Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

mm830 · mm830

I have had such a good week, thank you so much HP. It's been really full, doing errands for my grandmother post surgery and my teenage kiddo has been a grump. But what's so wonderful is I am applying some advice I read here, Debilyn posted something about asking herself what the loving thing to do is to hel...

Akavanagh · Akavanagh

Or is it just getting numb to it? If you read my first post, I'm completely new and just have so many unanswered questions. When you walk in the room, and your alcoholic has been drinking, do you ignore them? Do you talk to them? Do you act like nothing is wrong and everything is just dandy in order to maint...

vivalove · vivalove

Hi, my name is Jean and I am new to Al-Anon. I grew up in an alcoholic home (my father got sober when I was 12). For almost a year, and sometimes today, I failed to accept that this is my truth, because I am fearful that I am labeling it (my father) as good or bad (as a person) - when intellectually I know that it...

el-cee · el-cee

I am back to step 1, my life has became unmanageable. My son who has been great lately and has been staying with me, looking for somewhere but taking his time about it, was drinking in my house the other night. I got home from work and he had a shady looking pal in and they denied it but they were drinking. I to...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

My heartfelt thanks goes out to Elizabeth Vargas of ABC's Good Morning America for going pubic today about her alcoholism and sharing that AA has played a great part in her recovery. Hopefully, her story will inspire others. You can Google her name to view her interview that is available online. GE

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Things are going better than I could have imagined considering what is going on. First off, I didn't have to go to court .. that is huge. STBAX was sentenced .. I'm relieved that part is over .. I got dealt an unexpected surprise that there is not a no contact order in the final order and I'm disturbed abo...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Thanks for all your prayers. I got half way to my destination and had to turn back. White out conditions on major highways with foolish drivers still going 60 when they couldn't see anything and didn't know when the next snow drift was coming. I had talked with my Dad after learning where he'd be toda...

Stuckhere · Stuckhere

My husband is fixing to get out of Rehab at the Right Step Treatment Facility. He has not spoke to me untill last week to tell me that he will be coming home soon. That's literally all he said. Then 30 Sec to tell me to pick him up Tues at 11:30. During that 30 sec I some how convinced him to let me come to the last...

breamanic665 · breamanic665

Usually when I post i have a general direction to go with my posts. I will apologize that I am now venting only. I have to. I have to get this out of me and I wish there was something else to help cope. Im not able to get to meetings due to vehicle issues, but I do start therapy first thing on monday and im gratefu...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning All I have a little story to tell. I have been playing Words with Friends with my son for a few years now. When he was playing actively I would know he was OK, when he stopped playing I would know he was drinking. Like clock work he would again play after about 4 days. Well, he stopped pla...

Katytexasmom · Katytexasmom

My son left treatment after 2 weeks. He's been white knuckling his 'sobriety'. He's been great to talk to and even helped us move this weekend. He's been discouraged about his job search....his misdomeaner possession charge keeps getting in the way. He wanted to go back to his dads, so we dropped him...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

We sometimes get a lot of newcomers to these boards and I wanted to start a conversation about how to take the focus off of the alcoholic/addict and put the focus where we need it to be(usually us and/or our children). Many times the question comes up and we all know hard it is to take our eyes off the quali...

Lyne · Lyne

Hello-Well yesterday morning my A asked me one question and in a nano-second I was back to my old self, pre-alanon brain. We had a very unpleasant talk, not a fight really, and both set out for our days in a less than pleasant mood. I stayed angry all day yesterday. Doesn't she remember the drinking, t...

maryf · maryf

My boyfriend just went into a rehab facility a week ago. I was allowed to visit him the first weekend after he entered and did. It seemed to go well. His family thinks that I shouldn't go every weekend because he needs to work on his sobriety. He needs to miss me and his family. They don't intend to go....

Milehi-tlc · Milehi-tlc

Something recently dropped at my feet that I am struggling with. Im not sure exactly if this is an alanon question but most of my life decisions are centered on working my program so here goes......I discovered my best friends SO has a dating profile on a dating website. They have been living togethe...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Heading away tomorrow morning for 4 days with family. Daughter's birthday on Saturday and we will celebrate it far away with my parents, aunt and cousins at my parent's beach-house. Daughter wants a Doctor Who cake so somehow on Saturday we will all pitch in and make an edible tardis. I will not get su...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

ok .. so maybe not an ulcer but a knot in the pit of my stomach, definitely .. feeling sick tonight and just needed to put it out here .. i have a situation that i absolutely can't change .. i can't even accept that i can't change it .. it seems like it should be so easy to do and yet it is so hard .. i am certain i nee...

sweeetr · sweeetr

I havent been on in awhile.. I have had this peace and realization of letting go and realized how much happier I am without my AH. I had atty drawing up seperation of property and lives etc.... and then his dad past away unexpectidly. WELL .... we all know what an active A does when something like this happ...

maryanne · maryanne

Just wanted to ask what is the first step in dealing with folks in our lives that keep putting us down. I have a problem of not answering back when someone is nasty to me. I don't like to confront any one on bad behavior. How do we know when is the time to be silent and when is the time to speak up. I don't like...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Well, it won't fix everything however it's a good start thank you God! I have been out of work since November and it has been scary is putting it mildly. I was validated in ways I wasn't expecting. I knew that there were some things brewing at the temp job I had worked .. I received a call last month about...

anm722 · anm722

I absolutely HATE my husband for what he is putting me through. He just called from rehab because I needed to ask him a quick question and he sounds so normal and care free, while I'm out here in the real world feeling lost hopeless confused and angry. I hate this.

Lyne · Lyne

Yes, it's time to make some confessions. It is only now I can see the forest from the trees! Going back a few years, I need to share about some of the things I did in my futile attempt to cope with my A. I bought alcohol test strips that work from saliva. I snuck and looked at A's schedule to see when it look...

a new member.... · maryanne

I am so glad I found this place. I don't drive, and there are no meetings near when I live. I am so sad most of the time. I hurt. What I have been reading, has helped me a lot. Thanks for listening.

el-cee · el-cee

Ive been thinking about my progress and how ive been reacting most of the time lately and I think I have come up with a couple of answers, maybe. I think im too scared to fully live what im learning in alanon. when I connect with my higher power, let go of my own will and trust in the wisdom I have a good day. The...

Miamamamia · Miamamamia

How do I know ? Is my husband affected by the disease ? What are the signs ? Is it a dependency or is it alcoholic ? How much more can one take is it okay to walk away ? How can I make him see how can I help him change his ways ? He's not physically abusive, mentally i take my fair share daily, sometimes worst but nev...

mongowal · mongowal

AH has finally decided - He wants a divorce. He says his feelings of love for me are coming back but they will never be the same as the day he married me. Tried numerous times to blame mr for the the demise of our relationship (all of which are either completely irrational or completely false). For th...

SpiderArcana · SpiderArcana

Man. After coming here and sharing and making progress and everything I have tried to do, I feel like I am right back where I started. I have so much anger, and it reared its head today. I yelled at my husband. Twice. Full-on, top volume, roaring yell. I just got so sick of it. Everything is so awful, nothi...

anm722 · anm722

Hello all. I am a 27 year old female married with 3 kids. My husband and I have been together 11 years married 7. In the past 7 years my husband has been in and out of prison for different things. In the past 3 years I have found out that my husband had been doing heroin while we were seperated. After finding t...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

It disgusts me when people come off so selfish and unable to see beyond their own noses. And well I first found in in my addict Mother, everything too was about what she wanted, when, how and you better make it work out with all your might or be prepared! My exAH never once hit me, he got close and broke every...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

So careful to maneuver through the person that suffers from alcoholism. Even in the attempt to remain sober. I caught myself this time. I said NO! Not this time. I will not allow my recovery slide back not one single step this time! You may have the man I love still in your grips but I will not be yours toda...

grateful2be · grateful2be

My brother called me to let me know my 85 year old Dad has been hospitalized. I called my Dad who is usually concerned about me being on winter roads. I also know when he says, "Are you coming in?," he wants me there. He wants me to wait until Sunday since in his words: "It's too late now...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Car finally went to the mechanic today. Now I am no expert on cars by any means but i know a thing or 2, and I have told ABwhatever he is that the car sounds like it needs a new coil, which i had a spare one of, maybe some new ignition leads and that he could probably fix it himself for like $40. I even emailed him a...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

So, what I am trying to say right now is that nothing really has changed lately but my outlook has changed. I am still in the grips of this disease daily I just know that I can overcome the trials & tribulations that go along w/ it. I guess I can say I am an overcomer even if it is just an affirmation. I am a l...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I heard a lady share in a meeting the other night that she had tried to "help" a friend by giving advice and the friend said she had to hang up the phone and would call right back...the lady's friend never called back. the lady went on to say she then decided she'd call the friend herself but the f...

OnMySignal · OnMySignal

As mentioned, this is my first time to post anything. I have an AW that I love very much who is sober 55 weeks now, and we are having some problems. We have been married 21 years and have had a wonderful marriage in all aspects, but the disease got to be too much and she got help a year and half ago. Here we are ov...

LWI · LWI

I have no clue if this is the right forum to just post something like this, but I really need some words of support/advice. New member as of 3 minutes ago. I am actually an alcoholic myself. This might not sound like acceptable rational to some, but the reason I am writing is that my fiance (boyfriend of 18...

John · John

When I first heard that the best way to help an alcoholic was to focus on myself, I thought Al-Anon was a heartless place where I would be forced to stop caring about my loved ones. I had decided never to return, but someone shared a thought that changed my mind. He said that although the desire to help anot...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

This where I got my avatar picture we were wandering around OMGosh .. I thought the kids would kill me because we wound up in a brush of burrs .. LOL!

lenii263 · lenii263

I am 74 and still worrying about daughter who is 47 and has drank since she was 13. She has a S.O.(many relationships and 2 marriages) who supports and enables her, and has never asked for anything. It is just that I see she is dying, so thin now and looks awful. Her insides are so messed up she can't keep foo...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I'm so grateful for the Alanon program that has taught me some very basic lessons, .. lessons I didn't learn during my childhood because they just weren't available to me. This too shall pass .. (the AA version) like a kidney stone .. however it will pass. :) One door closes and another opens .. in the me...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I haven't heard from my mom today, however the reality is and it just dawned on me I won't "hear" from her, the entry point of surgery went through the front of her throat. She was suppose to be in the hospital for 3 days so we'll see .. I guess I figure no news is good news and knowing my mom .. lol ....

jillybean1 · jillybean1

Wow, my AH finally chose to go to rehab and now thinks he will do fine so he wants out early....lots of complaints about food, smoking, etc. etc.......I said that actions speak louder than words and that if he said he would do 30 days of inpatient , but leaves early.... than his actions show that he can't k...

Gaby · Gaby

Still getting through my tough times.. But my son is 15 days sober out of his environment. And facing jail time. I am going to as many f2f meetings and even meetings to help me understand the disease. I am just checking in to say. Hi !!

Debilyn · Debilyn

Now another tooth is going belly up, crown again. not sealed.I am a clean my teeth nut too.that is two now last week. throbbing. took med, strong stuff. Last night I fell again! second time! was trying to see that cat with binoculars, got twisted landed on me bum back and head. AND i yelled ex AH this is YOU...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I decided to upload some pictures that I have taken this of some of our adventures .. I tend to stay away from personal photos of the kids or myself, while I post those on my FB page .. that is pretty lock down on who can and can't see those. My avatar picture is one that was from a park here close to town .. it r...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Wow. Since I have stopped engaging with ABF or RSVPing to the multiple argument- invitations he sends me each day, I've had a great chance to stand back and watch my own internal reactions to the drama-factory. What triggered me, originally, to reach out for help was my first ever bout of serious pani...

bud · bud

I could please use some thoughts regarding getting myself unstuck from a situation involving my trauma therapist for treatment of PTSD. I have been receiving therapy when, in September, my health insurance changed and provided much less coverage. I told my therapist and she emphatically said n...

Kerrymom · Kerrymom

I'm new - finally got AH to agree to counseling as he finally heard I was done with him. So far he is saying all the right things to counselor and has even been sober a week. He thinks everything is fine now, we can't bring up the past even though he doesn't recall many of things he's done. I hope he has realiz...

mm830 · mm830

I did it, after listening to his ranting and blaming and all the nonsensical stuff and hearing how I place him on the priority list lower than a pack of sugar I just couldn't do it anymore. I told him I was done. I am a little freaked out but frankly I can't take this anymore anyway being attacked like this co...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Growing up in an alcoholic home, I received many inconsistent messages. My parents said one thing but then another happened. They acted one way in certain situations but then another way in other situations that completely con...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

I need to think a little before I post this, can someone delete the thread for me as I cannot? Thanks

-- Edited by Melly1248 on Monday 20th of January 2014 08:54:31 AM

tweety23 · tweety23

Hi.. I am new to everything al anon and right now cannot go to f2f because of babysitting issues. I have been to one in the past. Ah has never attempted sobriety or would even discuss. Also he is of a cultural background where excessive drinking is a norm so to speak. There is a HUGE sign in his bathroom, i...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Afternoon Everyone I have a whole lot of anxiety right now. Not because of my son but because of my cats. They are crated for the first time to try and retrain them to use the litter box again, to quit marking and get to know each other and not fight anymore. They are howling and trashing their crat...

dotandthekangaroo · dotandthekangaroo

I hope this isn't too controversial a question, but I really need some wisdom here: I was wondering if anyone might be interested in sharing stories of how they came to perceive the God of their particular understanding? I have long been interested in spirituality, but my understanding of God has alw...

mercedes1959 · mercedes1959

Hi everyone - I have been trying to lose weight this new year. I started with goals that were in five pound increments. I am finding that eating out is not easy and I have to start over a couple of days. I am not beating myself up, just one day at a time. I have also let go of a couple of friends, I am finding more p...

neshema2 · neshema2

I make no bones about how bad living with AH#1 was...He was a huge mistake...Its weird...Both of my fiances adn long term relationships ( I did not want to marry too young, wanted to put me in school and just did not want the trap my A mother was in....and I was afraid of men big time for obvious reasons) Bu...

Venera · Venera

So afraid to go to the first meeting, don't even know where. Afraid that people I know may be there, afraid to be a part of it, afraid to put my face... I don't know what needs to happened for me to attend it..

tortuga · tortuga

Since I have come to Al Anon (2012) and also very little before through therapy, I have come to realize, and still realize, my functioning, my triggers, my flaws. my defects. I have not always been aware of, some have functioned as a habit but now that I realize, i am shocked , yes, disgusted sometimes wi...

neshema2 · neshema2

Today I am Grateful for: My workouts are starting to show in my body , looks and I feel better exercising is making me more mellow my high school girlfriend's health tests came out "ok" I got an old client back and I see it working out very well this time, now I have the work I need I got a good deal...

mm830 · mm830

Last night I made the mistake of answering ASO's phone call, somehow I thought it would be him calling to be nice or something...well he called to puke up all his misery on me and blameshift. I have not been reacting as I once did except the little setback a few days ago. He ended up telling me that obviousl...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Being more loving is terrific (Preview) I have had such a good week, thank you so much HP. It's been really full, doing errands for my grandmother post surgery and my teenage kiddo has been a grump. But what's so wonderful is I am applying some advice I read here, Debilyn posted something about asking herself what the loving thing to do is to hel...	mm830	2	404	Jan 25, 2014 by hotrod
	Do you ever truly get to the point where it doesnt bother you? (Preview) Or is it just getting numb to it? If you read my first post, I'm completely new and just have so many unanswered questions. When you walk in the room, and your alcoholic has been drinking, do you ignore them? Do you talk to them? Do you act like nothing is wrong and everything is just dandy in order to maint...	Akavanagh	13	687	Jan 25, 2014 by Debilyn
	So far, this seems to be exactly where I belong... (Preview) Hi, my name is Jean and I am new to Al-Anon. I grew up in an alcoholic home (my father got sober when I was 12). For almost a year, and sometimes today, I failed to accept that this is my truth, because I am fearful that I am labeling it (my father) as good or bad (as a person) - when intellectually I know that it...	vivalove	4	386	Jan 25, 2014 by Debilyn
	My life is unmanageable (Preview) I am back to step 1, my life has became unmanageable. My son who has been great lately and has been staying with me, looking for somewhere but taking his time about it, was drinking in my house the other night. I got home from work and he had a shady looking pal in and they denied it but they were drinking. I to...	el-cee	7	584	Jan 25, 2014 by grateful2be
	Thank You, Elizabeth Vargas (Preview) My heartfelt thanks goes out to Elizabeth Vargas of ABC's Good Morning America for going pubic today about her alcoholism and sharing that AA has played a great part in her recovery. Hopefully, her story will inspire others. You can Google her name to view her interview that is available online. GE	Green Eyes	2	409	Jan 25, 2014 by Debilyn
	Well .. lol .. (Preview) Things are going better than I could have imagined considering what is going on. First off, I didn't have to go to court .. that is huge. STBAX was sentenced .. I'm relieved that part is over .. I got dealt an unexpected surprise that there is not a no contact order in the final order and I'm disturbed abo...	SerenityRUS	6	504	Jan 25, 2014 by Debilyn
	Update on Dad and Road Travel (Preview) Thanks for all your prayers. I got half way to my destination and had to turn back. White out conditions on major highways with foolish drivers still going 60 when they couldn't see anything and didn't know when the next snow drift was coming. I had talked with my Dad after learning where he'd be toda...	grateful2be	38	669	Jan 25, 2014 by mercedes1959
	Anyone with experience with Family Group at Right Step Treatment Facility? Rehab Family Counseling (Preview) My husband is fixing to get out of Rehab at the Right Step Treatment Facility. He has not spoke to me untill last week to tell me that he will be coming home soon. That's literally all he said. Then 30 Sec to tell me to pick him up Tues at 11:30. During that 30 sec I some how convinced him to let me come to the last...	Stuckhere	3	390	Jan 24, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	now im the one that feels insane - looking for an e-pen pal sponser/supporter (Preview) Usually when I post i have a general direction to go with my posts. I will apologize that I am now venting only. I have to. I have to get this out of me and I wish there was something else to help cope. Im not able to get to meetings due to vehicle issues, but I do start therapy first thing on monday and im gratefu...	breamanic665	4	495	Jan 24, 2014 by MorningGlory
	Don't try and keep an eye on them (Preview) Good Morning All I have a little story to tell. I have been playing Words with Friends with my son for a few years now. When he was playing actively I would know he was OK, when he stopped playing I would know he was drinking. Like clock work he would again play after about 4 days. Well, he stopped pla...	Cathyinaz	9	603	Jan 24, 2014 by Rose50
	Another rough night!!! (Preview) My son left treatment after 2 weeks. He's been white knuckling his 'sobriety'. He's been great to talk to and even helped us move this weekend. He's been discouraged about his job search....his misdomeaner possession charge keeps getting in the way. He wanted to go back to his dads, so we dropped him...	Katytexasmom	13	538	Jan 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	Focusing on the alcoholic (Preview) We sometimes get a lot of newcomers to these boards and I wanted to start a conversation about how to take the focus off of the alcoholic/addict and put the focus where we need it to be(usually us and/or our children). Many times the question comes up and we all know hard it is to take our eyes off the quali...	ilovedogs	9	538	Jan 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	Got stuck in the quicksand but didn't go down! (Preview) Hello-Well yesterday morning my A asked me one question and in a nano-second I was back to my old self, pre-alanon brain. We had a very unpleasant talk, not a fight really, and both set out for our days in a less than pleasant mood. I stayed angry all day yesterday. Doesn't she remember the drinking, t...	Lyne	6	397	Jan 24, 2014 by el-cee
	Completely new with many questions (Preview) My boyfriend just went into a rehab facility a week ago. I was allowed to visit him the first weekend after he entered and did. It seemed to go well. His family thinks that I shouldn't go every weekend because he needs to work on his sobriety. He needs to miss me and his family. They don't intend to go....	maryf	12	482	Jan 24, 2014 by MeTwo2
	Dilema (Preview) Something recently dropped at my feet that I am struggling with. Im not sure exactly if this is an alanon question but most of my life decisions are centered on working my program so here goes......I discovered my best friends SO has a dating profile on a dating website. They have been living togethe...	Milehi-tlc	14	392	Jan 24, 2014 by pinkchip
	Away. (Preview) Heading away tomorrow morning for 4 days with family. Daughter's birthday on Saturday and we will celebrate it far away with my parents, aunt and cousins at my parent's beach-house. Daughter wants a Doctor Who cake so somehow on Saturday we will all pitch in and make an edible tardis. I will not get su...	Melly1248	23	601	Jan 24, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	4th step ulcer//change .. (Preview) ok .. so maybe not an ulcer but a knot in the pit of my stomach, definitely .. feeling sick tonight and just needed to put it out here .. i have a situation that i absolutely can't change .. i can't even accept that i can't change it .. it seems like it should be so easy to do and yet it is so hard .. i am certain i nee...	MeTwo2	15	461	Jan 24, 2014 by milkwood
	goin backwards ... NNNOOOOOOO ! (Preview) I havent been on in awhile.. I have had this peace and realization of letting go and realized how much happier I am without my AH. I had atty drawing up seperation of property and lives etc.... and then his dad past away unexpectidly. WELL .... we all know what an active A does when something like this happ...	sweeetr	7	499	Jan 24, 2014 by maryanne
	A co-dependent question?????? (Preview) Just wanted to ask what is the first step in dealing with folks in our lives that keep putting us down. I have a problem of not answering back when someone is nasty to me. I don't like to confront any one on bad behavior. How do we know when is the time to be silent and when is the time to speak up. I don't like...	maryanne	18	642	Jan 24, 2014 by Ifnotforgrace
	Turn of events .. woot woot :) (Preview) Well, it won't fix everything however it's a good start thank you God! I have been out of work since November and it has been scary is putting it mildly. I was validated in ways I wasn't expecting. I knew that there were some things brewing at the temp job I had worked .. I received a call last month about...	SerenityRUS	15	409	Jan 23, 2014 by Green Eyes
	So angry (Preview) I absolutely HATE my husband for what he is putting me through. He just called from rehab because I needed to ask him a quick question and he sounds so normal and care free, while I'm out here in the real world feeling lost hopeless confused and angry. I hate this.	anm722	23	444	Jan 23, 2014 by cwya
	past embarrassing behaviors (Preview) Yes, it's time to make some confessions. It is only now I can see the forest from the trees! Going back a few years, I need to share about some of the things I did in my futile attempt to cope with my A. I bought alcohol test strips that work from saliva. I snuck and looked at A's schedule to see when it look...	Lyne	8	486	Jan 23, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	a new member.... (Preview) I am so glad I found this place. I don't drive, and there are no meetings near when I live. I am so sad most of the time. I hurt. What I have been reading, has helped me a lot. Thanks for listening.	maryanne	6	384	Jan 23, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Trust issues (Preview) Ive been thinking about my progress and how ive been reacting most of the time lately and I think I have come up with a couple of answers, maybe. I think im too scared to fully live what im learning in alanon. when I connect with my higher power, let go of my own will and trust in the wisdom I have a good day. The...	el-cee	20	653	Jan 23, 2014 by ryanhearted
	how do you know Is Al-anon for me (Preview) How do I know ? Is my husband affected by the disease ? What are the signs ? Is it a dependency or is it alcoholic ? How much more can one take is it okay to walk away ? How can I make him see how can I help him change his ways ? He's not physically abusive, mentally i take my fair share daily, sometimes worst but nev...	Miamamamia	13	812	Jan 23, 2014 by MeTwo2
	Divorce (Preview) AH has finally decided - He wants a divorce. He says his feelings of love for me are coming back but they will never be the same as the day he married me. Tried numerous times to blame mr for the the demise of our relationship (all of which are either completely irrational or completely false). For th...	mongowal	7	561	Jan 22, 2014 by Beatrice
	Back to square one (Preview) Man. After coming here and sharing and making progress and everything I have tried to do, I feel like I am right back where I started. I have so much anger, and it reared its head today. I yelled at my husband. Twice. Full-on, top volume, roaring yell. I just got so sick of it. Everything is so awful, nothi...	SpiderArcana	10	526	Jan 22, 2014 by SpiderArcana
	New to all of this and need major help/advice (Preview) Hello all. I am a 27 year old female married with 3 kids. My husband and I have been together 11 years married 7. In the past 7 years my husband has been in and out of prison for different things. In the past 3 years I have found out that my husband had been doing heroin while we were seperated. After finding t...	anm722	24	607	Jan 22, 2014 by anm722
	Why am I attracted to big selfish egos? (Preview) It disgusts me when people come off so selfish and unable to see beyond their own noses. And well I first found in in my addict Mother, everything too was about what she wanted, when, how and you better make it work out with all your might or be prepared! My exAH never once hit me, he got close and broke every...	Breakingfree	10	713	Jan 22, 2014 by Melly1248
	Saying NO to the disease. (Preview) So careful to maneuver through the person that suffers from alcoholism. Even in the attempt to remain sober. I caught myself this time. I said NO! Not this time. I will not allow my recovery slide back not one single step this time! You may have the man I love still in your grips but I will not be yours toda...	Mari1978	6	744	Jan 22, 2014 by Breakingfree
	My Dad (Preview) My brother called me to let me know my 85 year old Dad has been hospitalized. I called my Dad who is usually concerned about me being on winter roads. I also know when he says, "Are you coming in?," he wants me there. He wants me to wait until Sunday since in his words: "It's too late now...	grateful2be	24	415	Jan 21, 2014 by mercedes1959
	I didn't say it!!! (Preview) Car finally went to the mechanic today. Now I am no expert on cars by any means but i know a thing or 2, and I have told ABwhatever he is that the car sounds like it needs a new coil, which i had a spare one of, maybe some new ignition leads and that he could probably fix it himself for like $40. I even emailed him a...	Melly1248	14	748	Jan 21, 2014 by bud
	things are the same but different.. (Preview) So, what I am trying to say right now is that nothing really has changed lately but my outlook has changed. I am still in the grips of this disease daily I just know that I can overcome the trials & tribulations that go along w/ it. I guess I can say I am an overcomer even if it is just an affirmation. I am a l...	Hoot Nanny	3	356	Jan 21, 2014 by bud
	Leaving Well Enough Alone (Preview) I heard a lady share in a meeting the other night that she had tried to "help" a friend by giving advice and the friend said she had to hang up the phone and would call right back...the lady's friend never called back. the lady went on to say she then decided she'd call the friend herself but the f...	WorkingThroughIt	11	672	Jan 21, 2014 by ClearTheFog
	First Timer, Needs Some Veteran Advice (Preview) As mentioned, this is my first time to post anything. I have an AW that I love very much who is sober 55 weeks now, and we are having some problems. We have been married 21 years and have had a wonderful marriage in all aspects, but the disease got to be too much and she got help a year and half ago. Here we are ov...	OnMySignal	9	640	Jan 21, 2014 by OnMySignal
	Is this the right forum... (Preview) I have no clue if this is the right forum to just post something like this, but I really need some words of support/advice. New member as of 3 minutes ago. I am actually an alcoholic myself. This might not sound like acceptable rational to some, but the reason I am writing is that my fiance (boyfriend of 18...	LWI	6	416	Jan 21, 2014 by pinkchip
	Courage to Change (Yesterdays Reading) (Preview) When I first heard that the best way to help an alcoholic was to focus on myself, I thought Al-Anon was a heartless place where I would be forced to stop caring about my loved ones. I had decided never to return, but someone shared a thought that changed my mind. He said that although the desire to help anot...	John	9	1996	Jan 21, 2014 by DavidG
	Fall Pictures Part 2 (Preview) This where I got my avatar picture we were wandering around OMGosh .. I thought the kids would kill me because we wound up in a brush of burrs .. LOL!	SerenityRUS	0	231	Jan 20, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	How can one stop worrying? (Preview) I am 74 and still worrying about daughter who is 47 and has drank since she was 13. She has a S.O.(many relationships and 2 marriages) who supports and enables her, and has never asked for anything. It is just that I see she is dying, so thin now and looks awful. Her insides are so messed up she can't keep foo...	lenii263	3	458	Jan 20, 2014 by Katytexasmom
	Moving Forward . . (Preview) I'm so grateful for the Alanon program that has taught me some very basic lessons, .. lessons I didn't learn during my childhood because they just weren't available to me. This too shall pass .. (the AA version) like a kidney stone .. however it will pass. :) One door closes and another opens .. in the me...	SerenityRUS	6	465	Jan 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	Update and such :) (Preview) I haven't heard from my mom today, however the reality is and it just dawned on me I won't "hear" from her, the entry point of surgery went through the front of her throat. She was suppose to be in the hospital for 3 days so we'll see .. I guess I figure no news is good news and knowing my mom .. lol ....	SerenityRUS	8	431	Jan 20, 2014 by Breakingfree
	He wants out of rehab! (Preview) Wow, my AH finally chose to go to rehab and now thinks he will do fine so he wants out early....lots of complaints about food, smoking, etc. etc.......I said that actions speak louder than words and that if he said he would do 30 days of inpatient , but leaves early.... than his actions show that he can't k...	jillybean1	10	688	Jan 20, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Hi.. (Preview) Still getting through my tough times.. But my son is 15 days sober out of his environment. And facing jail time. I am going to as many f2f meetings and even meetings to help me understand the disease. I am just checking in to say. Hi !!	Gaby	14	606	Jan 20, 2014 by Jen61
	did anyone see the truck that ran over me? (Preview) Now another tooth is going belly up, crown again. not sealed.I am a clean my teeth nut too.that is two now last week. throbbing. took med, strong stuff. Last night I fell again! second time! was trying to see that cat with binoculars, got twisted landed on me bum back and head. AND i yelled ex AH this is YOU...	Debilyn	7	803	Jan 20, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Fall Pictures 2013 (Preview) I decided to upload some pictures that I have taken this of some of our adventures .. I tend to stay away from personal photos of the kids or myself, while I post those on my FB page .. that is pretty lock down on who can and can't see those. My avatar picture is one that was from a park here close to town .. it r...	SerenityRUS	3	235	Jan 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	Over-reacting. (Preview) Wow. Since I have stopped engaging with ABF or RSVPing to the multiple argument- invitations he sends me each day, I've had a great chance to stand back and watch my own internal reactions to the drama-factory. What triggered me, originally, to reach out for help was my first ever bout of serious pani...	Melly1248	21	643	Jan 20, 2014 by Breakingfree
	help needed- problem with trauma therapist (Preview) I could please use some thoughts regarding getting myself unstuck from a situation involving my trauma therapist for treatment of PTSD. I have been receiving therapy when, in September, my health insurance changed and provided much less coverage. I told my therapist and she emphatically said n...	bud	23	605	Jan 20, 2014 by bud
	All is forgotten? (Preview) I'm new - finally got AH to agree to counseling as he finally heard I was done with him. So far he is saying all the right things to counselor and has even been sober a week. He thinks everything is fine now, we can't bring up the past even though he doesn't recall many of things he's done. I hope he has realiz...	Kerrymom	7	413	Jan 20, 2014 by cwya
	I told him I am done (Preview) I did it, after listening to his ranting and blaming and all the nonsensical stuff and hearing how I place him on the priority list lower than a pack of sugar I just couldn't do it anymore. I told him I was done. I am a little freaked out but frankly I can't take this anymore anyway being attacked like this co...	mm830	26	865	Jan 20, 2014 by yanksfan51
	That feeling that something just isn't adding up.... (Preview) Hi everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Growing up in an alcoholic home, I received many inconsistent messages. My parents said one thing but then another happened. They acted one way in certain situations but then another way in other situations that completely con...	slogan_jim	12	557	Jan 20, 2014 by abbyal
	I'll take this as a nudge? (Preview) I need to think a little before I post this, can someone delete the thread for me as I cannot? Thanks -- Edited by Melly1248 on Monday 20th of January 2014 08:54:31 AM	Melly1248	4	396	Jan 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	Why am I more scared of this. (Preview) Hi.. I am new to everything al anon and right now cannot go to f2f because of babysitting issues. I have been to one in the past. Ah has never attempted sobriety or would even discuss. Also he is of a cultural background where excessive drinking is a norm so to speak. There is a HUGE sign in his bathroom, i...	tweety23	14	620	Jan 20, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Anxiety (Preview) Good Afternoon Everyone I have a whole lot of anxiety right now. Not because of my son but because of my cats. They are crated for the first time to try and retrain them to use the litter box again, to quit marking and get to know each other and not fight anymore. They are howling and trashing their crat...	Cathyinaz	32	1522	Jan 20, 2014 by Melly1248
	Help: God of my understanding? (Preview) I hope this isn't too controversial a question, but I really need some wisdom here: I was wondering if anyone might be interested in sharing stories of how they came to perceive the God of their particular understanding? I have long been interested in spirituality, but my understanding of God has alw...	dotandthekangaroo	13	718	Jan 19, 2014 by likemyheart
	Doing good things for me in the New Year, please share what you are doing for u (Preview) Hi everyone - I have been trying to lose weight this new year. I started with goals that were in five pound increments. I am finding that eating out is not easy and I have to start over a couple of days. I am not beating myself up, just one day at a time. I have also let go of a couple of friends, I am finding more p...	mercedes1959	11	471	Jan 19, 2014 by tiredtonite
	I guess even HE was a blessing to me (Preview) I make no bones about how bad living with AH#1 was...He was a huge mistake...Its weird...Both of my fiances adn long term relationships ( I did not want to marry too young, wanted to put me in school and just did not want the trap my A mother was in....and I was afraid of men big time for obvious reasons) Bu...	neshema2	12	482	Jan 19, 2014 by tiredtonite
	Afraid to go to the F2F meeting for the first time (Preview) So afraid to go to the first meeting, don't even know where. Afraid that people I know may be there, afraid to be a part of it, afraid to put my face... I don't know what needs to happened for me to attend it..	Venera	19	511	Jan 19, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	discovery and acceptance of my character flaws... (Preview) Since I have come to Al Anon (2012) and also very little before through therapy, I have come to realize, and still realize, my functioning, my triggers, my flaws. my defects. I have not always been aware of, some have functioned as a habit but now that I realize, i am shocked , yes, disgusted sometimes wi...	tortuga	7	2084	Jan 19, 2014 by tortuga
	What am I grateful for???? (Preview) Today I am Grateful for: My workouts are starting to show in my body , looks and I feel better exercising is making me more mellow my high school girlfriend's health tests came out "ok" I got an old client back and I see it working out very well this time, now I have the work I need I got a good deal...	neshema2	11	416	Jan 19, 2014 by neshema2
	Finding a little humor in the put downs (Preview) Last night I made the mistake of answering ASO's phone call, somehow I thought it would be him calling to be nice or something...well he called to puke up all his misery on me and blameshift. I have not been reacting as I once did except the little setback a few days ago. He ended up telling me that obviousl...	mm830	5	393	Jan 18, 2014 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.