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panic
(Preview)
I have to get away my sober abf is o.k now lots of supprt and I am on my knees he will not even answer the phone after all the times i was there for him. I am in such pain can not eat trying hard yohurts and stuff never slept last night tried to rest mcuh as can. I am havig panic attacks my parent and brother are tr...
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Tracy
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9
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512
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New Here. Hi.
(Preview)
Hi All, I'm new here so I haven't had the chance to navigate the website much quite yet, but I'll get there. :) While I have never been an active member of Al-Anon, I could have probably began using it since the day I was born. My mother and father are alcoholics/prior drug addicts, and my stepdad is a recov...
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Mrs_B
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8
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792
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WOW!! What a real eye opener!
(Preview)
The kids and I went down to see AH this weekend. After a couple of weeks of feeling lost, lonely, anxious and all, I came to realize this weekend that there was really no need to feel that way. Yes, he spent time with the kids and my Dad on saturday, and they all had a great day. Late in the day on Saturday, AH an...
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Evian
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12
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814
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How have YOU been affected by someone's alcohol/drug addiction?
(Preview)
I'm interested in learning from others the ways they have personally been affected or were affected by another one's addiction and recovery tools if any they have found useful. Making lists helps me come out of denial and help me focus on helping myself. Hopefully others will like this topic too.
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Stillalive2dream
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12
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737
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up then down - long
(Preview)
Just before admitting herself to the hospital my wife ended a 1 week binge by playing beach volleyball with a volleyball social group that she has done a lot of drinking with. One of the guys from the club ended taking her home and then dropping her off in the morning (while I was getting the kids ready f...
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DadtoCandE
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8
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1272
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Brokenness
(Preview)
I am feeling like after I hit my bottom and felt so lost a couple months ago, out of my brokeness is such a rightness. I am finally feeling not only like I will survive being alone, but I will get healthier and comfortable in my own skin for once. I have been working my program and on myself and all of a sudden i...
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flopadopilus
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5
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931
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too young for Alateen, how to help a child?
(Preview)
i'm wondering if there are any books that address the specific needs of a young COA, 6-8 years old? not for my daughter to read, but for me to better understand what she's going through and better be able to help her? (i've got one of those "6 going on 40" kids with a memory like an elepant.) also...
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purpleraven
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8
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1602
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Been Contemplating This for a Long While
(Preview)
I've read and heard numerous times that alcoholism can make us just as insane as our alcoholic. Now what crossed my mind when I read and hear this is this: Did living w/alcoholism makes us nuts, or did we have certain belief systems, and thus behaviors that correlate, lead us to Nutsville? Aren't th...
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GailMichelle
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14
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1070
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Just when things were going well
(Preview)
You might remember my brother, who has been in and out of jail for DUI offenses and probation violations related to alcohol. He was released mid-January, and the first couple of weeks you could hear slurred speech whenever you talked to him on the phone. Sometimes it was sight, others it was severe. Re...
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NCSUgeology
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8
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845
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Guilt
(Preview)
Hi there everyone, it's me again. I am feeling more put together as of late and I know I did the right thing by moving out on my own months ago. I feel stronger and slowly being alone isn't as scary as it once was, I still have my moments, but more than not I am getting more comfy within my own skin. Having had m...
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flopadopilus
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3
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619
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alcohol and sexual desire
(Preview)
This may be a strange one but my A is ONLY interested in sex the day after drinking. I have heard of loss of desire and loss of erection but my A seems to get "juiced up sexually' from drinking. The sad thing is I just want to run away from him because of the old booze smell. I am new to this board but had...
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coco
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5
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1131
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Step Study group - question
(Preview)
My sponsor is starting a step study at her house once a week with 6 women. I'm thinking about going. [Well ... my sponsor has "suggested" that I go - a strong suggestion. Lol. ] For anyone that has a done a step study like this, what is it like? Especially with respect to the 4th and 5th steps...
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White Rabbit
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7
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3747
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Trust in hp finally has happened
(Preview)
I know I have a hp and that I am guided and cared for. That often doesnt' stop me from taking the reigns and doing things on my own. I don't fully trust. It has been a long road. Recently I had the news that I was going to have to move. My business is in my home and the layout of the house makes a large differen...
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clep
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10
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864
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Flashback to old experiences
(Preview)
I'm trying to use my program to handle a situation, but I'm having trouble seeing how to approach it. The back story is that my exAH used to cancel trips at the last minute. We'd have some wonderful trip planned, like a week in Hawaii, and he'd get cold feet and cancel a day or two before. He'd say, "I...
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Mattie
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6
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871
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4 years on
(Preview)
I am coming up to 4 years from leaving the ex A. I'm looking at I had all kinds of timelines and ideas about where I should be in that time. I have not even dated since I left him. I have not really been able to get stable, pay the bills employment. I've had some really awful jobs. I am still living with roomma...
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maresie
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9
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881
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Fed up of being sick and tired!
(Preview)
I'm really struggling with myself. I've stopped blaming other people for the state of my life and can see how I've made choices right down the line that left me open to be hurt and emotionally battered, when other people would have walked away. I'm looking at my life and the state it's in and feel so muc...
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Freya
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3
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892
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i'm stuck! the A who hasn't had a drink in 26 years
(Preview)
my ex-A has been clean and sober for 26 years. i only met him 5 years ago. whenever i read any of the posts her, or the literature, or go to face-to-face meetings, so much of what i hear is people dealing with actively drinking alcoholics, or alcoholics in the process of starting recovery, or alcoholics w...
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purpleraven
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7
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753
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Everyone tells me that my head is in the sand???
(Preview)
My RAH packed up and moved away (like across the country) thought it was God opening the doors for him. Thought it would cure his problems. Thought it was the best thing for himself. Even though it is hard on me, I got left with all of the responsibities (once again). But atleast I get to sleep without chai...
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KimmyJo
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4
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908
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Do I stay or do I go.
(Preview)
I'm waffling. I know this is a decision only I can make. And it's not one to be made lightly or in the heat of the moment. I am seriously considering leaving. I plan of spending the next week considering prayerful all the options in front of me and asking my HP for guidance as I make this decision. I als...
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searching4peace
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3
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835
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"For better or WORSE" that was the vow...
(Preview)
I'd like to think that if the rolls were reversed and I was the alcoholic my husband would stand by me as I am him. But the question for myself is how far will I personally take these vows? What would be my breaking point? Does anyone living with an alcoholic ever define this "breaking point"...
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roonpugs
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11
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1033
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disease
(Preview)
At my meeting tonight we had two new comers, therefore we changed the topic to alcoholism is a disease. everytime this happens my brai says to me oh we have covered this so many times and every time I get adeeper understanding. you see it took me quite a while for it to really sink in that my patner was ill a...
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Tracy
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2
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640
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I'm new. I miss my exabf sooo much. It hurts terribly.
(Preview)
Hi, I've been lurking on here for a while. My story is.. 3.5 yrs off and on with my exbf. We broke up quite a few times...most of the time it was over alcohol. He has never EVER been able to swear off drinking altogether. He can not drink as MUCH..he can go for a while not getting drunk in front of me...but eve...
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drummerchick423
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7
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671
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Angry at a puppy and not liking myself for it.
(Preview)
As I posted a few weeks ago the wife came home with another pedigree puppy for the second time without even talking to me about it. (incidentally she said she needs money for clothes and I feel like telling her "you spent it on the puppy"). Now I fell in love with the Shih Tzu but I can't get into...
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mjhyankees
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15
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962
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Dragging bottom today
(Preview)
Just hate this uncontrolable sadness. Is it worth it? Will it ever change? What is "normal"? Feel very lost and alone. My boundry with my AH is when he picks up a drink I check out for the day physically. I can not be around him when he drinks so a leave. The past three nites I have had to close the s...
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sarebaer
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4
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584
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How to respond??
(Preview)
I went out with the girls tonight. Very rare for me, but it was nice....I called my husband early in the day to make sure he'd be home...He said he would........Well, he didn't come home on time...My mother came over to watch our child which was wonderful of her. Husband left me a voicemail that I didn't...
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Steph444
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8
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739
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just wanted to get ya'al's opinions re: exabf's birthday coming up.
(Preview)
So, a month ago, I definitively told my exabf, "please do not contact me until and unless you get sober." I have been good about not contacting him this whole month. Well, his birthday is coming up on Monday. If you were me, would you send him a card? Just a simple card--no big words or pronounc...
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drummerchick423
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15
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1072
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Perfect joke for my frame of mind right now
(Preview)
My mom just emailed this to me and I had to laugh - fits perfectly with my emotions this morning - hope it makes others laugh, sometimes you gotta laugh, the alternative isn't as much fun! Subject: A woman and a man A woman is sitting on her deck with her husband and she says, "I love you." He asks...
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likemyheart
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3
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577
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going to CA
(Preview)
This may been a little premature but I am going to CA to see my family especially my DAD & sister! Plans are being made as I am writing this--my mom already made flight reservations & I am leaving on the 10th of May & coming back on the 17th! I am excited & nervous at the same time. My mom made...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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650
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My Personal Bill of Rights
(Preview)
My personal bill of rightsI have the right to numerous choices beyond mere survivalI have the right to grieve over what I didn't get that I needed or what I got that I didn't need or wantI have the right to follow my own values and standardsI have the right to recognise and accept my own value system as ap...
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Tigger
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6
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4865
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not taking responsibility for his problem?
(Preview)
Hi all! I haven't posted here in so long. I've been out straight with taking my A boyfriends dad to his treatments and dr.'s appointments and my own 3 children to theirs. I am missing this site. My A boyfriend hasn't had a drink since Halloween and I am very thankful and proud of him for that. He told m...
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Holly09
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6
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682
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Insanity/blaming/lying/lack of emotions
(Preview)
Wow. Where do I start? Me and my exabf have been broke up for several months now. We were together for 3 years. I went through a lot when we were together due to his addiction. Well he cheated on me with his ex-gf who happened to be as he said just "his friend and his pill hook-up". Well I caught him...
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Stillalive2dream
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4
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695
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I like pink
(Preview)
Who knew? I sure didn't. LOL. I have spent so much of my life trying to be who other people want me to be that sometimes I am not sure who I am. I have based every action, opinion and even thought on what response it would get me. I tend to be a bit of a chameleon. Changing colour to best suit my suroundings...
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searching4peace
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9
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835
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Trying to stay strong
(Preview)
Well I have spoken a couple times to the (ex?) abf on the telephone. He wants to see me today, which means a big "I miss you" hug and falling into bed. I told him no. That it doesn't solve anything and will probably just make things worse. It never worked before and will just make us fall back in...
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member922
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2
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707
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Just needing a place to vent
(Preview)
Just stumbled upon this site - thankfully. I have a brother who has been an alcoholic for a very long time. He has a young son and a wife, and has decided to go to rehab - for the third time - today. I dont know what I expect to get out of posting, but Im just so boggled by a slew of emotions and I really dont know wh...
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ConcernedinKS
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5
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738
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Need help with acceptance
(Preview)
I have realized via Step 4-6 that I am very fearful and controlling. It is due to a desire for family. I have picked someone very irresponsible. How can I accept that and move on? My expectations were too high. I have been trying to control the outcome of his lack of responsibility. To think that I did this...
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gladysg
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8
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903
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shelter for someone who doesn't want to quit
(Preview)
I know someone who is currently living with his elderly parents but they can no longer handle him when he has been drinking. They feel like they're enabling him by providing him with a home regardless of his actions, but they cannot in good concience turn him out with nowhere to go. He cannot afford to li...
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username
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7
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863
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Could use some prayer as I think things through
(Preview)
Things had been good around here. He was going to counseling with me, told me that I probably saved his life by getting the alcohol out of our lives, etc. Yet, I always knew in the back of my mind that it was too good to be true. I finally snooped(I know, bad idea) and found an open bottle. It just brings b...
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ilovedogs
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7
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940
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Help
(Preview)
As you know, in addition to my A son that I am always talking about on here, my younger son has a problem too. He is the one that is in the Navy and is in Guam right now while his daughter and wife are with me until the crisis in Japan is over. He has just recently went to a doctor in Guam about his uncontrollable d...
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Gailey
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5
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571
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Realizations of last night... WHY?
(Preview)
It's been awhile since I have posted anything on here and find that I have missed sharing. I have come to a realization, I am a work in progress. Not that this is new but to me but I have not been working my program diligently as I had. So last night I found myself "teasing" my AH about his alcohol p...
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wildthang86
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13
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877
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I made him leave
(Preview)
Well I finally hit my breaking point lastnight and told my AH to leave. I'm tired of the lies and drinking and the toll this is taking on me (and my 2 small boys-who I HOPE haven't been affected yet). Last time we had and "episode" I told him if he wanted to stay in our house that he had to go to the Su...
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floridawife
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5
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785
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Today's thought - Happiness
(Preview)
There is no happiness; there are only moments of happiness. -- Spanish proverb How happy we are right now may hinge on dinnertime - whether it is just before or just after. It may also depend on whether we are examining ourselves to see if we are happy or not. There's nothing like a little introspection t...
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glad lee
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2
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939
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Should have left a lon time ago
(Preview)
I'm finally going to get out, it's been 20 years. I'm sad,anxious, scared and sick but I know it's the right thing to do for myself and my kids. My AH has depressed and disconnected with us for a long, long time now. It makes me feel like I am a bad person. I feel that my close friends and family all know whats g...
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kathyc
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6
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817
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Ashley Judd (Mentions Recovery as part of her healing)
(Preview)
http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/ashley-judd-reveals-sexual-abuse-as-child/6b7uh1s?q=Ashley+Judd&rel=msn&from=en-us_msnhp&form=MSNRLL>1=42010
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Samsgram
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4
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2222
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Why is this so hard?
(Preview)
My AH had his first day back at work yesterday. And I recieved the expected email asking me to get money for him to get beer and smokes after work. And I said no. We are broke at the moment. His time off work to 'quit drinking' has devastated our budget and I have already borrowed $100 from his Mom for gas a...
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searching4peace
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7
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732
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God does for me what I cannot do for myself
(Preview)
I've had a really interesting experience over the last month and thought I'd share. (It's long, sit down with a good cup of coffee or something.) A few weeks ago, I met a guy while hanging out with my boss. We didn't hit it off right away, just kept stealing glances at each other the night we met. I didn't th...
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Aloha
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6
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1605
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Long hard day......
(Preview)
it was such a loooong day and started out way too early. Than my job was over and I came home and went online and read some MIP shares and started smiling and even laughed. I have found some great knowledge and hope here after many a hard or emotionally depleting day. I am so appreciative to everyone who ha...
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flopadopilus
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1
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522
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am i getting worse?
(Preview)
i should start off by saying at this moment in time i am unable to attend f2f meetings unfortunately. i have only been able to go to one but at the current time situation makes it impossible. anyway i have always spent a lot of time anxious/stressing over Ah drinking but lately i find myself worrying abo...
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tweety23
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8
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620
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Am I doing the right things??....
(Preview)
I need help. (Sorry, it's a long post) My husband is an alcoholic. A functional alcoholic, if there is such a thing. He's rarely ever drunk in the "falling down, slurring speech, etc." sense of the word, although he is rarely ever sober by 7:00 p.m. (Not making excuses, just stating facts...
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Justpretending
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7
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910
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Looking for some ESH regarding AH and travel with children
(Preview)
I know no one can give me the answers. I am looking for ESH to help me make healthy and safe choices. My AH wants to take our DD on a business trip with him to show her what he does-- a lovely, educational and bonding experience in the world of "normies." In the alcoholic world, it is much more pr...
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Very Very Tired
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4
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665
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It's been a month..
(Preview)
and nothing has really changed. Just a recap on my previous posts, my AH and I were involved in an argument which resulted in the police being called, and Children's Aid becoming involved (yet again). This is the third time in the past 5 yrs that they have been involved, all relating to his drinking, and...
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Evian
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5
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736
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getting sober = new person
(Preview)
Hi everyone, thought it was about time I posted an update on my situation or my husband's situation... As some of you may remember, there was a lot of crazy 2-6 months back where AH was just insane, lost his hob, was suicidal, physch ward stays, emergency room, became addicted to narcotic pain killers...
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danielle0516
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2
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673
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my mom
(Preview)
i am a 31 year old man writing this becasue i am at a loss,,i cant believe i have to deal with this in my life,,here is my storie.
my mother just turned 60 and she is drinking more than ever, last week she decided to drink and drive and she smashed her car up,,her drinking consists of 3 months silbour,,2 wee...
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southsider39
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6
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909
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So proud of my son!
(Preview)
I was so pleased with my guy! His friend too. He never got mad or upset. Even as they had to put all that fencing in the van and in the uhaul. AND I dug up my 20 foot high bundle of bamboo, they got it in too. I did way too much. I cannot stop when others are working. I did a dumb thing and got stuck on my bum. son help...
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Debilyn
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2
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706
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A simple "CoDA" Thank you
(Preview)
Hello Everyone, As the founder and webmaster of Miracles In Progress I want to extent a personal "Thank You" to each of you for valuing and utilizing the CoDA portion of our site. As we grow in our recoveries from alcoholism, addiction, or being a family member of a loved one who suffers from this di...
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John
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2
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818
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Telling a bit of my story
(Preview)
Hi, I'm new to the forums and am glad to be here. I've been going to al-anon meetings for a year and to coda meetings for a bit less. I've been reading through the posts here and learning a lot about other people's experiences. I met with my sponsor yesterday and completed my seventh step. It felt good...
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Freya
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3
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924
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Sick AH and Guilty me
(Preview)
Those of you who know me from this board will know I have been married to my AH for 39 years and he has been alcohol dependant for the last 6 or so years. Just lately he has been worse than usual. His health has been deteriorating and he has become more and more belligerent and verbally abusive. This last wee...
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Tattyhead
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11
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1001
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One Day at a Time
(Preview)
Woke up this morning with this song in my head, and wanted to share it with you all. My favorite "recovery" song. Whats yours? David
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david62
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8
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937
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Slipping
(Preview)
I've been doing really good at working the program. I've been reading tons of literature, going to meetings, making positive changes. But, Im falling back into old behavior. I start reacting again to my boyfriend when I know he's been drinking. Im losing that confidence I had just a short time ago. I f...
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Corgi2
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5
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709
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Pregnant....now AH wants a divorce
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I haven't been here in a while. However, I need an outlet for this extremely disturbing situation I'm in. Just a little history...AH and I have been married for almost two years - have known each other for three. He had been actively drinking for most of our relationship. He got sober for 9 m...
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stopandchat
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12
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1226
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Going to a meeting shortly...
(Preview)
I am a little nervous as I haven't been in awhile. The breakup with the ABF was completed this afternoon, so I am feeling a bit sad. I let him get angry with me and I didn't say anything negative to him. I am not playing the game anymore. Instead of sitting here and wallowing though, I am keeping the promi...
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member922
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6
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737
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