Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

ofservice · ofservice

I am coming to terms with a marriage cycle of emotional manipulation, compulsive lying and codependency. In accepting what I cannot change, I have always stood my ground when it comes to honesty, and therefore trust. Dishonesty I will always find to be unacceptable behavior, though I have learne...

Katy · Katy

Our 21 year old son has managed to stay in employment, and tomorow moves into his own flat, today I saw him for the first time in two weeks to speak to, how quickly things can change for the better, this time last week his job hung in the balance and he had no permanent place to stay, I have felt so bad for turni...

newwoman · newwoman

I feel like now is not the time for me to even think about practicing detachment. Hindsight is 20/20 and had I known the detach rule during lets say the Christmas escapade with him passed out on the landing of the staircase AFTER he had made such as 'xxx' of both of us at a neighbors house. Yes! Detaching...

Cam0612 · Cam0612

Hello. I'm new to Al-Anon. My husband of ten years (he's 41) recently admitted he is an alcoholic. I've suspected if for about a year but he finally said he words - on his own that is. In two months he has been to a total of four AA meetings. In two months of so called "sobriety" I have caught h...

letlive27 · letlive27

My intelligent, loving, wonderful boyfriend of over a year is an opiate addict. When we first starting dating, I knew he was in recovery and had spend some time in rehab in college. At the time, recovery was something I really respected and admired about him. I thought that it was something he had dealt...

Ontario · Ontario

It seems that the best and worse has happened....my STBXA has become the calm rational loving person I remember from 15 yrs ago...but with someone else. Appears to be sober, but as we no longer see much of each other i do not know. He says he hardly drinks at all. I asked for the divorce. I knew I could no lon...

newwoman · newwoman

Out of irritation which fuels my less than banner behavior of late... I think I am going to shoe polish my car for the drive to the rehab visit with: HEY HONK FOR CLIENT #202. THE S.O.B. HAS BEHAVED FOR 30 DAYS IN A ROW! GO VARSITY!!!!! And of course, tie mylar balloons to every mirror.

cinders · cinders

I have tried so many many times to get into the meeting room here and never been able to. Is there something I am missing? I follow the link and get to the page but don't see the chat box load. Thoughts?

charli · charli

Hi I am new here, and thought i'd pop by to say hi. I was thinking about going to an al-anon group but they are too far away for me to go so I thought I'd see if there was some thing online. Does this forum act like discussions had in the group sessions? x -- Edited by charli on Thursday 31st of January 2013 08:32...

tortuga · tortuga

Dear MIP I was lately much focusing on me and my relationship with the A. I was scared to break up (and still am), also because I know that some kind of loneliness creeps up on me. But today I am ready to use this 'silence' and use it more in my favour. I started my recovery 9 years ago. at that time I was overwh...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I have been feeling a little down but am seeming to get back up! Financial situations have brought me down because my AH has been worrying again... I just try to let it go & let God one day at a time. I also have been feeling a little stupid lately. I am just saying that I feel that way...I am not depressed...

lissa34 · lissa34

I was wondering if anyone could answer a question. I have heard a lot of talk about "bearing all" whether it be to a therapist or even on these boards. I have heard of instances where someone has said something that was then used to report them to child protective services or the police. In...

lissa34 · lissa34

I have been "looking in" on this site for about 2 years now. It has taken this long to understand that I can't do this alone. I still have not been to f2f meetings because I can barely make myself leave the house to take my kids to school and then pick them up. I have 3 wonderful children- girl 1...

Tigger · Tigger

Meeting scheduled in the al-anon chat room...TOPICS are: amends; laughter; take what you like and leave the rest

cRaZyJaDe · cRaZyJaDe

Last night my ABF got a call from a drinking buddy of his (he would say friend, but I know better) asking if he'd help him fix his car. - At 9pm. He asked if I minded if he went (not that it would matter either way) but I calmly told him that he was an adult, and that was his decision. Normally I would have...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

6 years of hell just ended. Just like that. 1 hour, one person who took the time to really look at everything and really listen and... its over. The CPS lady (child protective services) left at 8pm. Was here a little over an hour. Talked to my oldest and youngest, then me. I could tell she read everyt...

imom · imom

I would love to hear from others who have divorced their A. I am really struggling with my decision. I did not make the decision in haste. I had finally reached my breaking point and to be quite honest I mostly did it because I thought it would convince him to go into treatment. Now I am left with an extra ang...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Reading todays message in ODAAT let me reflect on myself and think about what I have done for so long not really knowing what I was doing only hurt me. I'm so grateful for what I have learned in Al-anon and to find my HP to help me see. I pray for the wisdom to realize that progress begins only when I am ready to...

SaRw · SaRw

I know I am supposed to work on my recovery and my AH is supposed to work on his but I can't fight the urge to jump in. After 28 days of rehab and 2 weeks of intensive out patient he has relapsed. He is in worse shape now then the day I dropped him off. He lays in bed all day, he hasn't eaten or showered in three d...

Jeslr · Jeslr

I was with a recovering alcoholic for 1 year. He is 37 and I am 21 we moved into an apartment together and within two days he was drinking. not a functioning alcoholic, lost his job, was mean to me ( calling me names) this lasted for two weeks him drinking everyday. I stayed with him that time. He sobered up g...

imom · imom

My AH is so furious about the divorce that he is employing bullying tactics. I try very hard not to engage in the conversations he starts, but I feel the need to defend myself. I was just reading last night in Getting Them Sober that you should not defend yourself because it makes you look as though you did...

Dsouth379 · Dsouth379

I've been with my husband for 10 years. We've been through it all, good times and extremely bad times. He's been to five rehabs since we got together. The last time was march last year, went away for three months out of state. So his one year mark would be coming up soon. We have two kids, son is 7 daughter is...

Missy123 · Missy123

Hi there peole I wish to join in and be a part of a group who knows what its like being me to some degree and would appreciate any support and willing to offer mine where needed. Look forward to hearing from anyone.

oldergal · oldergal

they CAN get through things without self-sabotaging? Do you know? Or have ideas? ...oldergal

hope4ever · hope4ever

Do you ever feel like you are holding yourself back? I grew up in such fear and was always afraid to try new things. It just wasn't safe to explore things I liked ect...Well, this has affected me my whole life. I seem to not be living my life to the fullest and I hold myself back. Not to sound egotistical...

leeno · leeno

I was active in Alanon for 13 years and then all of a sudden left the program. I need to get back to it and learn once again how to treat myself well. I need all the help I can get. Glad to be back on board.

oldergal · oldergal

I would like to respectfully ask "how are we Al-Anoner's doing" in your opinion. Do we seem like we are "getting it" when it comes to the recovery of our A-loved ones? Do we seem determined, whimpy, still to Co-Dependent,...maybe a little more of this or that .....would love to h...

tortuga · tortuga

it has been said that recovery is never progressing in a straight line up, it is more like 2steps forward, 3 steps backward and so on...slowly. Today I'm sad. I let myself go back yesterday, to my ex ABF. He wanted to contact me again, and I let him, yes, because I miss him, or the idea of him. That's why I cal...

1976love · 1976love

So the kids are in rare form today. I work with kdg kids all day, and they are acting better than mine right now. Finaly come home start the laundry, start dinner, break up a fight with my middle son and baby girl...all in the mean while anticipating my AH phone call to see how things are going and feeling...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Opened up a fortune cookie for lunch: Quote: Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you...... I don't know but it makes sense to me in the fact I was always looking for trouble you might say. Things like: Finding out if my son was OK Tracking him down Calling messaging emails.......endless ema...

Minaret · Minaret

I don't know if this will ever end...the surprises, the blows mentally to my peace of mind...my AH had a friend recommended him for a really good job with good pay. He works in summer but is usually on unemployment in winter and drinks more heavily. The co-worker from the other job that recommended him d...

Path to Serenity · Path to Serenity

A son started on another binge 3 days ago - heard the (my) truck leave the driveway around 11:30 last nite after I had gone to bed - just enough time to make it to the liquor store before it closes, probably. Got up around 6am this morning and he hadn't come back yet - figured he was at a friends or in jail...t...

oldergal · oldergal

When now you are aware that you have been asleep, caught-up, un-aware, drinking, stuffing, now in recovery from drinking, enabling.... Now how do you find out who you really really are....methods, readings, ESH....Id like to here it all. Thank You....Oldergal

Ojwoman · Ojwoman

My daughter in law will be getting out of treatment this Friday. Through my son I have learned that she views me as a threat and as over-involved with her 5 month old daughter. My husband and I have been taking care of our granddaughter quite a bit as our son has sorted out his new reality. My question is How...

dponlyme · dponlyme

I've been living with my wife's alcoholism for so long that I must have registered at some point in the past and forgot. I found it again thanks to an email that was sent to me by the administraters. maybe they should send out these more frequently. anyway I have been through hell and back over the course o...

sis333 · sis333

I have been recently looking over chat rooms and postings looking for people in a similar position as me? My brother has been an addict for 25 years now. In and out of jail....getting jobs.....doing well for several years....then spriralling into the same old life. I have taken a stand over the yea...

Jayda · Jayda

What my family has been dealing with is my 31 year old brother who has been a drug addict for about 11-12 years. He started of smoking pot, which led to cocaine, and now he's a full blown crack addict and we suspect possibly meth too. The last 6 months have been the worst by far. He has lost everything. His...

davidssibling · davidssibling

I have so much to get of my chest, so I will write it here, maybe this will help. David, if I could only see you one more time, what would I do. Hug you, hold you cry. Yell scream, slap, beat your chest. Would I recognize you, would you me. Would you walk forward, or turn your head. I would tell you all you have m...

Afraidparent · Afraidparent

I am ready to hand over my situation with AD to my HP. I am ready to have no contact. How do I go about this? I am unsure. Do I block emails, her phone number, and her ability to Instant Message me? Everything else is already hers. Her own life, her own home, car, legal issues, bills, etc. She has it all....

sarjint · sarjint

My ex-wife (she divorced me 5 months ago but we are dating/reconciling) has been in and out of recovery for years. A little over a month ago she hit her rock bottom (again?) and is back in AA but also seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist. The difference is that she is actually working the steps this time...

willowtree · willowtree

I have been in the program a while and I am really enjoying it and growing a lot. I have noticed that some long timers seem a little cold-ish. I am one to believe that we should not totally shut off out emotions/feelings and let ourselved feel...I have come across people (including my sponor) who I feel...

el-cee · el-cee

feeling sorry for myself again tonight. teenage son has breached his probation and it looks likely he will go to jail. im angry because he was at the final part and now he has messed it up. his name will be in the local papers again and im really ashamed and embarrassed. im a teacher and i feel like such a hyp...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I'm obsessing this morning and I can't seem to stop it. Is he OK Is he drinking Does he have a job Should I call because I feel like a bad mom and I think I should to be nice....No I don't want to because I.m fearful JEEZ God please help me this morning I pray. Please renew my strength to overcome this.

Annie1234 · Annie1234

Thanks to my HP, and some good friends, I made it through the weekend. My AH went to DUI hotel for four days. I was concerned because it was a very busy weekend that we were supposed to work a project together. I feel empowered and hopeful. He came out of the weekend very humbled. He was astonished at t...

Number30 · Number30

I wasn't going to post today, but I felt led to share my new mantra. It's been a long 2 weeks. My grandmother passed away Friday night and my chaotic house became a vortex. Last night was hell as my AH went through withdrawal and kept waking me up to "help" with the paranoia and hallucination...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

My son came by my work today to see if I could print out something for him. He's selling his car. :( He looked really good except for the anxiety and worry he has. Can't seem to find a job. SOBER....and for a time too because he wasn't even shaking. I in turn had a tough time not wanting to help him. WOW...

oldergal · oldergal

Just for today, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime. Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln s...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Long story short: AH is making an attempt at normalcy around here. His mother just passed away and he put on the show for his family but I think he was quite grateful that I flew across the country to be there with him. He has been reaching out and I've been feeling quite confused. Just a few weeks ago he w...

newwoman · newwoman

Thank you EVERYONE yet again for saving my a@!.... In response to PinkChip and the "session question"... that is next month and costs 600.00. (a shotgun shell is a lot cheaper! I AM KIDDING) But really, how about you yucko's pay me 600.00 for the trip and my time. How about that? I like that id...

bsketlady · bsketlady

hi all - i've been on the AA page and it was very helpful and they referred me to over here :) what great posts to read here, and they are so helpful! i am really struggling with trusting my husband again...i see things aren't right i can verify he has lied beyond a shadow of a doubt about stupid stuff like no...

1976love · 1976love

I have to share this with everyone! Need a little background first. I married for the first time very young (19) and had two beautiful boys from that marriage. They are currently 14 and 11. I met my current AH married him and he adopted my boys and than we had a baby girl and life went on. Well, as you al...

BethMc · BethMc

Hi all. Sorry, this is going to be kinda long. I feel like I don't have many I can talk to about this who would understand. My sister is the alcoholic in this case. She lives just caddy-corner from me, a block away. Her son is 6, my son is 7, so go to school together, I see them every day, etc. Sometimes latel...

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

I want them to move out. I want them to stop drinking. I want my space back. I'm so angry. I just recently found out that I can't say anything to her without flipping out. She asked me if I were in her shoes would I get a job. I said yes. Normally I just nod and give her the answer she wants. That's what I should ha...

healing_rain2001 · healing_rain2001

Hi everyone, I am new to this board. But I am not new to the ravages of addiction. I am going through a particularly hard time right now so I guess I need to get some things off my chest and get some feedback. My mother has struggled with addictive issues for close to 30 years. She has never admitte...

newwoman · newwoman

29 January 2013 Dear Ms. XXXXX ,Regarding the request for family to complete the client questionnaire, first of all client #202 and myself arent family, we "xxxx". Second, whatever insight I have to offer in the overall scheme of his treatment isnt worth a pinch of monkey "xxxx&qu...

Picksims · Picksims

My husband and I have been together off and on for the last ten years. I was 14 when we met, he was 18. I have a four year old daughter and I am currently almost six months pregnant with our second little girl. During the beginning stages of our relationship, he was a drinker from the start, but me being so you...

imom · imom

My kids convinced my AH to seek treatment. He is telling all of us that he will do it but only for the kids because mommy won't like me anyway. Why am I letting this bother me? I told him I loved him and that maybe if he can't get help we could call off the divorce. He just keeps saying forget it because you won't...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. This weekend I was flipping through the TV in an effort to pass the time. I came across a show that profiled aboriginal canadians and some of their struggles. They profiled a comedian by the name of Howie Miller. I had heard of him be...

resilientsparks · resilientsparks

Hi I am the wife of an alcoholic who is not drinking yet very abusive. Its one of those days, got yelled at at the end of a long tiring day at work. Angry hurting and manipulating husband. Somehow I ahve loved him. Somehow I still do. Yet this is one of thsoe days. Trying to meet my demands at work. Keep my hea...

Pushka · Pushka

First off the whole family is sick, I have the flu and the kids have bacterial ear infections. My son is the worst out of the two of them. He is also running a fever. They are on antibotics. I'm sucking it up. I was informed over this past weekend that SBTAX went to church and he's compelled to tell me he...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Emotional manipulation (Preview) I am coming to terms with a marriage cycle of emotional manipulation, compulsive lying and codependency. In accepting what I cannot change, I have always stood my ground when it comes to honesty, and therefore trust. Dishonesty I will always find to be unacceptable behavior, though I have learne...	ofservice	1	571	Feb 2, 2013 by hotrod
	where there is life there is hope (Preview) Our 21 year old son has managed to stay in employment, and tomorow moves into his own flat, today I saw him for the first time in two weeks to speak to, how quickly things can change for the better, this time last week his job hung in the balance and he had no permanent place to stay, I have felt so bad for turni...	Katy	5	255	Feb 2, 2013 by el-cee
	Detach not a chance…engage full tilt…you betcha! (Preview) I feel like now is not the time for me to even think about practicing detachment. Hindsight is 20/20 and had I known the detach rule during lets say the Christmas escapade with him passed out on the landing of the staircase AFTER he had made such as 'xxx' of both of us at a neighbors house. Yes! Detaching...	newwoman	2	347	Feb 2, 2013 by hopeful4ever
	Desperately seeking sanity..... (Preview) Hello. I'm new to Al-Anon. My husband of ten years (he's 41) recently admitted he is an alcoholic. I've suspected if for about a year but he finally said he words - on his own that is. In two months he has been to a total of four AA meetings. In two months of so called "sobriety" I have caught h...	Cam0612	4	271	Feb 2, 2013 by Cam0612
	Live-in bf oxy addict (Preview) My intelligent, loving, wonderful boyfriend of over a year is an opiate addict. When we first starting dating, I knew he was in recovery and had spend some time in rehab in college. At the time, recovery was something I really respected and admired about him. I thought that it was something he had dealt...	letlive27	2	324	Feb 2, 2013 by Mattie
	He is a new man for someone else... (Preview) It seems that the best and worse has happened....my STBXA has become the calm rational loving person I remember from 15 yrs ago...but with someone else. Appears to be sober, but as we no longer see much of each other i do not know. He says he hardly drinks at all. I asked for the divorce. I knew I could no lon...	Ontario	9	348	Feb 2, 2013 by Ontario
	On a Roll with Visit to Rehab (Preview) Out of irritation which fuels my less than banner behavior of late... I think I am going to shoe polish my car for the drive to the rehab visit with: HEY HONK FOR CLIENT #202. THE S.O.B. HAS BEHAVED FOR 30 DAYS IN A ROW! GO VARSITY!!!!! And of course, tie mylar balloons to every mirror.	newwoman	0	181	Feb 2, 2013 by newwoman
	Meeting room (Preview) I have tried so many many times to get into the meeting room here and never been able to. Is there something I am missing? I follow the link and get to the page but don't see the chat box load. Thoughts?	cinders	9	221	Feb 2, 2013 by cinders
	Newbie (Preview) Hi I am new here, and thought i'd pop by to say hi. I was thinking about going to an al-anon group but they are too far away for me to go so I thought I'd see if there was some thing online. Does this forum act like discussions had in the group sessions? x -- Edited by charli on Thursday 31st of January 2013 08:32...	charli	3	235	Feb 2, 2013 by f2fmember
	recovery and our family of origin: taking care of the INNER CHILD (Preview) Dear MIP I was lately much focusing on me and my relationship with the A. I was scared to break up (and still am), also because I know that some kind of loneliness creeps up on me. But today I am ready to use this 'silence' and use it more in my favour. I started my recovery 9 years ago. at that time I was overwh...	tortuga	3	2124	Feb 2, 2013 by f2fmember
	feeling a litttle down; but getting back up! (Preview) I have been feeling a little down but am seeming to get back up! Financial situations have brought me down because my AH has been worrying again... I just try to let it go & let God one day at a time. I also have been feeling a little stupid lately. I am just saying that I feel that way...I am not depressed...	Hoot Nanny	1	330	Feb 2, 2013 by f2fmember
	Face to Face meetings and trust (Preview) I was wondering if anyone could answer a question. I have heard a lot of talk about "bearing all" whether it be to a therapist or even on these boards. I have heard of instances where someone has said something that was then used to report them to child protective services or the police. In...	lissa34	5	358	Feb 2, 2013 by hotrod
	Help!!! (Preview) I have been "looking in" on this site for about 2 years now. It has taken this long to understand that I can't do this alone. I still have not been to f2f meetings because I can barely make myself leave the house to take my kids to school and then pick them up. I have 3 wonderful children- girl 1...	lissa34	7	541	Feb 2, 2013 by hotrod
	FRIDAY MORNING MEETING 9AM (EST) - TOPICS are: amends; laughter; take what you like and leave the rest (Preview) Meeting scheduled in the al-anon chat room...TOPICS are: amends; laughter; take what you like and leave the rest	Tigger	0	223	Feb 1, 2013 by Tigger
	I've figured it out - I think. (Preview) Last night my ABF got a call from a drinking buddy of his (he would say friend, but I know better) asking if he'd help him fix his car. - At 9pm. He asked if I minded if he went (not that it would matter either way) but I calmly told him that he was an adult, and that was his decision. Normally I would have...	cRaZyJaDe	7	396	Feb 1, 2013 by cRaZyJaDe
	Afraid to trust this but (Preview) 6 years of hell just ended. Just like that. 1 hour, one person who took the time to really look at everything and really listen and... its over. The CPS lady (child protective services) left at 8pm. Was here a little over an hour. Talked to my oldest and youngest, then me. I could tell she read everyt...	AStrongerMe	10	319	Feb 1, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Doubt (Preview) I would love to hear from others who have divorced their A. I am really struggling with my decision. I did not make the decision in haste. I had finally reached my breaking point and to be quite honest I mostly did it because I thought it would convince him to go into treatment. Now I am left with an extra ang...	imom	11	263	Feb 1, 2013 by Temple
	ODAAT (Preview) Reading todays message in ODAAT let me reflect on myself and think about what I have done for so long not really knowing what I was doing only hurt me. I'm so grateful for what I have learned in Al-anon and to find my HP to help me see. I pray for the wisdom to realize that progress begins only when I am ready to...	Cathyinaz	1	279	Feb 1, 2013 by hotrod
	Relapse after rehab (Preview) I know I am supposed to work on my recovery and my AH is supposed to work on his but I can't fight the urge to jump in. After 28 days of rehab and 2 weeks of intensive out patient he has relapsed. He is in worse shape now then the day I dropped him off. He lays in bed all day, he hasn't eaten or showered in three d...	SaRw	6	321	Feb 1, 2013 by midas
	Leaving an Alcoholic (Preview) I was with a recovering alcoholic for 1 year. He is 37 and I am 21 we moved into an apartment together and within two days he was drinking. not a functioning alcoholic, lost his job, was mean to me ( calling me names) this lasted for two weeks him drinking everyday. I stayed with him that time. He sobered up g...	Jeslr	3	379	Feb 1, 2013 by jenmc2013
	When will the bullying stop (Preview) My AH is so furious about the divorce that he is employing bullying tactics. I try very hard not to engage in the conversations he starts, but I feel the need to defend myself. I was just reading last night in Getting Them Sober that you should not defend yourself because it makes you look as though you did...	imom	4	1232	Feb 1, 2013 by Ebunny59
	New here- suspect alcoholic/addict husband stole sons medication. Need advice. (Preview) I've been with my husband for 10 years. We've been through it all, good times and extremely bad times. He's been to five rehabs since we got together. The last time was march last year, went away for three months out of state. So his one year mark would be coming up soon. We have two kids, son is 7 daughter is...	Dsouth379	6	305	Feb 1, 2013 by jenmc2013
	New comer needing support (Preview) Hi there peole I wish to join in and be a part of a group who knows what its like being me to some degree and would appreciate any support and willing to offer mine where needed. Look forward to hearing from anyone.	Missy123	10	231	Feb 1, 2013 by Missy123
	WHY IS IT THAT ALCOHOLICS DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT... (Preview) they CAN get through things without self-sabotaging? Do you know? Or have ideas? ...oldergal	oldergal	7	389	Feb 1, 2013 by hotrod
	I hold myself back from more good in my life! (Preview) Do you ever feel like you are holding yourself back? I grew up in such fear and was always afraid to try new things. It just wasn't safe to explore things I liked ect...Well, this has affected me my whole life. I seem to not be living my life to the fullest and I hold myself back. Not to sound egotistical...	hope4ever	2	420	Jan 31, 2013 by f2fmember
	Need to surrender (Preview) I was active in Alanon for 13 years and then all of a sudden left the program. I need to get back to it and learn once again how to treat myself well. I need all the help I can get. Glad to be back on board.	leeno	1	177	Feb 1, 2013 by f2fmember
	TO RECOVERING AA'S (Preview) I would like to respectfully ask "how are we Al-Anoner's doing" in your opinion. Do we seem like we are "getting it" when it comes to the recovery of our A-loved ones? Do we seem determined, whimpy, still to Co-Dependent,...maybe a little more of this or that .....would love to h...	oldergal	5	453	Feb 1, 2013 by f2fmember
	letting go my drug of choice! (Preview) it has been said that recovery is never progressing in a straight line up, it is more like 2steps forward, 3 steps backward and so on...slowly. Today I'm sad. I let myself go back yesterday, to my ex ABF. He wanted to contact me again, and I let him, yes, because I miss him, or the idea of him. That's why I cal...	tortuga	6	519	Feb 1, 2013 by el-cee
	just a quick vent (Preview) So the kids are in rare form today. I work with kdg kids all day, and they are acting better than mine right now. Finaly come home start the laundry, start dinner, break up a fight with my middle son and baby girl...all in the mean while anticipating my AH phone call to see how things are going and feeling...	1976love	2	223	Feb 1, 2013 by hotrod
	Fortune Cookie (Preview) Opened up a fortune cookie for lunch: Quote: Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you...... I don't know but it makes sense to me in the fact I was always looking for trouble you might say. Things like: Finding out if my son was OK Tracking him down Calling messaging emails.......endless ema...	Cathyinaz	4	301	Jan 31, 2013 by AStrongerMe
	Jobs for your A? (Preview) I don't know if this will ever end...the surprises, the blows mentally to my peace of mind...my AH had a friend recommended him for a really good job with good pay. He works in summer but is usually on unemployment in winter and drinks more heavily. The co-worker from the other job that recommended him d...	Minaret	2	260	Jan 31, 2013 by AStrongerMe
	The insanity never stops!! (Preview) A son started on another binge 3 days ago - heard the (my) truck leave the driveway around 11:30 last nite after I had gone to bed - just enough time to make it to the liquor store before it closes, probably. Got up around 6am this morning and he hadn't come back yet - figured he was at a friends or in jail...t...	Path to Serenity	7	412	Jan 31, 2013 by abbyalana
	HOW DO YOU BECOME YOURSELF AGAIN... (Preview) When now you are aware that you have been asleep, caught-up, un-aware, drinking, stuffing, now in recovery from drinking, enabling.... Now how do you find out who you really really are....methods, readings, ESH....Id like to here it all. Thank You....Oldergal	oldergal	3	813	Jan 31, 2013 by abbyalana
	New to this (Preview) My daughter in law will be getting out of treatment this Friday. Through my son I have learned that she views me as a threat and as over-involved with her 5 month old daughter. My husband and I have been taking care of our granddaughter quite a bit as our son has sorted out his new reality. My question is How...	Ojwoman	3	289	Jan 31, 2013 by Ojwoman
	forgot i registered here (Preview) I've been living with my wife's alcoholism for so long that I must have registered at some point in the past and forgot. I found it again thanks to an email that was sent to me by the administraters. maybe they should send out these more frequently. anyway I have been through hell and back over the course o...	dponlyme	3	201	Jan 31, 2013 by dponlyme
	sisterly love (Preview) I have been recently looking over chat rooms and postings looking for people in a similar position as me? My brother has been an addict for 25 years now. In and out of jail....getting jobs.....doing well for several years....then spriralling into the same old life. I have taken a stand over the yea...	sis333	4	218	Jan 31, 2013 by Jill
	Crack addict brother (Preview) What my family has been dealing with is my 31 year old brother who has been a drug addict for about 11-12 years. He started of smoking pot, which led to cocaine, and now he's a full blown crack addict and we suspect possibly meth too. The last 6 months have been the worst by far. He has lost everything. His...	Jayda	9	550	Jan 31, 2013 by sis333
	To my brother (Preview) I have so much to get of my chest, so I will write it here, maybe this will help. David, if I could only see you one more time, what would I do. Hug you, hold you cry. Yell scream, slap, beat your chest. Would I recognize you, would you me. Would you walk forward, or turn your head. I would tell you all you have m...	davidssibling	7	548	Jan 31, 2013 by sis333
	Do I block her calls? Emails? IM's? (Preview) I am ready to hand over my situation with AD to my HP. I am ready to have no contact. How do I go about this? I am unsure. Do I block emails, her phone number, and her ability to Instant Message me? Everything else is already hers. Her own life, her own home, car, legal issues, bills, etc. She has it all....	Afraidparent	4	267	Jan 31, 2013 by f2fmember
	Feeling guilty because I miss some of her alcoholic behaviors (Preview) My ex-wife (she divorced me 5 months ago but we are dating/reconciling) has been in and out of recovery for years. A little over a month ago she hit her rock bottom (again?) and is back in AA but also seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist. The difference is that she is actually working the steps this time...	sarjint	9	386	Jan 31, 2013 by sarjint
	An observation about alanon (Preview) I have been in the program a while and I am really enjoying it and growing a lot. I have noticed that some long timers seem a little cold-ish. I am one to believe that we should not totally shut off out emotions/feelings and let ourselved feel...I have come across people (including my sponor) who I feel...	willowtree	9	390	Jan 31, 2013 by willowtree
	poor me (Preview) feeling sorry for myself again tonight. teenage son has breached his probation and it looks likely he will go to jail. im angry because he was at the final part and now he has messed it up. his name will be in the local papers again and im really ashamed and embarrassed. im a teacher and i feel like such a hyp...	el-cee	4	241	Jan 31, 2013 by maryjane
	Obsessing (Preview) I'm obsessing this morning and I can't seem to stop it. Is he OK Is he drinking Does he have a job Should I call because I feel like a bad mom and I think I should to be nice....No I don't want to because I.m fearful JEEZ God please help me this morning I pray. Please renew my strength to overcome this.	Cathyinaz	4	253	Jan 31, 2013 by el-cee
	Got through the weekend (Preview) Thanks to my HP, and some good friends, I made it through the weekend. My AH went to DUI hotel for four days. I was concerned because it was a very busy weekend that we were supposed to work a project together. I feel empowered and hopeful. He came out of the weekend very humbled. He was astonished at t...	Annie1234	3	325	Jan 31, 2013 by el-cee
	My new mantra (Preview) I wasn't going to post today, but I felt led to share my new mantra. It's been a long 2 weeks. My grandmother passed away Friday night and my chaotic house became a vortex. Last night was hell as my AH went through withdrawal and kept waking me up to "help" with the paranoia and hallucination...	Number30	5	230	Jan 31, 2013 by el-cee
	I had a visit this morning (Preview) My son came by my work today to see if I could print out something for him. He's selling his car. :( He looked really good except for the anxiety and worry he has. Can't seem to find a job. SOBER....and for a time too because he wasn't even shaking. I in turn had a tough time not wanting to help him. WOW...	Cathyinaz	4	352	Jan 31, 2013 by Auntyaya
	"JUST FOR TODAY" (Preview) Just for today, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime. Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln s...	oldergal	3	295	Jan 31, 2013 by el-cee
	AH is trying to reconnect with me (Preview) Long story short: AH is making an attempt at normalcy around here. His mother just passed away and he put on the show for his family but I think he was quite grateful that I flew across the country to be there with him. He has been reaching out and I've been feeling quite confused. Just a few weeks ago he w...	ilovedogs	3	388	Jan 31, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Follow Up to REALITY CHECK NEEDED Posting Regarding Visit to A in Rehab (Preview) Thank you EVERYONE yet again for saving my a@!.... In response to PinkChip and the "session question"... that is next month and costs 600.00. (a shotgun shell is a lot cheaper! I AM KIDDING) But really, how about you yucko's pay me 600.00 for the trip and my time. How about that? I like that id...	newwoman	4	266	Jan 31, 2013 by Afraidparent
	just dpn't get it! (Preview) hi all - i've been on the AA page and it was very helpful and they referred me to over here :) what great posts to read here, and they are so helpful! i am really struggling with trusting my husband again...i see things aren't right i can verify he has lied beyond a shadow of a doubt about stupid stuff like no...	bsketlady	5	461	Jan 30, 2013 by Afraidparent
	The rewards are off the charts (Preview) I have to share this with everyone! Need a little background first. I married for the first time very young (19) and had two beautiful boys from that marriage. They are currently 14 and 11. I met my current AH married him and he adopted my boys and than we had a baby girl and life went on. Well, as you al...	1976love	3	258	Jan 30, 2013 by Annie1234
	Worried about my nephew (Preview) Hi all. Sorry, this is going to be kinda long. I feel like I don't have many I can talk to about this who would understand. My sister is the alcoholic in this case. She lives just caddy-corner from me, a block away. Her son is 6, my son is 7, so go to school together, I see them every day, etc. Sometimes latel...	BethMc	5	329	Jan 30, 2013 by BethMc
	Not taking care of me.... (Preview) I want them to move out. I want them to stop drinking. I want my space back. I'm so angry. I just recently found out that I can't say anything to her without flipping out. She asked me if I were in her shoes would I get a job. I said yes. Normally I just nod and give her the answer she wants. That's what I should ha...	StargazerLily	2	199	Jan 30, 2013 by abbyalana
	So confused if I am doing the right thing... (Preview) Hi everyone, I am new to this board. But I am not new to the ravages of addiction. I am going through a particularly hard time right now so I guess I need to get some things off my chest and get some feedback. My mother has struggled with addictive issues for close to 30 years. She has never admitte...	healing_rain2001	1	259	Jan 30, 2013 by pinkchip
	Copy of Letter Composed to A's Rehab Facility.... (Preview) 29 January 2013 Dear Ms. XXXXX ,Regarding the request for family to complete the client questionnaire, first of all client #202 and myself arent family, we "xxxx". Second, whatever insight I have to offer in the overall scheme of his treatment isnt worth a pinch of monkey "xxxx&qu...	newwoman	2	332	Jan 30, 2013 by Temple
	Worried about my husband... advice? alocholic odouls relapse advice (Preview) My husband and I have been together off and on for the last ten years. I was 14 when we met, he was 18. I have a four year old daughter and I am currently almost six months pregnant with our second little girl. During the beginning stages of our relationship, he was a drinker from the start, but me being so you...	Picksims	8	7217	Jan 30, 2013 by Mattie
	Getting treatment? (Preview) My kids convinced my AH to seek treatment. He is telling all of us that he will do it but only for the kids because mommy won't like me anyway. Why am I letting this bother me? I told him I loved him and that maybe if he can't get help we could call off the divorce. He just keeps saying forget it because you won't...	imom	1	256	Jan 30, 2013 by Too hard
	Getting over it (share) (Preview) Hi everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. This weekend I was flipping through the TV in an effort to pass the time. I came across a show that profiled aboriginal canadians and some of their struggles. They profiled a comedian by the name of Howie Miller. I had heard of him be...	slogan_jim	3	293	Jan 30, 2013 by Jerry F
	New here (Preview) Hi I am the wife of an alcoholic who is not drinking yet very abusive. Its one of those days, got yelled at at the end of a long tiring day at work. Angry hurting and manipulating husband. Somehow I ahve loved him. Somehow I still do. Yet this is one of thsoe days. Trying to meet my demands at work. Keep my hea...	resilientsparks	2	216	Jan 30, 2013 by Theoceancalls
	Frustrated .. Vent (Preview) First off the whole family is sick, I have the flu and the kids have bacterial ear infections. My son is the worst out of the two of them. He is also running a fever. They are on antibotics. I'm sucking it up. I was informed over this past weekend that SBTAX went to church and he's compelled to tell me he...	Pushka	1	227	Jan 30, 2013 by ilovedogs
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.