Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

debhud · debhud

last night i made plans to visit my AS. i accidentally fell asleep and didn't make it. i felt horrible and apologized several times. he left me a message to stay out of his life. he brought up a lot of of my past parenting mistakes. in the past i have tried making amends to him for the things i did or did not...

Beatrice · Beatrice

"Be here now. Keep your vibe high, be gentile, but honest. Expect nothing, enjoy those you love, be curious be present, laugh a lot. Love a lot. Stay open to mystery, awe and wonder. Commune with nature, have faith, trust guidance, release fear, let go....." ...

jillybean1 · jillybean1

Hello all. Here are my thoughts on recovery.....I had to re-read all my books yesterday after talking to AH in rehab.....he is soon to be released and they have given him aftercare treatment options. I don't know what he will choose as I left it to him when he asked me what I wanted. (Well, I did tell hi...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

so many of you have responded to me these past few weeks. i cherish all your love and insight. i digest it all , "take want i want and leave the rest" so, let me say, i hear your concerns. . all of them, i do. and yes as i awake this morning im thinking, "have i done it again, have i cried wolf&qu...

PNR817 · PNR817

Hey everyone. I'm brand new in here and I'm not sure where to begin. It's kinda crazy anyway, because I grew up with an alcoholic father and now my 2nd husband is an alcoholic. The extreme difference in the two of them is that even though my father was very functional (not at all now, he has had heart atta...

Jozie · Jozie

Isn't it something How Deep this Disease can Go? Isn't it Insanity the Length One will Go, or When I STOP and Look around I Realize tho at times Just How many People it effects in a Long Chain of Events one at a Time, Event after Event... Its So Much Deeper then I can even Imagine Most days... I have been Wo...

saralee77777 · saralee77777

Hello, I am new to this board and have only been to one meeting in person. I am currently attending a woman's group at church on Wednesday's and on Sunday's I volunteer during first service, attend a class, then attend second service. I started going when my daughter starting having difficulties at ho...

chadg · chadg

This has become a normal occurance. Every morning he gets mad at for something and I honestly have no idea what I did. Yesterday, the same thing he comes home at the end of the day and says you don't care too much you never called me today to find out why I was mad. I am trying to figure out how to say to him t...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. it is 11:30 pm and I am wide awake. I thought I'd share something. At my last meeting I brought something up on being independent and working for things vs. a sense of entitlement. I mentioned that even with all my years of experienc...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

First off I will admit I should not be checking up on the A. I have been back and forth to my house taking things out and I notice that he is drinking NyQuil. I understand I am powerless over him and alcohol...but I am dying to ask people here...would you count NyQuil as drinking alcohol??? It has alcohol in...

chadg · chadg

This is my first time posting here... Married 11 years together for 17. I have 2 amazing kids. Husband is totally unreasonable...He goes out and drinks most nights, cannot even think of the last time he didn't. Comes home drunk, either passes out on the couch or comes up to bed and usually wakes me...

mm830 · mm830

I haven't posted for awhile, life has thrown me some curve balls and I forgot about step one, powerlessness. My mentally ill son was hospitalized for threatening suicide and more due to not taking his meds, and A was unbelievably supportive and non judgemental. Very strange, unexpected, and I feel g...

goldenchild1 · goldenchild1

Hello, I am a family member of an alcoholic and new to this site, however, I am not sure if I am in the right place. I joined in at 9 PM, but from what I was reading the mtg usually begins reading of the Twelve Steps of Al-Anon. Is this something that I would do on my own or does someone conduct the meeting...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

This is bothering me...I moved out with our kids over a week ago. My AH has a lot of junk. Seriously. He is a hoarder. I have begged and pleaded with him to clean during the last 11 years of living together. He has finally decided to clean up AFtER we move out! How ironic. :( Maybe he has finally hit rock bott...

Starting Again · Starting Again

I have heard people mention their "tool box" that they use to help them recover. I know reading the Al Anon literature is a tool, as is going to meetings. Can anyone share what other specific tools they use. Tools for serenity, detachment, coping, etc. Thank you

PP · PP

Choose wisely who you give your energy to. Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.

NanaOfSix · NanaOfSix

I am a Mother of 4, Grandmother of 6. I have a 36 yr. old non functioning alcoholic daughter. She has struggled with addictions since the age of 15, starting with crack-cocaine and alcohol, narcotics, methadone and now straight alcohol. She had 3 children, ages now 18, and 9 yr. old twin girls ( I have f...

Beatrice · Beatrice

" There is no passion to be found in settling for a life that is less then the one you are capable of living." Nelson Mandela

southernlass · southernlass

Hi, I have only been with the program for just over a week but I am already wondering when is the right time to choose a sponsor??? I have only attended 2 face to face meetings but already feel the benefit of the program. Is it to early to be thinking about a sponsor?? I look forward to hearing from anyone wi...

kdhmftexfiance · kdhmftexfiance

I have been away from Al Anon for about a year now. I attended for about year after I ended an engagement with an alcoholic, bipolar guy. It was great to get the support for awhile, but then I began to feel wrong about my sponsor, and stuck on the fourth step, and found meetings depressing the more I got t...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Thank you all for your prayers and support since my Dad entered the hospital and then the SNF in January. At 3:40 this morning, he died. I was alone in his room with him. This past Sunday, he didn't want me to leave him and go back home. I knew it was because he wanted me to be with him when he died. I had to...

SpiderArcana · SpiderArcana

Warning flags are popping up. After weeks of massive improvement, I'm afraid that he might be drinking again. Crappy mood, slight slurring of words, 'poor-me' party. Or, you know, he might just be in a crappy mood and I'm overthinking. Must not listen to the crazy-brain.

mercedes1959 · mercedes1959

Hi - It's Robin, I am at work. I found some new ways to advertise and find mystery shoppers for our company. My co worker followed through by placing an ad in a Thrifty Nickel. I heard the owner say, "Don't hold your breath". This makes me angry. I am looking at my 4th step again. One of my defects...

cmb · cmb

My ABF has been telling me on a monthly basis, "I don't now what I want, I was in a relationship like this for 14 years, I don't know if I want this". I realized what he meant was, when I complained, questioned or showed concern over his pills/cocaine/alchohol use - he leaves me! Huh...I did it a...

Forgiveness82 · Forgiveness82

My A is an ex who I was with for five years. Love of my life but depleted my soul with his drinking. We split but he called this week promising to change and talks of marriage. Anyone want to share their experiences with me from similar situations?

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

well i think this has been coming for awhile and as terrifying as it is, i think i am ready to be out of this alc marriage. i made mention to ah this morning that we need to talk . he quickyl was defensive and explosive and full.of blame to me . . screaming yelling. daughter crying. i stated WE ARE MISERABLE . ....

Family member with dt's in icu · Worried72

5 days ago my alcoholic sister was admitted to the hospital by her husband, who had no knowledge of her drinking, thinking she had some type of brain tumor or low blood sugar, denial can be very powerful. I had suspected she was drinking for about a month now, not knowing exactly how bad It had gotten, I c...

samb · samb

Hiya. This is the first time I have posted. I have an alcoholic mother. Her drinking started when she emigrated to Canada from the U.K fifteen years ago. This also coincided with me (her only child) giving birth to her first grandchild. I have since had three further children. The last fifteen years ha...

sadsusie · sadsusie

I have posted quite a lot over the last few days...I am certainly at a crossroads. I am considering moving out...going to see the place tomorrow, and ought to take it or I will be waiting for another to open up. My AH has been through rehab. I had left him shortly before that for the first time (only time)...

el-cee · el-cee

While living with my ex ah, I ran from the truth of our life, of my life in many things, books and studying, tv, internet, work, anything that distracted me from thinking things through, from being still and quiet and listening to my own soul. My first year in alanon, I spent my time facing it all, listeni...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

Hi everyone Happy St Patricks Day yesterday at work (I do a form of customer service) a customer (about 30 years old) and her mother hurled insults at me. I guess they felt because they were paying me they could take out their anxiety on me. I had made a mistake that wasn't going to cost them any money and w...

tweety23 · tweety23

my AH has been white-knuckling sobriety for two months. Although I know it will not last I have to admit it has been a very blissful two months. It honestly felt like we were normal people for a while and I didn't have a ball of nerves in my stomach all the time. However i think the honeymoon period is over an...

Starting Again · Starting Again

I have been lurking on this board for several years and had to finally delurk. I chose the name Starting Again because I feel like I am always starting over at step one. My husband is an alcoholic. That is hard for me to write. I found out 8 years ago when he told me. He was very good at hiding it. Over th...

NavySealWife · NavySealWife

MY AH HAS VERY SINGLE TYPE OF LIE AND EXCUSE TO GET A DRINK. I COME HOME AND ALL HE WANTS IS MONEY FOR WHAT EVER HE MAKES A LIE FOR AND HE PROMISES ME TO COME HOME SO WE CAN HAVE OUR DATE NIGHT FRIDAY. SO HERE I AM HOME ALONE AND I DONT KNOW IF I CAN DO IT. I FEEL THAT IT TAKING ME DOWN WITH HIS DISEASE. BUT I NEED TO GO BAC...

abell · abell

all of last year we were broken up and i was going to alanon and getting on a recovery path. i relapsed over the holidays and went over to his house, and he got me pregnant. I have 6 months until my due date. i moved in with him. he said we are back together again. the first month he drank and was crazy and o...

Rose50 · Rose50

I took a call from my son today - well actually it was a doctor who called from a hospital telling me my son was assaulted by someone in the rooming house where he's been living and wanted to reach out to me. He transferred the call and I spoke with my son. He told me he was beaten up, had some of his things stol...

bora · bora

Hey, I'm pretty new. Have had two meetings... I'm afraid I lost it tonight. I have been thinking of the art of letting go (what a relief not to feel guilty for doing things /for not doing things for not leaving /for not trying hard enough) This week I have been thinking of progress not perfection and als...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I again called exAH to let him know that my 16 year old wants to head back with him and my little one for her Spring break next week and well I could tell he was hanging. Once I realized he was probably drinking every night after work while I had our 5 year old and I just got so mad. I told him he is an idiot and that...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

lol. I get a student allowance. And I'm extremely grateful for it. However the other day I received a phone call to tell me that my allowance had been cancelled as I had not attended an appointment. I called and was told that this was a mistake as I was a) not required to attend an appointment and b) my allow...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

My AH just got back from a business trip. He is being very nice and communicative. Ah yes, out of the ordinary at this point because he's been silent and derisive last week. I just needed a place to vent. I'm going to a meeting tonight, thankfully! I'm just so tired of the up and the down. One day he a...

Mari1988 · Mari1988

Hi all,My name is Marisa and my husband is an AH & NA. I found this website last night when my husband was drunk and raging out. I feel like Im walking on glass. I need help because my heart is heavy. I feel like I need someone to talk too thats been in my shoes or is wearing them. My husband has been drinkin...

sadsusie · sadsusie

So My AH convinced me to give him a 2nd chance. He agreed to the following among other things 90 meetings in 90 days, if he were to miss a meeting he goes to two the next day. No drinking obviously. no lying. SO 1. He found some beer I had hidden and drank it. 2. lied and said that he "dumped it"...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t57030894/alanon-step-2/

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi Everyone I'm in a state I don't like. No I'm not having one bit of problem with my son but I used to be able to handle most anything that comes my way but lately that has changed. Example: I lost my doctor and hospital because of the insurance company not picking up the network. I went right into panic...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

As usual on a rainy day I am not having fun! I haven't been able to kick up my heels & jump in some rain puddles. I am struggling w/ hurry & indesion. Can't spell either. I am trying not to stress over anything. I just want to slow down & take it all in. The rain doesn't usually bother me too much bu...

mongowal · mongowal

AH has been out of house for 7 months now. He avoids me at all costs with reasons like "If I see you I will want you" or "It is too hard on me to see you". Had a conversation with AH the other day and I have to say instead of letting his irrational thoughts get to me, I almost had to laug...

redred · redred

This may be like asking the length of a piece of string BUT how long can someone survive with serious liver disease while continuing to drink? My mum has severe ascites, no appetite, has lost over three stone in weight, very shaky, cold, has difficulty walking, gets very confused and makes up things t...

Kerrymom · Kerrymom

Finally said it today in counseling, been weighing on me since my baby was born, just short of 6 weeks early, it's my fault she was premature. I was so stressed trying to keep it together, shield my son from the dysfunction of drunk dad, my anger at AH, and I had went away for a girl scrapbook weekend the wee...

Forgiveness82 · Forgiveness82

I attended my first Al-Anon meeting yesterday in Canada. It was absolutely amazing. I was scared to attend but I left there feeling like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulder. Just a post of appreciation and gratitude.

Akavanagh · Akavanagh

Hey guys, quick question. When the A in your life chooses not to drink that day, do you bring it up in almost a "thank you for making that choice today" sort of way? Or is it better to just not mention it? Or is it better to just carry on as usual?

redred · redred

Hello this is my first time on here. I have just returned from my Mums house. Its her Birthday. I brought cards and presents. The visit started well until she started rehashing things that happened in the past. Most of which she does not remember properly. She changes the stories and adds in load...

Lyne · Lyne

Someone I have grown to care about got sick this week and landed in the hospital. It really threw me. Couldn't sleep for two nights. I have taken a good, long look at myself as a result. I am not afraid to die (I'm not wanting to die). What I really fear is loss. I fear loss so much so that for the last at l...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

thank you for the PM. i am not able to reply though as i always get an error message. i can receive the PMs though.and would love to e chat with you. if you are able, send me an email through pm and i will correspond with you via email. otherwise thank you. a kindred spirit you may be and our profession itself m...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Umm .. I don't even know where to start on this post .. I will be able to share more after today and I will try to get into my coffee shop to do so .. LOL. I had court on Monday and my atty is stating that there seems to be an urgency to end the divorce .. which is great .. however .. based upon what I know .. I may be th...

tortuga · tortuga

hello MIP, well I'm still working my program far away from Al Anon meetings. But nevertheless I am changing my behaviors and attitudes through keeping up the work. And HP does it such ways, that here in my remote area, I also came across the issue of alcoholic disease and it's partner: co-dependence. N...

canadianguy · canadianguy

I stumbled across a new quote that is now among my "recovery" favorites.... "You don't have to attend every argument you're invited to." - Author Unknown.... I think that one speaks volumes, and it made me smile today. Tom p.s. My "favorites list" would now includ...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I have my little one for Spring break and I had to take her to the ER last night for a major bladder infection. This is the second one since he has had her, no history of this before. I called him to find out when she got off the last antibiotic and he sounded drunk and could not tell me what she was on and the las...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

If ya'll could please send some prayers/good thoughts my family's way I'd appreciate it..we have decided to do a professional intervention for my AM. It's in 03/30/2014. My dad, brother, sister & I already met once with the person my brother knows...we're meeting again this weekend..and in th...

el-cee · el-cee

Another realisation I have had, thanks to a member of this fellowship is that this program takes serious committment. Setting boundaries of my own and living this program. Its not enough just to know it and think it. You have got to live it . I have not been living it fully, is it possible to live it fully?...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am not new to this site; I just haven't been on here for awhile. For those who don't know me, I have been coming to our local library to get on here for years. I am unable to even though I have a tablet been able to post. Long story: I can't seem to be comfortable on the chairs. I am on my knees right now. I am frus...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	made a mistake. AS upset. (Preview) last night i made plans to visit my AS. i accidentally fell asleep and didn't make it. i felt horrible and apologized several times. he left me a message to stay out of his life. he brought up a lot of of my past parenting mistakes. in the past i have tried making amends to him for the things i did or did not...	debhud	11	554	Mar 21, 2014 by Debilyn
	Rules for healthy living (Preview) "Be here now. Keep your vibe high, be gentile, but honest. Expect nothing, enjoy those you love, be curious be present, laugh a lot. Love a lot. Stay open to mystery, awe and wonder. Commune with nature, have faith, trust guidance, release fear, let go....." ...	Beatrice	4	312	Mar 20, 2014 by bud
	recovery and moral obligation (Preview) Hello all. Here are my thoughts on recovery.....I had to re-read all my books yesterday after talking to AH in rehab.....he is soon to be released and they have given him aftercare treatment options. I don't know what he will choose as I left it to him when he asked me what I wanted. (Well, I did tell hi...	jillybean1	6	464	Mar 20, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	update "leaving" (Preview) so many of you have responded to me these past few weeks. i cherish all your love and insight. i digest it all , "take want i want and leave the rest" so, let me say, i hear your concerns. . all of them, i do. and yes as i awake this morning im thinking, "have i done it again, have i cried wolf&qu...	Theoceancalls	15	534	Mar 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	New and Lost (Preview) Hey everyone. I'm brand new in here and I'm not sure where to begin. It's kinda crazy anyway, because I grew up with an alcoholic father and now my 2nd husband is an alcoholic. The extreme difference in the two of them is that even though my father was very functional (not at all now, he has had heart atta...	PNR817	11	397	Mar 20, 2014 by sadsusie
	Grabbin "Recovery/Boot" Straps One More Time... (Preview) Isn't it something How Deep this Disease can Go? Isn't it Insanity the Length One will Go, or When I STOP and Look around I Realize tho at times Just How many People it effects in a Long Chain of Events one at a Time, Event after Event... Its So Much Deeper then I can even Imagine Most days... I have been Wo...	Jozie	1	519	Mar 20, 2014 by hotrod
	First Time Posting (Preview) Hello, I am new to this board and have only been to one meeting in person. I am currently attending a woman's group at church on Wednesday's and on Sunday's I volunteer during first service, attend a class, then attend second service. I started going when my daughter starting having difficulties at ho...	saralee77777	6	359	Mar 20, 2014 by Jozie
	He's mad again (Preview) This has become a normal occurance. Every morning he gets mad at for something and I honestly have no idea what I did. Yesterday, the same thing he comes home at the end of the day and says you don't care too much you never called me today to find out why I was mad. I am trying to figure out how to say to him t...	chadg	7	427	Mar 20, 2014 by bud
	Independent vs. entitled (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. it is 11:30 pm and I am wide awake. I thought I'd share something. At my last meeting I brought something up on being independent and working for things vs. a sense of entitlement. I mentioned that even with all my years of experienc...	slogan_jim	3	325	Mar 20, 2014 by PP
	NyQuil (Preview) First off I will admit I should not be checking up on the A. I have been back and forth to my house taking things out and I notice that he is drinking NyQuil. I understand I am powerless over him and alcohol...but I am dying to ask people here...would you count NyQuil as drinking alcohol??? It has alcohol in...	Newlife girl	9	2463	Mar 19, 2014 by Wisdom67
	Husband and Alcohol (Preview) This is my first time posting here... Married 11 years together for 17. I have 2 amazing kids. Husband is totally unreasonable...He goes out and drinks most nights, cannot even think of the last time he didn't. Comes home drunk, either passes out on the couch or comes up to bed and usually wakes me...	chadg	12	565	Mar 19, 2014 by jillybean1
	HP is Always Right... (Preview) I haven't posted for awhile, life has thrown me some curve balls and I forgot about step one, powerlessness. My mentally ill son was hospitalized for threatening suicide and more due to not taking his meds, and A was unbelievably supportive and non judgemental. Very strange, unexpected, and I feel g...	mm830	4	177	Mar 19, 2014 by WorkingThroughIt
	New to site (Preview) Hello, I am a family member of an alcoholic and new to this site, however, I am not sure if I am in the right place. I joined in at 9 PM, but from what I was reading the mtg usually begins reading of the Twelve Steps of Al-Anon. Is this something that I would do on my own or does someone conduct the meeting...	goldenchild1	2	165	Mar 19, 2014 by mm830
	He decides to clean the house AFTER we leave!! (Preview) This is bothering me...I moved out with our kids over a week ago. My AH has a lot of junk. Seriously. He is a hoarder. I have begged and pleaded with him to clean during the last 11 years of living together. He has finally decided to clean up AFtER we move out! How ironic. :( Maybe he has finally hit rock bott...	Newlife girl	9	433	Mar 19, 2014 by bud
	Al Anon Tools (Preview) I have heard people mention their "tool box" that they use to help them recover. I know reading the Al Anon literature is a tool, as is going to meetings. Can anyone share what other specific tools they use. Tools for serenity, detachment, coping, etc. Thank you	Starting Again	6	426	Mar 19, 2014 by mm830
	Just a little something that got my attention (Preview) Choose wisely who you give your energy to. Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.	PP	10	313	Mar 18, 2014 by bud
	Stress Overload - Please Help! (Preview) I am a Mother of 4, Grandmother of 6. I have a 36 yr. old non functioning alcoholic daughter. She has struggled with addictions since the age of 15, starting with crack-cocaine and alcohol, narcotics, methadone and now straight alcohol. She had 3 children, ages now 18, and 9 yr. old twin girls ( I have f...	NanaOfSix	9	447	Mar 18, 2014 by hotrod
	Thoughts (Preview) " There is no passion to be found in settling for a life that is less then the one you are capable of living." Nelson Mandela	Beatrice	5	286	Mar 18, 2014 by bud
	Right time to choose a sponsor? (Preview) Hi, I have only been with the program for just over a week but I am already wondering when is the right time to choose a sponsor??? I have only attended 2 face to face meetings but already feel the benefit of the program. Is it to early to be thinking about a sponsor?? I look forward to hearing from anyone wi...	southernlass	6	435	Mar 18, 2014 by neshema2
	Question (Preview) I have been away from Al Anon for about a year now. I attended for about year after I ended an engagement with an alcoholic, bipolar guy. It was great to get the support for awhile, but then I began to feel wrong about my sponsor, and stuck on the fourth step, and found meetings depressing the more I got t...	kdhmftexfiance	11	365	Mar 18, 2014 by WorkingThroughIt
	Update on Dad (Preview) Thank you all for your prayers and support since my Dad entered the hospital and then the SNF in January. At 3:40 this morning, he died. I was alone in his room with him. This past Sunday, he didn't want me to leave him and go back home. I knew it was because he wanted me to be with him when he died. I had to...	grateful2be	23	336	Mar 18, 2014 by ClearTheFog
	Worried tonight (Preview) Warning flags are popping up. After weeks of massive improvement, I'm afraid that he might be drinking again. Crappy mood, slight slurring of words, 'poor-me' party. Or, you know, he might just be in a crappy mood and I'm overthinking. Must not listen to the crazy-brain.	SpiderArcana	7	191	Mar 18, 2014 by SpiderArcana
	Today, I am surrounded by negativity (Preview) Hi - It's Robin, I am at work. I found some new ways to advertise and find mystery shoppers for our company. My co worker followed through by placing an ad in a Thrifty Nickel. I heard the owner say, "Don't hold your breath". This makes me angry. I am looking at my 4th step again. One of my defects...	mercedes1959	14	383	Mar 18, 2014 by mercedes1959
	I finally get it! (Preview) My ABF has been telling me on a monthly basis, "I don't now what I want, I was in a relationship like this for 14 years, I don't know if I want this". I realized what he meant was, when I complained, questioned or showed concern over his pills/cocaine/alchohol use - he leaves me! Huh...I did it a...	cmb	7	423	Mar 18, 2014 by grateful2be
	Change? (Preview) My A is an ex who I was with for five years. Love of my life but depleted my soul with his drinking. We split but he called this week promising to change and talks of marriage. Anyone want to share their experiences with me from similar situations?	Forgiveness82	8	808	Mar 18, 2014 by grateful2be
	seriously thinking of leaving (Preview) well i think this has been coming for awhile and as terrifying as it is, i think i am ready to be out of this alc marriage. i made mention to ah this morning that we need to talk . he quickyl was defensive and explosive and full.of blame to me . . screaming yelling. daughter crying. i stated WE ARE MISERABLE . ....	Theoceancalls	17	390	Mar 17, 2014 by grateful2be
	Family member with dt's in icu (Preview) 5 days ago my alcoholic sister was admitted to the hospital by her husband, who had no knowledge of her drinking, thinking she had some type of brain tumor or low blood sugar, denial can be very powerful. I had suspected she was drinking for about a month now, not knowing exactly how bad It had gotten, I c...	Worried72	4	391	Mar 17, 2014 by Worried72
	Guilt at walking away from alcoholic mother (Preview) Hiya. This is the first time I have posted. I have an alcoholic mother. Her drinking started when she emigrated to Canada from the U.K fifteen years ago. This also coincided with me (her only child) giving birth to her first grandchild. I have since had three further children. The last fifteen years ha...	samb	4	1184	Mar 17, 2014 by Debilyn
	I don't think I can live with him anymore, the love has been choked out (Preview) I have posted quite a lot over the last few days...I am certainly at a crossroads. I am considering moving out...going to see the place tomorrow, and ought to take it or I will be waiting for another to open up. My AH has been through rehab. I had left him shortly before that for the first time (only time)...	sadsusie	14	686	Mar 17, 2014 by neshema2
	still running (Preview) While living with my ex ah, I ran from the truth of our life, of my life in many things, books and studying, tv, internet, work, anything that distracted me from thinking things through, from being still and quiet and listening to my own soul. My first year in alanon, I spent my time facing it all, listeni...	el-cee	8	463	Mar 16, 2014 by el-cee
	Detachment - something I'm seeing deeper (Preview) Hi everyone Happy St Patricks Day yesterday at work (I do a form of customer service) a customer (about 30 years old) and her mother hurled insults at me. I guess they felt because they were paying me they could take out their anxiety on me. I had made a mistake that wasn't going to cost them any money and w...	WorkingThroughIt	7	475	Mar 16, 2014 by hotrod
	What leads an A to AA? (Preview) my AH has been white-knuckling sobriety for two months. Although I know it will not last I have to admit it has been a very blissful two months. It honestly felt like we were normal people for a while and I didn't have a ball of nerves in my stomach all the time. However i think the honeymoon period is over an...	tweety23	8	691	Mar 16, 2014 by Jen
	my first post (Preview) I have been lurking on this board for several years and had to finally delurk. I chose the name Starting Again because I feel like I am always starting over at step one. My husband is an alcoholic. That is hard for me to write. I found out 8 years ago when he told me. He was very good at hiding it. Over th...	Starting Again	14	542	Mar 16, 2014 by tiredtonite
	NEEED TO VENT (Preview) MY AH HAS VERY SINGLE TYPE OF LIE AND EXCUSE TO GET A DRINK. I COME HOME AND ALL HE WANTS IS MONEY FOR WHAT EVER HE MAKES A LIE FOR AND HE PROMISES ME TO COME HOME SO WE CAN HAVE OUR DATE NIGHT FRIDAY. SO HERE I AM HOME ALONE AND I DONT KNOW IF I CAN DO IT. I FEEL THAT IT TAKING ME DOWN WITH HIS DISEASE. BUT I NEED TO GO BAC...	NavySealWife	4	356	Mar 16, 2014 by ilovedogs
	AH got me pregnant - i need ESH from alanon (Preview) all of last year we were broken up and i was going to alanon and getting on a recovery path. i relapsed over the holidays and went over to his house, and he got me pregnant. I have 6 months until my due date. i moved in with him. he said we are back together again. the first month he drank and was crazy and o...	abell	6	498	Mar 15, 2014 by neshema2
	He's running out of options (Preview) I took a call from my son today - well actually it was a doctor who called from a hospital telling me my son was assaulted by someone in the rooming house where he's been living and wanted to reach out to me. He transferred the call and I spoke with my son. He told me he was beaten up, had some of his things stol...	Rose50	10	486	Mar 15, 2014 by neshema2
	Frustrated (Preview) Hey, I'm pretty new. Have had two meetings... I'm afraid I lost it tonight. I have been thinking of the art of letting go (what a relief not to feel guilty for doing things /for not doing things for not leaving /for not trying hard enough) This week I have been thinking of progress not perfection and als...	bora	6	419	Mar 15, 2014 by Chinook Daddy
	Alright so I blew up at him! (Preview) I again called exAH to let him know that my 16 year old wants to head back with him and my little one for her Spring break next week and well I could tell he was hanging. Once I realized he was probably drinking every night after work while I had our 5 year old and I just got so mad. I told him he is an idiot and that...	Breakingfree	10	415	Mar 15, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Good one, HP. (Preview) lol. I get a student allowance. And I'm extremely grateful for it. However the other day I received a phone call to tell me that my allowance had been cancelled as I had not attended an appointment. I called and was told that this was a mistake as I was a) not required to attend an appointment and b) my allow...	Melly1248	10	426	Mar 15, 2014 by maryjane
	The Up and The Down (Preview) My AH just got back from a business trip. He is being very nice and communicative. Ah yes, out of the ordinary at this point because he's been silent and derisive last week. I just needed a place to vent. I'm going to a meeting tonight, thankfully! I'm just so tired of the up and the down. One day he a...	ilovedogs	12	568	Mar 15, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Newbie (Preview) Hi all,My name is Marisa and my husband is an AH & NA. I found this website last night when my husband was drunk and raging out. I feel like Im walking on glass. I need help because my heart is heavy. I feel like I need someone to talk too thats been in my shoes or is wearing them. My husband has been drinkin...	Mari1988	5	471	Mar 15, 2014 by yanksfan51
	Going back on your boundaries (Preview) So My AH convinced me to give him a 2nd chance. He agreed to the following among other things 90 meetings in 90 days, if he were to miss a meeting he goes to two the next day. No drinking obviously. no lying. SO 1. He found some beer I had hidden and drank it. 2. lied and said that he "dumped it"...	sadsusie	8	427	Mar 15, 2014 by sadsusie
	STEP WORK BOARD (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t57030894/alanon-step-2/	hotrod	0	179	Mar 15, 2014 by hotrod
	Am I Crazy? (Preview) Hi Everyone I'm in a state I don't like. No I'm not having one bit of problem with my son but I used to be able to handle most anything that comes my way but lately that has changed. Example: I lost my doctor and hospital because of the insurance company not picking up the network. I went right into panic...	Cathyinaz	11	508	Mar 15, 2014 by Jerry F
	I am not having any FUN; rain rain go away (Preview) As usual on a rainy day I am not having fun! I haven't been able to kick up my heels & jump in some rain puddles. I am struggling w/ hurry & indesion. Can't spell either. I am trying not to stress over anything. I just want to slow down & take it all in. The rain doesn't usually bother me too much bu...	Hoot Nanny	2	343	Mar 14, 2014 by tiredtonite
	Finding humor in all the craziness (Preview) AH has been out of house for 7 months now. He avoids me at all costs with reasons like "If I see you I will want you" or "It is too hard on me to see you". Had a conversation with AH the other day and I have to say instead of letting his irrational thoughts get to me, I almost had to laug...	mongowal	2	270	Mar 14, 2014 by maryjane
	How long can you live with liver disease when you continue to drink??? (Preview) This may be like asking the length of a piece of string BUT how long can someone survive with serious liver disease while continuing to drink? My mum has severe ascites, no appetite, has lost over three stone in weight, very shaky, cold, has difficulty walking, gets very confused and makes up things t...	redred	7	353	Mar 14, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	Admitting - saying it aloud (Preview) Finally said it today in counseling, been weighing on me since my baby was born, just short of 6 weeks early, it's my fault she was premature. I was so stressed trying to keep it together, shield my son from the dysfunction of drunk dad, my anger at AH, and I had went away for a girl scrapbook weekend the wee...	Kerrymom	7	473	Mar 14, 2014 by el-cee
	My first Al-Anon meeting [in person] (Preview) I attended my first Al-Anon meeting yesterday in Canada. It was absolutely amazing. I was scared to attend but I left there feeling like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulder. Just a post of appreciation and gratitude.	Forgiveness82	5	313	Mar 14, 2014 by Hoot Nanny
	Do you mention when A does NOT drink? (Preview) Hey guys, quick question. When the A in your life chooses not to drink that day, do you bring it up in almost a "thank you for making that choice today" sort of way? Or is it better to just not mention it? Or is it better to just carry on as usual?	Akavanagh	10	426	Mar 14, 2014 by Beatrice
	Alcoholic Mum making things up... (Preview) Hello this is my first time on here. I have just returned from my Mums house. Its her Birthday. I brought cards and presents. The visit started well until she started rehashing things that happened in the past. Most of which she does not remember properly. She changes the stories and adds in load...	redred	7	390	Mar 14, 2014 by redred
	Fearing loss (Preview) Someone I have grown to care about got sick this week and landed in the hospital. It really threw me. Couldn't sleep for two nights. I have taken a good, long look at myself as a result. I am not afraid to die (I'm not wanting to die). What I really fear is loss. I fear loss so much so that for the last at l...	Lyne	3	284	Mar 14, 2014 by Forgiveness82
	to muffindog72 (Preview) thank you for the PM. i am not able to reply though as i always get an error message. i can receive the PMs though.and would love to e chat with you. if you are able, send me an email through pm and i will correspond with you via email. otherwise thank you. a kindred spirit you may be and our profession itself m...	Theoceancalls	9	455	Mar 14, 2014 by PP
	I'm in shock .. (it's a good thing) (Preview) Umm .. I don't even know where to start on this post .. I will be able to share more after today and I will try to get into my coffee shop to do so .. LOL. I had court on Monday and my atty is stating that there seems to be an urgency to end the divorce .. which is great .. however .. based upon what I know .. I may be th...	SerenityRUS	10	440	Mar 14, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	al anon in a nutshell…?? moving on new territory…need input! (Preview) hello MIP, well I'm still working my program far away from Al Anon meetings. But nevertheless I am changing my behaviors and attitudes through keeping up the work. And HP does it such ways, that here in my remote area, I also came across the issue of alcoholic disease and it's partner: co-dependence. N...	tortuga	2	361	Mar 13, 2014 by Jerry F
	Favourite Quotes.... (Preview) I stumbled across a new quote that is now among my "recovery" favorites.... "You don't have to attend every argument you're invited to." - Author Unknown.... I think that one speaks volumes, and it made me smile today. Tom p.s. My "favorites list" would now includ...	canadianguy	8	22156	Mar 13, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Oops he did it again, major consequences this time! (Preview) I have my little one for Spring break and I had to take her to the ER last night for a major bladder infection. This is the second one since he has had her, no history of this before. I called him to find out when she got off the last antibiotic and he sounded drunk and could not tell me what she was on and the las...	Breakingfree	13	572	Mar 13, 2014 by Debilyn
	Planning a professional intervention for my AM.. (Preview) If ya'll could please send some prayers/good thoughts my family's way I'd appreciate it..we have decided to do a professional intervention for my AM. It's in 03/30/2014. My dad, brother, sister & I already met once with the person my brother knows...we're meeting again this weekend..and in th...	phoenixmagicgirl	3	210	Mar 13, 2014 by Debilyn
	working the program (Preview) Another realisation I have had, thanks to a member of this fellowship is that this program takes serious committment. Setting boundaries of my own and living this program. Its not enough just to know it and think it. You have got to live it . I have not been living it fully, is it possible to live it fully?...	el-cee	5	648	Mar 13, 2014 by Jerry F
	haven't been on here... (Preview) I am not new to this site; I just haven't been on here for awhile. For those who don't know me, I have been coming to our local library to get on here for years. I am unable to even though I have a tablet been able to post. Long story: I can't seem to be comfortable on the chairs. I am on my knees right now. I am frus...	Hoot Nanny	3	203	Mar 13, 2014 by Debilyn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.