor. She may go home tomorrow if all goes well . she says t...
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abbyal
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3
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650
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so far so good
(Preview)
This is an update to my post a few days ago, ¨I have to do this¨. Anyway, since getting AH to the Dr. he found nothing obviously wrong with him except his drinking. AH said he wanted to quit and it's been three days so far. He looks so much better already. Had some withdrawal symptoms the first two days, but...
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pineapple
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4
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567
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Right where I needed to be.
(Preview)
All last week it was one stress on top of another......my serenity had crumbled and Tuesday night I was planning going to my f2f next day to try and find some healing in the room.Wednesday I woke to a silent snow-world, there had been a huge dump of snow overnight. I thought I wont impose on husb to drive me...
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Ness
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6
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1004
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HP N Awareness... What a Week...
(Preview)
Hello All... ;) My Winter Slump is still in full swing, the snow outside is still at over a foot, the sun did try to come out a couple times thru out the week, but there was to much to melt... I started my Week off "Wonderfully", went to the Movies with some Girly's from our Home Group... BIG HELP....
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Jozie
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4
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850
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I can see the worm and I am not biting
(Preview)
Hi all, My soon to be ex "A" has been emailing me lately as this is our only form of communication at this time. Today I had two emails in my inbox and they were nothing but bait. The "I am sorrys" and the "I wish I wasn't such a failure" and the "I wish I was the man that y...
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Mandy123
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5
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782
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A Short Prayer That will Help Us To "Not React" To Our Alcoholic !!!
(Preview)
HP keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth. HUGS, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Wednesday 17th of February 2010 11:58:07 AM -- Edited by RLC on Wednesday 17th of February 2010 12:05:26 PM
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RLC
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12
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1766
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When is enough enough???
(Preview)
((((((((((Friends)))))))))), My two teenagers are driving me literally insane....I am at the end of my rope with them......I want to tell them get the hell out.....I have endured more than I can handle....all they do is argue and argue over the most stupid stuff....and it's not small arguing it's h...
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Andrea12
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9
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950
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Denial
(Preview)
After a year of putting back together my physical health (and I"m not finished yet) I have come to see my denial at the ex A's drinking, using and general insanity crossed the line into my own life. I certainly had enormous denial about the issues with my health, my financial picture (totally rui...
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maresie
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4
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1146
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wdiagw's post got me to thinking
(Preview)
For those of you who have alcoholic spouses who have done some really disgusting, embarassing things when they are drunk, how do you get past that. I mean really? Peeing in the fridge? Peeing on the tv? My AH has done a lot of things while he's drunk and I just don't see him as the same person anymore - I...
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N8SMOM
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9
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968
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The significant problems we have created cannot be solved at the same level of thinking at when we created them!
(Preview)
Some things just jump right out and bite ya bum, I'm not too good with words some people can just write very few and get it right out there, me I have to write essays, but the the thing is, it all takes time to process what it is, I read to understand it fully and then struggle to try and apply it to my life, even...
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Katy
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8
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1134
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Dry Drunk Infidelity...help.
(Preview)
On Sunday, February 6, I posted a question asking for ESH from those of you who have dealt, successfully, with infidelity by a dry alcoholic. I was very grateful for the 3 very helpful replies. There is one reply, which I wanted to read again because it was so powerful to me. Now it's gone. You know who you...
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ElizabethP65
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8
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3966
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Update
(Preview)
So I told a friend of mine I gave him 90 days before he would be in jail. He called me from somewhere Thurs and Fri. and he was sleeping w/ ppl for a place to stay. Fun, fun, fun. I got a strange call late Sat. night and sure enough he was in jail. I looked it up online and see he is in til the 22nd. So I thought,...
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carolinagirl
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3
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495
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Been gone awhile and desperate for help.
(Preview)
So here's my story. Where I came from, what happened, and where I am today. I am 27 years old and have been married to my husband 5 months, we've been together 5 years. He is a recovering alcoholic. He was drinking and using for the first 2 years of our relationship, and thankfully has 3 years sober and cont...
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LeesesPieces
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6
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1298
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Here is a little something to pray for.
(Preview)
HOPE!! Just found out that the state legislature is considering a proposal that all the liquor licensenees in the state have their employees that handle alcohol from the establishment to the drinker be educated on alcohol and the effects it has on drinkers plus a few other twists. I have no idea if t...
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Jerry F
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14
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1366
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Prayer Request for mbub
(Preview)
Good morning fellow members Because I believe so strongly in the power of prayer, I am asking as many who care to to join me in prayer today for mbub. Some of you may know her and others not, she is having treatment today for a tumor in her head. I believe that the more prayers go up the better able HP is able to...
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grammie
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7
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973
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I have to talk to someone; I can't handle this anymore (sorry-long)
(Preview)
I have to get this off my chest. My husband is an alcoholic. He accepts that he is an alcoholic; he embraces the fact that he is an alcoholic; he brags to buddies about how much he drinks. He doesn't think he is doing anything wrong because he still gets up in the morning and goes to work every day. His ac...
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wdiagw
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12
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1247
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What a good weekend
(Preview)
I had a great weekend full of recovery. It was our annual round up here. I hadn't been in a couple of years. This year it was gently suggested that I go. For me. I have missed it so. The speakers, the fellowship. Seeing friends who I haven't seen in years in some cases. Just the love. So, I went. The speakers w...
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freeagain
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6
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826
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Step Work on MIP???
(Preview)
Hello Family, So I have had this idea rolling around in my head for quite some time. I am getting ready to do my second round of the steps with my sponsor. I have always had this urge to really get into some deep discussions here with my MIP family regarding the steps and learn what the people I spend so muc...
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tlcate
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12
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828
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I have to do this
(Preview)
Since I found this site I've learned so much. Mostly to take care of me first which includes learning to detach from my AH. I've quit nagging him about his drinking, I don't yell at him or argue about the help I don't get from him. I don't try to make him eat, shower or do anything else. I've let him be even whe...
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pineapple
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13
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1029
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Valentines Day
(Preview)
This has been talked about on this board before but it is now imminent and I am feeling increaslingly sad. AH and I met on Valentine's day 40 years ago. He gatecrashed a party I held with fellow flatmates. I got talking to him at the end of the evening, he asked me out and the rest, as they say, is history. We h...
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Tattyhead
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12
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616
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12 Steps of Pre-Program
(Preview)
Hi folks.....a friend sent this to me, I like it......... thought you might too. Don't know the original source.........maybe you will. 1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing - that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us. 2. Came to believe there was...
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Ness
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5
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811
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Why Do People Think They Are All Above It?
(Preview)
I am the mother of an addicted adult son. I love my son very much and someday I hope he will love himself also. I cringe when I hear people giving their opinion on addicts and what should be done about them. "They (addicts) should be put into prison with the key thrown away", I would never put up...
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DreamsOver
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13
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1026
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NEW * Addiction to oxycontin, what do I do?
(Preview)
Where do I begin? It has been hectic past couple of weeks and not being able to get here hasn't helped. The first trauma/drama was husband having chest pains and being admitted to the hospital and getting a 2nd stint put in his heart. He had a blockage of over 93% in his artery. They said it was so close that...
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wildthang86
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7
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2762
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is this to good to be true?
(Preview)
Okay, so I confronted my A Fiance, who has been drinking off and on since I met him. The only reason he stopped in the past was his DUI..SO-little background- He's got 4 DUI's went to treatment, 6 times I think. He at first said, no way I am not going to quit blah blah...then the next day(which was yesterd...
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lindseymommyof2
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9
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859
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The changing tide in my recovery
(Preview)
Family, I came across the following, which I wrote back in July 2008 [how time flies] and thought it worth posting again as I have kept it safe to happen upon it again someday. That someday is today: "Gratitude leads to humility - so I am told, and if that is the case then I need to make sure that my humi...
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Suzannah
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2
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846
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had an awful fright!
(Preview)
am back! been at AH's side for the past two days, nursing him back to health. oh yes! despite him wrecking the former marital home and destroying a lot of my possessions, and despite my being resolute that i could see no future for us, when he text me in the middle of the night saying he was really ill...
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miss lucy
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8
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968
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Snow In Alabama ???
(Preview)
Family, It doesn't snow in Alabama very often, but it is as I post. For those of you who are not aware, just the mention of snow in our forecast causes a stampede of grocery shoppers that wipe out every loaf of bread and every gallon of milk available while the rest of the world laughs at us. We treat 2&q...
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RLC
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8
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969
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Have A Wonderful Valentines Day
(Preview)
(((((Hello my Friends)))))). First of all Happy Valentines Day to all of you young at heart out there...and for those of you are still couples may you treasure these simple things in life....a card...a hug or even a happy valentines day wish from the one you love....... I have been having some sad mome...
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Andrea12
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5
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756
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Another little Gem that spoke right to my heart!
(Preview)
We do what it is that we think we not ought to hoping that we will get what it is that isn't possible! Curtesy of our very own Jerry F, ya just gotta love him to bit's, I do mwah x Katyx
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Katy
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2
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755
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Help with 3 C's
(Preview)
One of the three C's, anyway. Hi. I'm new, sponsorless, and hoping for a little guidance. I think I've got the "can't control it" and "can't cure it." It's just a matter of making it habitual in my day-to-day life. I'm having trouble, however, with the "didn't cause it.&qu...
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vlc
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11
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3400
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I took another small step for me....
(Preview)
First of all, thank you to everyone who offers ESH to me whenever I post, I take what I need and remember it when I'm going through things. I am so happy to have found this site, it keeps me grounded in between F2F meetings. My step.... tonight my Abf told me that he loves me. He had therapy today and appar...
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lizzakiss
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3
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562
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Where we are today
(Preview)
My daughter is going to treatment again. Her husband said they can talk with no promises on what thier future will be. I did go too the al-anon meeting here last night. To my surprise I am not alone. Our stories are different yet all the same. I could have written most of the posts others did. Last night I ju...
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Bluelady
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10
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925
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I'm doubting my actions
(Preview)
I've been in the al-anon program for seven months now and I had been told to try and hold off on any major decisions for the first year. Seven months ago my AH finally admitted he had a problem and saught help. This admission was made after about a month of me completely shutting him out.. He entered himsel...
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malady
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6
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895
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New here....
(Preview)
Hello. I am new here, but not new to Al Anon. Aside from being an alcoholic, my Father is very, very ill. I honestly do not know how is body is even functioning. He looks so sick. Every day I wonder if I will get "the call". I even have a hard time talking to him on the phone. He is really out of contr...
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bszab
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9
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776
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Trust
(Preview)
Greetings, You wil have to pardon me but I do not know all the acronyms for this forum as I am very new to understanding addiction and this forum. In fact this is my first outreach I guess you could say. My Husband is recovering from Achoholism and addiction to opiets. I am deeply in love with my husband...
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Rebecca 31003
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9
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909
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New Yorker article on alcohol
(Preview)
The current issue of the New Yorker has an interesting article on alcohol by Malcolm Gladwell (author of The Tipping Point, etc.) He talks about evidence for what alcohol really does. People have considered it a drug that lowers your inhibitions, but some researchers think that what it really doe...
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Mattie
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2
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878
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Rant
(Preview)
Ok, I know what I'm supposed to do in this situation and that's NOTHING. Mind my own business, keep my mouth shut, etc. But some days it's just so dang hard! That's why I'm posting here. I am so angry at my A. I'm so tired of doing almost everything around here by myself. Yes, some things can be let go if he d...
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pineapple
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4
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555
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hooks
(Preview)
My ABF is in recovery and we chat about the programme sometimes. He has started to identify how sick other people are in his family etc. It is lovely to watch him grow although I am keeping the focus on my recovery as I have so much work to do myself. Here is a good example. Before the A I was married for 1...
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Tracy
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3
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1201
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Irritability
(Preview)
I certainly hate having to put up with the tantrums that A's have when someone says no to them, at the moment I am curing my new stove which means burning all the black wax and excess polish off, all doors and windows are open as this is a process. A wanted to use a wire brush on new stove, categorically told h...
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maire rua
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4
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914
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ESH
(Preview)
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Codependent
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3
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802
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A ME Day!
(Preview)
I am married to a dry drunk who acts like a total jerk most of the time. Note to the alanon police, LOL, I didn't call him a jerk, I said he "ACTS" like a jerk most of the time, LOL. Anyway, LOL... I have adjusted, detached, and moved on emotionally for the most part, but at times his behavior is...
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MaryPoppins
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7
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521
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Where and how to draw the line
(Preview)
Yesterday for the first time in 17 years...I got the brunt of my A Father's anger. I know that I am not "exempt" from the anger. It's just that I haven't been one of his targets for a very long time. There were 12 years where we had no contact in between there. Anyways, I am really trying to set bou...
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bszab
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4
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887
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falling out of love
(Preview)
How do you stay in a relationship with an alcoholic? My fiance is a functional alcoholic, has 4 DWI's, three were before we met which we have been together 4 years...he got the fourth when my youngest was 2 months old and my oldest was 17 months..we were out of town and he got wasted rolled his truck. He dri...
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lindseymommyof2
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6
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1572
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Stress
(Preview)
All of the stresses are finally getting to me. The major one is financial. I don't even want to begin to think how we're going to handle all our financial problems when AH gets out of jail - the way it looks now, it's going to take YEARS to get back on track. Anyway, I find myself taking a lot of this out on m...
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N8SMOM
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7
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505
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A bit of an update
(Preview)
Hello family, I haven't posted in a while. Lots of things going on. A revelation of sorts has happened to me. I have spent alot of time in the last few months putting my focus on the ex. One thing I noticed is I go to fantasy land. Watching my thoughts I find while in this state, my thoughts are always on...
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fishinmama
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2
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543
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What I don't understand
(Preview)
I get what everyone is saying about enabling and I don't want too do that. My question is, it is very cold out, she has no place too live, she has a job but the money is all gone. If I give her money to live how can that be wrong? How can I say well you are on your own. Her husband is gone and I know in my heart he is not...
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Bluelady
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12
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1334
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