Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

WornOutMrsFixIt · WornOutMrsFixIt

I am sitting here surrounded in bills trying to juggle how to pay them and noticed that the ONE that I asked my husband to pay last month didn't get paid and now we owe for two months. I also realized that he went from making close to six figures to making @$20,000 last year. He had conveniently filed for a...

Oksie · Oksie

Hopefully a brief one. In my mind, I have my wonderful loving husband whom I adore, and his evil twin... the addict.. who comes homes in his place every now and then. Last night, the addict came to visit, but as he hadn't been here for a while, he was on his best behaviour. I came home to a stoned husband. Th...

Kismet · Kismet

The more I listen to people and read stories, the more I wonder if it is possible for alcoholics to recover? I think I know of one happy ending and it scares me. I know that my happiness is my responsibility but I am really worried that rehab doesn't seem to have a very good success rate for the alcoholics.....

Debilyn · Debilyn

You know how we say we can choose how we react to something? I was tortured by the past losses almost every day. A very wise woman showed me some scriptures that said we are to be in the present and look ahead! Wow hmmm. So for awhile now if those creepy past things come into my head I stop it and say I am here now...

Gailey · Gailey

As I have told you before my oldest A son has just celebrated his 1st AA anniversary. I am so grateful for that. He and I attend our meetings on Saturday evenings as much as possible. He goes upstains...I go downstairs I have always known my younger son had a problem. I have even labeled him an A the last co...

Pipper · Pipper

Hi everyone I just decided to join the boards sometime it's hard to get to meetings.my husband of 28 years had 19 years sobriety when he slipped it has been a fast decline I've been in alanon for 1 year and just trying to get my head together I'm having such a hard time of detaching. My fear just keeps my mind...

suebama · suebama

I dreamed last night that my ex AH came to me and told me how much he missed me and begged me back. It was a warm and delicious dream, almost like a romance novel. When I woke up and realized it was just a dream, I almost sank into despair immediately. However, I asked myself if I was going to let a stupid dre...

pineapple · pineapple

I'm feeling a little sentimental tonight. Things are finally looking up for me. My A is planning to go back to the U.S. to live, has a flight booked at the end of the month. This has me on a roller coaster of emotions-happy, sad, hurt, glad. But overall I know it's the best thing for both of us. I'm finally ab...

daisy31 · daisy31

How do you successfully have a relationship with a dysfunctional family (parents/siblings)? I want to have a relationship with them but they seem to want to enmesh with me. I have gotten really healthy from creating time and distance and I have gotten pretty strong by keeping my distance. Now th...

pinkchip · pinkchip

I know this is academic and I didn't write it - it's not alanon but actually I think some of the ideas from Alanon and ACOA shaped this form of marital/relationship therapy. Again, there have been many posts about how futile therapy is with an active alcoholic, but this does offer some insight into why...

Kismet · Kismet

I don't know how to cope any more. The stress of getting my husband to rehab and the years of the rollercoaster that comes with living with my AH have shattered me. Now that he is away and I am here trying to run my business and look after my two kids who are 1 and 3. The youngest is teething so I get no sleep at ni...

KLotus · KLotus

My AH began drinking again 9 weeks ago after one year of, well, dry-drunking. We separated a few months ago, and began reconciling after a couple of months, though he's not back home yet. He is now saying he isn't an alcoholic, that I have caused him to treat me badly (he said he's not an abuser typicall...

Jerry F · Jerry F

take a tooth pulling...LOL (((MIP))). It's true...there is "some" pain; it's located only in one small spot; once the tooth is gone the cause of the pain is gone and I remind myself the pain is very temporary whereas alcoholism just seems to go on forever. The dental people are all sooo...

Country Boy · Country Boy

I was reading another post about ultimatums & it got me thinking, I have never given AW an ultimatum. I have never said "if you don't stop drinking I'll ........." If you get drunk at the party I'll.........". Of course I would lecture her after it happened as any good codependent...

Amandakay · Amandakay

Sometimes I wish she wasn't so darned dramatic! We talked last night over cookies and milk. I just wanted to make sure she understood what happened to her was wrong. So, I asked her if she remembered the conversation and she did and basically told me the whole thing all over again with all kinds of drama a...

Frogonmytoe · Frogonmytoe

My husband is an alcoholic. I moved from San Diego to rural Nebraska five years ago; the first year was good, then it all went downhill once I realized my then boyfriend/now husband had a drinking problem. I used to go out with him and drink, even get drunk. Then I moved in with him, and going out became...

Oksie · Oksie

I will try to cut this long story short..... Some background required knowledge: Paying for an overseas trip so have no spare money at present. Husband who is atrocious at organising thingsMy husbands brothers funeral to pay for and he wants to give $1000 and I say its too much, but how can ya argue wi...

suebama · suebama

I wish I could overcome my feelings of jealousy, they seem so silly. Truth is, I wouldn't have him back with a COLLOSAL dowry! But every time I think of my ex "sober" husband (sorry, haven't learned to abbreviate like SOU) with his girlfriend or with our kids or with his girlfriend and our...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

Now that my AH has moved back to live with her AFather (she was living out of state for the last 18 months), I am really struggling with setting boundaries with her. On the advice on my sponsor, last night I went to my first Al-Anon meeting specifically for parents. I've been in Al-Anon for over 3 years, bu...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

While things have improved dramatically at home, I am currently struggling with a very unsatisfying work life at the moment. I came to the realization years ago that my career is not really something that I enjoy and not something that I was put on this earth to do. But, I'm 20 years in and as much as I disl...

jennfire · jennfire

My husband over the last year has quit drining, but never said forever or surrendered.....months of no drinking, then drinks and ends up being ugly for our marriage. This time he has told me he knows he can never drink again. I know the importance of support during recovery, but I am reluctant. Why s...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Hi everyone! Yesterday I met with my therapist and she confronted me about how I don't cry about what's going on in my marriage. She asked me why I don't cry and I pretty much told her that crying doesn't get me anywhere except left with a HUGE headache, achy eyes, and a sore nose. Also, it never goes well...

artygirl · artygirl

Hi! I was here several years ago when I was married to an A who was also a cocaine addict. Looong story short... I left him and divorced him and have completely moved forward in my life. I met someone new and have a fantastic relationship with him and we're planning to get married sometime next year. My...

almostgivenup · almostgivenup

So, things have been really terrible for the last 3 months. My AH's brother committed suicide in May. This is a horrible tradgedy and on top of it, he and my husband didn't have a great relationship. My AH is racked with guilt because he thinks he could have done somthing to prevent it. He is in a deep...

CassieCKA · CassieCKA

This is my first time on this board and I will be attending my first Al-Anon meeting next week. The roller coaster of the last 5 years has reached new heights when it comes to my parents, especially my mother. Both my parents are alcoholics, but my dad stopped drinking 12 years ago and has been sober and c...

lacewing · lacewing

Hello Everyone! It's that time of year for me where everything gets twisted, changed and re-scheduled for me. I am the Regular Chairperson for our Monday Night Al-Anon Meeting in our Chat Room and due to all these changes, I am jumping back to Chairing Tuesday Night Meetings starting next Monday (A...

willowtree · willowtree

I have been attending Alanon for over a year and am getting ready to start the steps with my sponsor next month. I wanted to say that this program works! I can't even explain it but it does. I read my literature every morning and evening. And the thing that has made a huge difference is I have been doing...

Karma73 · Karma73

I've never been to one of these forums but I'm desperate for some sage advice. I've only been married for a little over a year and I've already started to become angry and depressed; I fear for the future of my marriage because it's not going to survive if I continue to feel this kind of resentment, anger a...

Lonely · Lonely

I don't know where to start. I think my husband is on his way to becoming a fulfledged alcoholic. Right now he is functioning, can go a week or so without drinking with no problems, but feels its necessary to have a drink nearly every night. He hides the empty beer cans, whisky bottles, wine bottles, e...

fallingdown · fallingdown

I'm not gonna get my hopes up, I know these things take time, and usually it's a painful recovery. My alcoholic recently told me his cousin is in the hospital with severe alcohol poisoning and will most likely need to undergo surgery on his pancreas. I think it's made things very real, and has scared him...

Bettina · Bettina

What is the definition of Love?? You hear it all the time, but I love Him/Her. We are one. Marriage is forever!Love heals all. All you need is Love.... as we already know, there are different loves, love of our children, our parents, siblings. You can be constantly looking for love. With the goal of it b...

Gailey · Gailey

As seen below it seems Alanon helps the whole world. I didn't think I would be able to help my dil in Japan to understand the craziness of Aism but I told her to Google Alanon and she found it. I am so grateful for that because she is trying to control the situation Funny thing...since Japanese language doe...

Kate123 · Kate123

I'm new to this board. History... I wasn't raised in an alcoholic family. I dated my husband for 4 years before we married. Due to his work schedule we only saw each other 2-3 times a week and we didn't live together. I know this sounds crazy, but while there must have been some red flags during those 4 y...

suebama · suebama

How do I choose a sponsor on-line?

suebama · suebama

How can I get quick relief? I hurt too much to stand. I'm bitter and hostile. I want my qualifier to suffer, he had a colonoscopy the other day and I hoped they'd perforate his bowel. Instead I just sent him a text asking him if the doctors had finally located his brain. I'm just so angry at him and even...

Sad-confused-gf · Sad-confused-gf

I'm in a new relationship- 6 months together. He has recently moved in- we felt it was right- I am starting to see his drinking habits and how self destructive he can be. Last night, he was out for 7 hrs, took money from me without asking and did not answer his texts- i'm sure he was with somebody else. I'm...

Tracy · Tracy

hi Jerry, a day or so after you posted about your new little friends I went away to do some step work with some recovery friends, we stayed in a prayer house it was beautiful. I went out into the garden and there was a little pond with a duck and her 9 little duckings. A nun was feeding the ducks I laughed an...

Pushka · Pushka

Vacation with my mom was great the kids and I had an amazing time and I am so grateful that I was able to do that with them. My mom and I had a great time together lots of laughs and enjoyment. I actually miss her and was pretty emotional when we left. We are back and back to reality. It has not been an easy tr...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey Everyone, My name is Jim and I have been a member of Al-Anon for 2.5 years. I cant express how much I am grateful for the fact that my higher power has guided me to this program. I am a 28 year old male. Prior to Al-Anon, I was very angry, sarcastic, bitter, judgemental and gossipy. Everything was always...

lashley6 · lashley6

I'm new to Al-Anon. I haven't been able to make a face to face meeting as I have 2 young children & no childcare for them, so I've came here in hopes that I can get some clarity and support. I've been married to my husband for 15 years. He has always drank, but never realized he was an alcoholic until a...

jorjorjor · jorjorjor

The more time i spend in al anon, the more awesome stuff i learn, and I wanted to share this thing i got goin on with ya'll today. I've realized that my thinking is really distorted because i have an initial reaction to be negative about most anything. as soon as i wake up its " oh I'm not doing anythin...

sirchef · sirchef

I have been a member of Ala -non for only a short time since 2011. Yet I am a grateful member of Ala-non. When I first came here I was A bitter angry person as many of us are because of alcohol or the drug use of people we love. I have taken this program and applied as best I could to my life. For the past 8 months I h...

JJ21 · JJ21

For those that have moved on from their marriages due to this disease, When does the pain stop!! When do u feel happy again and let go of their sick thinking and your own? I was so strong when I left and after trying to reconcile with him choosing the drink I am a mess. I can't believe I went back and had him cho...

silent · silent

ive been obsessing over and over on how i can tell my a/boyfriend that he needs to get him an apartment of his own thatr i really truely need my space back ,sounds horrible dont it,after allowing him back in my door after all the fuss of getting him out of my life the last times.but im starting to stress over...

suebama · suebama

I'm recently divorced which is something I'd wanted for a long, long time. It started out as a "friendly" break, but he has reunited with his old girlfriend from high school and they are deeply in love. I don't understand why I am so jealous nor what to do about it. I almost feel like stalk...

dragonflys · dragonflys

I am grateful that we have medical and dental insurance (no cavities for my son today!!! Yay!) I am grateful that my house is a mess today because I spent the time talking to my teenage son (gasp! He talks?) and playing with my daughter on the Wii. I am grateful that my work is so understanding and allo...

WornOutMrsFixIt · WornOutMrsFixIt

Was just thinking how I was led to this board back in February and how it was without a doubt an answer to a prayer. Around that same time, I realized that I needed to go back to work because my AH was falling behind in the bills. A friend of mine had told me about a job with an attorney a couple of months before...

Amandakay · Amandakay

I blocked my STBXAH from facebook after "the event that changed everything"... and I am finding myself wondering if he has said anything on facebook. I want to unblock him just so I can stalk his facebook page - but I know that I'd have to wait 24 or 48 hours before I could block him again... I al...

JJ21 · JJ21

We always hear them described as being racked with guilt and shame and I wonder if this is really true with all. My Ex A is a happy go lucky drunk at the bar and until something does not go his way and then he becomes a mad man. He has managed four DUI, jail time and spent several years in prison back in his tw...

Diva · Diva

A partner finally left 5 days ago. He rented a small mobile home in a sweet little park that is just right for him. Yesterday, I stopped by just to make sure he is all right...(mistake, I know) But when he drinks, he drinks enormous amounts of everything, so I am concerned he may die one day from overdos...

lostbliss83 · lostbliss83

Hello, I'm not sure exactely what I am looking for, but, I am here, and I do feel a need to tell my story. So hear it is, for anyone who wants to listen. My husband is a binge drinker. He doesn't drink every day, but it sure does seem like it more often than not lately. When he does drink, he cannot stop himsel...

ELEKTRAWMN · ELEKTRAWMN

So my A has stayed relatively sober for the past year... 2 slips that I know of. He did it without AA (he wants no part of their beliefs). He is currently attending MANDATORY AA meetings 1x per week towards getting his license back, as well as the 1x per week 3 hour session with counselor (also mandat...

UK Jane · UK Jane

Hi, A couple of days ago I attended my first Al-Anon convention, I've been to an AA one before but I didn't get much from it. But on Sunday a small group of us drove the several hours to this convention. It was so uplifting and something one of the speakers shared really resonated with me. I just wanted t...

WornOutMrsFixIt · WornOutMrsFixIt

I've been gone from home for a week. My relapsing AH has made many calls asking me to come over, come home, and call him back. I haven't answered his calls or returned his messages. In those messages his moods seem to be all over the place. I had made the decision that I wasn't going to talk to him because h...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Things have been going very well with my wife's recovery. She's been sober, as far as I know, since Easter, and beyond being just sober she seems very together and well adjusted. She's made some very close friends in her program and that seems to have made a tremendous difference for her. I won't lie tha...

HoofnIt · HoofnIt

We are going threw a financial rough patch at the moment. We have not bought food in over a month. I eat breakfast every morning thanks to wonderful back yard chickens. We have killed a few and put them in the freezer too. But i have gone 2 weeks without eating lunch at work and being sick everyday because o...

flyagain · flyagain

My A "Friend" is pulling away from me.. and I know it is for his own good..he is trying to stay on track with his sobrieety and since it has only been 6 months he is avoiding a relationshipbecause he has to be selfish right now to stay clean. I am so proud of him for knowing that whay he needs to do to...

Jozie · Jozie

Ok Peeps... I Friend of Mine Past this on to me, and Really Gave me alot to Think about... So Thought I would Share...(Hope thats OK..... Not Sure about you all but it Definately sounds like it Fits Here! So I have Decided to Place it above my Desk so I Can Work on it! That Last one was a BIGGIE.... I Strugg...

Tigger · Tigger

I feel like crying right now. I was in a great mood but I have been affected by my sister's untreated disease. I have an unrecovered ACOA sister who has been stuck in depression for several years. She phones me often for help and I do my best to give her my ESH, but often she seems to just want to stay in the dar...

Jennifer · Jennifer

My phone is having a bad 24 hours. I tried to make it better by calling a list of people but nobody is answering. And the texts keep rolling in, at first just jibberish to me like comments about blue skies and pain that developed into wanting to have breakfast and what I feel is threatening, I am on my way, I...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	My Blood Is Boiling (Preview) I am sitting here surrounded in bills trying to juggle how to pay them and noticed that the ONE that I asked my husband to pay last month didn't get paid and now we owe for two months. I also realized that he went from making close to six figures to making @$20,000 last year. He had conveniently filed for a...	WornOutMrsFixIt	10	703	Aug 19, 2012 by WornOutMrsFixIt
	A visit from the addict (Preview) Hopefully a brief one. In my mind, I have my wonderful loving husband whom I adore, and his evil twin... the addict.. who comes homes in his place every now and then. Last night, the addict came to visit, but as he hadn't been here for a while, he was on his best behaviour. I came home to a stoned husband. Th...	Oksie	5	442	Aug 19, 2012 by Pushka
	Any rehab success stories? (Preview) The more I listen to people and read stories, the more I wonder if it is possible for alcoholics to recover? I think I know of one happy ending and it scares me. I know that my happiness is my responsibility but I am really worried that rehab doesn't seem to have a very good success rate for the alcoholics.....	Kismet	8	602	Aug 19, 2012 by pineapple
	Changing it (Preview) You know how we say we can choose how we react to something? I was tortured by the past losses almost every day. A very wise woman showed me some scriptures that said we are to be in the present and look ahead! Wow hmmm. So for awhile now if those creepy past things come into my head I stop it and say I am here now...	Debilyn	2	368	Aug 19, 2012 by pineapple
	HP has found a way to keep me going to my Alanon meetings (Preview) As I have told you before my oldest A son has just celebrated his 1st AA anniversary. I am so grateful for that. He and I attend our meetings on Saturday evenings as much as possible. He goes upstains...I go downstairs I have always known my younger son had a problem. I have even labeled him an A the last co...	Gailey	1	1643	Aug 18, 2012 by Mattie
	New to forum (Preview) Hi everyone I just decided to join the boards sometime it's hard to get to meetings.my husband of 28 years had 19 years sobriety when he slipped it has been a fast decline I've been in alanon for 1 year and just trying to get my head together I'm having such a hard time of detaching. My fear just keeps my mind...	Pipper	6	470	Aug 18, 2012 by ilovedogs
	Sweet dream or nightmare (Preview) I dreamed last night that my ex AH came to me and told me how much he missed me and begged me back. It was a warm and delicious dream, almost like a romance novel. When I woke up and realized it was just a dream, I almost sank into despair immediately. However, I asked myself if I was going to let a stupid dre...	suebama	7	422	Aug 18, 2012 by likemyheart
	Thanks/To RLC (Preview) I'm feeling a little sentimental tonight. Things are finally looking up for me. My A is planning to go back to the U.S. to live, has a flight booked at the end of the month. This has me on a roller coaster of emotions-happy, sad, hurt, glad. But overall I know it's the best thing for both of us. I'm finally ab...	pineapple	7	410	Aug 18, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Dealing with family (Preview) How do you successfully have a relationship with a dysfunctional family (parents/siblings)? I want to have a relationship with them but they seem to want to enmesh with me. I have gotten really healthy from creating time and distance and I have gotten pretty strong by keeping my distance. Now th...	daisy31	2	365	Aug 18, 2012 by abbyal
	What do you guys think of this? (Preview) I know this is academic and I didn't write it - it's not alanon but actually I think some of the ideas from Alanon and ACOA shaped this form of marital/relationship therapy. Again, there have been many posts about how futile therapy is with an active alcoholic, but this does offer some insight into why...	pinkchip	7	587	Aug 17, 2012 by Debilyn
	Nervous breakdown (Preview) I don't know how to cope any more. The stress of getting my husband to rehab and the years of the rollercoaster that comes with living with my AH have shattered me. Now that he is away and I am here trying to run my business and look after my two kids who are 1 and 3. The youngest is teething so I get no sleep at ni...	Kismet	8	688	Aug 17, 2012 by Kismet
	Here we go again (Preview) My AH began drinking again 9 weeks ago after one year of, well, dry-drunking. We separated a few months ago, and began reconciling after a couple of months, though he's not back home yet. He is now saying he isn't an alcoholic, that I have caused him to treat me badly (he said he's not an abuser typicall...	KLotus	8	453	Aug 17, 2012 by nana1970
	If you've been thru alcoholism you can... (Preview) take a tooth pulling...LOL (((MIP))). It's true...there is "some" pain; it's located only in one small spot; once the tooth is gone the cause of the pain is gone and I remind myself the pain is very temporary whereas alcoholism just seems to go on forever. The dental people are all sooo...	Jerry F	9	495	Aug 17, 2012 by Country Boy
	No Ultimatums (Preview) I was reading another post about ultimatums & it got me thinking, I have never given AW an ultimatum. I have never said "if you don't stop drinking I'll ........." If you get drunk at the party I'll.........". Of course I would lecture her after it happened as any good codependent...	Country Boy	17	862	Aug 17, 2012 by All I can be
	My baby girl and I had a talk (Preview) Sometimes I wish she wasn't so darned dramatic! We talked last night over cookies and milk. I just wanted to make sure she understood what happened to her was wrong. So, I asked her if she remembered the conversation and she did and basically told me the whole thing all over again with all kinds of drama a...	Amandakay	8	645	Aug 17, 2012 by Amandakay
	Feeling lost, alone, and I don't know what to do! (Preview) My husband is an alcoholic. I moved from San Diego to rural Nebraska five years ago; the first year was good, then it all went downhill once I realized my then boyfriend/now husband had a drinking problem. I used to go out with him and drink, even get drunk. Then I moved in with him, and going out became...	Frogonmytoe	9	498	Aug 17, 2012 by Frogonmytoe
	working it (Preview) I will try to cut this long story short..... Some background required knowledge: Paying for an overseas trip so have no spare money at present. Husband who is atrocious at organising thingsMy husbands brothers funeral to pay for and he wants to give $1000 and I say its too much, but how can ya argue wi...	Oksie	2	428	Aug 17, 2012 by Jackie11
	Jealousy (Preview) I wish I could overcome my feelings of jealousy, they seem so silly. Truth is, I wouldn't have him back with a COLLOSAL dowry! But every time I think of my ex "sober" husband (sorry, haven't learned to abbreviate like SOU) with his girlfriend or with our kids or with his girlfriend and our...	suebama	8	864	Aug 17, 2012 by JJ21
	Dealing with my AD (Preview) Now that my AH has moved back to live with her AFather (she was living out of state for the last 18 months), I am really struggling with setting boundaries with her. On the advice on my sponsor, last night I went to my first Al-Anon meeting specifically for parents. I've been in Al-Anon for over 3 years, bu...	Green Eyes	3	357	Aug 17, 2012 by Path to Serenity
	In all our affairs... (Preview) While things have improved dramatically at home, I am currently struggling with a very unsatisfying work life at the moment. I came to the realization years ago that my career is not really something that I enjoy and not something that I was put on this earth to do. But, I'm 20 years in and as much as I disl...	usedtobeanyer	4	659	Aug 17, 2012 by AllieinAlanon
	(Newbie to site)How supportive should I be when he quits again? (Preview) My husband over the last year has quit drining, but never said forever or surrendered.....months of no drinking, then drinks and ends up being ugly for our marriage. This time he has told me he knows he can never drink again. I know the importance of support during recovery, but I am reluctant. Why s...	jennfire	7	453	Aug 17, 2012 by AllieinAlanon
	Feeling very done, is there hope for restoration? (Preview) Hi everyone! Yesterday I met with my therapist and she confronted me about how I don't cry about what's going on in my marriage. She asked me why I don't cry and I pretty much told her that crying doesn't get me anywhere except left with a HUGE headache, achy eyes, and a sore nose. Also, it never goes well...	ilovedogs	20	658	Aug 17, 2012 by pinkchip
	been there, done that... (Preview) Hi! I was here several years ago when I was married to an A who was also a cocaine addict. Looong story short... I left him and divorced him and have completely moved forward in my life. I met someone new and have a fantastic relationship with him and we're planning to get married sometime next year. My...	artygirl	4	363	Aug 17, 2012 by orchidlover
	Am I abandoning him? (Preview) So, things have been really terrible for the last 3 months. My AH's brother committed suicide in May. This is a horrible tradgedy and on top of it, he and my husband didn't have a great relationship. My AH is racked with guilt because he thinks he could have done somthing to prevent it. He is in a deep...	almostgivenup	12	690	Aug 17, 2012 by almostgivenup
	My mother is gone (Preview) This is my first time on this board and I will be attending my first Al-Anon meeting next week. The roller coaster of the last 5 years has reached new heights when it comes to my parents, especially my mother. Both my parents are alcoholics, but my dad stopped drinking 12 years ago and has been sober and c...	CassieCKA	4	409	Aug 17, 2012 by orchidlover
	Chairperson's Monday Night Al-Anon Meeting Schedule Change (Preview) Hello Everyone! It's that time of year for me where everything gets twisted, changed and re-scheduled for me. I am the Regular Chairperson for our Monday Night Al-Anon Meeting in our Chat Room and due to all these changes, I am jumping back to Chairing Tuesday Night Meetings starting next Monday (A...	lacewing	2	280	Aug 17, 2012 by Tigger
	Alanon is working! (Preview) I have been attending Alanon for over a year and am getting ready to start the steps with my sponsor next month. I wanted to say that this program works! I can't even explain it but it does. I read my literature every morning and evening. And the thing that has made a huge difference is I have been doing...	willowtree	4	464	Aug 16, 2012 by Country Boy
	Newly remarried and in dire need of advice. (Preview) I've never been to one of these forums but I'm desperate for some sage advice. I've only been married for a little over a year and I've already started to become angry and depressed; I fear for the future of my marriage because it's not going to survive if I continue to feel this kind of resentment, anger a...	Karma73	26	745	Aug 16, 2012 by Karma73
	How to start? (Preview) I don't know where to start. I think my husband is on his way to becoming a fulfledged alcoholic. Right now he is functioning, can go a week or so without drinking with no problems, but feels its necessary to have a drink nearly every night. He hides the empty beer cans, whisky bottles, wine bottles, e...	Lonely	10	587	Aug 16, 2012 by Faith_Love_2005
	May have had somewhat of a breakthrough? (Preview) I'm not gonna get my hopes up, I know these things take time, and usually it's a painful recovery. My alcoholic recently told me his cousin is in the hospital with severe alcohol poisoning and will most likely need to undergo surgery on his pancreas. I think it's made things very real, and has scared him...	fallingdown	1	279	Aug 16, 2012 by pineapple
	Lets examine LOVE! (Preview) What is the definition of Love?? You hear it all the time, but I love Him/Her. We are one. Marriage is forever!Love heals all. All you need is Love.... as we already know, there are different loves, love of our children, our parents, siblings. You can be constantly looking for love. With the goal of it b...	Bettina	5	597	Aug 16, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Alanon around the world (Preview) As seen below it seems Alanon helps the whole world. I didn't think I would be able to help my dil in Japan to understand the craziness of Aism but I told her to Google Alanon and she found it. I am so grateful for that because she is trying to control the situation Funny thing...since Japanese language doe...	Gailey	2	322	Aug 16, 2012 by Tigger
	Why is it all my fault, no matter what I do? And sometimes he's real fun to be with. Not sure what to do. (Preview) I'm new to this board. History... I wasn't raised in an alcoholic family. I dated my husband for 4 years before we married. Due to his work schedule we only saw each other 2-3 times a week and we didn't live together. I know this sounds crazy, but while there must have been some red flags during those 4 y...	Kate123	5	531	Aug 16, 2012 by jennfire
	Sponsorship (Preview) How do I choose a sponsor on-line?	suebama	2	320	Aug 15, 2012 by glad lee
	Still confused (Preview) How can I get quick relief? I hurt too much to stand. I'm bitter and hostile. I want my qualifier to suffer, he had a colonoscopy the other day and I hoped they'd perforate his bowel. Instead I just sent him a text asking him if the doctors had finally located his brain. I'm just so angry at him and even...	suebama	9	584	Aug 15, 2012 by ilovedogs
	Just trying to understand alcoholism (Preview) I'm in a new relationship- 6 months together. He has recently moved in- we felt it was right- I am starting to see his drinking habits and how self destructive he can be. Last night, he was out for 7 hrs, took money from me without asking and did not answer his texts- i'm sure he was with somebody else. I'm...	Sad-confused-gf	10	715	Aug 15, 2012 by Sad-confused-gf
	Jerry s duckies (Preview) hi Jerry, a day or so after you posted about your new little friends I went away to do some step work with some recovery friends, we stayed in a prayer house it was beautiful. I went out into the garden and there was a little pond with a duck and her 9 little duckings. A nun was feeding the ducks I laughed an...	Tracy	2	384	Aug 15, 2012 by Amandakay
	Anger Vent (Preview) Vacation with my mom was great the kids and I had an amazing time and I am so grateful that I was able to do that with them. My mom and I had a great time together lots of laughs and enjoyment. I actually miss her and was pretty emotional when we left. We are back and back to reality. It has not been an easy tr...	Pushka	8	652	Aug 15, 2012 by amills4294
	To much growth in al-anon it seems ! haha (Preview) Hey Everyone, My name is Jim and I have been a member of Al-Anon for 2.5 years. I cant express how much I am grateful for the fact that my higher power has guided me to this program. I am a 28 year old male. Prior to Al-Anon, I was very angry, sarcastic, bitter, judgemental and gossipy. Everything was always...	slogan_jim	1	439	Aug 15, 2012 by Katy
	Need Some Help! (Preview) I'm new to Al-Anon. I haven't been able to make a face to face meeting as I have 2 young children & no childcare for them, so I've came here in hopes that I can get some clarity and support. I've been married to my husband for 15 years. He has always drank, but never realized he was an alcoholic until a...	lashley6	4	582	Aug 15, 2012 by Jerry F
	SHedding my stinkin thinkin! (Preview) The more time i spend in al anon, the more awesome stuff i learn, and I wanted to share this thing i got goin on with ya'll today. I've realized that my thinking is really distorted because i have an initial reaction to be negative about most anything. as soon as i wake up its " oh I'm not doing anythin...	jorjorjor	4	348	Aug 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	lesson learned (Preview) I have been a member of Ala -non for only a short time since 2011. Yet I am a grateful member of Ala-non. When I first came here I was A bitter angry person as many of us are because of alcohol or the drug use of people we love. I have taken this program and applied as best I could to my life. For the past 8 months I h...	sirchef	4	398	Aug 15, 2012 by wp
	When does the pain end and the healing begin (Preview) For those that have moved on from their marriages due to this disease, When does the pain stop!! When do u feel happy again and let go of their sick thinking and your own? I was so strong when I left and after trying to reconcile with him choosing the drink I am a mess. I can't believe I went back and had him cho...	JJ21	10	583	Aug 15, 2012 by All I can be
	not knowing how to handle this sit. (Preview) ive been obsessing over and over on how i can tell my a/boyfriend that he needs to get him an apartment of his own thatr i really truely need my space back ,sounds horrible dont it,after allowing him back in my door after all the fuss of getting him out of my life the last times.but im starting to stress over...	silent	3	439	Aug 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	Could someone please help me. I'm confued. (Preview) I'm recently divorced which is something I'd wanted for a long, long time. It started out as a "friendly" break, but he has reunited with his old girlfriend from high school and they are deeply in love. I don't understand why I am so jealous nor what to do about it. I almost feel like stalk...	suebama	8	592	Aug 14, 2012 by suebama
	Today I am grateful (Preview) I am grateful that we have medical and dental insurance (no cavities for my son today!!! Yay!) I am grateful that my house is a mess today because I spent the time talking to my teenage son (gasp! He talks?) and playing with my daughter on the Wii. I am grateful that my work is so understanding and allo...	dragonflys	4	270	Aug 14, 2012 by Jennifer
	God (or HP) Works In Mysterious Ways (Preview) Was just thinking how I was led to this board back in February and how it was without a doubt an answer to a prayer. Around that same time, I realized that I needed to go back to work because my AH was falling behind in the bills. A friend of mine had told me about a job with an attorney a couple of months before...	WornOutMrsFixIt	4	380	Aug 14, 2012 by pineapple
	Blocked Facebook... (Preview) I blocked my STBXAH from facebook after "the event that changed everything"... and I am finding myself wondering if he has said anything on facebook. I want to unblock him just so I can stalk his facebook page - but I know that I'd have to wait 24 or 48 hours before I could block him again... I al...	Amandakay	4	541	Aug 14, 2012 by Amandakay
	Is there such a thing as a Happy Alcoholic? (Preview) We always hear them described as being racked with guilt and shame and I wonder if this is really true with all. My Ex A is a happy go lucky drunk at the bar and until something does not go his way and then he becomes a mad man. He has managed four DUI, jail time and spent several years in prison back in his tw...	JJ21	8	611	Aug 14, 2012 by GailMichelle
	I am not sure what to do... (Preview) A partner finally left 5 days ago. He rented a small mobile home in a sweet little park that is just right for him. Yesterday, I stopped by just to make sure he is all right...(mistake, I know) But when he drinks, he drinks enormous amounts of everything, so I am concerned he may die one day from overdos...	Diva	10	586	Aug 14, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Scared for myself and kids (Preview) Hello, I'm not sure exactely what I am looking for, but, I am here, and I do feel a need to tell my story. So hear it is, for anyone who wants to listen. My husband is a binge drinker. He doesn't drink every day, but it sure does seem like it more often than not lately. When he does drink, he cannot stop himsel...	lostbliss83	4	575	Aug 14, 2012 by dragonflys
	Food for thought (Preview) So my A has stayed relatively sober for the past year... 2 slips that I know of. He did it without AA (he wants no part of their beliefs). He is currently attending MANDATORY AA meetings 1x per week towards getting his license back, as well as the 1x per week 3 hour session with counselor (also mandat...	ELEKTRAWMN	4	346	Aug 14, 2012 by Pushka
	My first Al-Anon Convention...... (Preview) Hi, A couple of days ago I attended my first Al-Anon convention, I've been to an AA one before but I didn't get much from it. But on Sunday a small group of us drove the several hours to this convention. It was so uplifting and something one of the speakers shared really resonated with me. I just wanted t...	UK Jane	2	298	Aug 14, 2012 by hotrod
	One week later (Preview) I've been gone from home for a week. My relapsing AH has made many calls asking me to come over, come home, and call him back. I haven't answered his calls or returned his messages. In those messages his moods seem to be all over the place. I had made the decision that I wasn't going to talk to him because h...	WornOutMrsFixIt	11	539	Aug 14, 2012 by WornOutMrsFixIt
	Thrown a curveball... (Preview) Things have been going very well with my wife's recovery. She's been sober, as far as I know, since Easter, and beyond being just sober she seems very together and well adjusted. She's made some very close friends in her program and that seems to have made a tremendous difference for her. I won't lie tha...	usedtobeanyer	7	587	Aug 14, 2012 by Jerry F
	Is it worth bringing up? (Preview) We are going threw a financial rough patch at the moment. We have not bought food in over a month. I eat breakfast every morning thanks to wonderful back yard chickens. We have killed a few and put them in the freezer too. But i have gone 2 weeks without eating lunch at work and being sick everyday because o...	HoofnIt	8	469	Aug 13, 2012 by hotrod
	feeling a little sad for myselfhaI (Preview) My A "Friend" is pulling away from me.. and I know it is for his own good..he is trying to stay on track with his sobrieety and since it has only been 6 months he is avoiding a relationshipbecause he has to be selfish right now to stay clean. I am so proud of him for knowing that whay he needs to do to...	flyagain	2	473	Aug 13, 2012 by flyagain
	What would you give up for Happiness??? (Preview) Ok Peeps... I Friend of Mine Past this on to me, and Really Gave me alot to Think about... So Thought I would Share...(Hope thats OK..... Not Sure about you all but it Definately sounds like it Fits Here! So I have Decided to Place it above my Desk so I Can Work on it! That Last one was a BIGGIE.... I Strugg...	Jozie	6	611	Aug 13, 2012 by Jennifer
	Rescuing my ACOA sister (Preview) I feel like crying right now. I was in a great mood but I have been affected by my sister's untreated disease. I have an unrecovered ACOA sister who has been stuck in depression for several years. She phones me often for help and I do my best to give her my ESH, but often she seems to just want to stay in the dar...	Tigger	4	548	Aug 13, 2012 by BlueCloud
	Fear - Vent (Preview) My phone is having a bad 24 hours. I tried to make it better by calling a list of people but nobody is answering. And the texts keep rolling in, at first just jibberish to me like comments about blue skies and pain that developed into wanting to have breakfast and what I feel is threatening, I am on my way, I...	Jennifer	5	520	Aug 13, 2012 by Pushka
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.