Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Summerseeker · Summerseeker

Why are alcoholics manipulative? Why do they berate, insult and try to make others feel guilty? What is the best course of action when they do this? Thank You.

SecondChance · SecondChance

Hi out there! I have never before dealt with anyone seriously affected by alcoholism. I will say, I have enocuntered certain struggles with some close family members and friends that may over-indulge from time to time, however never someone who is an active AA member and currently dealing with his...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

For the first time in many many years, I have 2 overdraft charges on our checking account. Now, I know I have been lax about taking care of stuff but when I checked the account I realized that AH had been taking out extra cash on debits wherever he went. He basically took out around 400-500 in the past 10 d...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I shared that I was in a relationship that has been going over ten years. We have never met face to face. Just everyway else to communicate. Best friends, confidants, all very moral and great. It started feeling different. Growing like I suppose we all wish would happen in our lives. But still is fine ju...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. Today, I received a call from my father. He hadn't been to work in the last little while and today he said he went to go see his doctor. His doctor put him on anti-depressant medication because he is depressed. he called to tell me tha...

TrudyS85 · TrudyS85

I have been trying to work on myself. After deciding it was time to divorce my AH , he decided it was time to convince me he could change. He really had me going there for a while, I was allowing myself to believe him. We were having good talks, had a nice 'date' out and then it came up in a conversation that I di...

Lyne · Lyne

Ya know, my spouse is promising again to change. I think everytime she makes these promises she actually plans to do it. But in a week or two, she is right back to the old tricks. I told her she's not changing because she doesn't want to. It's me that wants things different. I no longer believe she wil...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Well...as you can see I am on here again after yesterday. Good news can travel fast. I am so glad that I don't have to worry about my health. God is in control. Just yesterday someone famous mentioned that she had thyroid cancer & one of my FB friends just had an operation to remove her thyroid for the s...

sweetyhide · sweetyhide

I have been reading here as often as work allows and decided it was time to introduce myself. I am a survivor of addiction. Both parents were alcoholics and my mother died from cirrhosis. Both of my brothers are drug addicts, also. I have been married for 26 years to an alcoholic and drug addict that now...

aprilla · aprilla

After heading down to my first meeting yesterday, I felt a mixture of relief and confusion. I feel I belong there, but Most if not all were still with their partners that have stopped their addictions. I am not, at least not physically. I find that I am still trapped in both mentally and emotionally. E...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I know this topic has come up many, many times here, but I'm hoping to re-visit it with your ESH, as I try to examine my own motives. My AH has three DUIs. Because now, he does most of his drinking at home after work (and he works until 11 p.m.), he is not in the environment he used to be in before we were toget...

Maxine12stepper · Maxine12stepper

Hello my MIP family, I am so happy to tell you guys im going to my first F2F meeting on sunday!! and boy do I need it, I had an awful day yesterday and decided to call up the al anon head office in london to find any 'day' meetings in my area, there are two evening meetings near me that I just cant get to as I have t...

kkhinaustin · kkhinaustin

Hi everyone. I am new to this forum. My mother is 64, her parents were both alcoholics and she began drinking about 20 years ago when I was in high school. For the most part she is what I would call a relatively high functioning A- she went to work every day, was dependable for any social events, did...

katfshh · katfshh

I have a question. I know I feel the need to control things. I know that I get overwhelmed at times and feel stuck. So when it comes to a relationship, what does "let go, let God" mean exactly? I am attracted to A's. Always. My friend said we should go to a local sports pub the other day to try to mee...

tortuga · tortuga

dear all, if you like, please share with me how you deal with those emotioanl gaps in your life created by alcoholic behaviour. As we know it is not only the liquid itself, but the psychological behaviour connected to that disease. Looking back, my sight got clearer, I understand, I comprehend, I get n...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

It's just grief - all these changing feelings from one hour to the next due to my mother dying. It's becoming more real. I wonder how it will be, the funeral, people at the wake. I'm not sure we'll even have anyone due to the storm and people being the age they are. It could just be us. My sis in law will be as s...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I have self labeled myself this way today: resentful b*tch. At least, I am this in my own head. I have been working my program, working with my sponsor, forgiving as best as my heart knows how to, but something feels missing. I, at multiple times of the day, pray for my AH and tell my HP that I am giving AH...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

This morning I found out that my ultrasound is normal & that it seems that I don't have ovarian cancer. My arthritis doctor thought that was a possibility. Pardon me, but I sometimes think he is a quack! I want to stop seeing him so bad but he prescribes the medicine that lessens my pain. I feel like I a...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

Well I must say that this week has been a pretty good one for me and the AW. Tuesday night she went to bed early and I stayed up some and watched some TV. My 23 year old daughter called to check on our grandson, who was also sleeping. I had discussed the alcohol use with her mother a while back. Sadly I shou...

PP · PP

Hi everyone, I so appreciate your posts..they help me get in touch with my feelings and experience compassion for all of you and me. Often the last person I feel compassion for is me. I am hurting this morning and I look forward to attending an al anon group and a session with my therapist today. I am e...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I guess he feels that flowers solve all marriage problems, LOL! I'll gratefully take the flowers but we've got a long way to go and it's not going to get me to Costa Rica either. There are so many things that need to happen and flowers just don't cut the mustard. He kept asking me if I could receive mail h...

stephaniej · stephaniej

My husband summoned me downstairs to watch the President's acceptance speech, when he heard me get up to go to the bathroom. Of course, he had been drinking (like every night). Of course I have no idea how much he had been drinking, but of course he was displaying all his classic signs of being drunk. ...

Debilyn · Debilyn

TT's Mother passed. Our friend needs our prayers and love. She is a strong little lady, is in that grieving fog now. I know you all will send the all the love you can to her, mip sisters and brothers always do. thankyou, Debilyn

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha MIP Ohana (family) and good morning. It started out overcast, dark and wet from last nights rain. I wasn't in a very healthy mood until I clicked on here. Another sleepless night with the physical, emotional and mental pain from the police assault, one year to the date tomorrow increasing...

Niki · Niki

Hi- I'm new to this. I'm looking for some assistance on how to help my 9 year old daughter. Her father has been in recovery for approx 2 years (although I believe he is using marjiuana). He is verbally and emotionally abusive to me. He frequently over-reacts which results in our daughter suffering. We h...

Loubelou · Loubelou

Hi everyone, It's been a while since I've posted here (over a year I think) - I'm much more active on various chatrooms, but I really need a space to be brutally honest about what's going on right now, as I haven't felt able to tell ANYONE what's going on with us since my A and I got engaged last week. Bac...

Tony48183 · Tony48183

Mygf is a very bad alchalic she is in rehab now bc when we broke up se drank to a bal .45 and was taken to the hospital but I have been supporting Her thru this all when she wants help and set things in place like not being around when she drinks and sutch she had recintly told me about cheeting on me but i do know s...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey everyone, I recently became GR of my group and over the last few months (even prior to me being GR), our membership has gone down. We used to get approximately between 6-8 members regularly. Now, it is the same 3 people that come. 2 weeks ago, one member made a point of making a comment that the reason t...

Bird Seed · Bird Seed

Hello I'm new to the forum

I'd really appreciate some help, advice, feedback on my situation. I don't have anywhere else to turn. I have been with my Boyfriend for over 5 years, he was 22 when we met and drank a lot (a bottle of vodka most nights) but i put this down to being young, drinking with friends,...

HAguirre · HAguirre

So my A has been sober for over a year and i am still myserable. I dont know why. He is happy and okay and i am back to the begging of despair again. I still dont know how to let go of all the bad things he did in the past i never got a appology or acknowladgement of what he did or didnt do. I am struggling to allow him...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

There's been some odd awakening, well not odd but interesting awakening in my A friend since we saw Flight. He has had a bazillion questions and is like some little toddler just waking up. While I think it's good I called it quits today. He says he's in contact with his sponsor and has been talking to hi...

Lyne · Lyne

So I've just spent my entire weekend being depressed about my A plus (plus other addictions), and now today I am so ANGRY. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I am usually a very NICE person and I don't think I can do it tonight. I'm not going to fight; I just feel like I don't want to smile or make &...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Good morning, I am writing this from my phone on the commute to work. I am really struggling right now with my routine. I am getting very impatient with the progress of certain things and am having a hard time judt letting it go. There are certain things I want out of my life and continually doing the same s...

katfshh · katfshh

Hi everyone, Life has had so many changes since my exAF moved away July 16th. I was doing so well. But, last week during the big Hurricane on the East Coast, I started to worry about my exAF. He lives on the Jersey Shore now. We have had only a few texts the entire time he has been gone, no phone or email conv...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

I'm able to detach enough from this that I can make pretty good decisions. I am not alone in my experience with the family courts in CA. I'm broke after more than 10k in lawyers who were able to do nothing. Precisely because the mediation services CA requires you to go through will not allow lawyers an...

Maxine12stepper · Maxine12stepper

Hello all my MIP family, Im really needing some advice, I have been with my A for nearly 5 years now, we parted for 7 months when he became a dry drunk and I (didnt realize at the time, I was a sick as a dog too) but we are back together and both working our own program's and getting on better than we ever have, n...

Jozie · Jozie

You Know I am So Grateful For Al-Anon/ACOA its not even Funny! I know I Say this alot, but its True non the Less... This Morning I get one of those LOVELY Calls from my ASis, who is in Complete & Total "Whirling" Mode, Trying to Control Others, (Except Herself) Trying to Force Solutions th...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just real quick: I have been having pretty good days! I guess I am finally turning things over! I can tell when I don't have a lot of anxiety. I am glad that I don't believe me! Kathleen

tortuga · tortuga

Hello MiP family, I just came back from a solo trip to the mountains....literally just 'walking the path of detachment'. Initially the plan was that I do that 2 weeks trip with friends, but HP decided otherwise and let me go alone. I felt a bit strange at first, because I was scared to spend so much time wi...

pineapple · pineapple

It's been a little over two months since my A left. I was on this site every day before then. I am quite serious when I say that MIP helped to restore my sanity. I've dropped in a few times in the last two months. Right now I'm spending all of my energy on taking care of me. I know how important this place and all...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

I have one of those lives that's difficult to work around. But I just kept working on it, took me nearly a year but got there. I went on my lunch break (I do a lot on my lunch breaks due to my schedule) and it was great to go. The only drawback is it appears to be a 1.5 hour meeting and I can only be there for 1 hou...

Sam813 · Sam813

Hi everyone, My A brother has called me like 7 times tonight. I was out to dinner with my best friend, trying to take care of myself. My mother called and said he is trying to get into rehab while asking for a ride or a place to stay before hand. I haven't answered or called back as I'm trying to go about my lif...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'd like to ask you to keep my mom and family in your thoughts and prayers. I got a call from my brother that my mother appears to have had a stroke this morning. He's with her and they are waiting for an ambulance while in the area of the storm. He's prepared to make necessary decisions. He assured me it h...

uscgmomma1028 · uscgmomma1028

broken....i am a child of an alcohlic was married to alcohlic and have been involved with alcohlic for the past 6 years. i love my boyfriend but we were living disfunctional. and last weekend it errupted into an explosive argrument and my shoulder was broken. i have to say that evening i was drinking a...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Losing my job last week really knocked me sideways. I always knew it was a temporary gig, but I was still shocked at the timing of everything, and the way it was handled. It left me with a huge laundry list of worries and challenges. I am working hard to keep everything separate, and avoid feeling tota...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

So my 14 year old is interested in boys and wants to be able to date. She is a freshmen and our rule even after the divorce has been at 16 she can start dating in groups. So I find out she kind of has a boyfriend and they are hand holding. What do I do or say? Her dad is ready to cave and try to set boundaries for her d...

Roothy · Roothy

He's supposedly in recovery, but he drinks. I know it's not my problem. BUT THIS IS KILLING ME. I came home unexpectedly from work an hour ago, he wasn't here. I figured he was out drinking, and resisted the urge to text him. To help me, I looked up this forum. He just showed up, said, "I'm actu...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

So, off I go w/ thinking positively. I am not going to let circumstance & other things control or ruin my day! I am so proud of my husband for admitting he was wrong yesterday--no need for details. Now I have to follow this w/ trying to be more apologetic towards him on most occasions. He deserves to be...

UK Jane · UK Jane

Hi everyone, I'm looking for some ES&H. I've been thinking about trust lately, specifically in relation to my HP. That lead me on to thinking about faith. I'm praying at the moment for a deepening of my trust & faith in my HP and I always pray to remain willing. Do any of you have anything to s...

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

Just letting you all know that I am still lurking around out here. I don't post often, but I read a lot of your posts for ESH and lessons that I can use in my life. Things are still going very well for me. I still attend and will probably, ALWAYS attend Alanon in my town. My local group is part of my family now a...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey everyone, Last night me and a co-worker/friend went to go see the the new Denzel Washington movie, Flight. I bring this up because the movie tackles alcoholism and how it can rip someone's life apart. The alcoholic in the movie gets caught up in their lies and for me, it was some pretty heavy duty stu...

Pushka · Pushka

Well, STBAX's mom is home and I was able to take my eldest to go and visit with her. The visit was ok. Youngest is at his other grandma's (STBAX's ex s/mom). In fact the kids were there almost all weekend and had a great time with their cousin who is 5 visiting from out of town. I figured he saw her Thursda...

Sam813 · Sam813

I pray until I fall asleep, when I sleep...It's a good day. I have given this situation to my higher power and have faith in his healing. Today has been hard. I haven't seen my only sibling, my baby brother, in 3 months; when I hear from him, he makes no sense. He is a homeless addict. He has become manip...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

My AW has seen me depressed this morning. Her alcohol problem is not as extreme as some others. People have asked me what I feel the problem is and other than some of the drinking indicators itself nothing in her other behaivor really bothers me. One of her symptoms is her drinking first thing in the m...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I was shopping Home Depot the other day and bumped into my cousin who has been missing for a year and a half. She was working for Home Depot when she disappeared and then she was gone. She is a mysteriously discovered relative from my natural family on the natural father's side. This is one of the al...

shadow78 · shadow78

I am here because reading these posts help me see that I am not alone. I really don't even know where to start. I will start with where I am at today. I am lost. I have made so many decisions based on fear, fear of making my situation worse, fear of what the A might do if I cut off contact, fear of what he wil...

stephaniej · stephaniej

It's dark times over here. Bring on your inspirational quotes! I would LOVE a feel-better thread that I can access and easily see some of your uplifting sayings in one place!

gyzer02 · gyzer02

The adventure continues with a new low. My AW just received a reply from our son that he will not allow his mother to baby sit his children. This brought about a binge and a new attempt to get sober. I read in a post on this site describing the attempt as a white knuckle event. Without any support group o...

jorjorjor · jorjorjor

Hey all, I'm trying to take it one day at a time and trust that my higher power is looking out for me, but I'm finding myself stressing hard over money! I'm working right now and making just enough to pay my rent, my food stamps haven't come in yet and its been difficult to get in touch with my food stamps work...

WornOutMrsFixIt · WornOutMrsFixIt

Have been in to read and will start to post but so many changes going on and scattered feelings I don't even know how to start. So, I'll just start typing. I have traded in my car so no more car payment which has been a huge load off of my shoulders. I have removed my name from the utility accounts and told ...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Manipulation (Preview) Why are alcoholics manipulative? Why do they berate, insult and try to make others feel guilty? What is the best course of action when they do this? Thank You.	Summerseeker	6	486	Nov 11, 2012 by Lyne
	Advice for a newbie (Preview) Hi out there! I have never before dealt with anyone seriously affected by alcoholism. I will say, I have enocuntered certain struggles with some close family members and friends that may over-indulge from time to time, however never someone who is an active AA member and currently dealing with his...	SecondChance	13	546	Nov 11, 2012 by alcfriend
	Funny business with the money (Preview) For the first time in many many years, I have 2 overdraft charges on our checking account. Now, I know I have been lax about taking care of stuff but when I checked the account I realized that AH had been taking out extra cash on debits wherever he went. He basically took out around 400-500 in the past 10 d...	ilovedogs	12	759	Nov 11, 2012 by ilovedogs
	Nothing has changed but everything has changed. (Preview) I shared that I was in a relationship that has been going over ten years. We have never met face to face. Just everyway else to communicate. Best friends, confidants, all very moral and great. It started feeling different. Growing like I suppose we all wish would happen in our lives. But still is fine ju...	Debilyn	8	643	Nov 11, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Closer to bottom (Preview) Hi Everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. Today, I received a call from my father. He hadn't been to work in the last little while and today he said he went to go see his doctor. His doctor put him on anti-depressant medication because he is depressed. he called to tell me tha...	slogan_jim	3	351	Nov 11, 2012 by slogan_jim
	Slow Slow Journey (Preview) I have been trying to work on myself. After deciding it was time to divorce my AH , he decided it was time to convince me he could change. He really had me going there for a while, I was allowing myself to believe him. We were having good talks, had a nice 'date' out and then it came up in a conversation that I di...	TrudyS85	3	310	Nov 10, 2012 by Mattie
	still in a funk (Preview) Ya know, my spouse is promising again to change. I think everytime she makes these promises she actually plans to do it. But in a week or two, she is right back to the old tricks. I told her she's not changing because she doesn't want to. It's me that wants things different. I no longer believe she wil...	Lyne	3	311	Nov 10, 2012 by Tasha
	well... (Preview) Well...as you can see I am on here again after yesterday. Good news can travel fast. I am so glad that I don't have to worry about my health. God is in control. Just yesterday someone famous mentioned that she had thyroid cancer & one of my FB friends just had an operation to remove her thyroid for the s...	Hoot Nanny	2	362	Nov 10, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Newbie here but Old Timer (Preview) I have been reading here as often as work allows and decided it was time to introduce myself. I am a survivor of addiction. Both parents were alcoholics and my mother died from cirrhosis. Both of my brothers are drug addicts, also. I have been married for 26 years to an alcoholic and drug addict that now...	sweetyhide	4	364	Nov 10, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Anxiety Seperation (Preview) After heading down to my first meeting yesterday, I felt a mixture of relief and confusion. I feel I belong there, but Most if not all were still with their partners that have stopped their addictions. I am not, at least not physically. I find that I am still trapped in both mentally and emotionally. E...	aprilla	3	381	Nov 10, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Drinking and Driving (Preview) I know this topic has come up many, many times here, but I'm hoping to re-visit it with your ESH, as I try to examine my own motives. My AH has three DUIs. Because now, he does most of his drinking at home after work (and he works until 11 p.m.), he is not in the environment he used to be in before we were toget...	stephaniej	9	588	Nov 10, 2012 by Pushka
	Finally going to a meeting!!! yay!! (Preview) Hello my MIP family, I am so happy to tell you guys im going to my first F2F meeting on sunday!! and boy do I need it, I had an awful day yesterday and decided to call up the al anon head office in london to find any 'day' meetings in my area, there are two evening meetings near me that I just cant get to as I have t...	Maxine12stepper	3	352	Nov 9, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Very Concerned about Elderly, Alcoholic Mother - Newbie to forum (Preview) Hi everyone. I am new to this forum. My mother is 64, her parents were both alcoholics and she began drinking about 20 years ago when I was in high school. For the most part she is what I would call a relatively high functioning A- she went to work every day, was dependable for any social events, did...	kkhinaustin	3	3978	Nov 9, 2012 by pinkchip
	What about moving on and new relationships???? (Preview) I have a question. I know I feel the need to control things. I know that I get overwhelmed at times and feel stuck. So when it comes to a relationship, what does "let go, let God" mean exactly? I am attracted to A's. Always. My friend said we should go to a local sports pub the other day to try to mee...	katfshh	14	767	Nov 9, 2012 by Chaya
	How do you deal with the void of the past when you grew up in this family disease? (Preview) dear all, if you like, please share with me how you deal with those emotioanl gaps in your life created by alcoholic behaviour. As we know it is not only the liquid itself, but the psychological behaviour connected to that disease. Looking back, my sight got clearer, I understand, I comprehend, I get n...	tortuga	5	505	Nov 9, 2012 by tortuga
	So many feelings (Preview) It's just grief - all these changing feelings from one hour to the next due to my mother dying. It's becoming more real. I wonder how it will be, the funeral, people at the wake. I'm not sure we'll even have anyone due to the storm and people being the age they are. It could just be us. My sis in law will be as s...	tiredtonite	8	444	Nov 9, 2012 by stephaniej
	I am a resentful b_ _ _ch(fill in the blank) (Preview) I have self labeled myself this way today: resentful b*tch. At least, I am this in my own head. I have been working my program, working with my sponsor, forgiving as best as my heart knows how to, but something feels missing. I, at multiple times of the day, pray for my AH and tell my HP that I am giving AH...	ilovedogs	16	1893	Nov 9, 2012 by Debilyn
	briefly... please read! (Preview) This morning I found out that my ultrasound is normal & that it seems that I don't have ovarian cancer. My arthritis doctor thought that was a possibility. Pardon me, but I sometimes think he is a quack! I want to stop seeing him so bad but he prescribes the medicine that lessens my pain. I feel like I a...	Hoot Nanny	3	769	Nov 9, 2012 by Debilyn
	Family involvement (Preview) Well I must say that this week has been a pretty good one for me and the AW. Tuesday night she went to bed early and I stayed up some and watched some TV. My 23 year old daughter called to check on our grandson, who was also sleeping. I had discussed the alcohol use with her mother a while back. Sadly I shou...	hdftby100	3	237	Nov 9, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Once again, reaching for sanity (Preview) Hi everyone, I so appreciate your posts..they help me get in touch with my feelings and experience compassion for all of you and me. Often the last person I feel compassion for is me. I am hurting this morning and I look forward to attending an al anon group and a session with my therapist today. I am e...	PP	8	571	Nov 9, 2012 by Tasha
	He's sending me flowers (Preview) I guess he feels that flowers solve all marriage problems, LOL! I'll gratefully take the flowers but we've got a long way to go and it's not going to get me to Costa Rica either. There are so many things that need to happen and flowers just don't cut the mustard. He kept asking me if I could receive mail h...	ilovedogs	8	582	Nov 9, 2012 by Tasha
	Same Old Story (Preview) My husband summoned me downstairs to watch the President's acceptance speech, when he heard me get up to go to the bathroom. Of course, he had been drinking (like every night). Of course I have no idea how much he had been drinking, but of course he was displaying all his classic signs of being drunk. ...	stephaniej	12	627	Nov 8, 2012 by ilovedogs
	Please prayers for our TT (Preview) TT's Mother passed. Our friend needs our prayers and love. She is a strong little lady, is in that grieving fog now. I know you all will send the all the love you can to her, mip sisters and brothers always do. thankyou, Debilyn	Debilyn	18	452	Nov 8, 2012 by PP
	And the sun comes out... (Preview) Aloha MIP Ohana (family) and good morning. It started out overcast, dark and wet from last nights rain. I wasn't in a very healthy mood until I clicked on here. Another sleepless night with the physical, emotional and mental pain from the police assault, one year to the date tomorrow increasing...	Jerry F	13	468	Nov 8, 2012 by Peggy7
	how to help young daughter (Preview) Hi- I'm new to this. I'm looking for some assistance on how to help my 9 year old daughter. Her father has been in recovery for approx 2 years (although I believe he is using marjiuana). He is verbally and emotionally abusive to me. He frequently over-reacts which results in our daughter suffering. We h...	Niki	4	520	Nov 8, 2012 by Jerry F
	Need to let out the frustration!!!! (Preview) Hi everyone, It's been a while since I've posted here (over a year I think) - I'm much more active on various chatrooms, but I really need a space to be brutally honest about what's going on right now, as I haven't felt able to tell ANYONE what's going on with us since my A and I got engaged last week. Bac...	Loubelou	3	458	Nov 8, 2012 by Mattie
	She cheated :/ what to do ??? (Preview) Mygf is a very bad alchalic she is in rehab now bc when we broke up se drank to a bal .45 and was taken to the hospital but I have been supporting Her thru this all when she wants help and set things in place like not being around when she drinks and sutch she had recintly told me about cheeting on me but i do know s...	Tony48183	6	660	Nov 8, 2012 by Jerry F
	How big are your meetings/groups? (Preview) Hey everyone, I recently became GR of my group and over the last few months (even prior to me being GR), our membership has gone down. We used to get approximately between 6-8 members regularly. Now, it is the same 3 people that come. 2 weeks ago, one member made a point of making a comment that the reason t...	slogan_jim	5	468	Nov 8, 2012 by DavidG
	Much needs advise please (Preview) Hello I'm new to the forum I'd really appreciate some help, advice, feedback on my situation. I don't have anywhere else to turn. I have been with my Boyfriend for over 5 years, he was 22 when we met and drank a lot (a bottle of vodka most nights) but i put this down to being young, drinking with friends,...	Bird Seed	5	434	Nov 8, 2012 by Tasha
	Still confused after a year (Preview) So my A has been sober for over a year and i am still myserable. I dont know why. He is happy and okay and i am back to the begging of despair again. I still dont know how to let go of all the bad things he did in the past i never got a appology or acknowladgement of what he did or didnt do. I am struggling to allow him...	HAguirre	6	496	Nov 8, 2012 by maryjane
	The depths of denial (Preview) There's been some odd awakening, well not odd but interesting awakening in my A friend since we saw Flight. He has had a bazillion questions and is like some little toddler just waking up. While I think it's good I called it quits today. He says he's in contact with his sponsor and has been talking to hi...	AStrongerMe	1	300	Nov 8, 2012 by Jerry F
	Let go, let God~not working (Preview) So I've just spent my entire weekend being depressed about my A plus (plus other addictions), and now today I am so ANGRY. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I am usually a very NICE person and I don't think I can do it tonight. I'm not going to fight; I just feel like I don't want to smile or make &...	Lyne	5	467	Nov 7, 2012 by Lyne
	I'm struggling with patience/let go and let god (Preview) Good morning, I am writing this from my phone on the commute to work. I am really struggling right now with my routine. I am getting very impatient with the progress of certain things and am having a hard time judt letting it go. There are certain things I want out of my life and continually doing the same s...	slogan_jim	4	417	Nov 7, 2012 by pinkchip
	Missed you and need you, and moments of weakness :( (Preview) Hi everyone, Life has had so many changes since my exAF moved away July 16th. I was doing so well. But, last week during the big Hurricane on the East Coast, I started to worry about my exAF. He lives on the Jersey Shore now. We have had only a few texts the entire time he has been gone, no phone or email conv...	katfshh	9	456	Nov 7, 2012 by pinkchip
	My reality (Preview) I'm able to detach enough from this that I can make pretty good decisions. I am not alone in my experience with the family courts in CA. I'm broke after more than 10k in lawyers who were able to do nothing. Precisely because the mediation services CA requires you to go through will not allow lawyers an...	AStrongerMe	3	433	Nov 7, 2012 by katfshh
	cant shake this resentment :( (Preview) Hello all my MIP family, Im really needing some advice, I have been with my A for nearly 5 years now, we parted for 7 months when he became a dry drunk and I (didnt realize at the time, I was a sick as a dog too) but we are back together and both working our own program's and getting on better than we ever have, n...	Maxine12stepper	8	486	Nov 7, 2012 by Maxine12stepper
	The Whirling of My Family Disease... (Preview) You Know I am So Grateful For Al-Anon/ACOA its not even Funny! I know I Say this alot, but its True non the Less... This Morning I get one of those LOVELY Calls from my ASis, who is in Complete & Total "Whirling" Mode, Trying to Control Others, (Except Herself) Trying to Force Solutions th...	Jozie	2	440	Nov 7, 2012 by hotrod
	2 good days in a row--so far! (Preview) Just real quick: I have been having pretty good days! I guess I am finally turning things over! I can tell when I don't have a lot of anxiety. I am glad that I don't believe me! Kathleen	Hoot Nanny	2	256	Nov 7, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	weather forecast: LESS FOGGY!----an update! (Preview) Hello MiP family, I just came back from a solo trip to the mountains....literally just 'walking the path of detachment'. Initially the plan was that I do that 2 weeks trip with friends, but HP decided otherwise and let me go alone. I felt a bit strange at first, because I was scared to spend so much time wi...	tortuga	3	436	Nov 7, 2012 by hotrod
	Taking a break (Preview) It's been a little over two months since my A left. I was on this site every day before then. I am quite serious when I say that MIP helped to restore my sanity. I've dropped in a few times in the last two months. Right now I'm spending all of my energy on taking care of me. I know how important this place and all...	pineapple	8	391	Nov 7, 2012 by hotrod
	Finally got to a F2F meeting (Preview) I have one of those lives that's difficult to work around. But I just kept working on it, took me nearly a year but got there. I went on my lunch break (I do a lot on my lunch breaks due to my schedule) and it was great to go. The only drawback is it appears to be a 1.5 hour meeting and I can only be there for 1 hou...	AStrongerMe	4	354	Nov 7, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	What to do (Preview) Hi everyone, My A brother has called me like 7 times tonight. I was out to dinner with my best friend, trying to take care of myself. My mother called and said he is trying to get into rehab while asking for a ride or a place to stay before hand. I haven't answered or called back as I'm trying to go about my lif...	Sam813	4	296	Nov 6, 2012 by Mattie
	Prayers needed (Preview) I'd like to ask you to keep my mom and family in your thoughts and prayers. I got a call from my brother that my mother appears to have had a stroke this morning. He's with her and they are waiting for an ambulance while in the area of the storm. He's prepared to make necessary decisions. He assured me it h...	tiredtonite	19	437	Nov 6, 2012 by tiredtonite
	broken (Preview) broken....i am a child of an alcohlic was married to alcohlic and have been involved with alcohlic for the past 6 years. i love my boyfriend but we were living disfunctional. and last weekend it errupted into an explosive argrument and my shoulder was broken. i have to say that evening i was drinking a...	uscgmomma1028	5	436	Nov 6, 2012 by uscgmomma1028
	Baby steps in the right direction (Preview) Losing my job last week really knocked me sideways. I always knew it was a temporary gig, but I was still shocked at the timing of everything, and the way it was handled. It left me with a huge laundry list of worries and challenges. I am working hard to keep everything separate, and avoid feeling tota...	stephaniej	5	362	Nov 6, 2012 by Maxine12stepper
	fear and control taking over within me (Preview) So my 14 year old is interested in boys and wants to be able to date. She is a freshmen and our rule even after the divorce has been at 16 she can start dating in groups. So I find out she kind of has a boyfriend and they are hand holding. What do I do or say? Her dad is ready to cave and try to set boundaries for her d...	Breakingfree	5	504	Nov 6, 2012 by Debilyn
	boyfriend just went to the VFW... ugh (Preview) He's supposedly in recovery, but he drinks. I know it's not my problem. BUT THIS IS KILLING ME. I came home unexpectedly from work an hour ago, he wasn't here. I figured he was out drinking, and resisted the urge to text him. To help me, I looked up this forum. He just showed up, said, "I'm actu...	Roothy	4	391	Nov 6, 2012 by pinkchip
	untitled (Preview) So, off I go w/ thinking positively. I am not going to let circumstance & other things control or ruin my day! I am so proud of my husband for admitting he was wrong yesterday--no need for details. Now I have to follow this w/ trying to be more apologetic towards him on most occasions. He deserves to be...	Hoot Nanny	1	286	Nov 6, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Trust & Faith, we all need it. (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm looking for some ES&H. I've been thinking about trust lately, specifically in relation to my HP. That lead me on to thinking about faith. I'm praying at the moment for a deepening of my trust & faith in my HP and I always pray to remain willing. Do any of you have anything to s...	UK Jane	6	523	Nov 6, 2012 by UK Jane
	Hi all! (Preview) Just letting you all know that I am still lurking around out here. I don't post often, but I read a lot of your posts for ESH and lessons that I can use in my life. Things are still going very well for me. I still attend and will probably, ALWAYS attend Alanon in my town. My local group is part of my family now a...	Sweet Stanley	1	254	Nov 6, 2012 by Zimmy
	Flight (Movie with Denzel) (no spoilers :) (Preview) Hey everyone, Last night me and a co-worker/friend went to go see the the new Denzel Washington movie, Flight. I bring this up because the movie tackles alcoholism and how it can rip someone's life apart. The alcoholic in the movie gets caught up in their lies and for me, it was some pretty heavy duty stu...	slogan_jim	7	486	Nov 6, 2012 by Hoot Nanny
	Update (Preview) Well, STBAX's mom is home and I was able to take my eldest to go and visit with her. The visit was ok. Youngest is at his other grandma's (STBAX's ex s/mom). In fact the kids were there almost all weekend and had a great time with their cousin who is 5 visiting from out of town. I figured he saw her Thursda...	Pushka	5	309	Nov 5, 2012 by amills4294
	I'm worn (Preview) I pray until I fall asleep, when I sleep...It's a good day. I have given this situation to my higher power and have faith in his healing. Today has been hard. I haven't seen my only sibling, my baby brother, in 3 months; when I hear from him, he makes no sense. He is a homeless addict. He has become manip...	Sam813	4	497	Nov 5, 2012 by Jozie
	Should I tell her? (Preview) My AW has seen me depressed this morning. Her alcohol problem is not as extreme as some others. People have asked me what I feel the problem is and other than some of the drinking indicators itself nothing in her other behaivor really bothers me. One of her symptoms is her drinking first thing in the m...	hdftby100	7	441	Nov 5, 2012 by Jozie
	A family disease...more evidence (Preview) I was shopping Home Depot the other day and bumped into my cousin who has been missing for a year and a half. She was working for Home Depot when she disappeared and then she was gone. She is a mysteriously discovered relative from my natural family on the natural father's side. This is one of the al...	Jerry F	3	390	Nov 5, 2012 by Jozie
	I fear i have only made the situation worse (Preview) I am here because reading these posts help me see that I am not alone. I really don't even know where to start. I will start with where I am at today. I am lost. I have made so many decisions based on fear, fear of making my situation worse, fear of what the A might do if I cut off contact, fear of what he wil...	shadow78	8	571	Nov 5, 2012 by Sam813
	Bring on the Inspirational Quotes! (Preview) It's dark times over here. Bring on your inspirational quotes! I would LOVE a feel-better thread that I can access and easily see some of your uplifting sayings in one place!	stephaniej	12	551	Nov 5, 2012 by Sam813
	A New Low (Preview) The adventure continues with a new low. My AW just received a reply from our son that he will not allow his mother to baby sit his children. This brought about a binge and a new attempt to get sober. I read in a post on this site describing the attempt as a white knuckle event. Without any support group o...	gyzer02	5	403	Nov 5, 2012 by Jerry F
	trying to trust (Preview) Hey all, I'm trying to take it one day at a time and trust that my higher power is looking out for me, but I'm finding myself stressing hard over money! I'm working right now and making just enough to pay my rent, my food stamps haven't come in yet and its been difficult to get in touch with my food stamps work...	jorjorjor	2	414	Nov 5, 2012 by Jerry F
	Quick Update (Preview) Have been in to read and will start to post but so many changes going on and scattered feelings I don't even know how to start. So, I'll just start typing. I have traded in my car so no more car payment which has been a huge load off of my shoulders. I have removed my name from the utility accounts and told ...	WornOutMrsFixIt	4	314	Nov 5, 2012 by Breakingfree
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