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If you've been thru alcoholism you can...
(Preview)
take a tooth pulling...LOL (((MIP))). It's true...there is "some" pain; it's located only in one small spot; once the tooth is gone the cause of the pain is gone and I remind myself the pain is very temporary whereas alcoholism just seems to go on forever. The dental people are all sooo...
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Jerry F
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9
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491
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No Ultimatums
(Preview)
I was reading another post about ultimatums & it got me thinking, I have never given AW an ultimatum. I have never said "if you don't stop drinking I'll ........." If you get drunk at the party I'll.........". Of course I would lecture her after it happened as any good codependent...
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Country Boy
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17
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839
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My baby girl and I had a talk
(Preview)
Sometimes I wish she wasn't so darned dramatic! We talked last night over cookies and milk. I just wanted to make sure she understood what happened to her was wrong. So, I asked her if she remembered the conversation and she did and basically told me the whole thing all over again with all kinds of drama a...
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Amandakay
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8
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639
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Feeling lost, alone, and I don't know what to do!
(Preview)
My husband is an alcoholic. I moved from San Diego to rural Nebraska five years ago; the first year was good, then it all went downhill once I realized my then boyfriend/now husband had a drinking problem. I used to go out with him and drink, even get drunk. Then I moved in with him, and going out became...
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Frogonmytoe
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9
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494
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working it
(Preview)
I will try to cut this long story short..... Some background required knowledge: Paying for an overseas trip so have no spare money at present. Husband who is atrocious at organising thingsMy husbands brothers funeral to pay for and he wants to give $1000 and I say its too much, but how can ya argue wi...
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Oksie
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2
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424
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Jealousy
(Preview)
I wish I could overcome my feelings of jealousy, they seem so silly. Truth is, I wouldn't have him back with a COLLOSAL dowry! But every time I think of my ex "sober" husband (sorry, haven't learned to abbreviate like SOU) with his girlfriend or with our kids or with his girlfriend and our...
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suebama
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8
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858
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Dealing with my AD
(Preview)
Now that my AH has moved back to live with her AFather (she was living out of state for the last 18 months), I am really struggling with setting boundaries with her. On the advice on my sponsor, last night I went to my first Al-Anon meeting specifically for parents. I've been in Al-Anon for over 3 years, bu...
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Green Eyes
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3
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351
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In all our affairs...
(Preview)
While things have improved dramatically at home, I am currently struggling with a very unsatisfying work life at the moment. I came to the realization years ago that my career is not really something that I enjoy and not something that I was put on this earth to do. But, I'm 20 years in and as much as I disl...
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usedtobeanyer
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4
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655
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(Newbie to site)How supportive should I be when he quits again?
(Preview)
My husband over the last year has quit drining, but never said forever or surrendered.....months of no drinking, then drinks and ends up being ugly for our marriage. This time he has told me he knows he can never drink again. I know the importance of support during recovery, but I am reluctant. Why s...
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jennfire
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7
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448
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Feeling very done, is there hope for restoration?
(Preview)
Hi everyone! Yesterday I met with my therapist and she confronted me about how I don't cry about what's going on in my marriage. She asked me why I don't cry and I pretty much told her that crying doesn't get me anywhere except left with a HUGE headache, achy eyes, and a sore nose. Also, it never goes well...
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ilovedogs
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20
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654
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been there, done that...
(Preview)
Hi!
I was here several years ago when I was married to an A who was also a cocaine addict. Looong story short... I left him and divorced him and have completely moved forward in my life. I met someone new and have a fantastic relationship with him and we're planning to get married sometime next year.
My...
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artygirl
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4
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359
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Am I abandoning him?
(Preview)
So, things have been really terrible for the last 3 months. My AH's brother committed suicide in May. This is a horrible tradgedy and on top of it, he and my husband didn't have a great relationship. My AH is racked with guilt because he thinks he could have done somthing to prevent it. He is in a deep...
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almostgivenup
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12
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687
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My mother is gone
(Preview)
This is my first time on this board and I will be attending my first Al-Anon meeting next week. The roller coaster of the last 5 years has reached new heights when it comes to my parents, especially my mother. Both my parents are alcoholics, but my dad stopped drinking 12 years ago and has been sober and c...
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CassieCKA
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4
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404
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Chairperson's Monday Night Al-Anon Meeting Schedule Change
(Preview)
Hello Everyone! It's that time of year for me where everything gets twisted, changed and re-scheduled for me. I am the Regular Chairperson for our Monday Night Al-Anon Meeting in our Chat Room and due to all these changes, I am jumping back to Chairing Tuesday Night Meetings starting next Monday (A...
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lacewing
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2
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276
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Alanon is working!
(Preview)
I have been attending Alanon for over a year and am getting ready to start the steps with my sponsor next month. I wanted to say that this program works! I can't even explain it but it does. I read my literature every morning and evening. And the thing that has made a huge difference is I have been doing...
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willowtree
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4
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462
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Newly remarried and in dire need of advice.
(Preview)
I've never been to one of these forums but I'm desperate for some sage advice. I've only been married for a little over a year and I've already started to become angry and depressed; I fear for the future of my marriage because it's not going to survive if I continue to feel this kind of resentment, anger a...
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Karma73
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26
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736
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How to start?
(Preview)
I don't know where to start. I think my husband is on his way to becoming a fulfledged alcoholic. Right now he is functioning, can go a week or so without drinking with no problems, but feels its necessary to have a drink nearly every night. He hides the empty beer cans, whisky bottles, wine bottles, e...
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Lonely
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10
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579
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May have had somewhat of a breakthrough?
(Preview)
I'm not gonna get my hopes up, I know these things take time, and usually it's a painful recovery. My alcoholic recently told me his cousin is in the hospital with severe alcohol poisoning and will most likely need to undergo surgery on his pancreas. I think it's made things very real, and has scared him...
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fallingdown
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1
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275
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Lets examine LOVE!
(Preview)
What is the definition of Love?? You hear it all the time, but I love Him/Her. We are one. Marriage is forever!Love heals all. All you need is Love.... as we already know, there are different loves, love of our children, our parents, siblings. You can be constantly looking for love. With the goal of it b...
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Bettina
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5
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588
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Alanon around the world
(Preview)
As seen below it seems Alanon helps the whole world. I didn't think I would be able to help my dil in Japan to understand the craziness of Aism but I told her to Google Alanon and she found it. I am so grateful for that because she is trying to control the situation Funny thing...since Japanese language doe...
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Gailey
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2
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318
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Why is it all my fault, no matter what I do? And sometimes he's real fun to be with. Not sure what to do.
(Preview)
I'm new to this board. History... I wasn't raised in an alcoholic family. I dated my husband for 4 years before we married. Due to his work schedule we only saw each other 2-3 times a week and we didn't live together. I know this sounds crazy, but while there must have been some red flags during those 4 y...
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Kate123
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5
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530
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Sponsorship
(Preview)
How do I choose a sponsor on-line?
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suebama
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2
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316
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Still confused
(Preview)
How can I get quick relief? I hurt too much to stand. I'm bitter and hostile. I want my qualifier to suffer, he had a colonoscopy the other day and I hoped they'd perforate his bowel. Instead I just sent him a text asking him if the doctors had finally located his brain. I'm just so angry at him and even...
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suebama
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9
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580
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Just trying to understand alcoholism
(Preview)
I'm in a new relationship- 6 months together. He has recently moved in- we felt it was right- I am starting to see his drinking habits and how self destructive he can be. Last night, he was out for 7 hrs, took money from me without asking and did not answer his texts- i'm sure he was with somebody else. I'm...
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Sad-confused-gf
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10
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711
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Jerry s duckies
(Preview)
hi Jerry, a day or so after you posted about your new little friends I went away to do some step work with some recovery friends, we stayed in a prayer house it was beautiful. I went out into the garden and there was a little pond with a duck and her 9 little duckings. A nun was feeding the ducks I laughed an...
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Tracy
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2
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380
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Anger Vent
(Preview)
Vacation with my mom was great the kids and I had an amazing time and I am so grateful that I was able to do that with them. My mom and I had a great time together lots of laughs and enjoyment. I actually miss her and was pretty emotional when we left. We are back and back to reality. It has not been an easy tr...
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Pushka
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8
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648
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To much growth in al-anon it seems ! haha
(Preview)
Hey Everyone, My name is Jim and I have been a member of Al-Anon for 2.5 years. I cant express how much I am grateful for the fact that my higher power has guided me to this program. I am a 28 year old male. Prior to Al-Anon, I was very angry, sarcastic, bitter, judgemental and gossipy. Everything was always...
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slogan_jim
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1
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432
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Need Some Help!
(Preview)
I'm new to Al-Anon. I haven't been able to make a face to face meeting as I have 2 young children & no childcare for them, so I've came here in hopes that I can get some clarity and support. I've been married to my husband for 15 years. He has always drank, but never realized he was an alcoholic until a...
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lashley6
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4
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578
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SHedding my stinkin thinkin!
(Preview)
The more time i spend in al anon, the more awesome stuff i learn, and I wanted to share this thing i got goin on with ya'll today. I've realized that my thinking is really distorted because i have an initial reaction to be negative about most anything. as soon as i wake up its " oh I'm not doing anythin...
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jorjorjor
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4
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342
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lesson learned
(Preview)
I have been a member of Ala -non for only a short time since 2011. Yet I am a grateful member of Ala-non. When I first came here I was A bitter angry person as many of us are because of alcohol or the drug use of people we love. I have taken this program and applied as best I could to my life. For the past 8 months I h...
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sirchef
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4
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394
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When does the pain end and the healing begin
(Preview)
For those that have moved on from their marriages due to this disease, When does the pain stop!! When do u feel happy again and let go of their sick thinking and your own? I was so strong when I left and after trying to reconcile with him choosing the drink I am a mess. I can't believe I went back and had him cho...
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JJ21
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10
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581
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not knowing how to handle this sit.
(Preview)
ive been obsessing over and over on how i can tell my a/boyfriend that he needs to get him an apartment of his own thatr i really truely need my space back ,sounds horrible dont it,after allowing him back in my door after all the fuss of getting him out of my life the last times.but im starting to stress over...
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silent
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3
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435
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Could someone please help me. I'm confued.
(Preview)
I'm recently divorced which is something I'd wanted for a long, long time. It started out as a "friendly" break, but he has reunited with his old girlfriend from high school and they are deeply in love. I don't understand why I am so jealous nor what to do about it. I almost feel like stalk...
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suebama
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8
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583
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Today I am grateful
(Preview)
I am grateful that we have medical and dental insurance (no cavities for my son today!!! Yay!)
I am grateful that my house is a mess today because I spent the time talking to my teenage son (gasp! He talks?) and playing with my daughter on the Wii.
I am grateful that my work is so understanding and allo...
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dragonflys
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4
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266
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God (or HP) Works In Mysterious Ways
(Preview)
Was just thinking how I was led to this board back in February and how it was without a doubt an answer to a prayer. Around that same time, I realized that I needed to go back to work because my AH was falling behind in the bills. A friend of mine had told me about a job with an attorney a couple of months before...
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WornOutMrsFixIt
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4
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371
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Blocked Facebook...
(Preview)
I blocked my STBXAH from facebook after "the event that changed everything"... and I am finding myself wondering if he has said anything on facebook. I want to unblock him just so I can stalk his facebook page - but I know that I'd have to wait 24 or 48 hours before I could block him again... I al...
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Amandakay
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4
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538
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Is there such a thing as a Happy Alcoholic?
(Preview)
We always hear them described as being racked with guilt and shame and I wonder if this is really true with all. My Ex A is a happy go lucky drunk at the bar and until something does not go his way and then he becomes a mad man. He has managed four DUI, jail time and spent several years in prison back in his tw...
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JJ21
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8
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607
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I am not sure what to do...
(Preview)
A partner finally left 5 days ago. He rented a small mobile home in a sweet little park that is just right for him. Yesterday, I stopped by just to make sure he is all right...(mistake, I know) But when he drinks, he drinks enormous amounts of everything, so I am concerned he may die one day from overdos...
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Diva
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10
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580
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Scared for myself and kids
(Preview)
Hello, I'm not sure exactely what I am looking for, but, I am here, and I do feel a need to tell my story. So hear it is, for anyone who wants to listen. My husband is a binge drinker. He doesn't drink every day, but it sure does seem like it more often than not lately. When he does drink, he cannot stop himsel...
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lostbliss83
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4
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511
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Food for thought
(Preview)
So my A has stayed relatively sober for the past year... 2 slips that I know of. He did it without AA (he wants no part of their beliefs). He is currently attending MANDATORY AA meetings 1x per week towards getting his license back, as well as the 1x per week 3 hour session with counselor (also mandat...
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ELEKTRAWMN
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4
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342
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My first Al-Anon Convention......
(Preview)
Hi, A couple of days ago I attended my first Al-Anon convention, I've been to an AA one before but I didn't get much from it. But on Sunday a small group of us drove the several hours to this convention. It was so uplifting and something one of the speakers shared really resonated with me. I just wanted t...
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UK Jane
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2
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294
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One week later
(Preview)
I've been gone from home for a week. My relapsing AH has made many calls asking me to come over, come home, and call him back. I haven't answered his calls or returned his messages. In those messages his moods seem to be all over the place. I had made the decision that I wasn't going to talk to him because h...
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WornOutMrsFixIt
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11
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533
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Thrown a curveball...
(Preview)
Things have been going very well with my wife's recovery. She's been sober, as far as I know, since Easter, and beyond being just sober she seems very together and well adjusted. She's made some very close friends in her program and that seems to have made a tremendous difference for her. I won't lie tha...
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usedtobeanyer
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7
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583
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Is it worth bringing up?
(Preview)
We are going threw a financial rough patch at the moment. We have not bought food in over a month. I eat breakfast every morning thanks to wonderful back yard chickens. We have killed a few and put them in the freezer too. But i have gone 2 weeks without eating lunch at work and being sick everyday because o...
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HoofnIt
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8
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460
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feeling a little sad for myselfhaI
(Preview)
My A "Friend" is pulling away from me.. and I know it is for his own good..he is trying to stay on track with his sobrieety and since it has only been 6 months he is avoiding a relationshipbecause he has to be selfish right now to stay clean. I am so proud of him for knowing that whay he needs to do to...
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flyagain
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2
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466
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What would you give up for Happiness???
(Preview)
Ok Peeps... I Friend of Mine Past this on to me, and Really Gave me alot to Think about... So Thought I would Share...(Hope thats OK..... Not Sure about you all but it Definately sounds like it Fits Here! So I have Decided to Place it above my Desk so I Can Work on it! That Last one was a BIGGIE.... I Strugg...
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Jozie
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6
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602
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Rescuing my ACOA sister
(Preview)
I feel like crying right now. I was in a great mood but I have been affected by my sister's untreated disease. I have an unrecovered ACOA sister who has been stuck in depression for several years. She phones me often for help and I do my best to give her my ESH, but often she seems to just want to stay in the dar...
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Tigger
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4
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546
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Fear - Vent
(Preview)
My phone is having a bad 24 hours. I tried to make it better by calling a list of people but nobody is answering. And the texts keep rolling in, at first just jibberish to me like comments about blue skies and pain that developed into wanting to have breakfast and what I feel is threatening, I am on my way, I...
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Jennifer
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5
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519
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Resentment
(Preview)
I am angry and disappointed with myself today. I have endeavoured to maintain a friendly relationship with my exA, but last night a whole load of resentment and anger came out. He was drinking of course, why should I expect differently and normally I am good at maintaining distance in this situation b...
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flinn66
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10
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820
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He blabbed to everyone!
(Preview)
So, my soon to be ex alcoholic molested my daughter and now has blabbed to everyone who knows us mutually that I am accusing him of this horrible things that he would never do and that we watch porn together... WHAT!!?? First of all, he should have never talked to anyone about it, I sure didn't... why woul...
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Amandakay
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9
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669
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did I offer an unfair ultimatum?
(Preview)
My husband is an alchoholic, he says he has "issues with alchohol", but he's a drunk, he drinks hard liquor on schedule every other day to the point of passing out. After about 7 years of this routine and endless 2 to 3 hour lectures of which he never remembers, I have put my perverbial foot d...
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cora
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14
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4807
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Just Empty
(Preview)
After 6 yrs I think its finally over. My head wants this, my heart does not. Its really quiet at home without him here, without the drama, without all the chaos. I am lonely with him and even lonelier without him. There has been so much drama lately soomething in me broke. Literally broke. It was so ugly an...
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IWannaFly
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13
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608
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Fellow company
(Preview)
Can someone tell me where, or if there is a site that is made for recovering relationships. Irecently became single, and im looking for someone who can understand what im going thru because of my addiction.I want to be involved with a woman who dosen't drink, or drug. Any, and all information would be a...
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crazzzycoup1973
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3
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375
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Staying together even if he drinks--looking for support
(Preview)
I am aching to tell my story and this is the only place I know where I may be able to tell it. I'm looking for connections with others who can relate and offer mutual support. We live in Ethiopia where there is no AA or Al-Anon. Email and each other are our options for support right now. I love my husband an...
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peppermintnginger
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16
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614
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my responsibility
(Preview)
Hi all I am feeling good would come and share why!! I have been working through the steps and I am going away this weekend with recovery friends. My ex abf has been back in contact and I was starting to get a bit nervous, however something has changed. He was txting and ringing early hours this morning, I...
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Tracy
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6
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384
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Husband in rehab... now what?
(Preview)
My husband is an addict and has been at a rehab facility for 6 days now. The events that led him there nearly destroyed me... it has been 4 years of isolated hell. Our relationship has broken down to such a degree that I am really afraid it might be irrepairable. I love him but my trust and faith in him is in ta...
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Kismet
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6
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1497
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Tradition 8
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t50391551/alanon-tradition-8/
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hotrod
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0
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483
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Someone slap me!
(Preview)
A exAF has been getting calls to our home number now about his Handyman business. I haven't answered the calls, but started feeling bad for the customers that relied on him. So, I emailed him the other day asking him to please send out a mass email to all of his customers telling them he is no longer in busi...
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katfshh
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17
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655
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Nervous Breakdown!?
(Preview)
I don't want to smile at anyone, I don't want the friendly-polite-fake, hi how are yas, I'm good and you! None of it... i just want to go away, far far away and just be gone!... I'm just having such a tough day.. Im at work and have to smile and be friendly all day and all I want to do is crawl in a ball on the floo...
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Amandakay
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11
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640
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Dunno if I'm in the right place, or even supposed to be posting here...
(Preview)
Okay so... I have been getting really fed up, and I don't really have anyone to turn to. I started googling how I can help an alcoholic in my life and I found a lot if info on Al-Anon Family Groups, but I'm in quite bad health and wasn't sure if I could make it to a meeting anytime soon, and I need to talk to someo...
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fallingdown
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9
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550
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