Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

breamanic665 · breamanic665

Forgive me for throwing myself back into the ocean to drown myself. He has moved out all his stuff except for whats in the garage. I need the rest gone. I am losing my home because I can't afford the bills on my own. I have to be out by the 30th. After he lost this last job, he sought sobriety treatment, and de...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I was sitting here feeling frustrated, as usual. AH and I had a nasty conversation the other day about this whole house buying thing. Finally I told him that I'd be the one to move out and I will rent because there was not way in he** I was going to sign any papers to take on a second mortgage with him. He ma...

tortuga · tortuga

So our love is gone, our dreams are gone, our pregnancy is gone. I think I have never felt that lonely and hurt before...my self-worth too is at the bottom after all the accusations and name calling. I have done so many mistakes in the past months.... when I once thought i found my way to deal with life and b...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

Thank you to everyone who sent out a prayer to me or sent me positive energy. Last night was the first night in two weeks that I slept through the night! This is such a difficult time for me and just having the power of those prayers was enough to restore my faith. xoxoxooxox

Gaby · Gaby

I need support all the support I can have.. I go to my meetings .. I go to AA meetings to understand the disease.. I get on line to share. I keep in contact with my Sponser.. I just need more support. I feel alone when I know I am not.. The last I seen my son was Friday around 2pm.. I extended myself again to get hi...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Answered the phone. I knew it was her. When the phone rings and it is her, my whole body sort of slumps and I have to take a few moments to consider...do I really want to do this? Do I have enough to give today? Don't get me wrong. I care about A's mum. She has a loving heart and, unlike any other "mother in...

Jerry F · Jerry F

If anyone ever tries to tell me that we can't have fun when we want to I'm gonna tell them to "keep coming back". The meeting topic was Attitude which I will always show up for and then it was over and the food came out and then the "secret" by number gift exhange/swap and we got kno...

neshema2 · neshema2

I am at work...EVERYONE knows NOT to call me unless it is emergency.....My A brother (my close one) knows my days bc I tell him ea. Sunday, "these are my days....NO calls" I am on my boss's computer working on the G/L making sure accounts are "ok" and no adjustments needed and phon...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning all The son is on another cycle of drinking or drugs so will this time when he either gets hurt or comes down hard and he starts calling will I stay on my side of the street this time. Last time was my mistake of going to the hospital when I really didn't need to. This is like starting again for t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

So, every day is not rosey. I guess today could be one of those days if I let it. I am really just beginning my day. Time is going so fast that it is almost scary & hard to bear. But, in recovery we take it a day at a time. I am not an expert at anything but there are some things I do well. I am searching for more b...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

Hi everyone....I am asking for some positive thoughts/prayers to be sent my way because I can't stop beating myself up. I am harder on myself than anyone else in my life. I am especially being hard on myself because I am very vulnerable right now as I go through a break up and an old qualifier is trying to w...

swood31 · swood31

For you that have read my past posts. My worst nightmare came true. My husband (34 years old) died suddenly in front of me on November 5th, 2013. I tried saving him & then the ambulance didn't make it in time. I had already called the ambulance earlier in the night when he started feeling really b...

Dotty2 · Dotty2

My son is coming up on 1 year clean and sober. I am suspecting an alcohol relapse. His behavior mimics old behavior. I detected a smell of what may be alcohol, and today his hands shook uncontrollably for several seconds. Ii know I am powerless, but I am filled with fear that it will escalate. He is on prob...

Gaby · Gaby

So my son left the SLE HOME yesterday morning.. I again went out to look for him why ?? Because I just can't seem to let go.. Yes I found him parked in front of a pond shop.. I pulled in asking I want the car back n he can live his life.. He said NO!! I told him your addiction is out of control he agrees then I said I'...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

The place I'm at now is strange. I feel pretty good but I don't know where God wants me. i mean, I kind of do but I kind of really don't know at all. I'm an Adult Child, Alanon AND an Alcoholic. I fit in everywhere but nowhere. It's weird. one thing I am experiencing is that I am at Step 1 in Alanon. I've been real...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Dear crazy neighbour. Thank-you for your unbelievably rude (and lengthy) note in my mailbox yesterday, and for the time you took to collect your patronising collection of pamphlets about "responsible pet ownership". I've never met you but I'm told that you are very advanced in age and p...

Tricia911 · Tricia911

What a very long week I have had. I allowed myself to become enmeshed in yet another situation that was not mine to take on. But, somehow I ended up smack in the middle of. Tues at 9AM a neighbor called and said the Sheriff was on the way to evict her. Not a huge surprise to me, she had not paid her mortgage in tw...

Tricia911 · Tricia911

A humble strategy to survive holiday gatherings. (1) Begin by considering what you have, as not the absolute worst thing to have. At least there is something to complain about when we have family.Think of children who survived the Holocaust who have no memories of their parents, or very few left...

Gaby · Gaby

He left the SLE HOUSE.. He is out there trying to get his next fix.. God is by me.. I feel the strength. I have done all I can do. All I can do now is pray !!! But I am so worried. I need peace !!

neshema2 · neshema2

MORE HELPFUL ACA/Al-Anon SAYINGSIf you've been around 12 Step programs at all,you've heard at least one of these.Here's just a SMALL list of some of the sayingsyou'll hear around the "rooms." "When you're home by yourself you're behind enemy lines." "If you share you...

oldergal · oldergal

If you buy a nice gift they will sell it, if you give them money they will drink it....funny, but not funny, I am stumped... og A nice dinner is what seems to come to my mind....

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want!

glad · glad

Came on here and looked up old post because I am so thankful, I no longer have that turning in my gut.. the constant pain that comes with allowing an Alcoholic room in my mind or heart... that feeling I was addicted to like an emotional cutter.... About two years ago.. I literally felt like it was death...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Dear friends Today is an important day for my A husband. He has an important meeting that could go very well or very poorly. He is so much better than he was one year ago, but the demons are still there. I am also much much healthier, but I still am worrying today about the "what ifs". What if he...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I can't seem to get the nerve or whatever motivation maybe to get some cards sent out to my friends & loved ones this year. I feel like I am always doing this & sometimes getting anxious & even frustrated w/ the whole process. I am doing things anonymously this year though. I am not going to to...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I just got back from my annual well woman visit. The doc found a mass under my right arm, in the armpit area next to my breast. She said it felt fluid filled, which I'm hoping is a good sign that it's not cancer. She wants me to get an ultrasound and a mammogram. I am already frustrated with insurance iss...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Things are crazy with finals next week Monday and Wednesday for my last 2 classes, I have passed and am done with the other 2 this week and passed them with A's, but the next 2 are the harder ones for sure. I need all the prayers and good thoughts my MIP family can muster. I have to score pretty good on Mondays...

BeeBee · BeeBee

I have been dealing with an alcoholic Aunt (half Aunt) since I was a child; (I am now 52) and she is 56. She has been in and out of treatment too many times to count, and was sober for almost 8 years and started drinking again about a year ago. She has not been able to hold down a job and has depended on the fam...

Raven Juniper · Raven Juniper

So yeah, it takes a lot of work for me to enjoy this season, especially the past decade plus... My parents and only sibling are gone, and I have very little contact with my older sons, and none with my daughter. Long story short, bad bad divorce and aftermath. So this year, my 2 oldest sons are without vehi...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

Any advice out there as to how people deal with their obsession and control? Can't seem to turn off my brain sometimes and just give it to my higher power. Any tools or coping mechanisms people have learned? Corgi

sotiredofit · sotiredofit

I have been married 19 years and have three children. He used to be a wonderful person. Until he became an alcoholic 4 years ago. I kicked him out a few weeks ago and have started divorce proceedings. We've been through AA and alanon and individual counseling and couples counseling and counseling for...

Gaby · Gaby

So my son moved into another SLE HOUSE. I had to ask him to leave Tuesday morning. It was just to hard to have him at home after him getting kicked out of the SLE APARTMENTS FOR A dirty test. So he found this home on his own an seems to like it. Today marks 5 days clean. My problem is detach, worry and fear. But I p...

glad · glad

He is now with someone like him (and it's weird how happy that makes me, spooky weird) , I now have someone (I am taking it very very slowly with) who is so much like me it's awesome!! really it's odd.. but good odd.. I'm glad for both of us,,, but will I ever stop wishing my ex A well and "holding him d...

neshema2 · neshema2

Hey Paula, my good friend I am hoping that your boss has done something about security at your place of work.....That "near miss" was NOT something u need to be living with...I hope boss took this REAL serious...You are waaaay to precious to be at risk like that... Let us know how you are doin...

kn1228 · kn1228

Hello everyone, I wanted to check in and let you all know I do come in and read time to time. I have been working my program to the fullest I can and today when I lay down I can sleep. It had been years since that has happened. I joined the step board, yet to post but enjoy looking around and am thankful for it to b...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

My AH is still going through with buying a house. I am NOT ok with it. Do I speak my concerns to him or let things play out? If we get divorced, this is a community property state so both houses would be considered our assets. I'm just concerned about losing our savings for now as it would get lost in this new...

pinkchip · pinkchip

At work - I wrote an email about how techs could be doing a better job at a few things. Lead tech responded trying to tell me that it is the job of the clinician to do this and that and stop pointing the finger at techs and be a team player. Um...I feel like I do their job all the time which is understandable in...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I was looking for some Pod Casts and I came across this. Al-anon speakers..parents talking about their Children and Alcoholism....their stories. http://storiesofrecovery.org/Parents.htm

hotrod · hotrod

Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 7 has been posted to the Step Work BoardHere is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t55900128/step...

oldergal · oldergal

I had an unhealthy relationship with my son, I found that I was blaming myself for how he turned out, although I may have not raised him perfectly but I did my best with what I knew at the time. I latter learned to meditate and started living from the inside out. To me meditation put alot of my life in prospec...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

My Sunday was a day to relax and watch movies. My son texts me that he is out of food and will not have any for 3 more days. I have been reading a lot this morning about stopping the enabling and stopping the recuses NO MATTER what happens. I hurt and feel sad but this has to be done. I can't step in anymore...

el-cee · el-cee

At my meeting tonight the topic was giving and receiving. Sounds nice and just in time for Christmas. I thought about this in terms of my relationship with my son. I give - way too much and he receives too much. I give him too much thought, too much of my time thinking about him, too much of my happiness, wor...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi Everyone I have this overwhelming feeling all the time I need to take care of this, I need to do that. I need to help..no I can't do that...and on and on and on. My faith is not strong. I can't let go. I have read any and all I can find on posts about faith. I found a response from Jerry F back in 2011 that w...

John · John

Katytexasmom · Katytexasmom

My son called me tonight and said he's ready to stop! He does not know what to do or how to do this. He was told by his father that I knew of a place he could go. I've heard of a place that works on donations but I don't know anything about them. he has no vehicle or phone (used his dads to call) and wanted to go ton...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

Hi everyone, it has been a very long time since I have been on this site and I am glad to see it is still here to give people the peace and serenity it once did for me. I have been out of a relationship with an alcoholic/drug addict for almost two years and my life became beyond better than I could have ever imag...

Kent · Kent

I am a relatively new member of alanon (I've been to maybe 5 meetings in the last ten days), but I already see the many ways in which it can benefit my life and my relationships. While my mother is not an alcoholic (nor is she an ACOA), I feel like she could really benefit from this program as well. I say tha...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

As I go deeper in recovery and have more to work with, in my tenth steps I see over and over a pattern where I have accepted probably two hundred times in my life, beginning with my parents, where others will point the finger at me and blame me for their own dysfunction, fears and shame. i am carrying the sha...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I know I can change, I know I can change, I can change! I am praying on the situation I am having at my one & only meeting. I am not considering the fact that my tension is due to the fact that I have trouble w/ principles before personalities. I am human & feel hurt like humans do. I hope that maybe I ca...

Brighter Days · Brighter Days

I have lived with a high functioning alcoholic for over 10 years and only in the past 10 months have I really recognized the effics it has had on me. I was determined not to become co-dependent however I never understood the real meaning of co-dependancy. I am co-dependent! Last March my alcoholic husb...

cwya · cwya

I got a new job which may or may not be a good thing. Turns out my new boss seems to be having some serious emotional issues that unfortunately are spilling over into the workplace. I think I'm losing perspective about her behavior. I know I tend to have thin skin, something I've never been able to make...

sadsusie · sadsusie

It was only a matter of time. It started with the odoul's, moved into the beer, and is now I am certain..moved back into the liquor. I can't help but be sad. I mean I keep my head above the water and have fun at my business and bought some crafts to work on..but I wanted to cry on the drive home. Guess that's no...

Jozie · Jozie

Happy Tues. Everyone... I Can't Say Mine has been Bad, but these Last Few Weeks have me Mentally & Physically Exhausted beyond words, and I Just can't put a Finger on Why? I had a Very Emotional Thanksgiving Week, I think just Missing My MIL who past Just Before the Holiday & My AFather , and Kn...

PP · PP

I am rattled and not feeling so safe tonight. I know that the store where I worked alone this evening was being scoped out for a potential robbery...I felt it, I felt my fear, I was present to the danger and did not ignore it. I was planning out what to do all the while engaging the young man in a conversat...

Lyne · Lyne

Thanks for the support yesterday! It was interesting. The A got very angry several times. I only briefly felt scared or anxious. It left within minutes. It came up several times, and it left several times. This is amazing progress for me. I am much more in control of myself. THANK YOU ALANON! ...

Nightingale · Nightingale

Yesterday my SABF became really angry with me out of the blue. We were having a great day and then all of a sudden Mr. Hyde made an appearance. He wouldn't even speak to me. Personally I think he was looking for an excuse to go binge on chocolate ice cream...which he did. I didn't feel like playing into it so...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I really don't want to stay away anymore. I am afraid that this might be my only way of communicating w/ Al anon. I am trying to find a happy medium in dealing w/ others in the program. I feel shut-out at meetings & find myself hurt & not wanting to go back. I don't feel that I have the time necessary t...

tortuga · tortuga

Hi MIP family, I have been away some time, ... the merry-go-round got me ...totally this time. I had become pregnant with my ex A. we have been through the 'honeymoon phase' after a violent episode. I feel like a fool coming to write here now, when I should have known better, already before. I wrote here a...

John · John

I was asked in a PM why we don't use more forceful measures, stronger words, etc. To get an abused person to open their eyes, run to face to face meetings, subject them to shaming or guilt riddled statements or opinions about how it might be effecting children under the roof, etc. I replied and wanted to...

lgnutah · lgnutah

Before I realized that my daughter was an A, back when I believed that everyone else had a problem/was telling lies about her/that she really would pay me back/that it would all be my fault if i didnt help her, etc, I thought it just odd that she had so many car accidents (mostly scrapes along the sides, bu...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	How I am drowning myself (Preview) Forgive me for throwing myself back into the ocean to drown myself. He has moved out all his stuff except for whats in the garage. I need the rest gone. I am losing my home because I can't afford the bills on my own. I have to be out by the 30th. After he lost this last job, he sought sobriety treatment, and de...	breamanic665	3	497	Dec 16, 2013 by breamanic665
	LOL! I feel like I need to post daily these days! (Preview) I was sitting here feeling frustrated, as usual. AH and I had a nasty conversation the other day about this whole house buying thing. Finally I told him that I'd be the one to move out and I will rent because there was not way in he** I was going to sign any papers to take on a second mortgage with him. He ma...	ilovedogs	13	428	Dec 16, 2013 by el-cee
	Awareness-Acceptance-Action...and Coping with Withdrawal from the A (Preview) So our love is gone, our dreams are gone, our pregnancy is gone. I think I have never felt that lonely and hurt before...my self-worth too is at the bottom after all the accusations and name calling. I have done so many mistakes in the past months.... when I once thought i found my way to deal with life and b...	tortuga	5	856	Dec 16, 2013 by tortuga
	I felt the support (Preview) Thank you to everyone who sent out a prayer to me or sent me positive energy. Last night was the first night in two weeks that I slept through the night! This is such a difficult time for me and just having the power of those prayers was enough to restore my faith. xoxoxooxox	Corgi2	4	246	Dec 15, 2013 by PP
	My son is MIA!!! It hurts.. (Preview) I need support all the support I can have.. I go to my meetings .. I go to AA meetings to understand the disease.. I get on line to share. I keep in contact with my Sponser.. I just need more support. I feel alone when I know I am not.. The last I seen my son was Friday around 2pm.. I extended myself again to get hi...	Gaby	14	490	Dec 15, 2013 by oldergal
	Talking to the A's mum (Preview) Answered the phone. I knew it was her. When the phone rings and it is her, my whole body sort of slumps and I have to take a few moments to consider...do I really want to do this? Do I have enough to give today? Don't get me wrong. I care about A's mum. She has a loving heart and, unlike any other "mother in...	Melly1248	18	572	Dec 15, 2013 by Raven Juniper
	Super Saturday Al-Anon Christmas Party. (Preview) If anyone ever tries to tell me that we can't have fun when we want to I'm gonna tell them to "keep coming back". The meeting topic was Attitude which I will always show up for and then it was over and the food came out and then the "secret" by number gift exhange/swap and we got kno...	Jerry F	6	488	Dec 15, 2013 by hotrod
	Oh no!!! Hes at it again (Preview) I am at work...EVERYONE knows NOT to call me unless it is emergency.....My A brother (my close one) knows my days bc I tell him ea. Sunday, "these are my days....NO calls" I am on my boss's computer working on the G/L making sure accounts are "ok" and no adjustments needed and phon...	neshema2	6	430	Dec 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	Another cycle (Preview) Good Morning all The son is on another cycle of drinking or drugs so will this time when he either gets hurt or comes down hard and he starts calling will I stay on my side of the street this time. Last time was my mistake of going to the hospital when I really didn't need to. This is like starting again for t...	Cathyinaz	5	337	Dec 15, 2013 by hotrod
	every day is not rosey (Preview) So, every day is not rosey. I guess today could be one of those days if I let it. I am really just beginning my day. Time is going so fast that it is almost scary & hard to bear. But, in recovery we take it a day at a time. I am not an expert at anything but there are some things I do well. I am searching for more b...	Hoot Nanny	4	328	Dec 15, 2013 by Melly1248
	Asking for prayers.... (Preview) Hi everyone....I am asking for some positive thoughts/prayers to be sent my way because I can't stop beating myself up. I am harder on myself than anyone else in my life. I am especially being hard on myself because I am very vulnerable right now as I go through a break up and an old qualifier is trying to w...	Corgi2	6	293	Dec 15, 2013 by mm830
	My husband died (Preview) For you that have read my past posts. My worst nightmare came true. My husband (34 years old) died suddenly in front of me on November 5th, 2013. I tried saving him & then the ambulance didn't make it in time. I had already called the ambulance earlier in the night when he started feeling really b...	swood31	33	1117	Dec 15, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Not In Control And So Sad (Preview) My son is coming up on 1 year clean and sober. I am suspecting an alcohol relapse. His behavior mimics old behavior. I detected a smell of what may be alcohol, and today his hands shook uncontrollably for several seconds. Ii know I am powerless, but I am filled with fear that it will escalate. He is on prob...	Dotty2	9	574	Dec 15, 2013 by afglin
	This is a horrible feeling... (Preview) So my son left the SLE HOME yesterday morning.. I again went out to look for him why ?? Because I just can't seem to let go.. Yes I found him parked in front of a pond shop.. I pulled in asking I want the car back n he can live his life.. He said NO!! I told him your addiction is out of control he agrees then I said I'...	Gaby	8	505	Dec 15, 2013 by el-cee
	Waiting for God to reveal more (Preview) The place I'm at now is strange. I feel pretty good but I don't know where God wants me. i mean, I kind of do but I kind of really don't know at all. I'm an Adult Child, Alanon AND an Alcoholic. I fit in everywhere but nowhere. It's weird. one thing I am experiencing is that I am at Step 1 in Alanon. I've been real...	WorkingThroughIt	6	540	Dec 14, 2013 by Jerry F
	Thanks, neighbour! (Preview) Dear crazy neighbour. Thank-you for your unbelievably rude (and lengthy) note in my mailbox yesterday, and for the time you took to collect your patronising collection of pamphlets about "responsible pet ownership". I've never met you but I'm told that you are very advanced in age and p...	Melly1248	18	529	Dec 14, 2013 by sadsusie
	A look back on my week and when I did and did not use my Al-Anon principles! (Preview) What a very long week I have had. I allowed myself to become enmeshed in yet another situation that was not mine to take on. But, somehow I ended up smack in the middle of. Tues at 9AM a neighbor called and said the Sheriff was on the way to evict her. Not a huge surprise to me, she had not paid her mortgage in tw...	Tricia911	6	440	Dec 14, 2013 by el-cee
	My strategy for surviving the holidays. (Preview) A humble strategy to survive holiday gatherings. (1) Begin by considering what you have, as not the absolute worst thing to have. At least there is something to complain about when we have family.Think of children who survived the Holocaust who have no memories of their parents, or very few left...	Tricia911	3	1045	Dec 14, 2013 by grateful2be
	Again!!! My son is out there again.. (Preview) He left the SLE HOUSE.. He is out there trying to get his next fix.. God is by me.. I feel the strength. I have done all I can do. All I can do now is pray !!! But I am so worried. I need peace !!	Gaby	12	557	Dec 14, 2013 by PP
	some Alanon/ACOA sayings....swiped from houstonacas.com... (Preview) MORE HELPFUL ACA/Al-Anon SAYINGSIf you've been around 12 Step programs at all,*you've heard at least one of these.Here's just a SMALL list of some of the sayingsyou'll hear around the "rooms."* "When you're home by yourself you're behind enemy lines." "If you share you...	neshema2	9	674	Dec 14, 2013 by Tricia911
	HMMM....what do you buy an alcoholic/addict for Christmas (Preview) If you buy a nice gift they will sell it, if you give them money they will drink it....funny, but not funny, I am stumped... og A nice dinner is what seems to come to my mind....	oldergal	15	699	Dec 14, 2013 by grateful2be
	quote (Preview) Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want!	Hoot Nanny	4	225	Dec 14, 2013 by milkwood
	Replacing bad memories with new Good memories... (Preview) Came on here and looked up old post because I am so thankful, I no longer have that turning in my gut.. the constant pain that comes with allowing an Alcoholic room in my mind or heart... that feeling I was addicted to like an emotional cutter.... About two years ago.. I literally felt like it was death...	glad	7	615	Dec 14, 2013 by kn1228
	Extra prayers please (Preview) Dear friends Today is an important day for my A husband. He has an important meeting that could go very well or very poorly. He is so much better than he was one year ago, but the demons are still there. I am also much much healthier, but I still am worrying today about the "what ifs". What if he...	ParisMemories	10	312	Dec 14, 2013 by kn1228
	trying to send some holiday cheer... (Preview) I can't seem to get the nerve or whatever motivation maybe to get some cards sent out to my friends & loved ones this year. I feel like I am always doing this & sometimes getting anxious & even frustrated w/ the whole process. I am doing things anonymously this year though. I am not going to to...	Hoot Nanny	6	339	Dec 14, 2013 by mm830
	OT: doc found a mass (Preview) I just got back from my annual well woman visit. The doc found a mass under my right arm, in the armpit area next to my breast. She said it felt fluid filled, which I'm hoping is a good sign that it's not cancer. She wants me to get an ultrasound and a mammogram. I am already frustrated with insurance iss...	ilovedogs	22	696	Dec 14, 2013 by Katytexasmom
	Update on me (Preview) Things are crazy with finals next week Monday and Wednesday for my last 2 classes, I have passed and am done with the other 2 this week and passed them with A's, but the next 2 are the harder ones for sure. I need all the prayers and good thoughts my MIP family can muster. I have to score pretty good on Mondays...	Breakingfree	6	313	Dec 13, 2013 by grateful2be
	Should I feel guilty about this? (Preview) I have been dealing with an alcoholic Aunt (half Aunt) since I was a child; (I am now 52) and she is 56. She has been in and out of treatment too many times to count, and was sober for almost 8 years and started drinking again about a year ago. She has not been able to hold down a job and has depended on the fam...	BeeBee	8	566	Dec 13, 2013 by Tricia911
	Working through the holidays-Upsetting:( (Preview) So yeah, it takes a lot of work for me to enjoy this season, especially the past decade plus... My parents and only sibling are gone, and I have very little contact with my older sons, and none with my daughter. Long story short, bad bad divorce and aftermath. So this year, my 2 oldest sons are without vehi...	Raven Juniper	4	613	Dec 13, 2013 by Tricia911
	Obsession & Control (Preview) Any advice out there as to how people deal with their obsession and control? Can't seem to turn off my brain sometimes and just give it to my higher power. Any tools or coping mechanisms people have learned? Corgi	Corgi2	11	580	Dec 13, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Questioning everything - just don't know how to do this (Preview) I have been married 19 years and have three children. He used to be a wonderful person. Until he became an alcoholic 4 years ago. I kicked him out a few weeks ago and have started divorce proceedings. We've been through AA and alanon and individual counseling and couples counseling and counseling for...	sotiredofit	10	527	Dec 13, 2013 by sad_dog_mommy
	Need to VENT !! (Preview) So my son moved into another SLE HOUSE. I had to ask him to leave Tuesday morning. It was just to hard to have him at home after him getting kicked out of the SLE APARTMENTS FOR A dirty test. So he found this home on his own an seems to like it. Today marks 5 days clean. My problem is detach, worry and fear. But I p...	Gaby	6	303	Dec 13, 2013 by Green Eyes
	ehh,, it definatly gets better, I wonder how much better??? (Preview) He is now with someone like him (and it's weird how happy that makes me, spooky weird) , I now have someone (I am taking it very very slowly with) who is so much like me it's awesome!! really it's odd.. but good odd.. I'm glad for both of us,,, but will I ever stop wishing my ex A well and "holding him d...	glad	6	658	Dec 13, 2013 by glad
	Pinging--- Paula (Preview) Hey Paula, my good friend I am hoping that your boss has done something about security at your place of work.....That "near miss" was NOT something u need to be living with...I hope boss took this REAL serious...You are waaaay to precious to be at risk like that... Let us know how you are doin...	neshema2	3	266	Dec 12, 2013 by PP
	Checking in (Preview) Hello everyone, I wanted to check in and let you all know I do come in and read time to time. I have been working my program to the fullest I can and today when I lay down I can sleep. It had been years since that has happened. I joined the step board, yet to post but enjoy looking around and am thankful for it to b...	kn1228	4	276	Dec 12, 2013 by kn1228
	Quick; need advice (Preview) My AH is still going through with buying a house. I am NOT ok with it. Do I speak my concerns to him or let things play out? If we get divorced, this is a community property state so both houses would be considered our assets. I'm just concerned about losing our savings for now as it would get lost in this new...	ilovedogs	13	765	Dec 12, 2013 by PP
	Praying for restraint of tongue (Preview) At work - I wrote an email about how techs could be doing a better job at a few things. Lead tech responded trying to tell me that it is the job of the clinician to do this and that and stop pointing the finger at techs and be a team player. Um...I feel like I do their job all the time which is understandable in...	pinkchip	14	586	Dec 12, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Stories of Recovery (Preview) I was looking for some Pod Casts and I came across this. Al-anon speakers..parents talking about their Children and Alcoholism....their stories. http://storiesofrecovery.org/Parents.htm	Cathyinaz	4	2812	Dec 12, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Step 7 (Preview) Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 7 has been posted to the Step Work BoardHere is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t55900128/step...	hotrod	0	281	Dec 12, 2013 by hotrod
	Blaming Yourself (Preview) I had an unhealthy relationship with my son, I found that I was blaming myself for how he turned out, although I may have not raised him perfectly but I did my best with what I knew at the time. I latter learned to meditate and started living from the inside out. To me meditation put alot of my life in prospec...	oldergal	12	606	Dec 12, 2013 by el-cee
	I hurt (Preview) My Sunday was a day to relax and watch movies. My son texts me that he is out of food and will not have any for 3 more days. I have been reading a lot this morning about stopping the enabling and stopping the recuses NO MATTER what happens. I hurt and feel sad but this has to be done. I can't step in anymore...	Cathyinaz	22	717	Dec 12, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Giving and Receiving (Preview) At my meeting tonight the topic was giving and receiving. Sounds nice and just in time for Christmas. I thought about this in terms of my relationship with my son. I give - way too much and he receives too much. I give him too much thought, too much of my time thinking about him, too much of my happiness, wor...	el-cee	4	539	Dec 12, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Looking Up Faith (Preview) Hi Everyone I have this overwhelming feeling all the time I need to take care of this, I need to do that. I need to help..no I can't do that...and on and on and on. My faith is not strong. I can't let go. I have read any and all I can find on posts about faith. I found a response from Jerry F back in 2011 that w...	Cathyinaz	18	629	Dec 12, 2013 by Sweet Stanley
	Kudo's to our Service Workers! (Preview)	John	9	538	Dec 12, 2013 by PP
	OMG. HE WANTS TO GO TO TREATMENT! Now what??? HELP (Preview) My son called me tonight and said he's ready to stop! He does not know what to do or how to do this. He was told by his father that I knew of a place he could go. I've heard of a place that works on donations but I don't know anything about them. he has no vehicle or phone (used his dads to call) and wanted to go ton...	Katytexasmom	16	673	Dec 11, 2013 by grateful2be
	Old feelings of panic (Preview) Hi everyone, it has been a very long time since I have been on this site and I am glad to see it is still here to give people the peace and serenity it once did for me. I have been out of a relationship with an alcoholic/drug addict for almost two years and my life became beyond better than I could have ever imag...	Corgi2	5	438	Dec 11, 2013 by Corgi2
	Codependence and Detachment for a Newbie (Preview) I am a relatively new member of alanon (I've been to maybe 5 meetings in the last ten days), but I already see the many ways in which it can benefit my life and my relationships. While my mother is not an alcoholic (nor is she an ACOA), I feel like she could really benefit from this program as well. I say tha...	Kent	6	630	Dec 11, 2013 by el-cee
	Blame and Finger Pointing (Preview) As I go deeper in recovery and have more to work with, in my tenth steps I see over and over a pattern where I have accepted probably two hundred times in my life, beginning with my parents, where others will point the finger at me and blame me for their own dysfunction, fears and shame. i am carrying the sha...	WorkingThroughIt	8	528	Dec 11, 2013 by grateful2be
	something will change or I might not change... (Preview) I know I can change, I know I can change, I can change! I am praying on the situation I am having at my one & only meeting. I am not considering the fact that my tension is due to the fact that I have trouble w/ principles before personalities. I am human & feel hurt like humans do. I hope that maybe I ca...	Hoot Nanny	5	413	Dec 11, 2013 by grateful2be
	I Am Crazy! (Preview) I have lived with a high functioning alcoholic for over 10 years and only in the past 10 months have I really recognized the effics it has had on me. I was determined not to become co-dependent however I never understood the real meaning of co-dependancy. I am co-dependent! Last March my alcoholic husb...	Brighter Days	5	570	Dec 11, 2013 by Jerry F
	Nutso boss (Preview) I got a new job which may or may not be a good thing. Turns out my new boss seems to be having some serious emotional issues that unfortunately are spilling over into the workplace. I think I'm losing perspective about her behavior. I know I tend to have thin skin, something I've never been able to make...	cwya	11	269	Dec 10, 2013 by grateful2be
	First comes beer, then comes liquor, forever sicker. (Preview) It was only a matter of time. It started with the odoul's, moved into the beer, and is now I am certain..moved back into the liquor. I can't help but be sad. I mean I keep my head above the water and have fun at my business and bought some crafts to work on..but I wanted to cry on the drive home. Guess that's no...	sadsusie	4	460	Dec 10, 2013 by grateful2be
	The Spiritual Awakening... I Need & Deserve... (Preview) Happy Tues. Everyone... I Can't Say Mine has been Bad, but these Last Few Weeks have me Mentally & Physically Exhausted beyond words, and I Just can't put a Finger on Why? I had a Very Emotional Thanksgiving Week, I think just Missing My MIL who past Just Before the Holiday & My AFather , and Kn...	Jozie	3	503	Dec 10, 2013 by grateful2be
	Feeling vulnerable (Preview) I am rattled and not feeling so safe tonight. I know that the store where I worked alone this evening was being scoped out for a potential robbery...I felt it, I felt my fear, I was present to the danger and did not ignore it. I was planning out what to do all the while engaging the young man in a conversat...	PP	22	577	Dec 10, 2013 by Jen61
	update on being with A (Preview) Thanks for the support yesterday! It was interesting. The A got very angry several times. I only briefly felt scared or anxious. It left within minutes. It came up several times, and it left several times. This is amazing progress for me. I am much more in control of myself. THANK YOU ALANON! ...	Lyne	4	326	Dec 10, 2013 by grateful2be
	Olive branch or needy sucker? (Preview) Yesterday my SABF became really angry with me out of the blue. We were having a great day and then all of a sudden Mr. Hyde made an appearance. He wouldn't even speak to me. Personally I think he was looking for an excuse to go binge on chocolate ice cream...which he did. I didn't feel like playing into it so...	Nightingale	10	568	Dec 10, 2013 by PP
	I really don't want to stay away! (Preview) I really don't want to stay away anymore. I am afraid that this might be my only way of communicating w/ Al anon. I am trying to find a happy medium in dealing w/ others in the program. I feel shut-out at meetings & find myself hurt & not wanting to go back. I don't feel that I have the time necessary t...	Hoot Nanny	5	409	Dec 10, 2013 by abbyal
	stress after abortion (Preview) Hi MIP family, I have been away some time, ... the merry-go-round got me ...totally this time. I had become pregnant with my ex A. we have been through the 'honeymoon phase' after a violent episode. I feel like a fool coming to write here now, when I should have known better, already before. I wrote here a...	tortuga	29	3905	Dec 10, 2013 by Tasha
	Helping the abuse victim that joins us... (Preview) I was asked in a PM why we don't use more forceful measures, stronger words, etc. To get an abused person to open their eyes, run to face to face meetings, subject them to shaming or guilt riddled statements or opinions about how it might be effecting children under the roof, etc. I replied and wanted to...	John	15	683	Dec 10, 2013 by grateful2be
	another car wrecked, and my response should be? (Preview) Before I realized that my daughter was an A, back when I believed that everyone else had a problem/was telling lies about her/that she really would pay me back/that it would all be my fault if i didnt help her, etc, I thought it just odd that she had so many car accidents (mostly scrapes along the sides, bu...	lgnutah	7	353	Dec 10, 2013 by LeenieBeanie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.