The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
One of the key issues with the A was he was never able to be in reality. One of my core issues is that I find it hard to be where I am. Right now my goal is to try to get more stability in my life. I need a regular job with benefits. I need a more organized existence. I need support from people who can give it. I need friends (I lost all of them when I was with the a).
For me I have to start from there. I will have a few days off next week to focus on that. On Thanksgiving I got caught up in rescuing one of my housemates. I am not going to do that at Christmas. I will try to interact with some of them but I am going to focus on just taking care of me. Every inch of me and every breath in my body wants to run out and please someone, buy things and be liked. It is incredibly hard for me to focus on what I need to do next.
Every inch of me and every breath in my body wants to run out and please someone, buy things and be liked.
I can so deeply relate to this sentence!
I am happy to say that after 16 months of seriously working al-anon (attending 2-3 meetings a week, literature, this board, etc.) I can honestly say that this demon has backed off! And you know what? Plenty of people (and MOST IMPORTANTLY: MYSELF) still like/love me, help me, are eager to please me and buy small things for me!!! and guess what- THEY ARE NOT A's!!
