Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Maize · Maize

My friend in recovery is coming home in 2 weeks. The codependent person in me is worried about how he will do when he does get back. The person in me that is changing and working on things through my learnings in Alanon is saying "live for today, you can do this, don't worry about when he gets here a...

Ness · Ness

Hi All.....Im on a right downer at the mo and not much good to man nor beast.... A damn big black cloud is surrounding me and isnt shifting. It was my birthday yesterday...yay.... and for the 1st time in 3 yrs I got a lovely card from Ason....who is currently two weeks into a 16 week rehab, ..... but I just f...

never going back · never going back

Hi ((((friends))))!! It seems I live my life with songs constantly playing in my head (usually James Taylor-love that man!!!). Maybe because I almost always have the radio or CD playing? Anyway, it occurred to me that the messages from songs are a very powerful influence in my life and always had been...

Gailey · Gailey

My son finally moved out with his girlfriend. After about 2 weeks at her house he announces that they are getting married. WTH!!!!! I truly do not believe it is love but more convenience. I know I must stay out of his business. They are having a small wedding. I have been told to just embrace their decis...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I was washing my supper dishes when the doorbell rang. He was standing at my back door, I went out to talk to him and of course I alreading knew what he was going to say before he even said it. He blamed everyone for his drug problem, his school mates taunting him, he wasn't taught about the real world by us...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I AM VERY HAPPY TO REPORT THAT I AM ATTENDING A MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR A FORMER HIGHLY-DECORATED WWII VETERAN. IT WILL BE A VERY HUGE CELEBRATION OF LIFE IN MY HOMETOWN TOMORROW. I FEEL HONORED TO ATTEND THIS. HE GOT THE CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR FROM A FORMER PRESIDENT IN THE 90'S & I JUST WANTED T...

Maize · Maize

Hi there, I am Maize. I am 35 and new to all of this. I have spent a year and a half in intense therapy, with 5 days in the hospital for feeling suicidal. I was trapped in an awful and abusive marriage. I felt alone and didn't want to go on. On to bigger and brighter things, and I am divorced and free now! I...

Aloha · Aloha

Yesterday I finally got to the court and filed for divorce. It's the beginning of the paperwork, but it was a step I finally needed to get under way. I took the day off to make sure I got down to the courthouse instead of trying to squeeze in an extra hour or two off from work. I called AH and let him know and tol...

Jerry F · Jerry F

how the arrival and presence of a child can calm rough waters and chronic negativity. Avery Leipua (flower lei) arrived at 3:20PM, 11 days early and a little light at 6lbs 11ozs and angel pink. She caused the whole family to focus for a while and smile for no other reason than she was calming. Grandso...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I've been venting alot of negative stuff lately and I thank all of you for your patience with me. I feel I have legitimate reasons to be unhappy and despite things I can do to "distract myself" (because that's all they really are, there's nothing that's truly going to bring lasting happine...

okwitt · okwitt

My A adult son got into the recovery house for 30 intense training days. I want to be hopeful..but reading on here seems they usually start back drinking. I have felt such a weight lifted off me while he is there. I could really get used to this...then reality sets in with him back with no job and on and on an...

Maize · Maize

I didn't sleep well last night. I had to fight my depression this morning alone, as when I was feeling it, I didn't feel I could call anyone that early in the morning. I fought through and I am working on staying positive now. I know that for me, when I don't sleep well, my depression and panic attacks ha...

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

Went to an open AA/Alanon meeting tonight. We had a video on the 12 step program. After the video, was open discussion. It just made me think to myself how grateful I was to be in attendance there and to be able to come here and share/read/vent/respond to different posts. So, I just wanted to tell you a...

tlcate · tlcate

I am in the process of trying to buy my first house. I am doing it 100% on my own with nothing but a lot of advice from others . Fear can be so destructive!!! My fear translates to procrastination. Do something other than what you are afraid of and deal with it when it gets here. Go have fun, bury myself in w...

Jozie · Jozie

Hey Guys... Wow... I Just went & Looked at my last Post and somehow it has been a MONTH since you have last heard from me ;( Just wanted to let all know that I am Doing OK... The Trip to meet my New Found Friend was Wonderful, I only got to see her for about 5 hours, because they had to work the next morning, ...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

(((((Friends))))), Ok, today is another day.....have taken my son's car from him..he is 18 and what else can I do...I can only do this because it is in my name and I know his car means everything to him.... Now I don't know what this will accomplish or even if it will accomplish anything however it's wort...

Cosmos · Cosmos

Hi all. I am currently finding this program very hard. I know that it is the only way and that I need to keep working it, but its getting harder. I think Im experiencing some sort of a withdrawal from my alcoholic ex-girlfriend. I havent heard from her in a month. She was doing her step work in AA and was ad...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Had a little a ha moment this morning and want to share it. I was doing some talking with my HP. I was asking my hp to help me love him as I was having a bit of an acceptance problem. An acceptance problem I have practiced over and over again. The answer Why don't you trust I love you. Oh my goodness, I want t...

Jerry F · Jerry F

"As We Understood" a great piece of CAL literature thats been around since the 80ies and came out of the Quebec International? Wednesday Night Turning Point (our home group) did the meeting from it on prayer and meditation. I don't think a meeting could have been better that what we had....

miss_carol · miss_carol

Today I am wondering why I didn't leave the first time he used any mind altering substance, but I didn't. ( Because I hoped it was just once). So here I am, I married him 3 years ago and now I only get a glimpse of who sober hubby is. Somedays I can remember he is sick, others I wonder why I would pick a "los...

Katy · Katy

Jerry you floor me, lol, I was an avid alcoholic pet collector, pet defect owner was me, my friend pointed this out not so long backlol, Why she said do you always go for the sickly ones, why not choose the happy healthy ones with smiley faces and waggly tails? Well I always felt sorry for the sickly ones,...

ziggymiller · ziggymiller

I am new to Alanon. I tried going to meetings before and things kinda got better and I stopped going, plus three young kids and full time job made it difficult. I know I need to get back to being me! Things have recently, built up and are about to come crashing down. I can know longer trust my AH to take car...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

I wish I could be constant positivity.......I wish I could be a jolly little trooper all the time......and I wish I had it together.......... Ok, So about two hours ago my cell phone fell in a university public toilet as I swung my purse around in the stall...........And for this insignificant litt...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

Last night my AH came home drunk BUT with a cellphone I've been telling him I want. I took it, told him thanks and did not speak to him for the rest of the night cause I only had mean things to say to him. He of course was acting like an idiot and even had the nerve to tell me that I was ungrateful for not gushing ov...

myself · myself

Thank you for your support and advice. I dont know what I will do but I pray for the strength to do as I need for myself and the children I am raising. I hear that I'm not responsible for my son being an alcoholic but I find that hard to swallow as in the literature I have read I know that environment can help con...

kablisnow · kablisnow

For six weeks I supported him and brought the kids every weekend to visit and now hes home and already drinking and lyeing. He went to treatment on his own b/c he said he finally realized what his life had become. I havent gotten mad or yelled, Ive been sympathetic and let him know I was here if he needed to t...

Bella333 · Bella333

I am hurting a lot right now. On July 1st my exAbf told me he is seeing someone. We have been broken up for 3 years but have remained best friends and neither of us has seen anyone seriously. We have hung out once in the past three weeks. I told him I needed to be distant to have time to adjust to this new turn of e...

tlcate · tlcate

Please come share your ES&H -- Edited by tlcate on Wednesday 28th of July 2010 05:29:07 PM

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

I finally separated from my husband. I've come to the conclusion where I'm OK with a divorce. He does not want to. In the past I asked him so many times for couples counseling which he often would avoid and not make time for.....The children are OK, yet I understand change is difficult for them as well and...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello Everyone! Its been such a long time since I've visited here. I've learned so many tools of the trade from all of you. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Just wanted to let everyone know that I am now a believer that life with an A is possible. It takes work everyday, but it is possible. It's no...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I've been told many times, as I've lamented about the lack of love in my life, that I had to learn to love myself. I have to admit to being skeptical about this. Can I do it, yes, have I loved myself in the past, absolutely. Now? Maybe not as much, but I dont' loathe myself. But it has never felt like enoug...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

My wife is for the most part a non drinking, alcoholic behaving person who creates tension, unease, financial hardship and insecurity in our household. Bad enough it gets to me but I worry about my daughter as well. I realize this isn't new to anyone else here, but I am so resentful and bitter toward he...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

Funny my first time through alanon, about 10 years ago (was involved for 5 years or so), my higher power felt real, was a source of comfort and I believed in him. This time, I'm not feeling it. I feel abandoned by my HP, or that he's ineffectual. It's such a part of recovery that I dont' know how to move on w...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Family...I've got another opportunity to talk with a local representative regarding a legislative proposal I've mentioned before that seeks fairness, honesty and justice on the issues regarding alcohol in my small community. I've been at this for a while and like I've been taught in Al-Ano...

lyndebi · lyndebi

yuck. This is tough. I am emotionally fine. But I tell ya, this is a drag. I got to none but was not feeling right. Doc told me to do it more gradual. Woke up feeling icky so took some. Will get over it yet! (c: All is great here, animals are all fat, Peaches horse looks like a yellow cow....Pony Pete had a bad cu...

Greenvalleygal · Greenvalleygal

My adult sons live next to me and Son 1 is an alcoholic while Son 2 who is a Type I diabetic is addicted to prescribed pain meds and abuses them by snorting. By the end of the month, he runs out of pills and does whatever he can to purchase street drugs. Yesterday Son 2took money from Son 1 without asking ......

freespiritedbird83 · freespiritedbird83

Hey all, My name is Maryann. I am a 27 year old female currently residing and living in Wisconsin. I am a semi-new member of Al-Anon in my town, and I am looking for a sponsor online or offline, as long as I can find one in the coming future. Although my group is very lovely and very nice, I just dont know, can...

Samsgram · Samsgram

This would not be the first time I have given her a loan. I changed the subject today when she asked in her indirect way of asking me. I keep reminding myself of her awful she treated me for the last year BUT I feel terrible she says she`ll pay whoever gives the loan back $100 a week. I know she`ll moan and groa...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

A big thing that changed for me in recovery was my sense of humor. I mean, it was in there and would come out sometimes before the program, but I had no ability to laugh at myself and took everything soooo seriously. It's been a really amazing experience to find humor in things - even in recovery. Last n...

ollie · ollie

hi family. i dont post often,but im with you everday. well AH has just come out of hospital,he now has hernia,ulcer on the oesophagus,plus a bleed in the stomach. im not counting on this being his bottom,who knows. plus it was our ruby wedding anniversary yesterday. it went unoticed,not one card . ho...

Katy · Katy

For me everything lol, Jeez it has took me an age to get this wow, I have been wondering how to I get the trust back? And suddenly it hit me, did I really ever have any? Nope not really, so no wonder I can't get it back I am looking for something I only imagined I had, I am so lucky that I can start from scratch now...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), July 22 is never a good day for me. On that day 9 years ago I lost my father. What a hero he was to me. On that day 2 years ago I lost my beloved Tim. The two men I loved most in the world, lost on the same day 9 years apart. They are both in a better place, but God do I miss them terribly. I have bee...

myself · myself

I am so lost at the moment..I sit here and know that in the other room two of the most important people in my life are killing themselves and I can't do a thing to save either of them at all. I raised one and promised to always keep him safe and today he is 25 and has only been sober for 18 hrs in the last 30 days. I...

TLM · TLM

I haven't been here in a reallly long time, and can't get to a f2f meeting for a few days. I could really use some ESH today folks. For some reason, I am suddenly obsessing about the A in my life - about whether or not he is drinking, etc. I am literally making myself crazy. It has been a very long time since...

maresie · maresie

As a result of doing the 4th step (with a sponsor) all my relationships are changing. Friendships that I thought were mutual aren't. My whole view of the world has changed and my focus has gone from people pleasing and not feeling worthy to focus and feeling that I too deserve to have a life, goals and fe...

pax · pax

I'm new and reluctant to post this.. 2 alcoholics in my family and I'm a mom in grad school. I am unable to attend alanon meetings. Is there a forum with more privacy?

shadow1 · shadow1

((((((((((Family of Choice))))))) I'm trying to let go of some control in my life and I am in need of some help. I have been struggling with this for a while now and am at a loss with what to do. I have 2 teen boys 18 and 16. I have been a single parent for 2 1/2 years and have done 90% of the yard work, house work, l...

Overcome · Overcome

Ash got me to thinking about geographical moves when it comes to the alcoholic and that "wherever we go, there we are". I have made several geographical moves due to alcoholics in my life, and in each case it has never worked, just from the standpoint of "fixing the alcoholic situatio...

miss_carol · miss_carol

Rough weekend. I tried to practice my alanon by letting go and detaching. When hubby went to the bar Friday for the night. I did ok but I wish I could have just said ok see you later. NO! I had to get in my head going a million miles an hour. I didn't yell but I said "sweet" manipulative things like...

looking_for_peace · looking_for_peace

Need to vent. There is one thing that I am so sick and tired of about this whole sickness. It's the isolation. I just talked to my husband's father and he told me that the family got together for a bonfire last night at the family camp. It was just an impromptu thing and I KNOW no one meant to hurt my feelings....

glad · glad

The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype. Some of the symptoms include: 1. Loss of direction 2. Foul vocal emission...

raid3rgirl · raid3rgirl

I've been married to my AH for 21 yrs and everyone is right it only get's worse. I am always angry, my poor children were raised in this Alcoholic Angry Home. I always felt like i can handle this. I am 42 now and now all my 3 children have children and do not like that i feel like i am reliving my childhood. ...

Samsgram · Samsgram

First let me explain.. My mother has some money that she has on occassion given to my daughter and children in advance when they needed something and said it was part of their inheritance. Although recently my mother doesnt seem to generous with it but she can be a softie when someone presents a situati...

Harvest · Harvest

I have been married to this man who has been smoking pot everyday . He also drinks alcohol 3 to 4 times a week. So many promises, "when the children will be born-I will quit", "when the kids are old enough to understand- I will quit" all unkept. Its your fault that I smoke and drink.....

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, My son decided no military (thank you God), don't misunderstand I think the people who fight every day to save our country are above all of us and I have great respect for them. I just don't want my son that far gone for than long (selfish but I don't care). I thought my son was doing drugs. I...

stopandchat · stopandchat

Hi, I posted about a week ago that my AH moved out while I was at work. He's still gone - he is living in a very scuzzy apartment on an air mattress. Anyway, we have seen each other several times (just last night went to an open talk together), and we talk and text every day, several times a day. He says he need...

BrokenBunny · BrokenBunny

I saw this Forum and I am new at this. Didn't know if I should even be doing this, but I have kept too much bottled inside and getting more confused if I am losing my sanity or not and maybe some suggestions and opinions. Been with boyfriend for 4 yrs. He drinks approx 4 glasses of Vodka each evening. Gets...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Another really nice birthday again this year! I enjoyed so much being with my husband & traveling 60 miles to see a movie & get a good lunch @ Red Lobster yesterday! When I got back on the computer this morning, I counted about 13 messages from my FB friends wishing me a happy birthday! I wish I ha...

glad · glad

I'm so glad we can take what we like and leave the rest. I've often said alanon is what organized religion-( First Baptist or Methodist Church or whatever) should hope to be. I recently encountered somene who had some good things to say but said it as if they has "arrived" at this all knowing s...

Grace M · Grace M

Hi everyone, I hate feeling so low and depressed but I can not help how I feel. I feel so drained of all energy and emotion I have nothing left to give, it has been a long time since I have felt this bad and I don't want to feel like this, usually I am hopeful, happy and have hope and faith. I usualy am the one to...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Working hard on EVERYTHING (Preview) My friend in recovery is coming home in 2 weeks. The codependent person in me is worried about how he will do when he does get back. The person in me that is changing and working on things through my learnings in Alanon is saying "live for today, you can do this, don't worry about when he gets here a...	Maize	4	581	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	Severe kick up the butt needed......thanks in advance! (Preview) Hi All.....Im on a right downer at the mo and not much good to man nor beast.... A damn big black cloud is surrounding me and isnt shifting. It was my birthday yesterday...yay.... and for the 1st time in 3 yrs I got a lovely card from Ason....who is currently two weeks into a 16 week rehab, ..... but I just f...	Ness	13	1410	Jul 30, 2010 by Jennifer
	Changed for good (Preview) Hi ((((friends))))!! It seems I live my life with songs constantly playing in my head (usually James Taylor-love that man!!!). Maybe because I almost always have the radio or CD playing? Anyway, it occurred to me that the messages from songs are a very powerful influence in my life and always had been...	never going back	4	771	Jul 30, 2010 by abbyal
	so...he moved out and now he is getting married!!!!! (Preview) My son finally moved out with his girlfriend. After about 2 weeks at her house he announces that they are getting married. WTH!!!!! I truly do not believe it is love but more convenience. I know I must stay out of his business. They are having a small wedding. I have been told to just embrace their decis...	Gailey	8	802	Jul 30, 2010 by Ness
	I Saw My AS Today.... (Preview) I was washing my supper dishes when the doorbell rang. He was standing at my back door, I went out to talk to him and of course I alreading knew what he was going to say before he even said it. He blamed everyone for his drug problem, his school mates taunting him, he wasn't taught about the real world by us...	DreamsOver	7	846	Jul 30, 2010 by Ness
	PATRIOTISM (Preview) I AM VERY HAPPY TO REPORT THAT I AM ATTENDING A MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR A FORMER HIGHLY-DECORATED WWII VETERAN. IT WILL BE A VERY HUGE CELEBRATION OF LIFE IN MY HOMETOWN TOMORROW. I FEEL HONORED TO ATTEND THIS. HE GOT THE CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR FROM A FORMER PRESIDENT IN THE 90'S & I JUST WANTED T...	Hoot Nanny	3	622	Jul 30, 2010 by Jerry F
	Brand new to this... (Preview) Hi there, I am Maize. I am 35 and new to all of this. I have spent a year and a half in intense therapy, with 5 days in the hospital for feeling suicidal. I was trapped in an awful and abusive marriage. I felt alone and didn't want to go on. On to bigger and brighter things, and I am divorced and free now! I...	Maize	16	837	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	Really amazing the powerful emotions I have where ex-AH is concerned. (Preview) Yesterday I finally got to the court and filed for divorce. It's the beginning of the paperwork, but it was a step I finally needed to get under way. I took the day off to make sure I got down to the courthouse instead of trying to squeeze in an extra hour or two off from work. I called AH and let him know and tol...	Aloha	2	646	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	It's Amazing (Preview) how the arrival and presence of a child can calm rough waters and chronic negativity. Avery Leipua (flower lei) arrived at 3:20PM, 11 days early and a little light at 6lbs 11ozs and angel pink. She caused the whole family to focus for a while and smile for no other reason than she was calming. Grandso...	Jerry F	16	974	Jul 30, 2010 by Ness
	Ok...gratitude time..... (Preview) I've been venting alot of negative stuff lately and I thank all of you for your patience with me. I feel I have legitimate reasons to be unhappy and despite things I can do to "distract myself" (because that's all they really are, there's nothing that's truly going to bring lasting happine...	mjhyankees	4	713	Jul 30, 2010 by xeno59
	What else? It's my son. (Preview) My A adult son got into the recovery house for 30 intense training days. I want to be hopeful..but reading on here seems they usually start back drinking. I have felt such a weight lifted off me while he is there. I could really get used to this...then reality sets in with him back with no job and on and on an...	okwitt	4	699	Jul 30, 2010 by xeno59
	Staying positive? (Preview) I didn't sleep well last night. I had to fight my depression this morning alone, as when I was feeling it, I didn't feel I could call anyone that early in the morning. I fought through and I am working on staying positive now. I know that for me, when I don't sleep well, my depression and panic attacks ha...	Maize	8	778	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	So Grateful (Preview) Went to an open AA/Alanon meeting tonight. We had a video on the 12 step program. After the video, was open discussion. It just made me think to myself how grateful I was to be in attendance there and to be able to come here and share/read/vent/respond to different posts. So, I just wanted to tell you a...	Sweet Stanley	5	509	Jul 30, 2010 by never going back
	Fear (Preview) I am in the process of trying to buy my first house. I am doing it 100% on my own with nothing but a lot of advice from others . Fear can be so destructive!!! My fear translates to procrastination. Do something other than what you are afraid of and deal with it when it gets here. Go have fun, bury myself in w...	tlcate	6	782	Jul 30, 2010 by Karilynn
	Found my way back... :) (Preview) Hey Guys... Wow... I Just went & Looked at my last Post and somehow it has been a MONTH since you have last heard from me ;( Just wanted to let all know that I am Doing OK... The Trip to meet my New Found Friend was Wonderful, I only got to see her for about 5 hours, because they had to work the next morning, ...	Jozie	6	776	Jul 30, 2010 by Karilynn
	Trying to Get Thru to my Son (Preview) (((((Friends))))), Ok, today is another day.....have taken my son's car from him..he is 18 and what else can I do...I can only do this because it is in my name and I know his car means everything to him.... Now I don't know what this will accomplish or even if it will accomplish anything however it's wort...	Andrea12	6	750	Jul 30, 2010 by Karilynn
	I fear I'm loosing it. This is getting worse day by day... (Preview) Hi all. I am currently finding this program very hard. I know that it is the only way and that I need to keep working it, but its getting harder. I think Im experiencing some sort of a withdrawal from my alcoholic ex-girlfriend. I havent heard from her in a month. She was doing her step work in AA and was ad...	Cosmos	7	1210	Jul 30, 2010 by Cosmos
	What a thought (Preview) Had a little a ha moment this morning and want to share it. I was doing some talking with my HP. I was asking my hp to help me love him as I was having a bit of an acceptance problem. An acceptance problem I have practiced over and over again. The answer Why don't you trust I love you. Oh my goodness, I want t...	fishinmama	4	811	Jul 29, 2010 by Rocky38
	Anyone else reading and using (Preview) "As We Understood" a great piece of CAL literature thats been around since the 80ies and came out of the Quebec International? Wednesday Night Turning Point (our home group) did the meeting from it on prayer and meditation. I don't think a meeting could have been better that what we had....	Jerry F	6	824	Jul 29, 2010 by Aloha
	Trying not to be mad at myself (Preview) Today I am wondering why I didn't leave the first time he used any mind altering substance, but I didn't. ( Because I hoped it was just once). So here I am, I married him 3 years ago and now I only get a glimpse of who sober hubby is. Somedays I can remember he is sick, others I wonder why I would pick a "los...	miss_carol	4	864	Jul 29, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Alcoholic pets! (Preview) Jerry you floor me, lol, I was an avid alcoholic pet collector, pet defect owner was me, my friend pointed this out not so long backlol, Why she said do you always go for the sickly ones, why not choose the happy healthy ones with smiley faces and waggly tails? Well I always felt sorry for the sickly ones,...	Katy	2	746	Jul 29, 2010 by Jozie
	Today...I am takin control over my life. (Preview) I am new to Alanon. I tried going to meetings before and things kinda got better and I stopped going, plus three young kids and full time job made it difficult. I know I need to get back to being me! Things have recently, built up and are about to come crashing down. I can know longer trust my AH to take car...	ziggymiller	4	827	Jul 29, 2010 by Maize
	Control & Higher Power (Preview) I wish I could be constant positivity.......I wish I could be a jolly little trooper all the time......and I wish I had it together.......... Ok, So about two hours ago my cell phone fell in a university public toilet as I swung my purse around in the stall...........And for this insignificant litt...	RoseODAT	4	816	Jul 29, 2010 by Maize
	Presents and booze (Preview) Last night my AH came home drunk BUT with a cellphone I've been telling him I want. I took it, told him thanks and did not speak to him for the rest of the night cause I only had mean things to say to him. He of course was acting like an idiot and even had the nerve to tell me that I was ungrateful for not gushing ov...	Priscilla83	2	689	Jul 29, 2010 by never going back
	I do hold part of the blame for who he has become today....I am his mother!!!! (Preview) Thank you for your support and advice. I dont know what I will do but I pray for the strength to do as I need for myself and the children I am raising. I hear that I'm not responsible for my son being an alcoholic but I find that hard to swallow as in the literature I have read I know that environment can help con...	myself	10	852	Jul 28, 2010 by fob888
	home a week from rehab and already drank twice.... (Preview) For six weeks I supported him and brought the kids every weekend to visit and now hes home and already drinking and lyeing. He went to treatment on his own b/c he said he finally realized what his life had become. I havent gotten mad or yelled, Ive been sympathetic and let him know I was here if he needed to t...	kablisnow	8	1036	Jul 28, 2010 by abbyal
	struggling to survive my exAbf moving on (Preview) I am hurting a lot right now. On July 1st my exAbf told me he is seeing someone. We have been broken up for 3 years but have remained best friends and neither of us has seen anyone seriously. We have hung out once in the past three weeks. I told him I needed to be distant to have time to adjust to this new turn of e...	Bella333	4	818	Jul 28, 2010 by Bella333
	Step 5 is up on the step work board (Preview) Please come share your ES&H -- Edited by tlcate on Wednesday 28th of July 2010 05:29:07 PM	tlcate	0	527	Jul 28, 2010 by tlcate
	Patience..... asking for patience (Preview) I finally separated from my husband. I've come to the conclusion where I'm OK with a divorce. He does not want to. In the past I asked him so many times for couples counseling which he often would avoid and not make time for.....The children are OK, yet I understand change is difficult for them as well and...	RoseODAT	6	1228	Jul 28, 2010 by kitty
	It's not always easy, but for me it's worth it! (Preview) Hello Everyone! Its been such a long time since I've visited here. I've learned so many tools of the trade from all of you. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Just wanted to let everyone know that I am now a believer that life with an A is possible. It takes work everyday, but it is possible. It's no...	Sincerely	4	676	Jul 28, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Love myself???? Is that enough?????? (Preview) I've been told many times, as I've lamented about the lack of love in my life, that I had to learn to love myself. I have to admit to being skeptical about this. Can I do it, yes, have I loved myself in the past, absolutely. Now? Maybe not as much, but I dont' loathe myself. But it has never felt like enoug...	mjhyankees	8	1132	Jul 28, 2010 by ythannah
	struggling with resentment.... (Preview) My wife is for the most part a non drinking, alcoholic behaving person who creates tension, unease, financial hardship and insecurity in our household. Bad enough it gets to me but I worry about my daughter as well. I realize this isn't new to anyone else here, but I am so resentful and bitter toward he...	mjhyankees	3	1336	Jul 28, 2010 by kitty
	No higher power..... (Preview) Funny my first time through alanon, about 10 years ago (was involved for 5 years or so), my higher power felt real, was a source of comfort and I believed in him. This time, I'm not feeling it. I feel abandoned by my HP, or that he's ineffectual. It's such a part of recovery that I dont' know how to move on w...	mjhyankees	12	992	Jul 28, 2010 by kitty
	MIP Support... (Preview) Aloha Family...I've got another opportunity to talk with a local representative regarding a legislative proposal I've mentioned before that seeks fairness, honesty and justice on the issues regarding alcohol in my small community. I've been at this for a while and like I've been taught in Al-Ano...	Jerry F	6	943	Jul 28, 2010 by Katy
	weaning off effexor/Eden update (Preview) yuck. This is tough. I am emotionally fine. But I tell ya, this is a drag. I got to none but was not feeling right. Doc told me to do it more gradual. Woke up feeling icky so took some. Will get over it yet! (c: All is great here, animals are all fat, Peaches horse looks like a yellow cow....Pony Pete had a bad cu...	lyndebi	8	1048	Jul 28, 2010 by Katy
	Two sons (Preview) My adult sons live next to me and Son 1 is an alcoholic while Son 2 who is a Type I diabetic is addicted to prescribed pain meds and abuses them by snorting. By the end of the month, he runs out of pills and does whatever he can to purchase street drugs. Yesterday Son 2took money from Son 1 without asking ......	Greenvalleygal	11	848	Jul 27, 2010 by buick23
	RE: SPONSORSHIP (Preview) Hey all, My name is Maryann. I am a 27 year old female currently residing and living in Wisconsin. I am a semi-new member of Al-Anon in my town, and I am looking for a sponsor online or offline, as long as I can find one in the coming future. Although my group is very lovely and very nice, I just dont know, can...	freespiritedbird83	1	578	Jul 27, 2010 by buick23
	Help, I Need Some Advice, Daughter, is Asking Me for a Loan! She`s now changed her tune! (Preview) This would not be the first time I have given her a loan. I changed the subject today when she asked in her indirect way of asking me. I keep reminding myself of her awful she treated me for the last year BUT I feel terrible she says she`ll pay whoever gives the loan back $100 a week. I know she`ll moan and groa...	Samsgram	7	1529	Jul 27, 2010 by Samsgram
	Laughter in recovery (Preview) A big thing that changed for me in recovery was my sense of humor. I mean, it was in there and would come out sometimes before the program, but I had no ability to laugh at myself and took everything soooo seriously. It's been a really amazing experience to find humor in things - even in recovery. Last n...	White Rabbit	9	1852	Jul 27, 2010 by Maize
	TRYING TO STAY STRONG ,AMONG THE CRAP. (Preview) hi family. i dont post often,but im with you everday. well AH has just come out of hospital,he now has hernia,ulcer on the oesophagus,plus a bleed in the stomach. im not counting on this being his bottom,who knows. plus it was our ruby wedding anniversary yesterday. it went unoticed,not one card . ho...	ollie	9	860	Jul 27, 2010 by ollie
	Todays reading in Courage to Change! To identify the illusion of? What ? (Preview) For me everything lol, Jeez it has took me an age to get this wow, I have been wondering how to I get the trust back? And suddenly it hit me, did I really ever have any? Nope not really, so no wonder I can't get it back I am looking for something I only imagined I had, I am so lucky that I can start from scratch now...	Katy	3	2909	Jul 27, 2010 by Maize
	Feeling the loss & feeling guilty (Preview) (((Family))), July 22 is never a good day for me. On that day 9 years ago I lost my father. What a hero he was to me. On that day 2 years ago I lost my beloved Tim. The two men I loved most in the world, lost on the same day 9 years apart. They are both in a better place, but God do I miss them terribly. I have bee...	Karilynn	18	1255	Jul 27, 2010 by Gailey
	PLEASE HELP ME AS I AM DROWNING IN THEIR LIQUID WORLD (Preview) I am so lost at the moment..I sit here and know that in the other room two of the most important people in my life are killing themselves and I can't do a thing to save either of them at all. I raised one and promised to always keep him safe and today he is 25 and has only been sober for 18 hrs in the last 30 days. I...	myself	8	1167	Jul 27, 2010 by myself
	I need some ESH, Please (Preview) I haven't been here in a reallly long time, and can't get to a f2f meeting for a few days. I could really use some ESH today folks. For some reason, I am suddenly obsessing about the A in my life - about whether or not he is drinking, etc. I am literally making myself crazy. It has been a very long time since...	TLM	7	744	Jul 27, 2010 by Jerry F
	Everything changes in recovery ! (Preview) As a result of doing the 4th step (with a sponsor) all my relationships are changing. Friendships that I thought were mutual aren't. My whole view of the world has changed and my focus has gone from people pleasing and not feeling worthy to focus and feeling that I too deserve to have a life, goals and fe...	maresie	9	1018	Jul 26, 2010 by Andrea12
	new here (Preview) I'm new and reluctant to post this.. 2 alcoholics in my family and I'm a mom in grad school. I am unable to attend alanon meetings. Is there a forum with more privacy?	pax	10	789	Jul 26, 2010 by Jennifer
	Teens!!!!UGH!!!! (Preview) ((((((((((Family of Choice))))))) I'm trying to let go of some control in my life and I am in need of some help. I have been struggling with this for a while now and am at a loss with what to do. I have 2 teen boys 18 and 16. I have been a single parent for 2 1/2 years and have done 90% of the yard work, house work, l...	shadow1	10	935	Jul 26, 2010 by Andrea12
	Geographical moves (Preview) Ash got me to thinking about geographical moves when it comes to the alcoholic and that "wherever we go, there we are". I have made several geographical moves due to alcoholics in my life, and in each case it has never worked, just from the standpoint of "fixing the alcoholic situatio...	Overcome	6	1201	Jul 26, 2010 by Aloha
	Need more practice with alanon. (Preview) Rough weekend. I tried to practice my alanon by letting go and detaching. When hubby went to the bar Friday for the night. I did ok but I wish I could have just said ok see you later. NO! I had to get in my head going a million miles an hour. I didn't yell but I said "sweet" manipulative things like...	miss_carol	2	910	Jul 26, 2010 by glad lee
	Need to vent in a safe place... (Preview) Need to vent. There is one thing that I am so sick and tired of about this whole sickness. It's the isolation. I just talked to my husband's father and he told me that the family got together for a bonfire last night at the family camp. It was just an impromptu thing and I KNOW no one meant to hurt my feelings....	looking_for_peace	6	940	Jul 26, 2010 by Aloha
	Master answer for all questions and concerns provided free of charge (Preview) The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype. Some of the symptoms include: 1. Loss of direction 2. Foul vocal emission...	glad	2	805	Jul 26, 2010 by kitty
	Very exhausted (Preview) I've been married to my AH for 21 yrs and everyone is right it only get's worse. I am always angry, my poor children were raised in this Alcoholic Angry Home. I always felt like i can handle this. I am 42 now and now all my 3 children have children and do not like that i feel like i am reliving my childhood. ...	raid3rgirl	2	878	Jul 26, 2010 by Tattyhead
	Daughter Asks Me To Ask Her Grandmother For Some Money (Preview) First let me explain.. My mother has some money that she has on occassion given to my daughter and children in advance when they needed something and said it was part of their inheritance. Although recently my mother doesnt seem to generous with it but she can be a softie when someone presents a situati...	Samsgram	11	1247	Jul 25, 2010 by Diva
	It will sound (read) lame, but I am at a loss........... (Preview) I have been married to this man who has been smoking pot everyday . He also drinks alcohol 3 to 4 times a week. So many promises, "when the children will be born-I will quit", "when the kids are old enough to understand- I will quit" all unkept. Its your fault that I smoke and drink.....	Harvest	10	1020	Jul 25, 2010 by ythannah
	My Son (Preview) Hello Friends, My son decided no military (thank you God), don't misunderstand I think the people who fight every day to save our country are above all of us and I have great respect for them. I just don't want my son that far gone for than long (selfish but I don't care). I thought my son was doing drugs. I...	Andrea12	3	860	Jul 25, 2010 by Andrea12
	Confused about "getting out of the way" (Preview) Hi, I posted about a week ago that my AH moved out while I was at work. He's still gone - he is living in a very scuzzy apartment on an air mattress. Anyway, we have seen each other several times (just last night went to an open talk together), and we talk and text every day, several times a day. He says he need...	stopandchat	10	1020	Jul 25, 2010 by Jennifer
	Lost & Confused (Preview) I saw this Forum and I am new at this. Didn't know if I should even be doing this, but I have kept too much bottled inside and getting more confused if I am losing my sanity or not and maybe some suggestions and opinions. Been with boyfriend for 4 yrs. He drinks approx 4 glasses of Vodka each evening. Gets...	BrokenBunny	8	915	Jul 25, 2010 by ythannah
	another wonderful birthday... (Preview) Another really nice birthday again this year! I enjoyed so much being with my husband & traveling 60 miles to see a movie & get a good lunch @ Red Lobster yesterday! When I got back on the computer this morning, I counted about 13 messages from my FB friends wishing me a happy birthday! I wish I ha...	Hoot Nanny	8	819	Jul 25, 2010 by hotrod
	Take what you like and leave the rest! (Preview) I'm so glad we can take what we like and leave the rest. I've often said alanon is what organized religion-( First Baptist or Methodist Church or whatever) should hope to be. I recently encountered somene who had some good things to say but said it as if they has "arrived" at this all knowing s...	glad	3	1929	Jul 25, 2010 by Jerry F
	Defeated and in Despair and pain (Preview) Hi everyone, I hate feeling so low and depressed but I can not help how I feel. I feel so drained of all energy and emotion I have nothing left to give, it has been a long time since I have felt this bad and I don't want to feel like this, usually I am hopeful, happy and have hope and faith. I usualy am the one to...	Grace M	10	1177	Jul 25, 2010 by Grace M
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.