Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

chinup · chinup

so far ive come to realize that withh all my childhood abuse has effected my relationships with men but im not so sure how its effected my relationships with men or boyfreinds yet i hope i dont fall into denial with this,i dont know how it may have effected my relationships with my siblings since all of my...

blondie99 · blondie99

I was talking to a dear friend who ran into my STBXAH a couple days ago. She said that he was saying "I'm so happy, everything's going so well, I'm doing this and this and this and (Blondie) and I have agreed to be friends even after the divorce." Yeah, right. Pink cloud time - I've seen and heard...

cRaZyJaDe · cRaZyJaDe

I posted a few weeks ago about detaching from my ABF. Tonight I was on my way out the door to my 2nd F2F meeting. On the way out he asked if I would pick up some AA pamphlets for him. My first thought was "sure", but as I was driving to the meeting, I started wondering if I should. I mean, if he wa...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

The topic leader last night shared the March 12th reading from "Hope for Today." It was all about focusing on the positives in life and even jotting a positive word on a daily calendar. I hadn't been to a meeting in a couple of weeks and was worried that I might have a meltdown if the sharing at t...

Katy · Katy

I was just talking to someone yesterday, and said I could never make out I was ill to claim for benifits because I would not like to cry wolf and be punished for it!, They replied that makes me think of your relationship with your husband? and went on to say is that how I see life? He said that at our age we'r...

sunflower22 · sunflower22

Hello, This is my first time on these boards. I have been in Alanon now for 90 days and have had a sponsor since day 1. She at first was very attentive towards me, very encouraging, helpful and motivating. She would say how I am so similar to her and almost like I was her favorite of all her sponsee's. We...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I've been trying to straighten this all out in my head lately, as I come closer and closer to the end of my rope with my AH. I do still struggle with accepting that his addiction/drinking is his business, although I've gotten much better at accepting that. But then we have the whole universe of "un...

dponlyme · dponlyme

It's almost as if the waiting is finally over and I can feel comfortable again. She hadn't drank for over two weeks and now finally I can relax and not have all that terrible hope hanging over my head. She is a mean angry drunk even moreso than usual due to us already at odds with one another... but she is s...

mercedes1959 · mercedes1959

-- Edited by mercedes1959 on Thursday 21st of March 2013 12:54:17 PM

beckon11 · beckon11

Hi friends, Wondering if any of you have abandonment issues,and pain. I have done so much work on this.Yet it still can really pull me down. Im doing work again on the inner child. Would love to hear from anyone who has experienced this. I know alanon helps alot also. thx beckon11

Jozie · Jozie

Have ya Ever Stepped Down off your Ego Button and had an 'Auh..Hah... Moment' Resently I have been having some "Stinkin thinkin's" going on within my Head, and I have been Reading the Lit, and Doing Alot of differant tools that i Learned to Really get to the surface of it! Well when I Sat Down a...

Heather 68 · Heather 68

Hello All, next chapter of my saga....my ex AB has sent me a few texts trying to stab at I me, I respond with messages of my positive recovery and courage to change my situation. That shuts him up for a day or so, but I finally blocked him from contacting me...again. My last "I love you" but this i...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

I've been so worried and anxious about this court date that AH and I have on March 27. He keeps referring to it as "me vs him" and today I reminded him that it is not me vs him, it is the State vs him. I received my subpoena the other day, which clearly states this. He still thinks he will waltz in fr...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I am really confused. The alcoholic in my life is my boyfriend and we have been through so many " episodes " of his drinking causing complete chaos, weekly, bi weekly.. like you would get your mail or visit the gym. He has embarassed himself in front of me because of the amount of blacking out...

lnc12 · lnc12

First of all, I want to thank everyone here for being so kind and accepting! Oh, and most of all encouraging! It's just so great knowing that I can come on here, vent my hurts and frustrations, and I won't be judged. After almost 7 months of separation from my AH, I did something shocking this morning. I r...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp Peeps... After Some Much Needed Work on ME! I have Found that I Can No Longer Allow "Pity Pot" time for My Woo's... This Last Week has been a Roller Coaster of Emotions for me, and Frankly I'm just Sick to Death of Allowing it time of My Thoughts, & My Actions... I Have Found that when I S...

blondie99 · blondie99

So, as the divorce is progressing and people are starting to find out about what has happened between my STBXAH and me, I have been receiving information on happenings that have occurred, unknowingly to me, over the last several years. The most interesting thing I've heard so far is that both my mom an...

ClearTheFog · ClearTheFog

I have been getting so much out of this board, in lurker-mode, for the past few months. I 'tried' Al-Anon 11 years ago right as my 13 year marriage to my then alcoholic husband was ending. I didn't go back to the meetings at that time . The first meeting I went to had about 30 people in it, which was terrifyin...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I want to post about three things, but I dont want to post three times my creative side wants to tie them in together lets see if I can manage it eh? #1 I love second hand stores and when I get a few minutes/half a morning, I go to town for just that, to browse through my favorites before getting groceries, lun...

John · John

I read your post here, and I hear you, I feel you. We are not that different when it comes to the feelings associated with loving an alcoholic or addict. We hurt, we guess, we question, we wonder, we fear, we give up trying, and then try harder, we attach and then detach, we hold on with all our might, and the...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... I came into this forum last year after going through the Alanon Traditions on this MIP board. i was so impressed. I learned stuff through interacting with the fine people doing this task. At this end of the world keeping Alanon going does take a lot of patience and I feel we need all the help we...

cinders · cinders

I feel like I am in a new stage of grief. I kind of think its a new phase of acceptance. This process sure has been a whirlwind ride of emotions. Most of the time I am doing pretty good and most days I am enjoying my life. I am lonely at times, miss having a partner in my life, someone to hang out with, share s...

Rinn · Rinn

I am so overwhelmed dealing with his last fall off the wagon. He had a huge pain pill problem the last three years. His Dr just gave him more and more then he started buying them when he ran out. It was terrible. We have kids and a mixed family (step kids and shared kids). I feel responsible for holding i...

forestfairy · forestfairy

Hi I'm new to the board and I originally posted this in response to another post, but I'm reposting because I think I should have started a new thread. Much of what I've read here really resonates with me. I too have had my spouse email back a friend and insult them. I too am blamed for everything that goes w...

John · John

Just wanted to let you folks see what your prayers brought about. Max is doing very well, and playing hard and living large. In the beginning of this very short video you can see Lilly Girl tap on Max a few times with her paw..."C'on, play.. its only 2am!" And the fun beguns between them. Thank each an...

gorby928 · gorby928

Hi Im quite new to all of this so please forgive me if I rant a bit. First off I did make the step of going to my first meeting last Friday it felt strange but I was made to feel welcome.It was strange in that I was talking to complete strangers about how my AW problem was affecting me.I do want to go back this wee...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

Tonight my al-anon group discussed rigorous honesty. With ourselves. I really have to say that in relating to this disease, my rigorous honesty lately has been with myself over the last month accepting that my boyfriend is not changing or working on sobriety. At all. All I can do is change myself. As h...

pinnu · pinnu

Hello! I am looking for an online Alanon sponsor to do my steps with. Since I am residing currently in the country where there are no active Alanon meetings available, online meetings would be my only source, Skype chats possible with sponsor. I have separated from my abusive AH but having tough t...

tania31 · tania31

4 days ago my husband admitted to me and his family that he is an alcoholic. He has started AA meetings and is trying to foucs on getting himself help. The thing I am struggling with is that he has asked that we do not speak or see each other for a month as he needs to foucs on himself and can not worry about...

fruitbat · fruitbat

HI This is the first time I have ever spoken to anyone about this Im not sure what to do anymore or how to manage whats going on. My husband has been an alcoholic for around 8years he had a period of around a year when he didnt drink at all, then a few days after xmas we lost our home and have had to move in with a f...

chinup · chinup

what and where do or does one go to or do when you just come to reality of that youve been a victim of child moletation-age 5 several times,child molestation one time age 8 and drugged and raped by a gang age 14.and its now been 40 yrs since this has all happened but just now realizeing it,and done been to the...

Cherubhmm · Cherubhmm

I was reading the upto date posts just now. How familiar. I haven't been on here in a while as I THOUGHT I was coping with partner's drinking. I am not today. In fact I've cried and cried all day and I'm hurting so much inside. I feel dismal and worthless. Since I last posted, he has made a conscious eff...

texasgal · texasgal

I worked an early shift and im outside parked I dont want to get off cuz their isnt anyone to greet me or even care if im home. I texted a friend but they haven't texted back yet. I even called my AH but he has his phone off. I hate the feelings that I have right now. I want to be part of something but im not. We dont...

beckon11 · beckon11

Hi every one.So glad to have found you.I feel so alone!! Dealing with a abusive dry alcoholic mother.Who knows every hurt game there is.Also my best girlfriend just ended our friendship/with no closure at all. I really thought I could trust her.She just acts like she never knew me.Kind of fami...

lmyya · lmyya

This seems like such a wonderful group. I have very little experience with Al-Anon but I am married to someone who did the 12 steps before I met him. I love him very much. We are going to have our first baby any day now-- a son. However, I think he needs some help. For the past year or more, I keep having the s...

texasgal · texasgal

I had a pleasant Saturday and AH did not come home but this morning at 5am my AH text me that he hated his life and he wanted to die. He hadn't said anything like that since he used to drink. One time he took out the shot gun and tried to do it when he was very drunk. I didn't take it lightly and I texted with him for...

Heather 68 · Heather 68

I see the light at the end of the tunnel, it may be far far away but i see it! After about 2 months of a lot of meetings and throwing myself in to the literature i was ready and comfortable enough to ask for more help. I have found a wonderful sponsor from my home meeting, I am overjoyed. I cried when she agreed,...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi everyone.... Had a relaxing day just playing on the computer and watching TV. My son now has a whole lot of money and on the biggest binge of his life. I can't seem to get it out of my mind and don't even want to talk to him at all if he calls me. My choice right? I will pray to my HP that he makes it thoug...

dponlyme · dponlyme

AW has been on the wagon for a couple weeks now and we are having terrible fights. She says I am treating her like she is stupid but my intention is just to let her know that I disagree with her. She seems so hypersensitive to me. I for my part get upset because she gets upset with me when I feel I have done nothi...

mercedes1959 · mercedes1959

The topic is posted here http://meetinginfo.activeboard.com/

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Dear Friends, Last night, I couldn't sleep, (worrying about AH, legal issues, bills....etc.) so I opened up Netflix on my computer and began to browse titles suggested for me. I saw "The Secret" and remembered that someone had mentioned that in a recent F2F meeting. I gave it a try. Wow, wh...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

Is there a book (perhaps the AA Big Book or an Al-Anon book) that walks you through the steps one by one? Thank you.

KSwiss · KSwiss

I am really struggling today. This morning when I was sleeping, my AH replied to a text from my sister. We were going out to breakfast together. He acted as me and said I was mad at my sister. It was this whole conversation, she quickly figured out it was him. He woke me up and told me. I told him how wro...

tortuga · tortuga

Dear family, recovery is not perfection, but progress. I know that. But when I'm faaling back into the hurt, as it happens more often lately again, it happens i loose hope as well. I know I chose the right thing, the best way for me to be healthy. and I did a lot of progress and I'm proud of that. But yesterda...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I feel relieved because the post went through. I am having some difficulties w/ money & dealing w/ my sister & the fact that the sale of my parents' house went through. My sis is upset & I am upset because she is upset. I wrote a post that didn't go through that explained in more detail. I can't...

texasgal · texasgal

Lately my soberAH hasn't been coming home until Sunday morning. I'm off on saturday and Sunday this weekend. I know i cant change his actions but I need to find something to do. I only have plans for saturday morning. I plan to go to a meeting but other than that I don't have anything. I don't want to be coop...

scaredandconfused · scaredandconfused

Maybe it is because our anniversary is coming up but I have been doing a lot of looking back on my relationship with my hopefully stbxah. If only I could get him to sign those divorce papers. The question I keep coming back to is "What was I thinking? Why did I put up with this insanity and disrespect f...

11lks11 · 11lks11

I'm living with my boyfriend, a recovering alcoholic 3 months sober. Things have improved there is no doubt. The fact that he's not drinking is amazing. I know I'm to support his recovery & that is his focus...that it needs to be. But he is an unemotional robot. He doesn't want to talk about an...

teachmath · teachmath

I'm back! I have been dating a sober alcoholic for nearly 16 months and his sobriety started just about two months before we met. Things were definitely getting better for our relationship and for him. He has a great job, a nice place to live and gets to at least 3-5 meetings a week. As always, I helpe...

PP · PP

After reading some of the posts this morning I began pondering co-dependency. The meaning of it and how it shows up in my life is still unfoldingfor today, I see that it has given me a false sense of power over people and my life. I looked for power from ineffective sources. I thought I had power when som...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning everyone: I took the ultimate plunge and completely let go. As you might know I'm a big enabler and almost 5 months ago I stop. I stop all but one little detail. His phone.... I thought he HAD to have comunication with the outside world but today I have a change of heart. He sold his ca...

blondie99 · blondie99

Was feeling a bit down in the dumps this morning - knew I had a lot to do around the house that my STBXAH left unfinished before he went to rehab - and now will never do since he chose to move in with his mistress. So I went and picked up dog messes, gave the grass and trees a good soaking, and, all by my darn self,...

Heather 68 · Heather 68

The next chapter of the saga continues. My ex ABF has been silent lately, no calls, thought that would be good. Well I can not keep my heart in check, I miss him, I hurt a lot, cry off and on all day, cant sleep or focus. I go back to "how could the next drink be more important than me"? Despite the ch...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Well the car is sold, rent is paid until June, got all his stuff out of the pawn shop, looking for a beater car and got a job that starts April 8. Sounds great. Took me out to dinner last night an paid...he was very excited and also sad about losing the car...but oh well he says. Talking up a storm and havi...

Path to Serenity · Path to Serenity

If anyone has any experience with the Smart Recovery Program (alternative to AA) please share. My son is leaning toward this group instead of AA - I have no intention to intervene in his decision but I would like to educate myself a little. TIA Path

texasgal · texasgal

I knew my AH wasn't going to come home so last night after work I went to video store rented some movies and came home to relax. Wouldnt u know it just as I'm at the end of movie my AH comes in the door. I just sat and continued with my movie and fell asleep. Today I'm going to a meeting in an hour and then idk. My co...

Cheri_Swanson · Cheri_Swanson

Again, I am questioning myself, am I being unreasonable, or is it that I am letting him manipulate me again? My husband says he is not an alcoholic if he drinks four to six beers a night. I say he is because he is only happy when he is drinking. I also tell him that the reason he won't eat dinner until later...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Dear Friends I am leaving shortly for my f2f meeting. AH is also going to an AA meeting this morning, so this Saturday is better than last. I've said the Serenity Prayer a million times this past week. That, and reading all of your posts have been my lifeline this week. In 10 days AH has his trial dat...

lnc12 · lnc12

My AH stayed sober for one month, but now he is drinking again. Bad. He has been staying with his grandmother for about 5 months, and I have been at my parents since August. Wednesday morning, everything seemed to be going ok. I went over to see him, we talked and laughed, and it was wonderful. Around 1:00...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

Tradition 5 says we work the same steps the alcoholic works. So I guess that means ill be going through AAs Big Book. I allowed myself to be guided thru that work and one thing that happened was I was taught how to identify what's really going inside of me immediately and how to get rid of it and even USE it t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	still searching for snswers (Preview) so far ive come to realize that withh all my childhood abuse has effected my relationships with men but im not so sure how its effected my relationships with men or boyfreinds yet i hope i dont fall into denial with this,i dont know how it may have effected my relationships with my siblings since all of my...	chinup	3	247	Mar 22, 2013 by chinup
	Happiness is in the eye of the beholder (Preview) I was talking to a dear friend who ran into my STBXAH a couple days ago. She said that he was saying "I'm so happy, everything's going so well, I'm doing this and this and this and (Blondie) and I have agreed to be friends even after the divorce." Yeah, right. Pink cloud time - I've seen and heard...	blondie99	2	209	Mar 22, 2013 by Pushka
	F2F Meeting (Preview) I posted a few weeks ago about detaching from my ABF. Tonight I was on my way out the door to my 2nd F2F meeting. On the way out he asked if I would pick up some AA pamphlets for him. My first thought was "sure", but as I was driving to the meeting, I started wondering if I should. I mean, if he wa...	cRaZyJaDe	2	293	Mar 22, 2013 by PP
	Great Topic at My Meeting Last Night (Preview) The topic leader last night shared the March 12th reading from "Hope for Today." It was all about focusing on the positives in life and even jotting a positive word on a daily calendar. I hadn't been to a meeting in a couple of weeks and was worried that I might have a meltdown if the sharing at t...	Green Eyes	3	342	Mar 22, 2013 by Pushka
	punishment! (Preview) I was just talking to someone yesterday, and said I could never make out I was ill to claim for benifits because I would not like to cry wolf and be punished for it!, They replied that makes me think of your relationship with your husband? and went on to say is that how I see life? He said that at our age we'r...	Katy	7	476	Mar 21, 2013 by beckon11
	Should I keep my sponsor? (Preview) Hello, This is my first time on these boards. I have been in Alanon now for 90 days and have had a sponsor since day 1. She at first was very attentive towards me, very encouraging, helpful and motivating. She would say how I am so similar to her and almost like I was her favorite of all her sponsee's. We...	sunflower22	9	770	Mar 21, 2013 by sunflower22
	Need some ESH on not accepting unacceptable behavior (Preview) I've been trying to straighten this all out in my head lately, as I come closer and closer to the end of my rope with my AH. I do still struggle with accepting that his addiction/drinking is his business, although I've gotten much better at accepting that. But then we have the whole universe of "un...	stephaniej	7	529	Mar 21, 2013 by stephaniej
	AW is drinking and strangely I feel relief (Preview) It's almost as if the waiting is finally over and I can feel comfortable again. She hadn't drank for over two weeks and now finally I can relax and not have all that terrible hope hanging over my head. She is a mean angry drunk even moreso than usual due to us already at odds with one another... but she is s...	dponlyme	6	361	Mar 21, 2013 by pinkchip
	THURSDAY (Preview) -- Edited by mercedes1959 on Thursday 21st of March 2013 12:54:17 PM	mercedes1959	0	429	Mar 21, 2013 by mercedes1959
	abandonment issues (Preview) Hi friends, Wondering if any of you have abandonment issues,and pain. I have done so much work on this.Yet it still can really pull me down. Im doing work again on the inner child. Would love to hear from anyone who has experienced this. I know alanon helps alot also. thx beckon11	beckon11	2	748	Mar 21, 2013 by beckon11
	My Helping Hand... (Preview) Have ya Ever Stepped Down off your Ego Button and had an 'Auh..Hah... Moment' Resently I have been having some "Stinkin thinkin's" going on within my Head, and I have been Reading the Lit, and Doing Alot of differant tools that i Learned to Really get to the surface of it! Well when I Sat Down a...	Jozie	2	430	Mar 21, 2013 by beckon11
	Next ..... (Preview) Hello All, next chapter of my saga....my ex AB has sent me a few texts trying to stab at I me, I respond with messages of my positive recovery and courage to change my situation. That shuts him up for a day or so, but I finally blocked him from contacting me...again. My last "I love you" but this i...	Heather 68	2	207	Mar 21, 2013 by dponlyme
	Trial Date is coming (Preview) I've been so worried and anxious about this court date that AH and I have on March 27. He keeps referring to it as "me vs him" and today I reminded him that it is not me vs him, it is the State vs him. I received my subpoena the other day, which clearly states this. He still thinks he will waltz in fr...	ParisMemories	6	342	Mar 21, 2013 by ParisMemories
	"I can control my drinking" (Preview) I am really confused. The alcoholic in my life is my boyfriend and we have been through so many " episodes " of his drinking causing complete chaos, weekly, bi weekly.. like you would get your mail or visit the gym. He has embarassed himself in front of me because of the amount of blacking out...	giraffe13	15	632	Mar 20, 2013 by Heather 68
	Hmmmm.. Progress? (Preview) First of all, I want to thank everyone here for being so kind and accepting! Oh, and most of all encouraging! It's just so great knowing that I can come on here, vent my hurts and frustrations, and I won't be judged. After almost 7 months of separation from my AH, I did something shocking this morning. I r...	lnc12	8	232	Mar 20, 2013 by Heather 68
	Boundrys... Tough, Yet Worth It! (Preview) Welp Peeps... After Some Much Needed Work on ME! I have Found that I Can No Longer Allow "Pity Pot" time for My Woo's... This Last Week has been a Roller Coaster of Emotions for me, and Frankly I'm just Sick to Death of Allowing it time of My Thoughts, & My Actions... I Have Found that when I S...	Jozie	3	276	Mar 20, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	I will not be destroyed (Preview) So, as the divorce is progressing and people are starting to find out about what has happened between my STBXAH and me, I have been receiving information on happenings that have occurred, unknowingly to me, over the last several years. The most interesting thing I've heard so far is that both my mom an...	blondie99	3	393	Mar 20, 2013 by Jerry F
	De-lurking: thank you all so much! (Preview) I have been getting so much out of this board, in lurker-mode, for the past few months. I 'tried' Al-Anon 11 years ago right as my 13 year marriage to my then alcoholic husband was ending. I didn't go back to the meetings at that time . The first meeting I went to had about 30 people in it, which was terrifyin...	ClearTheFog	4	373	Mar 20, 2013 by Jerry F
	Recent thinkings (Preview) I want to post about three things, but I dont want to post three times my creative side wants to tie them in together lets see if I can manage it eh? #1 I love second hand stores and when I get a few minutes/half a morning, I go to town for just that, to browse through my favorites before getting groceries, lun...	likemyheart	6	245	Mar 20, 2013 by Sweet Stanley
	Good Morning Everyone! (Preview) I read your post here, and I hear you, I feel you. We are not that different when it comes to the feelings associated with loving an alcoholic or addict. We hurt, we guess, we question, we wonder, we fear, we give up trying, and then try harder, we attach and then detach, we hold on with all our might, and the...	John	11	551	Mar 20, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	A great assembly- and thanks.... (Preview) Hi y'all... I came into this forum last year after going through the Alanon Traditions on this MIP board. i was so impressed. I learned stuff through interacting with the fine people doing this task. At this end of the world keeping Alanon going does take a lot of patience and I feel we need all the help we...	DavidG	6	219	Mar 20, 2013 by david62
	Mourning my marriage (Preview) I feel like I am in a new stage of grief. I kind of think its a new phase of acceptance. This process sure has been a whirlwind ride of emotions. Most of the time I am doing pretty good and most days I am enjoying my life. I am lonely at times, miss having a partner in my life, someone to hang out with, share s...	cinders	8	475	Mar 20, 2013 by John
	Ever feel like giving up? throwing in the towel? Saying this is WAY to much to handle? (Preview) I am so overwhelmed dealing with his last fall off the wagon. He had a huge pain pill problem the last three years. His Dr just gave him more and more then he started buying them when he ran out. It was terrible. We have kids and a mixed family (step kids and shared kids). I feel responsible for holding i...	Rinn	6	408	Mar 20, 2013 by Rinn
	He says I'm crazy (Preview) Hi I'm new to the board and I originally posted this in response to another post, but I'm reposting because I think I should have started a new thread. Much of what I've read here really resonates with me. I too have had my spouse email back a friend and insult them. I too am blamed for everything that goes w...	forestfairy	7	464	Mar 20, 2013 by giraffe13
	Max - Playing with my other dogs (Preview) Just wanted to let you folks see what your prayers brought about. Max is doing very well, and playing hard and living large. In the beginning of this very short video you can see Lilly Girl tap on Max a few times with her paw..."C'on, play.. its only 2am!" And the fun beguns between them. Thank each an...	John	3	236	Mar 19, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Newbie/need to vent (Preview) Hi Im quite new to all of this so please forgive me if I rant a bit. First off I did make the step of going to my first meeting last Friday it felt strange but I was made to feel welcome.It was strange in that I was talking to complete strangers about how my AW problem was affecting me.I do want to go back this wee...	gorby928	9	400	Mar 19, 2013 by gorby928
	Rigorous Honesty (Today's al-anon meeting) (Preview) Tonight my al-anon group discussed rigorous honesty. With ourselves. I really have to say that in relating to this disease, my rigorous honesty lately has been with myself over the last month accepting that my boyfriend is not changing or working on sobriety. At all. All I can do is change myself. As h...	giraffe13	4	826	Mar 19, 2013 by canadianguy
	looking for an online Alanon sponsor (Preview) Hello! I am looking for an online Alanon sponsor to do my steps with. Since I am residing currently in the country where there are no active Alanon meetings available, online meetings would be my only source, Skype chats possible with sponsor. I have separated from my abusive AH but having tough t...	pinnu	3	315	Mar 19, 2013 by mammapepper
	Struggling - My husband just admitted he is an alcoholic (Preview) 4 days ago my husband admitted to me and his family that he is an alcoholic. He has started AA meetings and is trying to foucs on getting himself help. The thing I am struggling with is that he has asked that we do not speak or see each other for a month as he needs to foucs on himself and can not worry about...	tania31	5	738	Mar 19, 2013 by mammapepper
	HELP? (Preview) HI This is the first time I have ever spoken to anyone about this Im not sure what to do anymore or how to manage whats going on. My husband has been an alcoholic for around 8years he had a period of around a year when he didnt drink at all, then a few days after xmas we lost our home and have had to move in with a f...	fruitbat	5	250	Mar 19, 2013 by PP
	lost and dont know where to turn (Preview) what and where do or does one go to or do when you just come to reality of that youve been a victim of child moletation-age 5 several times,child molestation one time age 8 and drugged and raped by a gang age 14.and its now been 40 yrs since this has all happened but just now realizeing it,and done been to the...	chinup	5	428	Mar 19, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Sounds familiar.. (Preview) I was reading the upto date posts just now. How familiar. I haven't been on here in a while as I THOUGHT I was coping with partner's drinking. I am not today. In fact I've cried and cried all day and I'm hurting so much inside. I feel dismal and worthless. Since I last posted, he has made a conscious eff...	Cherubhmm	8	288	Mar 19, 2013 by Cherubhmm
	lonely (Preview) I worked an early shift and im outside parked I dont want to get off cuz their isnt anyone to greet me or even care if im home. I texted a friend but they haven't texted back yet. I even called my AH but he has his phone off. I hate the feelings that I have right now. I want to be part of something but im not. We dont...	texasgal	5	348	Mar 19, 2013 by beckon11
	Abusive mother/loss of best friend/greif and painI (Preview) Hi every one.So glad to have found you.I feel so alone!! Dealing with a abusive dry alcoholic mother.Who knows every hurt game there is.Also my best girlfriend just ended our friendship/with no closure at all. I really thought I could trust her.She just acts like she never knew me.Kind of fami...	beckon11	3	340	Mar 19, 2013 by beckon11
	I am married to a recovering alcoholic who may need more help spouse recovering alcoholic dry relapse (Preview) This seems like such a wonderful group. I have very little experience with Al-Anon but I am married to someone who did the 12 steps before I met him. I love him very much. We are going to have our first baby any day now-- a son. However, I think he needs some help. For the past year or more, I keep having the s...	lmyya	6	5966	Mar 19, 2013 by Jerry F
	today has been a long day (Preview) I had a pleasant Saturday and AH did not come home but this morning at 5am my AH text me that he hated his life and he wanted to die. He hadn't said anything like that since he used to drink. One time he took out the shot gun and tried to do it when he was very drunk. I didn't take it lightly and I texted with him for...	texasgal	2	1781	Mar 19, 2013 by Jerry F
	Got a sponsor!!!! (Preview) I see the light at the end of the tunnel, it may be far far away but i see it! After about 2 months of a lot of meetings and throwing myself in to the literature i was ready and comfortable enough to ask for more help. I have found a wonderful sponsor from my home meeting, I am overjoyed. I cried when she agreed,...	Heather 68	9	334	Mar 19, 2013 by giraffe13
	I want to contact my Son (Preview) Hi everyone.... Had a relaxing day just playing on the computer and watching TV. My son now has a whole lot of money and on the biggest binge of his life. I can't seem to get it out of my mind and don't even want to talk to him at all if he calls me. My choice right? I will pray to my HP that he makes it thoug...	Cathyinaz	13	557	Mar 19, 2013 by Auntyaya
	Terrible fights and hurt feelings (Preview) AW has been on the wagon for a couple weeks now and we are having terrible fights. She says I am treating her like she is stupid but my intention is just to let her know that I disagree with her. She seems so hypersensitive to me. I for my part get upset because she gets upset with me when I feel I have done nothi...	dponlyme	11	534	Mar 19, 2013 by Jerry F
	Monday morning meeting (Preview) The topic is posted here http://meetinginfo.activeboard.com/	mercedes1959	0	140	Mar 18, 2013 by mercedes1959
	"The Secret" (Preview) Dear Friends, Last night, I couldn't sleep, (worrying about AH, legal issues, bills....etc.) so I opened up Netflix on my computer and began to browse titles suggested for me. I saw "The Secret" and remembered that someone had mentioned that in a recent F2F meeting. I gave it a try. Wow, wh...	ParisMemories	1	562	Mar 18, 2013 by Aloha
	A written copy of The 12 steps? (Preview) Is there a book (perhaps the AA Big Book or an Al-Anon book) that walks you through the steps one by one? Thank you.	phoenixmagicgirl	5	772	Mar 18, 2013 by Path to Serenity
	How to deal with mental abuse (Preview) I am really struggling today. This morning when I was sleeping, my AH replied to a text from my sister. We were going out to breakfast together. He acted as me and said I was mad at my sister. It was this whole conversation, she quickly figured out it was him. He woke me up and told me. I told him how wro...	KSwiss	5	526	Mar 18, 2013 by giraffe13
	need a hug...in the loop! (Preview) Dear family, recovery is not perfection, but progress. I know that. But when I'm faaling back into the hurt, as it happens more often lately again, it happens i loose hope as well. I know I chose the right thing, the best way for me to be healthy. and I did a lot of progress and I'm proud of that. But yesterda...	tortuga	8	302	Mar 18, 2013 by forestfairy
	the post went through (Preview) I feel relieved because the post went through. I am having some difficulties w/ money & dealing w/ my sister & the fact that the sale of my parents' house went through. My sis is upset & I am upset because she is upset. I wrote a post that didn't go through that explained in more detail. I can't...	Hoot Nanny	2	250	Mar 17, 2013 by Jen
	the weekend is here :( (Preview) Lately my soberAH hasn't been coming home until Sunday morning. I'm off on saturday and Sunday this weekend. I know i cant change his actions but I need to find something to do. I only have plans for saturday morning. I plan to go to a meeting but other than that I don't have anything. I don't want to be coop...	texasgal	8	401	Mar 17, 2013 by forestfairy
	What was I thinking? (Preview) Maybe it is because our anniversary is coming up but I have been doing a lot of looking back on my relationship with my hopefully stbxah. If only I could get him to sign those divorce papers. The question I keep coming back to is "What was I thinking? Why did I put up with this insanity and disrespect f...	scaredandconfused	4	379	Mar 17, 2013 by likemyheart
	3 months sober ...things are better....yet worse??? (Preview) I'm living with my boyfriend, a recovering alcoholic 3 months sober. Things have improved there is no doubt. The fact that he's not drinking is amazing. I know I'm to support his recovery & that is his focus...that it needs to be. But he is an unemotional robot. He doesn't want to talk about an...	11lks11	5	469	Mar 17, 2013 by hotrod
	His life is complicated and I am drowing in my own problems (Preview) I'm back! I have been dating a sober alcoholic for nearly 16 months and his sobriety started just about two months before we met. Things were definitely getting better for our relationship and for him. He has a great job, a nice place to live and gets to at least 3-5 meetings a week. As always, I helpe...	teachmath	19	681	Mar 17, 2013 by likemyheart
	Co-Dependency and Power (Preview) After reading some of the posts this morning I began pondering co-dependency. The meaning of it and how it shows up in my life is still unfoldingfor today, I see that it has given me a false sense of power over people and my life. I looked for power from ineffective sources. I thought I had power when som...	PP	10	351	Mar 17, 2013 by Theoceancalls
	Have I done the right thing (Preview) Good Morning everyone: I took the ultimate plunge and completely let go. As you might know I'm a big enabler and almost 5 months ago I stop. I stop all but one little detail. His phone.... I thought he HAD to have comunication with the outside world but today I have a change of heart. He sold his ca...	Cathyinaz	16	367	Mar 17, 2013 by AngelicH57
	Did it my darn self! (Preview) Was feeling a bit down in the dumps this morning - knew I had a lot to do around the house that my STBXAH left unfinished before he went to rehab - and now will never do since he chose to move in with his mistress. So I went and picked up dog messes, gave the grass and trees a good soaking, and, all by my darn self,...	blondie99	5	270	Mar 17, 2013 by tortuga
	In a lot of pain! (Preview) The next chapter of the saga continues. My ex ABF has been silent lately, no calls, thought that would be good. Well I can not keep my heart in check, I miss him, I hurt a lot, cry off and on all day, cant sleep or focus. I go back to "how could the next drink be more important than me"? Despite the ch...	Heather 68	8	476	Mar 17, 2013 by Heather 68
	OH WELL I'm OK (Preview) Well the car is sold, rent is paid until June, got all his stuff out of the pawn shop, looking for a beater car and got a job that starts April 8. Sounds great. Took me out to dinner last night an paid...he was very excited and also sad about losing the car...but oh well he says. Talking up a storm and havi...	Cathyinaz	7	355	Mar 16, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	SMART Recovery Program (Preview) If anyone has any experience with the Smart Recovery Program (alternative to AA) please share. My son is leaning toward this group instead of AA - I have no intention to intervene in his decision but I would like to educate myself a little. TIA Path	Path to Serenity	12	578	Mar 16, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	feeling better today (Preview) I knew my AH wasn't going to come home so last night after work I went to video store rented some movies and came home to relax. Wouldnt u know it just as I'm at the end of movie my AH comes in the door. I just sat and continued with my movie and fell asleep. Today I'm going to a meeting in an hour and then idk. My co...	texasgal	2	237	Mar 16, 2013 by texasgal
	He says he is not alcoholic.... (Preview) Again, I am questioning myself, am I being unreasonable, or is it that I am letting him manipulate me again? My husband says he is not an alcoholic if he drinks four to six beers a night. I say he is because he is only happy when he is drinking. I also tell him that the reason he won't eat dinner until later...	Cheri_Swanson	9	477	Mar 16, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Good morning (Preview) Dear Friends I am leaving shortly for my f2f meeting. AH is also going to an AA meeting this morning, so this Saturday is better than last. I've said the Serenity Prayer a million times this past week. That, and reading all of your posts have been my lifeline this week. In 10 days AH has his trial dat...	ParisMemories	1	224	Mar 16, 2013 by AngieP
	Update (Preview) My AH stayed sober for one month, but now he is drinking again. Bad. He has been staying with his grandmother for about 5 months, and I have been at my parents since August. Wednesday morning, everything seemed to be going ok. I went over to see him, we talked and laughed, and it was wonderful. Around 1:00...	lnc12	4	216	Mar 16, 2013 by Jerry F
	I feel so good!! (Preview) Tradition 5 says we work the same steps the alcoholic works. So I guess that means ill be going through AAs Big Book. I allowed myself to be guided thru that work and one thing that happened was I was taught how to identify what's really going inside of me immediately and how to get rid of it and even USE it t...	WorkingThroughIt	2	217	Mar 16, 2013 by tortuga
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.