Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

hopes314 · hopes314

I wish I could drive by a landfill and throw all my anger out. I know that landfill would be filled to the brim. My anger was so misguided yesterday. I seemed to be mad about everything in life. I definitely was not happy. Usually I can get mad and move on but this stuck to me. I know where the anger is from whi...

SpiderArcana · SpiderArcana

I told my AH that (after an entire day of the silent treatment) I was going to my parent's house for a few days. He asked that I come home and we talk. I said fine. I know what's going to happen. He's going to promise to change, to stop drinking, to do anything I want, to change for me. And that's not enough...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Several years ago, I learned that a certain tribe in a small village in Africa would deal with the offenses of a villager by placing the offending person in a circle. The entire tribe would circle the person whose offenses were of grave concern to them. Then, each villager would take a turn telling th...

grateful2be · grateful2be

One of the things I've learned as a longtime program member of Al-Anon is how uncomfortable I can be over somebody else's denial. I have learned to let a person be where they are for the most part although sometimes I might slip up. I truly don't know what kind of harm I can do to another if I try to rip off t...

texasgal · texasgal

On Monday I set a boundary with my husband.I no longer live at home I got my own apt. The last bill at our home with my name was the light bill. It was $200 and if he didnt pay by Monday it was going to be disconnected. He told me he could not pay it. So i told him to get a prepay electric company and switch it over to...

wornoutmrsfixit · wornoutmrsfixit

This song grabbed me from the first line. To me, it describes so clearly the feelings of having to walk away from someone you love but they are so "numb" they seem not to understand or even care what they've done. After boo hooing through the Carrie Underwood song that someone posted earlier...

Tricia911 · Tricia911

After copious reading on Surrender I have come to believe that it is a step process, not a not there one moment and there the next. I have now come to believe that what I thought was my surrender was merely compliance. I was doing all the right things. But, until my conscious and unconscious linked...

padodi · padodi

This is my very first time on here or any other message board. I am at the end of my rope and just googled "I hate alcohol" and came to this site. I have never been to al-anon, but after reading some of these posts, I plan to now! Until then, I have a question for all of you pros. My adult daughter is a...

Grace7 · Grace7

Its been 2 months since Dad died. I sat down with the mounds of paper work, which I've been chipping away at. When I filed his poa, the tears came. I've spent so many years taking care of him, making sure he is provided for as age crept up and visited his mind. I worked ever so diligently to maintain his d...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Time to move on after the apology from my mom is totally accepted. I think she is bringing me back into her world again. I am just so glad that I will probably be in the know from now on. She is still going to be in the doghouse if she pulls one of those again. I am so grateful for this program that I have so many fr...

el-cee · el-cee

....how, way back in time those founders got this together. I mean this philosophy is based many different philosophies. I don't know them all but I have read quotes from Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity, many ancient philosophers and general wise folks like Abraham Lincoln. What kind of educat...

tortuga · tortuga

I read that poster today by coincidence: 'I guess the moment everything changed was when I realized I deserved so much better.' and it just clicked. I hav spend the past 2 months away from A, and lived back in my 'original' environment. Many moments of peace came over me, as well as many moments of grie...

Venera · Venera

Just wanted to share.. I was feeling sad and angry for some reasons and I prayed to God from my heart and asked for help. Just asked to guide me and show me how to go thru it in any kind of way... and when i got into the car a song was starting and I just had a feeling it was my answer, don't know why... there was the...

Tasha · Tasha

I feel like the process is sort of like wading into chilly water. I take it really slow... sometimes I stop and let myself warm up to it a bit. I sometimes walk back out. Sometimes I just dive in : ) When you take a peek at something fragile and delicate, it's okay to just gently set it back on the shelf to l...

sadsusie · sadsusie

We got into a nice big fight. I know that it stems from me not keeping myself in recovery. I am just so friggin tired of not being normal. I am tired of fighting this crap, this crap feeling. tired of trying so hard to feel better. I guess I gave up and got swept back out to sea. It was that time for me and I was a...

el-cee · el-cee

I read the Courage to Change, One Day at a Time and more recently Hope for Today. They teach and reinforce the philosophy of Alanon and they help me try hard to live it everyday. They all seem to have their own purpose. The ODAT is brilliant, even if a bit old fashioned, full of wisdom. The Courage to Change...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I'm in the kitchen making dinner and I'm washing my hands. I just thought how grateful I am to have so much water, lights, heat and AC, a roof over my head and a job to go to. I take so much for granted and for some reason all this came to me now how grateful I am to have such a good life. I've always had it just fo...

SpiderArcana · SpiderArcana

I would probably be mad as well. He says he feels like a prisoner in his own house, that I constantly throw his drinking in his face, and that I don't think he can take care of himself or do what is best for him. He's totally right, I don't. And I don't know if he'll ever earn that trust and respect back from m...

messedupgirl · messedupgirl

hello everyone just new to the group wanted to say Thank You to those who have helped me and welcomed me in the chat room this morning, i will be back to share my story , i need help to pull me through a lot , messedupgirl is what I am , but can see so much help here, i will be strong and I will pull through , just bar...

Tasha · Tasha

Tracy · Tracy

Would love to hear your thoughts on EGO, I am confused, I know I never loved myself before recovery and al anon, I had low self worth. Today I know I matter and I am learning self care. However although I had low self worth I was confident in my abilities I liked to take control run the show. I think alcohol...

Wisdom67 · Wisdom67

Ok I'm in a state of confusion and this is real. I'm starting to question how far I should stay on my side of the street . I been very good up stair minding my own self I started to read step 1 again because some of me are not getting it right. I forgot my serenity pray . I do have great gaps of memory loss . I see my t...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I was thinking about the lessons of the last week .. there have been many. I'm just trying to keep doing the next right thing. It's not always easy and I'm trying to do things on my own which is good just hard at times. I'm still in toddler mode running before I can walk kind of deal. I really want to run an...

Saleschic721 · Saleschic721

I am new to this board and grateful that it is here. My alcoholic boyfriend and I broke up in early January after a year and a half together...most of which we lived together. He is a daily drinker of moderately expensive red wine. He starts drinking pinot noir upon waking in the morning and doesn't s...

kat42 · kat42

I am having such a hard time with this... this past Sept my AH driving blasted at 6 pm and me crying on the phone as I was trying to figure out where he was pushed is to a different point in things. I started going to al anon immediately when I avoided it like the plague for the years before. He started to go to A...

oldergal · oldergal

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the King's' wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it.. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did an...

Jen61 · Jen61

I think I finally get it with detachment. It has taken me a long time but hopefully I am close. I like to go on YouTube.com and type in alcoholism, denial of alcoholism, stories of alcoholics, treatments, etc. I find a lot of valuable information doing this. I was on YouTube for a couple of hours yest...

Jerry F · Jerry F

or the compulsion to cry over it. I've mentioned that my eldest son has relapsed and its been a while since. Denial and the tricks which come with it have kept it under the rug until the problem became too large and the rug too small. The entire family...including my wife and I are invloved. My wife...

hopes314 · hopes314

I have been going to alnon since March. I have been growing everyday from the experience. I am having a hard time with trust. I do not trust my aa at all. He stopped drinking in Nov, but really I don't know since he moved out of state to his new job. How can have a relationship without trust. I am trying to re...

el-cee · el-cee

I have been thinking about how Alanon works. Is it possible to recover without face to face meetings? Are these on line facilities enough? Are they add ons, or supplementary?

Raven Juniper · Raven Juniper

I'm curious as to how many of the fine people on here experience feelings of rejection (real or imagined) and how you've dealt or deal with it. I seem to be better at dealing with anger than my negative self-talk and perceptions. Sometimes I even start feeling rejected here...and then I wonder where th...

frustratedteengirl · frustratedteengirl

Hi there, I have an alcoholic mother and after recently visiting home I have been struggling with the deteriorating situation and was wondering if anyone on here went to the Inverness al-anon group at new craigs on saturday? Do I need to call up in advance or just turn up? Kind Regards ...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am so sorry to have to post this. My mom is not telling me things I think I would like to know before she does them. Is it too much to ask? She started w/ not telling me that she was sending her car down to CA where my relatives are for my niece. I knew that she was going to do it but I had to find out on FB the day it wa...

frustratedteengirl · frustratedteengirl

Well, this forum is very new to me and I'm not sure what I'm doing, so please bear with me xx I am a 17 yr old girl and my mother is an alcoholic. Now, this may seem horrendous since she has medical issues, and I am supposed to be caring, but.... I hold so much resentment against her, I couldn't care less if she d...

Pipi · Pipi

Hello everyone, I'm new to this forum, not to the subject. My bf is with the AA for the 8th month. We've got ups and downs. He's got his moods - before drinking, during drinking, now... emotions.. they affect our relationship the most. It may be rooted in his childhood, the insecurity, low or no self-est...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Hi all. As you know, I went to be with my Dad and got stranded in a motel room for more than a week. Yesterday, I was struggling with anxiety because the weather report for today and beyond it was more snow and blowing and drifting snow. Today, I awakened, did what I normally do for my program work, watch...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Want to keep this simple. The man I consider a friend became more as you know. Then things changed in his life so he could not continue our plans to meet and hopefully be a couple. I shared my pain here. You guys were real and told me the raw hurting truths. I know now I should have said ok sounds great, but go a...

breamanic665 · breamanic665

So after so many manipulations, I caved and answered the phone when my ex ABF called. (Via text) First it was poor me, and my absent father called me today. Then when that didnt work it was anger! Im coming for my bed! Then when that didnt work it was overly concerned for my safety time... and finally I answ...

Miamamamia · Miamamamia

I watch the clock and wonder what will it be tonight? Dinner is ready, the house is clean, things are put away, Ohhh shoot it's 4:30 and the back deck and driveway have not been shoveled, I throw his coat on, boots and mittens, I know I don't have time to do it all but if I get a good part of the deck done at least...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t56556147/alanon-step-11/

tsuthe1 · tsuthe1

Thanks everyone for responding during this time. Whats hard about all this is the trust is gone. How do you ever build that again? Now he's going to AA meetings, said he was sorry. Even is recognizing he needs treatment. But what really pisses me off, is this is all about HIM. And what he needs. Never mi...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Yesterday I had an urge to go to the open AA meeting I do attend and really enjoy. It's at 7am, so being there is a choice especially when the weather is the way it has been in the recent weeks there is nothing like 32 degrees feeling like a heat wave!! LOL .. it won't last and that's ok .. still .. it was somet...

hopes314 · hopes314

I feel so tiny against this disease. i don't know how to be me anymore. It seems like I am to change so i don't step on the alcoholic toes. I feel so lost. I know this is what I feel in the moment. i do have a sponsor that has helped me so long. It took months to get pass denial. I go to meetings and I want to...

Wisdom67 · Wisdom67

Hello I'm just checking in I'm hoping to attend a meeting tonight I need some positive energy . My depresstion has lighten up a bit. I took time off of reading Alaon books and just searching for me. I was hoping after 4 months of no insurance and no medication things woukd get better it seams things take a t...

tsuthe1 · tsuthe1

I am new to this. Just found my husbands stash hes been hiding for over 2 years. Tons of vodka, beer and even a porn video. I;m devastated. We have been married for almost 26 years coming May. I am beyond angry, and deeply saddened. Feel as if 1/2 my life has been a phasod. I;m numb.Cant feel my hands. I moved...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Very excited today I apply for the job I'm currently working, everyone is glad I am back. The hours would be really great it will open some other opportunities for me in terms of trying school again now that it's not so crazy. So wish me luck .. interview is today! I have court Thursday .. oh the joys of m...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Hello, all. My Dad was transferred from the hospital to a skilled nursing facility on Wednesday - not far from the pile up on the interstate on Thursday. Due to continued snowdrifts, visibility, ice and snow covered roads and the urging of law enforcement to stay off the roads - plus the long distan...

Akavanagh · Akavanagh

And I'm still needing some answers, help, anything. I'm planning on going to more meetings because i feel they can really help me, but for now, i would like to hear from some veterans on some advice to get me through the week. Some background info is, I was with my boyfriend for 2 years, we broke up for a ye...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

AH got some bad news today and I worry that it will be the trigger or excuse for him to drink again. He is so sad, and it breaks my heart to see him this way. Unlike past situations though, I am keeping the focus on me, being supportive but not controlling, taking care of my needs first. Please keep us both in y...

imom · imom

So after years of living with his addiction, it was a year ago that I filed for divorce. It turned out that was his rock bottom because he finally got clean and sober so he wouldn't lose his family. We separated for about 6 or seven months and he was homeless when he wasn't in rehab. Anyway, I ended up taki...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning Everyone Yesterday was a down day for me. So down I was at a point I was thinking I just didn't want to live. I am tired of my life. I'm OK today at least. Why am I thinking like this I do not know. I'm not suicidal but I sometimes just feel like I'm so tired I just want it to go away. I know I nee...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am going to make this quick really I am! My cousin was in a hospital for a week. You all might figure out what kind of hospital. She finally after the week was past she told me where she was & that she wasn't in just any hospital. I am feeling better. I figure it must have been the molasses. It was in my sys...

Miamamamia · Miamamamia

So confused !! So here I am almost a week with you guys and a bit more with my f2f meetings, I find this site very uplifting, and have met and had some great conversations in the chat room, however I am still so lost as to finding out if I am in the right place, I'm not happy, I have not been happy for years, live i...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I don't know about you but I've been feeling very disheartened lately. My efforts in finding a second job over the past four months feel in vain - not one call back. The financial fallout from the divorce is forcing me to file bankruptcy this year - very disappointing. My efforts in finding a roommat...

mercedes1959 · mercedes1959

Thank you John for coming in and chairing. Robin ks

Beatrice · Beatrice

Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. If you aren't being treated with Love and Respect, check your price tag. Maybe you marked yourself down. Get off the clearance rack and get behind the glass where they keep the valuables !...

bethinks · bethinks

Hi! My 71 year old Mom has been married to her 70 year old husband for 11 years. During this 11 years she has kicked him out 4 different times, each time telling my sister and I that she is done with his drinking. Two times she has kicked him out were after 2 very serious health issues, when he would never b...

Kerrymom · Kerrymom

Does anyone have experience with custody issues when the alcoholic hasn't had any public consequences (DUI, etc). we have two young children, one just a few months old, I can't trust him now with the kids and am scared joint custody will be enforced. With no "proof" it would be just my word...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I don't mean to be this way but I feel so sick I feel like I am going to puke! I ate some molasses straight up & ended up getting sick. I take it for arthritis. It seems to help but is it possible that I got a bad bottle? I am trying everything to get rid of the feeling that I have acid reflux or something! I may...

Sooverit · Sooverit

I am looking for any shred of hope that my husband can stop. I have gotten the wheels in motion to kick him out but i wonder if there's any chance in hell he will really stop this time. Tomorrow is my birthday, he asked what I wanted. I want him to stop drinking and get help. He said he wouldn't ask me for someth...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I need a place for all this anger. (Preview) I wish I could drive by a landfill and throw all my anger out. I know that landfill would be filled to the brim. My anger was so misguided yesterday. I seemed to be mad about everything in life. I definitely was not happy. Usually I can get mad and move on but this stuck to me. I know where the anger is from whi...	hopes314	17	652	Feb 5, 2014 by MeTwo2
	Talking tonight (Preview) I told my AH that (after an entire day of the silent treatment) I was going to my parent's house for a few days. He asked that I come home and we talk. I said fine. I know what's going to happen. He's going to promise to change, to stop drinking, to do anything I want, to change for me. And that's not enough...	SpiderArcana	21	761	Feb 5, 2014 by jillybean1
	A tribal custom for healing (Preview) Several years ago, I learned that a certain tribe in a small village in Africa would deal with the offenses of a villager by placing the offending person in a circle. The entire tribe would circle the person whose offenses were of grave concern to them. Then, each villager would take a turn telling th...	grateful2be	7	495	Feb 5, 2014 by MeTwo2
	Other people's defenses, Blanche and me (Preview) One of the things I've learned as a longtime program member of Al-Anon is how uncomfortable I can be over somebody else's denial. I have learned to let a person be where they are for the most part although sometimes I might slip up. I truly don't know what kind of harm I can do to another if I try to rip off t...	grateful2be	19	609	Feb 5, 2014 by grateful2be
	setting boundaries (Preview) On Monday I set a boundary with my husband.I no longer live at home I got my own apt. The last bill at our home with my name was the light bill. It was $200 and if he didnt pay by Monday it was going to be disconnected. He told me he could not pay it. So i told him to get a prepay electric company and switch it over to...	texasgal	16	441	Feb 5, 2014 by grateful2be
	Powerful Song (Preview) This song grabbed me from the first line. To me, it describes so clearly the feelings of having to walk away from someone you love but they are so "numb" they seem not to understand or even care what they've done. After boo hooing through the Carrie Underwood song that someone posted earlier...	wornoutmrsfixit	2	346	Feb 5, 2014 by wornoutmrsfixit
	Surrender - Random thoughts on (Preview) After copious reading on Surrender I have come to believe that it is a step process, not a not there one moment and there the next. I have now come to believe that what I thought was my surrender was merely compliance. I was doing all the right things. But, until my conscious and unconscious linked...	Tricia911	6	1689	Feb 5, 2014 by Tricia911
	Needing advice-very new (Preview) This is my very first time on here or any other message board. I am at the end of my rope and just googled "I hate alcohol" and came to this site. I have never been to al-anon, but after reading some of these posts, I plan to now! Until then, I have a question for all of you pros. My adult daughter is a...	padodi	13	623	Feb 4, 2014 by maryjane
	Will Grief Abate and Probs it causes...I think? (Preview) Its been 2 months since Dad died. I sat down with the mounds of paper work, which I've been chipping away at. When I filed his poa, the tears came. I've spent so many years taking care of him, making sure he is provided for as age crept up and visited his mind. I worked ever so diligently to maintain his d...	Grace7	3	388	Feb 4, 2014 by Grace7
	apology accepted; reconciliation. (Preview) Time to move on after the apology from my mom is totally accepted. I think she is bringing me back into her world again. I am just so glad that I will probably be in the know from now on. She is still going to be in the doghouse if she pulls one of those again. I am so grateful for this program that I have so many fr...	Hoot Nanny	2	321	Feb 4, 2014 by hotrod
	Have you ever wondered... (Preview) ....how, way back in time those founders got this together. I mean this philosophy is based many different philosophies. I don't know them all but I have read quotes from Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity, many ancient philosophers and general wise folks like Abraham Lincoln. What kind of educat...	el-cee	5	403	Feb 4, 2014 by ParisMemories
	work in progress! (Preview) I read that poster today by coincidence: 'I guess the moment everything changed was when I realized I deserved so much better.' and it just clicked. I hav spend the past 2 months away from A, and lived back in my 'original' environment. Many moments of peace came over me, as well as many moments of grie...	tortuga	7	489	Feb 4, 2014 by tortuga
	WOW.. Live like you were dying song (Preview) Just wanted to share.. I was feeling sad and angry for some reasons and I prayed to God from my heart and asked for help. Just asked to guide me and show me how to go thru it in any kind of way... and when i got into the car a song was starting and I just had a feeling it was my answer, don't know why... there was the...	Venera	7	482	Feb 4, 2014 by Debilyn
	A New Freedom! (Preview) I feel like the process is sort of like wading into chilly water. I take it really slow... sometimes I stop and let myself warm up to it a bit. I sometimes walk back out. Sometimes I just dive in : ) When you take a peek at something fragile and delicate, it's okay to just gently set it back on the shelf to l...	Tasha	6	327	Feb 3, 2014 by Jerry F
	Too exhausted to be anything but a ball of sadness (Preview) We got into a nice big fight. I know that it stems from me not keeping myself in recovery. I am just so friggin tired of not being normal. I am tired of fighting this crap, this crap feeling. tired of trying so hard to feel better. I guess I gave up and got swept back out to sea. It was that time for me and I was a...	sadsusie	12	490	Feb 3, 2014 by sfmom
	The Power of the Daily Reader!!! (Preview) I read the Courage to Change, One Day at a Time and more recently Hope for Today. They teach and reinforce the philosophy of Alanon and they help me try hard to live it everyday. They all seem to have their own purpose. The ODAT is brilliant, even if a bit old fashioned, full of wisdom. The Courage to Change...	el-cee	11	687	Feb 3, 2014 by el-cee
	Making Dinner and be Grateful (Preview) I'm in the kitchen making dinner and I'm washing my hands. I just thought how grateful I am to have so much water, lights, heat and AC, a roof over my head and a job to go to. I take so much for granted and for some reason all this came to me now how grateful I am to have such a good life. I've always had it just fo...	Cathyinaz	9	435	Feb 3, 2014 by hopes314
	He's mad because I don't trust him (still) (Preview) I would probably be mad as well. He says he feels like a prisoner in his own house, that I constantly throw his drinking in his face, and that I don't think he can take care of himself or do what is best for him. He's totally right, I don't. And I don't know if he'll ever earn that trust and respect back from m...	SpiderArcana	8	730	Feb 3, 2014 by hopes314
	New here (Preview) hello everyone just new to the group wanted to say Thank You to those who have helped me and welcomed me in the chat room this morning, i will be back to share my story , i need help to pull me through a lot , messedupgirl is what I am , but can see so much help here, i will be strong and I will pull through , just bar...	messedupgirl	8	479	Feb 2, 2014 by cwya
	Never give up on you (Preview)	Tasha	6	428	Feb 2, 2014 by hopes314
	EGO (Preview) Would love to hear your thoughts on EGO, I am confused, I know I never loved myself before recovery and al anon, I had low self worth. Today I know I matter and I am learning self care. However although I had low self worth I was confident in my abilities I liked to take control run the show. I think alcohol...	Tracy	6	1373	Feb 2, 2014 by hopes314
	Feeling not sure (Preview) Ok I'm in a state of confusion and this is real. I'm starting to question how far I should stay on my side of the street . I been very good up stair minding my own self I started to read step 1 again because some of me are not getting it right. I forgot my serenity pray . I do have great gaps of memory loss . I see my t...	Wisdom67	5	431	Feb 2, 2014 by yanksfan51
	Weekly update :) (Preview) I was thinking about the lessons of the last week .. there have been many. I'm just trying to keep doing the next right thing. It's not always easy and I'm trying to do things on my own which is good just hard at times. I'm still in toddler mode running before I can walk kind of deal. I really want to run an...	SerenityRUS	2	345	Feb 2, 2014 by hotrod
	Letting go (Preview) I am new to this board and grateful that it is here. My alcoholic boyfriend and I broke up in early January after a year and a half together...most of which we lived together. He is a daily drinker of moderately expensive red wine. He starts drinking pinot noir upon waking in the morning and doesn't s...	Saleschic721	9	530	Feb 2, 2014 by neshema2
	Detaching with love... (Preview) I am having such a hard time with this... this past Sept my AH driving blasted at 6 pm and me crying on the phone as I was trying to figure out where he was pushed is to a different point in things. I started going to al anon immediately when I avoided it like the plague for the years before. He started to go to A...	kat42	7	663	Feb 2, 2014 by neshema2
	2 Storys (Preview) In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the King's' wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it.. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did an...	oldergal	3	353	Feb 2, 2014 by el-cee
	Detachment (Preview) I think I finally get it with detachment. It has taken me a long time but hopefully I am close. I like to go on YouTube.com and type in alcoholism, denial of alcoholism, stories of alcoholics, treatments, etc. I find a lot of valuable information doing this. I was on YouTube for a couple of hours yest...	Jen61	9	586	Feb 2, 2014 by neshema2
	There's no denying the sadness (Preview) or the compulsion to cry over it. I've mentioned that my eldest son has relapsed and its been a while since. Denial and the tricks which come with it have kept it under the rug until the problem became too large and the rug too small. The entire family...including my wife and I are invloved. My wife...	Jerry F	17	922	Feb 1, 2014 by Rose50
	i keep getting sucked back in (Preview) I have been going to alnon since March. I have been growing everyday from the experience. I am having a hard time with trust. I do not trust my aa at all. He stopped drinking in Nov, but really I don't know since he moved out of state to his new job. How can have a relationship without trust. I am trying to re...	hopes314	9	567	Feb 1, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Can you work this recovery program without face to face meetings? (Preview) I have been thinking about how Alanon works. Is it possible to recover without face to face meetings? Are these on line facilities enough? Are they add ons, or supplementary?	el-cee	22	649	Feb 1, 2014 by Tricia911
	Dealing with rejection...ESH? (Preview) I'm curious as to how many of the fine people on here experience feelings of rejection (real or imagined) and how you've dealt or deal with it. I seem to be better at dealing with anger than my negative self-talk and perceptions. Sometimes I even start feeling rejected here...and then I wonder where th...	Raven Juniper	14	4081	Feb 1, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Group in Inverness? (Preview) Hi there, I have an alcoholic mother and after recently visiting home I have been struggling with the deteriorating situation and was wondering if anyone on here went to the Inverness al-anon group at new craigs on saturday? Do I need to call up in advance or just turn up? Kind Regards ...	frustratedteengirl	13	998	Feb 1, 2014 by Breakingfree
	why is she not telling me? (Preview) I am so sorry to have to post this. My mom is not telling me things I think I would like to know before she does them. Is it too much to ask? She started w/ not telling me that she was sending her car down to CA where my relatives are for my niece. I knew that she was going to do it but I had to find out on FB the day it wa...	Hoot Nanny	4	490	Feb 1, 2014 by el-cee
	My mother. (Preview) Well, this forum is very new to me and I'm not sure what I'm doing, so please bear with me xx I am a 17 yr old girl and my mother is an alcoholic. Now, this may seem horrendous since she has medical issues, and I am supposed to be caring, but.... I hold so much resentment against her, I couldn't care less if she d...	frustratedteengirl	12	604	Feb 1, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Way out of a circle? (Preview) Hello everyone, I'm new to this forum, not to the subject. My bf is with the AA for the 8th month. We've got ups and downs. He's got his moods - before drinking, during drinking, now... emotions.. they affect our relationship the most. It may be rooted in his childhood, the insecurity, low or no self-est...	Pipi	8	483	Feb 1, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	My HP and Home (Preview) Hi all. As you know, I went to be with my Dad and got stranded in a motel room for more than a week. Yesterday, I was struggling with anxiety because the weather report for today and beyond it was more snow and blowing and drifting snow. Today, I awakened, did what I normally do for my program work, watch...	grateful2be	14	401	Feb 1, 2014 by grateful2be
	somethings changed and sorta hurts. (Preview) Want to keep this simple. The man I consider a friend became more as you know. Then things changed in his life so he could not continue our plans to meet and hopefully be a couple. I shared my pain here. You guys were real and told me the raw hurting truths. I know now I should have said ok sounds great, but go a...	Debilyn	25	850	Jan 31, 2014 by Ness
	Story Time! A car battery (Preview) So after so many manipulations, I caved and answered the phone when my ex ABF called. (Via text) First it was poor me, and my absent father called me today. Then when that didnt work it was anger! Im coming for my bed! Then when that didnt work it was overly concerned for my safety time... and finally I answ...	breamanic665	6	417	Jan 31, 2014 by breamanic665
	5pm comes to quick !!! (Preview) I watch the clock and wonder what will it be tonight? Dinner is ready, the house is clean, things are put away, Ohhh shoot it's 4:30 and the back deck and driveway have not been shoveled, I throw his coat on, boots and mittens, I know I don't have time to do it all but if I get a good part of the deck done at least...	Miamamamia	7	564	Jan 30, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Step 11 (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t56556147/alanon-step-11/	hotrod	0	379	Jan 30, 2014 by hotrod
	re: Al-a non meetings (Preview) Thanks everyone for responding during this time. Whats hard about all this is the trust is gone. How do you ever build that again? Now he's going to AA meetings, said he was sorry. Even is recognizing he needs treatment. But what really pisses me off, is this is all about HIM. And what he needs. Never mi...	tsuthe1	9	625	Jan 30, 2014 by abbyal
	Being where I am suppose to be .. (Preview) Yesterday I had an urge to go to the open AA meeting I do attend and really enjoy. It's at 7am, so being there is a choice especially when the weather is the way it has been in the recent weeks there is nothing like 32 degrees feeling like a heat wave!! LOL .. it won't last and that's ok .. still .. it was somet...	SerenityRUS	9	502	Jan 30, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Please share some wisdom (Preview) I feel so tiny against this disease. i don't know how to be me anymore. It seems like I am to change so i don't step on the alcoholic toes. I feel so lost. I know this is what I feel in the moment. i do have a sponsor that has helped me so long. It took months to get pass denial. I go to meetings and I want to...	hopes314	5	470	Jan 29, 2014 by tiredtonite
	Check in (Preview) Hello I'm just checking in I'm hoping to attend a meeting tonight I need some positive energy . My depresstion has lighten up a bit. I took time off of reading Alaon books and just searching for me. I was hoping after 4 months of no insurance and no medication things woukd get better it seams things take a t...	Wisdom67	5	281	Jan 29, 2014 by Jerry F
	RE: IS HE AN AGENT- LIKE 007? (Preview) I am new to this. Just found my husbands stash hes been hiding for over 2 years. Tons of vodka, beer and even a porn video. I;m devastated. We have been married for almost 26 years coming May. I am beyond angry, and deeply saddened. Feel as if 1/2 my life has been a phasod. I;m numb.Cant feel my hands. I moved...	tsuthe1	9	723	Jan 29, 2014 by barbaralewis
	Hurry up and wait! (Preview) Very excited today I apply for the job I'm currently working, everyone is glad I am back. The hours would be really great it will open some other opportunities for me in terms of trying school again now that it's not so crazy. So wish me luck .. interview is today! I have court Thursday .. oh the joys of m...	SerenityRUS	15	443	Jan 29, 2014 by Jerry F
	Being Hemmed in - A Hockey Team - Liquor abounds (Preview) Hello, all. My Dad was transferred from the hospital to a skilled nursing facility on Wednesday - not far from the pile up on the interstate on Thursday. Due to continued snowdrifts, visibility, ice and snow covered roads and the urging of law enforcement to stay off the roads - plus the long distan...	grateful2be	17	3446	Jan 29, 2014 by grateful2be
	Went to my first meeting tonight and am a newcomer here... (Preview) And I'm still needing some answers, help, anything. I'm planning on going to more meetings because i feel they can really help me, but for now, i would like to hear from some veterans on some advice to get me through the week. Some background info is, I was with my boyfriend for 2 years, we broke up for a ye...	Akavanagh	8	372	Jan 29, 2014 by mercedes1959
	Bad news today (Preview) AH got some bad news today and I worry that it will be the trigger or excuse for him to drink again. He is so sad, and it breaks my heart to see him this way. Unlike past situations though, I am keeping the focus on me, being supportive but not controlling, taking care of my needs first. Please keep us both in y...	ParisMemories	13	561	Jan 29, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	GUILT!!! (Preview) So after years of living with his addiction, it was a year ago that I filed for divorce. It turned out that was his rock bottom because he finally got clean and sober so he wouldn't lose his family. We separated for about 6 or seven months and he was homeless when he wasn't in rehab. Anyway, I ended up taki...	imom	7	561	Jan 29, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Tired (Preview) Good Morning Everyone Yesterday was a down day for me. So down I was at a point I was thinking I just didn't want to live. I am tired of my life. I'm OK today at least. Why am I thinking like this I do not know. I'm not suicidal but I sometimes just feel like I'm so tired I just want it to go away. I know I nee...	Cathyinaz	19	651	Jan 29, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	update (Preview) I am going to make this quick really I am! My cousin was in a hospital for a week. You all might figure out what kind of hospital. She finally after the week was past she told me where she was & that she wasn't in just any hospital. I am feeling better. I figure it must have been the molasses. It was in my sys...	Hoot Nanny	2	319	Jan 29, 2014 by Miamamamia
	still so confuse (Preview) So confused !! So here I am almost a week with you guys and a bit more with my f2f meetings, I find this site very uplifting, and have met and had some great conversations in the chat room, however I am still so lost as to finding out if I am in the right place, I'm not happy, I have not been happy for years, live i...	Miamamamia	13	594	Jan 28, 2014 by Jerry F
	Maybe it's the winter doldrums (Preview) I don't know about you but I've been feeling very disheartened lately. My efforts in finding a second job over the past four months feel in vain - not one call back. The financial fallout from the divorce is forcing me to file bankruptcy this year - very disappointing. My efforts in finding a roommat...	abbyalana	6	613	Jan 28, 2014 by Jen61
	So sorry about the meeting last night, my computer went down right before I was to start chairing (Preview) Thank you John for coming in and chairing. Robin ks	mercedes1959	2	256	Jan 28, 2014 by mercedes1959
	Whats your price tag worth! (Preview) Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. If you aren't being treated with Love and Respect, check your price tag. Maybe you marked yourself down. Get off the clearance rack and get behind the glass where they keep the valuables !...	Beatrice	12	879	Jan 28, 2014 by karma13
	How to handle my Mom when she takes her drunk husband back for the fourth time. (Preview) Hi! My 71 year old Mom has been married to her 70 year old husband for 11 years. During this 11 years she has kicked him out 4 different times, each time telling my sister and I that she is done with his drinking. Two times she has kicked him out were after 2 very serious health issues, when he would never b...	bethinks	8	611	Jan 28, 2014 by kerthinks
	Sharing custody with AH.... (Preview) Does anyone have experience with custody issues when the alcoholic hasn't had any public consequences (DUI, etc). we have two young children, one just a few months old, I can't trust him now with the kids and am scared joint custody will be enforced. With no "proof" it would be just my word...	Kerrymom	6	549	Jan 28, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	bad molasses; sick to my stomach; will it last? (Preview) I don't mean to be this way but I feel so sick I feel like I am going to puke! I ate some molasses straight up & ended up getting sick. I take it for arthritis. It seems to help but is it possible that I got a bad bottle? I am trying everything to get rid of the feeling that I have acid reflux or something! I may...	Hoot Nanny	4	2019	Jan 27, 2014 by Miamamamia
	Does anyone ever get better? (Preview) I am looking for any shred of hope that my husband can stop. I have gotten the wheels in motion to kick him out but i wonder if there's any chance in hell he will really stop this time. Tomorrow is my birthday, he asked what I wanted. I want him to stop drinking and get help. He said he wouldn't ask me for someth...	Sooverit	15	809	Jan 27, 2014 by imom
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.