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Freedom
(Preview)
Last thanksgiving I spent weeks preparing to cook a meal for people who could have cared less. Of course they expected it since I have always worn my heart on my sleeve. None of them thanked me, praised any specific part of the meal or even took into account what effort it was. This year I have been freed...
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maresie
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3
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584
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Just need to vent
(Preview)
Just feeling wretched. I have had a long, stressful day at work. I have been in a meeting with managers who need to save money and "lose" some staff (I am a Workplace Trade Union Rep which means I do a full time job as well as all the Union work) The meeting was all doom and gloom - no money - need to s...
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Tattyhead
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5
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983
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HOARDING!
(Preview)
I am finding that more & more I have symptoms of hoarding! I think I mentioned this before a while back. I was going through my disorganized back room this morning looking for my address book & finally found it. But..in the meantime I made matters a lot worse by going through almost everythi...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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1687
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Tired of the rollercoaster of emotions
(Preview)
I'm so tired of being sad, I try with all my might to let go and let God...but it's soooo hard. I've been with my AH for 20 years!!! and I can't just let it go...I just can't. I want to stop focusing on him and move forward, but its so hard for me..... He left me during a drinking binge in August and moved in wit...
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sdisnie
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7
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933
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Practice these principles in all my affairs...
(Preview)
LOL...of course once I started practicing the principles of the program the number of affairs I was envolved in dropped to zero. I kept the one I started with HP and the one I started with myself. So what the heck has Mr. Crazy been up to for a week or so? I really missed you brothers and sisters!!!! ...
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Jerry F
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11
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960
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Lead me, Guide me, Walk beside me..............My story........
(Preview)
Was looking at a Christmas catalogue today and saw that quote "Lead me, Guide me, Walk beside me" It really stuck with me throughout the day. I realized after the AlAnon convention that my life and my recovery was not what I had thought it was. I had thought that my "qualifer" for...
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shellyj123
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5
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1408
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Holiday issues
(Preview)
I do indeed have serious issues with the holidays in general. I had a counselor for a while this year who was pushing my boundaries. Out of the blue she said she was leaving to go to a new assignment just before the holidays. My best laid plans being scattered. I really tried to get another one to get me...
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maresie
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5
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751
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Help in Choosing a Counselor
(Preview)
Hello, all, I'm new here but not new to Al Anon. Have read lots of your posts, and my story is just like everyone else's in so many ways. 17 years married to AH, second marriage for me, third for him. He has two adult children, I have none. We're older -- in our early 60's now, and I am financially depende...
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essgee1952
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10
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972
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Need to detach
(Preview)
I really need to try to detach from my 'estranged' AH....I have to for my sanity and to give myself 100% to my kids. I'm tired of every inch of my mind being consumed with the AH. I need my power back, but I don't know how to get it back. I know people who have been divorced from a relationship for years, and...
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sdisnie
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5
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1259
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Bad thoughts....
(Preview)
Today I dont feel like I'm going to make it through the holidays..... Last night I started to get really depressed, thinking about how I never would have thought last Thanksgiving/Christmas that this year my AH would be living with another woman and her kids..... Today the kids have all the Christmas...
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sdisnie
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12
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1287
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Thanks for your prayers and suggestions Keep praying please
(Preview)
Thanks to all who responded and/or prayed for my son in my previous post !!!! I took one suggestion and contacted the Salvation Army Rehab Program. Gave them a quick history of my son's addiction and legal troubles. And they are willing to consider him for treatment. Got the application this week and s...
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xeno59
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10
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784
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guidance
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I knew to this board and the program. I am hoping someone can give me some guidance. My brother has been struggling with addiction for about 3 yrs now. Last year after losing his job and being in deeply in debt he agreed to go into rehab again (2nd time that my parents paid for). He went to a grea...
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smokey28
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4
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718
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By way of introduction...
(Preview)
Hello and thanks for reading my post. By way of introduction, I wanted to say that my situation is probably not unique, but isn't that common. My loved one is someone who is an odd mix of family, friend and lover. We met three years ago and became friends while I had a romantic partner. We became involved r...
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LearningTheRopes
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12
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949
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scared
(Preview)
I sent my ABF a text today saying ring me, I wanted the money he said he would drop off and never. Turned his phone off this weekend again we all know what this means. Yesterday I felt better thought I carnt change him, he is ill, I dont want this in my life. He rand me on my way home from work today I was not p...
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Tracy
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2
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751
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1 Year Anniversary Good & Bad feelings
(Preview)
My AS hit rock bottom this time last year (of course we thought he hit rock bottom many times before). Oct, Nov, Dec of 2008 horrible awful for son and our family. Ashamed that I was wishing that he would die just so his terribile pain would end. He did embrace recovery in Feb and has been working at earn...
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luvinmom
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3
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811
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Progression
(Preview)
I posted here this weekend, my ABF's brother was diagnosed with lung cancer and things have been going down hill for my abf since. I just found a 24oz beer in a brown bag in his truck tool box, I was actually in there looking for a small screwdriver. This means he is not only drinking on the weekend but dri...
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Holly09
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4
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748
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Leave vs. Stay, Strong vs Weak, etc.
(Preview)
Hi all... this is a posting from Toby Rice Drews (author of the Getting Them Sober books), reprinted with her permission, regarding the potential for sending the wrong messages when we say well meaning phrases like "stay strong", particularly with respect to the major "stay vs. l...
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canadianguy
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8
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1087
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AN ALMOST STRESS-FREE THANKSGIVING!
(Preview)
I had an almost stress-free thanksgiving yesterday! My mom was there: we all got along & the food was good--what more could I ask for? This year has been rough at times but I have so much to be grateful for! I know that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel when it gets really bad. I know that the ba...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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473
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What to do now?
(Preview)
My fully story is on another post, but I wanted to seek targeted assistance with this question: What to do after confronting someone incorrectly? I've been reading and starting to understand that I should not try to change my a-ex but rather set clear boundaries for myself. However, a few days ago, I b...
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LearningTheRopes
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9
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871
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Help: Confused By A
(Preview)
Hiya Guys To cut a long story short, one of the A's that used to be in my life {ten years sober}, after no contact in the last eighteen months and the end of a relationship almost three years ago. Is confusing me {ok you are allowed to laugh at that comment lol}. I've been growing in many things in my life and o...
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ally
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7
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843
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11/1/09 MIP Chat Room Group Business Meeting Minutes
(Preview)
11/1/09 MIP Chat Room Group Business Meeting Minutes Courage opened the Meeting 9PM (EST) with The Serenity Prayer Motion was held, accepted and passed for Octobers Meeting Minutes as presented on the message board. Old Business A.Current Chair Schedule is as follows: AMMon. - Shimo/No altT...
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tea2
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0
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770
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Chat
(Preview)
Hi everyone I haven't been here in a while mostly because I have had trouble getting into chat can anyone help me ??????
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mum2leahnjosh
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2
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804
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The "Legal" Consequences of Living w/AH
(Preview)
This post is regarding the legal consequences of drinking and driving. My AH got his first DUI in 2004. He hired a skilled laywer and got off on a "wet reckless" because his BAC was .08. So in essence, his charge was reduced. But this reduced charge remains on his current record, despi...
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GailMichelle
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10
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1058
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WISHING ALL OF YOU A HAPPY THANKSGIVING
(Preview)
((((((friends)))))), I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving today....here's hoping we can all focus on the positive in our lives and remember what we have to be thankful for... Love ya, Andrea
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Andrea12
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3
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711
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December Business Meeting Agenda
(Preview)
Business meeting Sunday, December 5 Agenda: Review of November minutes Review of OP meeting schedule Old Business Voting on new OP Laison Committee member New Business Closing with the Lord's Prayer Listing MIP with WSO Reinstating monthly OP meetings Please pm me if you have any additional items...
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Courage
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1
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553
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Thanksgiving
(Preview)
Just wanted to say happy thanksgiving to everyone , and I hope my x is haveing a good thanksgiving also , this is the first year I will be alone for thanksgiving in several years , just depressed , but I guess I'll get over it , I always have , but it bits being alone , I wish I could take back my x but , I can't go th...
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john boy
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5
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555
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Happy Thanksgiving
(Preview)
Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving! I hope everyone eats too much and laughs a lot! Holly
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Holly09
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1
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569
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We're sneaking up quickly....
(Preview)
on the 6000th member of MIP. That's amazing! And it speaks volumes of the value of this site. Happy holidays all! Diva
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Diva
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1
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508
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I did it! Said those 5 little words
(Preview)
"Will you be my sponsor? And she said yes! I am so glad, and proud of myself for just doing it, as I have been agonizing over it for a while. It is someone who has inspired me and encouraged me since my very first meetings. I find that she is the one I always look for at a meeting and she is so sincere and g...
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cdngirl
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10
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2489
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Thanks karilyn and Pipers Kitty!
(Preview)
Dear Karilyn, I want to thank you dear friend for all of your loving reminders (and those of others also!) to "take care of us" by getting regular mammograms, pap smears, and dental exams. When caught up in all of the drama of the A, years ago, all I could do in Alanon was vent, it was all about ge...
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ThisIsBlythe
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2
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409
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Why I Am Making the Choice to Divorce
(Preview)
I'm posting to possibly help others or at least perhaps one person. I'm not seeking anything else at this point. I began coming to this board in the summer of 2007, under the name "Stormie." At the time, I had filed a dissolution of marriage and moved out of our home. 8 months later, I re...
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GailMichelle
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8
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1314
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Cat, motor oil & water don't mix!
(Preview)
(((((Family))), Giving a cat a bath any time is not a happy fun time. However when you have a Pipers Kitty who trots through the door and her back is full of grease.....well let's just say the Serenity Prayers over and over again. I gave her a bath yesterday along with a Fancy Feast to say "I'm sorry...
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Karilynn
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5
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811
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As Thanksgiving Nears
(Preview)
((((Hello Friends)))))))), As Thanksgiving nears it is a time to be grateful for what we have...sometimes that can be hard. It can be hard to get past the pain of remembering the one's we lost. One of my best friends lost her son a year ago on Thanksgiving Day he was just 25 yrs young he had cystic fibro...
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Andrea12
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6
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845
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Lois W Movie
(Preview)
I'm not sure if anyone has posted this or not, but I heard about it at my meeting yesterday and then my Dad e-mailed me the following information: Winona Ryder 'Enough' for Hallmark Barry Pepper to co-star in 'Lois Wilson Story' By MICHAEL SCHNEIDER Winona Ryder and Barry Pepper have been cast to star i...
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N8SMOM
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5
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1570
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reliving the death of a relationship
(Preview)
One of my neighbors is reaching a bottom of sorts. She is behaving much like the ex A did when he reached a sort of bottom, I thnk there were many more after that. She blames everyone else in the world for her issues, projects all her issues over others and feels like a victim. When the ex A was doing that a...
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maresie
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8
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959
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Brick by Brick the walls go up
(Preview)
I am new here. I came here because I need help. My heart is slowly breaking and I find myself putting up walls that I do not want erected. The more my ABF throws bricks at me the larger the wall becomes. This is not the life I want. I am the daughter of an alcoholic. He created havoc in our lives as children and m...
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FuzzyLogic
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7
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957
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One more step
(Preview)
Well he came and got his stuff went ok until the end when he took a shot at me and I gave him a slam back. Oh well, it's over. Still a lot left of today and I think I will sweep my patio it's covered with leaves and stuff from a storm yesterday. Hope it will make me feel like I moved forward. Amen, fishinmama
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fishinmama
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1
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572
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Prayers Please
(Preview)
Hi family, As many of you know I am at the beginning of divorcing my husband. This is something I feel is right for me and as much as it hurts, I want this. Well he told me last night that he is leaving the state Wednesday and isn't planning on coming back. I am so mad at him for this. In order for the divorce to be...
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Mandy123
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10
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523
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ESH - Good News, Asking for help
(Preview)
I haven't been as active as I'd like on here, and thank you to people who have been supportive to me so far. I thought I'd share some ESH on Asking for Help: Q. Unfortunately, Al Anon where I live is going through some tough times - politics, control, fighting, not following traditions...*I asked for hel...
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alanonicScotland
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3
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799
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Well apparently I didn't have long to wait.
(Preview)
My wife just got a DUI about half an hour ago. She managed to call me, so I went to the scene. Convinced them to just leave her car there since it was legally parked. Guess I'll probably be picking her up at the station in about an hour. I hope she doesn't refuse the breathalyzer. I had really hoped she w...
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FlyingSquirrel
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6
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541
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don't think alcoholic is taking his meds...need some serenity
(Preview)
My recovering alcoholic husband is very down in the dumps today. I am wondering if he is taking his medication. Haven't asked because I am afraid that he might react in an angry way. Either he is taking it and it isn't really helping him or he isn't taking it. I can't make him take the medicine. He is a...
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supermom
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3
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683
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Down N Back up...
(Preview)
Hi MIP Family :) What a last 3 days, I am Woop'd Yet can't sleep, so here I am... I have some examples of my Downs: Son about got head takin off by a soccer ball Lost the game Grandma Still in the Hospital, Uncle Still in Hospital Missed My Boy... :o) Brother & Sis Still not talking to each other Niece dati...
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Jozie
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3
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712
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Multi-Woman saves the day!!! What superhero would you be?
(Preview)
I was on the pc yesterday while my son was in the other room watching Fenius and Ferb, a children's cartoon show. and was listening to the show from my comfy pc chair. I was literally amazed at it. The whole jist of the show was What Super hero would you be and what would be your powers? etc.........Then th...
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shellyj123
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4
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799
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a test of serenity
(Preview)
hello room, Today the ex boyfriend is coming to get the things of his that are still at my house. I am needless to say anxious. I hope I can conduct myself in a way that is in step with my hp. No finger pointing, no mention of new gf or marriage. Make the spilt. I am trying to remember the good and the painf...
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fishinmama
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2
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826
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He wants to meet
(Preview)
My ABF has slipped over the past couple of weeks (after 6 months sober)after the death of his 5 month old nephew. Last weekend he went missing and never got in touch then a couple of days ago I had to get in touch because my daughter needed her phone which he had. He said he was trying to sort himself out was...
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Tracy
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6
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825
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How do I find a sponsor
(Preview)
I am new to Alanon - I just went to my first meeting last week, second meeting this week. I really feel like I need a sponsor ASAP, but I have only attended two meetings. They say you are to find someone who you want to ASK to be your sponsor but I don't know any of the members well enough, or even how long they ha...
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jasobel
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3
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1903
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First FTF meeting and a terrible night
(Preview)
I went to my first meeting yesterday and it's ironic that what I went home to afterwards was a nightmare. I liked it and will keep going back. Unfortunately, I can't afford the literature so I'll just have to listen and do online readings for now. Literature can come later, right? AFiance was drunk...
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Ragdolls
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7
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646
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Protecting my kids with sanity (I hope!)
(Preview)
My sober exAH's g/f is an A, supposedly sober. My 16 yr old son once described her kind of in a quandry, as "more like someone I go to school with than an adult" and has said that he sees the relationship his dad has with her as "not something that will last; more like a highschool romance&...
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Loupiness
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3
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618
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Another lesson on listening to HP
(Preview)
Hello ((((Family)))) Soooo, tonight, like just about every other Thursday night for the last 5 years and 7 months, I set out to attend my out-of-town Al-Anon meeting. This meeting is about an hour drive from my home. At the halfway point of this drive I pass through a small town that has an "at-g...
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david62
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10
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946
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gone again
(Preview)
Hi My ABF never contacted me yesterday with money or phone I got on wiyth my day but could nt help ringing his phone before I went to bed last night it was off so looks like he has gone on bender again with the money. Hes going right back to where he was before his 6 months sobriety. I am healthiers today and I...
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Tracy
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1
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691
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Feelin' better about today!
(Preview)
I am feeling better about going to the gratitude banquet tonight although it is going to be a long day & I am tired. Yesterday I posted about my A taking his fellow A to the train station. I feel differently today about it. I just realized that he was doing someone a huge favor & that I needed to let...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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675
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Difficult detachment
(Preview)
Hi MIP family, I thought it would be a good idea to post here tonight. I'm looking for some ESH and maybe for my HP to give me a clue on this question. For background, many of you know that I am with an active AH. We've been together a long time (> 25 years all told) and have a teenage son. We originally came t...
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Rocky38
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7
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1901
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Am I nuts?
(Preview)
Hello alanon family. New here and I am truly qualified . I have been in a relationship with an alcoholic for 4 years, had been married to an addict, folks were alcoholic, brother alcohlic/addict. I am very familar with alanon, but got cured and left for awhile. I have read your board here for the l...
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fishinmama
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7
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828
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Why does it still bother me?
(Preview)
Hello Everyone! Why does it still bother me that my husband can't be there for me? I know that when we put expectations on someone other than GOD we are let down. I don't think its expectations, I think its hope or wishes. What's the difference? I dunno sometimes. I've set a boundary and asked him to lea...
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Sincerely
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5
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1163
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One step forward...two steps back
(Preview)
I'm so tired of always seeming to take a step forward and feeling pretty decent to then taking two steps back. I feel I never make any progress!! I know that I can't just get over my AH overnight, but I'm tired of feeling sad and thinking about it. Sometimes I hate my brain and wish I could get some shock t...
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sdisnie
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3
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778
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Selfishness
(Preview)
My A partner has honed selfishness into a fine art. I know, I know. All of them are selfish; of this I have no doubt. But you would think that one who went on a binge, boarded an airplane for London, stayed a week in the Dorchester Hotel there and had the nerve to come back, would be just a bit contrite. Af...
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Diva
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8
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774
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Choosing Recovery
(Preview)
Hi all, I think I will continue to be amazed at the power this program can have on a person. I had a hard time seeing it in the past becuase my "A" insisted that Al-anon was not working for me. I didn't realize then that validation was needed, but it was. Now I am getting validation from all sorts o...
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Mandy123
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3
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801
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prayers needed please
(Preview)
(((((((((Family))))))))) I know I haven't been around much and when I do come around I seem quite...I do apologize for this but I have had a lot going on in my life. I am going in for major surgery on Dec 2 and am scared to death. I believe in the power of prayer and I am asking those of you that pray to please ad...
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shadow1
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14
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660
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Feeling Guilty
(Preview)
I know it is a choice and I don't want to feel guilty - I think it is the hardest emotion for me to control. My AH has offered up what he feels he can do to save the marriage. I have been through this before and of course, I don't have faith. Nor, does it change how I feel about him or our marriage. I didn't ask him t...
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Dini
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4
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574
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Trusting your higher power
(Preview)
Please help me work through this. I have a very deep spiritual base in my life. I have always communicated with my HP on a regular basis as my best friend, confidant and advisor. My Alcoholic Ex left me three weeks ago and I am having a very hard time now questioning how a higher power who loves me would take...
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jasobel
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11
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801
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