Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

faith432 · faith432

Well I am new to the message board and to Al-Anon. I have been married to my A not alcoholic but ADDICT!!! He could be an alcoholic but his preference ...the preference that has ruined our life is CRACK. My A was clean and sober for 10 1/2 years 1994-2005. He gained his sobriety by accepting Jesus as hi...

QOD · QOD

It has been a really really long time since I have posted here. Life has been rolling along for me. I have been taking my ups and downs pretty well I think. Let's see, to sum things up: My exAH and I have been back to dating since Oct 2008. He lives with his grandma & I live in my house with our kids whom...

Nodaybut2day · Nodaybut2day

Hi all, I'm writing this because I have doubts about whether or not my X is actually an alcoholic or just an "alcohol abuser", as in someone who drinks heavily or moderately depending on the situation, but who is able to stop at some point. The reason I ask is because lately, since I have left m...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So the ex AH has been staying on the upstairs couch for about 6 weeks now. I have had another issue with oldest daughter who will probably be going to wilderness camp within the next 2 months and because of that position I cannot in good conscience rely on her to take care of her younger brother and siste...

ally · ally

Guys As i continue to grow and find a new confidence in myself in ways i never believed possible. Life is what i'm finally allowing it to be for me. I'm not overly confident. I'm very easy going, down to earth and i love to laugh and make others laugh too. People call me the likes of "crazygirl or n...

Gailey · Gailey

I was not going to go to my meeting last night as I sat in my recliner with snuggly pjs on in front of my Christmas tree. I hate to go back out when I get home from work but this has been a very trying week for me with the A son and a lot of other things. I thought to myself...how can I keep tring to urge my son to go to m...

KellyCO · KellyCO

Hello to everyone - I have been going to a great weekly Al-Anon meeting for 9 months but am new to this forum. I would love to hear from anyone with ideas about how to talk to my kids about their father's alcoholism. My daughter is 10 and my son just turned 8. I only learned of my husband's chronic drinking...

mc3 · mc3

This is a strange question coming from a child of an A. My mother left him because of his drinking but I was to young to remember what he was like then. I am 37 and just in the past few years getting to know my father. I moved closer to him to build a realationship with him. He was forced to stop drinking for h...

gknee · gknee

Hi MIP gang- tonight I did a little personal history lesson and read ovey the posts I started since I joined MIP. WOW! Eye opening. It gives actual dates to the lurid details of life with my addict husband. I actually still loved him back 4 years ago..... So this next detail I could have cut and pasted from...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi everyone, wow living in reality is tough. My ABF has had a slip after 6 months and is living back in his mums. We are having contact via the phone. He is very upet, angrey, wollowing in self pity. it was his birthday couple of days ago I took a small present and card to his mums. He asked me to call back a...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), I am asking for prayers for the family of Richard Antoun. He was an anthropology professor that was stabbed to death yesterday in his office. He was 77 years young. He had more energy at that age than 100 of me combined. A sweet, gentle kind man who life touched many. I found out at...

shadow1 · shadow1

((((Family)))) I just wanted to say a great big THANK YOU for all your support, thoughts and prayers. I'm home from the hospital and doing well..... A bit tired but over all much better than I expected Take care Kim/Shadow

Tracy · Tracy

I really need to have strenght to be couragoues to take care of me for the first time in my life rather than everyone else. People have told me in the past that my kindness is my weakness. I do tend to understand another pain and then go into the fix it mode. However I have learnt from Al anon that we are a...

Dyinginside · Dyinginside

Hi everyone, I'm new to this site. I'll make a long story short. I've been with my BF for 5 yrs. We don't live together. The 5 yrs have been very volatile to say the least. I could not for the life of me understand why our relationship was so up and down. My BF drank, but he was never a fall down drinker or a class...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

Dear Friends, I am feeling quite sad lately, crying a lot. Next week is my wedding anniversary, my sixteenth. For all of the first fifteen years we were married, my husband was a horribly hard drinking serious A. I am not talking weekend binges, I am talking daily drunkenness to the point of blackout...

maresie · maresie

I have a new therapist now and our first session went pretty well. I have a full three sessions before Christmas to get started on some topics. I am now having to take a lot of responsibility for permitting the last therapist to cross significant boundaries. I know I can go into people pleasing at the d...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Saying Relapse is part of being an addict, is true. It does not have to mean the addict is using again, they can also relapse into addictive behavior, which sadly almost always ends up with the addict using again. Relapse is a processs. The addict who has had a strong program for many years, starts to not...

RLC · RLC

To all my MIP family, I would like to inform you that my brother Ray loss his 6 month battle with cancer this past Thrusday. He fought a brave battle which was no surprise to me. He was given a military funeral and buried Saturday in the town where he and I were raised, Newton, Mississippi. Th...

Wife of A · Wife of A

Hi there I'm new here. I just don't know what to do. I have reached out to Al-anon before in terms of finding info. Right now, I feel like crap. I think my hubby is an A. Well, I know he has a problem. But he's a functioning one. In any case, I found his drinking to be a big problem. He would drink himself stupid e...

glad · glad

It just recently dawned on me, not sure why now. That during the first few years of our relationship anytime I would bring up a subject of intimate discussion- you know those conversations that most "normal" couples just have as they get to know eachother, beliefs, values and feelings- we...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Hi gang! Had a couple of rough days here. Struggling with making sense of my thoughts. I go from over thinking about the drinker in my life. Almost fantasy thinking, where nothing was bad in the relationship. Only thinking of the good times. At these times I am heart sick. Went I shake myself and t...

wifeofalcoholic · wifeofalcoholic

Her it is Saturday night. I worked hard all day. My husband was supposed to make dinner for me (his turn). I got home, said Hello, ....no answer. He was asleep on the recliner. (not a good sign - no dinner and asleep) I could tell by his speech that he had a small amount to drink. Some nights are much wo...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

First of all I'd like to thank Jozie and all of the prayers that were sent out for me on Friday....This is an amazing group of people and an amazing place. As those of you who follow my posts know, I have been stressing for weeks over the pre-surgery tests I had to have Friday. I don't have all the test resul...

cidiera · cidiera

I am facing a very hard decision. I've been with a man that I love very much for a little over 3 years, now. He has a problem with taking pain medicine, and it has escalated since I've met him. He's gone from taking one low dose vicodin every couple of months when I first met him to snorting 40 miligram per...

sdisnie · sdisnie

I'm just curious if anyone has ever experienced with the A in their life a way that they finally were able to control their drinking? For instance, say that the drinking was always out of control, affecting eveything, and then the got to a point to where they were able to drink and not get out of control an...

lolli09 · lolli09

Hi all, this is my situation. Me - 23 yrs sober AA, 15 yrs Alanon. He 15 yrs sober. We have been in relationship for 3 years, have had some fantastic times together... even a trip to Europe this summer. He has his home, I have mine. We live mostly independent lives, not glued at the hip but we have never...

ditto · ditto

Im not sure how I should have handled this situation. At the invitation of a client, I went to her house for a business meeting. The meeting concerned certain aspects of her house, so it is necessary for us to meet there to review items she wants. I have been to her home a number of times in the past and hav...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi all.... just wanted to let you all know that for the first time ever, I wrote out Christmas cards to the 13 fellows per John's list that he posted on here a couple of days ago.... It "cost me" two hours of time, plus 13 cards & stamps. The benefits outweigh the costs, as I felt wonderfu...

Diva · Diva

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Dr Seuss. This quote appears at the bottom of Canadianguy's posts and responses. I agree wholeheartedly. Diva

Misshopeful · Misshopeful

Hi everyone, Not sure what to write here but I know I've got to try something or I may just lose my mind! Once again I've done what I "feel" is right and asked my A to leave. So here I am alone, again with a little less hope than last time but not ready/willing to let go. Today someone told me he will n...

Jozie · Jozie

I have a favor to ask all of MIP... As most of you know shelly123 has been having some health issues, pretty serious stuff... Well today she is at the Docs gettin some test run and they currantly found more problems. All I ask is that ALL of you take the time to say a Little Prayer for her, she has alot on her p...

jasobel · jasobel

My boyfriend who left me for 3 weeks due to a relapse (who was sober for 9 months) was with another woman. Now he is back with me and sober again - back to AA meetings nightly. I am dealing with all of the emotions except the obsession over him returning to this other woman. He said he didn't love her. She is an...

John · John

Please add the two additional people below, who have just entered the MIP recovery houses to your holiday card list. The houses are now full so there will be no other new names coming out after this. New Residents; Bobby S. 413 Strada St. Wilmington, NC 28409 and Adam M. 2704 Oleander Dr. Wilmingto...

Nodaybut2day · Nodaybut2day

Ok, I'm confused. Since we have gone to mediation twice, and since having "a talk", my X is behaving very strangely, as in, he's actually behaving "nicely". I really don't know what to make of it. We had 1 visit with him last week-end that went well. My stepson wasn't there (I have...

maresie · maresie

I seem to be on a new level of grief about the ex A and my relationship with him. The more I look at it the more I see all his crises, health problems ( of course his trumped mine no matter what), work problems, car issues, family issues were power and control mechanisms. There is no question he always had t...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

I started 2 post over the past week. I got a lot of support, understanding, and hopefully, it helped some. Considering my situation (divorce is pending) I feel as though that I'm doing okay. That is, my foundation is pretty solid, even though my life situation is pretty bleak at the moment. But I sti...

fishinmama · fishinmama

ok I know my focus should be elsewhere, but I have just been reading past posts and notice how many a's hook up with another woman/man right after separating from the somene they have been in a relationship with. How can they move on so quickly. Is it because they follow the path of least resistance? W...

lacewing · lacewing

Hello all, I am asking my fellow Al-Anoners to please consider offering up some much needed prayers for another al-anoner, who is having quadruple bypass tomorrow afternoon. He and I have been conversing by way of Yahoo Messenger for the past 4 days. I am doing my best to keep him occupied as well as k...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am trying very hard to hang in there! It has been a rough road but I am still here. I have struggled with my sanity for almost 24 years & that happens to be how long since I went to my first meeting--one month to go. For all of you who haven't been with us long: there is hope! If I can make it this long &...

Misshopeful · Misshopeful

Hi! I have a question...although I realize it may be different from person to person I can't help wondering: what has worked best for most people with A spouses, is it better to be supportive and kind toward them, or is it better to "detach" yourself and express the pain and anger we feel? I'm...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

(((((((((((My Dear Friends)), Thank you for all the wonderful responses to my post....it helped me so very much.....I found the strength to pick myself up and get those decorations up....and It made me feel much better.......and my g=daughter can look out the window and see Santa now..lol.... For...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

As some of you here and others have reminded me "Why are you taking on this search and not him". I knew full well I needed to keep backing off and let him be responsible for what comes next. You know when that mom thing kicks in your heart takes over your brain. LOL So I backed off and lo and beh...

Debilyn · Debilyn

It is my esh that we don't. What I have felt and see on our mip board is, we come to a place where we are comfortable with having love for that sick person and knowing it is the disease we hate and blame all the hurt on. This does not mean we will keep that "in love" type feeling. For me it was I was han...

Leelee · Leelee

Hi there everyone. I am new to this outlet - have participated in Alanon in the past but stopped going when I thought my hubby stopped drinking "too much" - isn't that a hoot? I have been wondering why in the world I would want to stay with my husband. I am going to seek spiritual direction fr...

angel66 · angel66

Hi Everyone, I'm back after being off of the board for about a year. I guess things calmed down w/ my AH but recently my life has been pure CHAOS ! Today I'm taking my 13 yr old daughter to see a psychologist b/c she is so stressed due to his increased drinking and the family dynamics. I feel sick that I hav...

Jozie · Jozie

Hey All... As most of you know, the month of Nov is a tough one for me, My AFather died that month, has a birthday that month, and pasted on Thanksgiving..So Yeah.. Rough Month, and THIS Year was the first whole year since he pasted...1st birthday in Heaven... However... i think Oct. was harder, only be...

Ragdolls · Ragdolls

AFiance called me while I was at work and he was walking 2.5 mi to the emergency room to check himself into the psych ward. We talked when he got there just to check in. I called the hospital last night to make sure he was there and was safe. I'm just full of sadness. I love him so much and I just keep hoping t...

Dale · Dale

Hey all, kim is out of surgery, I haven't spoken to her yet but she is doing ok, more to follow Dale

Ragdolls · Ragdolls

AFiance had court today and didn't want me to go with him because he was ashamed. Last night was terrible! He was panicking and rambling and seemed like he was still drunk from the day before. Who knows? I woke up at 3 AM and he wasn't in bed. I called him (lazy me) and he was sleeping on the couch. I get...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((((((hello friends)))))))), I don't know when it gets easier, the holidays are an espically hard time for me...I haven't decorated the outside of my home since husband died....yesterday i decided it was time to move forward.....i do have a 17 month old g-daughter and I Know she would enjoy the de...

fishinmama · fishinmama

As I mentioned before, I was an alanon member in the past. I guess I thought I was cured and walked away from alanon and hooked up with a man who is an alcoholic. I am attracted to them like a magnet. Things had it's usual meltdown and now we are done. I hurt and know that alanon is there for the taking but I...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I find myself today in a place that I can not seem to get myself out of, and Im not sure why. I am schedule for surgery on December the 18th and it has me feeling completely off in every direction. Now I have had 3 prior surgeries on different things and have always made it out ok. Other than the last time, t...

Rora · Rora

I've been lurking a lot lately. Not posting much. I've felt I've needed to take a back seat and try to listen and learn. My life is changing. After 13 months of physical separation I've come to understand that my marriage to my ex-aH is over. There are many reasons why, that would be too lengthy and to...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I'm going to be brief... Well I'm going to try.... :) Had another altercation with oldest daughter yesterday morning and police were called. I am going to work to get her into a group home or wilderness camp before it's too late (sorry Debilyn). I am at the end of the line with her and all the counseling...

cassidy2010 · cassidy2010

Well we made it through Thanksgiving without any problems.My A was really easy to get along with this year.I could almost faint. He still drinking but slowed down some and I noticed a change .I guess I'm always in fear of the calm before the storm.Kinda like ,okay this is going great but for how long ? I...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Did I miss an update or anything??? thank you. love,debilyn

edmond · edmond

http://reverbnation.com/tunepak/2042171

fishinmama · fishinmama

well I got to the box at the bottom of the closet only to find that they were not my alanon books but aa books of my sons. I decided to go ahead and read step one from the aa 12 X 12. Not much difference from alanon. Then I got out a piece of paper and wrote down the actions I had taken in the last few months to co...

Peace101 · Peace101

Hi Folks, I have been lurking on this website off and on for a couple of years and finally decided I better start posting! First, I would like to thank everyone both past and present who post and share and just have helped me relate to what I have been going thru. It was here that I learned how to detach fr...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

Many of you know me by my story in the Forum. Well the son in program went back out and is now in Detox at the Veteran's Hospital. They recommended Celebrate Recovery for him but I contacted them and they want $40,000 for 90 days. Can someone tell me what drug addict or alcoholic has that kind of money? T...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	New to admitting I am co-dependant...WHAT!!!REALLY!!! (Preview) Well I am new to the message board and to Al-Anon. I have been married to my A not alcoholic but ADDICT!!! He could be an alcoholic but his preference ...the preference that has ruined our life is CRACK. My A was clean and sober for 10 1/2 years 1994-2005. He gained his sobriety by accepting Jesus as hi...	faith432	4	971	Dec 8, 2009 by Jerry F
	I'm Back!!! And boy has life been crazy! (Preview) It has been a really really long time since I have posted here. Life has been rolling along for me. I have been taking my ups and downs pretty well I think. Let's see, to sum things up: My exAH and I have been back to dating since Oct 2008. He lives with his grandma & I live in my house with our kids whom...	QOD	2	667	Dec 8, 2009 by QOD
	Can a drinker stop drinking? (Preview) Hi all, I'm writing this because I have doubts about whether or not my X is actually an alcoholic or just an "alcohol abuser", as in someone who drinks heavily or moderately depending on the situation, but who is able to stop at some point. The reason I ask is because lately, since I have left m...	Nodaybut2day	10	1478	Dec 8, 2009 by Nodaybut2day
	My latest dilemma (Preview) So the ex AH has been staying on the upstairs couch for about 6 weeks now. I have had another issue with oldest daughter who will probably be going to wilderness camp within the next 2 months and because of that position I cannot in good conscience rely on her to take care of her younger brother and siste...	carolinagirl	6	922	Dec 8, 2009 by Tenderheartsks
	I Have A Question (Preview) Guys As i continue to grow and find a new confidence in myself in ways i never believed possible. Life is what i'm finally allowing it to be for me. I'm not overly confident. I'm very easy going, down to earth and i love to laugh and make others laugh too. People call me the likes of "crazygirl or n...	ally	8	787	Dec 8, 2009 by Mattie
	my f2f last night (Preview) I was not going to go to my meeting last night as I sat in my recliner with snuggly pjs on in front of my Christmas tree. I hate to go back out when I get home from work but this has been a very trying week for me with the A son and a lot of other things. I thought to myself...how can I keep tring to urge my son to go to m...	Gailey	4	803	Dec 8, 2009 by Rita G
	How do I talk to my kids about their father's alcoholism? (Preview) Hello to everyone - I have been going to a great weekly Al-Anon meeting for 9 months but am new to this forum. I would love to hear from anyone with ideas about how to talk to my kids about their father's alcoholism. My daughter is 10 and my son just turned 8. I only learned of my husband's chronic drinking...	KellyCO	7	3094	Dec 8, 2009 by Nodaybut2day
	how do you convince your A, they are an A? (Preview) This is a strange question coming from a child of an A. My mother left him because of his drinking but I was to young to remember what he was like then. I am 37 and just in the past few years getting to know my father. I moved closer to him to build a realationship with him. He was forced to stop drinking for h...	mc3	9	1221	Dec 8, 2009 by maresie
	How do u extract the A from the house? (Preview) Hi MIP gang- tonight I did a little personal history lesson and read ovey the posts I started since I joined MIP. WOW! Eye opening. It gives actual dates to the lurid details of life with my addict husband. I actually still loved him back 4 years ago..... So this next detail I could have cut and pasted from...	gknee	3	963	Dec 8, 2009 by kitty
	letting go (Preview) Hi everyone, wow living in reality is tough. My ABF has had a slip after 6 months and is living back in his mums. We are having contact via the phone. He is very upet, angrey, wollowing in self pity. it was his birthday couple of days ago I took a small present and card to his mums. He asked me to call back a...	Tracy	4	888	Dec 8, 2009 by Dyinginside
	Prayers for victim's family. (Preview) ((((Family)))), I am asking for prayers for the family of Richard Antoun. He was an anthropology professor that was stabbed to death yesterday in his office. He was 77 years young. He had more energy at that age than 100 of me combined. A sweet, gentle kind man who life touched many. I found out at...	Karilynn	6	976	Dec 7, 2009 by wp
	Thank you!! (Preview) ((((Family)))) I just wanted to say a great big THANK YOU for all your support, thoughts and prayers. I'm home from the hospital and doing well..... A bit tired but over all much better than I expected Take care Kim/Shadow	shadow1	7	774	Dec 7, 2009 by wp
	courage (Preview) I really need to have strenght to be couragoues to take care of me for the first time in my life rather than everyone else. People have told me in the past that my kindness is my weakness. I do tend to understand another pain and then go into the fix it mode. However I have learnt from Al anon that we are a...	Tracy	2	852	Dec 7, 2009 by inhisarms
	I'm just so confused, I'm scared (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm new to this site. I'll make a long story short. I've been with my BF for 5 yrs. We don't live together. The 5 yrs have been very volatile to say the least. I could not for the life of me understand why our relationship was so up and down. My BF drank, but he was never a fall down drinker or a class...	Dyinginside	9	1200	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Feeling VERY VERY sad, need help with this (Preview) Dear Friends, I am feeling quite sad lately, crying a lot. Next week is my wedding anniversary, my sixteenth. For all of the first fifteen years we were married, my husband was a horribly hard drinking serious A. I am not talking weekend binges, I am talking daily drunkenness to the point of blackout...	MaryPoppins	9	1044	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	new therapist (Preview) I have a new therapist now and our first session went pretty well. I have a full three sessions before Christmas to get started on some topics. I am now having to take a lot of responsibility for permitting the last therapist to cross significant boundaries. I know I can go into people pleasing at the d...	maresie	3	962	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Relapse is more than using again. (Preview) Saying Relapse is part of being an addict, is true. It does not have to mean the addict is using again, they can also relapse into addictive behavior, which sadly almost always ends up with the addict using again. Relapse is a processs. The addict who has had a strong program for many years, starts to not...	Debilyn	12	1971	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Tribute To My Brother (Preview) To all my MIP family, I would like to inform you that my brother Ray loss his 6 month battle with cancer this past Thrusday. He fought a brave battle which was no surprise to me. He was given a military funeral and buried Saturday in the town where he and I were raised, Newton, Mississippi. Th...	RLC	8	1088	Dec 7, 2009 by tea2
	I'm new.. ish (Preview) Hi there I'm new here. I just don't know what to do. I have reached out to Al-anon before in terms of finding info. Right now, I feel like crap. I think my hubby is an A. Well, I know he has a problem. But he's a functioning one. In any case, I found his drinking to be a big problem. He would drink himself stupid e...	Wife of A	2	896	Dec 7, 2009 by canadianguy
	In case someone else has similar communication issues regarding trusting (Preview) It just recently dawned on me, not sure why now. That during the first few years of our relationship anytime I would bring up a subject of intimate discussion- you know those conversations that most "normal" couples just have as they get to know eachother, beliefs, values and feelings- we...	glad	5	1090	Dec 7, 2009 by DreamXL
	My thinking is a mess! (Preview) Hi gang! Had a couple of rough days here. Struggling with making sense of my thoughts. I go from over thinking about the drinker in my life. Almost fantasy thinking, where nothing was bad in the relationship. Only thinking of the good times. At these times I am heart sick. Went I shake myself and t...	fishinmama	5	1387	Dec 7, 2009 by DreamXL
	Feeling So sad and All Alone (Preview) Her it is Saturday night. I worked hard all day. My husband was supposed to make dinner for me (his turn). I got home, said Hello, ....no answer. He was asleep on the recliner. (not a good sign - no dinner and asleep) I could tell by his speech that he had a small amount to drink. Some nights are much wo...	wifeofalcoholic	6	1217	Dec 6, 2009 by Jerry F
	A new perspective.........Finding gratitude and serenity in the insanity of life. (Preview) First of all I'd like to thank Jozie and all of the prayers that were sent out for me on Friday....This is an amazing group of people and an amazing place. As those of you who follow my posts know, I have been stressing for weeks over the pre-surgery tests I had to have Friday. I don't have all the test resul...	shellyj123	1	872	Dec 6, 2009 by hotrod
	Facing a hard decision. (Preview) I am facing a very hard decision. I've been with a man that I love very much for a little over 3 years, now. He has a problem with taking pain medicine, and it has escalated since I've met him. He's gone from taking one low dose vicodin every couple of months when I first met him to snorting 40 miligram per...	cidiera	11	1042	Dec 6, 2009 by GailMichelle
	Controlled Drinking.... Is it possible? (Preview) I'm just curious if anyone has ever experienced with the A in their life a way that they finally were able to control their drinking? For instance, say that the drinking was always out of control, affecting eveything, and then the got to a point to where they were able to drink and not get out of control an...	sdisnie	11	1608	Dec 6, 2009 by Holly09
	Need objective feedback (Preview) Hi all, this is my situation. Me - 23 yrs sober AA, 15 yrs Alanon. He 15 yrs sober. We have been in relationship for 3 years, have had some fantastic times together... even a trip to Europe this summer. He has his home, I have mine. We live mostly independent lives, not glued at the hip but we have never...	lolli09	9	1190	Dec 6, 2009 by lolli09
	The Other Side Of The Coin (Preview) Im not sure how I should have handled this situation. At the invitation of a client, I went to her house for a business meeting. The meeting concerned certain aspects of her house, so it is necessary for us to meet there to review items she wants. I have been to her home a number of times in the past and hav...	ditto	3	886	Dec 5, 2009 by Jerry F
	MIP (fun) Christmas Card Challenge.... (Preview) Hi all.... just wanted to let you all know that for the first time ever, I wrote out Christmas cards to the 13 fellows per John's list that he posted on here a couple of days ago.... It "cost me" two hours of time, plus 13 cards & stamps. The benefits outweigh the costs, as I felt wonderfu...	canadianguy	9	2036	Dec 5, 2009 by serendipity
	Mantra (Preview) "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Dr Seuss. *This quote appears at the bottom of Canadianguy's posts and responses. I agree wholeheartedly.* *Diva*	Diva	5	1672	Dec 5, 2009 by tea2
	Newbie-end of my rope... (Preview) Hi everyone, Not sure what to write here but I know I've got to try something or I may just lose my mind! Once again I've done what I "feel" is right and asked my A to leave. So here I am alone, again with a little less hope than last time but not ready/willing to let go. Today someone told me he will n...	Misshopeful	8	948	Dec 5, 2009 by Karilynn
	Prayer Request for Shellyj123.... (Preview) I have a favor to ask all of MIP... As most of you know shelly123 has been having some health issues, pretty serious stuff... Well today she is at the Docs gettin some test run and they currantly found more problems. All I ask is that ALL of you take the time to say a Little Prayer for her, she has alot on her p...	Jozie	6	1030	Dec 5, 2009 by Karilynn
	Relationships and infidelity and alcohol (Preview) My boyfriend who left me for 3 weeks due to a relapse (who was sober for 9 months) was with another woman. Now he is back with me and sober again - back to AA meetings nightly. I am dealing with all of the emotions except the obsession over him returning to this other woman. He said he didn't love her. She is an...	jasobel	12	2042	Dec 5, 2009 by blender_girl
	Final Holiday Card Request (New Info) (Preview) Please add the two additional people below, who have just entered the MIP recovery houses to your holiday card list. The houses are now full so there will be no other new names coming out after this. New Residents; Bobby S. 413 Strada St. Wilmington, NC 28409 and Adam M. 2704 Oleander Dr. Wilmingto...	John	0	650	Dec 5, 2009 by John
	Why is he behaving so well??! (Preview) Ok, I'm confused. Since we have gone to mediation twice, and since having "a talk", my X is behaving very strangely, as in, he's actually behaving "nicely". I really don't know what to make of it. We had 1 visit with him last week-end that went well. My stepson wasn't there (I have...	Nodaybut2day	4	984	Dec 5, 2009 by glad
	Power and control (Preview) I seem to be on a new level of grief about the ex A and my relationship with him. The more I look at it the more I see all his crises, health problems ( of course his trumped mine no matter what), work problems, car issues, family issues were power and control mechanisms. There is no question he always had t...	maresie	4	837	Dec 5, 2009 by nmike
	Dashboard evoked a temporary meltdown (Preview) I started 2 post over the past week. I got a lot of support, understanding, and hopefully, it helped some. Considering my situation (divorce is pending) I feel as though that I'm doing okay. That is, my foundation is pretty solid, even though my life situation is pretty bleak at the moment. But I sti...	GailMichelle	5	1233	Dec 4, 2009 by GailMichelle
	I wonder why? (Preview) ok I know my focus should be elsewhere, but I have just been reading past posts and notice how many a's hook up with another woman/man right after separating from the somene they have been in a relationship with. How can they move on so quickly. Is it because they follow the path of least resistance? W...	fishinmama	6	850	Dec 4, 2009 by belle1
	Prayer Chain Request, Please - Power in Prayer (Preview) Hello all, I am asking my fellow Al-Anoners to please consider offering up some much needed prayers for another al-anoner, who is having quadruple bypass tomorrow afternoon. He and I have been conversing by way of Yahoo Messenger for the past 4 days. I am doing my best to keep him occupied as well as k...	lacewing	11	1137	Dec 4, 2009 by belle1
	Hangin' in there! (Preview) I am trying very hard to hang in there! It has been a rough road but I am still here. I have struggled with my sanity for almost 24 years & that happens to be how long since I went to my first meeting--one month to go. For all of you who haven't been with us long: there is hope! If I can make it this long &...	Hoot Nanny	2	880	Dec 4, 2009 by Jerry F
	A different approach? (Preview) Hi! I have a question...although I realize it may be different from person to person I can't help wondering: what has worked best for most people with A spouses, is it better to be supportive and kind toward them, or is it better to "detach" yourself and express the pain and anger we feel? I'm...	Misshopeful	2	630	Dec 4, 2009 by canadianguy
	Thanks for the help!!!! (Preview) (((((((((((My Dear Friends)), Thank you for all the wonderful responses to my post....it helped me so very much.....I found the strength to pick myself up and get those decorations up....and It made me feel much better.......and my g=daughter can look out the window and see Santa now..lol.... For...	Andrea12	3	500	Dec 4, 2009 by blender_girl
	How do I find an affordable rehab? UPDATE (Preview) As some of you here and others have reminded me "Why are you taking on this search and not him". I knew full well I needed to keep backing off and let him be responsible for what comes next. You know when that mom thing kicks in your heart takes over your brain. LOL So I backed off and lo and beh...	Mobirdie	3	720	Dec 4, 2009 by maresie
	When do you stop loving them (Preview) It is my esh that we don't. What I have felt and see on our mip board is, we come to a place where we are comfortable with having love for that sick person and knowing it is the disease we hate and blame all the hurt on. This does not mean we will keep that "in love" type feeling. For me it was I was han...	Debilyn	6	975	Dec 4, 2009 by maresie
	Why do so many spouses stay with their alcoholics? (Preview) Hi there everyone. I am new to this outlet - have participated in Alanon in the past but stopped going when I thought my hubby stopped drinking "too much" - isn't that a hoot? I have been wondering why in the world I would want to stay with my husband. I am going to seek spiritual direction fr...	Leelee	6	3413	Dec 4, 2009 by glad
	I'm back (Preview) Hi Everyone, I'm back after being off of the board for about a year. I guess things calmed down w/ my AH but recently my life has been pure CHAOS ! Today I'm taking my 13 yr old daughter to see a psychologist b/c she is so stressed due to his increased drinking and the family dynamics. I feel sick that I hav...	angel66	4	835	Dec 4, 2009 by Debilyn
	My 1st Year .... (Preview) Hey All... As most of you know, the month of Nov is a tough one for me, My AFather died that month, has a birthday that month, and pasted on Thanksgiving..So Yeah.. Rough Month, and THIS Year was the first whole year since he pasted...1st birthday in Heaven... However... i think Oct. was harder, only be...	Jozie	2	800	Dec 3, 2009 by hotrod
	Update from Yesterday (Preview) AFiance called me while I was at work and he was walking 2.5 mi to the emergency room to check himself into the psych ward. We talked when he got there just to check in. I called the hospital last night to make sure he was there and was safe. I'm just full of sadness. I love him so much and I just keep hoping t...	Ragdolls	4	918	Dec 3, 2009 by maresie
	Shadow is out of surgery (Preview) Hey all, kim is out of surgery, I haven't spoken to her yet but she is doing ok, more to follow Dale	Dale	8	1010	Dec 3, 2009 by Dale
	I feel like I need to do something but don't know (Preview) AFiance had court today and didn't want me to go with him because he was ashamed. Last night was terrible! He was panicking and rambling and seemed like he was still drunk from the day before. Who knows? I woke up at 3 AM and he wasn't in bed. I called him (lazy me) and he was sleeping on the couch. I get...	Ragdolls	12	1185	Dec 3, 2009 by maresie
	When does it get easier?????? (Preview) ((((((((hello friends)))))))), I don't know when it gets easier, the holidays are an espically hard time for me...I haven't decorated the outside of my home since husband died....yesterday i decided it was time to move forward.....i do have a 17 month old g-daughter and I Know she would enjoy the de...	Andrea12	10	1171	Dec 3, 2009 by maresie
	have you experienced? (Preview) As I mentioned before, I was an alanon member in the past. I guess I thought I was cured and walked away from alanon and hooked up with a man who is an alcoholic. I am attracted to them like a magnet. Things had it's usual meltdown and now we are done. I hurt and know that alanon is there for the taking but I...	fishinmama	5	1014	Dec 3, 2009 by diamond
	Intuition, instinct, or just anxiety? In desperate need of some ESH... (Preview) I find myself today in a place that I can not seem to get myself out of, and Im not sure why. I am schedule for surgery on December the 18th and it has me feeling completely off in every direction. Now I have had 3 prior surgeries on different things and have always made it out ok. Other than the last time, t...	shellyj123	5	1477	Dec 3, 2009 by Tenderheartsks
	It's a family DIS-EASE (Preview) I've been lurking a lot lately. Not posting much. I've felt I've needed to take a back seat and try to listen and learn. My life is changing. After 13 months of physical separation I've come to understand that my marriage to my ex-aH is over. There are many reasons why, that would be too lengthy and to...	Rora	7	994	Dec 2, 2009 by Debilyn
	Update on me (Preview) I'm going to be brief... Well I'm going to try.... :) Had another altercation with oldest daughter yesterday morning and police were called. I am going to work to get her into a group home or wilderness camp before it's too late (sorry Debilyn). I am at the end of the line with her and all the counseling...	carolinagirl	4	833	Dec 2, 2009 by maresie
	Calm before the storm ??? (Preview) Well we made it through Thanksgiving without any problems.My A was really easy to get along with this year.I could almost faint. He still drinking but slowed down some and I noticed a change .I guess I'm always in fear of the calm before the storm.Kinda like ,okay this is going great but for how long ? I...	cassidy2010	4	889	Dec 2, 2009 by cassidy2010
	Our Shadow? (Preview) Did I miss an update or anything??? thank you. love,debilyn	Debilyn	5	885	Dec 2, 2009 by Dale
	"One day at a Time" A gift of inspiration and hope to all in recovery (Preview) http://reverbnation.com/tunepak/2042171	edmond	1	556	Dec 1, 2009 by Christy
	a new look at powerlessness (Preview) well I got to the box at the bottom of the closet only to find that they were not my alanon books but aa books of my sons. I decided to go ahead and read step one from the aa 12 X 12. Not much difference from alanon. Then I got out a piece of paper and wrote down the actions I had taken in the last few months to co...	fishinmama	1	818	Dec 1, 2009 by Jerry F
	Child of an Alcoholic (Preview) Hi Folks, I have been lurking on this website off and on for a couple of years and finally decided I better start posting! First, I would like to thank everyone both past and present who post and share and just have helped me relate to what I have been going thru. It was here that I learned how to detach fr...	Peace101	3	954	Dec 1, 2009 by glad
	How do I find an affordable rehab? (Preview) Many of you know me by my story in the Forum. Well the son in program went back out and is now in Detox at the Veteran's Hospital. They recommended Celebrate Recovery for him but I contacted them and they want $40,000 for 90 days. Can someone tell me what drug addict or alcoholic has that kind of money? T...	Mobirdie	6	1494	Dec 1, 2009 by John
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.