Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Cooper · Cooper

I am new to all this, attended my first Al-anon meeting last week, my second meeting just last evening. One of the common themes members talk about is learning to accept our loved ones disease and realize we can't fix them. I am going to be frankly honest and strongly disagree with that thinking. I...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

LOL .. I KNEW this was going to happen .. he showed up in the green car and I had set a boundary that while the car was NOT in his name he would NOT be driving the kids around in it. I'm sorry ... someone else's car and I don't know this person and so on. So I laughed to myself .. as I walked out before the kids did...

grateful2be · grateful2be

We haven't heard anything since yesterday. Are you doing okay?

lookingup · lookingup

I'm hungry,angry,lonesome,and tired ,what next?ive been cooking cooked a great supper abf has been sick with cold but eating like a horse,he said he was feeling better this morning,little if any contact with him,he lies in bed for most part.i guess all the pills he is taking to get better has him tire...

Debilyn · Debilyn

My dear neighbor texted me today if I had seen her 15 year old dog Ginger. Gin has been coming to my place for 14 years, a yellow lab. We share her. (c: They gave up paying someone to watch their house and her as she would just come to me. One night late I get the is Ginger there call. We were out with flashlight...

Katy · Katy

With alchoholics not in recovery they become very many people, thats my experience anyway, my problem is trying to make them into just one personality, one that suits me, pointing out someone elses short falls or highlighting thier traits is not nice and very cruel I have done that, trying to gently g...

lookingup · lookingup

Sorry,but I'm needing to vent ,abf mistress or whatever she is called his cell ph I went ballistic ,abf swore up and down that he hadnt talked to her or anything in weeks,he said he was selling his phone tomorrow but I think he is haveing to sell it for money to get to work I dunno,I'm still upset about it a...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

I am trying to sort through some issues. One that is not settling no matter how much I pray and continue to tell myself it's just not my business. I have come to find out that A got involved with a female counsellor at detox centre and has gone away with her overnight and continued to carry on a relationship...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

Hi. I am feeling so overwhelmed, lonely and worried. My second child is off to college. I know it's a good thing. But now it's only me and my youngest 8 yr old at home. I am trying very very hard to look at the good things. youngest child just put her stuff in older sister's closet and drawers. It was cute, and...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Sooo the last 6 months I have fallen in love, my sponsor died, got to go to Texas, I broke my right arm, my car died and I had to buy a new one, the newer car is in the shop and needs a new transmission after owning it 90 days, I have had some amazing weekends with the new boyfriend and our kids, I am working my pr...

pinkchip · pinkchip

This is a poem I came across in AA meetings. I posted it on the AA boards but I thought some of you might like to read it cuz this is what you see going on right in front your your face. It sort of helps to understand alcoholism I guess. For most alcoholics these things are all on different continuums and on...

el-cee · el-cee

Someone mentioned this lately that the man is seperate from the disease. Im not sure I get it. When the man is drunk, hes still the man, when hes sober hes still a sober sick man so what part is the man? being sober doesnt make him a different man surely. I mean how would you even know the man if hes being an a...

Tash2 · Tash2

Hi there. this is my first time posting here, tho I've been accessing sign hire for a while. My AH is my husband of 8yrs, been together 15. He was always a big drinker, I didn't really think much of it when we first met as we were both young & enjoyed the party scene. It's only since we've had the kids &...

Amg70 · Amg70

I am wondering what the protocol is for dating another al anon member. I have been single for 5 years and feel ready to date. There is a man in a meeting I attend who is age appropriate and emotionally available.

AshleyA · AshleyA

Hi Everyone, I just needed to connect with people who probably can identify with the way I am feeling right now. As some of you know who read my previous post several days ago, I have broken up with my ABF. I have to live in his home for the next 6 weeks. I am still waiting to hear whether I have gotten the a...

Katy · Katy

I never learn things quickly and I have to do them over and over until they sink in, I suppose I am just needing to touch the hot stove again, my husband was a big drinker when we first met, I think i had one year with him before he fianally stopped and within that year I had found alanon and so began the unrave...

Flossy · Flossy

Why would someone who admits they are an alcoholic, who achieved sobriety for 10 years after almost dying, continue to regularly drink after their first relapse 4 years ago? This is on and off. He has apparently had periods where he has stayed sober for 6 months, but in the 18 months I've known him he h...

Mattie · Mattie

I used to think, when I wasn't in a relationship, that I was single because: I wasn't good enough for a relationship. No one would find me appealing or worthwhile. I didn't deserve to be in a relationship. I was just a loser and everyone could tell. But I'm single right now and I suddenly realized why! I'...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

You know I was always praying for rain and today HP answered me BIG TIME. Phoenix got hit so hard I thought it was going to wash away. Up here in New River we got 4 1/2 inches in about a hour. The streets were being scraped but the mud and rock is everywhere. Coming down a street to get home is a dip through a...

Tossed Salad · Tossed Salad

I am always amazed at how my HP works. This week was quite eventful, so I apologize if this is a little long. My AH and I have been separated since January & we were separated 5 months last year. I had hope that he had hit his bottom and would seek help this go around. He almost crashed and killed our 6...

lookingup · lookingup

I'm needing a onser to help me with my step work,I'm been trying to do them all by myself but I was told that I can't do them by myself.anybody here want to volunteer for the job ?thanks

nichtdaisy · nichtdaisy

My second query to the forum, shortly after the first. That one will give you background. My ABF and I had a "come to jesus" moment six weeks ago after he was arrested for drunk& disorderly on the Fourth and he kept drinking 36+ hours after being released from jail. I wasn't directly im...

SunshineGirl · SunshineGirl

Particularly thankful for the gift of Al-anon today. Because of what I have learnt and practised, I was able to detach with love and remove myself from the crisis that my AH was busy trying to create to drink at. I saw it for what it was, his stuff not mine. I declined his invitation to a fight and pit...

texasgal · texasgal

My friend has dug herself in deeper she borrowed another $500 this weekend from a coworker and continues to lie for everything. I have blocked her number from my phone. I know she is miserable but I have to draw the line somewhere. I'm grateful for learning abt boundaries and when to separate myself fro...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I have shared all over fb this, If someone has a life saving rope to help them, if they have a broken arm, they can do nothing to save themselves. Depression, Addiction, mental illness, your brain is broken, compromised. It cannot think correctly. How does anyone not get that? if one drinks his brain is...

Debilyn · Debilyn

OMGosh, I just realized something. It really hit me. HE called me today. The man I loved and love, liked. I still like him. He sends me an email off and on sharing some important event. (throwing me scraps?) Then months go by. I don't email him much. Its like why bother and he is married......still........

Mirandac · Mirandac

I will need courage to fight my dry ah on selling our property. He thought it was a slam dunk of paper changing hands only till my lawyer looked at tax returns and said there is no way either of you can afford to pay that mtg Alone. He finally got his copy of letter this weekend. I am very nervous. I have an appr...

missmeliss · missmeliss

S -- Edited by missmeliss on Tuesday 19th of August 2014 02:33:07 AM

Luiza · Luiza

So, we all have been off work/school for 7 days now. I have to say that surprisingly it was a very good week indeed. I was dreading it if I am honest. Husband drank moderately and behaved well through out the week. He did activities with daughter from his own initiative and was more than happy looking afte...

Katy · Katy

Hello Mip so after spending a few weeks away from home and I started to feel I needed to bring some things to a close, I have been lucky that my husband has remained friendly and loving in my absence and allowed me to come and go freely without obstruction or control, however he has not asked me about anyth...

Jerry F · Jerry F

now is an often thing, a usual thing and a natural practice. How would I have ever thought it would have come to this as a milestone in my own recovery. I came in to Al-Anon "all buss up" as we say in pigeon...I came in pupule or in translation, crazy. I was angry and rageful and uncaring ab...

Flower49 · Flower49

Hi Everyone! So I ended up going to the convention and had a wonderful time. Got my cup full of great speakers and E/S/H. Amazingly enough because once again I decided to adjust my attitude and my mouth it went well with my AH. We talked and laughed and cried together. There was no pettiness, arguing noth...

lookingup · lookingup

Today went smooth ,my abf joined me at my friends house for grilling out,it was great,I enjoyed myself my abf was looking through his phone as usualcand I walked over to look too he closed it ,I told him that he wasn't right he said plz don't start let's not start,I can start drama with him cause of my resen...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Lol, so, my daughter is "Art Captain" at her school. She's quite a talented little drawer and painter like her father (I can string words together but my visual art is abysmal, even my stick-figures suck). So last night she mentions to me, "mum, I have completed all of the "art ta...

hope6147 · hope6147

Hi everybody. I'm new to this forum, and I'm new to Al-Anon. I've been to two meetings, and with my hectic schedule I plan to attend more. I need all the support I can get. And I need help, I'm willing to do anything. It's nice to be in the presence of people who understand. My alcoholic is my husband of 6 yea...

Advocate_For_Steve · Advocate_For_Steve

Hi there! I'm struggling with a situation which I think boils down to setting healthy boundaries in a relationship, along with keeping my nose in my own business. Looking for some E/H/S on this... I'm engaged to my AF, and my sponsor has been amazing at guiding me through my Al-Anon program. My AF is in h...

Flossy · Flossy

It happened again yesterday, it's insane. Is he intentionally trying to crazy make?! I was heading to a friends babies 1st birthday party yesterday when out of the blue (ex)ABF sends me a message saying he was at an AA meeting. Now I've not known him to attend a Saturday morning meeting EVER in the 18...

Tash2 · Tash2

Hi everyone After my pretty desperate post earlier this week, I wanted to share that I'm feeling more hopeful today! Not of my AH not drinking anymore (let go of that a while ago) but of my ability to manage my reactions better. Don't get me wrong, I know I still have a really long way to go, & I expect se...

Flossy · Flossy

Has anyone come across their As having itchy skin? My (ex)ABF has had this thing for the past year where he constantly scratches his side overnight, to the extent that it wakes me up. He doesn't even know he's doing it. I've said to him about it and he claims it's to do with my cats but he's also done it wh...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi All, I have been to an AA convention today with Al anon participation. My ABf is active again after two years sobriety. I stuck to my boundary after he stayed out over night and he moved out. I can not believe how much I have changed, I have detached and I am grabbing on to al anon with both hands. Meeti...

blessed · blessed

Today, I got to practice LIVE, AND LET LIVE. I was home for lunch, with my son, and a knock on the door. My son answered and I hear him ask for my AH. My son said he wasn't here.... Anyway, it turns out it is a man here to mow our yard. Seriously! lol! They measure our lawns in square feet; not acres. He has only...

milkwood · milkwood

I've been drifting down a bit recently and then I had a wonderful day out with friends and I can't tell you how much that has raised my spirits. It is so easy to stay at home here but being with others really is important for me. In the morning I went and had coffee with a girlfriend and her family. She had m...

lookingup · lookingup

The other woman that my abf said he did not cheat on me sent my abf a text to his phone two days- ago text said ....I love you. I had asked my abf to look at his icons on his ph. And I saw a messenger icon so I opened it up and to my surprise there she was agin.abf said he hadn't a clue that was there he then opened up th...

hotrod · hotrod

We are once again beginning to work the steps in order , on the Step Work Board.I have just posted the First Step, my reflections and some important questions that can be responded to in order to help work the step. Please join us with your comments. ThanksLearn How The Twelve Steps Work. http:/...

PP · PP

Just stopping in to say hello. I am home, exhausted and happy to be home. My daughter rented a car for me to drive home today..it was time for all of us to get back to our routines. Now, time for some popcorn and quiet. Hugs to all!

SpiderArcana · SpiderArcana

So, things have been good lately, but even so I'm being selfish. My husband and his family are at the fair today, and I have the house and the day aaaaaaall to myself. I feel a little bad because it's raining, and his allergies were making him feel miserable (well, that was his excuse anyway). But, you kn...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Well no court date, nothing new, same ol' same ol' pretty much. The kids are headed back to school and my girl is officially driving us everywhere. She passed her driver's ed class and is thrilled to be in the drivers seat. I'm very proud of her .. :) she is a GREAT driver and is doing sooo good. Yester...

likemyheart · likemyheart

Where to start? My mom has bladder cancer, just diagnosed, not even sure the path they are going to want her to take. My cat died, she was 12 years old and I find myself arguing with someone who says, she wasnt that old.. why am I even trying with those type of people? Cats live as long as they live eh? And my do...

lookingup · lookingup

Abf was trying to get me back ,calls,texts,dropping in unexpectedly.etc.i finally talked to him. He just wanted to hold me tight and not let go.said he had to be with me everyday.he is back to himself doing better than ever,scary,I was on my road to recovery for sure was not expecting this to happen.he...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Ok .. I think I know the answer for my situation however I am looking for some perspectives .. I am going to go off fully loaded if we have ANY more issues with this. If I do this there will be supervised visits going forward. My STBX "forgets" what he has on his phone. My son who is 10, I'm an on...

lookingup · lookingup

What would be my self are when it comes to abf,what should I allow and what I should not allow.what are or would be manipulates that abf uses?,and what are enablers that I could be useing to my abf?when should I speak up for what I believe in?how do I take cate of me weather he is drinking or not drinking or us...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

Hi All. 3 years ago I had something happen with a guy that brought me back a lot character assassination. But I did not respond to it because I knew I had a part in it and had hurt him. Maybe when it got too big I should have set a boundary, I don't know. A lot of people used it to inate their egos (including my own...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

I am really sad about Robin Williams. I have noticed in the news how they keep saying "If you know someone with depression, there is help! Here's how to get it!" Well, that's all fine and dandy IF the person WANTS help! I know the media probably means well, I get it. But it just made me think abou...

Tampa · Tampa

Todays Spiritual Study will be: Taking A BreakMeeting scheduled in the Al-Anon chat room. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html . There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the server we are on is irc.chat4al...

blessed · blessed

http://moregreatminds.com/8-ways-to-protect-yourself-from-emotional-manipulation/

Robean · Robean

Hi, all. New to online forum, have been going to Al-Anon since September of last year. I love my home group, but have been wanting to expand my support network to include some online resources. Did my reading today, and this particular line really struck me: "Does the voice of God have a chance to...

hope4ever · hope4ever

I have really been struggling lately. I have a real problem with intimacy and I push my husband away a lot. Even when he tries to hold my hand I don't want to. I find it easier to push him away than embracing his love for me. I have been getting very critical with him and analyzing everything he says and doe...

texasgal · texasgal

So far so good with my job . I had an issue with on of my friends. She has been dating a man who is a user. She has been borrowing money from our other friends. So far she has paid everyone back I only lent her one time a year ago and told her never to ask me again I do not like to mix friendships or family with money ....

furneem · furneem

Hi All, I am the wife of an in denial alcoholic. I spend my days worrying he has been drinking and he seems to spend his days covering up that he has been drinking His family sat him down last week in a kind of intervention and all was ok for a few days. I have been away and come back today and within 3 hours we w...

missmeliss · missmeliss

It is crunch time. Our agreed moving date approaches. ABF is trying the meek, mild, "butter wouldn't melt in his mouth and he doesn't know why I am so cold and distant but since we are forever and ever, he'll wait, and turn the other cheek if I fail to kiss the first one" approach. (That's a thin...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Acceptance ? No way. (Preview) I am new to all this, attended my first Al-anon meeting last week, my second meeting just last evening. One of the common themes members talk about is learning to accept our loved ones disease and realize we can't fix them. I am going to be frankly honest and strongly disagree with that thinking. I...	Cooper	21	785	Aug 22, 2014 by WorkingThroughIt
	Green Car .. (Preview) LOL .. I KNEW this was going to happen .. he showed up in the green car and I had set a boundary that while the car was NOT in his name he would NOT be driving the kids around in it. I'm sorry ... someone else's car and I don't know this person and so on. So I laughed to myself .. as I walked out before the kids did...	SerenityRUS	14	475	Aug 22, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Cathy? Update please. (Preview) We haven't heard anything since yesterday. Are you doing okay?	grateful2be	5	374	Aug 22, 2014 by tiredtonite
	Halt (Preview) I'm hungry,angry,lonesome,and tired ,what next?ive been cooking cooked a great supper abf has been sick with cold but eating like a horse,he said he was feeling better this morning,little if any contact with him,he lies in bed for most part.i guess all the pills he is taking to get better has him tire...	lookingup	3	281	Aug 22, 2014 by Jerry F
	weird memory (Preview) My dear neighbor texted me today if I had seen her 15 year old dog Ginger. Gin has been coming to my place for 14 years, a yellow lab. We share her. (c: They gave up paying someone to watch their house and her as she would just come to me. One night late I get the is Ginger there call. We were out with flashlight...	Debilyn	4	381	Aug 21, 2014 by Jerry F
	when someone shows you who they are believe it! (Preview) With alchoholics not in recovery they become very many people, thats my experience anyway, my problem is trying to make them into just one personality, one that suits me, pointing out someone elses short falls or highlighting thier traits is not nice and very cruel I have done that, trying to gently g...	Katy	8	425	Aug 21, 2014 by blessed
	Needing to vent (Preview) Sorry,but I'm needing to vent ,abf mistress or whatever she is called his cell ph I went ballistic ,abf swore up and down that he hadnt talked to her or anything in weeks,he said he was selling his phone tomorrow but I think he is haveing to sell it for money to get to work I dunno,I'm still upset about it a...	lookingup	4	285	Aug 21, 2014 by PP
	Need help sorting through the yuck! (Preview) I am trying to sort through some issues. One that is not settling no matter how much I pray and continue to tell myself it's just not my business. I have come to find out that A got involved with a female counsellor at detox centre and has gone away with her overnight and continued to carry on a relationship...	Mari1978	10	568	Aug 21, 2014 by Sweet Stanley
	I am trying my best not to have a serious meltdown (Preview) Hi. I am feeling so overwhelmed, lonely and worried. My second child is off to college. I know it's a good thing. But now it's only me and my youngest 8 yr old at home. I am trying very very hard to look at the good things. youngest child just put her stuff in older sister's closet and drawers. It was cute, and...	Newlife girl	7	388	Aug 21, 2014 by grateful2be
	Peaks and valleys big time..... (Preview) Sooo the last 6 months I have fallen in love, my sponsor died, got to go to Texas, I broke my right arm, my car died and I had to buy a new one, the newer car is in the shop and needs a new transmission after owning it 90 days, I have had some amazing weekends with the new boyfriend and our kids, I am working my pr...	Breakingfree	15	596	Aug 21, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	Why I drank (Preview) This is a poem I came across in AA meetings. I posted it on the AA boards but I thought some of you might like to read it cuz this is what you see going on right in front your your face. It sort of helps to understand alcoholism I guess. For most alcoholics these things are all on different continuums and on...	pinkchip	19	935	Aug 21, 2014 by Newlife girl
	why is the man and the disease seperate? (Preview) Someone mentioned this lately that the man is seperate from the disease. Im not sure I get it. When the man is drunk, hes still the man, when hes sober hes still a sober sick man so what part is the man? being sober doesnt make him a different man surely. I mean how would you even know the man if hes being an a...	el-cee	21	700	Aug 21, 2014 by SunshineGirl
	Another night of anxiety & no sleep- my story. (Preview) Hi there. this is my first time posting here, tho I've been accessing sign hire for a while. My AH is my husband of 8yrs, been together 15. He was always a big drinker, I didn't really think much of it when we first met as we were both young & enjoyed the party scene. It's only since we've had the kids &...	Tash2	16	637	Aug 20, 2014 by Marie212
	Dating (Preview) I am wondering what the protocol is for dating another al anon member. I have been single for 5 years and feel ready to date. There is a man in a meeting I attend who is age appropriate and emotionally available.	Amg70	5	825	Aug 20, 2014 by blessed
	Feeling Lonely and Anxious (Preview) Hi Everyone, I just needed to connect with people who probably can identify with the way I am feeling right now. As some of you know who read my previous post several days ago, I have broken up with my ABF. I have to live in his home for the next 6 weeks. I am still waiting to hear whether I have gotten the a...	AshleyA	2	331	Aug 20, 2014 by grateful2be
	why I have gone back home. (Preview) I never learn things quickly and I have to do them over and over until they sink in, I suppose I am just needing to touch the hot stove again, my husband was a big drinker when we first met, I think i had one year with him before he fianally stopped and within that year I had found alanon and so began the unrave...	Katy	3	400	Aug 20, 2014 by PP
	Sobriety - a choice or not? (Preview) Why would someone who admits they are an alcoholic, who achieved sobriety for 10 years after almost dying, continue to regularly drink after their first relapse 4 years ago? This is on and off. He has apparently had periods where he has stayed sober for 6 months, but in the 18 months I've known him he h...	Flossy	11	679	Aug 20, 2014 by Mattie
	I've realized why I'm single! (Preview) I used to think, when I wasn't in a relationship, that I was single because: I wasn't good enough for a relationship. No one would find me appealing or worthwhile. I didn't deserve to be in a relationship. I was just a loser and everyone could tell. But I'm single right now and I suddenly realized why! I'...	Mattie	18	726	Aug 20, 2014 by Cooper
	I was praying for rain (Preview) You know I was always praying for rain and today HP answered me BIG TIME. Phoenix got hit so hard I thought it was going to wash away. Up here in New River we got 4 1/2 inches in about a hour. The streets were being scraped but the mud and rock is everywhere. Coming down a street to get home is a dip through a...	Cathyinaz	8	493	Aug 20, 2014 by bud
	Another step (Preview) I am always amazed at how my HP works. This week was quite eventful, so I apologize if this is a little long. My AH and I have been separated since January & we were separated 5 months last year. I had hope that he had hit his bottom and would seek help this go around. He almost crashed and killed our 6...	Tossed Salad	9	342	Aug 19, 2014 by Tossed Salad
	Needing a sponser (Preview) I'm needing a onser to help me with my step work,I'm been trying to do them all by myself but I was told that I can't do them by myself.anybody here want to volunteer for the job ?thanks	lookingup	14	610	Aug 19, 2014 by PP
	How to handle ABF who has been talking the talk about treatment without going "co" / how to talk to his friend? (Preview) My second query to the forum, shortly after the first. That one will give you background. My ABF and I had a "come to jesus" moment six weeks ago after he was arrested for drunk& disorderly on the Fourth and he kept drinking 36+ hours after being released from jail. I wasn't directly im...	nichtdaisy	6	524	Aug 19, 2014 by nichtdaisy
	Thankful (Preview) Particularly thankful for the gift of Al-anon today. Because of what I have learnt and practised, I was able to detach with love and remove myself from the crisis that my AH was busy trying to create to drink at. I saw it for what it was, his stuff not mine. I declined his invitation to a fight and pit...	SunshineGirl	10	412	Aug 19, 2014 by SunshineGirl
	thankful for program (Preview) My friend has dug herself in deeper she borrowed another $500 this weekend from a coworker and continues to lie for everything. I have blocked her number from my phone. I know she is miserable but I have to draw the line somewhere. I'm grateful for learning abt boundaries and when to separate myself fro...	texasgal	6	273	Aug 19, 2014 by PP
	so why didn't he.... (Preview) I have shared all over fb this, If someone has a life saving rope to help them, if they have a broken arm, they can do nothing to save themselves. Depression, Addiction, mental illness, your brain is broken, compromised. It cannot think correctly. How does anyone not get that? if one drinks his brain is...	Debilyn	8	620	Aug 19, 2014 by Breakingfree
	shove me into shallow water before I get too deep.... (Preview) OMGosh, I just realized something. It really hit me. HE called me today. The man I loved and love, liked. I still like him. He sends me an email off and on sharing some important event. (throwing me scraps?) Then months go by. I don't email him much. Its like why bother and he is married......still........	Debilyn	18	6728	Aug 19, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Courage needed (Preview) I will need courage to fight my dry ah on selling our property. He thought it was a slam dunk of paper changing hands only till my lawyer looked at tax returns and said there is no way either of you can afford to pay that mtg Alone. He finally got his copy of letter this weekend. I am very nervous. I have an appr...	Mirandac	13	551	Aug 19, 2014 by Breakingfree
	This is getting old. (Preview) S -- Edited by missmeliss on Tuesday 19th of August 2014 02:33:07 AM	missmeliss	18	712	Aug 19, 2014 by pinkchip
	I thought I would be able to go on my holidays without needing to write a thread before departing... (Preview) So, we all have been off work/school for 7 days now. I have to say that surprisingly it was a very good week indeed. I was dreading it if I am honest. Husband drank moderately and behaved well through out the week. He did activities with daughter from his own initiative and was more than happy looking afte...	Luiza	9	516	Aug 19, 2014 by el-cee
	Update! (Preview) Hello Mip so after spending a few weeks away from home and I started to feel I needed to bring some things to a close, I have been lucky that my husband has remained friendly and loving in my absence and allowed me to come and go freely without obstruction or control, however he has not asked me about anyth...	Katy	5	359	Aug 18, 2014 by PP
	Giving Back (Preview) now is an often thing, a usual thing and a natural practice. How would I have ever thought it would have come to this as a milestone in my own recovery. I came in to Al-Anon "all buss up" as we say in pigeon...I came in pupule or in translation, crazy. I was angry and rageful and uncaring ab...	Jerry F	10	547	Aug 18, 2014 by DavidG
	AA and Al-Anon Convention this Weekend. (Preview) Hi Everyone! So I ended up going to the convention and had a wonderful time. Got my cup full of great speakers and E/S/H. Amazingly enough because once again I decided to adjust my attitude and my mouth it went well with my AH. We talked and laughed and cried together. There was no pettiness, arguing noth...	Flower49	5	410	Aug 18, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	A peaceful day (Preview) Today went smooth ,my abf joined me at my friends house for grilling out,it was great,I enjoyed myself my abf was looking through his phone as usualcand I walked over to look too he closed it ,I told him that he wasn't right he said plz don't start let's not start,I can start drama with him cause of my resen...	lookingup	24	706	Aug 18, 2014 by lookingup
	Just what I needed...lol (Preview) Lol, so, my daughter is "Art Captain" at her school. She's quite a talented little drawer and painter like her father (I can string words together but my visual art is abysmal, even my stick-figures suck). So last night she mentions to me, "mum, I have completed all of the "art ta...	missmeliss	7	372	Aug 18, 2014 by Breakingfree
	Can't seem to let go... (Preview) Hi everybody. I'm new to this forum, and I'm new to Al-Anon. I've been to two meetings, and with my hectic schedule I plan to attend more. I need all the support I can get. And I need help, I'm willing to do anything. It's nice to be in the presence of people who understand. My alcoholic is my husband of 6 yea...	hope6147	10	776	Aug 18, 2014 by hope6147
	Two Ppl, Two Programs...right? engaged recovery anxiety conversation feelings step work (Preview) Hi there! I'm struggling with a situation which I think boils down to setting healthy boundaries in a relationship, along with keeping my nose in my own business. Looking for some E/H/S on this... I'm engaged to my AF, and my sponsor has been amazing at guiding me through my Al-Anon program. My AF is in h...	Advocate_For_Steve	5	7738	Aug 18, 2014 by maryjane
	Crazy Making! (Preview) It happened again yesterday, it's insane. Is he intentionally trying to crazy make?! I was heading to a friends babies 1st birthday party yesterday when out of the blue (ex)ABF sends me a message saying he was at an AA meeting. Now I've not known him to attend a Saturday morning meeting EVER in the 18...	Flossy	17	698	Aug 18, 2014 by pinkchip
	Feeling hopeful (Preview) Hi everyone After my pretty desperate post earlier this week, I wanted to share that I'm feeling more hopeful today! Not of my AH not drinking anymore (let go of that a while ago) but of my ability to manage my reactions better. Don't get me wrong, I know I still have a really long way to go, & I expect se...	Tash2	3	361	Aug 18, 2014 by PP
	Itchy Skin (Preview) Has anyone come across their As having itchy skin? My (ex)ABF has had this thing for the past year where he constantly scratches his side overnight, to the extent that it wakes me up. He doesn't even know he's doing it. I've said to him about it and he claims it's to do with my cats but he's also done it wh...	Flossy	11	519	Aug 18, 2014 by Mattie
	today I matter (Preview) Hi All, I have been to an AA convention today with Al anon participation. My ABf is active again after two years sobriety. I stuck to my boundary after he stayed out over night and he moved out. I can not believe how much I have changed, I have detached and I am grabbing on to al anon with both hands. Meeti...	Tracy	9	440	Aug 18, 2014 by SunshineGirl
	Live and Let Live (Preview) Today, I got to practice LIVE, AND LET LIVE. I was home for lunch, with my son, and a knock on the door. My son answered and I hear him ask for my AH. My son said he wasn't here.... Anyway, it turns out it is a man here to mow our yard. Seriously! lol! They measure our lawns in square feet; not acres. He has only...	blessed	8	676	Aug 18, 2014 by michaelwriting
	Stepping out helps (Preview) I've been drifting down a bit recently and then I had a wonderful day out with friends and I can't tell you how much that has raised my spirits. It is so easy to stay at home here but being with others really is important for me. In the morning I went and had coffee with a girlfriend and her family. She had m...	milkwood	6	298	Aug 17, 2014 by Jerry F
	Again and again (Preview) The other woman that my abf said he did not cheat on me sent my abf a text to his phone two days- ago text said ....I love you. I had asked my abf to look at his icons on his ph. And I saw a messenger icon so I opened it up and to my surprise there she was agin.abf said he hadn't a clue that was there he then opened up th...	lookingup	10	530	Aug 17, 2014 by Mattie
	First Step (Preview) We are once again beginning to work the steps in order , on the Step Work Board.I have just posted the First Step, my reflections and some important questions that can be responded to in order to help work the step. Please join us with your comments. ThanksLearn How The Twelve Steps Work. http:/...	hotrod	0	234	Aug 17, 2014 by hotrod
	A quick hello (Preview) Just stopping in to say hello. I am home, exhausted and happy to be home. My daughter rented a car for me to drive home today..it was time for all of us to get back to our routines. Now, time for some popcorn and quiet. Hugs to all!	PP	9	445	Aug 17, 2014 by PP
	Guilty pleasure (Preview) So, things have been good lately, but even so I'm being selfish. My husband and his family are at the fair today, and I have the house and the day aaaaaaall to myself. I feel a little bad because it's raining, and his allergies were making him feel miserable (well, that was his excuse anyway). But, you kn...	SpiderArcana	2	237	Aug 17, 2014 by hotrod
	Still in the throws .. :) (Preview) Well no court date, nothing new, same ol' same ol' pretty much. The kids are headed back to school and my girl is officially driving us everywhere. She passed her driver's ed class and is thrilled to be in the drivers seat. I'm very proud of her .. :) she is a GREAT driver and is doing sooo good. Yester...	SerenityRUS	11	431	Aug 17, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	It is what it is (Preview) Where to start? My mom has bladder cancer, just diagnosed, not even sure the path they are going to want her to take. My cat died, she was 12 years old and I find myself arguing with someone who says, she wasnt that old.. why am I even trying with those type of people? Cats live as long as they live eh? And my do...	likemyheart	9	608	Aug 17, 2014 by Debilyn
	Given in (Preview) Abf was trying to get me back ,calls,texts,dropping in unexpectedly.etc.i finally talked to him. He just wanted to hold me tight and not let go.said he had to be with me everyday.he is back to himself doing better than ever,scary,I was on my road to recovery for sure was not expecting this to happen.he...	lookingup	7	364	Aug 17, 2014 by Debilyn
	Porn and Kids .. (Preview) Ok .. I think I know the answer for my situation however I am looking for some perspectives .. I am going to go off fully loaded if we have ANY more issues with this. If I do this there will be supervised visits going forward. My STBX "forgets" what he has on his phone. My son who is 10, I'm an on...	SerenityRUS	8	699	Aug 17, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Takeing care of ME (Preview) What would be my self are when it comes to abf,what should I allow and what I should not allow.what are or would be manipulates that abf uses?,and what are enablers that I could be useing to my abf?when should I speak up for what I believe in?how do I take cate of me weather he is drinking or not drinking or us...	lookingup	8	496	Aug 17, 2014 by milkwood
	Malicious Gossip (Preview) Hi All. 3 years ago I had something happen with a guy that brought me back a lot character assassination. But I did not respond to it because I knew I had a part in it and had hurt him. Maybe when it got too big I should have set a boundary, I don't know. A lot of people used it to inate their egos (including my own...	WorkingThroughIt	12	884	Aug 17, 2014 by el-cee
	The media and depression (Preview) I am really sad about Robin Williams. I have noticed in the news how they keep saying "If you know someone with depression, there is help! Here's how to get it!" Well, that's all fine and dandy IF the person WANTS help! I know the media probably means well, I get it. But it just made me think abou...	Newlife girl	9	816	Aug 17, 2014 by blessed
	Today’s Spiritual Study will be: Taking A Break (Preview) Todays Spiritual Study will be: Taking A BreakMeeting scheduled in the Al-Anon chat room. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html . There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the server we are on is irc.chat4al...	Tampa	0	174	Aug 17, 2014 by Tampa
	Emotional Manipulation (Preview) http://moregreatminds.com/8-ways-to-protect-yourself-from-emotional-manipulation/	blessed	10	1430	Aug 17, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	"One Day at a Time in Al-Anon: August 16 was written for me." (Preview) Hi, all. New to online forum, have been going to Al-Anon since September of last year. I love my home group, but have been wanting to expand my support network to include some online resources. Did my reading today, and this particular line really struck me: "Does the voice of God have a chance to...	Robean	4	423	Aug 16, 2014 by Jerry F
	Intimacy in relationships (Preview) I have really been struggling lately. I have a real problem with intimacy and I push my husband away a lot. Even when he tries to hold my hand I don't want to. I find it easier to push him away than embracing his love for me. I have been getting very critical with him and analyzing everything he says and doe...	hope4ever	6	654	Aug 16, 2014 by pinkchip
	enabling? (Preview) So far so good with my job . I had an issue with on of my friends. She has been dating a man who is a user. She has been borrowing money from our other friends. So far she has paid everyone back I only lent her one time a year ago and told her never to ask me again I do not like to mix friendships or family with money ....	texasgal	6	528	Aug 16, 2014 by el-cee
	Feeling lost (Preview) Hi All, I am the wife of an in denial alcoholic. I spend my days worrying he has been drinking and he seems to spend his days covering up that he has been drinking His family sat him down last week in a kind of intervention and all was ok for a few days. I have been away and come back today and within 3 hours we w...	furneem	10	690	Aug 16, 2014 by Kelly123
	If I'm honest with mself. (Preview) It is crunch time. Our agreed moving date approaches. ABF is trying the meek, mild, "butter wouldn't melt in his mouth and he doesn't know why I am so cold and distant but since we are forever and ever, he'll wait, and turn the other cheek if I fail to kiss the first one" approach. (That's a thin...	missmeliss	17	527	Aug 15, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.