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New, Seeking and Kinda PO'd
(Preview)
I've been lurking here for a few weeks now. Also started back to attending meetings in my local area and recently got a sponsor with whom I am starting to do the steps. I'm reading a few of the daily readings and praying for my AW and also for guidance and direction. I'm what I have learned is called a "...
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PleaseGodNoMore
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14
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476
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What are your favorite spring and summer flowers and colors?
(Preview)
After a harsh winter, MG's avatar of a beautiful morning glory is a reminder to me of some of my favorite springtime and summer colors and flowers. These blue hydrangea are especially precious to me because blue hydrangea are challenging to grow and can appear silvery depending on the blue hues and l...
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grateful2be
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35
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1001
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I have to be kind to....me!! An update
(Preview)
I wanted to give an update. And mention something I was afraid to mention before. But I am tired of being afraid to talk about the horrible things I have dealt with these last few months. I can be subtle without mentioning details and I think it's ok to do this so I can start to heal. My AH and I were coworkers...
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Newlife girl
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4
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346
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My 3 daily readings today hit me so fresh and new it was amazing
(Preview)
After starting my day with my head in recovery. I had a counseling appointment that helped me to get balanced within regarding communicating my wants and needs to others. I went to the dentist and got a cleaning, worked out with a friend and I took my third final and got an A, I am happy right now. After s...
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Breakingfree
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5
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375
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If I hear he has control over drinking 1 more time!!!
(Preview)
Alone with thoughts is a bad place to be - thoughts on my marriage to my AH - if you can call it that. There is no touch between us , there is NO trust in him, can't remember the last time something kind was said to me, and I am so sad. Trying to focus on kids and me but with 2 young kids its hard to not be around AH too...
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Kerrymom
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8
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482
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i love the new avatars
(Preview)
just saying. . i love everyones new flowery springy avatars. they make me smile when i read posts from you all. spring is taking forever to arrive here in my northeast state so these photos are of what is to come. . soon i hope. btw, i would upload one myself but from my tablet i cant seem to make it work,lol ;...
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Theoceancalls
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6
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297
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Going Forward Odaat
(Preview)
Well I'm officially out of a job but not quite. My job will end during the summer. I did apply for another in my dept. but it's been offered to someone else. I don't know who got it. I'm disappointed. The job was for my boss' boss who has her head on straight and is one of the few left who is holding tight to...
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tiredtonite
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6
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310
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Scary Spring
(Preview)
Im feeling a bit anxious tonight, a bit on edge. I feel that one door has closed and another will inevitably open and its the fear of the unknown. What makes it worse is that where I live days last a long time in the spring and summer. During the winter when I felt this way the days ended quickly and in a way thi...
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el-cee
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16
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557
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Would it be wrong?
(Preview)
It scares me when my AH drives....would it be wrong of me to call in a DUI driver in hopes he would get help? He would expect him mom to pay an attorney . If he had court ordered meetings?? The health insurance I found for him will pay for 30 days at a facility in Palm springs they only cost to us is flight and ab...
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mamachief
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5
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452
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the world needs a group hug!
(Preview)
Yep the world needs a group hug! I am especially in need of one today. No big deals, though, I just need my daily hug. So, it seems that days like today are sometimes rare but they happen when we least expect it. I am so grateful for the sunshine when it comes up here. Today it is kinda dreary but we had loads of...
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Hoot Nanny
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8
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523
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Need your ESH
(Preview)
So, things with my AH are awful right now. Neither one of us is filing but I think one of us should just jump in and do it. We hate each other, there is no communication and he blames me because I don't like having conversations with him. He knows why, it's been made clear. He's been told how to find recov...
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ilovedogs
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17
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535
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Shaken up
(Preview)
I thought I had a handle on who were the alcoholics in my life. But I just had an experience that shook me up. I got a call from an old friend. He said he was coming through town tomorrow and he thought of me. I said, "Hey, let's get together!" This is a person I don't have any romantic history w...
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Mattie
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14
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563
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One up-man-ship - subtle violence
(Preview)
One of the things I appreciate on this board has to do with the lack of one up-man-ship that can often happen and does happen in some relationships and groups. Although I do see it on occasion - it is not the norm. Perhaps sharing our experience, strength and hope without correcting others or trying to...
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grateful2be
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14
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534
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Hope is not a strategy...
(Preview)
I just read these words and thought what a great thing to share.
"Remember that hope is not a strategy," she said. "Problems don't go away when you ignore them -- they get bigger."
It reminded me of the "elephant in the room"
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Truth
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7
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389
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Pregnant Scared & Running Away
(Preview)
4 months pregnant now. I got pregnant because doctors told me i could never have a child so this was unexpected, esp. now i'm in my late 30's. During a relapse at Christmas with the exAH. He couldn't stay sober for a whole month, even after he knew about the pregnancy. A few weeks ago I had to leave for a...
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abell
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8
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376
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400 Miles Today
(Preview)
Hi Everyone My day started about 4am this morning. Got up got dressed got coffee and out the door by 5am. Took the trek up the hill to my x's house. Picked up him and his wife and we headed north to Flagstaff, AZ. Found the facility that had my son's personal items, laptop, computers etc etc etc. Next I...
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Cathyinaz
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10
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397
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He's coming home and I'm okay.....
(Preview)
Well, my AH is now a RAH. He did 30 days inpatient and another 45 in an Intensive outpatient while living in a 1/2 way house. He has learned all about his illness and what it did to our family. He was far from home so all our communication was by phone for the last 2 months, he sounds good and I am thankful...
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jillybean1
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8
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416
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Turn of events and some explanation ..
(Preview)
Well now .. been an interesting turn of events today .. first thing first I got my headlight taken care of to the tune of 18$ thank goodness it's done! Got a few other things done I'm having to apply for aide for my power bill .. however .. it is what it is and if it's available .. I'm taking it. The other news...
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SerenityRUS
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6
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461
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job
(Preview)
I got the job!! :) I'm so excited and everything happened with such little effort and worry on my part. I know it was all my HP I am so very grateful. I move in a couple of months so I have time to look for apt and pack. I look at my life very differently today. My soon to be exAH is not in a good place and one of the la...
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texasgal
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12
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408
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More free hugs and warm fuzziness
(Preview)
I will be back on later tonight. it's been a busy tiring day. I wanted to share this with you all as a warm virtual hug, because I know we can all use a hug. I read your posts and sometimes I just don't have the words to express how deeply I empathize with you. So anyway, here is the hugs I promised! [video=h...
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Raven Juniper
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4
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245
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Story to share
(Preview)
Someone told me a story about As and how they bend the situation that I thought was too good to not share. She told me about a friend who was heavily pregnant, with an AH, who'd recently moved house. The house needed work, and with a new baby coming as well, they needed to paint and decorate. The pregnan...
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yankshirerose
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7
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493
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Just checkin in..
(Preview)
Hello my beautiful MIP family, I haven't been on for a while. I have been happily busy with my business so I have had a little/lot less free time to read and post. I want thank you all for you ongoing support through the hardest time of my life. I feel like I came to these boards a hopeless incoherent mess, w...
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sadsusie
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3
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380
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praying
(Preview)
My son got justice today. Im happy for him but the what ifs are alive and kicking. What if he gets back on the drink now? What if it all starts again and something else happens to him? Ive been praying all week for the right outcome and it happened so I think i will keep on praying for my son. It seems to work.x
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el-cee
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5
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244
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so tired but I still get a lot done!
(Preview)
Spent part of my morning at a funeral today. The lady we honored was a co-birthday person of mine. We were born on the same day many years apart. I was surprise because I didn't read her obituary fully. I read it on the program. Anyhow, she was a friend of my mom's as well. And as you know, my mom is in a mental f...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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255
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Keeping it simple
(Preview)
My mind was quieter today and I was feeling more accepting of the situation in general. I mean what am I going to do, battle the windmills in my brain? Then the A just went and made things so much easier today. He had started ramping up his cycling again and it looks like he burned his last bridge with the lit...
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Raven Juniper
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3
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313
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need help with trigger management
(Preview)
Hi MIP family. I'm sorry I've been absent for a while- juggling so many things and trying not to drop anything... but pretty much just feeling super vulnerable and trying to throw a root down somewhere. I'm up late tonight, bothered by a trigger. Actually, it's a continuation of a trigger from las...
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bud
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9
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364
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Today is A very hard day
(Preview)
I can not help but feel resposible for my husband arrest . I was not feeling safe I left my house to go to a hotel no one new about. I was only going for the day to get my head cleared pray to my higher power for help . I was feeling unsure weather to bite the bullet and take my AH back home. Until he followed me to an...
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Wisdom67
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19
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1030
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Lying while in recovery....How should I react?
(Preview)
My fiance' is 3 months sober after 5 years of binge drinking practically every day. While he was drinking, he was a compulsive liar. I was constantly catching him in lies that he told while drinking or about his drinking. Whether it was a big lie or a small lie, I couldn't trust a single thing he said. He wa...
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Megan_E
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23
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1149
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KMMS .. Oi!
(Preview)
Keeping My Mouth Shut .. Ohhhhhh myyyy is about all I can say at the moment. I need to take a BIG breath. Apparently my STBAX must have heard from his atty and must have been raked over the coals about more than a few things. Probably about paying the bills he just doesn't need to pay .. LOL .. I'm sure his a...
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SerenityRUS
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12
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365
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Wondering how to cope.
(Preview)
I have been dealing with this disease for 12 years now. Lots of pain the mistrust. Now I am retired and my husbanc is retiring in 2 days and I am wondering if I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I have no faith in him. My trust is shattered and I dont know if I can be happy living like this. He says he...
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Jujubean
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5
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540
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Just finished reading Getting Them Sober
(Preview)
Even though it is a small book I have taken my time in reading it. I see myself in almost every page. I do think, for me, that this will be a book I can read again and again when I "slip" and say more than I should. I want to get healthy for me. I don't want to have that horrible feeling in the pit of...
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Jen61
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9
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699
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Love These Days
(Preview)
I am so happy today. I love the days when the sun is shining. I get one task done and my son has an excellent day at daycare.  Sending all the new found Al-anon Family love and support today ......
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Truth
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2
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264
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Need to be brave and get info....
(Preview)
Just had knee surgery. Its been hurting a year or more. Then the darn DVT started up again. (blood clots blocking veins) so that means meds injections done by me and oral meds. its NO stress. I say no even more now. am ok no energy or very little. do one thing at a time. allow me to do some work outside for jus...
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Debilyn
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6
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444
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Back to the other behavior.
(Preview)
So today at about 11am. Jekyll was gone and Hyde was back. Normal emails and communication. I like Hyde much easier to deal with. One more week and then freedom for a month.
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Truth
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4
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262
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Being productive ..
(Preview)
Being productive is usually more along the lines of how to procrastinate and other not so healthy behaviors .. it's definitely something I'm working on because honestly .. I have used this on going legal battle to not face some of what I need to deal with .. kind of like dealing with the qualifier in my li...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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391
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The waiting is the hardest part
(Preview)
The past two days... Talk about a roller coaster. I'm posting from my phone so I hope this is semi coherent lol. So I had a great couple of days with experiencing some more breakthroughs in some difficult areas. I know I've received some potent blessings lately too:) but yesterday I sort of experienced...
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Raven Juniper
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7
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521
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another reason to be grateful
(Preview)
A new difficulty has arisen. I have been waiting on it and its here. My son was at court to testify against the man who assaulted him last year. So, ive been supporting him. Hes been up to high dough, really anxious and has been kept waiting for 2 days to testify. Today he did and he was so relieved. That, all...
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el-cee
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7
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387
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He has started it again....
(Preview)
He is denying the abuse and pretending he is the agreeable one. I did react however, I set boundaries. I restated my boundary to him "if he continues to deny the abuse and harassment, I will have to report him to the police. " He tried to say the stories are made up again. He is pretending he is ag...
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Truth
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23
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596
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on being brave in facing my new life..new beginning.
(Preview)
I don't think that it would be a struggle for me to accept that I am venturing into a new form of me. I have always wanted to have a nice life and to feel freedom from all of the aches. I felt that I belong in my al-Anon family because its a nice feeling to have that opportunity to finally see how a family should...
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ann margaret
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6
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377
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STEP 5
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t57392387/alanon-step-5/
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hotrod
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2
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696
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I don't want to talk about it
(Preview)
So I haven't been here in a very long time. Something about typing my thoughts and feelings out makes them feel more real. AH was sober for about 3-4 months a couple years ago. It was a pretty nice time. But naturally, it slipped. Now, the drinking isn't as often as he used to, but more prolonged when...
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Hot Chicka
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12
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484
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My son
(Preview)
Since my son was released a year ago from prison due to a technical violation of his parole, I have known that it was only a matter of time without his willingness to enter a recovery program in earnest that the disease would drag him back down. Instead of worrying about when the next shoe would drop, I ch...
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grateful2be
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16
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498
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Denial and other things ..
(Preview)
Good morning all, I had a very long talk with two people last night my STBAX's s/mom who I used to be very close to and my sponsor. S/mom has been avoiding me as I wanted to talk to her before the kids started seeing her again .. she needed to be aware of why the parenting agreement is the way it is ... I had tal...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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457
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doing ok
(Preview)
feels like awhile since i have connected. . its been a strange and emotional couple of weeks. as you know about about a month ago i was planning my divorce. . and then i stayed. now after that must admitt i think my ah was shook up a bit. he adjusted his ways. made some effort and has been actuallt trying. hes...
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Theoceancalls
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5
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420
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Okay getting excited about the new man in my life.....
(Preview)
I really think I hit the jackpot here. It is still very new and I am taking my time, but this guy seems so healthy. He has a great job and is a hard worker, great dad to his kids, is a softball coach for one of their teams and just seems so well rounded. We have been hanging out and talking and I am just amazed. He h...
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Breakingfree
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11
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386
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Mysterious ways
(Preview)
After my nice little outburst today, I left the house to get the emissions checked on the little car I bought in February. It hadn't passed the initial smog check and for lack of funds I had to get an extension so that I could do the repairs. My extension had expired a few days ago and I'd been so afraid that I...
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Raven Juniper
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7
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428
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Just Breathe
(Preview)
As I was washing the dishes a few moments ago asking, "what do I do", I hear the words of a song "just breathe". To me that means attend to me and stay in this moment. The event that pushed me into this place was the news that my 11 year old granddaughter is displaying increased sig...
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PP
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15
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553
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Oh Well. What am I going to do?
(Preview)
Apparently, A hit someone at work today. I actually sympathised for a while as he told me how this guy had "provoked him" until I realised..hang on...isn't that what he's always says about me? It's amazing that I bought into it at first. It's amazing that I always have bought into his tales o...
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Melly1248
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10
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569
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My life after RLC
(Preview)
I've been thinking about Rodney a lot lately. I miss him every day and I think he is with me. I have divorced my husband moved to Birmingham and started my life over again. I have met a great man who is the opposite of an addict and loves and respects me. I left my alcoholic husband over a year ago when he waved...
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MDK
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5
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384
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tears of love & support
(Preview)
I really feel the love on MIP. I am so grateful for all of you. I just recently read a reply from my post that started me to cry a little. I appreciate all the comments & times when I need them the most, you faithful members always come through for me. Even w/ all the struggles w/ my mom over the long haul &a...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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248
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Foot in mouth alert!
(Preview)
I made the mistake of asking that my feelings be given the same rating as a visitor might get this morning. What was I thinking! Well I wasn't (thinking) really was I!! Anyway, it unleashed a load of stuff and hurtful words from me as well as from AH. Why, oh why, did I think it was worth saying any of it? ...
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milkwood
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6
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398
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The interview
(Preview)
The trip was great. I was nervous at the interview but I did my best and they will let me know if I am hired. She asked me why I was moving so far from home. I told the truth I said I was getting divorced and I was looking for a fresh start and that I had always wanted to live in a big city. I told her I did the applicat...
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texasgal
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7
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243
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Smoking and stuffing emotions
(Preview)
Discovery... I use smoking to stuff emotions. Hmmm now the processing will begin.
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Truth
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14
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580
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Sat and confered with my Sponsor.
(Preview)
Amazing that I got the distinct feeling and impression that both his HP and mine were sitting there. My sponsor works hard at listening and filtering what he hears thru his own experiences. I love and appreciate that...he is not flash answers, not one shoe, mine fits all and I could see him listeni...
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Jerry F
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5
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358
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How did you have The Talk?
(Preview)
Hi everyone I'm new here. Really glad to have found this forum. I need a bit of sanity at the moment. I know there's no magic bullet and no instant answer to my question, but I'm hoping you can offer some advice. How did you have The Talk? (the one about your A's drinking and how it impacted you) and ho...
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yankshirerose
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14
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541
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Court stuff ..
(Preview)
Well, here's the bottom line .. it is important legally for me to document these things and DO need legal proof of things that are occurring I can document that is not as strong as the police being involved. I did ask my atty to ask my STBAX's atty if he knew where he was? Was he in jail? Was he in the hospit...
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SerenityRUS
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7
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450
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Update on 'my story' at meeting
(Preview)
Ok, so I was sitting at the front table and people kept filing in, I mean like more and more and more people and they had to borrow chairs from AA's room, etc. It was the most packed I've seen our room EVER! Yep, no pressure, just 60 sets(Ok, maybe 55) of eyes on me. One of my friends looks at all the people c...
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ilovedogs
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9
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492
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My alcoholic brother
(Preview)
I dont even know where to start. He has been drinking heavily for 10 years. He is now 35. Still lives with my mother who is on disability. She pays all of the bills with the little bit of money she gets & he doesnt give her much to live there. His paycheck goes to alcohol. He walks all over her & she let...
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pkm
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9
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543
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I'm scared and anxiety all at once
(Preview)
I had a blow up with the person I live with. He told me to get the F out now. I not going right this minute but I'm leaving as soon as possible. My anxiety is because now I have to find a place to live and get my stuff moved and it is giving me anxiety and fear. I know this is best. I have to get some money togeth...
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Cathyinaz
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20
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711
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Wellness Check ..
(Preview)
Because I'm not sure how to handle the whole no show .. I totally understood it after he was arrested for violating the OP (yes and no .. it would have been simple NOT to contact me and still see the kids). He ducked out on the kids for almost 8 months I didn't have to have contact closer to about 9 I think. An...
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SerenityRUS
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7
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701
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