The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Just a small update. I haven't been posting a whole lot because...well, I guess I'm in "doing' mode just at the moment and I tend to get lost in words when I sit down and write. I log on daily and read everyone's ESH and love you all to pieces.
But anyway, I'm finding that my "doing" has changed in a really interesting (and absurdly simple) way.
The idea of "let go and let God" has been one I have really struggled with, because I've always wondered...well where is the line? At what point does this cease to work? I mean I'm hungry right now, but I'm pretty sure if I "let go and let God" I'm not suddenly going to have a belly full of nutritious food. I have to get up and make that myself, and eat it. I know that's an extreme and silly example but I was really struggling with the whole concept...if I don't fix this myself then I won't get what I need...where does one end and the other begin?
I've arrived at an interesting place. A combination of slogans to get me through each day, if you will. "Let go and let God" and "Do the next right thing". I'm finding that if I take all of the things running through my mind (what if this person does this, what if that person doesn't do that, how will I handle this situation, how am I going to make that happen) and "let go" of it all, and focus on "the next right thing" then life seems to flow pretty smoothly. The next right thing is usually pretty obvious (eat some food. Do some study. Walk the dog since he's sitting by the front door whining with his leash in his mouth. Turn off facebook if drunk friend keeps messaging me with stupid things about how much she neeeeeeeeeeds me right now. And when I'm stuck, I have a list of things to do for 5 minutes. Jump on the trampoline with daughter (she's always up for that), weed the garden, put away washing, read a book and so on. But anyway, I'm just living this completely new way of existing for me. So incredibly simple. Let go of the crazy fear and stress and desire to micro-manage the cosmos and focus on the next right thing. One foot in front of the other. And I'm having faith that the more I do this, the more things will turn out just fine, and life is really proving quite agreeable to this plan. More and more things go right; things become more managable the less I try to manage them. Curious, isn't it? It's kind of like learning to walk. One foot in front of the other.
So that's me, living a remarkably simple life right now and trying not to over-think things. I'm doing OK, steering my way out of my mess one step at a time.
But still here, and grateful to be a part of the family.
Couldn't agree more with you about doing the next right thing. That's my favorite slogan and serves me well and stops me from the racing what if thoughts and projecting into the future. Glad you're safe.
__________________
"Just being there for someone can sometimes bring hope when all seems hopeless." - Dave G. Llewellyn
Thanks for checking in Melly. You are quite right--it is in "doing "and not the talking abou--t that recovery occurs. One moment one step at a time we grow and begin to see life in a different fashion. I have read that when you are lost in the woods, it only takes 12 steps to find your way out.
Glad you are here
-- Edited by hotrod on Sunday 9th of March 2014 06:42:36 PM
Great share. I love let go and let god because I was so obsessive about my family and that one gave me freedom at the beginning. I love the slogans, im always saying, easy does it and this too shall pass. They have so much meaning. I relate to your title, learning to walk, just doing the next right thing, so simple. Im going to keep this close and practice it because I can drift into the future and the past and gst worked right up.x
Great post! Good job not getting sucked into the next piece of drama with your drunk friend.
I am just now reminded of a friend that runs a lot of marathons, and when people tell him it is amazing, he says "anybody can do it. You can do it. I just put one foot in front of the other. The only difference between you and me is that I keep putting one foot in front of the other, and you quit".
So glad to see an update from you! Keeping it simple and let go and Let God have helped me through lots. Sending you lots of love and support on your journey!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
This reminds me of an encounter I had with a random stranger once. It was winter, we had snow, and I was shoveling the driveway. It happened to be sunny out for once, and Random Stranger was on a walk around the neighborhood. He saw me shoveling and said to me, 'You know, God is going to take care of that for you, right? The sun is out!' Lots and lots of non-logic in that statement (it's still cold, just because it's sunny doesn't mean it's warm enough to melt snow; I have somewhere to be in a hour, it's going to take a wee mite longer for God to take care of the snow in my driveway; etc) that left me a bit flummoxed. He just kept smiling an looking at me, so I finally said, 'God helps those who help themselves.'
So, just let HP take care of the things that are out of your control. Everything else that you can change, go for it.
Oh, and wear headphones when you shovel your driveway. Sheesh.
