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Life is for learning
(Preview)
Thank you all who responded to my last post. You get where I am at this point. I am aware that my A is in recovery for me. She has stopped drinking and is trying a food plan. She has lost a couple pounds. My hope is that if she keeps going to meetings and talking to her sponsor, it is possible that somethin...
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Lyne
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2
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224
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Son sent me an email
(Preview)
I had an email from my son this morning. He wrote that he's doing fine and hoped my job interview went well. That was it. Nothing about paying me back the money I loaned him as he promised he would. I don't necessarily believe that he's doing well as he tends to say this so I won't worry. I know there isn't any...
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Rose50
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10
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553
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Emotionally unavailable
(Preview)
I have asked to be sat next to many times. I ask - and leave the results to God. My husband continues to be emotionally unavailable and selfish at times, and I take care of me anyway. Tonight - we had the kids off to Grandma and Grandpa's for a night of camping. Most of the day was spent picking up my siste...
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Tasha
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8
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521
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i slipped up. . .
(Preview)
so, after months of working really hard on myself and detaching from my ah, i lost it tonight. since last friday my husb has been out drinking four out of seven nites and useless on the other three. so tonight whn he annc once again he wouldnt be home, i cried. i feel lousy as work has been tough and im gettin...
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Theoceancalls
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6
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381
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Boundaries. How do you get them?
(Preview)
I tend to cave under pressure and do that "go along to get along" thing with usually disasterous results. How do you fix that? How do you get strong, good boundaries where you can say what you want to say without being scared? I know that I did that with my boyfriend. He is actually pissed at me...
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bijela
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4
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656
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Why do we blame ourselves for everything?
(Preview)
I always feel like every problem in relationships are my fault. I feel terribly guilty for moving out of my boyfriend's house. He lives there with his sister and they are both drinkers. His sister is a mean drunk and has attacked me a few times. When I packed up my stuff and left, he was sobbing. I felt so ho...
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bijela
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8
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690
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something small that opens up a revelation about myself
(Preview)
So, my A slept almost all day today, and I was trying to figure out why it bothered me so much. He wasn't drunk, hasn't had a drop all day to my knowledge, he's just been sleeping. Why on earth would I be annoyed that he was asleep? I've had lazy days when I just veg'd out in front of the stupid box all day, wh...
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SpiderArcana
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5
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344
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cruise went well...
(Preview)
The cruise went well. It rained but didn't really affect the outcome. I am just grateful that about 100 recovering people were there anyway. I was informed that I couldn't even mention anything about it on any form of public media. I thought I could casually mention it but I can't even post a picture tha...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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322
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FAITH
(Preview)
Hi All, lost my conection with my HP for a day or two, I forgot he had my back. and guess what my sponsee rang aand what I needed to suggest was TRUST IN HP 1st sign. Then I went to my meeting this morning and the topic was FAITH 2nd sign. So praying contecting trusting all will be fine HP can see round corners. ...
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Tracy
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2
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238
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I don't think I'm moving forward
(Preview)
Why I say I'm not moving forward like I should is because I realize just this hour that I think something happened......and IT"S CRAZY My son has been sending a email every day telling me about his progress. He has a one hour privilege for internet by his counselor. Today he didn't email and I am...
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Cathyinaz
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17
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557
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life
(Preview)
I miss this board and will write as often as I can. Today I have some extra time and am checking in with you guys before getting lost in the day. I have been through some ups and downs lately-90 yr old mother not doing well, car accident (I'm fine as HP was in my passenger seat), work stress, home construct...
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Lyne
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4
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377
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Acceptance is the key to serenity
(Preview)
Hi everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. Ever since coming to Al-Anon, I find I have been more accepting of life. Accepting of myself, accepting of my feelings, accepting of situations around me that are out of my control. I used to try and convince myself and pretend tha...
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slogan_jim
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3
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586
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Dealing with so much sadness
(Preview)
I have known my boyfriend since middle school. We were friends thoughout the years. We hit it off more recently and became a couple. I should have known better not to fall in love and pursue a relationship with him. Both of us were of the grunge band stoner crew back in the day. I had problems with pills a...
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bijela
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5
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6804
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5 steps in recovery: story of falling into a hole.
(Preview)
Step 1: I walk on a pathway, and I stumble over and fall into a hole in front of me i didn't see. I fall inside, and due to my deep wounds, i die inside, impossible to get out, helpless, not able to scream for help. Step 2: I walk on a pathway, I fall into a hole in front of me, as I'm down there I curse the world a...
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tortuga
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4
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1138
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Trouble detaching
(Preview)
I've been away for awhile, trying to get everything straight. My alcoholic husband quit drinking for several months, we bought our first house, and have been working on renovations. I also went to therapy to help with my co-dependency issues. Things were going ok. I found a bottle the other day. ...
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SpiderArcana
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5
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436
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Going to see a therapist for the first time in 4 years
(Preview)
scaredSo after much deliberation I've decided to go see a therapist again to deal with my AM's drinking and to gain more self confidence (the two not being related). The last time I did this was 5 years ago when I was in college in upstate PA..I dealt with my issues regarding AB ( who was drinking at the tim...
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phoenixmagicgirl
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6
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304
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I was told I was a double winner
(Preview)
Oh boy !! Some ppl told me I was a double winner I was like what's . They said you have brains and beauty use them!! I noticed I do a lot of my powerful positive posting when I'm in the cemetery . When I'm lost the cemetery is where I walk to find myself and clear my head. I think what I love the most about the cemet...
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Ms co-dependent
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8
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480
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Lost
(Preview)
My husband left me telling me that every time he looks at me he wants to hurt me (mentally he has never physically hurt me). He said he finally realized that everything I have told him over the last few months like leaving the room when I walk in, belittling me and false accusations he was intentionally do...
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mongowal
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8
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489
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Alanon Step 2
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t55156986/alnon-step-2/
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hotrod
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0
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453
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just needing to connect
(Preview)
so, i havent been on the boards lately to post, but ive been reading. so much of what we post and share out speaks volumes as to the depth this disease can go to do harm. ive returned back to work after the summer break onky to be crazy busy and tired and yes, raising a child and living with an active alcoholic...
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Theoceancalls
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3
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351
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Serenity Moment
(Preview)
My quick must share beautiful moment son had regarding serenity having been an alcoholic and an addict for nearly half of his life he finally made it to rehab nearly two years ago now and is studying to be a counselor, kid you not well he finally got a job in a rehab while he finishes his sc...
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Peggy7
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6
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390
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Well HELLOOO Detachment and ZERO expectations, I am SO glad U R here!!!!!!
(Preview)
gotta Laugh at this one......Cousin arrived in town Tues......Haven't heard from her until todayshe slept all day Wed....Understandable....tiredyesterday she checked up on her rental house in my town....tenents are leaving and behind on rent.....understandable, I would want to be on top of t...
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neshema2
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8
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549
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STEP 7....CLEANSE me of these unwanted feelings PLEASE!!!
(Preview)
Well this past 2 nights I have been working step 7.......asking creator, Great Spirit to remove this awful defect of mine called ill will, resentment and anger towards a LIST of folksI have been angry at Creator for not helping me meet my needs better.....even tho I believe creator only works in the sp...
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neshema2
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10
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444
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letting go...
(Preview)
Recently my sister-in-law lost her mother. I really don't know what to say to her or my brother. It is awful to not be there & help her through this. She is such a sweet soul. Her mom was a gem. I am stuck in shock even though we knew this was coming. Her mom has been sick & in the hospital numerous time...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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183
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The Awakening
(Preview)
A time comes in your life when you finally get it... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your...
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Peggy7
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7
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549
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Loving at a distance
(Preview)
I have to say that I really like the advantages of that. I just included my brother in a response to someone's post and vallah after three months of not hearing a peep from him, he texts me bright and early this morning shortly after I posted here. I'm sad at the condition of our relationship but glad to...
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tiredtonite
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5
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522
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Service...
(Preview)
Just recently got home from introducing the program to the families of clients of a local rehab and of course to the counseling staff. My partner in it is a member who has recent time and the willingness to grow and experience as a teacher. If you have never ever intoduced the program to a whole bunch...
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Jerry F
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4
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234
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Posted a question 3-days ago and here is my follow-up, am I right
(Preview)
I received many nice responses from my post and left my last statement that I was going to support my wife in any decision she decides to follow. Well I have. I retuned to aa to continue the 12-steps program, have come to some peace with my self in supporting my wife's recovery that will continue in anoth...
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gofred123
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7
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765
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You'll never be alone
(Preview)
When you walk through a storm hold your head up high And don't be afraid of the dark. At the end of a storm is a golden sky And the sweet silver song of a lark. Walk on through the wind, Walk on through the rain, Tho' your dreams be tossed and blown. Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart And you'll nev...
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Mari1978
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4
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472
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Good Morning
(Preview)
I want to start by saying I am grateful for MIP being here for me For some reason I have no ESH for myself or anyone else right now. I'm like frozen in time. I'm not sad but I'm not happy. Not sure if it's fear or worry. I'm just not myself. I think about what is going on and I do think it might be because I w...
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Cathyinaz
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6
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363
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DID I HANDLE THIS RIGHT ?? re: my adult daughter
(Preview)
Ive been praying about my daughter (23yrs old) being attracted to the same alcoholic/addict type ppl I have all my yrs... Her dad (my ex ) is a A and my current husband is a A. Im stepping back and trying to let her learn for own self. Shes def is learning the hard way. And Her grandma spoke with me about us be...
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sweeetr
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6
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522
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C2C
(Preview)
Courage to Change has been a helpful part of my recovery. I have a really bad memory but I know today's reading is a good one. I will probably read it again because I tend to forget almost every thing I read that can be important. Sometimes I would rather read light reading because I am in the moment & do...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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378
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a sign of codependence...
(Preview)
You know you are codependent when you feel guilty driving by a hitchhiker. ..
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rehprof
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9
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397
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GAl (Guardian ad Litem) lack of Chemical Dependency Knowledge and Self Assessed Alcohol Evaluation
(Preview)
I have been with my husband for over 8 years. When I finally agreed to marry him it was truly because I was pregnant. We are from a small town and the Lord forbid if we weren't married or if he was going to have a child born based on the help of the system. Things were really great for the duration of the pre...
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abusedwife
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4
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437
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the key to serenity is focus...
(Preview)
.... or so I am thinking right now. that's the deep source of most of my issues with life. The A is just one trigger that pushed this to the limit and this pointed it out to me. But the problem is mine I have to admit. FOCUS. what a small word with such big importance. What brought since i can remember diffic...
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tortuga
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5
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372
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So .. Angry God ? tired tonight ..
(Preview)
Just am lonely tonight. Doesn't matter who I'm around yet as I type this I realize right now that with other alanon members, the lonliness is much more bearable .. Had an epiphany though and recognizing this is truly part of my own personal acceptance process .. darkest before dawn as usual .. Would li...
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MeTwo2
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9
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409
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A good breakthrough in boundaries and detachment
(Preview)
Daughter #2 tried me AGAIN!!! ....I told you all about the "dinner" she stood me up on about 2-3 weeks ago and didn't even apologize for it and that it was something she INSISTED upon....a "mom and daughter dinner" HER idea...And she pulled the head games on me again, ...and h...
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neshema2
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8
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368
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Sober or not, he says I'm never satisfied.
(Preview)
My BF is an alcoholic/addict. Right now he is using but had a 5 month sober period. He says I'm never happy, even when he was sober he says I was never satisfied. Is this uncommon? I feel as though he may be right....he is drinking and using I'm enraged. If he is sober then I always figure he will mess it up any...
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Heronbeach
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24
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813
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Hey
(Preview)
Im a 23 yr old singe mom who grew up with an alcoholic for a mother and an absent father. I was put into the CYS at the age of 12 and stayed there till i was 18. My mother passed away 2 years ago in feb and now i am struggling with more issues than i ever had while she was alive. I am now a 23 yr old single mom who is ha...
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lonelygirl101
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2
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262
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Signs and Symptoms of Inner Peace
(Preview)
Be on the lookout for symptoms of inner peace. The hearts of a great many have already been exposed to inner peace and it is possible that people everywhere could come down with it in epidemic proportions. This could pose a serious threat to what has, up to now, been a fairly stable condition of conflict...
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Peggy7
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7
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426
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I just can't wrap my head around it
(Preview)
First thanks for reading as I can't wrap my head around something. Been dating/engaged to a woman on and off for 3 years. She is 44 y/o with Alc and Cocaine Addiction. Been through many treatments. Longest sober is 90 days ( for last 6-7 years). Anyway I have been supporting her, she lived with me till she...
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Baffledinva
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10
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494
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Again.
(Preview)
He never quit drinking, but he cut down a bit or maybe not. I thought I had mastered the step to not nag him about his drinking and I haven't been. Sometimes I cry silently, but say nothing. The problem that I am having a hard time with is his temper. Usually he loses it with me. We use to work as a te...
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dori711
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10
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529
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thank you all MIP family
(Preview)
Hi Everyone: Every once in a while, I take a look at the 'diary' of old posts and private messages since HP directed me hear in 2012. It is helpful for me to see where I was, the journey, where things are at now and through all of it....all of you. I wanted to take a few moments to just express gratitude for a...
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yanksfan51
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10
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433
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Dating in the fellowhip
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of the worldwide fellowship of al-anon. There is a young lady that I have befriended in the fellowship that I have began to take an interest in. She is the daughter of another member. We've been talking over the last few weeks and I got her phone...
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slogan_jim
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16
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564
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Neshema, in one of your posts you mentioned that John had a posting on boundaries
(Preview)
Where can I find that posting? I am great at setting boundaries but maybe not so good at keeping them. I am wondering if it is a learned skill or if I have the wrong idea of what a boundary is. Thanks.
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deacon
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3
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577
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Regarding violence: Sept. 29th's Courage to Change
(Preview)
I thought it important to bring this day's reading up because more often than not, there are members who are under the circumstances of being faced with physical violence. Today's reading is very poignant and I realize for me it must be taken to heart should I find myself under similar circumstances e...
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Aloha
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5
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278
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FEAR FALSE-EVIDENCE -APPEAR -REAL
(Preview)
This maybe to soon for me thinking. But as most of you know my son (by choice) admitted himself in a Christian Base Recovery House. I am very proud and support him on his sobriety. We talked today and there I am hearing myself say to him " I have fears " well I can hear his fustration because he say...
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Gaby
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6
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525
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Msg from my HP
(Preview)
So lately I have been trying to focus on me. Leave it in HP hands. No snooping, no asking questions just moment to moment. Last night I was carrying my 13 month old around at bedtime and my A gave her his cell phone to play with. She was pressing buttons and up popped a fb msg from A to this girl he had an affair w...
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Mari1978
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7
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428
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Intense situation, brought back feelings
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Very grateful right now. There was just an incident in my building in which a young man got stuck in an elevator. It was a new elevator that was just put in, and it got stuck. I began to hear some ringing of the emergency bell and some ye...
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slogan_jim
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10
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664
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I did something I hadn't done in 5 years
(Preview)
Hi Guys I have been pretty grounded this week. Yes I know because my son is safe in rehab but still I think I'm doing OK. So much OK that I had to stop and get my car serviced with a oil change. While I was waiting I get a text from a friend and she asked if I would stop by for a little while. I usually just go ho...
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Cathyinaz
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11
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495
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esh? work situation
(Preview)
I cross posted this on the other list I'm on so if you see this twice, ignore :) So I have a close friend at work that I trusted, obviously I should not have trusted her..but my higher power puts people in my life to learn a lesson. Long story short, she decided to tell my boss on Friday that I don't do my job wel...
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karma13
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16
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469
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An update on my AM
(Preview)
My AM continues to drink daily. It's an on going battle to sit back and do nothing until she wants to take that 1st Step. I just talked with her and told her how much it hurts us to see her go through this..just existing not really living...how we're here to support her but until she hits her rock bottom and a...
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phoenixmagicgirl
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1
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202
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Getting Used To It
(Preview)
First time posting but long time lurker. I want to thank all the posters here for their shares. It has helped me more than I can say. Last year my husband of 30 years started drinking again after 20, or so, being dry without a program. All the abusive behaviors returned And he started hanging out at th...
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Milehi-tlc
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7
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493
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Son is now 125 days sober
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I have not been on the board for awhile. Retreat week end of July at son's rehab an eye opener. AS is doing good, has returned to his work who paid for rehab (God Bless Them) and enrolled back at the university ( employer pays for that too) and still goes to intensive outpatient 2 nights a week a...
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FAITH1988
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5
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489
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Learning to not react is like sticking me with a hot rod and expecting me not to move or make a sound!
(Preview)
Okay so received a text from my alcoholic mother saying 'I'm going to bed now to have a stroke, thanks daughter'.... I had a panic attack & it upset me so much.. & next day i received another text 'If i'm to come to Cornwall I have to come tomorrow, because i have to be back'. I told her i was upset abo...
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qwerty49
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8
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671
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Jealousy and envy
(Preview)
Had an awareness as to what some of my problem was last week. I wasn't feeling right with meetings because my focus got off track. It's so wonderful to have this program because I learn so much more awareness of my own issues and where things stem from, where my unhappiness comes from, and now I'm learn...
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ilovedogs
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14
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950
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it's only a matter of time `
(Preview)
You know when it's been quiet, And you are lulled into a false sense of "maybe this isn't so bad", something's gonna hit the fan. So here's last night. I stay in the den at night, have become quite content to be by myself, comfy and cozy. With a kitty or two. On the laptop or watching TV. Th...
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islandtime
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8
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435
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Hope is gone...
(Preview)
This past week I was very happy to start back at square one. I truly understand now that I need to focus on myself and my own recovery. The last 2 months have been hell, even worse than all the months leading up to this past July. The reason I feel this way is that I've finally had to swallow the knots in my thro...
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Raven Juniper
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10
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479
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grateful
(Preview)
It's been 4 months now since I have seen my alcoholic ex-bf, that was violent toward me. He remains in jail for abusing me. I am today, so grateful to be free of the insanity. I am now living alone and loving each day and I feel no sense of lonlyiness. Is that normal? I do not feel the need for another relation...
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joker
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5
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334
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A LOVING and AWESOME amend
(Preview)
I had the greatest talk w/my cousin who is my favorite of all relatives....she rates up there , maybe even more than my A brothers whom I love.........She and I grew up together....the respite i got from my hell was at her house w/her parents....we are fraternal cousins and very close in age.... we play...
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neshema2
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4
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383
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