The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Courage to Change reading for a few days ago speaks about how our progress in Al-Anon often appears slow. It points out that if we expect all our our negative attitudes to be removed instantly,we have unrealistic expectations..The reading goes on to point out that the best way to measure our progress is to compare where we have been in the past to where we are today. By focusing on progress not perfection, we will be able to note that sometimes we may still maintain an old defect, but at other times We do not go to it as often.
The Courage to Change reading for today speaks about the Eighth. Tradition. This is the tradition that states that Al-Anon work should remain forever nonprofessional. As I read this tradition, Iam reminded to appreciate that each Al-Anon members own experience, strength and hope is all that is needed to help one another recover from the devastating impact of alcoholism on our lives.
The reading also points out that the tradition encourages us to help those who really want help, because we've spent so much of our lives trying to help people who don't want help. It is powerful to know and realize that because of our experience with alcoholism we are better able to understand and empathize with others, and then we are able to give and receive help equally with each other and thereby grow and change..
Today's quote is from Albert Schweitzer; "the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found out to serve.".
I love this reading and the quote from Albert Schweitzer. When I first entered Al-Anon I do not believe I was looking for how I could serve others, I was looking for a solution to my problems. How wonderful that it worked out that my problems and the solution to my problems also were able to be used to help others. What a wonderful win-win for us all.
I think this reading speaks directly to where I was yesterday.
I tried a new Alanon face to face group over my lunch break, and I left not sure what to think of the experience.
I felt very welcome, and supported. But, when I left, I felt that I hadn't made as much progress in my program as I thought. I was surprised how hurt and angry I still felt about the car accident and my wife's subsequent and repeated decisions to continue drinking, and how much emotion I was still feeling about it.
I spent the afternoon feeling a bit disheartened, and questioning my general awareness of my own emotional state. Returning to think about this reading helped me to turn my thinking around. progress is slow, there isn't a set time line, and my success is that I didn't give up. Just because I am doing well today doesn't mean I won't struggle tomorrow, and I need to allow myself that struggle without seeing it as a failure.
I think I will start thinking of my program the same way I think about the many words German have for "the". Sure, I might not pick the right one all the time, but I do pick ONE of them, and with practice, I will get better at it.
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
