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What to do now?
(Preview)
Long story short got into a relationship with a woman this year who had not only major addiction issues but many other mental health issues. It has been truly toxic and after a year of enabling her behavior in many ways (buying alcohol, being her personal taxi when she called, paying for moving costs, e...
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NewRomantics
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2
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1112
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Critically ill loved one
(Preview)
My mother and father are my qualifiers. My mother is gravely ill. She's not drinking now because she's in a semi coma and bed bound. Her drinking had gotten pretty bad. She would drink from 5pm until 2 or 3am. At the beginning of September she went to the ER because she had the flu and wasn't getting bett...
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StargazerLily
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3
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1041
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I haven’t told my story
(Preview)
I dated an alcoholic on and off for three years. Three months in he told me he was an alcoholic, I went into denial. My father was an alcoholic, I had aca recovery yet still I struggled to break free. He broke up with me suddenly, I was confused , a week later he wanted to try again. So we did. And so the dance be...
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Loudnlost
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1
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978
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new and cautious
(Preview)
Hello, I did not grow up with an alcoholic. My husband of one year is an alcoholic and its taken me some time to fully understand and accept this. I have known for some time that my words, my emotions, my stress and pain due to his drinking - although real and valid - are not helping him and are making me feel...
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tryingtounderstand
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2
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1106
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Holiday wishes
(Preview)
In case anyone is checking in, wishing everyone a happy Thanksgiving tomorrow. Lyne :)
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Lyne
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1
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1052
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Gratitude, etc.
(Preview)
Greetings, all. I haven't been here for a bit. I got distracted. I was at a virtual meeting last night in Hawaii, another 12 step fellowship, and they had asked me to close the meeting with a reading and with a prayer of my choice. I did the AA third step prayer. This morning, I remembered that I hadn't been...
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Wolfie55
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5
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1137
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One Day At A Time
(Preview)
Somewhere at this site, is a story posted Feb 25, 2012. That was a few days ago. Anyway, it's the story of how Nancy (my wife) and I got together. It was printed in the AA Grapevine in May of 2010 and was also included in a grapevine book entitled Forming True Partnerships. So, we all know about the pandemic...
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Wolfie55
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1
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1116
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10-31-23 C2C The Only Thing to Fear Is: Fear Itself…Closing Time…
(Preview)
On the topic of fear, today's author admits that was the primary emotion driving many decisions. When anything happened to alter an expected outcome, fears of the worst possible outcomes spurred panic, resulting in a crazy flurry of actions intended to ward off various imagined disasters. The aut...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1178
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Monday, 10/30, C2C, Grateful member of alanon
(Preview)
The writer used to hear people say they were grateful to be involved with an alcoholic, because they were grateful to have found alanon. You can learn many things in alanon, like gratitude and forgiveness are needed for peace of mind. A tiny step can be a great step in seeing life with increasing joy....
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Lyne
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1
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1133
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Outreach to the membership
(Preview)
Good evening to all. I have been in contact recently with two members of MIP. It has been shared that MIP will be disappearing sometime in the near future due to financial issues. I don't know whether this will be tomorrow or the end of the year. As you can see, most of the people doing the daily shares...
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Lyne
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2
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1250
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10/24/23 C2C Onion, or Birch Bark...Is There a Difference?
(Preview)
Today's reading likens recovery in AlAnon to a Birch tree, rather than an onion, because it sheds its bark on its own after a period of growth: the bark serves a valuable purpose but then fall away as the tree grows and new protective bark takes its place. If a protective layer of bark is removed too earl...
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Enigmatic
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2
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1222
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10/10/23 C2C Can’t Steer the Car by the Armrest
(Preview)
This writer recalled white knuckling the car armrest while riding a twisty, hilly road as a youngster. Such effort had no effect on the course the car took, much as many efforts and exertions in adult life upon events outside our control. Alanon can help, however, especially noticeable when we can't...
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Enigmatic
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2
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1211
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Monday, 10/23, C2C, when the alcoholic gets sober
(Preview)
The writer thought the nightmare was over when the alcoholic got sober, but what a surprise! Many problems were still present, and old behaviors were occurring. With alanon's teachings, the writer knew that there was no need to accept what is unacceptable, nor does one have to argue back. There a...
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Lyne
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0
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1183
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MIP - Call for Feedback, Input or Great Recipes
(Preview)
Greetings fellow MIPers, visitors, and casual wanderers  As Lyne noted below, and others have mentioned and discussed over the past few weeks and months, there is some uncertainty about the future of MIP. That quite possibly has led to a migration of readers and contributors before the actual e...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1255
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10/17/23 ODAT Prayer and Meditation – Wait Until Step 11?
(Preview)
Today's writer acknowledges the value of the spiritual learning that builds when one studies the 12 Steps one at a time, in order. Special consideration is given to Step 11, however, regarding prayer and meditation. That is an activity that can be worked at any time and brings great benefits at any t...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1237
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Monday, 10/16, C2C, when surrounded by crisis....
(Preview)
This reading says we may be powerless over circumstances, but we are not helpless. In the midst of problems or stress, we are reminded to nurture our mind, body, or spirit. Alanon is a program of action, and we always have choices. If we treat ourselves with love and tenderness, we can better cope wi...
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Lyne
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0
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1169
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Monday, October 9, C2C, submission vs surrender
(Preview)
The writer had trouble admitting being powerless, and did not want to "surrender." The writer saw this as admitting defeat, and having failed over alcoholism. Gratitude finally sunk in--it did not mean submission! Instead, it meant not fighting reality, not trying to do God's will, and doing on...
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Lyne
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1
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1116
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October 5 Courage to Change - Changed Attitudes
(Preview)
Today's reading suggests dispelling negativity by focusing attention on gratitude for what you have. Some tools for changing a negative attitude to a positive on suggested in this reading are attending an Al-Anon meeting or contacting another Al-Anon member to share. Such interchanges can resu...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1263
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ODAT in alanon, Monday, 10/2, forging ahead
(Preview)
This reading is about an alanon member who was not happy with her meeting and left. She had learned that everybody in the meeting, and everyone in the fellowship, is equal. However one member tended to manage everyone and everything. This member became uncomfortable and decided to try a new group...
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Lyne
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1
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1083
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10/3/23 C2C Compassion – Defined By What it is Not
(Preview)
Struggling to define compassion, today's writer knew it was not the ugly behavior that had been showing their loved one at times: yelling, name calling, revenge seeking, throwing things.Compassion does not mean accepting abusive behavior from the alcoholic, but it certainly does not mean handi...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1185
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Courage to Change September 28 - Letting Go
(Preview)
Today's reading uses the example of decision making at an Al-anon business meeting to demonstrate the process of letting go. During the business meeting, the Al-anon member suggests using the entire Serenity Prayer in the group's Al-anon meetings. Another member contributed their a suggestion...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1279
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9/26/23 C2C – Not Bad, Just Feelings
(Preview)
Today's page is a powerful lesson on perspective as the writer finds value in feelings they once saw as defects: anger, resentment, jealousy, and fear. With applied effort, these feelings were used to make positive changes in their life. Reminder - feelings may be uncomfortable at times, but tha...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1086
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Monday, 9/25, ODAT in alanon, personal freedom
(Preview)
It may be hard to imagine we can ever experience personal freedom. We may be enmeshed in a troubled family situation, and are also intertwined with others. However, alanon helps us develop our own personalities, which reinforces personal freedom by leaving others alone to control their lives....
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Lyne
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1
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1173
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September 21 Courage to Change - Fear
(Preview)
Today's reading discusses how living with the disease of alcoholism led the person to become a fearful person dreading change. They preferred familiar chaos rather than change because they felt some control over what was familiar. The reading states that this sense of control is an illusion and th...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1168
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9/19/23 ODAT - Alcoholism Doesn’t Remove All Marital Responsibilities
(Preview)
Today's writer reminds that alcoholism is but one of the possible challenges of maintaining a marriage. The presence of alcoholism, therefore, should not be used as an excuse to give up on our efforts to control and improve on our own faults and shortcomings in the relationship. "...in sickness an...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1181
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Monday, 9/18, C2C, our memory enables us to see progress
(Preview)
When we are troubled about what lies ahead, we can look back to see where we've been. When we grow frustrated about the changes we want, we can see that we are dealing with things because we have gained awareness. Time offers evidence that alanon works--we can see the growth in our life. This gives us...
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Lyne
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1
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1201
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September 14 Courage to Change - Disappointment
(Preview)
Today's reading reminds us of the feelings of disappointment that can accompany living with alcoholism. The person in the reading expresses that their excitement and hopes were often dashed by their expectations of their alcoholic. Eventually, their feelings were numbed, feelings of hopeless...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1204
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9/12/23 ODAT – Resist Advising Others to Action
(Preview)
Today's page focuses our responsibility to help others by narrowing it to spiritual advice and guidance, not suggesting specific action. In plain terms: it is not our right. Regardless of our intention, inserting our thoughts on what another should do may unleash unintended repercussions or pe...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1167
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Monday, 9/11, C2C, feeling inadequate
(Preview)
This reading focuses on feeling inadequate when doing the 4th Step. The writer felt inadequate about their entire life, that they were doing it wrong, and that their best was never good enough. However Step 4 can put self-doubt in perspective, and give us a chance to find some balance. It's OK to qu...
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Lyne
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1
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1281
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Courage to Change September 7 Alanon topic - Service
(Preview)
Today's reading refers to Tradition 7 as it applies to being of service in Al-anon groups. Al-anon is self supporting and contributing financial support to Al-anon is important but in order for Al-anon and Al-anon groups to continue to thrive, members must commit to participate in service to thei...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1226
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9/5/23 C2C - You Can't Always Get What You Want
(Preview)
Today's writer asked their Higher POwer to remove unwanted feelings during work on the 7th Step 'Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings,'. That didn't happen, as feelings aren't shortcomings! Alanon principles helped them learn to acknowledge, accept and let them go when needed. "I have ver...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1221
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Monday, 9/4, C2C, learning to trust the peace
(Preview)
This reading says many of us have gotten used to obsession, worry, crisis, and focusing on everyone else. It's taken an adjustment period to let go of the frequent mental chatter and find stillness and serenity instead. Sometimes we might latch onto old fears because we didn't know how to feel saf...
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Lyne
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1
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1156
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Al-Anon Members What Are You Grateful For?
(Preview)
Hope everyone is having a great weekend and beautiful Sunday. I noticed it's been awhile since we've done a gratitude list here at MIP. I know that some of you make daily gratitude lists. It's not something I do regularly but I always feel more hopeful after considering things for which I'm grateful an...
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tiredtonite
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4
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850
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8/29/23 ODAT - Great Expectations
(Preview)
Great page that reminds us the source of many frustration and discontentment: expectations that we are not prepared to accept with serenity if the results fall short. Reminder: I can learn to find appreciation with less than I think should be possible. Contentment comes from appreciation of the...
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Enigmatic
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1
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991
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C2C, Monday, 8/28, gifts from a sponsor
(Preview)
The reading for today speaks of some of the benefits from working with a sponsor. It allows you to practice trusting someone again. It can teach you that you are worth saving. It can lift your spirits and help you have a positive outlook. You can be gently guided through the Steps which is an amazing...
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Lyne
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0
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791
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Courage to Change August 24 Anger
(Preview)
Today's Courage to Change reading is about the topic of Anger. It uses a story of someone who describes themself as a gentle and easy going person but flies into a rage at their innocent pet dog who gets tangled in a cord in the home. The person's temper flares and they yell angry words at their pet. The dog...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1140
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8/22/23 ODAT – Get Rid of the Splinter
(Preview)
Today's page asks us to consider handling hatred or resentment as we would a thorn or splinter: quickly, without hesitation. We wouldn't intentionally let a thorn fester into infection, nor should we let resentment. The key with both is to take immediate action, don't wait. Reminder If I don't wan...
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Enigmatic
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1
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994
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Hope for Today Aug 20
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how steps one, two and three are the beginning of meaningful change. The writer describes how the effects of being raised in an alcoholic family were completely embedded in him/her. The two traits that were especially difficult were turning to those w...
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yanksfan51
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1
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1267
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C2C, Monday, August 21, Searching for the real me
(Preview)
Today's reading focuses on unexpected benefits from alanon: living according to my needs, loving myself as a new found friend, learning about detachment, and understanding that many of my problems come from minding everyone else's business. Learning to take responsibility for my own life, an...
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Lyne
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0
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1196
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Please Consider Sharing
(Preview)
If you are new to Al-Anon, welcome! We look forward to getting to know you. To those who have been around awhile, your experience, strength and hope is appreciated. There is recovery benefit from mutual sharing - reading varying perspectives on an Al-Anon topics. Grateful for MIP, our online recove...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1264
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One Day at a Time August 17 - Tradition 12
(Preview)
Tradition 12 - Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all of our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles above personalities. Today's reading focuses on a newcomer's concerns about attending Al-Anon. Wishing to stay anonymous, they worry that others in the meeting may tell those in t...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1173
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8/15/23 C2C How Important is It? Rerouting…
(Preview)
Coming from the fog of constant perceived crisis, today's page helps us apply proportion to events that depart from our expectation. Inconvenience, or major crisis?Alanon suggests the question 'how important is it' is helpful to decide if I am exaggerating or anticipating future fears, rather t...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1190
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Hope for Today Aug 13
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: First I want to express gratitude for this space. When I came to this site a little over 10 years ago, I was lost. I mean LOST. What I found here was patience, grace, understanding, compassion and help. Its been a privilege to be part of the service through writings over these seve...
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yanksfan51
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3
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1220
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ODAT in Alanon, Monday, 8/14, who needs help?
(Preview)
This reading reflects upon when the alcoholic finally reaches a bottom, and begins the long climb upward with AA. This begins growth for the alcoholic both in personal and spiritual maturity. The writer comments that naturally both partners in an alcoholic marriage, need a growth program. As n...
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Lyne
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1
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1176
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Courage to Change August 10 Topic: Isolation
(Preview)
Today's reading uses the idea of housekeeping to inventory Al-Anon recovery. The reading mentions that one member through an Al-Anon personal inventory was able to tie their penchant for keeping a very tidy home to the illusion of being in control of an otherwise unmanageable life. Another Al-An...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1281
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8/8/23 ODAT - Advice we ‘Must Not’ Give
(Preview)
Great guidance in today's page reminding Alanoners of the type of advice we should give: spiritual advice pointing back to program concepts and slogans. Great care should be shown not to suggest others take 'drastic' action in areas of relationships or other serious life matters, even saying "we d...
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Enigmatic
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1
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1235
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Monday, 8/7, Hope for Today, my rights as a person
(Preview)
This author speaks about how damaging growing up with alcoholism was, and how alanon has turned things around. They learned many important things about the rights they are entitled to: -the right to speak at a meeting without interruption or advice -that anonymity would be respected -that "no" is...
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Lyne
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0
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1192
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Hope for Today Aug 6
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a look at why we sometimes resist certain situations, avoiding for a specific reason. The writer describes being asked to sponsor for an alateen meeting. The writer resisted, feeling like he/she did not even particularly like teenagers! Once the meetin...
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yanksfan51
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1
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1183
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One Day at a Time Thursday, August 3, 2023
(Preview)
Topic: Changing what I can The writer finds that their preoccupation with what others do, where and why create turmoil inside them. Such thoughts lead them to consider "a new, honest self-appraisal." The reading goes on to state that the writer's first obligation is to "work out changes in my own t...
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tiredtonite
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1
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1241
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Friday's Readings
(Preview)
I am sorry to say that I will not be doing Friday readings anymore. If anyone would like to step up and take that day it would be lovely. I find that I am stretched thin and really put much effort into that post and can no longer do it anymore.
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DM2021
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2
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1192
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There are some lovely Al-Anon Groups on Reddit Already
(Preview)
https://www.reddit.com/r/AlAnon/ https://www.reddit.com/r/AlanonFamilyGroups/ Please check them out if you are so inclined. I do not see any reason to actually start a new group, but PM each other our e-mails to keep in touch if you would like. What are your thoughts?
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DM2021
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1
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1217
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Last know post from Administrator of MIP on ACOA Board
(Preview)
Not sure how we're still running.Permalink Reply Quote One year later, the GoDaddy fee for this website again came out of my credit card. I am determined this will not happen again in 2024, but it will take some maneuvering, as it won't let me take my credit card out without putting a different one i...
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DM2021
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0
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1300
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8/1/23 C2C They Are Not the Problem…
(Preview)
Today's writer arrived at Alanon as did many: hoping to find out how to get the alcoholic to stop drinking, thinking that was the problem. They learned, as many others have also: they didn't cause alcoholism, can't control it or cure it.They kept coming back, however, because they discovered there w...
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Enigmatic
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2
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1223
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Wanted to know if everyone would like a Plan B for MIP
(Preview)
Messages Iamhere and asked what her thoughts were on the issue of the possibility that we may find MIP is no longer accessible and if a Plan B would be prudent and she didn't think it was a bad idea. If you all think that maybe having a Facebook page to keep in contact with each other, to have for daily readi...
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DM2021
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10
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672
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Hope for Today, Monday, 7/31, wisdom vs insanity
(Preview)
The author is saying that correct use of the mind leads to wisdom, and incorrect use of the mind leads to insanity. This program encourages right use of the mind and heart. We have a spiritual direction, and learn that our recovery is up to us. Our mind can either hurt us or help us--we have a choice. L...
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Lyne
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1
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642
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I enabled her and feel terrible about it
(Preview)
I came to this board to initially post about my relationship with my girlfriend who has a drinking problem. We now live separately but we are still together. It hasn't been easy and it has been a very rocky road but I love her too much to just give up on her. And she has shown me she is trying to fight the addic...
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NewRomantics
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7
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1011
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July 30 Hope for Today
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a look at what it means to give up the illusion of control. The writer describes that the process started with understanding that there were many people who had been put on pedestals, taking the place of a higher power in his/her life. The writer began to see tha...
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yanksfan51
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1
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479
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Stargazers are blooming!!
(Preview)
Always look forward to when they bloom.
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DM2021
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2
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878
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C2C for Friday, July 28, 2023 – Faith and Perseverance
(Preview)
This day's reading is talking about faith and hard work, i.e.: Sticking with the program and how after time (each person has a different time table)we begin to get the sense that the serenity and understanding we have been seeking is at hand. We each have a different method, ability andenvironment w...
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DM2021
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2
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930
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ODAAT 7/27 Al-Anon: As a Way of Life
(Preview)
Today's reading speaks about our relationships with the alcoholics in our life. It focuses on possible expectations that sobriety will eradicate all of our problems. The reading uses the marriage relationship and further explains that this is a fallacy. The reading states that despite alcoho...
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tiredtonite
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2
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970
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