Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Clou · Clou

Today is my 32nd wedding anniversary. My AH and I are separated since January and I have filed for divorce. The last 10 years have been a series of rehabs, periods of sobriety, and relapses. I finally woke up one day and realized that if I did not take the step to leave my husband, I could end up in ano...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. In my spare time I play rec co-ed Ball Hockey and tonight we saw a prime example of a bully doing his thing. I wear glasses and can't wear contact lenses because I have a scar in my eye that doesn't allow it. During the game tonight...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi all At the beginning of the week I talked about the movie " Life of Pi " and how I couldn't stop crying and really didn't know why. Now I have learned more about me. I'm still lost and crying once in a while but I think I know what is causing it. For 3 long years I have been caught up in my son's a...

Gaby · Gaby

Today I met some one that opened up to me in just minutes and told me he is an active A and he left his program because he feels he can do this on his own.. I looked at him and said if you know you can then why so many relapses. He cried.. My heart went out to him. I couldn't say anything because at that moment I thou...

PattyS · PattyS

I am so mad right now and I am finding myself berating via text message my 21 year old son in recovery so I decided I needed to go to another place to vent my anger and get some feedback on the situation. My 21 year old is almost 16 months in recovery. We are so proud of the accomplishments he has made. Howev...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everyone: It's been a few weeks since my AH has been staying in his apt; this past weekend our kids spent the night there so they could be there on Father's Day morning, and that seemed to go pretty well. The kids were excited to stay somewhere new (I think it felt sort of like a hotel adventure to them),...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

I posted recently about going away for work, and being worried if AH would drink during my absence. So, the trip went well for me, but not surprisingly, he did what As do, and is back drinking. So today I tried to communicate my boundaries to him. I told him I needed to know if he was taking this recovery ser...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

Gods grace when we seek it always brings Truth. when I'm judging another person's defects, there are ALWAYS 2 things I don't understand. first, there is always one more fact about that person's life that if I knew it I would have nothing but compassion for them. This goes for my own sick father. God has c...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

I try my best to only bear "good news" to people. I like to keep a positive upbeat attitude despite it all. Recently I had wrote about one of my best friends from high school which I lost touch with. We are both creative people and upon or reuniting we decided we wanted to create an independent f...

sadsusie · sadsusie

So, I had a busy day. I went to my first church service (a healing service) and had my first communion in over a decade. I went to my very first counseling session. I packed my suitcase and "left" my husband. And then headed to my first alanon meeting. I have been living in crazytown for so lon...

Path to Serenity · Path to Serenity

There was a ''domestic situation'' at daughter's house a couple days ago - new drunken BF went balistic, loaded a shotgun while ranting & raving. Daughter calls me, I tell her to lock herself in bathroom and call 911 -- she's drunk too!! She didn't want to call 911 so I did - was on two phones at onc...

linnylou · linnylou

Hi, I am having a hard time having a relationship with my older sister. I've managed for the past few years by living thousands of miles away, but currently we're both living in our hometown and helping my father at his office. She has been sober for a few months and I find myself becoming increasingly r...

nelson619 · nelson619

I'm fairly new to this but long story short, my girlfriend is an alchoholic. She goes on crazy benders (a lot more infrequently than she used to thank god) but nonetheless it happens. My question is what is the best way to deal with the hangover? When she finally comes out of it and is feeling like microwa...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I am so impressed with all the great slogans that I hear people use here on the board and in chat. Is there a link to a place where they are all listed (hopefully with explanations of what each means and how I can use it). I cannot tell everyone how much just repeating the 3 Cs (I didn't cause it, I can't cure i...

Minaret · Minaret

Hi, I haven't been on here in a while. Last time I posted, I was going through the slow agony of grieving the loss of my marriage...at the time, we were still living under the same roof. AH was still drinking. He had been having an affair and I knew it, I was just in denial, sorting through my fee...

Jerry F · Jerry F

God will do for me what I cannot and often time will not do for myself. Dinner last evening was an expectation. Not a biggie...promises were made along with plans and though I wasn't looking forward to something I would have no control over unless it was me alone it turned out to be another exclamati...

Jerry F · Jerry F

And my eldest son will be in attendance along with my program and without unnecessary mention our Higher Power. His house is out of order...a shambles...looking like an old cabin long forgotten in the deep woods; abandoned. He has lived the metaphor of a life forgotten, undone, trashed and I wil...

sadsusie · sadsusie

My life (our life) has continued to be stressful. MY AH is continuing his path of personal destruction, and unfortunately I allowed myself to be consumed by the rubble. I have destroyed my laptop, my bedroom door, and my morale. I suppose all these years of feeling and being controlled makes me all the...

John · John

I said the Serenity Prayer a few times today and I'm okay. I was informed that I did not qualify for sliding scale medical assistance from a community clinic, to simply get a physical and some basic blood work done. I'm down to 121 lbs, from 142 just over a year ago. Do not have a clue as to why I'm losing t...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

So today I continued keeping the focus on me. When I woke up this morning, no kidding, but there was a tune vrunning through my head

laurab · laurab

I've been off the boards for 3 months since we came home from Thailand with my son. He had a 3 week beer binge, in Phuket. No food. He wound up in the ICU He was a mess. I went there and brought him home. We went right to the local ER where they scanned and MRIed his head and found he was ok. He looked and spoke like...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

Back in my Unsure mode. Ah sober 7 which I will stop referring to . ah . Has been out of my home for 30 days but not completely he would find a way to come back home for something . I had a long talk with him the other day positive ! I opened up and told him my inventory hmmmm was that a smart move on my half at the time...

nelson619 · nelson619

My girlfriend owns a bar and I am the head bartender at it too. Great job for an alchoholic I know! Sometimes she falls out with her business partner, goes on a bender and nearly closes the doors for good. We work predominantly all our shifts together and when a bender is finished and she is pissed off with...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I was asked to watch the movie " Life of Pi " and how I can relate to the Tiger. I watched it this morning and I'm having a hard time with it. Don't know why but I can't seem to quit crying....Why? Is it because I need to live with life on Life's terms, that I can't control and that I have to let go? I...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

It was hard, but today I kept the focus on me. He is doing what he does, but I am determined to find good in this day.

Harriet Zilber · Harriet Zilber

I have gone to several beginners meetings and found be wonderful wonderful, but regular meetings are troubling to me. Hearing the individual experiences and the pain that accompanies feels like a extension of my work day. Although I get a great deal from the teachings, it is not enough to overcome th...

Gaby · Gaby

I got a phone call from my son that is currently in rehab on Saturday and I was scared to talk to him because I felt I was going to have a complete break down after not been able to talk to him in 35 days. But he sounds great and after so long he also shared that he quit smoking. I believe in my heart he wants sobrie...

Bettina · Bettina

Suggestions when your not feeling your best: Open your life by finding ways to help others Expand the activities in your life. Be a positive influence wherever you go. Don't be a whiner. Don't dwell in the past. Look for solutions. Pray to expand your life force. Be convinced that everything is for...

el-cee · el-cee

I would like to share with you where I am right now. My son is still homeless, he has not sorted anything out in terms of housing because he has court, that has been ongoing since January, so he thinks it would be useless to get accomodation if there is a chance he will go to prison. I have not heard from him fo...

Jen61 · Jen61

I can see the affects almost immediately, I can smell it and taste it, but no I am not drinking. You must be mistaken. It is only water. Wow.

grateful2be · grateful2be

I went to work today. I went through the front door of the large historic building that I work in and parked my car on the side of the building close to the front steps. I do that because we have a circular drive in an inner-city neighborhood and it helps to cut down on folks using my drive to sell drugs. So...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

Going through the detachment process and really experiencing what it means is more complicated than I had anticipated. 1. My moods are just not the same for an elongated period of days or weeks. It is changing every day in terms of if I am happy and want to be around people, or sad. 2. And the types of actua...

Lyne · Lyne

My A went to pick up dinner 10 min from our house and was gone an hour and 15. And of course it's a place that has a bar and she has sat alone there drinking. The bad news is that I asked her if she was drinking and of course she denied it. The good news is that I stayed calm, there was no drama, and I don't believ...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Something that Pinkchip shared with me recently has recently stuck with me: the statement in the subject: crazy is as crazy does. I don't know how many of you do this but I find myself still analyzing all of my AH's actions. It's infuriating that I waste my mental energy trying to figure out the actions...

Pushka · Pushka

It has been a peaceful day today the first one since last Friday evening and I am VERY grateful at this point. It's pretty sad when I realized that OMGosh .. today is the first day I haven't seen a deputy, been to the court house, gotten any texts OR had to deal with my atty. That's pretty huge. Instead of...

Jerry F · Jerry F

You all know I'm a double. You all know that I started in Al-Anon before entering AA. I took my Al-Anon program into those rooms or else. I am long past wondering or worrying how another alcoholic reacts to my programing. I know that guilt and shame on my part works wonders for their parts and soooo...

hotrod · hotrod

'http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54066479/step-6-alanon/

Rose50 · Rose50

My son has relapsed (yet again) and had checked himself into the psych unit where he remained for 2 weeks. he was diagnosed with major depression and put on meds. Currently he's in inpatient facility for alcohol abuse where he's receiving counseling and attending AA meetings. He recently lost his j...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey Everyone, My father goes back to work on Monday after being on disability for depression/alcoholism. This time though he said he has a meeting with HR, his boss, his boss' boss and the rehab person from the insurance company that does his disability insurance. He sounded surprisingly upbeat abo...

PP · PP

To all of the men who are fathers in any capacity, here is a Happy Father's Day greeting to you....and thank you for your service.

Cherubhmm · Cherubhmm

I write on here rarely but I'm feeling upset tonight. My man has been doing brilliantly..or so I think. He has reduced his alcohol intake to 4 pints a night, a little more on weekends. Well he has had to. he has got into such debt after subsidising his drinking with payday loans that he is now in troubl...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

I recently posted on Attitude and how I perceived it so vague I couldn't even see the word clear. It was basically to me a negative feeling I was casting through the air. It Felt like a Major Defect, and who knows for me, maybe it is. I began to view it as what am I telling my mind. Am I constantly putting i...

AngieK · AngieK

I'm uncomfortable with this. My fella tried to get help, but they said they couldn't help because it wasn't daily. It's been a year, or so I think, but the results are no different- no keys, no wallet, a pocket full of receipts, at least this time no car which means someone dropped him off. Hours of worry,...

Bettina · Bettina

Everything passes. Both soaring joy and crushing sorrows fade away like a dream. However, the knowledge of having lived one's life to the fullest never disappears!

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

assuming others have also had this experience ? needing ' emotional ' support. This weekend we have family in town that are very successful financial and status wise. They own a firm and are beautiful people and yet I see through the busy of making things look good. On the surface, everything looks...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

My ah sober 7 months has been a little better to deal with. With him not here in the home I'm able to function and think on my own. My emotions still are up and down but I seem to catch it fast enought to control them.. The lack of al Alon meetings I have not been attending do to child care I still go up in my room an...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I have a dear friend who I don't get to see as often as I like. She and I met today, and she told me she learned a coping technique at her AlAnon meeting which I thought sounded like one I can try. (Disclaimer: I didn't attend the F2F meeting, so might not have the technique down pat) She said: when you are g...

John · John

Hello Everyone, I am scared. I doubt most will understand the depths of despair i am in and feeling. I have never been a big man. The most i have ever weighed was 142 lbs at 5"11'. I have worn a size 32 pant in the waist since my early 20's. Now, i am 54 and in the last 2 years i lost 24 lbs, 4 pant sizes for an a...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Why fear it now. Trust God...clean house...help others. My mind was trying to give me cause to fear and panic while I was working yesterday doing labor in my yard. I got to revisit an event which happened after and as a result of being in a head-on accident. When the EMTs came to take me out of the wreck...

Pushka · Pushka

Since I have been living at the court house recently it's been very entertaining to say the least. I love to people watch and then it's funny as you see the same people as far as law enforcement and people who work there, it's an interesting system. It's not always fair and it's not always just, .. at lea...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

So day by day it gets easier to recover from anything! Today it is my vision; tomorrow it will be something else but I am ready to face whatever comes my way! For all who don't know this has been quite of road of recovery for me. I have been in & out of this program for many years. I am just now learning how t...

rehprof · rehprof

so...today the exA stopped by to put up a heavy bag for my 16yo son. After the job was done he asked my son to go out in the driveway...I heard a pop-pop -- he was showing my son his that his silencer is now made to fit on his .22. There is always this subtle message of violence...and I hate it. He knows I hate gun...

Pushka · Pushka

Things are moving along at expedited speeds and that is a good thing. There is another pre-trial date in about 4 weeks which means I will meet with STBAX, his atty and mine in the next two weeks. At least I think so .. I am grateful that there is an end date and all of a sudden things got REALLY serious. T...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I am not sure what to do. My exah has supervised visitation which is also what our 12 yo daughter wants/is comfortable with. BUT he continues to break boundaries and I am not sure how far to push back. Last night he gt a new cell number & contacted her drunk & told her to keep it a secret from me. She s...

IrishMama6 · IrishMama6

This is my first post. I am scared. My Therapist said 'Go to an Al-Anon meeting. It will help." I'm afraid to go. I'm afraid AH and I will fight. He's a weekend binge drinker. He's done this his whole life. He was raised around it. When you're not working you drink. He doesn't do it during t...

Jozie · Jozie

In an Unbalanced World... How is it that in this Disease it seems the only time i Feel my Feet Safely planted on the ground is when i am surrounded by Chaos? I don't get it... When things pop Up and I Have No Time to 'Over Think it' It seems it rolls smoother, but when i take the time to Respond instead of React,...

newgirl17 · newgirl17

My husband has been sober for a few years he had been going to meetings faithfully. I just found out that he has been lying about going to meetings. He has been going to "meetings" and working steps with newcomers. I confronted my husband about it and asked him where he had been. At first he sai...

4st7lb · 4st7lb

I feel like the 12 step and AA which is touted as the only way to stop drugs and drinking when you are bad off is too heavily centered around the Christian Faith. for someone like me who doesn't believe in any religion whatsoever there is no difference between us and animals and no paranormal outsider is g...

Lyne · Lyne

I've tried to explain some issues to my A as clearly and detailed as possible, and without hostility. She doesn't get it, doesn't want to get it, got it and blocked it right out, or speaks some other language than myself. I honestly think I can communicate better with my 2 yr old granddaughter! A's ar...

ms1414 · ms1414

I will be married to my AH for 27 years next month. We have been together since the age of 13 and were married and had two boys by the age of 21. He became an alcoholic going on 6 years now, when his brother died of a sudden heart attack, who also was an alcoholic. We did the counseling three years ago, he gave t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Feeling sad today (Preview) Today is my 32nd wedding anniversary. My AH and I are separated since January and I have filed for divorce. The last 10 years have been a series of rehabs, periods of sobriety, and relapses. I finally woke up one day and realized that if I did not take the step to leave my husband, I could end up in ano...	Clou	10	525	Jun 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	Using my program. Serenity prayer was needed (Preview) Hi Everyone, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. In my spare time I play rec co-ed Ball Hockey and tonight we saw a prime example of a bully doing his thing. I wear glasses and can't wear contact lenses because I have a scar in my eye that doesn't allow it. During the game tonight...	slogan_jim	8	402	Jun 22, 2013 by Jerry F
	Lost and don't know what to do with my co-dependency (Preview) Hi all At the beginning of the week I talked about the movie " Life of Pi " and how I couldn't stop crying and really didn't know why. Now I have learned more about me. I'm still lost and crying once in a while but I think I know what is causing it. For 3 long years I have been caught up in my son's a...	Cathyinaz	21	827	Jun 22, 2013 by DavidG
	Fear ;( (Preview) Today I met some one that opened up to me in just minutes and told me he is an active A and he left his program because he feels he can do this on his own.. I looked at him and said if you know you can then why so many relapses. He cried.. My heart went out to him. I couldn't say anything because at that moment I thou...	Gaby	4	311	Jun 21, 2013 by Bettina
	Need an opinion- very angry at 21 year old in recovery (Preview) I am so mad right now and I am finding myself berating via text message my 21 year old son in recovery so I decided I needed to go to another place to vent my anger and get some feedback on the situation. My 21 year old is almost 16 months in recovery. We are so proud of the accomplishments he has made. Howev...	PattyS	12	313	Jun 21, 2013 by grateful2be
	child support hearing (Preview) Hi Everyone: It's been a few weeks since my AH has been staying in his apt; this past weekend our kids spent the night there so they could be there on Father's Day morning, and that seemed to go pretty well. The kids were excited to stay somewhere new (I think it felt sort of like a hotel adventure to them),...	yanksfan51	6	211	Jun 21, 2013 by grateful2be
	Dealing with Reality (Preview) I posted recently about going away for work, and being worried if AH would drink during my absence. So, the trip went well for me, but not surprisingly, he did what As do, and is back drinking. So today I tried to communicate my boundaries to him. I told him I needed to know if he was taking this recovery ser...	ParisMemories	13	838	Jun 21, 2013 by Pushka
	Seeing wrong with others (Preview) Gods grace when we seek it always brings Truth. when I'm judging another person's defects, there are ALWAYS 2 things I don't understand. first, there is always one more fact about that person's life that if I knew it I would have nothing but compassion for them. This goes for my own sick father. God has c...	WorkingThroughIt	6	353	Jun 21, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Changing what I can.... (Preview) I try my best to only bear "good news" to people. I like to keep a positive upbeat attitude despite it all. Recently I had wrote about one of my best friends from high school which I lost touch with. We are both creative people and upon or reuniting we decided we wanted to create an independent f...	RoseODAT	2	281	Jun 21, 2013 by RoseODAT
	Attended my first f2f meeting. my first counseling sessions and left my husband for the night (at least) (Preview) So, I had a busy day. I went to my first church service (a healing service) and had my first communion in over a decade. I went to my very first counseling session. I packed my suitcase and "left" my husband. And then headed to my first alanon meeting. I have been living in crazytown for so lon...	sadsusie	9	414	Jun 21, 2013 by PP
	Made myself laugh (Preview) There was a ''domestic situation'' at daughter's house a couple days ago - new drunken BF went balistic, loaded a shotgun while ranting & raving. Daughter calls me, I tell her to lock herself in bathroom and call 911 -- she's drunk too!! She didn't want to call 911 so I did - was on two phones at onc...	Path to Serenity	11	408	Jun 21, 2013 by Debilyn
	Dealing with Sister (Preview) Hi, I am having a hard time having a relationship with my older sister. I've managed for the past few years by living thousands of miles away, but currently we're both living in our hometown and helping my father at his office. She has been sober for a few months and I find myself becoming increasingly r...	linnylou	3	569	Jun 20, 2013 by pinkchip
	The right way to act after a bender - remorse. Hangover remorse enabling girlfriend help (Preview) I'm fairly new to this but long story short, my girlfriend is an alchoholic. She goes on crazy benders (a lot more infrequently than she used to thank god) but nonetheless it happens. My question is what is the best way to deal with the hangover? When she finally comes out of it and is feeling like microwa...	nelson619	10	7325	Jun 20, 2013 by Pushka
	Is there a link to the "slogans"? (Preview) I am so impressed with all the great slogans that I hear people use here on the board and in chat. Is there a link to a place where they are all listed (hopefully with explanations of what each means and how I can use it). I cannot tell everyone how much just repeating the 3 Cs (I didn't cause it, I can't cure i...	lgnutah	5	584	Jun 20, 2013 by lgnutah
	Abusive Personalities vs Alcoholism (Preview) Hi, I haven't been on here in a while. Last time I posted, I was going through the slow agony of grieving the loss of my marriage...at the time, we were still living under the same roof. AH was still drinking. He had been having an affair and I knew it, I was just in denial, sorting through my fee...	Minaret	3	525	Jun 20, 2013 by hotrod
	Unmet expectations... (Preview) God will do for me what I cannot and often time will not do for myself. Dinner last evening was an expectation. Not a biggie...promises were made along with plans and though I wasn't looking forward to something I would have no control over unless it was me alone it turned out to be another exclamati...	Jerry F	6	324	Jun 20, 2013 by bud
	Dinner tonight... (Preview) And my eldest son will be in attendance along with my program and without unnecessary mention our Higher Power. His house is out of order...a shambles...looking like an old cabin long forgotten in the deep woods; abandoned. He has lived the metaphor of a life forgotten, undone, trashed and I wil...	Jerry F	9	498	Jun 19, 2013 by ilovedogs
	When there is nothing left to give. (Preview) My life (our life) has continued to be stressful. MY AH is continuing his path of personal destruction, and unfortunately I allowed myself to be consumed by the rubble. I have destroyed my laptop, my bedroom door, and my morale. I suppose all these years of feeling and being controlled makes me all the...	sadsusie	10	715	Jun 19, 2013 by grateful2be
	Disappointed about medical funding situation... but okay. (Preview) I said the Serenity Prayer a few times today and I'm okay. I was informed that I did not qualify for sliding scale medical assistance from a community clinic, to simply get a physical and some basic blood work done. I'm down to 121 lbs, from 142 just over a year ago. Do not have a clue as to why I'm losing t...	John	7	418	Jun 19, 2013 by pinkchip
	Good Day - Day 2 (Preview) So today I continued keeping the focus on me. When I woke up this morning, no kidding, but there was a tune vrunning through my head	ParisMemories	5	197	Jun 19, 2013 by el-cee
	Ups and downs and down some more (Preview) I've been off the boards for 3 months since we came home from Thailand with my son. He had a 3 week beer binge, in Phuket. No food. He wound up in the ICU He was a mess. I went there and brought him home. We went right to the local ER where they scanned and MRIed his head and found he was ok. He looked and spoke like...	laurab	3	490	Jun 19, 2013 by el-cee
	My feeling change like the wind (Preview) Back in my Unsure mode. Ah sober 7 which I will stop referring to . ah . Has been out of my home for 30 days but not completely he would find a way to come back home for something . I had a long talk with him the other day positive ! I opened up and told him my inventory hmmmm was that a smart move on my half at the time...	Ms co-dependent	10	669	Jun 18, 2013 by Ms co-dependent
	Am I enabling? enabling work conflict arguments stress (Preview) My girlfriend owns a bar and I am the head bartender at it too. Great job for an alchoholic I know! Sometimes she falls out with her business partner, goes on a bender and nearly closes the doors for good. We work predominantly all our shifts together and when a bender is finished and she is pissed off with...	nelson619	9	6983	Jun 18, 2013 by Mattie
	Life of PI (Preview) I was asked to watch the movie " Life of Pi " and how I can relate to the Tiger. I watched it this morning and I'm having a hard time with it. Don't know why but I can't seem to quit crying....Why? Is it because I need to live with life on Life's terms, that I can't control and that I have to let go? I...	Cathyinaz	12	541	Jun 18, 2013 by Temple
	Good day (Preview) It was hard, but today I kept the focus on me. He is doing what he does, but I am determined to find good in this day.	ParisMemories	6	372	Jun 18, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Psychologist needing Al Anon (Preview) I have gone to several beginners meetings and found be wonderful wonderful, but regular meetings are troubling to me. Hearing the individual experiences and the pain that accompanies feels like a extension of my work day. Although I get a great deal from the teachings, it is not enough to overcome th...	Harriet Zilber	18	786	Jun 18, 2013 by tiredtonite
	A phone call... (Preview) I got a phone call from my son that is currently in rehab on Saturday and I was scared to talk to him because I felt I was going to have a complete break down after not been able to talk to him in 35 days. But he sounds great and after so long he also shared that he quit smoking. I believe in my heart he wants sobrie...	Gaby	13	497	Jun 18, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Create Value with everything you do.! (Preview) Suggestions when your not feeling your best: Open your life by finding ways to help others Expand the activities in your life. Be a positive influence wherever you go. Don't be a whiner. Don't dwell in the past. Look for solutions. Pray to expand your life force. Be convinced that everything is for...	Bettina	5	257	Jun 18, 2013 by Jerry F
	Mixed feelings (Preview) I would like to share with you where I am right now. My son is still homeless, he has not sorted anything out in terms of housing because he has court, that has been ongoing since January, so he thinks it would be useless to get accomodation if there is a chance he will go to prison. I have not heard from him fo...	el-cee	8	379	Jun 18, 2013 by Gaby
	I must have stupid on my forehead (Preview) I can see the affects almost immediately, I can smell it and taste it, but no I am not drinking. You must be mistaken. It is only water. Wow.	Jen61	14	581	Jun 18, 2013 by Jen61
	A stranger on my back porch (Preview) I went to work today. I went through the front door of the large historic building that I work in and parked my car on the side of the building close to the front steps. I do that because we have a circular drive in an inner-city neighborhood and it helps to cut down on folks using my drive to sell drugs. So...	grateful2be	7	513	Jun 18, 2013 by el-cee
	Detachment is complex (Preview) Going through the detachment process and really experiencing what it means is more complicated than I had anticipated. 1. My moods are just not the same for an elongated period of days or weeks. It is changing every day in terms of if I am happy and want to be around people, or sad. 2. And the types of actua...	giraffe13	14	461	Jun 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	slight set back tonight (Preview) My A went to pick up dinner 10 min from our house and was gone an hour and 15. And of course it's a place that has a bar and she has sat alone there drinking. The bad news is that I asked her if she was drinking and of course she denied it. The good news is that I stayed calm, there was no drama, and I don't believ...	Lyne	5	273	Jun 17, 2013 by Bettina
	Crazy is as crazy does (Preview) Something that Pinkchip shared with me recently has recently stuck with me: the statement in the subject: crazy is as crazy does. I don't know how many of you do this but I find myself still analyzing all of my AH's actions. It's infuriating that I waste my mental energy trying to figure out the actions...	ilovedogs	6	428	Jun 17, 2013 by abbyalana
	Peace and quiet ... (Preview) It has been a peaceful day today the first one since last Friday evening and I am VERY grateful at this point. It's pretty sad when I realized that OMGosh .. today is the first day I haven't seen a deputy, been to the court house, gotten any texts OR had to deal with my atty. That's pretty huge. Instead of...	Pushka	5	432	Jun 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	Do as I practice doing... (Preview) You all know I'm a double. You all know that I started in Al-Anon before entering AA. I took my Al-Anon program into those rooms or else. I am long past wondering or worrying how another alcoholic reacts to my programing. I know that guilt and shame on my part works wonders for their parts and soooo...	Jerry F	4	299	Jun 17, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	Step 6 (Preview) 'http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54066479/step-6-alanon/	hotrod	0	299	Jun 16, 2013 by hotrod
	Your ESH needed - please (Preview) My son has relapsed (yet again) and had checked himself into the psych unit where he remained for 2 weeks. he was diagnosed with major depression and put on meds. Currently he's in inpatient facility for alcohol abuse where he's receiving counseling and attending AA meetings. He recently lost his j...	Rose50	12	400	Jun 16, 2013 by MeTwo2
	Dad goes back to work Mondayh (Preview) Hey Everyone, My father goes back to work on Monday after being on disability for depression/alcoholism. This time though he said he has a meeting with HR, his boss, his boss' boss and the rehab person from the insurance company that does his disability insurance. He sounded surprisingly upbeat abo...	slogan_jim	12	439	Jun 16, 2013 by grateful2be
	Father's Day (Preview) To all of the men who are fathers in any capacity, here is a Happy Father's Day greeting to you....and thank you for your service.	PP	4	296	Jun 16, 2013 by Jerry F
	Just checking in..life hard today (Preview) I write on here rarely but I'm feeling upset tonight. My man has been doing brilliantly..or so I think. He has reduced his alcohol intake to 4 pints a night, a little more on weekends. Well he has had to. he has got into such debt after subsidising his drinking with payday loans that he is now in troubl...	Cherubhmm	3	299	Jun 16, 2013 by PP
	Self defeating Attitudes (Preview) I recently posted on Attitude and how I perceived it so vague I couldn't even see the word clear. It was basically to me a negative feeling I was casting through the air. It Felt like a Major Defect, and who knows for me, maybe it is. I began to view it as what am I telling my mind. Am I constantly putting i...	MeTwo2	6	521	Jun 16, 2013 by MeTwo2
	need to connect (Preview) I'm uncomfortable with this. My fella tried to get help, but they said they couldn't help because it wasn't daily. It's been a year, or so I think, but the results are no different- no keys, no wallet, a pocket full of receipts, at least this time no car which means someone dropped him off. Hours of worry,...	AngieK	5	282	Jun 16, 2013 by grateful2be
	INSPIRATIONAL THOUGHTS (Preview) Everything passes. Both soaring joy and crushing sorrows fade away like a dream. However, the knowledge of having lived one's life to the fullest never disappears!	Bettina	7	275	Jun 15, 2013 by slogan_jim
	help .. status's (Preview) assuming others have also had this experience ? needing ' emotional ' support. This weekend we have family in town that are very successful financial and status wise. They own a firm and are beautiful people and yet I see through the busy of making things look good. On the surface, everything looks...	MeTwo2	3	304	Jun 15, 2013 by MeTwo2
	How to tell my AH I'm not ready yet (Preview) My ah sober 7 months has been a little better to deal with. With him not here in the home I'm able to function and think on my own. My emotions still are up and down but I seem to catch it fast enought to control them.. The lack of al Alon meetings I have not been attending do to child care I still go up in my room an...	Ms co-dependent	6	689	Jun 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	AlAnon technique for coping (Preview) I have a dear friend who I don't get to see as often as I like. She and I met today, and she told me she learned a coping technique at her AlAnon meeting which I thought sounded like one I can try. (Disclaimer: I didn't attend the F2F meeting, so might not have the technique down pat) She said: when you are g...	lgnutah	4	369	Jun 15, 2013 by el-cee
	I am such a mess! (Preview) Hello Everyone, I am scared. I doubt most will understand the depths of despair i am in and feeling. I have never been a big man. The most i have ever weighed was 142 lbs at 5"11'. I have worn a size 32 pant in the waist since my early 20's. Now, i am 54 and in the last 2 years i lost 24 lbs, 4 pant sizes for an a...	John	35	2315	Jun 14, 2013 by Pushka
	If it isn't happening now... (Preview) Why fear it now. Trust God...clean house...help others. My mind was trying to give me cause to fear and panic while I was working yesterday doing labor in my yard. I got to revisit an event which happened after and as a result of being in a head-on accident. When the EMTs came to take me out of the wreck...	Jerry F	9	419	Jun 14, 2013 by Jozie
	Funny New Court Story - The God of my understanding (Preview) Since I have been living at the court house recently it's been very entertaining to say the least. I love to people watch and then it's funny as you see the same people as far as law enforcement and people who work there, it's an interesting system. It's not always fair and it's not always just, .. at lea...	Pushka	5	488	Jun 14, 2013 by Jackie11
	day by day it gets easier(so I think I will hang in) (Preview) So day by day it gets easier to recover from anything! Today it is my vision; tomorrow it will be something else but I am ready to face whatever comes my way! For all who don't know this has been quite of road of recovery for me. I have been in & out of this program for many years. I am just now learning how t...	Hoot Nanny	3	441	Jun 14, 2013 by hotrod
	What to do? (Preview) so...today the exA stopped by to put up a heavy bag for my 16yo son. After the job was done he asked my son to go out in the driveway...I heard a pop-pop -- he was showing my son his that his silencer is now made to fit on his .22. There is always this subtle message of violence...and I hate it. He knows I hate gun...	rehprof	10	489	Jun 14, 2013 by lgnutah
	Court Update .. (Preview) Things are moving along at expedited speeds and that is a good thing. There is another pre-trial date in about 4 weeks which means I will meet with STBAX, his atty and mine in the next two weeks. At least I think so .. I am grateful that there is an end date and all of a sudden things got REALLY serious. T...	Pushka	8	405	Jun 14, 2013 by grateful2be
	Supervised visitation; ignoring boundaries (Preview) I am not sure what to do. My exah has supervised visitation which is also what our 12 yo daughter wants/is comfortable with. BUT he continues to break boundaries and I am not sure how far to push back. Last night he gt a new cell number & contacted her drunk & told her to keep it a secret from me. She s...	abbyalana	5	399	Jun 14, 2013 by Pushka
	Scared... (Preview) This is my first post. I am scared. My Therapist said 'Go to an Al-Anon meeting. It will help." I'm afraid to go. I'm afraid AH and I will fight. He's a weekend binge drinker. He's done this his whole life. He was raised around it. When you're not working you drink. He doesn't do it during t...	IrishMama6	7	297	Jun 14, 2013 by grateful2be
	Tryin to Find Balance.... (Preview) In an Unbalanced World... How is it that in this Disease it seems the only time i Feel my Feet Safely planted on the ground is when i am surrounded by Chaos? I don't get it... When things pop Up and I Have No Time to 'Over Think it' It seems it rolls smoother, but when i take the time to Respond instead of React,...	Jozie	3	405	Jun 14, 2013 by Bettina
	I don't know what to do.... (Preview) My husband has been sober for a few years he had been going to meetings faithfully. I just found out that he has been lying about going to meetings. He has been going to "meetings" and working steps with newcomers. I confronted my husband about it and asked him where he had been. At first he sai...	newgirl17	10	766	Jun 13, 2013 by Bettina
	Help for atheists (Preview) I feel like the 12 step and AA which is touted as the only way to stop drugs and drinking when you are bad off is too heavily centered around the Christian Faith. for someone like me who doesn't believe in any religion whatsoever there is no difference between us and animals and no paranormal outsider is g...	4st7lb	14	591	Jun 13, 2013 by likemyheart
	Do A's understand English? (Preview) I've tried to explain some issues to my A as clearly and detailed as possible, and without hostility. She doesn't get it, doesn't want to get it, got it and blocked it right out, or speaks some other language than myself. I honestly think I can communicate better with my 2 yr old granddaughter! A's ar...	Lyne	12	476	Jun 13, 2013 by flinn66
	What to do? (Preview) I will be married to my AH for 27 years next month. We have been together since the age of 13 and were married and had two boys by the age of 21. He became an alcoholic going on 6 years now, when his brother died of a sudden heart attack, who also was an alcoholic. We did the counseling three years ago, he gave t...	ms1414	3	364	Jun 13, 2013 by Jerry F
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