Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

SpiderArcana · SpiderArcana

I have come to terms with everything. I've done my work, continue to do my work, live my life. Enjoy myself when times are good, and work to change and grow when times are bad. One thing I never expected was how lonely all of this was. While I greatly value AlAnon and it's support, and I have my own friend...

BlueBequia · BlueBequia

Yes, I'm a newcomer to the online chatroom. I started attending regular meetings the end of May and except for a few out of town occasions I've been going every week. Since separating from my husband two weeks ago I am in a new area and finding my way. I feel pretty good and AlAnon has really helped me a gre...

Jen61 · Jen61

When we try to control, we become controlled; When we release, we become free. Bryant McGill This was sent to me through Facebook and it really rings true. I have attached the photo, but I am not sure if it will all come through. After reading this a few things I felt like such a relief leaving my should...

swimmom · swimmom

My daughter's therapist suggested I try to find some type of on-line support for my pre-teen daughter whose father (my ex) is an A. Can anyone on this forum give me some suggestions of what that might look like? Links, etc to explore? She doesn't want the "face to face" of meetings but I be...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Is anyone on our board from San Francisco or have family members or friends there? There appears to be some really scary stuff going on according to my internet update. Lots of prayers and positive thoughts being sent their way.

Aloha · Aloha

At a meeting last night we read from As We Understood (it's an 11th step meeting so the group reads from that gem every week). The passage had a wonderful analogy of a tight-rope walker asking his audience if they had faith if he could make it across - they cheered him on and then he came up with a wheelbarro...

Kay10 · Kay10

I met him, felt an immediate connection (turns out he's very much like my father) and married him after a few short months. Didn't take long to see that alcohol was a problem, and I tried to reason with him about controlling himself. That turned into lies and fights and loss of trust (as newlyweds). A fe...

Jerry F · Jerry F

That question just screamed itself at me while being here and reading and participating in all of your other lives. Why haven't I mentioned it here and not often on the outside either. Why is it that my wife did a broadcast and I didn't. Why don't I celebrate good stuff and just take them for gran...

fedup75 · fedup75

Hi there....I am new to this site and was wondering if anyone could give me some advice. My husband is an alcoholic. We have been married for 11 years now and he has got worse and worse. His recent trip to hospital for nearly a month ended with him buying a bottle of Gin on the way home! He has told me that he ha...

1lostmom · 1lostmom

Yesterday, I attended The. Most. Awkward baby shower ever, and came home to find my husband drunk. I said nothing. He still attempted to find a way to be angry at me and blame me for this failing disaster of a marriage, and proceeded to storm off to bed at 8pm. Normally, I would be dumping bottles, or ru...

texasgal · texasgal

I've been in this new city for almost a month and have been hit on three times...loll my low self-esteem always had me thinking I was an ugly duckling. I did exchange numbers with one guy. So far we have just texted a few times. He asked me out on a date. It took me abt 5 hrs to text back I had to call my alanon fri...

grateful2be · grateful2be

I notice that I can't enter the Step room, chat room or any other room other than this one. Is anyone else experiencing that? The error message is that the page can't be displayed from the web?

missmeliss · missmeliss

I'm actually a little shocked by how much I am enjoying this. Because my week was filled with "doings" and achievements I felt OK with just enjoying the peace today. I lay outside in the sun for most of it listening to the birds and just "being in the moment". I thought..you know w...

cloudyskies · cloudyskies

I fully understand that I am completely and utterly powerless over alcohol. I know what it is, and I know and understand the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual pain that this powerful drug can inflict. I understand that I am powerless and I accept this. With this new understanding, I know Go...

el-cee · el-cee

Lately, ive heard alcoholism being compared to cancer or dementia or other diseases. Can it really be compared to other diseases that are completely outwith the persons control? Ive heard someone ask, would you leave someone with parkinsons or ms? Probably not but I left someone with alcoholism, t...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi all. I am at the beginning of a week's vacation with my A. I am pleased to report that so far there is no drinking. There is way too much eating. No gambling either yet. I guess 2 out of 3 aint bad. I have a very draining job and I have been looking forward to being away from work. I thought I would want...

Tampa · Tampa

Sunday 8/24/2014 Spiritual Story: Connected through Nature's Beauty Meeting scheduled in the Al-Anon chat room. Today's Spiritual Story is:Connected through Nature's Beauty. Today's Spiritual Question is: Do I see the beauty found in nature? The website link to the group meeting room is htt...

ejriney · ejriney

So I have been a relationship with my boyfriend for almost a year now. I have know him for about 8 years though. Everything was perfectly fine. I knew he had a history with drinking and had DUI's but he had finally gotten help and cleaned up. He was everything and more I could ask for in a man. He is the man I wa...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

Hi, I've decided it's time to ask a sponsor into my life. I have been looking off and on for a little while, but still have basically two gentlemen that I found at one of my first meetings. I don't have good access to a lot of meetings, I was hoping to broaden the field a bit, but I don't think I will be able t...

Aloha · Aloha

Just feeling sad tonight and recognizing my urges to use other people to feel good about myself and validate myself, mostly other men who apparently, according to my sick psyche, are the most important people out there to tell me just how worthy I am or am not. I'm in a situation right now where I feel lik...

shosh18 · shosh18

So last night I got on alanon chat and my A went and slept in another bedroom yelling out that I don't care about him anymore and I am game playing. This morning he said he was too sick to get up and come with me as we had planned to go and get out grandson. I asked him if I could do anything for him and he said th...

jillian · jillian

Hi im new here and not to sure how this works. But im so lost and i dont even know where to begin. I Will Ramble If I Allow.myself So Ill Cut.it Short. My Husbands An Alcoholic has Been for 17 years We Have been Married For Five And have two amazing Children. I Made Him Leave Two Weeks Agao and i Dont know How To...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I forgot to say, I started my new course last week. (mental health/drug and alcohol). It felt SO GOOD to get up, DRIVE myself somewhere and spend the days with other grown-ups doing grown-up stuff! (Well actually, there was an awful lot of giggling and at one point we built towers out of colored straws...

Luiza · Luiza

We are abroad in a beach Villa. H has been drinking from the airport, on the plane and here non stop for 3 days now. I have been minding my own business and leaving him alone. Tonight he came in our apartment drunk and as daughter woke up and asked for water he did give it to her. Than kept talking and kissi...

me123 · me123

Last night my husband came home from a ball game having had a lot to drink. He says 5 beers, willing to bet it was more. What put me over the top was that he drove himself and two others home. My SIL call her brother the highest functioning A she knows. He is a professional, owns his own bizness and is a directo...

lookingup · lookingup

Felt good also to have been at a meeting,Im anxious to get to going to my FTf meetings,I found a ph.no to call to find the exact location of the FTf meeting.hugs ,I'm grate full for all your replies to get to a meeting and your pushing me to keep the focus on myself and to take care of ME! It's wired that when I s...

Hullibee · Hullibee

I have been struggling all day with this question. Last night had a talk with AH. He has been acting hinky since weekend. I asked him about it and he said he was thinking of leaving our house. Then the next thing he said was will you take me back if I do leave.. What am I to make of that? I reminded him tha...

SunshineGirl · SunshineGirl

Lovely bright, sunny day here in the UK. Sat quietly enjoying the warmth and motivation I am getting from reading these boards. I had quite a few maintenance jobs that needed doing around my home. I am feeling very blessed as I can hear the builder I have employed to do them working away. The work ...

astallaslions · astallaslions

I've been up on all night crying, finally went to sleep, dreamed of the house we said we'd always built, making music in it with him. As he stomped around on guitar like a kid, I tried to accompany him w/ a tiny broken violin, and it was the most frustrating thing. I could hear the melody, and could squeak ou...

lookingup · lookingup

Where do I or can I go or call to get directions to the meeting that's held in my next town over?today seems to be going peaceful just hope it stays this way for now anyway,I know and expect chaos and drama will come again just need to be prepared mentally I'm anxious to get started going to FTf now and I'm anx...

pinkchip · pinkchip

This should not be a surprise and I guess it's not. This comes from the 8 months I worked with adult clients in Rehab. Most of them were Heroin addicts and this one was as well. 26 years old. I worked really hard with him, his family... He had issues with depression as well. He could do okay in rehab, b...

Cooper · Cooper

I am new to all this, attended my first Al-anon meeting last week, my second meeting just last evening. One of the common themes members talk about is learning to accept our loved ones disease and realize we can't fix them. I am going to be frankly honest and strongly disagree with that thinking. I...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

LOL .. I KNEW this was going to happen .. he showed up in the green car and I had set a boundary that while the car was NOT in his name he would NOT be driving the kids around in it. I'm sorry ... someone else's car and I don't know this person and so on. So I laughed to myself .. as I walked out before the kids did...

grateful2be · grateful2be

We haven't heard anything since yesterday. Are you doing okay?

lookingup · lookingup

I'm hungry,angry,lonesome,and tired ,what next?ive been cooking cooked a great supper abf has been sick with cold but eating like a horse,he said he was feeling better this morning,little if any contact with him,he lies in bed for most part.i guess all the pills he is taking to get better has him tire...

Debilyn · Debilyn

My dear neighbor texted me today if I had seen her 15 year old dog Ginger. Gin has been coming to my place for 14 years, a yellow lab. We share her. (c: They gave up paying someone to watch their house and her as she would just come to me. One night late I get the is Ginger there call. We were out with flashlight...

Katy · Katy

With alchoholics not in recovery they become very many people, thats my experience anyway, my problem is trying to make them into just one personality, one that suits me, pointing out someone elses short falls or highlighting thier traits is not nice and very cruel I have done that, trying to gently g...

lookingup · lookingup

Sorry,but I'm needing to vent ,abf mistress or whatever she is called his cell ph I went ballistic ,abf swore up and down that he hadnt talked to her or anything in weeks,he said he was selling his phone tomorrow but I think he is haveing to sell it for money to get to work I dunno,I'm still upset about it a...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

I am trying to sort through some issues. One that is not settling no matter how much I pray and continue to tell myself it's just not my business. I have come to find out that A got involved with a female counsellor at detox centre and has gone away with her overnight and continued to carry on a relationship...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

Hi. I am feeling so overwhelmed, lonely and worried. My second child is off to college. I know it's a good thing. But now it's only me and my youngest 8 yr old at home. I am trying very very hard to look at the good things. youngest child just put her stuff in older sister's closet and drawers. It was cute, and...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Sooo the last 6 months I have fallen in love, my sponsor died, got to go to Texas, I broke my right arm, my car died and I had to buy a new one, the newer car is in the shop and needs a new transmission after owning it 90 days, I have had some amazing weekends with the new boyfriend and our kids, I am working my pr...

pinkchip · pinkchip

This is a poem I came across in AA meetings. I posted it on the AA boards but I thought some of you might like to read it cuz this is what you see going on right in front your your face. It sort of helps to understand alcoholism I guess. For most alcoholics these things are all on different continuums and on...

el-cee · el-cee

Someone mentioned this lately that the man is seperate from the disease. Im not sure I get it. When the man is drunk, hes still the man, when hes sober hes still a sober sick man so what part is the man? being sober doesnt make him a different man surely. I mean how would you even know the man if hes being an a...

Tash2 · Tash2

Hi there. this is my first time posting here, tho I've been accessing sign hire for a while. My AH is my husband of 8yrs, been together 15. He was always a big drinker, I didn't really think much of it when we first met as we were both young & enjoyed the party scene. It's only since we've had the kids &...

Amg70 · Amg70

I am wondering what the protocol is for dating another al anon member. I have been single for 5 years and feel ready to date. There is a man in a meeting I attend who is age appropriate and emotionally available.

AshleyA · AshleyA

Hi Everyone, I just needed to connect with people who probably can identify with the way I am feeling right now. As some of you know who read my previous post several days ago, I have broken up with my ABF. I have to live in his home for the next 6 weeks. I am still waiting to hear whether I have gotten the a...

Katy · Katy

I never learn things quickly and I have to do them over and over until they sink in, I suppose I am just needing to touch the hot stove again, my husband was a big drinker when we first met, I think i had one year with him before he fianally stopped and within that year I had found alanon and so began the unrave...

Flossy · Flossy

Why would someone who admits they are an alcoholic, who achieved sobriety for 10 years after almost dying, continue to regularly drink after their first relapse 4 years ago? This is on and off. He has apparently had periods where he has stayed sober for 6 months, but in the 18 months I've known him he h...

Mattie · Mattie

I used to think, when I wasn't in a relationship, that I was single because: I wasn't good enough for a relationship. No one would find me appealing or worthwhile. I didn't deserve to be in a relationship. I was just a loser and everyone could tell. But I'm single right now and I suddenly realized why! I'...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

You know I was always praying for rain and today HP answered me BIG TIME. Phoenix got hit so hard I thought it was going to wash away. Up here in New River we got 4 1/2 inches in about a hour. The streets were being scraped but the mud and rock is everywhere. Coming down a street to get home is a dip through a...

Tossed Salad · Tossed Salad

I am always amazed at how my HP works. This week was quite eventful, so I apologize if this is a little long. My AH and I have been separated since January & we were separated 5 months last year. I had hope that he had hit his bottom and would seek help this go around. He almost crashed and killed our 6...

lookingup · lookingup

I'm needing a onser to help me with my step work,I'm been trying to do them all by myself but I was told that I can't do them by myself.anybody here want to volunteer for the job ?thanks

nichtdaisy · nichtdaisy

My second query to the forum, shortly after the first. That one will give you background. My ABF and I had a "come to jesus" moment six weeks ago after he was arrested for drunk& disorderly on the Fourth and he kept drinking 36+ hours after being released from jail. I wasn't directly im...

SunshineGirl · SunshineGirl

Particularly thankful for the gift of Al-anon today. Because of what I have learnt and practised, I was able to detach with love and remove myself from the crisis that my AH was busy trying to create to drink at. I saw it for what it was, his stuff not mine. I declined his invitation to a fight and pit...

texasgal · texasgal

My friend has dug herself in deeper she borrowed another $500 this weekend from a coworker and continues to lie for everything. I have blocked her number from my phone. I know she is miserable but I have to draw the line somewhere. I'm grateful for learning abt boundaries and when to separate myself fro...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I have shared all over fb this, If someone has a life saving rope to help them, if they have a broken arm, they can do nothing to save themselves. Depression, Addiction, mental illness, your brain is broken, compromised. It cannot think correctly. How does anyone not get that? if one drinks his brain is...

Debilyn · Debilyn

OMGosh, I just realized something. It really hit me. HE called me today. The man I loved and love, liked. I still like him. He sends me an email off and on sharing some important event. (throwing me scraps?) Then months go by. I don't email him much. Its like why bother and he is married......still........

Mirandac · Mirandac

I will need courage to fight my dry ah on selling our property. He thought it was a slam dunk of paper changing hands only till my lawyer looked at tax returns and said there is no way either of you can afford to pay that mtg Alone. He finally got his copy of letter this weekend. I am very nervous. I have an appr...

missmeliss · missmeliss

S -- Edited by missmeliss on Tuesday 19th of August 2014 02:33:07 AM

Luiza · Luiza

So, we all have been off work/school for 7 days now. I have to say that surprisingly it was a very good week indeed. I was dreading it if I am honest. Husband drank moderately and behaved well through out the week. He did activities with daughter from his own initiative and was more than happy looking afte...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	We walk alone (Preview) I have come to terms with everything. I've done my work, continue to do my work, live my life. Enjoy myself when times are good, and work to change and grow when times are bad. One thing I never expected was how lonely all of this was. While I greatly value AlAnon and it's support, and I have my own friend...	SpiderArcana	5	545	Aug 25, 2014 by Jerry F
	Hello everyone, I'm new here. (Preview) Yes, I'm a newcomer to the online chatroom. I started attending regular meetings the end of May and except for a few out of town occasions I've been going every week. Since separating from my husband two weeks ago I am in a new area and finding my way. I feel pretty good and AlAnon has really helped me a gre...	BlueBequia	8	625	Aug 25, 2014 by Jerry F
	When we control.................. (Preview) When we try to control, we become controlled; When we release, we become free. Bryant McGill This was sent to me through Facebook and it really rings true. I have attached the photo, but I am not sure if it will all come through. After reading this a few things I felt like such a relief leaving my should...	Jen61	3	326	Aug 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	looking for online support for pre-teen (Preview) My daughter's therapist suggested I try to find some type of on-line support for my pre-teen daughter whose father (my ex) is an A. Can anyone on this forum give me some suggestions of what that might look like? Links, etc to explore? She doesn't want the "face to face" of meetings but I be...	swimmom	1	335	Aug 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	Earthquake in San Francisco/Any members affected? (Preview) Is anyone on our board from San Francisco or have family members or friends there? There appears to be some really scary stuff going on according to my internet update. Lots of prayers and positive thoughts being sent their way.	grateful2be	10	672	Aug 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	Hop in that wheelbarrow (Preview) At a meeting last night we read from As We Understood (it's an 11th step meeting so the group reads from that gem every week). The passage had a wonderful analogy of a tight-rope walker asking his audience if they had faith if he could make it across - they cheered him on and then he came up with a wheelbarro...	Aloha	8	499	Aug 24, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Dry drunk? Sociopath? (Preview) I met him, felt an immediate connection (turns out he's very much like my father) and married him after a few short months. Didn't take long to see that alcohol was a problem, and I tried to reason with him about controlling himself. That turned into lies and fights and loss of trust (as newlyweds). A fe...	Kay10	12	3904	Aug 24, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	How important is it?!! (Preview) That question just screamed itself at me while being here and reading and participating in all of your other lives. Why haven't I mentioned it here and not often on the outside either. Why is it that my wife did a broadcast and I didn't. Why don't I celebrate good stuff and just take them for gran...	Jerry F	17	637	Aug 24, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Fed up and need advice. (Preview) Hi there....I am new to this site and was wondering if anyone could give me some advice. My husband is an alcoholic. We have been married for 11 years now and he has got worse and worse. His recent trip to hospital for nearly a month ended with him buying a bottle of Gin on the way home! He has told me that he ha...	fedup75	11	764	Aug 24, 2014 by hotrod
	Sunday (Preview) Yesterday, I attended The. Most. Awkward baby shower ever, and came home to find my husband drunk. I said nothing. He still attempted to find a way to be angry at me and blame me for this failing disaster of a marriage, and proceeded to storm off to bed at 8pm. Normally, I would be dumping bottles, or ru...	1lostmom	5	479	Aug 24, 2014 by hotrod
	dating? (Preview) I've been in this new city for almost a month and have been hit on three times...loll my low self-esteem always had me thinking I was an ugly duckling. I did exchange numbers with one guy. So far we have just texted a few times. He asked me out on a date. It took me abt 5 hrs to text back I had to call my alanon fri...	texasgal	8	591	Aug 24, 2014 by Debilyn
	Question on entering rooms (Preview) I notice that I can't enter the Step room, chat room or any other room other than this one. Is anyone else experiencing that? The error message is that the page can't be displayed from the web?	grateful2be	8	359	Aug 24, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	This sucks so much less than I expected.... (Preview) I'm actually a little shocked by how much I am enjoying this. Because my week was filled with "doings" and achievements I felt OK with just enjoying the peace today. I lay outside in the sun for most of it listening to the birds and just "being in the moment". I thought..you know w...	missmeliss	10	677	Aug 24, 2014 by PP
	What will I find? (Preview) I fully understand that I am completely and utterly powerless over alcohol. I know what it is, and I know and understand the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual pain that this powerful drug can inflict. I understand that I am powerless and I accept this. With this new understanding, I know Go...	cloudyskies	8	540	Aug 24, 2014 by PP
	can alcoholism be compared to cancer? (Preview) Lately, ive heard alcoholism being compared to cancer or dementia or other diseases. Can it really be compared to other diseases that are completely outwith the persons control? Ive heard someone ask, would you leave someone with parkinsons or ms? Probably not but I left someone with alcoholism, t...	el-cee	32	1038	Aug 24, 2014 by grateful2be
	on vacation with my A (Preview) Hi all. I am at the beginning of a week's vacation with my A. I am pleased to report that so far there is no drinking. There is way too much eating. No gambling either yet. I guess 2 out of 3 aint bad. I have a very draining job and I have been looking forward to being away from work. I thought I would want...	Lyne	6	475	Aug 24, 2014 by el-cee
	Sunday 8/24/2014 Spiritual Story: Connected through Nature's Beauty (Preview) Sunday 8/24/2014 Spiritual Story: Connected through Nature's Beauty Meeting scheduled in the Al-Anon chat room. Today's Spiritual Story is:Connected through Nature's Beauty. Today's Spiritual Question is: Do I see the beauty found in nature? The website link to the group meeting room is htt...	Tampa	0	256	Aug 24, 2014 by Tampa
	lost and hopeless (Preview) So I have been a relationship with my boyfriend for almost a year now. I have know him for about 8 years though. Everything was perfectly fine. I knew he had a history with drinking and had DUI's but he had finally gotten help and cleaned up. He was everything and more I could ask for in a man. He is the man I wa...	ejriney	5	623	Aug 24, 2014 by 1lostmom
	Guidance for sponsor selection (Preview) Hi, I've decided it's time to ask a sponsor into my life. I have been looking off and on for a little while, but still have basically two gentlemen that I found at one of my first meetings. I don't have good access to a lot of meetings, I was hoping to broaden the field a bit, but I don't think I will be able t...	KennyFenderjazz	10	564	Aug 23, 2014 by tiredtonite
	Keep putting those eggs in that one basket (Preview) Just feeling sad tonight and recognizing my urges to use other people to feel good about myself and validate myself, mostly other men who apparently, according to my sick psyche, are the most important people out there to tell me just how worthy I am or am not. I'm in a situation right now where I feel lik...	Aloha	7	501	Aug 23, 2014 by michaelwriting
	Help.. he is trying to manipulate me (Preview) So last night I got on alanon chat and my A went and slept in another bedroom yelling out that I don't care about him anymore and I am game playing. This morning he said he was too sick to get up and come with me as we had planned to go and get out grandson. I asked him if I could do anything for him and he said th...	shosh18	6	578	Aug 23, 2014 by shosh18
	how do i begin to let go? (Preview) Hi im new here and not to sure how this works. But im so lost and i dont even know where to begin. I Will Ramble If I Allow.myself So Ill Cut.it Short. My Husbands An Alcoholic has Been for 17 years We Have been Married For Five And have two amazing Children. I Made Him Leave Two Weeks Agao and i Dont know How To...	jillian	3	610	Aug 23, 2014 by grateful2be
	In all the excitement... (Preview) I forgot to say, I started my new course last week. (mental health/drug and alcohol). It felt SO GOOD to get up, DRIVE myself somewhere and spend the days with other grown-ups doing grown-up stuff! (Well actually, there was an awful lot of giggling and at one point we built towers out of colored straws...	missmeliss	10	542	Aug 23, 2014 by milkwood
	Just fled my holiday accomodation. (Preview) We are abroad in a beach Villa. H has been drinking from the airport, on the plane and here non stop for 3 days now. I have been minding my own business and leaving him alone. Tonight he came in our apartment drunk and as daughter woke up and asked for water he did give it to her. Than kept talking and kissi...	Luiza	17	625	Aug 22, 2014 by Rea
	Do I belong here? (Preview) Last night my husband came home from a ball game having had a lot to drink. He says 5 beers, willing to bet it was more. What put me over the top was that he drove himself and two others home. My SIL call her brother the highest functioning A she knows. He is a professional, owns his own bizness and is a directo...	me123	1	301	Aug 22, 2014 by grateful2be
	Made my mip meeting last nite (Preview) Felt good also to have been at a meeting,Im anxious to get to going to my FTf meetings,I found a ph.no to call to find the exact location of the FTf meeting.hugs ,I'm grate full for all your replies to get to a meeting and your pushing me to keep the focus on myself and to take care of ME! It's wired that when I s...	lookingup	8	412	Aug 22, 2014 by lookingup
	Is it Time To Go? (Preview) I have been struggling all day with this question. Last night had a talk with AH. He has been acting hinky since weekend. I asked him about it and he said he was thinking of leaving our house. Then the next thing he said was will you take me back if I do leave.. What am I to make of that? I reminded him tha...	Hullibee	21	869	Aug 22, 2014 by andromeda
	Sunny day (Preview) Lovely bright, sunny day here in the UK. Sat quietly enjoying the warmth and motivation I am getting from reading these boards. I had quite a few maintenance jobs that needed doing around my home. I am feeling very blessed as I can hear the builder I have employed to do them working away. The work ...	SunshineGirl	7	519	Aug 22, 2014 by SunshineGirl
	the folk singer alcoholic….uggh (Preview) I've been up on all night crying, finally went to sleep, dreamed of the house we said we'd always built, making music in it with him. As he stomped around on guitar like a kid, I tried to accompany him w/ a tiny broken violin, and it was the most frustrating thing. I could hear the melody, and could squeak ou...	astallaslions	4	577	Aug 22, 2014 by Debilyn
	Finding a FTf meeting (Preview) Where do I or can I go or call to get directions to the meeting that's held in my next town over?today seems to be going peaceful just hope it stays this way for now anyway,I know and expect chaos and drama will come again just need to be prepared mentally I'm anxious to get started going to FTf now and I'm anx...	lookingup	10	433	Aug 22, 2014 by lookingup
	Former client overdosed and died (Preview) This should not be a surprise and I guess it's not. This comes from the 8 months I worked with adult clients in Rehab. Most of them were Heroin addicts and this one was as well. 26 years old. I worked really hard with him, his family... He had issues with depression as well. He could do okay in rehab, b...	pinkchip	18	682	Aug 22, 2014 by WorkingThroughIt
	Acceptance ? No way. (Preview) I am new to all this, attended my first Al-anon meeting last week, my second meeting just last evening. One of the common themes members talk about is learning to accept our loved ones disease and realize we can't fix them. I am going to be frankly honest and strongly disagree with that thinking. I...	Cooper	21	902	Aug 22, 2014 by WorkingThroughIt
	Green Car .. (Preview) LOL .. I KNEW this was going to happen .. he showed up in the green car and I had set a boundary that while the car was NOT in his name he would NOT be driving the kids around in it. I'm sorry ... someone else's car and I don't know this person and so on. So I laughed to myself .. as I walked out before the kids did...	SerenityRUS	14	551	Aug 22, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Cathy? Update please. (Preview) We haven't heard anything since yesterday. Are you doing okay?	grateful2be	5	453	Aug 22, 2014 by tiredtonite
	Halt (Preview) I'm hungry,angry,lonesome,and tired ,what next?ive been cooking cooked a great supper abf has been sick with cold but eating like a horse,he said he was feeling better this morning,little if any contact with him,he lies in bed for most part.i guess all the pills he is taking to get better has him tire...	lookingup	3	349	Aug 22, 2014 by Jerry F
	weird memory (Preview) My dear neighbor texted me today if I had seen her 15 year old dog Ginger. Gin has been coming to my place for 14 years, a yellow lab. We share her. (c: They gave up paying someone to watch their house and her as she would just come to me. One night late I get the is Ginger there call. We were out with flashlight...	Debilyn	4	464	Aug 21, 2014 by Jerry F
	when someone shows you who they are believe it! (Preview) With alchoholics not in recovery they become very many people, thats my experience anyway, my problem is trying to make them into just one personality, one that suits me, pointing out someone elses short falls or highlighting thier traits is not nice and very cruel I have done that, trying to gently g...	Katy	8	497	Aug 21, 2014 by blessed
	Needing to vent (Preview) Sorry,but I'm needing to vent ,abf mistress or whatever she is called his cell ph I went ballistic ,abf swore up and down that he hadnt talked to her or anything in weeks,he said he was selling his phone tomorrow but I think he is haveing to sell it for money to get to work I dunno,I'm still upset about it a...	lookingup	4	353	Aug 21, 2014 by PP
	Need help sorting through the yuck! (Preview) I am trying to sort through some issues. One that is not settling no matter how much I pray and continue to tell myself it's just not my business. I have come to find out that A got involved with a female counsellor at detox centre and has gone away with her overnight and continued to carry on a relationship...	Mari1978	10	645	Aug 21, 2014 by Sweet Stanley
	I am trying my best not to have a serious meltdown (Preview) Hi. I am feeling so overwhelmed, lonely and worried. My second child is off to college. I know it's a good thing. But now it's only me and my youngest 8 yr old at home. I am trying very very hard to look at the good things. youngest child just put her stuff in older sister's closet and drawers. It was cute, and...	Newlife girl	7	463	Aug 21, 2014 by grateful2be
	Peaks and valleys big time..... (Preview) Sooo the last 6 months I have fallen in love, my sponsor died, got to go to Texas, I broke my right arm, my car died and I had to buy a new one, the newer car is in the shop and needs a new transmission after owning it 90 days, I have had some amazing weekends with the new boyfriend and our kids, I am working my pr...	Breakingfree	15	689	Aug 21, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	Why I drank (Preview) This is a poem I came across in AA meetings. I posted it on the AA boards but I thought some of you might like to read it cuz this is what you see going on right in front your your face. It sort of helps to understand alcoholism I guess. For most alcoholics these things are all on different continuums and on...	pinkchip	19	1025	Aug 21, 2014 by Newlife girl
	why is the man and the disease seperate? (Preview) Someone mentioned this lately that the man is seperate from the disease. Im not sure I get it. When the man is drunk, hes still the man, when hes sober hes still a sober sick man so what part is the man? being sober doesnt make him a different man surely. I mean how would you even know the man if hes being an a...	el-cee	21	803	Aug 21, 2014 by SunshineGirl
	Another night of anxiety & no sleep- my story. (Preview) Hi there. this is my first time posting here, tho I've been accessing sign hire for a while. My AH is my husband of 8yrs, been together 15. He was always a big drinker, I didn't really think much of it when we first met as we were both young & enjoyed the party scene. It's only since we've had the kids &...	Tash2	16	708	Aug 20, 2014 by Marie212
	Dating (Preview) I am wondering what the protocol is for dating another al anon member. I have been single for 5 years and feel ready to date. There is a man in a meeting I attend who is age appropriate and emotionally available.	Amg70	5	1158	Aug 20, 2014 by blessed
	Feeling Lonely and Anxious (Preview) Hi Everyone, I just needed to connect with people who probably can identify with the way I am feeling right now. As some of you know who read my previous post several days ago, I have broken up with my ABF. I have to live in his home for the next 6 weeks. I am still waiting to hear whether I have gotten the a...	AshleyA	2	401	Aug 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	why I have gone back home. (Preview) I never learn things quickly and I have to do them over and over until they sink in, I suppose I am just needing to touch the hot stove again, my husband was a big drinker when we first met, I think i had one year with him before he fianally stopped and within that year I had found alanon and so began the unrave...	Katy	3	491	Aug 20, 2014 by PP
	Sobriety - a choice or not? (Preview) Why would someone who admits they are an alcoholic, who achieved sobriety for 10 years after almost dying, continue to regularly drink after their first relapse 4 years ago? This is on and off. He has apparently had periods where he has stayed sober for 6 months, but in the 18 months I've known him he h...	Flossy	11	777	Aug 20, 2014 by Mattie
	I've realized why I'm single! (Preview) I used to think, when I wasn't in a relationship, that I was single because: I wasn't good enough for a relationship. No one would find me appealing or worthwhile. I didn't deserve to be in a relationship. I was just a loser and everyone could tell. But I'm single right now and I suddenly realized why! I'...	Mattie	18	792	Aug 20, 2014 by Cooper
	I was praying for rain (Preview) You know I was always praying for rain and today HP answered me BIG TIME. Phoenix got hit so hard I thought it was going to wash away. Up here in New River we got 4 1/2 inches in about a hour. The streets were being scraped but the mud and rock is everywhere. Coming down a street to get home is a dip through a...	Cathyinaz	8	565	Aug 20, 2014 by bud
	Another step (Preview) I am always amazed at how my HP works. This week was quite eventful, so I apologize if this is a little long. My AH and I have been separated since January & we were separated 5 months last year. I had hope that he had hit his bottom and would seek help this go around. He almost crashed and killed our 6...	Tossed Salad	9	409	Aug 19, 2014 by Tossed Salad
	Needing a sponser (Preview) I'm needing a onser to help me with my step work,I'm been trying to do them all by myself but I was told that I can't do them by myself.anybody here want to volunteer for the job ?thanks	lookingup	14	680	Aug 19, 2014 by PP
	How to handle ABF who has been talking the talk about treatment without going "co" / how to talk to his friend? (Preview) My second query to the forum, shortly after the first. That one will give you background. My ABF and I had a "come to jesus" moment six weeks ago after he was arrested for drunk& disorderly on the Fourth and he kept drinking 36+ hours after being released from jail. I wasn't directly im...	nichtdaisy	6	614	Aug 19, 2014 by nichtdaisy
	Thankful (Preview) Particularly thankful for the gift of Al-anon today. Because of what I have learnt and practised, I was able to detach with love and remove myself from the crisis that my AH was busy trying to create to drink at. I saw it for what it was, his stuff not mine. I declined his invitation to a fight and pit...	SunshineGirl	10	489	Aug 19, 2014 by SunshineGirl
	thankful for program (Preview) My friend has dug herself in deeper she borrowed another $500 this weekend from a coworker and continues to lie for everything. I have blocked her number from my phone. I know she is miserable but I have to draw the line somewhere. I'm grateful for learning abt boundaries and when to separate myself fro...	texasgal	6	346	Aug 19, 2014 by PP
	so why didn't he.... (Preview) I have shared all over fb this, If someone has a life saving rope to help them, if they have a broken arm, they can do nothing to save themselves. Depression, Addiction, mental illness, your brain is broken, compromised. It cannot think correctly. How does anyone not get that? if one drinks his brain is...	Debilyn	8	704	Aug 19, 2014 by Breakingfree
	shove me into shallow water before I get too deep.... (Preview) OMGosh, I just realized something. It really hit me. HE called me today. The man I loved and love, liked. I still like him. He sends me an email off and on sharing some important event. (throwing me scraps?) Then months go by. I don't email him much. Its like why bother and he is married......still........	Debilyn	18	7778	Aug 19, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Courage needed (Preview) I will need courage to fight my dry ah on selling our property. He thought it was a slam dunk of paper changing hands only till my lawyer looked at tax returns and said there is no way either of you can afford to pay that mtg Alone. He finally got his copy of letter this weekend. I am very nervous. I have an appr...	Mirandac	13	624	Aug 19, 2014 by Breakingfree
	This is getting old. (Preview) S -- Edited by missmeliss on Tuesday 19th of August 2014 02:33:07 AM	missmeliss	18	780	Aug 19, 2014 by pinkchip
	I thought I would be able to go on my holidays without needing to write a thread before departing... (Preview) So, we all have been off work/school for 7 days now. I have to say that surprisingly it was a very good week indeed. I was dreading it if I am honest. Husband drank moderately and behaved well through out the week. He did activities with daughter from his own initiative and was more than happy looking afte...	Luiza	9	588	Aug 19, 2014 by el-cee
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.