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Hi..
(Preview)
Still getting through my tough times.. But my son is 15 days sober out of his environment. And facing jail time. I am going to as many f2f meetings and even meetings to help me understand the disease. I am just checking in to say. Hi !!
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Gaby
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14
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540
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did anyone see the truck that ran over me?
(Preview)
Now another tooth is going belly up, crown again. not sealed.I am a clean my teeth nut too.that is two now last week. throbbing. took med, strong stuff. Last night I fell again! second time! was trying to see that cat with binoculars, got twisted landed on me bum back and head. AND i yelled ex AH this is YOU...
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Debilyn
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7
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745
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Fall Pictures 2013
(Preview)
I decided to upload some pictures that I have taken this of some of our adventures .. I tend to stay away from personal photos of the kids or myself, while I post those on my FB page .. that is pretty lock down on who can and can't see those. My avatar picture is one that was from a park here close to town .. it r...
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SerenityRUS
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3
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179
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Over-reacting.
(Preview)
Wow. Since I have stopped engaging with ABF or RSVPing to the multiple argument- invitations he sends me each day, I've had a great chance to stand back and watch my own internal reactions to the drama-factory. What triggered me, originally, to reach out for help was my first ever bout of serious pani...
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Melly1248
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21
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586
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help needed- problem with trauma therapist
(Preview)
I could please use some thoughts regarding getting myself unstuck from a situation involving my trauma therapist for treatment of PTSD. I have been receiving therapy when, in September, my health insurance changed and provided much less coverage. I told my therapist and she emphatically said n...
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bud
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23
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546
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All is forgotten?
(Preview)
I'm new - finally got AH to agree to counseling as he finally heard I was done with him. So far he is saying all the right things to counselor and has even been sober a week. He thinks everything is fine now, we can't bring up the past even though he doesn't recall many of things he's done. I hope he has realiz...
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Kerrymom
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7
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360
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I told him I am done
(Preview)
I did it, after listening to his ranting and blaming and all the nonsensical stuff and hearing how I place him on the priority list lower than a pack of sugar I just couldn't do it anymore. I told him I was done. I am a little freaked out but frankly I can't take this anymore anyway being attacked like this co...
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mm830
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26
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790
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That feeling that something just isn't adding up....
(Preview)
Hi everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Growing up in an alcoholic home, I received many inconsistent messages. My parents said one thing but then another happened. They acted one way in certain situations but then another way in other situations that completely con...
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slogan_jim
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12
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500
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I'll take this as a nudge?
(Preview)
I need to think a little before I post this, can someone delete the thread for me as I cannot? Thanks -- Edited by Melly1248 on Monday 20th of January 2014 08:54:31 AM
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Melly1248
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4
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334
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Why am I more scared of this.
(Preview)
Hi.. I am new to everything al anon and right now cannot go to f2f because of babysitting issues. I have been to one in the past. Ah has never attempted sobriety or would even discuss. Also he is of a cultural background where excessive drinking is a norm so to speak.
There is a HUGE sign in his bathroom, i...
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tweety23
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14
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569
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Anxiety
(Preview)
Good Afternoon Everyone I have a whole lot of anxiety right now. Not because of my son but because of my cats. They are crated for the first time to try and retrain them to use the litter box again, to quit marking and get to know each other and not fight anymore. They are howling and trashing their crat...
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Cathyinaz
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32
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1435
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Help: God of my understanding?
(Preview)
I hope this isn't too controversial a question, but I really need some wisdom here: I was wondering if anyone might be interested in sharing stories of how they came to perceive the God of their particular understanding? I have long been interested in spirituality, but my understanding of God has alw...
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dotandthekangaroo
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13
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586
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Doing good things for me in the New Year, please share what you are doing for u
(Preview)
Hi everyone - I have been trying to lose weight this new year. I started with goals that were in five pound increments. I am finding that eating out is not easy and I have to start over a couple of days. I am not beating myself up, just one day at a time. I have also let go of a couple of friends, I am finding more p...
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mercedes1959
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11
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414
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I guess even HE was a blessing to me
(Preview)
I make no bones about how bad living with AH#1 was...He was a huge mistake...Its weird...Both of my fiances adn long term relationships ( I did not want to marry too young, wanted to put me in school and just did not want the trap my A mother was in....and I was afraid of men big time for obvious reasons) Bu...
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neshema2
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12
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415
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Afraid to go to the F2F meeting for the first time
(Preview)
So afraid to go to the first meeting, don't even know where. Afraid that people I know may be there, afraid to be a part of it, afraid to put my face... I don't know what needs to happened for me to attend it..
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Venera
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19
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447
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discovery and acceptance of my character flaws...
(Preview)
Since I have come to Al Anon (2012) and also very little before through therapy, I have come to realize, and still realize, my functioning, my triggers, my flaws. my defects. I have not always been aware of, some have functioned as a habit but now that I realize, i am shocked , yes, disgusted sometimes wi...
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tortuga
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7
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1821
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What am I grateful for????
(Preview)
Today I am Grateful for: My workouts are starting to show in my body , looks and I feel better exercising is making me more mellow my high school girlfriend's health tests came out "ok" I got an old client back and I see it working out very well this time, now I have the work I need I got a good deal...
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neshema2
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11
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359
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Finding a little humor in the put downs
(Preview)
Last night I made the mistake of answering ASO's phone call, somehow I thought it would be him calling to be nice or something...well he called to puke up all his misery on me and blameshift. I have not been reacting as I once did except the little setback a few days ago. He ended up telling me that obviousl...
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mm830
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5
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341
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My AM just lost her life to this horrible disease - words of encouragement needed
(Preview)
Hi friends, I have not been an active poster in the forums but have visited often when I needed to feel a sense of community or hear words of encouragement. I'm back again, and this time unfortunately it's because alcoholism has taken my mother's life. She passed away in a horrible car accident last Mon...
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Daughter
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23
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585
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I'm glad I know I'm insane.
(Preview)
I am a grateful member of Alanon and one of the amazing gifts I have from this fellowship is the ability to be honest with myself and to own up to the defects I have, to a certain extent anyway, Im working on it!!!. Lately, I have felt my insanity surface and I have kind of tuned into it in a weird way and I can se...
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el-cee
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22
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496
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No more Facebook experiment.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Over the years, growing up in an alcoholic home, I had a propensity to compare my life to others. Facebook played a big role in that. The other day I was one and saw a bunch of happy status' and pictures of vacations and couples and car...
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slogan_jim
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17
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515
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From the drama came something new!
(Preview)
I posted a few days ago of the drama that started when my addict son got stranded and wanted me to come "rescue" him, after doing who knows what amount of pills, losing his id (and come to find out his back pack & whatever was in it, as well as having something happen to his face that looked li...
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heythere
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11
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504
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I behave like a hostage in my own home
(Preview)
A light bulb went off in my head this morning. When my ABF is on an angry, drunken bender I act like a hostage. I am a little afraid while he is still awake and I try to be calm and quiet so that I do not 'disturb the beast'. I can finally relax when he passes out. Who would have thought a passed out drunk woul...
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sad_dog_mommy
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15
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683
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PUSH
(Preview)
This is a nice acronym: is that the right word? Pray Until Something Happens! I heard this one at a meeting. Has anyone heard this one before? Let me know what you all think! Kathleen
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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183
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When I feel the most pity
(Preview)
When I feel the most pity for myself, I remember that there is a great wind at that very moment carrying me miraculously across the sky.
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TryingHard2013
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5
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272
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i dare to say, i am a little happy today!
(Preview)
i don't know how, really, but today, i had this moment of letting go. and that gave me an incredible feeling of youth, energy, inspiration and hope. I struggled a lot these last days, because I kind of felt i was forced to let go. A also has become unavailable, as so many times before. I am currently far far...
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tortuga
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7
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395
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Seeing the world with a different set of eyes
(Preview)
From CAS workers who have the experience from dealing with situations such as mine to the officers I met along the way to the angry lady at the court office behind the counter who sputtered she cant give out legal advice (poor woman probably needs a vacation) to the lady who gently guided me to the crow...
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Mari1978
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14
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380
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What does "letting go" mean?
(Preview)
Hello I have been visiting this forum on and off for the last several months. Don't really feel qualified to participate since I am not actively involved in alanon at this time. But found many of the posts relevant to my situation and found that this site seems very safe. My son is an addict and has bee...
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heythere
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18
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2168
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An option for handling sensitive issues that arise on the forum?
(Preview)
Last night there was a posting that was disturbing to me. I watched the responses and I saw the powerful unfolding of the al anon program in action. One of our community was hurt by another from this community and had the courage to bring it to the board for feedback. I was struck by the love and wisdom...
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PP
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34
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968
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To Let Go (Poem)
(Preview)
Letting Go (poem) To let go doesn’t mean to stop caring, it means I can’t do it for someone else. To let go is not to cut myself off, it’s the realization that I can’t control another. To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences. To let go is to admit powerlessness, which mea...
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John
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14
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6718
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This must have come up a few million times before...
(Preview)
OK, so I'm feeling alright in myself. I've turned a lot of corners lately. ABF (sorry, this is largely about his perplexing behaviour and how I relate to him) has been shocking; mean angry tantrums, name calling and blame, rages...over the top drinking...and then later it's all smiles and "I lo...
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Melly1248
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33
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623
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Crazy Thinking
(Preview)
AH and I have been separated for 4 months now. I have been asking AH to make a decision to try to save marriage by going to counseling himself (he has been telling kids and myself that he need to see someone for depression and anxiety) and then him and I go to marriage counseling to resolve our issues (ther...
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mongowal
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8
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260
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Prayers from MIP
(Preview)
Five years ago a member of my family died from this disease. I asked for prayers here. People responded. Even though that was a long time ago, I still am comforted by the power of knowing people prayed for me. So grateful!
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Jill
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6
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248
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Seeing myself
(Preview)
Last night at my F2F meeting, we had two newcomers. They looked scared and in pain and had not a clue what our meeting was going to be like. I saw myself so vividly. My first F2F meeting was at the end of June and I was so scared to be in the room with strangers. I listened to all the shares and when it was my t...
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Lyne
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5
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291
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Thank you all and update
(Preview)
My MIP family: I felt those virtual hugs this morning before leaving for the courthouse; one of my very best friends from my childhood was right there with me (I told her this is the follow up to being my bridesmaid in 1991--haha), and it is surreal, but it's done and I am at least for now, ok! It was a littl...
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yanksfan51
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10
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397
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she's not calling & he is driving me crazy?
(Preview)
What to do? I am sooooooooo powerless these days! My cuz won't call to give me the latest news & my AH is driving me nuts! My husband is bound & determined to make me crazy! He is constantly(still) having me repeat things I say 2 or 3 times. OLD NEWS! & he curses like a sailor. This is a problem be...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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327
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Unexpected good thing happened
(Preview)
Today I got my production report from work. I found out that my production for the past year is much higher than I thought it was. All other aspects of my work performance have been strong. That means I'm doing quite well, certainly better than I'd thought, and my upcoming review will go better than I...
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lmyya
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10
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414
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My mom ..
(Preview)
It must be a full moon (oh it is :)).. I am also asking for prayers for my mom. She has surgery today, .. while the kids and I were out there 2012 my mom did something to her neck and back. I should say she further damaged her neck and back (of course .. LOL .. it's MY fault she got on that rollercoaster, never mi...
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SerenityRUS
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17
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798
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Newcomer feeling extremely alone.
(Preview)
I'm new on here, I was told about the forum from my alcohol worker. She said it may help to talk to people who understand what I've been through/ what I am going through.. Alcohol has always been a major part of my life. My mother is an alcoholic, stepfather too. I started drinking at age 14 just to keep my m...
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MissTee_xo
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15
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576
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My boyfriend is drinking again
(Preview)
Hi, I am new to this and I little nervous to be honest. I have been with my boyfriend now for 2 months but I have known him for about 3 years. He is a recovering alcoholic and has just recently come out of hospital after detox - this is when I started to see him. He has swore that he is going to change (which yes I k...
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Sophie13
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34
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704
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This Is So So Sad
(Preview)
My son is not drinking but doesnt have a program. He has kids and a wife and he is sitting around and barely works, and the food is running low. I have money to get them food, but this sounds like enabling....but I feel sorry for the kids. Wife is looking for work, but hasnt had any luck. ESH please.......og...
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oldergal
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22
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510
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Prayers please
(Preview)
Hi Everyone: I am heading to court today to finalize the divorce. In the middle of the night I received a text from H begging me not to do this. Well I guess I knew this wouldn't be easy. I pray now that there's no scene in court. I already feel all the support from my MIP family, and I appreciate it so much...
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yanksfan51
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13
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273
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One down 3 more to go :)
(Preview)
Monday was an awesome day .. made better by the fact STBAX accepted the deal .. woo hoooo! FINALLY .. I know he didn't have sense because his kid was going to have to testify against him .. it was the fact he was actually facing jail time if it went to court and even his atty was going .. you can't go to court fo...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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408
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Just venting
(Preview)
Went to couples counseling again yesterday. Always a good time. AW is now a dry drunk so she is way fun. Constant anger and attacks over how I made her get to this point and how she was helpless to stop me. No self reflection ZERO. The best is the therapist asks me to see it all from her point of view and I'm lik...
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TryingHard2013
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13
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458
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STEP 10
(Preview)
Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery STEP 10 HAS BEEN POSTED TO THE STEP WORK BOARD. PLEASE JOIN IN AND SHARE http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t56282982/alano...
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hotrod
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1
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162
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Messages...
(Preview)
Today we believe God wants us to know that ...until you learn how to say 'no', you will never be able to fully say 'yes'. Unless you know how to set boundaries to form your safe space, you will always be concerned that saying 'yes' might put you in danger. So you will always pull back a little from saying...
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Cathyinaz
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4
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267
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Can you say a few prayers for me
(Preview)
I could use a few extra prayers or kind thoughts if anyone could send some along.
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mm830
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18
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413
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A (scary) step in the right direction for my AM?
(Preview)
My dad told me last night that my AM was in the basement, tripped and fell and hit her head..she's got a bandaid on her forehead. My dad said she had to get my brother to help her upstairs. My dad then told me that she called him(my dad) to tell him what happened and that "she had had too much too drink&qu...
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phoenixmagicgirl
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4
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296
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Good Morning
(Preview)
Good Morning Everyone I haven't posted in a while and just need to I guess. I'm sick today...at home. I have COPD and when I get a cold it can be quite bad sometimes. What is bad? I can't talk For me to not talk is bad....lol My lungs and throat hurts...oh well poor me I also been having proble...
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Cathyinaz
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10
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453
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Can't get over anger issues
(Preview)
I have a lot of trouble with holding on to hatred and anger towards people who have hurt me - especially my spiritual teacher. Even when things were still kind of "pristine" between us, meaning he had been like 99% nice and kind up to a certain point, I still had trouble because I'm a cult surv...
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zebrafish
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13
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1267
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Moving Forward a Year After my AH's Passing
(Preview)
So I updated my avatar today. Last Thursday was the one year of anniversary of my AH's passing. I wanted to go away and be at a place that made me feel at peace- and this spot in my avatar photo is where I ended up (it's a lookout point in Kauai). I think I am finally at a point where I can start to give up the anger...
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Green Eyes
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7
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323
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What Do You Think?
(Preview)
You should be honest and tell your little children/adult children that you used drugs/alcohol at one time... or not say anything about your past use? Are they going to say "well you did it!" or will your lessons learned impress them? ....og
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oldergal
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9
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364
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Biggest fear not so big after all
(Preview)
If you are going through hell kept going the only way out is through.
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TryingHard2013
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8
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346
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Even in the Mess.... I Am Blessed...
(Preview)
Hey All... Was Sitting Rereading some of earlier Post, Seems they Help me See Growth and What I need to Work on, Something I have Always Loved about Writting... Just a Breif Update, HP has been Very Busy in my Grandkids Lives these Last 3wks since the Split, doing what HP Does... My Grandkids home is heat...
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Jozie
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4
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409
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Definitions
(Preview)
Well, I've been busy this morning reading and relating to all these posts. My meeting is tomorrow, and I am looking forward to it, but this forum is a tremendous resource for me, too. Thank you to all of you who offer such thoughtfulness and sincerity. I must be detaching. AH constantly complains/crie...
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ssilver
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7
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8284
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Trying to put my life in order and save our marriage.
(Preview)
My wife is recovering from a pretty bad addiction to a number of different types of pain medication over the past 6 years (which started almost as soon as our beautiful twins were born). It's amazing how bad that stuff really can be. She has been clean for 30 days (just got her chip over this past weekend)...
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skahtul
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21
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543
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What is denial?
(Preview)
I was wondering what denial is to you. For me denial was when I chose not live in reality, I chose to sweep hard facts under the carpet because they seemed too enormous to deal with. Denial for me was also the idea that I could change my alcoholic partner, if only I said the right thing or cooked the right di...
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el-cee
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15
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470
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A day in Al-Anon
(Preview)
We celebrate this annually on the Big Island. The west side of the island and the east side meet center distance in the village of Waimea and we introduce ourselves and others and have discussions on topics and a special speaker, this time it was Tom our World Service Rep and we snack and eat and hug and...
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Jerry F
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3
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261
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we were only going to church?
(Preview)
What a day, what a day. With all the progress I have made this episode can't drag me down. Even when the A is sober any little thing can trigger an "ism". Such as a son or daughter not living up to their expectations at church. My AH only wants to go to church when sober and I support him and go....
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1976love
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6
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601
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still not leaving and feeling weak for it
(Preview)
Here I am again, still home. I saidf my AH used/drank one more time I was taking the kids and leaving. Sure enough he came home in the middle of the night and thats exactly what he was doing. He gave me his usual speech I've been hearing over the past month and a half since he relapsed about how he is done and d...
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AmyK
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21
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522
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