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enough is enough
(Preview)
Hello to all my old friends, and new ones too! Maybe some of the people who have been posting their comments for a long time.... remember me?? Life is not simple.... though I am trying to see the events that are going on with my sons as answers for them. Maybe they need to start choosing better partners?...
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teddybear
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5
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416
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help??
(Preview)
My fiance is coming over in a little while to talk to me about last night... the drunken stumbling in late at night, the argument, him leaving. He says he still loves me and he is sorry. He actually called in to work this morning. That has NEVER happened. He says he couldn't sleep at all last night. He...
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oklahoma momof5
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13
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759
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Hoping I did the right thing.....
(Preview)
Hi All- My family has a long history of dependency, family secrets with the women as enablers and the men (and a few women) are the 'broken' parties (From what I've read this is pretty common) there's not any specific dependency. It's ranged from physical abuse, methamphetamines, pedophilia, gambl...
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kbbs1
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5
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756
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hello
(Preview)
A year and 8 months ago my daugther decided to live with her dad and as of last Monday she's back with me. It was tough all that time but I made it tru. She found things out for herself. She knows I'm here for her and she came back on her own. Thank you everyone. buick
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buick23
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4
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499
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Who is this sober woman; where is my wife?
(Preview)
My wife of 22 years has been sober 18 months. She's doing great, finding new independence and personal growth. Her personality has changed in the last 3-4 months. She's great with friends, a model mother to our children but distant and unavailable to me. I've never used the words "" an...
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Sandy49203
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9
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1107
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I guess he's leaving me..... =(
(Preview)
Well, after the last couple of weeks of me agonizing over my fiance's strange behavior and increased drinking.... and trying to tell him how I felt with no luck.... he decided to disappear for a day and stumble in late last night..... but he would not talk. Should have just let him go to sleep I guess.......
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oklahoma momof5
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4
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512
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Detaching from an A Friend
(Preview)
Hi have a friend, who lives in the US, I'm in Canada, we met each other as business contacts and struck up a friendship. She admitted to me early on in our friendship that she was an alcoholic and then went on to tell me all her woes, with her addict bf and how he kicked her out and now she's basically homeles...
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thundermother
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3
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722
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I need Sponser Issues ESH!!!!
(Preview)
I am Looking for some Insight... OK, Currantly I have a Sponser, and how it came about, she was at my very 1st meeting, and one of the 1st to confront me, ESH me, Comfort me, and after about a year, I mentioned being ready (I thought ) for a Sponser, and she happily accepted.... SO, before this her & I kep...
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Jozie
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1
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694
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pregnant mom, possesive Adad.
(Preview)
I need to talk about this. Unfortunately, I live in a very rural area (ugh) and the closest meeting is 2 hours away tonight. I'm about 35 weeks pregnant. At about 20 weeks, my ABF relapsed. I moved to Amish country with my dad & stepmom so I could continue through my pregnancy to be a full time student....
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susie56543
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6
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902
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I'm New Here
(Preview)
I look forward to the day when I can be of help to others here. Tonight, I am new, and I could use some support. My son Ben is 30 and is an alcoholic. He also suffers from agoraphobia. Until very recently, he was unable to leave the house. He has received good treatment and is able to make short car rides...
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Terese
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3
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714
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Gentle reminder re: giving advice....
(Preview)
Hi gang.... Just concerned a wee bit of the tone of some of the replies lately.... I believe they are all coming from good intentions and heartfelt, but can we please steer clear of advice giving, wherever possible.... Share your E,S,&H, offer helpful options or food for thought, and offer encou...
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canadianguy
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8
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987
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Happy Thanksgiving Canadians!
(Preview)
Hope you have a great Thanksgiving lots to be grateful for.!!! Kerry
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kerry5
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4
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329
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Not Coping
(Preview)
I havn't been on here in a really long time, My A and I have moved to a new state to be close to his Family. I have no friends or family here and I feel so alone. Things have got worse with my A's drinking and I feel like I'm watching him die in front of me and I'm not coping. For over a week now he has barley eaten a...
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Sam72
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5
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662
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Enabling or saving a life?
(Preview)
Hi All, I'm new here and this is my first post. I thought I needed to solicit opinions from seasoned Al Anoners regarding my level of involvement with my substance abusing (opiates, alcohol, Valium, etc) 27 year old son. He came out of his first rehab in mid-May after hitting what I thought was bottom...
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Fiddleman
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12
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6862
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Feeling Guilty
(Preview)
When my husband's drinking got out of control (almost 2 years ago), I took all of the alcohol out of the house and I stopped drinking in front of him. He has been working on his sobriety for several months now and is doing a great job. I still drink every once in a while (I like my wine), but not around him. O...
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N8SMOM
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6
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687
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Fear and Faith.
(Preview)
Here are some good quotes on the subject: "Faith is the bird that sings when the dawn is still dark." ~ Rabindranath Tagore "Faith is daring the soul to go beyond what the eyes can see." ~ William Newton Clarke "Take the FIRST STEP in faith...you don't have to see the whol...
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Screaming Barbie
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3
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1343
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Tough Love
(Preview)
My 18 year old D who decided she wanted to try to make it on her own is now driving and uninsured and unregistered car. I feel a little bad about it because I had her me today and give me the plate so I can register it to her younger brothers car. She has paid me a total of $175 for insurance for the last year and a...
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Ginger90
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6
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824
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Wash, rinse, repeat
(Preview)
So tonight was an exact repeat of last Friday, which I posted about. ABF was supposed to go to the 8pm AA meeting. Came home at the regular time, but was clearly drunk. Again. I didn't rant and rave. I simply told him he needed to leave. That I made it clear last week that he can do whatever he wants, but he wil...
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jettiesgirl
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5
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728
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He found out about al-anon =(
(Preview)
A few days ago I broke down and shared with him, through a letter, in a very loving way, that his behavior while drinking was really starting to hurt me.... not only during the episodes, but I was completely anxious and fearful of the next episodes I knew were coming. He pretty much tossed it aside, did n...
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oklahoma momof5
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8
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1065
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Difficult Time... Is Someone Willing to be a Temp Sponsor?
(Preview)
I know we are not suppose to be talking about outside help but I don`t have anywhere to bring this and would like to get others opinions please. Since starting Alanon these past few months I decided I could see that my background really is playing a big part in my life. I have 2 adult children that both have...
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Samsgram
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2
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1056
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Need Chair person for Sunday 7pm meeting October 10th 2010
(Preview)
Its thanksgiving weekend for us Canadians and i might not be home in time to chair. i would appreciate it if someone would step up tonight and chair. Thanks kerry (aka kerisha)
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kerry5
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0
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373
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I fell in love not with the person but with their POTENTIAL.
(Preview)
I've been reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. I can relate so much to what she's written, and I'm sure she'd qualify as a great Al-Anon member. I was reading a passage in her book towards the end about her hesitation to return to a relationship after her divorce, and she was writi...
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Aloha
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8
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712
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Making changes, needing ESH
(Preview)
It's taken me a while to get here, but I am finally here....it's over...at least the emotional and mental part anyway. I have come to the realization that although I wanted my ABF to change, he just isnt ready..it's time for me to move on. I have spent the past 8 1/2 years living with insanity, lies, an...
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liljeannie
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5
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684
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Watching myself...
(Preview)
Ugh!! Sometimes discovery isn't a lot of fun. Truely seeing my negative behaviors can be amazing. I read a book a year or so ago that spoke of watching your thoughts, rather than acting on them. Just watch and listen to your mind. I am slowly getting better at it. This morning my mind wants to think a...
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fishinmama
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6
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709
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New and in need of hope and help
(Preview)
Hi, I am a 45 yo mother of 2 who has been involved with an active A for the last 10 years. We live together and one child is his biologically. Since we met, my health, sanity and confidence has been slowly eroding. I am now on anti-anxiety medication and cannot do half of what I used to. I feel like a priso...
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thundermother
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14
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805
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New...and upset
(Preview)
Hello! I was looking for an Al-Anon board because I am really struggling. I grew up with two alcoholic parents who died in a house fire related to alcohol. I won't go into detail, but there was a lot of abuse and it was very difficult. I've worked hard to create a good life. I don't drink at all (an ounce of pr...
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Kate999
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4
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665
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What I did yesterday :)
(Preview)
I was able to NOT let my bf's mom get to me through texting, thanks to the help of my sponsor! I called my sponsor in the middle of the insanity and she helped me through it all. My bf's mom was trying to get me to get up set so I would go home and yell at my A about things. It was my fault for texting her a note o...
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sunflowergirl
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4
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682
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What is a good quote or saying for taking care of yourself when others say you SHOULD do this or that?
(Preview)
When you know what is best but are worried what others will think.
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Screaming Barbie
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12
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1494
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New here (very long)
(Preview)
Hi, my name is Kimmy. I am new here and new to al-anon. I feel like my situation is a little different than most. I have been with my husband for 8 years, but married for 4 years. When I met my husband, he had been sober for a year. Up until recently, he never drank because he knew he was an alcoholic and di...
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kimmy1975
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14
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717
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Raindrops and Rainbows
(Preview)
Yesterday I found myself having one of many difficult days in recent months. Today was a total reversal. It didnt start out that way however. One of the issues I have been struggling with is added weight I have put on over the past year and a half. I complain about it but do little to stop it or reverse i...
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AlaMom
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4
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917
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Having a good night!!!!
(Preview)
I just wanted to post something good for a change. Since I started coming her I have mostly posted when things were not good. I come home tonight and he is sober. I did not say anything about last night or the night before and I think he was waiting for me to say something. He just kept looking at me. Normal...
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snodebb
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3
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551
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It all came to a head last night.... just getting it off my chest... long, sorry.
(Preview)
Hi everyone, You may remember me posting about my fun (fairly sober) Tues. night with my fiance. Well, typically I spent all day Wednesday while he was at work, crying and fearing him coming home and starting to drink again last night. I tried to suck it up because up until now, I did NOT want to have that...
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oklahoma momof5
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7
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745
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Could he be getting better? And is 2 beers too much to drink before driving?
(Preview)
Hi everyone, Last night my fiance and I had a "date" at the state fair, just the two of us. It was really fun!! Right after he got home from work he drank 2 beers while getting cleaned up, which didn't seem like a lot cause he usually drinks like 6-12. Then we went to dinner and to the fair, where...
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oklahoma momof5
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11
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1460
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Not comfortable with al anon meetings.
(Preview)
Another meeting tomorrow, and I'm just not looking forward to going. It seems they all have something to say or a story to relate, the first time I kind of blundered my words, twice I passed and I'm still not comfortable with speaking, maybe I will never be because it's a group, and I've never been good...
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dori711
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14
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1239
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Get those mammograms
(Preview)
(((((Family)))), This is my annual reminder. October is breast cancer awareness month. Time to get those mammograms. MIP men don't shy away from this post. Recovery is about living your life. It's about taking care of ourselves the emotional as well as the physical side. Time to get those ma...
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Karilynn
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2
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444
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Moved Past Yesterday!
(Preview)
Welp... My MIP Family... Today "Seems" to be going MUCH better then yesterday.. After I posted I was still fighting my own demons of trying to regroup and start over, "Control control control" and I wasn't doing so well, so I played Hookie at work, got in my truck, found me some ba...
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Jozie
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3
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961
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Is this living life??
(Preview)
I find myself in the position over the last couple of weeks wondering if I have been showing up for life on a regular basis. Am I doing anything more than the bare minimums to get through each day? Is there something more I should or could be doing? Am I right where I am supposed to be? Being out of work si...
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AlaMom
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2
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966
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What about my kids?
(Preview)
I'm just starting to understand Alanon and as I do I'm starting to see that there are some things that I just can't live with. For example, I feel so awful about myself when I buy alcohol for my AH. It makes me feel so horrible. I also feel awful when I allow him to spend time with my 3 year old. To me, it is s...
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releathe
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5
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816
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Is it wrong to tell my AH I don't like the way he treated me????
(Preview)
I posted last night how my AH was drunk and telling me I was a bad parent. I come home tonight and was telling him how I don't like the way he treated me and it was totaly unacceptable. Was I wrong?? All he could say was What about my feelings. He just kept repeating that over and over. What about my feeling...
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snodebb
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11
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760
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When Someone Comes Out Of Rehab...
(Preview)
My addicted son (age 30) has been in a rehab for the last thirty days, which in my opinion has not been long enough but since his stay was not court ordered there is no way to keep him there if he says he is leaving and he says he is leaving. I am stressed because I can tell he has not taken the steps to recovery se...
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DreamsOver
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6
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1918
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Feeling OK these days....
(Preview)
Things at home are quite, so that helps...the test is when things aren't so great. Also wife and I went to a therapist that we are going to take my daughter to. My wife doesn't like the therapist (I expected that), and to be fair, I didn't find her very warm and cuddly. But she'd been recommended along w...
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mjhyankees
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2
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610
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Detachment=allowing him to be who he is....
(Preview)
Thanks to my new sponser, I am figuring out detachment and concentrating on me. I was thinking that inorder to detach, I had to stop loving my abf and run away. I am realizing that for right now, I don't have to do that. That detachment is allowing my bf to be who he is, and to stop trying to tell him how to l...
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sunflowergirl
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11
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782
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Step 10 who knew...
(Preview)
Step 10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Went to a f2f meeting this weekend and I was introduced to step 10. Who knew this was the message I needed to hear. I've been reacting to (exploding at) other people's negativity in general or personal critic...
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nh girl
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4
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749
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It has been awhile
(Preview)
It has been awhile since I posted a long while put I need to today. My brother in law went into detox yesterday for oxycotin addiction which turned into a 6 gram a day (that is what he tells me) heroine addiction. I have been there to get him his DSHS and helped him get into treatment and I know that I did not Ca...
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Mercy
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6
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615
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probably to soon...
(Preview)
It is probably too soon to share but I feel like I am saying goodbye or something! I am still anxious & scared but I am going to be OK according to all my support system which is growing daily. God bless those who care! I have actually cried over knowing how many people, especially women, who know &...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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715
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New here & new to Al Anon
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I attended my first Al Anon meeting last night. I found it to be a bit uncomfortable but I can definitely see how it would be helpful. So I'm hoping to continue to go. I'm attending Al Anon because of my wife, who is also attending AA. She has been quite irresponsible with drinking over the las...
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usedtobeanyer
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5
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716
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Why does the conversation with a drunk never end!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Preview)
Hubby comes home today drinking of course and wants to know where one of our daughters is. She wasnt feeling well this morning and stayed home she called me later and told me she was going to school because she had a test she couldnt miss. I tell my husband that and he starts going off about why she wanted to...
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snodebb
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7
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669
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I feel like I need a plan...
(Preview)
Now that I've found this place and started learning the process of recovery, I'm finding the thought of being around my AH unbearable. He doesn't drink during the week but he usually starts on Thursday night and continues through the weekend. I honestly cannot stand him when he is drunk and just the...
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releathe
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3
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817
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Letting Go...
(Preview)
I am finally starting to see that maybe I am getting a little bit better. It seems like a very slow process some days but the program works when I honestly try my best to work at it. My DD 18 moved out of our home under poor terms earlier this summer. She is staying with her bf in his parents home. I have been...
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Ginger90
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6
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704
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Overdrive!!!
(Preview)
I just wanted to come and give everyone a heads up - I will be here very little over the next few weeks. Closing the house purchase - don't have the keys yet but very soon I hope. Packing, moving, cleaning, CRAZY work schedule, and business trips - I am going to be heads down for quite awhile being thankfu...
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tlcate
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2
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600
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You're my obsession....
(Preview)
I am trying to become obsessed with myself... ok, maybe that is not a good word, but trying to think of only me and also to finally embrace the first step... I fell last night and snooped and guess what? I felt AWFUL. Just awful and stupid for doing it. I made myself sick, because I let my Abf's mom get to...
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sunflowergirl
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7
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952
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What is HP /GOD to You... Putting Trust in Your HP....How do you see feel Your Higher Power
(Preview)
i am facing some [trials and tribulations] rightnow and have been reading alot to stay calm and to remain strong. Posted this (pasted it below) back in May 2009. As I read it a " C A L M " came over me ( a knowing it is all going to be all right) and i thought to share it again here on the message bo...
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aunitedway
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2
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1113
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God PLEASE Grant me the Serenity!!!
(Preview)
Good Goollie I'm I about to loose my mind.... I swear I have dealt with Every A-Hole within a 20 mile radius today, and I'm about to loose my mind... I mean the Full moon was last week... Come on!!! Most know that I don't get to excited "most" of the time, but this morning my aura is WAY off... I wal...
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Jozie
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4
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2030
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10.02.10 MIP Group Business Meeting Minutes
(Preview)
Chair opened the meeting with the Serenity Prayer. September minutes were approved as written. First item: Meeting schedule. AM MON Shimo TUES xeno WED Iona THURS OPEN FRI Blendergirl SAT OPEN SUN (Spiritual) OPEN PM MON grammie TUES casa WEDS kerisha THURS (Step/tradition) courage...
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casa
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0
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515
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A question about the dayafter a binge.. maybe TMI
(Preview)
Just a question.. is anyone else's A extra, ahem... frisky and demanding about it the next day... It's like clockwork for mine and drives me CRAZY. The LAST think I want to think about doing the day after one of his binges while he sweats beer out his pores and sleeps off his handover on the couch.. Is it...
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MissyPoo
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7
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623
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Learning and growth over the years...
(Preview)
I took some time this evening to read through some older posts and messages of mine, dating all the way back to Feb 2007. More than 3 yrs ago! Have I really been here that long? Wow, some of the anger I had in those messages, I remember those days and how desperate I was for freedom from that anger, pain an...
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Rora
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7
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813
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You know what makes me feel the craziest? Long vent.
(Preview)
Everyday, moment by moment, I am swinging back and forth between thinking, "he's a drunk, no he's not really a drunk, he's getting better, no, he's drinking more than before, I have to leave, I can't leave, I will miss him, I can't stand him, I won't miss him, he's ruining my kids lives, it will ruin...
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oklahoma momof5
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9
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764
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Feeling at peace.
(Preview)
For the past 1 1/12 weeks I have felt at peace. I have not felt this for an amazingly long time and it feels wonderful! My A boyfriend who has switched from alcohol to oxcodone pills doesn't realize that I know what has been going on and I've just been going about my business taking care of the things I bei...
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Holly09
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2
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495
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Pregnant mother with an alcoholic husband
(Preview)
I am currently 8 months pregnant and the mother of a 3 year old. Recently, I came to grips with the fact that my husband is an alcoholic and now I feel like my world is falling apart. I know that being pregnant means that I'm more emotional but I find myself crying all the time. My husband knows that I thin...
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releathe
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5
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1889
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Living life with an alcoholic daddy
(Preview)
I have read a number of websites the last 15 years or so on this topic but i have never posted my story. I also havent read a story that is like mine specifically, so here it goes, maybe my story can help someone else. I am 25 years old and grew up with a dad who couldnt put the bottle down when i was little. F...
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Stace621
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7
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894
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