Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Loupiness · Loupiness

My Friends, With the exception of a few "drive bys", I have been away from this board for about a year and a half. In addition to feeling a bit overwhelmed with work, parenting, and wicked insomnia, I decided I was at a point where I was stuck, and needed to shift my energy from words to action. T...

Pushka · Pushka

My STBAX has decided to threaten me since I asked him (well I probably told him .. LOL!!) that I needed him to take the kids to school tomorrow. My van is having issues, between the transmission and the heat being out we are getting the first frost tomorrow. He was FURIOUS. I got the most horrid text th...

Maxine12stepper · Maxine12stepper

Hi ya'll, I hope you are all well and happy today, I just wanted to let you know I finally got to my first face to face meeting and I absolutely loved it, I cant express how nervous I was on my way there, but with help from my HP I got there in one piece, lol, I met some lovely people and while the al anon meeting w...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

Feels like a long time since I been here. I been busy. But I still keep in contact with some of the people here so its not like I'm isolating. Got a funny story for ya. About 25 years ago, this guy I know (in AA) was working in a recovery home for alcoholics, and like most A's he had an idea a minute about how thin...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Family...just checking in before going to bed after a day of being still and quiet which worked wonders at taking the pain out of my back. I zoomed into Stephaniej's thread and read and decided to continue it with my own ESH. I'm a caller and a do unto others as I would want them to do for me. My exp...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

Sometimes life is great, sometimes it's rough. I'm in a rough patch and know it won't be forever. My mom has surgery for breast cancer on Thursday and I can't be there, I will be in So Cal visiting my son who is living with his aunt down there, the trip was planned and paid for before she was even diagnosed...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

http://youtu.be/d_sK086rHsI This is my 14 year old singing her second song she was brave enough to post on youtube and I am so proud of the young woman she is. Please give it a listen if you have time. She has grown from a very timid quiet person to coming out of her shell enough to do this, huge step for her...

Rosie08 · Rosie08

I am in the middle of a terrible place mentally and I do plan on starting a live Al Anon group this week, I just have to locate one I can get to since I work 40 hrs a week and am caregiver for my elderly mother. Anyway, when my husband was actively drinking he was verbally and physically abusive . . I had him arre...

avid · avid

Last year my daughter had a healthy baby boy. Wonderful. Except that shortly before she gave birth her husband who is always drinking, got himself fired from a good job for repeatedly sneaking home early. She went back to work after 3 months and the "plan" was that he would stay home wit...

WornOutMrsFixIt · WornOutMrsFixIt

I finally lost it. I have been doing so well at beng detached and working on me but today was the end of that streak. I blew up at the AH because my mom and dad have gotten on my last nerve today and the reality that I am 46 years old and living in 1 room in their house and have nowhere else to go at the moment while t...

Lyne · Lyne

I know why I am stuck in depression, however it is not as bad as last weekend. It is because I have had one of my Ah ha moments again, for the 500th time, that my A is not interested in changing. I think I am grieving the loss of the marriage I thought I had, wanted to have, could still have, but I am not going to ha...

smiles54 · smiles54

I am new to this board but just find that I need someone to listen to my rambling and maybe relate. I am so tired of being tired. I am married to an alcoholic and I am just burnt out. Burnt out because I work 40 hours a week and he works 8. Burnt out because he can sleep till 2 in the afternoon and I wake up early an...

Yogini · Yogini

I can't even say for sure if it is alcoholism I am dealing with in this situation. Irresponsibility with alcohol I suppose. My questioning is how to deal maturely with the situation and how to view it. On a few occasions my husband has come home from work, temporarily working at a liquor store even thoug...

2havehope · 2havehope

i am new here and i would like to ask a question...... can i still attend alanon meetings and do the 12 steps if the alcoholic is bipolar. my son is 35yrs old and bipolor (alcohol and drug induced at 29)..... i am an older (59) mother and he is the reason why i'm seeking help..... i just can't seemed to ju...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Good morning MIP Ohana...Family... I'm staying still and and full today...I will let my body heal as is desires and is attempting to do. The pain in my spine screams for attention and the only attention it will get is stillness and quiet. I was going to go to a meeting this morning...my home group, f...

DavidG · DavidG

This is a place I can call home. This place is called Alanon World, or even 12 Step World. This is a place where I am not alone. This is a place I share with a host of other people, including you. This is a unique experience, being able to attend a forum from my own dining room table. No petrol in the car and no ba...

SpookyMulder · SpookyMulder

My wife recently started going to AA after several years of our struggling with her poor impulse control. Obviously, this takes the form of drinking often enough to be a problem. The situation, though, is complicated by the fact that when she was a baby she had bacterial meningitis that went untrea...

learning · learning

Hi Everyone, I am not new to MIP. I started my journey years ago. In the beginning I tried ALNON, yet I ended up on the AA side/message board. At the time, in my search for help, after hearing and reading ALNON stories or pleadings for 'help' I was dismayed. All I could think was 'bitch, bitch, b...

Tasha · Tasha

I looked at my husband after watching the movie flight last night - and I said "The powerlessness? If you would have told me I was losing my kids and my family while I was drinking, I would not have been able to stop even if I wanted to. With out help, I would have so badly not wanted to drink again, but...

shamrockgrl74 · shamrockgrl74

Hi..I'm new to board and have never done this before.... My DH is a recovering drug addict. He cleaned up in his 20's...he had been clean & sober for about 10 years when I meet him. Fast forward.... 5 years ago he started taking pain killers for a neck issue... I was nieve and didn't think much of it...

crazycatlady · crazycatlady

hello to all-- After 2 1/2 years of sobriety and really working an AA program (up until 2 months ago) my AH drank Friday night. We all saw it coming and even he said he knew he was in a downward spiral and ready to drink again. I went back to work 3 months ago and this new schedule has prompted him to need to t...

Chaya · Chaya

Well, I had posted on here last week that my sponsor got really upset with me after she referred me to attend some AA meetings to explore some of my own drinking patterns. I haven't heard back from her since that conversation in which she told me she was busy and didn't know what to do with me. I haven't reac...

AllieinAlanon · AllieinAlanon

Hello again. Together, with my sponsor, I have decided to ask a question about Alanon meetings or Alanon in general. As I may have shared, Alanon is my last loose end I have had to tie in my recovery/addiction process in my life. When I feel afraid to share, though, my process is interrupted. This has not...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Last night at our open AA meeting I apologized for my behavior 2 weeks ago to all that were sitting there in regards to my AH. I didn't feel that he got it even though I made it clear as mud. I felt that I was out of line outing him on some of the things he has done--not my place. I felt it necessary to share it w/ th...

Summerseeker · Summerseeker

Why are alcoholics manipulative? Why do they berate, insult and try to make others feel guilty? What is the best course of action when they do this? Thank You.

SecondChance · SecondChance

Hi out there! I have never before dealt with anyone seriously affected by alcoholism. I will say, I have enocuntered certain struggles with some close family members and friends that may over-indulge from time to time, however never someone who is an active AA member and currently dealing with his...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

For the first time in many many years, I have 2 overdraft charges on our checking account. Now, I know I have been lax about taking care of stuff but when I checked the account I realized that AH had been taking out extra cash on debits wherever he went. He basically took out around 400-500 in the past 10 d...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I shared that I was in a relationship that has been going over ten years. We have never met face to face. Just everyway else to communicate. Best friends, confidants, all very moral and great. It started feeling different. Growing like I suppose we all wish would happen in our lives. But still is fine ju...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. Today, I received a call from my father. He hadn't been to work in the last little while and today he said he went to go see his doctor. His doctor put him on anti-depressant medication because he is depressed. he called to tell me tha...

TrudyS85 · TrudyS85

I have been trying to work on myself. After deciding it was time to divorce my AH , he decided it was time to convince me he could change. He really had me going there for a while, I was allowing myself to believe him. We were having good talks, had a nice 'date' out and then it came up in a conversation that I di...

Lyne · Lyne

Ya know, my spouse is promising again to change. I think everytime she makes these promises she actually plans to do it. But in a week or two, she is right back to the old tricks. I told her she's not changing because she doesn't want to. It's me that wants things different. I no longer believe she wil...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Well...as you can see I am on here again after yesterday. Good news can travel fast. I am so glad that I don't have to worry about my health. God is in control. Just yesterday someone famous mentioned that she had thyroid cancer & one of my FB friends just had an operation to remove her thyroid for the s...

sweetyhide · sweetyhide

I have been reading here as often as work allows and decided it was time to introduce myself. I am a survivor of addiction. Both parents were alcoholics and my mother died from cirrhosis. Both of my brothers are drug addicts, also. I have been married for 26 years to an alcoholic and drug addict that now...

aprilla · aprilla

After heading down to my first meeting yesterday, I felt a mixture of relief and confusion. I feel I belong there, but Most if not all were still with their partners that have stopped their addictions. I am not, at least not physically. I find that I am still trapped in both mentally and emotionally. E...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I know this topic has come up many, many times here, but I'm hoping to re-visit it with your ESH, as I try to examine my own motives. My AH has three DUIs. Because now, he does most of his drinking at home after work (and he works until 11 p.m.), he is not in the environment he used to be in before we were toget...

Maxine12stepper · Maxine12stepper

Hello my MIP family, I am so happy to tell you guys im going to my first F2F meeting on sunday!! and boy do I need it, I had an awful day yesterday and decided to call up the al anon head office in london to find any 'day' meetings in my area, there are two evening meetings near me that I just cant get to as I have t...

kkhinaustin · kkhinaustin

Hi everyone. I am new to this forum. My mother is 64, her parents were both alcoholics and she began drinking about 20 years ago when I was in high school. For the most part she is what I would call a relatively high functioning A- she went to work every day, was dependable for any social events, did...

katfshh · katfshh

I have a question. I know I feel the need to control things. I know that I get overwhelmed at times and feel stuck. So when it comes to a relationship, what does "let go, let God" mean exactly? I am attracted to A's. Always. My friend said we should go to a local sports pub the other day to try to mee...

tortuga · tortuga

dear all, if you like, please share with me how you deal with those emotioanl gaps in your life created by alcoholic behaviour. As we know it is not only the liquid itself, but the psychological behaviour connected to that disease. Looking back, my sight got clearer, I understand, I comprehend, I get n...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

It's just grief - all these changing feelings from one hour to the next due to my mother dying. It's becoming more real. I wonder how it will be, the funeral, people at the wake. I'm not sure we'll even have anyone due to the storm and people being the age they are. It could just be us. My sis in law will be as s...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I have self labeled myself this way today: resentful b*tch. At least, I am this in my own head. I have been working my program, working with my sponsor, forgiving as best as my heart knows how to, but something feels missing. I, at multiple times of the day, pray for my AH and tell my HP that I am giving AH...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

This morning I found out that my ultrasound is normal & that it seems that I don't have ovarian cancer. My arthritis doctor thought that was a possibility. Pardon me, but I sometimes think he is a quack! I want to stop seeing him so bad but he prescribes the medicine that lessens my pain. I feel like I a...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

Well I must say that this week has been a pretty good one for me and the AW. Tuesday night she went to bed early and I stayed up some and watched some TV. My 23 year old daughter called to check on our grandson, who was also sleeping. I had discussed the alcohol use with her mother a while back. Sadly I shou...

PP · PP

Hi everyone, I so appreciate your posts..they help me get in touch with my feelings and experience compassion for all of you and me. Often the last person I feel compassion for is me. I am hurting this morning and I look forward to attending an al anon group and a session with my therapist today. I am e...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I guess he feels that flowers solve all marriage problems, LOL! I'll gratefully take the flowers but we've got a long way to go and it's not going to get me to Costa Rica either. There are so many things that need to happen and flowers just don't cut the mustard. He kept asking me if I could receive mail h...

stephaniej · stephaniej

My husband summoned me downstairs to watch the President's acceptance speech, when he heard me get up to go to the bathroom. Of course, he had been drinking (like every night). Of course I have no idea how much he had been drinking, but of course he was displaying all his classic signs of being drunk. ...

Debilyn · Debilyn

TT's Mother passed. Our friend needs our prayers and love. She is a strong little lady, is in that grieving fog now. I know you all will send the all the love you can to her, mip sisters and brothers always do. thankyou, Debilyn

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha MIP Ohana (family) and good morning. It started out overcast, dark and wet from last nights rain. I wasn't in a very healthy mood until I clicked on here. Another sleepless night with the physical, emotional and mental pain from the police assault, one year to the date tomorrow increasing...

Niki · Niki

Hi- I'm new to this. I'm looking for some assistance on how to help my 9 year old daughter. Her father has been in recovery for approx 2 years (although I believe he is using marjiuana). He is verbally and emotionally abusive to me. He frequently over-reacts which results in our daughter suffering. We h...

Loubelou · Loubelou

Hi everyone, It's been a while since I've posted here (over a year I think) - I'm much more active on various chatrooms, but I really need a space to be brutally honest about what's going on right now, as I haven't felt able to tell ANYONE what's going on with us since my A and I got engaged last week. Bac...

Tony48183 · Tony48183

Mygf is a very bad alchalic she is in rehab now bc when we broke up se drank to a bal .45 and was taken to the hospital but I have been supporting Her thru this all when she wants help and set things in place like not being around when she drinks and sutch she had recintly told me about cheeting on me but i do know s...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey everyone, I recently became GR of my group and over the last few months (even prior to me being GR), our membership has gone down. We used to get approximately between 6-8 members regularly. Now, it is the same 3 people that come. 2 weeks ago, one member made a point of making a comment that the reason t...

Bird Seed · Bird Seed

Hello I'm new to the forum

I'd really appreciate some help, advice, feedback on my situation. I don't have anywhere else to turn. I have been with my Boyfriend for over 5 years, he was 22 when we met and drank a lot (a bottle of vodka most nights) but i put this down to being young, drinking with friends,...

HAguirre · HAguirre

So my A has been sober for over a year and i am still myserable. I dont know why. He is happy and okay and i am back to the begging of despair again. I still dont know how to let go of all the bad things he did in the past i never got a appology or acknowladgement of what he did or didnt do. I am struggling to allow him...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

There's been some odd awakening, well not odd but interesting awakening in my A friend since we saw Flight. He has had a bazillion questions and is like some little toddler just waking up. While I think it's good I called it quits today. He says he's in contact with his sponsor and has been talking to hi...

Lyne · Lyne

So I've just spent my entire weekend being depressed about my A plus (plus other addictions), and now today I am so ANGRY. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I am usually a very NICE person and I don't think I can do it tonight. I'm not going to fight; I just feel like I don't want to smile or make &...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Good morning, I am writing this from my phone on the commute to work. I am really struggling right now with my routine. I am getting very impatient with the progress of certain things and am having a hard time judt letting it go. There are certain things I want out of my life and continually doing the same s...

katfshh · katfshh

Hi everyone, Life has had so many changes since my exAF moved away July 16th. I was doing so well. But, last week during the big Hurricane on the East Coast, I started to worry about my exAF. He lives on the Jersey Shore now. We have had only a few texts the entire time he has been gone, no phone or email conv...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

I'm able to detach enough from this that I can make pretty good decisions. I am not alone in my experience with the family courts in CA. I'm broke after more than 10k in lawyers who were able to do nothing. Precisely because the mediation services CA requires you to go through will not allow lawyers an...

Maxine12stepper · Maxine12stepper

Hello all my MIP family, Im really needing some advice, I have been with my A for nearly 5 years now, we parted for 7 months when he became a dry drunk and I (didnt realize at the time, I was a sick as a dog too) but we are back together and both working our own program's and getting on better than we ever have, n...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Coming back (Preview) My Friends, With the exception of a few "drive bys", I have been away from this board for about a year and a half. In addition to feeling a bit overwhelmed with work, parenting, and wicked insomnia, I decided I was at a point where I was stuck, and needed to shift my energy from words to action. T...	Loupiness	3	427	Nov 14, 2012 by Jerry F
	Completely FLOORED!! (Preview) My STBAX has decided to threaten me since I asked him (well I probably told him .. LOL!!) that I needed him to take the kids to school tomorrow. My van is having issues, between the transmission and the heat being out we are getting the first frost tomorrow. He was FURIOUS. I got the most horrid text th...	Pushka	18	551	Nov 14, 2012 by hdftby100
	First meeting was great :) (Preview) Hi ya'll, I hope you are all well and happy today, I just wanted to let you know I finally got to my first face to face meeting and I absolutely loved it, I cant express how nervous I was on my way there, but with help from my HP I got there in one piece, lol, I met some lovely people and while the al anon meeting w...	Maxine12stepper	6	361	Nov 14, 2012 by hdftby100
	When You Get Your Own House (Preview) Feels like a long time since I been here. I been busy. But I still keep in contact with some of the people here so its not like I'm isolating. Got a funny story for ya. About 25 years ago, this guy I know (in AA) was working in a recovery home for alcoholics, and like most A's he had an idea a minute about how thin...	Wolfie55	5	514	Nov 14, 2012 by tiredtonite
	Drinking and Driving cont. (Preview) Aloha Family...just checking in before going to bed after a day of being still and quiet which worked wonders at taking the pain out of my back. I zoomed into Stephaniej's thread and read and decided to continue it with my own ESH. I'm a caller and a do unto others as I would want them to do for me. My exp...	Jerry F	6	475	Nov 14, 2012 by orchidlover
	It's quiet for a little while (Preview) Sometimes life is great, sometimes it's rough. I'm in a rough patch and know it won't be forever. My mom has surgery for breast cancer on Thursday and I can't be there, I will be in So Cal visiting my son who is living with his aunt down there, the trip was planned and paid for before she was even diagnosed...	AStrongerMe	4	401	Nov 14, 2012 by Wolfie55
	She did it again and WOW (Preview) http://youtu.be/d_sK086rHsI This is my 14 year old singing her second song she was brave enough to post on youtube and I am so proud of the young woman she is. Please give it a listen if you have time. She has grown from a very timid quiet person to coming out of her shell enough to do this, huge step for her...	Breakingfree	6	563	Nov 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	My dry drunk spouse (Preview) I am in the middle of a terrible place mentally and I do plan on starting a live Al Anon group this week, I just have to locate one I can get to since I work 40 hrs a week and am caregiver for my elderly mother. Anyway, when my husband was actively drinking he was verbally and physically abusive . . I had him arre...	Rosie08	12	1468	Nov 14, 2012 by Rosie08
	newcomer feeling very angry (Preview) Last year my daughter had a healthy baby boy. Wonderful. Except that shortly before she gave birth her husband who is always drinking, got himself fired from a good job for repeatedly sneaking home early. She went back to work after 3 months and the "plan" was that he would stay home wit...	avid	8	538	Nov 13, 2012 by avid
	Cherry on Top of a Craptacular Week (Preview) I finally lost it. I have been doing so well at beng detached and working on me but today was the end of that streak. I blew up at the AH because my mom and dad have gotten on my last nerve today and the reality that I am 46 years old and living in 1 room in their house and have nowhere else to go at the moment while t...	WornOutMrsFixIt	12	600	Nov 13, 2012 by Pushka
	Ah ha moments repeat (Preview) I know why I am stuck in depression, however it is not as bad as last weekend. It is because I have had one of my Ah ha moments again, for the 500th time, that my A is not interested in changing. I think I am grieving the loss of the marriage I thought I had, wanted to have, could still have, but I am not going to ha...	Lyne	4	358	Nov 13, 2012 by Lyne
	Just Frustrated (Preview) I am new to this board but just find that I need someone to listen to my rambling and maybe relate. I am so tired of being tired. I am married to an alcoholic and I am just burnt out. Burnt out because I work 40 hours a week and he works 8. Burnt out because he can sleep till 2 in the afternoon and I wake up early an...	smiles54	4	372	Nov 12, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Questioning (Preview) I can't even say for sure if it is alcoholism I am dealing with in this situation. Irresponsibility with alcohol I suppose. My questioning is how to deal maturely with the situation and how to view it. On a few occasions my husband has come home from work, temporarily working at a liquor store even thoug...	Yogini	3	356	Nov 12, 2012 by Breakingfree
	alcohol and bipolar (Preview) i am new here and i would like to ask a question...... can i still attend alanon meetings and do the 12 steps if the alcoholic is bipolar. my son is 35yrs old and bipolor (alcohol and drug induced at 29)..... i am an older (59) mother and he is the reason why i'm seeking help..... i just can't seemed to ju...	2havehope	6	2468	Nov 12, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Staying still...staying full (Preview) Good morning MIP Ohana...Family... I'm staying still and and full today...I will let my body heal as is desires and is attempting to do. The pain in my spine screams for attention and the only attention it will get is stillness and quiet. I was going to go to a meeting this morning...my home group, f...	Jerry F	5	383	Nov 12, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Gratitude... (Preview) This is a place I can call home. This place is called Alanon World, or even 12 Step World. This is a place where I am not alone. This is a place I share with a host of other people, including you. This is a unique experience, being able to attend a forum from my own dining room table. No petrol in the car and no ba...	DavidG	4	1140	Nov 12, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Alcoholism and Epilepsy (Preview) My wife recently started going to AA after several years of our struggling with her poor impulse control. Obviously, this takes the form of drinking often enough to be a problem. The situation, though, is complicated by the fact that when she was a baby she had bacterial meningitis that went untrea...	SpookyMulder	6	509	Nov 12, 2012 by SpookyMulder
	Extending a Hand (Preview) Hi Everyone, I am not new to MIP. I started my journey years ago. In the beginning I tried ALNON, yet I ended up on the AA side/message board. At the time, in my search for help, after hearing and reading ALNON stories or pleadings for 'help' I was dismayed. All I could think was 'bitch, bitch, b...	learning	4	500	Nov 12, 2012 by learning
	Was that really me? (Preview) I looked at my husband after watching the movie flight last night - and I said "The powerlessness? If you would have told me I was losing my kids and my family while I was drinking, I would not have been able to stop even if I wanted to. With out help, I would have so badly not wanted to drink again, but...	Tasha	2	318	Nov 12, 2012 by ilovedogs
	new to board... (Preview) Hi..I'm new to board and have never done this before.... My DH is a recovering drug addict. He cleaned up in his 20's...he had been clean & sober for about 10 years when I meet him. Fast forward.... 5 years ago he started taking pain killers for a neck issue... I was nieve and didn't think much of it...	shamrockgrl74	11	477	Nov 12, 2012 by Tasha
	relapse (Preview) hello to all-- After 2 1/2 years of sobriety and really working an AA program (up until 2 months ago) my AH drank Friday night. We all saw it coming and even he said he knew he was in a downward spiral and ready to drink again. I went back to work 3 months ago and this new schedule has prompted him to need to t...	crazycatlady	3	537	Nov 12, 2012 by Auntyaya
	Dropped by my sponsor...I guess? (Preview) Well, I had posted on here last week that my sponsor got really upset with me after she referred me to attend some AA meetings to explore some of my own drinking patterns. I haven't heard back from her since that conversation in which she told me she was busy and didn't know what to do with me. I haven't reac...	Chaya	10	743	Nov 12, 2012 by Chaya
	sharing in meetings meeting etiquette alanon examples ESH honesty sharing (Preview) Hello again. Together, with my sponsor, I have decided to ask a question about Alanon meetings or Alanon in general. As I may have shared, Alanon is my last loose end I have had to tie in my recovery/addiction process in my life. When I feel afraid to share, though, my process is interrupted. This has not...	AllieinAlanon	9	6496	Nov 11, 2012 by hotrod
	apology accepted???????????? (Preview) Last night at our open AA meeting I apologized for my behavior 2 weeks ago to all that were sitting there in regards to my AH. I didn't feel that he got it even though I made it clear as mud. I felt that I was out of line outing him on some of the things he has done--not my place. I felt it necessary to share it w/ th...	Hoot Nanny	0	293	Nov 10, 2012 by Hoot Nanny
	Manipulation (Preview) Why are alcoholics manipulative? Why do they berate, insult and try to make others feel guilty? What is the best course of action when they do this? Thank You.	Summerseeker	6	501	Nov 11, 2012 by Lyne
	Advice for a newbie (Preview) Hi out there! I have never before dealt with anyone seriously affected by alcoholism. I will say, I have enocuntered certain struggles with some close family members and friends that may over-indulge from time to time, however never someone who is an active AA member and currently dealing with his...	SecondChance	13	564	Nov 11, 2012 by alcfriend
	Funny business with the money (Preview) For the first time in many many years, I have 2 overdraft charges on our checking account. Now, I know I have been lax about taking care of stuff but when I checked the account I realized that AH had been taking out extra cash on debits wherever he went. He basically took out around 400-500 in the past 10 d...	ilovedogs	12	776	Nov 11, 2012 by ilovedogs
	Nothing has changed but everything has changed. (Preview) I shared that I was in a relationship that has been going over ten years. We have never met face to face. Just everyway else to communicate. Best friends, confidants, all very moral and great. It started feeling different. Growing like I suppose we all wish would happen in our lives. But still is fine ju...	Debilyn	8	659	Nov 11, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Closer to bottom (Preview) Hi Everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. Today, I received a call from my father. He hadn't been to work in the last little while and today he said he went to go see his doctor. His doctor put him on anti-depressant medication because he is depressed. he called to tell me tha...	slogan_jim	3	367	Nov 11, 2012 by slogan_jim
	Slow Slow Journey (Preview) I have been trying to work on myself. After deciding it was time to divorce my AH , he decided it was time to convince me he could change. He really had me going there for a while, I was allowing myself to believe him. We were having good talks, had a nice 'date' out and then it came up in a conversation that I di...	TrudyS85	3	330	Nov 10, 2012 by Mattie
	still in a funk (Preview) Ya know, my spouse is promising again to change. I think everytime she makes these promises she actually plans to do it. But in a week or two, she is right back to the old tricks. I told her she's not changing because she doesn't want to. It's me that wants things different. I no longer believe she wil...	Lyne	3	327	Nov 10, 2012 by Tasha
	well... (Preview) Well...as you can see I am on here again after yesterday. Good news can travel fast. I am so glad that I don't have to worry about my health. God is in control. Just yesterday someone famous mentioned that she had thyroid cancer & one of my FB friends just had an operation to remove her thyroid for the s...	Hoot Nanny	2	380	Nov 10, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Newbie here but Old Timer (Preview) I have been reading here as often as work allows and decided it was time to introduce myself. I am a survivor of addiction. Both parents were alcoholics and my mother died from cirrhosis. Both of my brothers are drug addicts, also. I have been married for 26 years to an alcoholic and drug addict that now...	sweetyhide	4	379	Nov 10, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Anxiety Seperation (Preview) After heading down to my first meeting yesterday, I felt a mixture of relief and confusion. I feel I belong there, but Most if not all were still with their partners that have stopped their addictions. I am not, at least not physically. I find that I am still trapped in both mentally and emotionally. E...	aprilla	3	398	Nov 10, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Drinking and Driving (Preview) I know this topic has come up many, many times here, but I'm hoping to re-visit it with your ESH, as I try to examine my own motives. My AH has three DUIs. Because now, he does most of his drinking at home after work (and he works until 11 p.m.), he is not in the environment he used to be in before we were toget...	stephaniej	9	605	Nov 10, 2012 by Pushka
	Finally going to a meeting!!! yay!! (Preview) Hello my MIP family, I am so happy to tell you guys im going to my first F2F meeting on sunday!! and boy do I need it, I had an awful day yesterday and decided to call up the al anon head office in london to find any 'day' meetings in my area, there are two evening meetings near me that I just cant get to as I have t...	Maxine12stepper	3	371	Nov 9, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Very Concerned about Elderly, Alcoholic Mother - Newbie to forum (Preview) Hi everyone. I am new to this forum. My mother is 64, her parents were both alcoholics and she began drinking about 20 years ago when I was in high school. For the most part she is what I would call a relatively high functioning A- she went to work every day, was dependable for any social events, did...	kkhinaustin	3	4080	Nov 9, 2012 by pinkchip
	What about moving on and new relationships???? (Preview) I have a question. I know I feel the need to control things. I know that I get overwhelmed at times and feel stuck. So when it comes to a relationship, what does "let go, let God" mean exactly? I am attracted to A's. Always. My friend said we should go to a local sports pub the other day to try to mee...	katfshh	14	787	Nov 9, 2012 by Chaya
	How do you deal with the void of the past when you grew up in this family disease? (Preview) dear all, if you like, please share with me how you deal with those emotioanl gaps in your life created by alcoholic behaviour. As we know it is not only the liquid itself, but the psychological behaviour connected to that disease. Looking back, my sight got clearer, I understand, I comprehend, I get n...	tortuga	5	526	Nov 9, 2012 by tortuga
	So many feelings (Preview) It's just grief - all these changing feelings from one hour to the next due to my mother dying. It's becoming more real. I wonder how it will be, the funeral, people at the wake. I'm not sure we'll even have anyone due to the storm and people being the age they are. It could just be us. My sis in law will be as s...	tiredtonite	8	459	Nov 9, 2012 by stephaniej
	I am a resentful b_ _ _ch(fill in the blank) (Preview) I have self labeled myself this way today: resentful b*tch. At least, I am this in my own head. I have been working my program, working with my sponsor, forgiving as best as my heart knows how to, but something feels missing. I, at multiple times of the day, pray for my AH and tell my HP that I am giving AH...	ilovedogs	16	2013	Nov 9, 2012 by Debilyn
	briefly... please read! (Preview) This morning I found out that my ultrasound is normal & that it seems that I don't have ovarian cancer. My arthritis doctor thought that was a possibility. Pardon me, but I sometimes think he is a quack! I want to stop seeing him so bad but he prescribes the medicine that lessens my pain. I feel like I a...	Hoot Nanny	3	784	Nov 9, 2012 by Debilyn
	Family involvement (Preview) Well I must say that this week has been a pretty good one for me and the AW. Tuesday night she went to bed early and I stayed up some and watched some TV. My 23 year old daughter called to check on our grandson, who was also sleeping. I had discussed the alcohol use with her mother a while back. Sadly I shou...	hdftby100	3	254	Nov 9, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Once again, reaching for sanity (Preview) Hi everyone, I so appreciate your posts..they help me get in touch with my feelings and experience compassion for all of you and me. Often the last person I feel compassion for is me. I am hurting this morning and I look forward to attending an al anon group and a session with my therapist today. I am e...	PP	8	593	Nov 9, 2012 by Tasha
	He's sending me flowers (Preview) I guess he feels that flowers solve all marriage problems, LOL! I'll gratefully take the flowers but we've got a long way to go and it's not going to get me to Costa Rica either. There are so many things that need to happen and flowers just don't cut the mustard. He kept asking me if I could receive mail h...	ilovedogs	8	598	Nov 9, 2012 by Tasha
	Same Old Story (Preview) My husband summoned me downstairs to watch the President's acceptance speech, when he heard me get up to go to the bathroom. Of course, he had been drinking (like every night). Of course I have no idea how much he had been drinking, but of course he was displaying all his classic signs of being drunk. ...	stephaniej	12	647	Nov 8, 2012 by ilovedogs
	Please prayers for our TT (Preview) TT's Mother passed. Our friend needs our prayers and love. She is a strong little lady, is in that grieving fog now. I know you all will send the all the love you can to her, mip sisters and brothers always do. thankyou, Debilyn	Debilyn	18	466	Nov 8, 2012 by PP
	And the sun comes out... (Preview) Aloha MIP Ohana (family) and good morning. It started out overcast, dark and wet from last nights rain. I wasn't in a very healthy mood until I clicked on here. Another sleepless night with the physical, emotional and mental pain from the police assault, one year to the date tomorrow increasing...	Jerry F	13	484	Nov 8, 2012 by Peggy7
	how to help young daughter (Preview) Hi- I'm new to this. I'm looking for some assistance on how to help my 9 year old daughter. Her father has been in recovery for approx 2 years (although I believe he is using marjiuana). He is verbally and emotionally abusive to me. He frequently over-reacts which results in our daughter suffering. We h...	Niki	4	540	Nov 8, 2012 by Jerry F
	Need to let out the frustration!!!! (Preview) Hi everyone, It's been a while since I've posted here (over a year I think) - I'm much more active on various chatrooms, but I really need a space to be brutally honest about what's going on right now, as I haven't felt able to tell ANYONE what's going on with us since my A and I got engaged last week. Bac...	Loubelou	3	475	Nov 8, 2012 by Mattie
	She cheated :/ what to do ??? (Preview) Mygf is a very bad alchalic she is in rehab now bc when we broke up se drank to a bal .45 and was taken to the hospital but I have been supporting Her thru this all when she wants help and set things in place like not being around when she drinks and sutch she had recintly told me about cheeting on me but i do know s...	Tony48183	6	676	Nov 8, 2012 by Jerry F
	How big are your meetings/groups? (Preview) Hey everyone, I recently became GR of my group and over the last few months (even prior to me being GR), our membership has gone down. We used to get approximately between 6-8 members regularly. Now, it is the same 3 people that come. 2 weeks ago, one member made a point of making a comment that the reason t...	slogan_jim	5	488	Nov 8, 2012 by DavidG
	Much needs advise please (Preview) Hello I'm new to the forum I'd really appreciate some help, advice, feedback on my situation. I don't have anywhere else to turn. I have been with my Boyfriend for over 5 years, he was 22 when we met and drank a lot (a bottle of vodka most nights) but i put this down to being young, drinking with friends,...	Bird Seed	5	451	Nov 8, 2012 by Tasha
	Still confused after a year (Preview) So my A has been sober for over a year and i am still myserable. I dont know why. He is happy and okay and i am back to the begging of despair again. I still dont know how to let go of all the bad things he did in the past i never got a appology or acknowladgement of what he did or didnt do. I am struggling to allow him...	HAguirre	6	515	Nov 8, 2012 by maryjane
	The depths of denial (Preview) There's been some odd awakening, well not odd but interesting awakening in my A friend since we saw Flight. He has had a bazillion questions and is like some little toddler just waking up. While I think it's good I called it quits today. He says he's in contact with his sponsor and has been talking to hi...	AStrongerMe	1	317	Nov 8, 2012 by Jerry F
	Let go, let God~not working (Preview) So I've just spent my entire weekend being depressed about my A plus (plus other addictions), and now today I am so ANGRY. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I am usually a very NICE person and I don't think I can do it tonight. I'm not going to fight; I just feel like I don't want to smile or make &...	Lyne	5	483	Nov 7, 2012 by Lyne
	I'm struggling with patience/let go and let god (Preview) Good morning, I am writing this from my phone on the commute to work. I am really struggling right now with my routine. I am getting very impatient with the progress of certain things and am having a hard time judt letting it go. There are certain things I want out of my life and continually doing the same s...	slogan_jim	4	435	Nov 7, 2012 by pinkchip
	Missed you and need you, and moments of weakness :( (Preview) Hi everyone, Life has had so many changes since my exAF moved away July 16th. I was doing so well. But, last week during the big Hurricane on the East Coast, I started to worry about my exAF. He lives on the Jersey Shore now. We have had only a few texts the entire time he has been gone, no phone or email conv...	katfshh	9	473	Nov 7, 2012 by pinkchip
	My reality (Preview) I'm able to detach enough from this that I can make pretty good decisions. I am not alone in my experience with the family courts in CA. I'm broke after more than 10k in lawyers who were able to do nothing. Precisely because the mediation services CA requires you to go through will not allow lawyers an...	AStrongerMe	3	449	Nov 7, 2012 by katfshh
	cant shake this resentment :( (Preview) Hello all my MIP family, Im really needing some advice, I have been with my A for nearly 5 years now, we parted for 7 months when he became a dry drunk and I (didnt realize at the time, I was a sick as a dog too) but we are back together and both working our own program's and getting on better than we ever have, n...	Maxine12stepper	8	502	Nov 7, 2012 by Maxine12stepper
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.