Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Dave38 · Dave38

i wanna go to meeting but I have no vehicle and the closest one is about half hour away. I recentmy got into a relationship with a man I simPly adore. I met him and he was great stolen my heart right away. Then he started drinking he had always been an alcoholicjust hid when we first met. He is not violent a dis...

ladybugnessa · ladybugnessa

Good Morning All, this morning I ordered three books that my sponsors want me to have. As soon as they get here I can start working my steps. I had a nice weekend I went shopping for a dress for my son's wedding. I had brunch with a great friend who is going on vacation with us in August (like we do every...

hotrod · hotrod

Courage to Change today speaks about honoring our feelings. The reading points out that living with the disease of alcoholism many of us develop negative coping tools and that one of these tools is to ignore/ stuff our feelings and by so doing we become out of touch with our own souls. The meditation c...

Cooper · Cooper

Yesterday I got a phone call from the guy who was my best friend many years ago, he was even the best man in my wedding. I have seen him once in the last ten years at class reunion event and he was so drunk he was going from angry and belligerent one second to crying the next. He was one of the guys I was runnin...

LedfootJenny · LedfootJenny

Hi MIP, I've seen several threads lately discussing the difficulties associated with an alcoholic spouse and young children in the home. Those of us with children, will always have the alcoholic in our lives, because they are the parent to our babies. As my two approach 9 and 11 - I am looking for way...

kathleen1212 · kathleen1212

This is all new to me. My mother has been an alcoholic for my whole life, I'm 36 now. She hasn't met my children who are three and five. I've always thought I could outrun her issues but it's really been bothering me lately. I'm beginning to think that her actions are affecting my life. Will alanon hel...

missmeliss · missmeliss

She had already picked out a gift and had it put aside and has been saving to buy it. Which explains where the change from the bus money I give her every day keeps magically dissapearing to lol. So I will look forward to being pleasantly surprised and remember not to try to control the universe

I sure di...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change reading for today speaks about listening to the" still small voice within" and acting on the guidance we hear. It suggests that many times logic will tell us to act in one way and that small voice would suggest a different path. And by lowly listening and acting on the gu...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

Had to rush down to court to help ah explain his situation. I did this voluntarily. By appearing before the judge, AH was given additional fines for missing court date, 10 more comunity service,3 yr probation and a 1yr manditory domestic violence class to take. The only concession,if i told judge i fe...

LinSC · LinSC

I would love to stop saying that in my mind and take more action little by little day by day. In pursuing this frame of mind I read a great, simple but powerful phrase, it was a "Duh"! moment for me. "HOW WE SPEND OUR TIME IS HOW WE SPEND OUR LIVES" Simple enough for me, but also though...

Tara1970 · Tara1970

Hello,My Husband recently was flown to Tucson medical for what they thought was a heart attack or a stroke. We still have no idea what it was but he has always drank but now it has gotten worse and i'm having a very hard time dealing with it. we went to the doctor today he was told the alcohol is playing a...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

You know I was pretty down a month ago when I posted here but received great ESH which pulled me out of that hole. Thank you all One of the things I needed to know was my son's feeling so when I visited last I asked. Here is what he said: Mom....I have no depression or anxiety, it was mostly due to my drinking...

LoveNHope · LoveNHope

Hi, I'm a newbie at this. I have never dated anyone who has had a drug or alcohol problem. I'm 38, have my stuff together and was fixed up with someone who was in recovery for 4 mos. I have fallen head over heals for him and is the best man I have ever been with. It has not been very long that we have been togeth...

runningwife · runningwife

Hello, My husband is an alcoholic. He recently acknowledges this and has went to 1 meeting at AA (thought he says 3). He has had a drinking problem for years and I finally had enough about 5 months ago and said something. He has hidden his drinking from me for years. Hiding the bottles in the pantry, his tr...

Bean · Bean

OK, I had no idea where to turn to. I have been in a relationship for the past 9.5 years with a serious alcoholic. I have watched him medi vacked 2x, driven by ambulance, driven him, etc. etc. to detox centers only to be lied to once again -that this x it was it. I guess I am closing this book for good. He is...

John · John

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for today, March 19 stresses the importance of facing life one day at a time. It states that Al-Anon is a 24 hour program and that this gives us the comfort of knowing that we need not burden ourselves with the woes of the pastor fears of the future. Remembering that today is our sole conc...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for today speaks about the Al-Anon fourth step, bookL":Blueprint for Progress."and explained the chapter which is entitled self-worth. The meditation points out that we have probably always measured our self-worth and value by our accomplishment or what others have t...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hi All, I think that I have been making progress with detaching, with not engaging, with not arguing, and with setting boundaries. I remember some people said that my wife would probably react negatively to this at first, and I sure am seeing that now. I think, for the last few weeks, that I was just se...

el-cee · el-cee

Here in the uk there are a few different news channels, there is one that is pretty dire, like a tabloid newspaper, sensationalist and dramatic, another presents itself as serious and balanced but it skirts the issues, ignores or only just touches on the important stuff. Then there is channel 4, its l...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I am getting close to a settlement and divorce. Ah is finally getting ready to deal. He would not before hoping he could squeeze me. I am a lot stronger now and standing my ground. I was the wild card He was hoping to take advantage Of And push around. I have a good Divorce lawyer. I am still being lenient bu...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I was born like all of you in a pure, natural state, borned perfectly as God wanted me to be out of His vision for me and His love for me. I was also born into an emotionally dishonest and dysfunctional family and society. Although I cannot remember it, probably by the time I was 4, I had learned what to do in o...

4myboys · 4myboys

Today is a not so good day. I keep replaying the last few conversations me and my ah had. It's driving me insane. What if I made a mistake leaving? What if he really was trying to make things work? What if I'm wrong? Everyday I have a storm of emotions racing through me. But mostly regret. Just 3 weeks ago he d...

marska57 · marska57

I am familiar with the Al-Anon and AA principles as I have gone through this with my ex-husband-- but I need advice on how to introduce my youngest daughter (25- who I will call EM) and my (current) husband (DH) to these principles to help them cope with JM. When I was actively involved with Al-Anon I wen...

Mike B · Mike B

Good morning, New to Alanon, but not MIP. Well, the struggles of my teens(2) drug use has worn me down. I removed my daughter from my house on 1/1/2015. My sons(16) use progressed to a daily basis. The symptoms are all there: lying, isolating, anger and his world getting smaller. He can't wait for me t...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Under the topic of graduation: My committee members, time, date, and location are set, and after spending an hour with a writing tutor, I now have great (or at least better) chapter titles! Yay!

pinkchip · pinkchip

Sometimes it actually helps me to view myself as the star of my own reality show. It may sound conceited but it helps in some ways if I think: 1. This is my show so I better make it interesting. 2. Each day is a new episode and the plot can change and get better each week. 3. I'm the star and producer so I can...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Well, Monday. I remind myself first what I said about the reading this morning. I cannot expect perfection from myself, and steps in the right direction are successes. I also cannot expect perfection from my wife, and steps in the right direction, like not drinking over the weekend, are also success...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

AH CAME HOME FROM REHAB LAST NIGHT. OUR INSURANCE WOULDNT ALLOW MORE THAN 30 DAYS AND WE CANT AFFORD A FANCY PRIVATE REHAB. I FEEL KINDA STRANGE WHICH MY SPONSER SAID I WOULD. TRYING TO USE THE SKILLS/TOOLS I LEARN AT ALANON. I FEEL KINDA NUMB ABOUT HIM..MAYBE I JUST NEED SOME TIME TO SEE THAT HE IS DOING HI...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Good morning everyone. I just need to rant my ah has been sober about 100 days. Up until 2 weeks ago I has set to leave him. I went crying to our therapist and mad as heck and told her that is it. He was grumpy and mean everyday and I just couldn't take it anymore. Amazingly she met with him the next day and he cha...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Things have been so crazy busy lately, some in a good way some in a not so good way. My life feels a little like a I Love Lucy Reboot 2015 probably PG13/R version. Seriously if this hadn't happened to me I wouldn't believe it. A couple weekends ago I left my house without children in it for once and headed...

texann1 · texann1

you can't hold someone down without staying down with them.

Luiza · Luiza

So after 6 months separation and after all he put me through, exAH sends me a txt last night saying: "I miss you" Well he didn't miss me during my pregnancy when I was lonely and down all the time, worrying myself sick about our future and finances whilst he was either drinking at the pub or slee...

4myboys · 4myboys

I recently made the choice of ending my relationship with my husband of 18 years. He is an alcoholic. I feel like I have failed and given up on him. I couldn't take the drinking anymore. After all these years of everything we lost and abuse,lying,binges and worst of all constantly putting our kids in dan...

John · John

John · John

create a world of gratitude...

Skorpi · Skorpi

And today, while I was considering how my wife seems to have this desperate need to be in communication with me at all points of the day the brilliance of modern technology appeared to me. Usually, I have a chat window open with her to tell her important things like: I got to the office safe. I will be away...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Since I received my new car, A has been sending me a lot of messages, which I have been ignoring. They all basically say "I want to get a job but I can't work without a car. it sucks sucks SUCKS, life is so unfair". Now he hasn't applied for a job since he quit his old one almost a year ago....after u...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I've been busy this week, busier than I have been for years. Happy busy, I like what I am doing, my routine, and the home I relax in at night. But I have noticed that with a new busy lifestyle, and being away from my child, pets, home and comfort zone during the day, quite a few "pre-alanon" habit...

LedfootJenny · LedfootJenny

Hi everyone! I'm back into my program after an absence and relapse. My current job and health make it really challenging to get to meetings with any predictability. I understand their importance and power and continue to try to find a way to make that happen. But what I'm wondering is - in the meanti...

hotrod · hotrod

Courage to Change reading for a few days ago speaks about how our progress in Al-Anon often appears slow. It points out that if we expect all our our negative attitudes to be removed instantly,we have unrealistic expectations..The reading goes on to point out that the best way to measure our progress...

Gailsy · Gailsy

Lately I have been feeling a lot of resentments with people in my life. Those feelings are putting me in a bad place. I have been trying very hard to turn them over to God. This morning I was able to pray for the people that are the source of my resentments. I realize that they are untreated alanon people. I p...

ladybugnessa · ladybugnessa

the man actually apologized to me for losing his temper. Yay!

drywit44 · drywit44

Someone told me, I think that it was on this board but I can't be sure, that because of my wife's being a long-timer in Al an, that I am eligible, even though my family lacks any addict or abuser. I've had my own therapy for 100 years so am skeptical of my need or potential benefit from going a 12 step route. ...

pamala · pamala

I am rather new to all of this, so I was wondering if someone can explain the term "dry drunk" to me. I am hoping my 26 year old daughter stops drinking and gets her life on track, but will it just be her not drinking but still having the same issues with her? What will she have to lie about if she'...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change today speaks about progress not perfection. It reinforces the idea that Al-Anon works slowly and surely as we use the tools each day one day at a time. The reading points out that many times we have unhealthy attitudes as to how quickly we should grow and change, and become disappo...

Truth · Truth

I woke up this morning ... Read a bit sat in silence and realized I am happy where I am. I am single, a mom, love my son and my job

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

This is bold & proud! I am so grateful for everyone in my life who have been w/ me through the ups & downs. I hope that in the future there will be more ups than downs just so I can help another struggling Al anon member or anyone who has difficulties that can't deal w/them on their own. I am a prime exa...

hotrod · hotrod

Happy St. Patrick's Day to all

serenity47 · serenity47

I feel like I have I made some progress in the last few months regarding my 19 year old AD. I am practicing self care again (used to be really good at this prior to addictions entering my life). I have been reading a lot of the literature, trying to use the slogans that I find helpful and practicing detach...

CoopsMom · CoopsMom

I decided that this week I would take some steps to detach when AH calls me during the day to rant and rave about anything and everything. The way I have handled it in the past was to try to counsel him, try to help him strategize ways to deal with problems, or issues at work, I would try whatever I could to tr...

ladybugnessa · ladybugnessa

I have never called anyone from my f2f meetings. I have missed the one meeting I started at (where the woman I plan to ask to be one of my sponsors is at) for tw0 weeks due to being sick etc. I want to go tomorrow night but I will not have my car. My AH does not like the AA meeting that is held at the same tim...

LedfootJenny · LedfootJenny

Hi MIP! My AH's dad ( who is an active long time drinker) has been married for 30 years to a woman who is physically abusive. Friday night she pummeled him pretty good - apparently because he was drinking. His head is swollen and it looks like she was especially brutal. So clearly - these are two sick p...

ladybugnessa · ladybugnessa

I want to share how much peace the title of this post brings me now. every time my Idiot AH says something that I know is wrong (today it was that ZICAM makes my very bad cold worse) I say "thanks honey You may be right let me think about it" and I go on my way. all the while I'm thinking about...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Morning MIP- This reading is about how our sense of responsibility can become inflated to the point that we are resentful for all that we do (even if we are the ones insisting on doing everything!). I mentioned in an earlier post that my first experience with this feeling was as a child--I am the younge...

ladybugnessa · ladybugnessa

We had our first gaming convention this weekend. At a hotel, with a bar. Standard practice in the past was to bring his own scotch and get beer at the bar. He had not had any cravings till Friday night. Hubby had a craving for a drink after a stressful board game. I WAS not there. He does not have a s...

missmeliss · missmeliss

All has been right with my world today. I woke late (daughter is away this weekend). Did 2 assignments over coffee and then a bit of housework and then I remembered my self-care commitment so I got into the bath (believe it or not, I have been in this house for 6 weeks now yet this was STILL my FIRST BATH IN 5 Y...

Alma Daigle · Alma Daigle

There are only three people I have told about my husband's problem. I can barely admit it to myself most days. We"ll have a good stretch of time and I think, well maybe the worst is over, and then something happens and I feel upset again. Last night we were home watching TV and his eyes got red and I fel...

Flower49 · Flower49

Hi everyone, it's been sometime since I have been to the boards and I can definitely tell I have been missing you all! My Dad passed away last weekend and his funeral was Wednesday March 11, ironically that was his bday, so he got his wish that we had a party for him. I delivered his eulogy and was pleasantl...

el-cee · el-cee

Does being married or living with another person mean we have the right to insist they change, get sober, behave in a certain way? what if the mistake was ours in the first place? I mean we meet a person, build up our idea of who that person is, build our own expectations around how that person will behave,...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I don't know what to do (Preview) i wanna go to meeting but I have no vehicle and the closest one is about half hour away. I recentmy got into a relationship with a man I simPly adore. I met him and he was great stolen my heart right away. Then he started drinking he had always been an alcoholicjust hid when we first met. He is not violent a dis...	Dave38	7	614	Mar 23, 2015 by Jen61
	Happy Monday... (Preview) Good Morning All, this morning I ordered three books that my sponsors want me to have. As soon as they get here I can start working my steps. I had a nice weekend I went shopping for a dress for my son's wedding. I had brunch with a great friend who is going on vacation with us in August (like we do every...	ladybugnessa	2	476	Mar 23, 2015 by el-cee
	C2C 3-22 (Preview) Courage to Change today speaks about honoring our feelings. The reading points out that living with the disease of alcoholism many of us develop negative coping tools and that one of these tools is to ignore/ stuff our feelings and by so doing we become out of touch with our own souls. The meditation c...	hotrod	3	286	Mar 22, 2015 by ntd2001
	Asked to be a sponsor for an alcoholic (Preview) Yesterday I got a phone call from the guy who was my best friend many years ago, he was even the best man in my wedding. I have seen him once in the last ten years at class reunion event and he was so drunk he was going from angry and belligerent one second to crying the next. He was one of the guys I was runnin...	Cooper	6	684	Mar 22, 2015 by hotrod
	For those of us with young children (Preview) Hi MIP, I've seen several threads lately discussing the difficulties associated with an alcoholic spouse and young children in the home. Those of us with children, will always have the alcoholic in our lives, because they are the parent to our babies. As my two approach 9 and 11 - I am looking for way...	LedfootJenny	10	505	Mar 22, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Looking for help (Preview) This is all new to me. My mother has been an alcoholic for my whole life, I'm 36 now. She hasn't met my children who are three and five. I've always thought I could outrun her issues but it's really been bothering me lately. I'm beginning to think that her actions are affecting my life. Will alanon hel...	kathleen1212	3	361	Mar 22, 2015 by hotrod
	Plot twist. (Preview) She had already picked out a gift and had it put aside and has been saving to buy it. Which explains where the change from the bus money I give her every day keeps magically dissapearing to lol. So I will look forward to being pleasantly surprised and remember not to try to control the universe I sure di...	missmeliss	3	314	Mar 21, 2015 by DavidG
	C2C 3-21 (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for today speaks about listening to the" still small voice within" and acting on the guidance we hear. It suggests that many times logic will tell us to act in one way and that small voice would suggest a different path. And by lowly listening and acting on the gu...	hotrod	2	293	Mar 21, 2015 by hotrod
	CRAZY COURT DAY (Preview) Had to rush down to court to help ah explain his situation. I did this voluntarily. By appearing before the judge, AH was given additional fines for missing court date, 10 more comunity service,3 yr probation and a 1yr manditory domestic violence class to take. The only concession,if i told judge i fe...	YARNCRAZY	3	380	Mar 21, 2015 by hotrod
	"Someday" (Preview) I would love to stop saying that in my mind and take more action little by little day by day. In pursuing this frame of mind I read a great, simple but powerful phrase, it was a "Duh"! moment for me. "HOW WE SPEND OUR TIME IS HOW WE SPEND OUR LIVES" Simple enough for me, but also though...	LinSC	2	342	Mar 21, 2015 by ntd2001
	Hello Im new to Al-Anon (Preview) Hello,My Husband recently was flown to Tucson medical for what they thought was a heart attack or a stroke. We still have no idea what it was but he has always drank but now it has gotten worse and i'm having a very hard time dealing with it. we went to the doctor today he was told the alcohol is playing a...	Tara1970	5	2462	Mar 21, 2015 by ntd2001
	Hi Everyone (Preview) You know I was pretty down a month ago when I posted here but received great ESH which pulled me out of that hole. Thank you all One of the things I needed to know was my son's feeling so when I visited last I asked. Here is what he said: Mom....I have no depression or anxiety, it was mostly due to my drinking...	Cathyinaz	6	483	Mar 21, 2015 by ntd2001
	Fell in love w a recovered who relapsed (Preview) Hi, I'm a newbie at this. I have never dated anyone who has had a drug or alcohol problem. I'm 38, have my stuff together and was fixed up with someone who was in recovery for 4 mos. I have fallen head over heals for him and is the best man I have ever been with. It has not been very long that we have been togeth...	LoveNHope	18	804	Mar 21, 2015 by Truth
	Seeking help (Preview) Hello, My husband is an alcoholic. He recently acknowledges this and has went to 1 meeting at AA (thought he says 3). He has had a drinking problem for years and I finally had enough about 5 months ago and said something. He has hidden his drinking from me for years. Hiding the bottles in the pantry, his tr...	runningwife	5	652	Mar 21, 2015 by runningwife
	Seeking Relief (Preview) OK, I had no idea where to turn to. I have been in a relationship for the past 9.5 years with a serious alcoholic. I have watched him medi vacked 2x, driven by ambulance, driven him, etc. etc. to detox centers only to be lied to once again -that this x it was it. I guess I am closing this book for good. He is...	Bean	2	391	Mar 21, 2015 by Mirandac
	When I'm not treating my dis-ease I be like.... (Preview)	John	3	350	Mar 20, 2015 by a4l
	ODAT/ C2C 3-19 (Preview) The ODA T reading for today, March 19 stresses the importance of facing life one day at a time. It states that Al-Anon is a 24 hour program and that this gives us the comfort of knowing that we need not burden ourselves with the woes of the pastor fears of the future. Remembering that today is our sole conc...	hotrod	6	578	Mar 20, 2015 by hotrod
	C2C 3-20 (Preview) C2C reading for today speaks about the Al-Anon fourth step, bookL":Blueprint for Progress."and explained the chapter which is entitled self-worth. The meditation points out that we have probably always measured our self-worth and value by our accomplishment or what others have t...	hotrod	2	389	Mar 20, 2015 by hotrod
	Getting worse before it gets better? (Preview) Hi All, I think that I have been making progress with detaching, with not engaging, with not arguing, and with setting boundaries. I remember some people said that my wife would probably react negatively to this at first, and I sure am seeing that now. I think, for the last few weeks, that I was just se...	Skorpi	4	508	Mar 20, 2015 by Skorpi
	two tone world (Preview) Here in the uk there are a few different news channels, there is one that is pretty dire, like a tabloid newspaper, sensationalist and dramatic, another presents itself as serious and balanced but it skirts the issues, ignores or only just touches on the important stuff. Then there is channel 4, its l...	el-cee	1	261	Mar 20, 2015 by hotrod
	Getting close (Preview) I am getting close to a settlement and divorce. Ah is finally getting ready to deal. He would not before hoping he could squeeze me. I am a lot stronger now and standing my ground. I was the wild card He was hoping to take advantage Of And push around. I have a good Divorce lawyer. I am still being lenient bu...	Mirandac	8	535	Mar 20, 2015 by el-cee
	What is the "problem", really? (Preview) I was born like all of you in a pure, natural state, borned perfectly as God wanted me to be out of His vision for me and His love for me. I was also born into an emotionally dishonest and dysfunctional family and society. Although I cannot remember it, probably by the time I was 4, I had learned what to do in o...	WorkingThroughIt	4	423	Mar 20, 2015 by WorkingThroughIt
	what if? (Preview) Today is a not so good day. I keep replaying the last few conversations me and my ah had. It's driving me insane. What if I made a mistake leaving? What if he really was trying to make things work? What if I'm wrong? Everyday I have a storm of emotions racing through me. But mostly regret. Just 3 weeks ago he d...	4myboys	7	453	Mar 20, 2015 by Mattie
	My 30 yr old daughter JM is an alcoholic (Preview) I am familiar with the Al-Anon and AA principles as I have gone through this with my ex-husband-- but I need advice on how to introduce my youngest daughter (25- who I will call EM) and my (current) husband (DH) to these principles to help them cope with JM. When I was actively involved with Al-Anon I wen...	marska57	4	429	Mar 20, 2015 by WorkingThroughIt
	Teens (Preview) Good morning, New to Alanon, but not MIP. Well, the struggles of my teens(2) drug use has worn me down. I removed my daughter from my house on 1/1/2015. My sons(16) use progressed to a daily basis. The symptoms are all there: lying, isolating, anger and his world getting smaller. He can't wait for me t...	Mike B	6	699	Mar 20, 2015 by Irish7
	Success for the Day! (Preview) Under the topic of graduation: My committee members, time, date, and location are set, and after spending an hour with a writing tutor, I now have great (or at least better) chapter titles! Yay!	Skorpi	3	360	Mar 20, 2015 by ladybugnessa
	The me show (Preview) Sometimes it actually helps me to view myself as the star of my own reality show. It may sound conceited but it helps in some ways if I think: 1. This is my show so I better make it interesting. 2. Each day is a new episode and the plot can change and get better each week. 3. I'm the star and producer so I can...	pinkchip	13	586	Mar 19, 2015 by Fairlee
	THAT second shoe was unexpected... (Preview) Well, Monday. I remind myself first what I said about the reading this morning. I cannot expect perfection from myself, and steps in the right direction are successes. I also cannot expect perfection from my wife, and steps in the right direction, like not drinking over the weekend, are also success...	Skorpi	16	822	Mar 19, 2015 by Mirandac
	AH CAME HOME FROM REHAB (Preview) AH CAME HOME FROM REHAB LAST NIGHT. OUR INSURANCE WOULDNT ALLOW MORE THAN 30 DAYS AND WE CANT AFFORD A FANCY PRIVATE REHAB. I FEEL KINDA STRANGE WHICH MY SPONSER SAID I WOULD. TRYING TO USE THE SKILLS/TOOLS I LEARN AT ALANON. I FEEL KINDA NUMB ABOUT HIM..MAYBE I JUST NEED SOME TIME TO SEE THAT HE IS DOING HI...	YARNCRAZY	5	687	Mar 19, 2015 by Skorpi
	Dry drunk (Preview) Good morning everyone. I just need to rant my ah has been sober about 100 days. Up until 2 weeks ago I has set to leave him. I went crying to our therapist and mad as heck and told her that is it. He was grumpy and mean everyday and I just couldn't take it anymore. Amazingly she met with him the next day and he cha...	Helpangel	5	517	Mar 19, 2015 by hotrod
	What do I mean by having a life :) (Preview) Things have been so crazy busy lately, some in a good way some in a not so good way. My life feels a little like a I Love Lucy Reboot 2015 probably PG13/R version. Seriously if this hadn't happened to me I wouldn't believe it. A couple weekends ago I left my house without children in it for once and headed...	SerenityRUS	3	616	Mar 19, 2015 by Skorpi
	forgiveness (Preview) you can't hold someone down without staying down with them.	texann1	8	871	Mar 19, 2015 by hotrod
	I miss you…. (Preview) So after 6 months separation and after all he put me through, exAH sends me a txt last night saying: "I miss you" Well he didn't miss me during my pregnancy when I was lonely and down all the time, worrying myself sick about our future and finances whilst he was either drinking at the pub or slee...	Luiza	7	569	Mar 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	Lost (Preview) I recently made the choice of ending my relationship with my husband of 18 years. He is an alcoholic. I feel like I have failed and given up on him. I couldn't take the drinking anymore. After all these years of everything we lost and abuse,lying,binges and worst of all constantly putting our kids in dan...	4myboys	12	703	Mar 18, 2015 by Jaclyn
	News Flash!! (Preview)	John	2	414	Mar 18, 2015 by el-cee
	Combine all the goodies in your life... (Preview) create a world of gratitude...	John	1	343	Mar 18, 2015 by hotrod
	Newsflash to Myself (Preview) And today, while I was considering how my wife seems to have this desperate need to be in communication with me at all points of the day the brilliance of modern technology appeared to me. Usually, I have a chat window open with her to tell her important things like: I got to the office safe. I will be away...	Skorpi	3	403	Mar 18, 2015 by ladybugnessa
	Thanks for the reminder, A!! (Preview) Since I received my new car, A has been sending me a lot of messages, which I have been ignoring. They all basically say "I want to get a job but I can't work without a car. it sucks sucks SUCKS, life is so unfair". Now he hasn't applied for a job since he quit his old one almost a year ago....after u...	missmeliss	7	565	Mar 18, 2015 by hotrod
	Living in fear. (Preview) I've been busy this week, busier than I have been for years. Happy busy, I like what I am doing, my routine, and the home I relax in at night. But I have noticed that with a new busy lifestyle, and being away from my child, pets, home and comfort zone during the day, quite a few "pre-alanon" habit...	missmeliss	13	603	Mar 18, 2015 by Skorpi
	Can a seasoned member speak to sponsorship please? (Preview) Hi everyone! I'm back into my program after an absence and relapse. My current job and health make it really challenging to get to meetings with any predictability. I understand their importance and power and continue to try to find a way to make that happen. But what I'm wondering is - in the meanti...	LedfootJenny	12	826	Mar 18, 2015 by LedfootJenny
	C2C thoughts for today (Preview) Courage to Change reading for a few days ago speaks about how our progress in Al-Anon often appears slow. It points out that if we expect all our our negative attitudes to be removed instantly,we have unrealistic expectations..The reading goes on to point out that the best way to measure our progress...	hotrod	2	529	Mar 18, 2015 by hotrod
	wallowing in resentments (Preview) Lately I have been feeling a lot of resentments with people in my life. Those feelings are putting me in a bad place. I have been trying very hard to turn them over to God. This morning I was able to pray for the people that are the source of my resentments. I realize that they are untreated alanon people. I p...	Gailsy	6	476	Mar 18, 2015 by lablover13
	It's WORKING (Preview) the man actually apologized to me for losing his temper. Yay!	ladybugnessa	4	403	Mar 18, 2015 by hotrod
	eligibilty for Al-Anon (Preview) Someone told me, I think that it was on this board but I can't be sure, that because of my wife's being a long-timer in Al an, that I am eligible, even though my family lacks any addict or abuser. I've had my own therapy for 100 years so am skeptical of my need or potential benefit from going a 12 step route. ...	drywit44	5	663	Mar 18, 2015 by 1911A1
	Dry Drunk ?? (Preview) I am rather new to all of this, so I was wondering if someone can explain the term "dry drunk" to me. I am hoping my 26 year old daughter stops drinking and gets her life on track, but will it just be her not drinking but still having the same issues with her? What will she have to lie about if she'...	pamala	9	3167	Mar 17, 2015 by Helpangel
	C2C 3-16 (Preview) The Courage to Change today speaks about progress not perfection. It reinforces the idea that Al-Anon works slowly and surely as we use the tools each day one day at a time. The reading points out that many times we have unhealthy attitudes as to how quickly we should grow and change, and become disappo...	hotrod	6	486	Mar 17, 2015 by Debb
	Happy where I am at .... (Preview) I woke up this morning ... Read a bit sat in silence and realized I am happy where I am. I am single, a mom, love my son and my job	Truth	3	338	Mar 17, 2015 by hotrod
	I just gotta do this... (Preview) This is bold & proud! I am so grateful for everyone in my life who have been w/ me through the ups & downs. I hope that in the future there will be more ups than downs just so I can help another struggling Al anon member or anyone who has difficulties that can't deal w/them on their own. I am a prime exa...	Hoot Nanny	1	358	Mar 17, 2015 by hotrod
	Holiday (Preview) Happy St. Patrick's Day to all	hotrod	1	239	Mar 17, 2015 by Debb
	Questioning my motives (Preview) I feel like I have I made some progress in the last few months regarding my 19 year old AD. I am practicing self care again (used to be really good at this prior to addictions entering my life). I have been reading a lot of the literature, trying to use the slogans that I find helpful and practicing detach...	serenity47	12	944	Mar 17, 2015 by akk
	It's the little things... (Preview) I decided that this week I would take some steps to detach when AH calls me during the day to rant and rave about anything and everything. The way I have handled it in the past was to try to counsel him, try to help him strategize ways to deal with problems, or issues at work, I would try whatever I could to tr...	CoopsMom	3	429	Mar 17, 2015 by Skorpi
	I want to go to a Meeting tomorrow night but won't have a ride (Preview) I have never called anyone from my f2f meetings. I have missed the one meeting I started at (where the woman I plan to ask to be one of my sponsors is at) for tw0 weeks due to being sick etc. I want to go tomorrow night but I will not have my car. My AH does not like the AA meeting that is held at the same tim...	ladybugnessa	8	644	Mar 17, 2015 by ladybugnessa
	Where to draw the line when someone is being injured? (Preview) Hi MIP! My AH's dad ( who is an active long time drinker) has been married for 30 years to a woman who is physically abusive. Friday night she pummeled him pretty good - apparently because he was drinking. His head is swollen and it looks like she was especially brutal. So clearly - these are two sick p...	LedfootJenny	10	564	Mar 17, 2015 by LedfootJenny
	"thanks for your input honey I will think about it" (Preview) I want to share how much peace the title of this post brings me now. every time my Idiot AH says something that I know is wrong (today it was that ZICAM makes my very bad cold worse) I say "thanks honey You may be right let me think about it" and I go on my way. all the while I'm thinking about...	ladybugnessa	10	615	Mar 17, 2015 by Gailsy
	HFT Mar 17 (Preview) Morning MIP- This reading is about how our sense of responsibility can become inflated to the point that we are resentful for all that we do (even if we are the ones insisting on doing everything!). I mentioned in an earlier post that my first experience with this feeling was as a child--I am the younge...	yanksfan51	1	366	Mar 17, 2015 by hotrod
	Firsts for him, first for me (Preview) We had our first gaming convention this weekend. At a hotel, with a bar. Standard practice in the past was to bring his own scotch and get beer at the bar. He had not had any cravings till Friday night. Hubby had a craving for a drink after a stressful board game. I WAS not there. He does not have a s...	ladybugnessa	9	565	Mar 17, 2015 by ladybugnessa
	One of those days that just works. (Preview) All has been right with my world today. I woke late (daughter is away this weekend). Did 2 assignments over coffee and then a bit of housework and then I remembered my self-care commitment so I got into the bath (believe it or not, I have been in this house for 6 weeks now yet this was STILL my FIRST BATH IN 5 Y...	missmeliss	9	647	Mar 16, 2015 by a4l
	Still in denial (Preview) There are only three people I have told about my husband's problem. I can barely admit it to myself most days. We"ll have a good stretch of time and I think, well maybe the worst is over, and then something happens and I feel upset again. Last night we were home watching TV and his eyes got red and I fel...	Alma Daigle	5	458	Mar 16, 2015 by Fairlee
	Dad passed (Preview) Hi everyone, it's been sometime since I have been to the boards and I can definitely tell I have been missing you all! My Dad passed away last weekend and his funeral was Wednesday March 11, ironically that was his bday, so he got his wish that we had a party for him. I delivered his eulogy and was pleasantl...	Flower49	12	489	Mar 16, 2015 by Fairlee
	do we have the right to insist or expect sobriety? (Preview) Does being married or living with another person mean we have the right to insist they change, get sober, behave in a certain way? what if the mistake was ours in the first place? I mean we meet a person, build up our idea of who that person is, build our own expectations around how that person will behave,...	el-cee	23	818	Mar 16, 2015 by a4l
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.