Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

zen78 · zen78

This is the first time for me to post here. I've been married to an A/drug addict for three years. He's been clean for some months and relapse big time. Well, it's happening right now. Everytime he relapse, I get so sad and depressed. I know that I need to work the 12 steps and take care of my happin...

debilyn · debilyn

Haven't been sleeping very well. Combo of stuff I guess. Nothing awful at all. just old lady pains....probably too many cats on my bed... I have been desiring calling the A. Just to see him. I just cannot stand not seeing him at all.I don't want anything from him either. It is only his shell anyway. It is s...

afglin · afglin

We got a shockling phone call Thursday. My husband got a call from a lady. She asked him a few questions and said..you are my father and I'd love to meet you. She said she has a husband and kids and he made arrangements for all of us to meet in a few days at a restaurant. We are guessing she is about 41. This ha...

Codependent · Codependent

I haven't spoke to my A in almost a week- though I have thought of him often. Today I was having a moment a weakness and instead of calling him I decided to turn it over to my HP. I did this and went into work. When I got out I had a text from him asking if "I needed a friend?" I haven't responded. Now I...

Lexie · Lexie

((((((((((friends))))))))))))) Thank you to all who prayed for my son when he went before the board of pharmacy in an effort to get his Pharmacists license back. The outcome was not good, but I do know that God was in control none the less. There is a new board president who has instituted a new law in...

christmas card for all MIP Members · John

Happy Holidays to all Miracles In Progress Family Members! Lots of Love from Rose and John

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi group... Please refrain from using religion or other groupings that may have others feel like they may be judged and/or not included on the basis of their beliefs. Although this board is not formal "Al-Anon", we do, in fact, welcome everyone from every walk of life, and it is inapprop...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

or so the saying goes and with that in mind I think I should try to write down what is troubling me. So (((family))), I have been getting on with life for myself these last couple of days and making plans for the holidays, which seem to loom ever bigger on the horizon. Today, just I had made my plans and accep...

Maria123 · Maria123

((((Friends)))), Oh my goodness, I can actually say (and mean) I feel good today!!!!! What a great feeling! I left work today a few hours early and as I was driving away, I thought wow, I don't have a paper due this week, I don't have to study, I don't have homework, I finished my finals. I actually can rel...

souljoy · souljoy

I have been learning a lot about how to detach, how to take care of me, and mostly how to redirect my mind to more important issues instead of thinking about how it would affect the A in my life. It dawned on me a while ago that the A is the one who is sick and does not think one dang bit about me. So why do I give him...

whatnow · whatnow

I've always heard the saying, "a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts." Is this really the case? My AH was drunk last night and I caught him in a lie. When I called him on it he got furious and said how dare I call him a liar and he couldn't lieve with someone who thought he was a liar. Th...

loves2read · loves2read

Guess he's feeling a bit threatened about my distancing. I get a call and he's all sweet, apologizing again for being an ass and wants to know if I want to make a deal. His offer was that he'd stay sober all work week if I would allow him to drink what he wants on his days off. What?! I simply stated I'm not...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

The Awakening~~ A time comes in your life when you finally get it... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a bl...

optimistundone · optimistundone

I have quit obsessing about where I am going to be 6 months from now, a year from now. All I can do is deal with today. So much time wasted obsessing about where AH's addiction was going....what is was going to do to me. Today the sun is shining. I wrote for an hour this morning. I was able to attend half o...

Euoria · Euoria

This post will be brief; I'm out of words...for a change. "Holiday," in most European countries means vacation. I intend to "celebrate the Holidays" by taking a Holiday, that is, a vacation. A vacation from myself, my obsessions, and most of all, my thinking. I'm going t...

Codependent · Codependent

You all have been so kind and supportive in responding to my posts that thought I should share a little about myself. I am 31 years old, single,and the mother of a 3 and a half year old. I have a twin sister and we are the product of an alcoholic and a drug addict. My mother passed away about 6 years ago from al...

Codependent · Codependent

I find that I can detach easier and establish boundaries when I think on the things about A that have hurt me, etc. However, when I allow myself to "care" about A I find I start to lose these boundaries, etc. Does anyone have insight into how we can forgive and yet stay detached?

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I was thinking this morning about how I wish that I could just be nice to the A, be kind to him but it seems that every time I acknowledge him he takes my kindness for weakness. He sees every act of kindness as an opening to try to come back into my life. Each time I talk to him or reply to an email I get escalati...

tryingtoheal · tryingtoheal

Maybe it's the season or maybe it's because I found you a year ago but I've been somewhat introspective this week, reading my past posts over the last few days. I've read how much pain I was in and what a source of comfort you all were to me. Because of my job I didn't feel like I could go to f2f meetings, my f...

kissers · kissers

I have been asked by the director where I work to perform a function that will make our company look bigger than it actually is. I told him that I do not feel comfortable doing so. It feels very deceptive to me. He told me that, that is the way it is going to be. Do I have too much of a conscience??? Is this black...

maresie2 · maresie2

Thanksgiving was a disaster for me. I got pulled into stuff in the house I live in. I am determined not to do that this Christmas. The issue for me is that I have even more time off. For lots of reasons I was not able to get a part time job. I had a part time job that was time limited. That helped. For lots of re...

Jen · Jen

I have come to the realization that I have been putting off a couple of things for the last few days because I am afraid of the outcome. One is to contact the pastor of the church we hold my homegroup meeting at. I have to ask for the key and I guess I'm afraid he'll say no. The other thing is a customer that I nee...

bev · bev

hi everyone,just wanted to know if anyone else going to be spending christmas all alone..i mean alone with no kids no hubby no family{my SAH HAS TO WORK THAT DAY}he came home from work yesterday and told me he had to work christmas day,we had plans to go to his moms for christmas{she lives over an hour awa...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

Maresie brought up the Kaufman triangle (thanks Maresie!). Please google it, its fascinating reading. Here is what I could find to counter the effects: its excellent food for thought as we all jump to all the corners when dealing with the A (at least I sure did). Enjoy- Healthy Skills for each Role P...

ddub · ddub

I found the following somewhere and read it often, sort of like tying a knot at the end of my rope to hold on better. "when we remember HP's faithfulness and his ability to bring good out of any situation, we find our fears calmed and our confidence renewed." Does it seem to anyone else that bef...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I think that the thing that wears on me the most is the constant "expecting the worst" attitude of the A's in my life. Nothing is OK. Everything is bad all the time. Each and every occurrence, phrase, situation, comment or idea is met with negativity and pessimism. I think this is what wears m...

Chetch · Chetch

Per my previous post, I just called my AH from my office and told him that I knew he was drinking last night and that I would have a lot more respect for him if he told me the truth. First he hemmed and hawwed, then said that he had had a piece of rum cake a lunch. I told him that was bull - that I could smell the al...

sara777 · sara777

Hi everyone- So, this is my second post here, and thank you all so much for being such an amazing resource and source of comfort. I went to my first f2f meeting a few nights ago, and it was really amazing and terrifying at the same time. It felt really safe, and I was so thankful to see that there are all o...

Leetle · Leetle

I am upset about something with my boyfriend who is my qualifier. I am having trouble seeing my part in it. This may seem trivial to some, but here goes.... I asked him to take two boxes and a tv to the shed in the backyard. I asked him about a week before my sister, her husband and my nephew were coming to s...

loves2read · loves2read

I am seething with anger and need to vent. Been sick with this Norwalk virus for a few days and am weak. My A is playing mind games again and it is making me very angry. A couple of days ago he accused me of faking my illness for attention. This was after the doctor diagnosed me. Yesterday he comes home f...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Last night I got another call from a bailbondsman. He says so he's a laborer right? and I say I don't know. He's silent for a minute and he says you're his wife and you don't know what he does? and I say we have been separated for about 15 months, I have no idea what he's doing. So he says, well I guess there...

loves2read · loves2read

Hi...I'm new here and am seeking support so I don't lose my mind. I've been in an on/off relationship with my A for almost a decade. My A comes from a household where the mother is the A and he is the only child. I'm an early 30s female living with chronic illness and I come from a family where my father was an a...

maresie · maresie

my two dogs are such happy dogs these days. They don't flinch, shake or shudder like they used to. There were plenty of days when they hid behind the sofa with the A screaming the place down. I felt absolutely dreadful then. After one year of the A putting them through homlessness, leaving them alone...

pogache · pogache

I have just joined this board, and I am so happy to have found it. I am the mother of 2 and step mother to 2, my Ex Husband is an A who still believes he doesnt have a problem. I covered his drinking as best I could and made excuses for years until I finally had enough last year and took the kids and left. My fav...

maresie · maresie

One of the key issues with the A was he was never able to be in reality. One of my core issues is that I find it hard to be where I am. Right now my goal is to try to get more stability in my life. I need a regular job with benefits. I need a more organized existence. I need support from people who can give it. I need...

Gailey · Gailey

Where are you???? Are you still here with us? Gail

ddub · ddub

my ah is well known in our location so folks know me that I don't know which made me pretty skitterish about going to al anon. Went out of town until I learned al anon was about me and confidentiality really does happen in al anon. Have run into a few acquaintenances at the local f2f mtgs but this week I w...

loves2read · loves2read

Just wondering how many others have had their A offer to go to Alanon with them? Mine has in the past and it makes me uncomfortable. He went with me to one meeting and after that I wanted to keep on going - but alone. He lied at the meeting, I didn't say anything but we both knew he was not telling the truth w...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

He's back in jail again. Merry Christmas... All I can say is that I'm glad it doesn't affect me like it did anymore. I don't have to rely on him for a paycheck and scramble to figure out how to bail him out before he loses his job, etc. The strange thing was that I found out by calls from bail bonds places. ...

MikeM · MikeM

hello forum, First of i apologize for a detailed story, but I dont know of any other way to get some answers. I am new, for i am seeking answers. My g/f has been sober for well over 40 days now. She has been taking Antabuse for the duriation of her sobriety. A few weeks ago, she consumed an unknown amou...

klm4446 · klm4446

I am reading a book that essentially says alcoholics have same problems that non-alcoholics do, anxieties, depressions, family and work issues etc; It goes on to say that the above is not what CAUSES an alcoholic to drink, that their disease causes them to drink then makes the aforementioned probl...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

Sometimes I wonder if I am in the land of the living and whether there is a purpose to my life. It is ten days to Christmas and I have found it even harder this year to feel the spirit of Christmas invade my soul. Having managed to wrap up the few gifts I have for my children and grandchildren, posted my cards...

maresie · maresie

I think I have been pretty charitable by calling some of my house mates dysfunctional. I'd now after living there 4 months call some of them total psychopaths. They tend to act out over the holidays. So my plan is to go to a couple of movies on Christmas day. I may go to a movie with a friend on another day....

tea2 · tea2

So while taking my Son to school this morning I backed out of my parking spot - went over some snow - actually ice, heard something dragging and thought it was ice stuck under the car - pulled over and saw the front of the car hitting the ground (the protector part) and then noticed, I am leaking something t...

Becky1 · Becky1

OK, you asked for it! Here is my own little Miracle in Progress, my new granddaughter, Delilah Paisley, born 3 weeks early on Nov. 26! She weighs about 5 lbs. now. Santa said she was the most tiny baby who came to see him that day. Isn't is strange how children can remind you of how precious life is, how f...

Diva · Diva

We are trying to get off to a cat show in north Texas. He (A) doesn't want to go because he has no interest in showing cats. That's ok. I can do this alone. But...he insists on going anyway. Just so he can complain about it. He just left to take one cat to the vet's office; her nails must be trimmed. SO he harrum...

John · John

Hello and Happy Holiday Season Everyone! Every Christmas I ask everyone who is listed on the Miracles In Progress message boards to help me bring a awesomely memoriable Christmas to the many newcomers in the Miracles In Progress Recovery Houses by simply sending each house member a Christmas Card,...

wbfox58 · wbfox58

Hello all... I know I haven't been seen much round here, but I've been so busy putting together a great new life. My A wife and I separated almost a year ago, and under my state's laws, I can now file for divorce. Folks, sometimes things don't work out, and that's not a bad thing. I have never been happie...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

((((Everyone)))) My A is so emotionally unbalanced. He's gone from scaring me to making me worry he's going to hurt himself. In the last two months his drinking has progressed to the point of insanity. He's taking days off of work and calling them "mental" days. He doesn't want to be alo...

QOD · QOD

Ok I got my Blue Belt last night at karate. Shewweee. I was worried about breaking my board too but I did it on my first try. In fact I didn't even believe I had actually broken it until I looked up and saw the instructor hold the bottom half. Then I saw the other half on the other side of the room. LOL. Hu...

wen5454 · wen5454

I am in a relationship with an alcoholic. He is my dearest friend. He was my High School Sweetheart. Yes, Im 44 years old and found and have been with him for 9 years. He has caused my self and my kids (from another marriage) into total caoss. When we first got together he said that he was an alcoholic b...

Just For Now · Just For Now

I am new to Al-Anon and have attended seven F2F meetings since October 2007. I came upon this website and began to browse around in hopes of just finding others similar to my Alcoholic Situation. My F2F meetings are only once a week, so this looks like another option for information and being able to r...

Miranda · Miranda

Please get ahold of me on here! Send me a message...total misunderstanding and I feel horrible. I didn't know how else to get ahold of you...so please message me?

optimistundone · optimistundone

I am having a hard time doing self-inventory. Ever since I threatened to leave my marriage to H's drug addiction, he has gone off the deep end. He has been placing a lot of blame on me and finger pointing - much worse than I could do to myself. So, how do I sort out all this gunk and truly evaluate myself. ...

Loupiness · Loupiness

My ah has been sober for about 6 weeks now. It is interesting because I think I am starting to see some difference in his behavior, however, more importantly, I am feeling more detached, though admittedly still a work in progress. Last night he came over to watch a show with the kids. I had every intenti...

desperate for help · desperate for help

Hello all! I haven't posted ina long time, but often read the posts. AH's drinking is getting worse. He has been in a lot of pain lately in his stomach area. He thinks it might be an ulcer. Doesn't alcohol make it worse? He seemd to be losing a tremendous amount of weight, yet he eats quite a bit and doe...

maresie · maresie

1. The sun manages to come up without your your help. 2. Therapy finally kicks in. 3. You can stop aplogizing for what someone else did. 4. Other people can solve their own problems or not. 5. You really know you didn't cause it. 6. The statue of limitations has expired on your old mistakes. 7. You let othe...

barisax · barisax

For much of my time in both programs, I've seen and heard the "disease" debate probably hundreds of times. I understand it's a founding premise of AA, that it's something we must accept as truth in order to recover. Really? I would like to put out the notion that "disease" is a hu...

whatnow · whatnow

Hi, I'm am new and I'm not sure where to start. I am newly married and my H has issues with drinking. His family has a history of alcoholism. Background, we've been together 4 years and in the beginning it was liquor and beer and constant. Then he stopped drinking liquor and it was strictly beer. Then...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

Here is a good one from my mom: My mother asks my sister what she wants for christmas. My sister tells her she want some old dishes that my mom has. My mom does not have a lot of money and does not like to spend much so my sister thought this might be a good "re-gift", etc. My mom says: "OH wha...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I'm lost (Preview) This is the first time for me to post here. I've been married to an A/drug addict for three years. He's been clean for some months and relapse big time. Well, it's happening right now. Everytime he relapse, I get so sad and depressed. I know that I need to work the 12 steps and take care of my happin...	zen78	6	532	Dec 22, 2007 by Maria123
	Thinken out loud.... (Preview) Haven't been sleeping very well. Combo of stuff I guess. Nothing awful at all. just old lady pains....probably too many cats on my bed... I have been desiring calling the A. Just to see him. I just cannot stand not seeing him at all.I don't want anything from him either. It is only his shell anyway. It is s...	debilyn	2	405	Dec 22, 2007 by Maria123
	Shocking phone call (Preview) We got a shockling phone call Thursday. My husband got a call from a lady. She asked him a few questions and said..you are my father and I'd love to meet you. She said she has a husband and kids and he made arrangements for all of us to meet in a few days at a restaurant. We are guessing she is about 41. This ha...	afglin	10	547	Dec 22, 2007 by Maria123
	How do I know? (Preview) I haven't spoke to my A in almost a week- though I have thought of him often. Today I was having a moment a weakness and instead of calling him I decided to turn it over to my HP. I did this and went into work. When I got out I had a text from him asking if "I needed a friend?" I haven't responded. Now I...	Codependent	4	510	Dec 22, 2007 by maresie
	update on son (Preview) ((((((((((friends))))))))))))) Thank you to all who prayed for my son when he went before the board of pharmacy in an effort to get his Pharmacists license back. The outcome was not good, but I do know that God was in control none the less. There is a new board president who has instituted a new law in...	Lexie	2	389	Dec 22, 2007 by Karilynn
	christmas card for all MIP Members (Preview) Happy Holidays to all Miracles In Progress Family Members! Lots of Love from Rose and John	John	7	566	Dec 22, 2007 by Karilynn
	Repeat of earlier post (Preview) Hi group... Please refrain from using religion or other groupings that may have others feel like they may be judged and/or not included on the basis of their beliefs. Although this board is not formal "Al-Anon", we do, in fact, welcome everyone from every walk of life, and it is inapprop...	canadianguy	9	774	Dec 22, 2007 by Christy
	A trouble shared is a trouble halved... (Preview) or so the saying goes and with that in mind I think I should try to write down what is troubling me. So (((family))), I have been getting on with life for myself these last couple of days and making plans for the holidays, which seem to loom ever bigger on the horizon. Today, just I had made my plans and accep...	Heartbroken	7	600	Dec 22, 2007 by Diva
	a sigh of relief (Preview) ((((Friends)))), Oh my goodness, I can actually say (and mean) I feel good today!!!!! What a great feeling! I left work today a few hours early and as I was driving away, I thought wow, I don't have a paper due this week, I don't have to study, I don't have homework, I finished my finals. I actually can rel...	Maria123	4	420	Dec 22, 2007 by debilyn
	How Insane is this? (Preview) I have been learning a lot about how to detach, how to take care of me, and mostly how to redirect my mind to more important issues instead of thinking about how it would affect the A in my life. It dawned on me a while ago that the A is the one who is sick and does not think one dang bit about me. So why do I give him...	souljoy	6	593	Dec 22, 2007 by Peggy7
	A drunk man's words.... (Preview) I've always heard the saying, "a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts." Is this really the case? My AH was drunk last night and I caught him in a lie. When I called him on it he got furious and said how dare I call him a liar and he couldn't lieve with someone who thought he was a liar. Th...	whatnow	16	3348	Dec 22, 2007 by Peggy7
	I don't think so! (Preview) Guess he's feeling a bit threatened about my distancing. I get a call and he's all sweet, apologizing again for being an ass and wants to know if I want to make a deal. His offer was that he'd stay sober all work week if I would allow him to drink what he wants on his days off. What?! I simply stated I'm not...	loves2read	3	384	Dec 22, 2007 by Peggy7
	The Awakening (Preview) The Awakening~~ A time comes in your life when you finally get it... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a bl...	Peggy7	5	833	Dec 22, 2007 by Peggy7
	Taking control over my life (Preview) I have quit obsessing about where I am going to be 6 months from now, a year from now. All I can do is deal with today. So much time wasted obsessing about where AH's addiction was going....what is was going to do to me. Today the sun is shining. I wrote for an hour this morning. I was able to attend half o...	optimistundone	7	539	Dec 22, 2007 by cookie1971
	"Holiday" (Preview) This post will be brief; I'm out of words...for a change. "Holiday," in most European countries means vacation. I intend to "celebrate the Holidays" by taking a Holiday, that is, a vacation. A vacation from myself, my obsessions, and most of all, my thinking. I'm going t...	Euoria	3	592	Dec 21, 2007 by Euoria
	Sharing (Preview) You all have been so kind and supportive in responding to my posts that thought I should share a little about myself. I am 31 years old, single,and the mother of a 3 and a half year old. I have a twin sister and we are the product of an alcoholic and a drug addict. My mother passed away about 6 years ago from al...	Codependent	4	404	Dec 21, 2007 by lin0606
	Anger (Preview) I find that I can detach easier and establish boundaries when I think on the things about A that have hurt me, etc. However, when I allow myself to "care" about A I find I start to lose these boundaries, etc. Does anyone have insight into how we can forgive and yet stay detached?	Codependent	7	406	Dec 21, 2007 by Jean4444
	Kindness for weakness (Preview) I was thinking this morning about how I wish that I could just be nice to the A, be kind to him but it seems that every time I acknowledge him he takes my kindness for weakness. He sees every act of kindness as an opening to try to come back into my life. Each time I talk to him or reply to an email I get escalati...	carolinagirl	6	670	Dec 21, 2007 by Codependent
	I want to thank you (Preview) Maybe it's the season or maybe it's because I found you a year ago but I've been somewhat introspective this week, reading my past posts over the last few days. I've read how much pain I was in and what a source of comfort you all were to me. Because of my job I didn't feel like I could go to f2f meetings, my f...	tryingtoheal	4	499	Dec 21, 2007 by maresie
	Reality Check (Preview) I have been asked by the director where I work to perform a function that will make our company look bigger than it actually is. I told him that I do not feel comfortable doing so. It feels very deceptive to me. He told me that, that is the way it is going to be. Do I have too much of a conscience??? Is this black...	kissers	3	359	Dec 21, 2007 by barisax
	setting goals keeping busy (Preview) Thanksgiving was a disaster for me. I got pulled into stuff in the house I live in. I am determined not to do that this Christmas. The issue for me is that I have even more time off. For lots of reasons I was not able to get a part time job. I had a part time job that was time limited. That helped. For lots of re...	maresie2	1	540	Dec 21, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	paralysing fear (Preview) I have come to the realization that I have been putting off a couple of things for the last few days because I am afraid of the outcome. One is to contact the pastor of the church we hold my homegroup meeting at. I have to ask for the key and I guess I'm afraid he'll say no. The other thing is a customer that I nee...	Jen	7	508	Dec 20, 2007 by Jean4444
	hi all (Preview) hi everyone,just wanted to know if anyone else going to be spending christmas all alone..i mean alone with no kids no hubby no family{my SAH HAS TO WORK THAT DAY}he came home from work yesterday and told me he had to work christmas day,we had plans to go to his moms for christmas{she lives over an hour awa...	bev	6	465	Dec 20, 2007 by Jean4444
	Kaufman Drama Triangle (Preview) Maresie brought up the Kaufman triangle (thanks Maresie!). Please google it, its fascinating reading. Here is what I could find to counter the effects: its excellent food for thought as we all jump to all the corners when dealing with the A (at least I sure did). Enjoy- Healthy Skills for each Role P...	Jean4444	2	6357	Dec 20, 2007 by maresie2
	holding on to the end of my rope (Preview) I found the following somewhere and read it often, sort of like tying a knot at the end of my rope to hold on better. "when we remember HP's faithfulness and his ability to bring good out of any situation, we find our fears calmed and our confidence renewed." Does it seem to anyone else that bef...	ddub	4	554	Dec 20, 2007 by Loupiness
	Constant Negativity (Preview) I think that the thing that wears on me the most is the constant "expecting the worst" attitude of the A's in my life. Nothing is OK. Everything is bad all the time. Each and every occurrence, phrase, situation, comment or idea is met with negativity and pessimism. I think this is what wears m...	Jean4444	2	337	Dec 20, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Hiding his drinking., Part 2 (Preview) Per my previous post, I just called my AH from my office and told him that I knew he was drinking last night and that I would have a lot more respect for him if he told me the truth. First he hemmed and hawwed, then said that he had had a piece of rum cake a lunch. I told him that was bull - that I could smell the al...	Chetch	5	740	Dec 20, 2007 by Christy
	Frustrated and sad... (Preview) Hi everyone- So, this is my second post here, and thank you all so much for being such an amazing resource and source of comfort. I went to my first f2f meeting a few nights ago, and it was really amazing and terrifying at the same time. It felt really safe, and I was so thankful to see that there are all o...	sara777	2	520	Dec 20, 2007 by abbyal
	What is my part in it? (Preview) I am upset about something with my boyfriend who is my qualifier. I am having trouble seeing my part in it. This may seem trivial to some, but here goes.... I asked him to take two boxes and a tv to the shed in the backyard. I asked him about a week before my sister, her husband and my nephew were coming to s...	Leetle	11	702	Dec 19, 2007 by Leetle
	Vent - I am angry (Preview) I am seething with anger and need to vent. Been sick with this Norwalk virus for a few days and am weak. My A is playing mind games again and it is making me very angry. A couple of days ago he accused me of faking my illness for attention. This was after the doctor diagnosed me. Yesterday he comes home f...	loves2read	6	546	Dec 19, 2007 by maresie
	Bail Bonds (Preview) Last night I got another call from a bailbondsman. He says so he's a laborer right? and I say I don't know. He's silent for a minute and he says you're his wife and you don't know what he does? and I say we have been separated for about 15 months, I have no idea what he's doing. So he says, well I guess there...	carolinagirl	2	307	Dec 19, 2007 by maresie
	Newbie seeking support, my story... (Preview) Hi...I'm new here and am seeking support so I don't lose my mind. I've been in an on/off relationship with my A for almost a decade. My A comes from a household where the mother is the A and he is the only child. I'm an early 30s female living with chronic illness and I come from a family where my father was an a...	loves2read	7	546	Dec 19, 2007 by Jean4444
	remorse (Preview) my two dogs are such happy dogs these days. They don't flinch, shake or shudder like they used to. There were plenty of days when they hid behind the sofa with the A screaming the place down. I felt absolutely dreadful then. After one year of the A putting them through homlessness, leaving them alone...	maresie	1	480	Dec 19, 2007 by afmom03
	I am new here ...... (Preview) I have just joined this board, and I am so happy to have found it. I am the mother of 2 and step mother to 2, my Ex Husband is an A who still believes he doesnt have a problem. I covered his drinking as best I could and made excuses for years until I finally had enough last year and took the kids and left. My fav...	pogache	8	567	Dec 19, 2007 by Heartbroken
	Starting from where I am. (Preview) One of the key issues with the A was he was never able to be in reality. One of my core issues is that I find it hard to be where I am. Right now my goal is to try to get more stability in my life. I need a regular job with benefits. I need a more organized existence. I need support from people who can give it. I need...	maresie	1	409	Dec 19, 2007 by Jean4444
	Rita G (Preview) Where are you???? Are you still here with us? Gail	Gailey	0	320	Dec 19, 2007 by Gailey
	new encounter at f2f meeting (Preview) my ah is well known in our location so folks know me that I don't know which made me pretty skitterish about going to al anon. Went out of town until I learned al anon was about me and confidentiality really does happen in al anon. Have run into a few acquaintenances at the local f2f mtgs but this week I w...	ddub	3	569	Dec 19, 2007 by Heartbroken
	Has you A offered to go to Alanon with you? (Preview) Just wondering how many others have had their A offer to go to Alanon with them? Mine has in the past and it makes me uncomfortable. He went with me to one meeting and after that I wanted to keep on going - but alone. He lied at the meeting, I didn't say anything but we both knew he was not telling the truth w...	loves2read	10	529	Dec 19, 2007 by Jen
	I got the call Sunday Night (Preview) He's back in jail again. Merry Christmas... All I can say is that I'm glad it doesn't affect me like it did anymore. I don't have to rely on him for a paycheck and scramble to figure out how to bail him out before he loses his job, etc. The strange thing was that I found out by calls from bail bonds places. ...	carolinagirl	9	585	Dec 18, 2007 by pogache
	Random seizures, caused by Antabuse? (Preview) hello forum, First of i apologize for a detailed story, but I dont know of any other way to get some answers. I am new, for i am seeking answers. My g/f has been sober for well over 40 days now. She has been taking Antabuse for the duriation of her sobriety. A few weeks ago, she consumed an unknown amou...	MikeM	12	5017	Dec 18, 2007 by round3
	Psychological vs Physiological (Preview) I am reading a book that essentially says alcoholics have same problems that non-alcoholics do, anxieties, depressions, family and work issues etc; It goes on to say that the above is not what CAUSES an alcoholic to drink, that their disease causes them to drink then makes the aforementioned probl...	klm4446	7	1591	Dec 18, 2007 by barisax
	Invisible (Preview) Sometimes I wonder if I am in the land of the living and whether there is a purpose to my life. It is ten days to Christmas and I have found it even harder this year to feel the spirit of Christmas invade my soul. Having managed to wrap up the few gifts I have for my children and grandchildren, posted my cards...	Heartbroken	10	467	Dec 18, 2007 by pogache
	Christmas time (Preview) I think I have been pretty charitable by calling some of my house mates dysfunctional. I'd now after living there 4 months call some of them total psychopaths. They tend to act out over the holidays. So my plan is to go to a couple of movies on Christmas day. I may go to a movie with a friend on another day....	maresie	1	298	Dec 18, 2007 by klm4446
	one of those ENOUGH moments (Preview) So while taking my Son to school this morning I backed out of my parking spot - went over some snow - actually ice, heard something dragging and thought it was ice stuck under the car - pulled over and saw the front of the car hitting the ground (the protector part) and then noticed, I am leaking something t...	tea2	6	593	Dec 18, 2007 by maresie
	A Christmas Angel is Here (Preview) OK, you asked for it! Here is my own little Miracle in Progress, my new granddaughter, Delilah Paisley, born 3 weeks early on Nov. 26! She weighs about 5 lbs. now. Santa said she was the most tiny baby who came to see him that day. Isn't is strange how children can remind you of how precious life is, how f...	Becky1	6	607	Dec 18, 2007 by lilms
	I get so tired of the selfishness. (Preview) We are trying to get off to a cat show in north Texas. He (A) doesn't want to go because he has no interest in showing cats. That's ok. I can do this alone. But...he insists on going anyway. Just so he can complain about it. He just left to take one cat to the vet's office; her nails must be trimmed. SO he harrum...	Diva	8	896	Dec 18, 2007 by pogache
	MIP Recovery House Needs Christmas Cards (Preview) Hello and Happy Holiday Season Everyone! Every Christmas I ask everyone who is listed on the Miracles In Progress message boards to help me bring a awesomely memoriable Christmas to the many newcomers in the Miracles In Progress Recovery Houses by simply sending each house member a Christmas Card,...	John	8	635	Dec 18, 2007 by Jen
	It's been almost a year (Preview) Hello all... I know I haven't been seen much round here, but I've been so busy putting together a great new life. My A wife and I separated almost a year ago, and under my state's laws, I can now file for divorce. Folks, sometimes things don't work out, and that's not a bad thing. I have never been happie...	wbfox58	9	650	Dec 18, 2007 by wbfox58
	Why do I want to believe (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) My A is so emotionally unbalanced. He's gone from scaring me to making me worry he's going to hurt himself. In the last two months his drinking has progressed to the point of insanity. He's taking days off of work and calling them "mental" days. He doesn't want to be alo...	Lunamoth	10	676	Dec 18, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Got my Blue Belt!!! (Preview) Ok I got my Blue Belt last night at karate. Shewweee. I was worried about breaking my board too but I did it on my first try. In fact I didn't even believe I had actually broken it until I looked up and saw the instructor hold the bottom half. Then I saw the other half on the other side of the room. LOL. Hu...	QOD	8	565	Dec 18, 2007 by carolinagirl
	New Here-My Story (Preview) I am in a relationship with an alcoholic. He is my dearest friend. He was my High School Sweetheart. Yes, Im 44 years old and found and have been with him for 9 years. He has caused my self and my kids (from another marriage) into total caoss. When we first got together he said that he was an alcoholic b...	wen5454	6	577	Dec 18, 2007 by wen5454
	Finding this site (Preview) I am new to Al-Anon and have attended seven F2F meetings since October 2007. I came upon this website and began to browse around in hopes of just finding others similar to my Alcoholic Situation. My F2F meetings are only once a week, so this looks like another option for information and being able to r...	Just For Now	6	558	Dec 18, 2007 by afmom03
	Treefrog!!! (Preview) Please get ahold of me on here! Send me a message...total misunderstanding and I feel horrible. I didn't know how else to get ahold of you...so please message me?	Miranda	0	374	Dec 17, 2007 by Miranda
	Question about self-inventory (Preview) I am having a hard time doing self-inventory. Ever since I threatened to leave my marriage to H's drug addiction, he has gone off the deep end. He has been placing a lot of blame on me and finger pointing - much worse than I could do to myself. So, how do I sort out all this gunk and truly evaluate myself. ...	optimistundone	7	675	Dec 17, 2007 by Jean4444
	walking away... (Preview) My ah has been sober for about 6 weeks now. It is interesting because I think I am starting to see some difference in his behavior, however, more importantly, I am feeling more detached, though admittedly still a work in progress. Last night he came over to watch a show with the kids. I had every intenti...	Loupiness	2	417	Dec 17, 2007 by debilyn
	I am really concerned about AH! (Preview) Hello all! I haven't posted ina long time, but often read the posts. AH's drinking is getting worse. He has been in a lot of pain lately in his stomach area. He thinks it might be an ulcer. Doesn't alcohol make it worse? He seemd to be losing a tremendous amount of weight, yet he eats quite a bit and doe...	desperate for help	9	750	Dec 17, 2007 by pogache
	Ten great things about recovery from someone elses addiction (brorrowed from another source) (Preview) 1. The sun manages to come up without your your help. 2. Therapy finally kicks in. 3. You can stop aplogizing for what someone else did. 4. Other people can solve their own problems or not. 5. You really know you didn't cause it. 6. The statue of limitations has expired on your old mistakes. 7. You let othe...	maresie	3	549	Dec 17, 2007 by pogache
	This Disease Thing (Preview) For much of my time in both programs, I've seen and heard the "disease" debate probably hundreds of times. I understand it's a founding premise of AA, that it's something we must accept as truth in order to recover. Really? I would like to put out the notion that "disease" is a hu...	barisax	16	913	Dec 17, 2007 by Karilynn
	New and full of questions (Preview) Hi, I'm am new and I'm not sure where to start. I am newly married and my H has issues with drinking. His family has a history of alcoholism. Background, we've been together 4 years and in the beginning it was liquor and beer and constant. Then he stopped drinking liquor and it was strictly beer. Then...	whatnow	9	783	Dec 17, 2007 by klm4446
	Examples of alcoholic games w/o the presence of any alcohol (Preview) Here is a good one from my mom: My mother asks my sister what she wants for christmas. My sister tells her she want some old dishes that my mom has. My mom does not have a lot of money and does not like to spend much so my sister thought this might be a good "re-gift", etc. My mom says: "OH wha...	Jean4444	7	654	Dec 17, 2007 by Jen
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.