Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

mehere80 · mehere80

Hi All, New to these forums, been doing a lot of reading on here and it's just wonderful to find so many helpful posts. Reinforces that I am in the right spot. I just wanted to share a few of my ramblings, if for nothing other than to get them out of my head. First, I don't know exactly how to place my husband...

tired of trying · tired of trying

Mine is non existent which is better than when it was alcohol fueled and demeaning. Just wondering if that is the norm.

peacewithin · peacewithin

My AH smells so bad from his drinking I can't stand it any more. I work at a hospital and can take them smells but at home it seems to effect me more. He smokes outside but that bugs me too. The kids are older and out of school now but when they were in school they would want me to go with them coz dad smells t...

KLotus · KLotus

Hi All, I miss being here more often! But, I'm grateful for this forum. I have maintained a weekly meeting, sometimes two. Tonight I am going to put my best efforts into attending my second meeting this week! My AH (sober as of May 18), if you remember, has abandoned his meetings/program. Not drink...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

My AH is in rehab and I am now living with a friend who I have had for many years. Little did I know that she is an alcoholic as well. I am surrounded by sick people but I now understand why. It is my character qualities as well as defects that have led me to the life I now have. All these sick people around me...

Pushka · Pushka

I messed up really bad .. I don't know what else to call it outside of my stuff here on the site was read. I shouldn't have disclosed so much on the site, I don't know how to talk any other way. I've been in and out of therapy since I was 9, I grew up thinking everyone talked this way and this is how we talked at h...

amills4294 · amills4294

feel like I should post as part of my recovery process. I couldn't get to my normal face to face meeting last night and I couldn't attend online either. Maybe tonight. My spouse and I are still separated. We did have a good holiday with our daughter and respective families. In isolated moments lik...

surfgirl123 · surfgirl123

Was on vacation last week, no internet or phone use so am now getting caught up. When my AH agreed to go on vacation with my family months ago he was happy and excited about it. Well, within minutes of getting to our destination last week he was awful. Complained the whole time, said he didn't want to be th...

KimK · KimK

So, I am taking a bath, and my husband decides that we need to talk. So, I ask him about what and he starts rattling off problems.. I lost my cool for a short moment....nothing extreme. I believe he wants me to quit school. He makes Plenty of money, but is making me feel guilty about bills. We have no extra bi...

lookingup · lookingup

i tend to at times or most times when he is sober get all wrapped up in him cause i love him so much,but i do indeed need to work on my own happiness and like my freind told me the other day that i do need to not stop what im been doing before he came back into my life like going to church and visiting with my freinds...

orchidlover · orchidlover

Every day I write a gratitude list. My sponsor suggested this quite a while ago which of course filled me with resentment! So everyday is an opportunity to give thanks. A lot has shifted for me since then. Suggestions can sometimes be pretty hard to implement but I'm very glad I finally got to do thi...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Rodney and I corresponded fairly frequently over the last year since I joined MIP. I am really saddened by his passing. I have spent some time this morning reading through his private messages to me and there is so much wisdom and serenity there, and I wanted to share some of what he offered me here to eve...

CamaroGirl · CamaroGirl

So ABF is in recovery and has been out of rehab 10 days. He really hasn't been alone because he's not been comfortable enough with himself. So tomorrow is his first day back to work. He is a nervous wreck because he will have to pass two liquor stores twice tomorrow. I have faith he can do it without sto...

richie · richie

hello all. this is my second attempt to open a conversation - my first post was flagged as spam... anyways i'll start with good morning :). i've been attending alanon for a couple of months now. i think that my brother may have a drinking/drugging problem. there's not much information about sibling...

PLEASE READ! NEW MEMBER INTRODUCTION · KARMA

I begin this introduction with a sad face because that's how I feel right now, sad and worried. I've recently come to realize that my 31 year old son is an alcoholic. He drinks because he has social phobia. He tries quitting, only to start again. He is very lonely, but is extremely shy without alcoh...

pepodwyer · pepodwyer

Hello, I'm Laurie D. I have posted here before only once or twice. I have an alcoholic brother who lives in Japan. We pretty much have had no communication for over a year, when he came for my younger brother's funeral. My younger brother was 40 and died of menengitis. It was tragic, because he seeme...

Minaret · Minaret

Hi, I am fairly new here and as I described in an earlier post, I have an Active A, my husband. Each day is up and down, one day good, one day horrible. It went that way this holiday weekend. AH and I went to a friends house for Thanksgiving. They drank a lot of beer, but it went ok. No tempers flared. Next...

_heather_ · _heather_

I think I have decided to completely remove myself and give my AH time for his own recovery. I don't think I am ready to really accept everything that comes along with the disease. It is so hard for me but I think it might be what's best. It hurts to walk away especially after everything that I have been th...

KimK · KimK

This one has been following me around for many years....Every time I read it, something new jumps out at me...I can be in the best of moods, and read this, and I cry....always....Lately, though, its been a healing cry....Maybe...acceptance??? I just know that this one always gets to me.. The Pain S...

Debilyn · Debilyn

All I asked was if she intended to keep MY deceased husbands last name. I got back a message full of typical A stuff. So I just answered in good Al Anon fashion. Was fun using my tools. ex. OH that would be how an A tries to get the attention off them. mmm most A's do not relate to how non A's can take med. and not b...

atheos · atheos

It's been several months since my first, tearful "I don't think Al-Anon can work for me because I'm an atheist" post. I'm glad I stayed. I didn't find religion, and nobody tried to make me. Instead, I found human potential. There is so much badness in the world that it is easy to forget how muc...

MrsHennepope · MrsHennepope

I wish I was posting from a happy place this morning but that's not how my day started out My AH works nights so he sleeps till mid afternoon on Saturdays.This morning I found the typical mess in the kitchen,beer bottles and remnants of food he prepared for himself which I'm used to.Then I heard him get u...

rehprof · rehprof

i am a single mom, in the process of divorcing my AH, have 2 kids 9 and 15. I work 60+ hours a week and try to keep the household running. this morning I am feeling overwhelmed and very alone. I have mountains of work facing me at home and at work, and honestly i just want to crawl in a hole and not come out. I don'...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Haven't been here in a while, and have found the longer I am away the harder it is to come back because I have so much to say! Then, twice now, I finally wrote my post, hit an unknown control and deleted it all. Aaahhhh! Work, kids, and pure exhaustion pretty much sum up why I haven't been here, though every s...

shimo · shimo

I am unable to honor my commitment to chair the Al-Anon Meeting this morning, November 28. My father is in emergency at the hospital and I will be with him. Sorry for the short notice. Hoping someone will step up and chair the meeting for me. Thanks, Shimo/aka Jeri

Pushka · Pushka

I'm really struggling with my AH and his attitude at the moment. The only thing I can think is he really thought the trip wasn't going to happen and I asked for a suitcase that is some place I have NO idea where. I got hit with his attitude. It was like being physically back handed. I booked a flight from...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

My wife invited me to attend an AA meeting while we were up with her family for the holiday. It was an amazing experience and if you have the opportunity, I highly recommend it. I don't know exactly why, but for some reason, attending this meeting really helped bring a lot into focus for me. We had a very n...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I had Thanksgiving at my house yesterday and invited my exAH. I had it later in the day and I had invited my best friend and her baby too, but I was sick and she didn't want to chance her lil guy getting sick. So my 13 year old and I prepared a stuffed turkey, mashed potatoes, candied yams, green bean cassero...

Mr44 · Mr44

New to this. Wife is in rehab 3rd time in 18 mos. This has torn the family apart. I am worried when she comes home again. Her drink is vodka and hard to detect. I typically react in a negative way. She drinks to pass out. Any help out there.

oldergal · oldergal

I once met a man who was raised in a village of 100 or so people. This village was a 20 min airplane ride from any town, by boat it was a little longer. I met him when he was trying to get sober. He said he had been drinking since he was 10 yrs old, and was now in his late 50's. a short guy with a permanent smile on his...

lookingup · lookingup

me and my a r back together for real now he has cut down on his alcohol still drinks everynight just cut back on how much but still theres that changed behavior in him the other personality comes out ,the mouthy one he is trying soo hard to do right and is doing good he wants us to make it work so much as i do also...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I feel like I might post too much sometimes but the way I am I have so much to say. I almost always feel better when I post. Sometimes I don't feel that way in meetings & I have attended thousands of meetings. Today is a good day! Always tired but getting a lot accomplished! I spent my morning getting eve...

atheos · atheos

Just got to spend this afternoon with mine after not seeing her for a while... it was like receiving a serenity transfusion! Life feels much less overwhelming than it did this morning.

tired of trying · tired of trying

My husband is sober right now-partially due to a court order. He goes to meetings but his thinking/behavior is so erratic it almost seems like he has a form of dementia-we've been together for over 35 years-through good times and bad but this not knowing is hard. He also has high blood pressure and has s...

John · John

On another MIP board there was a question asking how and when does someone forgive themselves, for sometimes that is a struggle for us. I was asked by another double winner to place my reply to that question on this board because they felt more people needed to read it... so here it is. ****************...

ladysoblue · ladysoblue

My mom told me about an amazing TED talk today, and I got so much out of this video that I wanted to share it with people here. It's about gratitude, and I understand that we should seek to be thankful about something every day, so this was a good reminder for me today... I hope you enjoy it too. See: http://...

Generic Writer · Generic Writer

http://www.genericwriter.com/2011/09/25/the-12-things-i-learned-in-al-anon/

danni · danni

I'm feeling sad this morning and fighting the urge to slip into self pity mode. I think it comes down to me having trouble accepting that things are just not going to be the way I want, and I keep reminding myself to let go and let God. I'm just about to finish the first step, and I am still in so much pain, more...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

My girls are going with their Dad to his parents and I had an invite, but like last year I just don't feel like it is right. We are divorced and I would rather not confuse the situation and I didn't even feel like I had to explain myself this year, I just bowed out gracefully. We all live in a tiny community s...

souljoy · souljoy

My AH has been sober three years. Everything seemed to be going on okay and then a situation happened in the family and my son DIL and 8 month old moved in about two months ago. I guess the stress of the new family in the crowded house and no time alone has upped his symptoms of anxiety, isolation. tirednes...

ladysoblue · ladysoblue

So this is the first week that I'm identifying myself as an "alanon person". I had a major blowout (a drunk night) with my AH on Monday, found this board, thank God, went to my first alanon meeting on Wednesday, and now am having another drunk night with my AH tonight. (Not me; him.) What a w...

oldergal · oldergal

I invited my son to Thanksgiving dinner, he never showed and wrote me this email. Before I respond, I would like some ESH, if anyone has any for me. This email tells me I have lots more work to do on "Acceptance". Am I missing anything else? I don't want to mention all the times when he has had me w...

odalis · odalis

Hello everyone. I haven't been here ina while, but I've been reading taking care of myself. Can too much of caring about yourself, too much self esteem be harmful, or am I just not comfortable doing it? In my unconscious do I want to convert back to my old ways....please share your experience. the reaso...

Jes · Jes

Do I wait to see if they tell me? I am in a LDR and very involved in my partners life. Last night on the phone it was pretty obvious to me some drinking had occured. I have been un-able to get to an Al-Anon meeting yet. I just don't know if its appropriate to ask if they had a drink or do I wait it out until they deci...

CamaroGirl · CamaroGirl

I am new to this site and new to all of this actually. I had never dealt with alcoholism until this past year. I fell in love with an alcoholic who is now in recovery. This will be day 19 for him without a drink. Right now everything is so different. He's happy and smiling. He's not angry and quick to lose...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I put the post in capital letters because I really have something to say! I was in an open AA meeting last night after our wonderful Thanksgiving meal. Anyhow I will get to the point. I was reading the AA promises found in the Big Book of AA & found myself choking up! I am definitely in the "spirit...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

metaphysical law of attraction and subject reality. Just so you know, this is a post of metaphysical ponderings of philosophy that work for me..... some will agree and some will think this is total bolony... take what you like and leave the rest. Subjective reality is a belief system in which (1) the...

jamfu · jamfu

I feel terrible right now

mrw60 · mrw60

I don't know what to do. My mother is an alcoholic and I don't know how to help her. She's 68 years old, weighs less than 100lbs and when she goes on binges will kill a 12-pack in a couple of hours. This has been going on for 10 years. It used to only happen every couple of months and just started becoming mo...

mdkm0726 · mdkm0726

My daughter is a serious addict and has very little waking time during the days and she has 3 small children, 1 4yr and 2 5yr olds. She had no electric and heat for several weeks, Because it was getting so cold I called DFS. According to the worker, I was not alone. My daughter and her children were miss...

rosielee · rosielee

that alcoholics are basically inept people- defunct and incapable of relationships that are healthy and nurturing- (well- in my experience that is) and when the result of this manifests itself...they go on the attack. its not really the fact that youve left your cereal bowl out and havent washed...

tlynna · tlynna

Hi all. Thanksgiving is coming, ready or not. Give me strength to be strong and ensure that I don't contribute to any imbibing on the part of my AH. How does one weigh keeping the peace (being an enabler) versus standing strong (resulting in his anger perhaps directed at others, ruining their holid...

Lily wife · Lily wife

okay- I need some advice! My husband use to drink A LOT, but has lately "cut back". We have been together for 9 years and just got married in September. He's always making comments that make me feel as though he doesn't like his lifestyle now (even before we got married). We've had NUMEROUS ar...

danni · danni

so my ah just woke up hung over. I was expecting it. I had a nice morning with my kids. I was prepared to detatch from it. I did my readings. Made a phone call. I was READY. Then I heard his stuffy voice and smelled the air in the bedroom and all my empathy and understanding just went out the window. si...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I'm missing RLC today...saw a couple of guys around my work today that reminded me of him facially. I felt more gratitude than sadness and then still there was some reality we won't be sharing a phone call anytime soon. But Wait!! my HP is cunning, powerful and baffling!! I'll just stay with the tho...

Doozy · Doozy

Hi all, I want to say welcome to the newbies. I wish I could write individual welcomes to everyone. Please do know you are so welcome and I appreciate learning from everyone here! Wow, the holidays are a crazy time. This is my first set of holidays after beginning Alanon. I am no longer with my qualifier...

oldergal · oldergal

I want to wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving. Please don't feel alone. I too will probably be alone, I have texted my A-Son and sent him 2 emails, but still have not heard from him. I will go ahead and cook turkey because I love to eat turkey and have leftovers. I know for sure I am growing in character and sel...

tommyecat · tommyecat

To each and everyone on on this board, I wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving. I can find gratitude in so many things today regardless if my loved ones are drinking. Today I am grateful to everyone who share openly and support the MIP forum through topic contributions or replying to the posts. I contin...

Pushka · Pushka

Last night was a very beautiful meeting. I don't know how others do their meetings the week of Thanksgiving, I've never experienced this before. There was a candle light meeting (it was tea candles .. lol), and we all went around the room and shared what we were grateful for this past year and blew our...

likemyheart · likemyheart

My mom thinks I should travel the Gorge (icky drive, icky weather, long too) in order to have Thanksgiving down there. No thanks. Last year I decided to do it the way I wanted to. Simple eh? I will cook a turkey covered with bacon; mashed potatoes with butter and cream cheese (no milk); gravy with lots of m...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Losing the love...Detaching...Reality (Preview) Hi All, New to these forums, been doing a lot of reading on here and it's just wonderful to find so many helpful posts. Reinforces that I am in the right spot. I just wanted to share a few of my ramblings, if for nothing other than to get them out of my head. First, I don't know exactly how to place my husband...	mehere80	11	648	Nov 30, 2011 by Michelle814
	How has alcoholism affected your sex life? (Preview) Mine is non existent which is better than when it was alcohol fueled and demeaning. Just wondering if that is the norm.	tired of trying	20	948	Nov 30, 2011 by tired of trying
	How Do You Live With This (Preview) My AH smells so bad from his drinking I can't stand it any more. I work at a hospital and can take them smells but at home it seems to effect me more. He smokes outside but that bugs me too. The kids are older and out of school now but when they were in school they would want me to go with them coz dad smells t...	peacewithin	6	453	Nov 30, 2011 by peacewithin
	Still plugging away (Preview) Hi All, I miss being here more often! But, I'm grateful for this forum. I have maintained a weekly meeting, sometimes two. Tonight I am going to put my best efforts into attending my second meeting this week! My AH (sober as of May 18), if you remember, has abandoned his meetings/program. Not drink...	KLotus	4	491	Nov 30, 2011 by Doozy
	Growing and Changing, ODAAT (Preview) My AH is in rehab and I am now living with a friend who I have had for many years. Little did I know that she is an alcoholic as well. I am surrounded by sick people but I now understand why. It is my character qualities as well as defects that have led me to the life I now have. All these sick people around me...	Michelle814	4	362	Nov 30, 2011 by Doozy
	I messed up ... (Preview) I messed up really bad .. I don't know what else to call it outside of my stuff here on the site was read. I shouldn't have disclosed so much on the site, I don't know how to talk any other way. I've been in and out of therapy since I was 9, I grew up thinking everyone talked this way and this is how we talked at h...	Pushka	13	700	Nov 30, 2011 by Doozy
	Still here. ODAT (Preview) feel like I should post as part of my recovery process. I couldn't get to my normal face to face meeting last night and I couldn't attend online either. Maybe tonight. My spouse and I are still separated. We did have a good holiday with our daughter and respective families. In isolated moments lik...	amills4294	5	474	Nov 29, 2011 by GreenerGrass
	Vacation - Anything But! (Preview) Was on vacation last week, no internet or phone use so am now getting caught up. When my AH agreed to go on vacation with my family months ago he was happy and excited about it. Well, within minutes of getting to our destination last week he was awful. Complained the whole time, said he didn't want to be th...	surfgirl123	3	342	Nov 29, 2011 by KimK
	he has a heart? (Preview) So, I am taking a bath, and my husband decides that we need to talk. So, I ask him about what and he starts rattling off problems.. I lost my cool for a short moment....nothing extreme. I believe he wants me to quit school. He makes Plenty of money, but is making me feel guilty about bills. We have no extra bi...	KimK	7	591	Nov 29, 2011 by KimK
	thanx for the esh,i did indeed need it, (Preview) i tend to at times or most times when he is sober get all wrapped up in him cause i love him so much,but i do indeed need to work on my own happiness and like my freind told me the other day that i do need to not stop what im been doing before he came back into my life like going to church and visiting with my freinds...	lookingup	2	428	Nov 29, 2011 by orchidlover
	Thankfullness every day (Preview) Every day I write a gratitude list. My sponsor suggested this quite a while ago which of course filled me with resentment! So everyday is an opportunity to give thanks. A lot has shifted for me since then. Suggestions can sometimes be pretty hard to implement but I'm very glad I finally got to do thi...	orchidlover	7	657	Nov 29, 2011 by orchidlover
	What Rodney taught me (Preview) Rodney and I corresponded fairly frequently over the last year since I joined MIP. I am really saddened by his passing. I have spent some time this morning reading through his private messages to me and there is so much wisdom and serenity there, and I wanted to share some of what he offered me here to eve...	usedtobeanyer	8	590	Nov 29, 2011 by orchidlover
	His first day back to work (Preview) So ABF is in recovery and has been out of rehab 10 days. He really hasn't been alone because he's not been comfortable enough with himself. So tomorrow is his first day back to work. He is a nervous wreck because he will have to pass two liquor stores twice tomorrow. I have faith he can do it without sto...	CamaroGirl	4	399	Nov 29, 2011 by CamaroGirl
	o brother (Preview) hello all. this is my second attempt to open a conversation - my first post was flagged as spam... anyways i'll start with good morning :). i've been attending alanon for a couple of months now. i think that my brother may have a drinking/drugging problem. there's not much information about sibling...	richie	10	485	Nov 29, 2011 by richie
	PLEASE READ! NEW MEMBER INTRODUCTION (Preview) I begin this introduction with a sad face because that's how I feel right now, sad and worried. I've recently come to realize that my 31 year old son is an alcoholic. He drinks because he has social phobia. He tries quitting, only to start again. He is very lonely, but is extremely shy without alcoh...	KARMA	9	757	Nov 29, 2011 by KARMA
	Hello (Preview) Hello, I'm Laurie D. I have posted here before only once or twice. I have an alcoholic brother who lives in Japan. We pretty much have had no communication for over a year, when he came for my younger brother's funeral. My younger brother was 40 and died of menengitis. It was tragic, because he seeme...	pepodwyer	2	504	Nov 28, 2011 by Debilyn
	I confronted my parents (Preview) Hi, I am fairly new here and as I described in an earlier post, I have an Active A, my husband. Each day is up and down, one day good, one day horrible. It went that way this holiday weekend. AH and I went to a friends house for Thanksgiving. They drank a lot of beer, but it went ok. No tempers flared. Next...	Minaret	6	662	Nov 28, 2011 by danni
	Separation Anxiety (Preview) I think I have decided to completely remove myself and give my AH time for his own recovery. I don't think I am ready to really accept everything that comes along with the disease. It is so hard for me but I think it might be what's best. It hurts to walk away especially after everything that I have been th...	_heather_	9	710	Nov 28, 2011 by Michelle814
	The Pain Stops when... (Preview) This one has been following me around for many years....Every time I read it, something new jumps out at me...I can be in the best of moods, and read this, and I cry....always....Lately, though, its been a healing cry....Maybe...acceptance??? I just know that this one always gets to me.. The Pain S...	KimK	12	1155	Nov 28, 2011 by skinnyme40
	Confronting EX DIL A, nasty little pill she is (Preview) All I asked was if she intended to keep MY deceased husbands last name. I got back a message full of typical A stuff. So I just answered in good Al Anon fashion. Was fun using my tools. ex. OH that would be how an A tries to get the attention off them. mmm most A's do not relate to how non A's can take med. and not b...	Debilyn	0	796	Nov 28, 2011 by Debilyn
	Random Al-Anon atheist musings (Preview) It's been several months since my first, tearful "I don't think Al-Anon can work for me because I'm an atheist" post. I'm glad I stayed. I didn't find religion, and nobody tried to make me. Instead, I found human potential. There is so much badness in the world that it is easy to forget how muc...	atheos	7	1406	Nov 28, 2011 by Hoot Nanny
	Bad Morning (Preview) I wish I was posting from a happy place this morning but that's not how my day started out My AH works nights so he sleeps till mid afternoon on Saturdays.This morning I found the typical mess in the kitchen,beer bottles and remnants of food he prepared for himself which I'm used to.Then I heard him get u...	MrsHennepope	15	819	Nov 28, 2011 by MrsHennepope
	got no bootstraps (Preview) i am a single mom, in the process of divorcing my AH, have 2 kids 9 and 15. I work 60+ hours a week and try to keep the household running. this morning I am feeling overwhelmed and very alone. I have mountains of work facing me at home and at work, and honestly i just want to crawl in a hole and not come out. I don'...	rehprof	11	641	Nov 28, 2011 by stephaniej
	Wow... cause I have no idea what else to call this (Preview) Haven't been here in a while, and have found the longer I am away the harder it is to come back because I have so much to say! Then, twice now, I finally wrote my post, hit an unknown control and deleted it all. Aaahhhh! Work, kids, and pure exhaustion pretty much sum up why I haven't been here, though every s...	Loupiness	2	430	Nov 28, 2011 by GailMichelle
	MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MEETING (Preview) I am unable to honor my commitment to chair the Al-Anon Meeting this morning, November 28. My father is in emergency at the hospital and I will be with him. Sorry for the short notice. Hoping someone will step up and chair the meeting for me. Thanks, Shimo/aka Jeri	shimo	0	314	Nov 28, 2011 by shimo
	Pre trip stress (Preview) I'm really struggling with my AH and his attitude at the moment. The only thing I can think is he really thought the trip wasn't going to happen and I asked for a suitcase that is some place I have NO idea where. I got hit with his attitude. It was like being physically back handed. I booked a flight from...	Pushka	7	688	Nov 28, 2011 by hawaiilover
	Went to my first AA meeting (Preview) My wife invited me to attend an AA meeting while we were up with her family for the holiday. It was an amazing experience and if you have the opportunity, I highly recommend it. I don't know exactly why, but for some reason, attending this meeting really helped bring a lot into focus for me. We had a very n...	usedtobeanyer	7	691	Nov 28, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	My Thanksgiving (Preview) I had Thanksgiving at my house yesterday and invited my exAH. I had it later in the day and I had invited my best friend and her baby too, but I was sick and she didn't want to chance her lil guy getting sick. So my 13 year old and I prepared a stuffed turkey, mashed potatoes, candied yams, green bean cassero...	Breakingfree	6	481	Nov 27, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Relapse U (Preview) New to this. Wife is in rehab 3rd time in 18 mos. This has torn the family apart. I am worried when she comes home again. Her drink is vodka and hard to detect. I typically react in a negative way. She drinks to pass out. Any help out there.	Mr44	9	733	Nov 27, 2011 by GailMichelle
	A TRUE STORY...... (Preview) I once met a man who was raised in a village of 100 or so people. This village was a 20 min airplane ride from any town, by boat it was a little longer. I met him when he was trying to get sober. He said he had been drinking since he was 10 yrs old, and was now in his late 50's. a short guy with a permanent smile on his...	oldergal	6	742	Nov 27, 2011 by GailMichelle
	hello alanon freinds,heres my update (Preview) me and my a r back together for real now he has cut down on his alcohol still drinks everynight just cut back on how much but still theres that changed behavior in him the other personality comes out ,the mouthy one he is trying soo hard to do right and is doing good he wants us to make it work so much as i do also...	lookingup	3	441	Nov 27, 2011 by Breakingfree
	it seems like I am ALWAYS posting! (Preview) I feel like I might post too much sometimes but the way I am I have so much to say. I almost always feel better when I post. Sometimes I don't feel that way in meetings & I have attended thousands of meetings. Today is a good day! Always tired but getting a lot accomplished! I spent my morning getting eve...	Hoot Nanny	3	817	Nov 27, 2011 by tommyecat
	Sponsors are wonderful (Preview) Just got to spend this afternoon with mine after not seeing her for a while... it was like receiving a serenity transfusion! Life feels much less overwhelming than it did this morning.	atheos	4	421	Nov 27, 2011 by tommyecat
	What is your Experience with Dry Drunks (Preview) My husband is sober right now-partially due to a court order. He goes to meetings but his thinking/behavior is so erratic it almost seems like he has a form of dementia-we've been together for over 35 years-through good times and bad but this not knowing is hard. He also has high blood pressure and has s...	tired of trying	14	737	Nov 27, 2011 by tired of trying
	Self Forgiveness... (Preview) On another MIP board there was a question asking how and when does someone forgive themselves, for sometimes that is a struggle for us. I was asked by another double winner to place my reply to that question on this board because they felt more people needed to read it... so here it is. ****************...	John	5	1210	Nov 26, 2011 by mdkm0726
	Something I want to share about Gratitude (Preview) My mom told me about an amazing TED talk today, and I got so much out of this video that I wanted to share it with people here. It's about gratitude, and I understand that we should seek to be thankful about something every day, so this was a good reminder for me today... I hope you enjoy it too. See: http://...	ladysoblue	3	2714	Nov 26, 2011 by mdkm0726
	The 12 Things I Learned In Al-Anon... (Preview) http://www.genericwriter.com/2011/09/25/the-12-things-i-learned-in-al-anon/	Generic Writer	5	991	Nov 26, 2011 by mdkm0726
	Feeling sad (Preview) I'm feeling sad this morning and fighting the urge to slip into self pity mode. I think it comes down to me having trouble accepting that things are just not going to be the way I want, and I keep reminding myself to let go and let God. I'm just about to finish the first step, and I am still in so much pain, more...	danni	6	613	Nov 26, 2011 by Pushka
	Choosing to be alone for Thanksgiving (Preview) My girls are going with their Dad to his parents and I had an invite, but like last year I just don't feel like it is right. We are divorced and I would rather not confuse the situation and I didn't even feel like I had to explain myself this year, I just bowed out gracefully. We all live in a tiny community s...	Breakingfree	7	521	Nov 26, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Sigh (Preview) My AH has been sober three years. Everything seemed to be going on okay and then a situation happened in the family and my son DIL and 8 month old moved in about two months ago. I guess the stress of the new family in the crowded house and no time alone has upped his symptoms of anxiety, isolation. tirednes...	souljoy	3	486	Nov 26, 2011 by tired of trying
	Here we are again (and again and again) (Preview) So this is the first week that I'm identifying myself as an "alanon person". I had a major blowout (a drunk night) with my AH on Monday, found this board, thank God, went to my first alanon meeting on Wednesday, and now am having another drunk night with my AH tonight. (Not me; him.) What a w...	ladysoblue	6	707	Nov 26, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Sad Email From My Son on Thanksgiving (Preview) I invited my son to Thanksgiving dinner, he never showed and wrote me this email. Before I respond, I would like some ESH, if anyone has any for me. This email tells me I have lots more work to do on "Acceptance". Am I missing anything else? I don't want to mention all the times when he has had me w...	oldergal	10	807	Nov 26, 2011 by Loupiness
	is there a such thing as too much "caring about yourself" (Preview) Hello everyone. I haven't been here ina while, but I've been reading taking care of myself. Can too much of caring about yourself, too much self esteem be harmful, or am I just not comfortable doing it? In my unconscious do I want to convert back to my old ways....please share your experience. the reaso...	odalis	11	674	Nov 26, 2011 by Pushka
	Alcoholic Partner Sober 8 days in AA. Can I ask them if they had a drink (day 9) or?? (Preview) Do I wait to see if they tell me? I am in a LDR and very involved in my partners life. Last night on the phone it was pretty obvious to me some drinking had occured. I have been un-able to get to an Al-Anon meeting yet. I just don't know if its appropriate to ask if they had a drink or do I wait it out until they deci...	Jes	12	769	Nov 26, 2011 by tommyecat
	New here (Preview) I am new to this site and new to all of this actually. I had never dealt with alcoholism until this past year. I fell in love with an alcoholic who is now in recovery. This will be day 19 for him without a drink. Right now everything is so different. He's happy and smiling. He's not angry and quick to lose...	CamaroGirl	11	464	Nov 26, 2011 by CamaroGirl
	ANOTHER SPIRITUAL AWAKENING! (Preview) I put the post in capital letters because I really have something to say! I was in an open AA meeting last night after our wonderful Thanksgiving meal. Anyhow I will get to the point. I was reading the AA promises found in the Big Book of AA & found myself choking up! I am definitely in the "spirit...	Hoot Nanny	3	709	Nov 26, 2011 by tommyecat
	metaphysical law of attraction (Preview) metaphysical law of attraction and subject reality. Just so you know, this is a post of metaphysical ponderings of philosophy that work for me..... some will agree and some will think this is total bolony... take what you like and leave the rest. Subjective reality is a belief system in which (1) the...	Lindaoakford	6	4433	Nov 26, 2011 by souljoy
	alone (Preview) I feel terrible right now	jamfu	8	430	Nov 25, 2011 by Breakingfree
	crying for two days (Preview) I don't know what to do. My mother is an alcoholic and I don't know how to help her. She's 68 years old, weighs less than 100lbs and when she goes on binges will kill a 12-pack in a couple of hours. This has been going on for 10 years. It used to only happen every couple of months and just started becoming mo...	mrw60	12	571	Nov 25, 2011 by zeninator
	My Addict daughter with 3 small children - Update (Preview) My daughter is a serious addict and has very little waking time during the days and she has 3 small children, 1 4yr and 2 5yr olds. She had no electric and heat for several weeks, Because it was getting so cold I called DFS. According to the worker, I was not alone. My daughter and her children were miss...	mdkm0726	8	656	Nov 25, 2011 by pinkchip
	i get it now (Preview) that alcoholics are basically inept people- defunct and incapable of relationships that are healthy and nurturing- (well- in my experience that is) and when the result of this manifests itself...they go on the attack. its not really the fact that youve left your cereal bowl out and havent washed...	rosielee	8	505	Nov 25, 2011 by rosielee
	Loving my AH this Thanksgiving (Preview) Hi all. Thanksgiving is coming, ready or not. Give me strength to be strong and ensure that I don't contribute to any imbibing on the part of my AH. How does one weigh keeping the peace (being an enabler) versus standing strong (resulting in his anger perhaps directed at others, ruining their holid...	tlynna	6	676	Nov 25, 2011 by tired of trying
	husband's lieing about drinking (Preview) okay- I need some advice! My husband use to drink A LOT, but has lately "cut back". We have been together for 9 years and just got married in September. He's always making comments that make me feel as though he doesn't like his lifestyle now (even before we got married). We've had NUMEROUS ar...	Lily wife	15	701	Nov 25, 2011 by tired of trying
	another hangover this morning (Preview) so my ah just woke up hung over. I was expecting it. I had a nice morning with my kids. I was prepared to detatch from it. I did my readings. Made a phone call. I was READY. Then I heard his stuffy voice and smelled the air in the bedroom and all my empathy and understanding just went out the window. si...	danni	6	416	Nov 25, 2011 by danni
	Missing Rod... (Preview) I'm missing RLC today...saw a couple of guys around my work today that reminded me of him facially. I felt more gratitude than sadness and then still there was some reality we won't be sharing a phone call anytime soon. But Wait!! my HP is cunning, powerful and baffling!! I'll just stay with the tho...	Jerry F	11	641	Nov 25, 2011 by lacewing
	irritated (Preview) Hi all, I want to say welcome to the newbies. I wish I could write individual welcomes to everyone. Please do know you are so welcome and I appreciate learning from everyone here! Wow, the holidays are a crazy time. This is my first set of holidays after beginning Alanon. I am no longer with my qualifier...	Doozy	11	672	Nov 25, 2011 by Doozy
	For All Those Alone This Thanksgiving (Preview) I want to wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving. Please don't feel alone. I too will probably be alone, I have texted my A-Son and sent him 2 emails, but still have not heard from him. I will go ahead and cook turkey because I love to eat turkey and have leftovers. I know for sure I am growing in character and sel...	oldergal	15	521	Nov 24, 2011 by oldergal
	Happy Thanksgiving (Preview) To each and everyone on on this board, I wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving. I can find gratitude in so many things today regardless if my loved ones are drinking. Today I am grateful to everyone who share openly and support the MIP forum through topic contributions or replying to the posts. I contin...	tommyecat	8	581	Nov 24, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Gratitude Meeting :) (Preview) Last night was a very beautiful meeting. I don't know how others do their meetings the week of Thanksgiving, I've never experienced this before. There was a candle light meeting (it was tea candles .. lol), and we all went around the room and shared what we were grateful for this past year and blew our...	Pushka	2	486	Nov 24, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Thanksgiving Musings (Preview) My mom thinks I should travel the Gorge (icky drive, icky weather, long too) in order to have Thanksgiving down there. No thanks. Last year I decided to do it the way I wanted to. Simple eh? I will cook a turkey covered with bacon; mashed potatoes with butter and cream cheese (no milk); gravy with lots of m...	likemyheart	13	625	Nov 24, 2011 by likemyheart
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.