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Sunday Morning MIP Chat room Spiritual Meeting
(Preview)
I'm BACKkkkkk! I will be doing the Sunday morning Spiritual Meetings again, we will just wing it this morning; but starting next Sunday morning I should have my scripts back up and running (I hope) and we will start on Chapter 3, of Having had a Spiritual Awaking; which to the best of my knowledge is wher...
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Overcome
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0
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219
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Suicide, Mental Hospital, and Alcoholics
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I am new here and am joining after a very hard week. As a bit of background, my husband has a sister and mother who are alcoholics and they live several states away. His sister has a niece who we are now caring for. I will call her Suzy for sake of anonymnimity. Suzy has been abused all of he...
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enonymous
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11
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592
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Re: Told I'm game playing
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
I'm pretty new to MIP. I've been working hard on Step 1 and Step 2 but I keep running into the same problem with my active alcoholic partner that he is getting angry with me making changes to how I relate to him in our relationship and he keeps saying that I am just game playing. How do I get him to take what I am...
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rainbow
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40
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2465
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The fun begins.
(Preview)
Parents came today to help me patch up the damage here, pack stuff, nothing has worked out in any way house-wise so, daughter and I are moving in with them for lack of any alternatives whatsoever. It's not an outcome I would have asked for. Ever. Of course I am grateful that we have a safe place to go but it i...
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missmeliss
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11
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625
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My old girl got bit!
(Preview)
Daisy, our oldest dog, was bit by our neighbor's dog on Friday. We just moved to a new house, and have already had problems with one of their dogs, Coda. Coda is old, and has very bad hip dysplasia and should last another 6 months. or so. But in the meantime she's on steroids and oxycodone, and is stoned...
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KennyFenderjazz
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30
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918
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I miss Tom.
(Preview)
I clicked on a new thread and saw his picture came up and I was so excited. And Maresie and Jen and another one or two I remember from back in the day. Thom was such a help to so many. It was a comfort every time he posted. It was a comfort once when he removed one of my posts, just to know he was watching. I won...
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Temple
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7
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408
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Pushy Sponsors
(Preview)
Hi again, I have just got a sponsor, but did not pick her she asked me if I would like her to be my sponsor and because we drive to the meetings together I thought why not. Now that she is my sponsor she has turned in to a very pushy person and is always asking me about my husband who is the alcoholic. She is tr...
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Bothered
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8
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1132
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He bonded himself out
(Preview)
Yesterday he bonded himself out of jail by putting his car title up bond was set at 500 bondsman dropped him off at my driveway he came walking in scared me to death took me by surprise he always has tricks up his sleeve which is scary I've always called him the master mind he can figure out anything and I me...
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lookingup
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7
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529
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Resentment, honesty, and fear
(Preview)
Hi all, I've been working through Blueprint for Recovery as part of my 4th step. It's such a great, eye-opening exercise to address all these topics--from money, to intimacy, to responsibilities--and to literally take an inventory. I've found so much good in myself, and also so many areas that need...
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NL14
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15
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1012
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Holy crap, how did we get here?
(Preview)
i haven't been here in awhile, but I'd still been using the AlAnon tools. Looking after myself, not getting involved in anything that made the crazy-brain start, letting go. Usual stuff, and things were going well. On Monday, my AH looked me in the face and said, 'I'm done. No more drinking.' I was...
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SpiderArcana
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4
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331
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Heartbroken
(Preview)
I wrote my AH a letter today. I have not been able to talk to him. He's never sober anymore. I have to make a boundary. This has been very hard for me. I found out (looked at phone records) that he is still communicating with other woman. This makes me so sad. Just had our anniversary a week ago. I tho...
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Hullibee
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32
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715
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Sarcasm, silencing, shunning, scorn
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1 2
)
(Preview)
Recently, I spent some time with some folks who I've known for a long while. My experience with most of them was a pleasant one. One of the group, however, uses sarcasm to express scorn, attempts to silence or tunes out to what is being said for reasons of his own. I can only wonder if alcoholism has pl...
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grateful2be
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46
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1265
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Kids.. dos and donts
(Preview)
I am very new to this program, so I am just starting to learn. I have been listening to the alanon speakers on YouTube, reading books, going to f2f and MIP. So I am really getting confused as to what is the right behavior towards them and where my responsibility ends. Is there a good book or another source t...
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Venera
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6
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477
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He is all packed up.
(Preview)
STBX has no place to go to, but he is packing everything up. All the plates, cutlery, pots and pans...cups and glasses...I don't know how I am going to use the kitchen tomorrow. I really don't have time (and money) to go and buy a whole household stuff but I will have to sort something out immediately. Tha...
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Luiza
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17
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628
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Working things out (in my mind .. LOL)
(Preview)
Not with him .. LOL! I just wanted to clarify that part of the deal. I'm so grateful I know I would not go back if I was paid to go back. That decision has been solidified in my mind, heart and soul. I would never want to go back to that kind of abuse again. I have really positive news I will have to wait to s...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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499
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Scared out of wits
(Preview)
As you prolly have figured out by me not posting in such a long time and being the ultimate codependent that I am that yes I did take x ab back into my home,now to fill y'all in on the rest of what's happened bf went to work so he said stayed gone out of town for 2days would call me one time a day to say hi and that th...
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lookingup
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11
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623
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why can't I just do what I want?(sorry long)
(Preview)
Well the need for attention is not present today...I am just grateful for friends & family & how much I need them & they need me. I am often asked for my opinion & it really matters to people. I don't have to put on "airs" anymore. The program has taught me how to better deal w/ p...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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517
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What he says hurts
(Preview)
I still need to grow a thicker skin. AH has a tone of voice with me that's hard to hear. He just can't be polite and civil. he hangs up on me a lot even when I am just talking about daughter and her schedule. So I asked him to please sound better in front of daughter and he says "why do you suddenly want to be...
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Newlife girl
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8
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502
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I wonder if this has ever happened.
(Preview)
I never did climb on DDH about his drinking back in the day, because he didn't do it very often for the longest time, and when he did, he was able to drive well enough to fool me, and he was very happy and wasn't abusive and I didn't realize for 14 years that he was an alcoholic. (Duh) A few times I did try to exp...
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Temple
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20
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531
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If we teach people how to treat us, I'm satified with how I responded this week anyway
(Preview)
I've been having some interesting experiences this week that tested my boundaries and worth. I've been assigned to a new team at work. Two members on the team well.. there is no other way to say it but than to just say it.. each of them is their own universe. One of them is the head of the team and enjoys em...
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tiredtonite
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5
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403
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Having trouble with a terrible defect
(Preview)
I'm struggling with this and don't know which program tools to use to dig myself out of this hole. I'm so overwhelmed I can't see straight and would appreciate some ESH. Because my XAH is so incapable, raising our child has fallen to me. My XAH pays no childcare (I might be able to get a court order for a s...
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Mattie
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13
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523
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"He who would have beautiful roses in his garden must have beautiful roses in his heart"
(Preview)
Love this quote really helped me today hope it helps you too. :)
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Sean_82
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4
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505
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Confused I want to leave him but have doubts
(Preview)
My husband is alcholic who is in denial..... I'm tired angry and soooo confused. How have I let him control my everything when his sad I'm sad when he is happy im happy and im scared of the damage to our girls mentally emotionally I want to scream and shout and walk out with my girls and never see him again bu...
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No more
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7
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581
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Ok So I am New Here....
(Preview)
Hello All! I am new to this site and wanted to introduce myself. I am the mom of three awesome little men, and currently married to an alcoholic. I have finally reached a point where I really do not know what to do any more. I can no longer continue in the cycle and hear the lies and deal with the broken promis...
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Courtney
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9
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467
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guilt about divorce
(Preview)
UGH--last night my AH and I met with a lawyer--trying to move forward amicably which is a relief (as long as he doesn't suddenly go back on his word or change his mind). My AH cried and was really upset...I have been focusing SO much on how he is cleaning me out financially (I'm the one who makes literally A...
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sookie
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11
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717
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Help and Advice Needed
(Preview)
Hey all, lately I have gotten calls from family members on wanting to know how to stop or how to manage their loved one's disease or how to "take care" of a loved one that is coming from recovery treatment. Usually I can suggest going to a meeting or two with me, or refer to them to this board. My A...
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Flower49
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1
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222
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You know when ..
(Preview)
You know when you think ok .. this is ok it's going to get better and everything is fine. Apparently I have some lessons to learn in that area because Verna's post about not being mad got me thinking .. LOL .. Ohhh I'm angry today. It's ok because it's going to pass, .. I kind of think I'm more afraid than I a...
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SerenityRUS
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14
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571
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Rant. Should really stop the habit of helping/rescuing people.
(Preview)
So I have this neighbour who used to be my client. She is a bit helpless and I am used to help her a lot with pretty much every aspect of her life, however she is seldom "there" for me, lets me down a lot...that is fine. She is a lovely person and I like her a lot, I know she is disorganised and all over...
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Luiza
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7
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556
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Don't should on me... my rant!
(Preview)
I am unsure why this bothers me and I know to take what I like and leave the rest. I am trying to go back and read and catch up, I am seeing lots of advice giving and shoulding on people. I am pretty sure I have learned a lot in my years of al-anon and a big lesson was if I had it all figured out I wouldn't be here in th...
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Breakingfree
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12
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738
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If you could...
(Preview)
If you could recommend only 1 book... which would it be?
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deramam
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12
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571
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back on the recovery wagon.
(Preview)
well. Its been a mental weekend. Complete with a messy house which I hate and find so much harder to clean with an emotional hangover. Today I have finally worked out the est time conversion for online meetings,now that I have replaced my phone. The old one died after I threw it at the ground because my co...
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aquamom23
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8
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507
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"Just for today I will try to live through this day only, not tackle all my probelms at once."
(Preview)
Hi all I had a terrible morning of self doubt and worry about where my life and marriage would go, but after reading this "Just for today I will try to live through this day only, not tackle all my problems at once." I realise that I had fallen into a deep dark hole, it can often happen so quickly t...
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Sean_82
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8
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501
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right or wrong?
(Preview)
My exah has had a bad accident and is basically disabled and housebound for the next few months. So, my kids have actually made me very proud,they have been taking turns in looking after him. Anyway, I decided to phone him and tell him im thinking of him and if I can help to phone me. My kids have been gettin...
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el-cee
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32
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822
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Brand new to it all...
(Preview)
My fiance has a drinking problem. He will admit it but thats as far as he will go. He says he wants help, but he says he has it under control. I love him very much. We have been together for a year and a half, and plan to marry next spring. I just dont know how to feel, what to say or do. He has lost jobs and hides it w...
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shellbell77
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3
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221
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How do I Leave Him?
(Preview)
I have been married to my AH husband for almost 20 years. I have known for a long time that it will not work...I can't fix him. And he doesn't want to fix himself. Of course the problem that is killing me is "How do I leave this man I love so much?". I have been protecting him. And all that seems to ha...
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kris4242
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23
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659
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I guess I just want attenion...
(Preview)
I am struggling today w/ the fact that I just want attention. Sometimes I feel like a spoiled brat that doesn't get her way. I am old enough now that I shouldn't suffer from this malady or make others suffer either. So, I beg for extra attention on here to. I want you all to listen to be & make me feel bett...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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420
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Dwi... Please some good thoughts!((
(Preview)
Got a phone call from jail last night from my husband asking to get him. He was asking me to go get him and he was acting mad at me. I actually went there with a baby at 1am (didn't want to do it the next say and miss job). But the officer told me that his bond amount wasn't released and I couldn't take him yet, so I...
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Venera
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14
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3156
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This is a moan about A and his behaviour in our final days. Sorry, some whinging and sarcasm contained within...
(Preview)
So this really is it. 2 weeks to be out of here. A keeps trying to hook me into finding a place for all of us to live...but in essence he is behaving like a 12 year old who is cross that mummy is making him move house when he doesn't wanna. There is no adult contribution whatsoever; he looks up places on the inte...
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missmeliss
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37
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686
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Moving to 3/4 way house
(Preview)
My AH called at 1030 last night to say he is moving today to the 3/4 way house, he said they "puked" him from the 1/2 way house. He will more than likely stay there for another 6 months. So he is happy. Me, I don't really care. He keeps saying we can now start doing all these things like marriage cou...
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Flower49
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11
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581
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Boundaries
(Preview)
Boundaries was a topic at this mornings MIP meeting. Boy am I glad. I am really needing it this evening. My ex-husband and my daughter's father, and his father (the alcoholic and perpetrator of sex abuse to his son) are currently on the way to my house. I have told both of them that they are NOT welcome her...
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Overcome
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10
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542
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Update on me and the going ons in my life with recovery!
(Preview)
Well school is going good, it is hard and I am struggling in one of my classes, always has to be one! My kids are doing really well in school, my oldest is getting straight A's and her best friend moved in with us for a couple months and that is going great. My 6 year old daughter is doing so much better than las...
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Breakingfree
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8
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487
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Tools to cope with verbal abuse
(Preview)
AH is upset I didn't invite him to daughters birthday party last weekend. I think that's why he is acting so awful. I posted already about bday party issues. So here comes the verbal abuse. I went to the house yesterday and texted him before I left...so he knew we were coming over so daughter could work w...
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Newlife girl
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16
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542
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feeling such freedom then depression
(Preview)
I don't understand only a few days ago I was feeling such freedom. The burden of living with an alcoholic was almost nonexistent, and today I'm feeling so depressed. Nothing has changed as far as my ah. He struggles to control it and is drinking about 1/4 of what he used to. This depression seems to have s...
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cloudyskies
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21
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540
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....and a house, maybe...
(Preview)
So, A is being a total, complete and utter tool. That's not really important or surprising (it's actually good, he is making it so easy to not like him. It really feels like the guy i loved and this guy are 2 completely different human beings. The one I loved is in a coma and may never come out. This parody of...
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missmeliss
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10
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498
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new here but not to the dis-ease: hi everyone.
(Preview)
Hello all, I'm new here. Funnily enough, I logged in and discovered the draft post I had written almost two weeks ago. Gee, my mind was racing and tired. I am glad I found this board, as attending face to face meetings is all but impossible for me. I have no babysitters. Its been a long long time sinc...
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aquamom23
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8
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485
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New to board - AH Relapse after 21 months
(Preview)
I used to be an active AFG member, but stopped going to meetings once I relocated to a new state. I tried a few times but was not a huge fan of how differently the meetings were run. Regardless, I'm seeking help and looking to get back into the program. My AH, who I thought had a healthy foot in recovery with o...
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Carolina_H
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6
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474
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Job!!!
(Preview)
In the furthest town from anywhere I am likely to live; couldn't be much further away really lol but it's a start and a positive sign
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missmeliss
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25
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810
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How to help ourselves...
(Preview)
Needed to come read and share a bit. Trying to do any kind of sane work within my messy head is like "___________" fill in your own ESH. It all applies. I got a call last evening from a "miracle" in recovery who I hadn't heard from for months yet had just minutes before thought of...
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Jerry F
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9
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463
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AH's sister
(Preview)
My AH's sister urgently requested we send her thousands of dollars in a check for our son's estate. He has a trust that is being set up from my AH's mother passing. We didn't know at the time that the trust would be set up by the lawyers after the estate settled. We sent her the check. We found out a couple mon...
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deramam
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4
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347
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made it through the weekend...now here goes another week!
(Preview)
So briefly, I am going to recap my weekend. I am so grateful that even though I didn't go to my reunion, I had a pretty good day. I am still seeing photos & I wish I could have been there for that(song lyrics again John Anderson). I am not sure how to take the photos. Should I be jealous or just enjoy them &a...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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226
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Breaking up and Boundaries
(Preview)
I've written to this forum a few times about my evolving situation with my ABF. We were both in denial about his alcoholism until he went on a bender, was arrested for drunk&disorderly on the 4th of July, and then kept up the drinking for another two days (we were out of touch). We don't live togeth...
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nichtdaisy
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2
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346
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old habits die hard
(Preview)
I am annoyed with myself this morning. For two nights my spouse has logged between 12-14 hrs of sleep. Friday night she had stomach problems and last night her cheeks were flushed bright red. These are signs of drinking to me. I held it in as long as I could but this morning I asked her if she was drinki...
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Lyne
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6
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367
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Need thoughts desperately about my house choices
(Preview)
Thank you everyone in advance for being patient with my ruminating over my house. I have a choice to make. It's important. Everyone I know tells me to just let the house go into foreclosure...but let me tell you my options and please tell me what you would do in my situation. AH hasn't had a job since Janu...
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Newlife girl
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27
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542
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Thoughts on distancing
(Preview)
Last week my/our relationship counsellor told me that I had 'distanced too far'. She is not a specialist in alcoholic relationships and has encouraged me to stay with AH and share our bed with him at times when, I think, I should have left. No blame, I made my own choices, but I did feel guilty and unsupp...
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milkwood
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11
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555
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Where is everyone from?
(
1 2 3
)
(Preview)
I thought it would be interesting to find out how many different countries we have on here. We can still be anonymous. I hope this question is ok to ask. I find it fascinating to hear from people across the world! Me? I've lived in California my whole life. -- Edited by Newlife girl on Wednesday 17th of S...
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Newlife girl
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89
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1770
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X AH already engaged just days after divorce
(Preview)
I am truly a walking soap opera. Seriously. Sometimes this is so unreal, my friends need proof to make sure I am not lying. This morning ( around 1am) I received a text message from my ex's phone (kindly labeled line 2), it was a response to the photo I sent him of our son in his Halloween costume we purch...
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wifetoasaint
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8
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423
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How to introduce the programme to a 7 year old?
(Preview)
STBX called early this morning from work to talk to our daughter. I put it on loudspeaker and hear him saying he will come home early straight from work. Sometimes he does and sometimes he doesn't but given yesterday's incident, I though he would so I let my daughter think he would. So she has been waitin...
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Luiza
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8
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395
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More drama from his ex
(Preview)
She's decided to show up to pay her last respects to my bf's mother. She asked to come through my bf's and her adult daughter instead of calling him directly despite having his phone number and then told his dau to tell him she wouldn't come if it would bother him or if there would be a scene lol Thank go...
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tiredtonite
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10
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554
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Big weekend :)
(Preview)
After much drama in the past few weekends and the turn over at work good grief. Nothing full time that I would be interested in at this point. I'm ok right where I am. I have said I will have to get myself back into a real job not just part time at some point. My kids do not understand how good they have had i...
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SerenityRUS
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2
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283
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STBXH will go to Al-Anon meetings...
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
He asked me to all the addresses and days/times of all the meetings I have been to, and he will go there and tell them how they ruined our family and his life by filling my head with this BS and putting me against him.
I wish I could be a fly on the wall, I really do.
Shall I give him the MIP link too?
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Luiza
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42
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845
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