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This may be a strange one but my A is ONLY interested in sex the day after drinking. I have heard of loss of desire and loss of erection but my A seems to get "juiced up sexually' from drinking. The sad thing is I just want to run away from him because of the old booze smell. I am new to this board but had gone to alanon for 8 years. I guess it is time to be active here...
Sometimes I really wonder if the marriage is worth it. We have been married 37yrs. Some good, some bad.
Aloha Coco...Alcohol does warp the personality, thinking, emotions and behaviors. Sex and Alcohol for me today don't mesh either for lots of reasons. When my alcoholic wife was boozed up the sex might be there but the love sure wasn't. Hmmmm brings up alot of awarenesses. I'm reading what comes next. Keep coming back cause with 8 years I'm sure you have a bunch of recovery to share with us. ((((hugs))))
OMG, I HATE that booze smell. I smelled that, 3 times on my ex in the last few months we were together, and I told him, 3 strikes you're out.
I couldn't even be around him when he smelled like that. I just have to wonder--how much alcohol does one have to drink, to smell like booze???
When he was drunk, my ex would get violent during sex...biting really hard, trying to choke me..we got into arguments over it. I hated it. I never wanted to have sex when he was drunk but unfortunately, he was drunk so much.. :(
In the early days of his drinking my AH would be all "sexed up" but I haven't slept in the same room as him for over 3 years now and he hasn't been capable of anything anyway.
I don't understand. Does he drink daily? The day after drinking is the next day drinking for many/most alcoholics. What you are describing in terms of loss of sexual function would occur when drunk...in the mornings is when he is sober but hungover most likely. There shouldn't be any impairment then and that is why his functioning is normal at those times....If I had to guess.
My alcoholic girlfriend certainly used to be more sexual at all times when she was drinking (drunk, hungover, or relatively sober didn't seem to matter). Since she has been in recovery, we're down to 2-3 times per day from the previous 4-6. That's ok with me, though, it's much better now so I'll take quality over quantity and the quantity is still excellent by normal human standards. She's far more coordinated when she's sober, and that's awesome. Her not flirting with every random dude that says "hello" to her is awesome too, I'll gladly take a slight reduction in sex for a large reduction in that garbage.
She used to want to get it on morning noon and night, but morning action is now mostly reserved for weekends, and lunchbreak fun is down to 2-3 days a week. Oh well, I'll survive somehow.
