|
|
Dragging bottom today
(Preview)
Just hate this uncontrolable sadness. Is it worth it? Will it ever change? What is "normal"? Feel very lost and alone. My boundry with my AH is when he picks up a drink I check out for the day physically. I can not be around him when he drinks so a leave. The past three nites I have had to close the s...
|
sarebaer
|
4
|
593
|
|
|
|
How to respond??
(Preview)
I went out with the girls tonight. Very rare for me, but it was nice....I called my husband early in the day to make sure he'd be home...He said he would........Well, he didn't come home on time...My mother came over to watch our child which was wonderful of her. Husband left me a voicemail that I didn't...
|
Steph444
|
8
|
748
|
|
|
|
just wanted to get ya'al's opinions re: exabf's birthday coming up.
(Preview)
So, a month ago, I definitively told my exabf, "please do not contact me until and unless you get sober." I have been good about not contacting him this whole month. Well, his birthday is coming up on Monday. If you were me, would you send him a card? Just a simple card--no big words or pronounc...
|
drummerchick423
|
15
|
1082
|
|
|
|
Perfect joke for my frame of mind right now
(Preview)
My mom just emailed this to me and I had to laugh - fits perfectly with my emotions this morning - hope it makes others laugh, sometimes you gotta laugh, the alternative isn't as much fun! Subject: A woman and a man A woman is sitting on her deck with her husband and she says, "I love you." He asks...
|
likemyheart
|
3
|
585
|
|
|
|
going to CA
(Preview)
This may been a little premature but I am going to CA to see my family especially my DAD & sister! Plans are being made as I am writing this--my mom already made flight reservations & I am leaving on the 10th of May & coming back on the 17th! I am excited & nervous at the same time. My mom made...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
4
|
658
|
|
|
|
My Personal Bill of Rights
(Preview)
My personal bill of rightsI have the right to numerous choices beyond mere survivalI have the right to grieve over what I didn't get that I needed or what I got that I didn't need or wantI have the right to follow my own values and standardsI have the right to recognise and accept my own value system as ap...
|
Tigger
|
6
|
5176
|
|
|
|
not taking responsibility for his problem?
(Preview)
Hi all! I haven't posted here in so long. I've been out straight with taking my A boyfriends dad to his treatments and dr.'s appointments and my own 3 children to theirs. I am missing this site. My A boyfriend hasn't had a drink since Halloween and I am very thankful and proud of him for that. He told m...
|
Holly09
|
6
|
691
|
|
|
|
Insanity/blaming/lying/lack of emotions
(Preview)
Wow. Where do I start? Me and my exabf have been broke up for several months now. We were together for 3 years. I went through a lot when we were together due to his addiction. Well he cheated on me with his ex-gf who happened to be as he said just "his friend and his pill hook-up". Well I caught him...
|
Stillalive2dream
|
4
|
706
|
|
|
|
I like pink
(Preview)
Who knew? I sure didn't. LOL. I have spent so much of my life trying to be who other people want me to be that sometimes I am not sure who I am. I have based every action, opinion and even thought on what response it would get me. I tend to be a bit of a chameleon. Changing colour to best suit my suroundings...
|
searching4peace
|
9
|
845
|
|
|
|
Trying to stay strong
(Preview)
Well I have spoken a couple times to the (ex?) abf on the telephone. He wants to see me today, which means a big "I miss you" hug and falling into bed. I told him no. That it doesn't solve anything and will probably just make things worse. It never worked before and will just make us fall back in...
|
member922
|
2
|
716
|
|
|
|
Just needing a place to vent
(Preview)
Just stumbled upon this site - thankfully. I have a brother who has been an alcoholic for a very long time. He has a young son and a wife, and has decided to go to rehab - for the third time - today. I dont know what I expect to get out of posting, but Im just so boggled by a slew of emotions and I really dont know wh...
|
ConcernedinKS
|
5
|
747
|
|
|
|
Need help with acceptance
(Preview)
I have realized via Step 4-6 that I am very fearful and controlling. It is due to a desire for family. I have picked someone very irresponsible. How can I accept that and move on? My expectations were too high. I have been trying to control the outcome of his lack of responsibility. To think that I did this...
|
gladysg
|
8
|
909
|
|
|
|
shelter for someone who doesn't want to quit
(Preview)
I know someone who is currently living with his elderly parents but they can no longer handle him when he has been drinking. They feel like they're enabling him by providing him with a home regardless of his actions, but they cannot in good concience turn him out with nowhere to go. He cannot afford to li...
|
username
|
7
|
869
|
|
|
|
Could use some prayer as I think things through
(Preview)
Things had been good around here. He was going to counseling with me, told me that I probably saved his life by getting the alcohol out of our lives, etc. Yet, I always knew in the back of my mind that it was too good to be true. I finally snooped(I know, bad idea) and found an open bottle. It just brings b...
|
ilovedogs
|
7
|
945
|
|
|
|
Help
(Preview)
As you know, in addition to my A son that I am always talking about on here, my younger son has a problem too. He is the one that is in the Navy and is in Guam right now while his daughter and wife are with me until the crisis in Japan is over. He has just recently went to a doctor in Guam about his uncontrollable d...
|
Gailey
|
5
|
581
|
|
|
|
Realizations of last night... WHY?
(Preview)
It's been awhile since I have posted anything on here and find that I have missed sharing. I have come to a realization, I am a work in progress. Not that this is new but to me but I have not been working my program diligently as I had. So last night I found myself "teasing" my AH about his alcohol p...
|
wildthang86
|
13
|
888
|
|
|
|
I made him leave
(Preview)
Well I finally hit my breaking point lastnight and told my AH to leave. I'm tired of the lies and drinking and the toll this is taking on me (and my 2 small boys-who I HOPE haven't been affected yet). Last time we had and "episode" I told him if he wanted to stay in our house that he had to go to the Su...
|
floridawife
|
5
|
794
|
|
|
|
Today's thought - Happiness
(Preview)
There is no happiness; there are only moments of happiness. -- Spanish proverb How happy we are right now may hinge on dinnertime - whether it is just before or just after. It may also depend on whether we are examining ourselves to see if we are happy or not. There's nothing like a little introspection t...
|
glad lee
|
2
|
947
|
|
|
|
Should have left a lon time ago
(Preview)
I'm finally going to get out, it's been 20 years. I'm sad,anxious, scared and sick but I know it's the right thing to do for myself and my kids. My AH has depressed and disconnected with us for a long, long time now. It makes me feel like I am a bad person. I feel that my close friends and family all know whats g...
|
kathyc
|
6
|
824
|
|
|
|
Ashley Judd (Mentions Recovery as part of her healing)
(Preview)
http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/ashley-judd-reveals-sexual-abuse-as-child/6b7uh1s?q=Ashley+Judd&rel=msn&from=en-us_msnhp&form=MSNRLL>1=42010
|
Samsgram
|
4
|
2232
|
|
|
|
Why is this so hard?
(Preview)
My AH had his first day back at work yesterday. And I recieved the expected email asking me to get money for him to get beer and smokes after work. And I said no. We are broke at the moment. His time off work to 'quit drinking' has devastated our budget and I have already borrowed $100 from his Mom for gas a...
|
searching4peace
|
7
|
740
|
|
|
|
God does for me what I cannot do for myself
(Preview)
I've had a really interesting experience over the last month and thought I'd share. (It's long, sit down with a good cup of coffee or something.) A few weeks ago, I met a guy while hanging out with my boss. We didn't hit it off right away, just kept stealing glances at each other the night we met. I didn't th...
|
Aloha
|
6
|
1619
|
|
|
|
Long hard day......
(Preview)
it was such a loooong day and started out way too early. Than my job was over and I came home and went online and read some MIP shares and started smiling and even laughed. I have found some great knowledge and hope here after many a hard or emotionally depleting day. I am so appreciative to everyone who ha...
|
flopadopilus
|
1
|
534
|
|
|
|
am i getting worse?
(Preview)
i should start off by saying at this moment in time i am unable to attend f2f meetings unfortunately. i have only been able to go to one but at the current time situation makes it impossible. anyway i have always spent a lot of time anxious/stressing over Ah drinking but lately i find myself worrying abo...
|
tweety23
|
8
|
627
|
|
|
|
Am I doing the right things??....
(Preview)
I need help. (Sorry, it's a long post) My husband is an alcoholic. A functional alcoholic, if there is such a thing. He's rarely ever drunk in the "falling down, slurring speech, etc." sense of the word, although he is rarely ever sober by 7:00 p.m. (Not making excuses, just stating facts...
|
Justpretending
|
7
|
916
|
|
|
|
Looking for some ESH regarding AH and travel with children
(Preview)
I know no one can give me the answers. I am looking for ESH to help me make healthy and safe choices. My AH wants to take our DD on a business trip with him to show her what he does-- a lovely, educational and bonding experience in the world of "normies." In the alcoholic world, it is much more pr...
|
Very Very Tired
|
4
|
673
|
|
|
|
It's been a month..
(Preview)
and nothing has really changed. Just a recap on my previous posts, my AH and I were involved in an argument which resulted in the police being called, and Children's Aid becoming involved (yet again). This is the third time in the past 5 yrs that they have been involved, all relating to his drinking, and...
|
Evian
|
5
|
745
|
|
|
|
getting sober = new person
(Preview)
Hi everyone, thought it was about time I posted an update on my situation or my husband's situation... As some of you may remember, there was a lot of crazy 2-6 months back where AH was just insane, lost his hob, was suicidal, physch ward stays, emergency room, became addicted to narcotic pain killers...
|
danielle0516
|
2
|
682
|
|
|
|
my mom
(Preview)
i am a 31 year old man writing this becasue i am at a loss,,i cant believe i have to deal with this in my life,,here is my storie.
my mother just turned 60 and she is drinking more than ever, last week she decided to drink and drive and she smashed her car up,,her drinking consists of 3 months silbour,,2 wee...
|
southsider39
|
6
|
918
|
|
|
|
So proud of my son!
(Preview)
I was so pleased with my guy! His friend too. He never got mad or upset. Even as they had to put all that fencing in the van and in the uhaul. AND I dug up my 20 foot high bundle of bamboo, they got it in too. I did way too much. I cannot stop when others are working. I did a dumb thing and got stuck on my bum. son help...
|
Debilyn
|
2
|
712
|
|
|
|
A simple "CoDA" Thank you
(Preview)
Hello Everyone, As the founder and webmaster of Miracles In Progress I want to extent a personal "Thank You" to each of you for valuing and utilizing the CoDA portion of our site. As we grow in our recoveries from alcoholism, addiction, or being a family member of a loved one who suffers from this di...
|
John
|
2
|
822
|
|
|
|
Telling a bit of my story
(Preview)
Hi, I'm new to the forums and am glad to be here. I've been going to al-anon meetings for a year and to coda meetings for a bit less. I've been reading through the posts here and learning a lot about other people's experiences. I met with my sponsor yesterday and completed my seventh step. It felt good...
|
Freya
|
3
|
935
|
|
|
|
Sick AH and Guilty me
(Preview)
Those of you who know me from this board will know I have been married to my AH for 39 years and he has been alcohol dependant for the last 6 or so years. Just lately he has been worse than usual. His health has been deteriorating and he has become more and more belligerent and verbally abusive. This last wee...
|
Tattyhead
|
11
|
1008
|
|
|
|
One Day at a Time
(Preview)
Woke up this morning with this song in my head, and wanted to share it with you all. My favorite "recovery" song. Whats yours? David
|
david62
|
8
|
945
|
|
|
|
Slipping
(Preview)
I've been doing really good at working the program. I've been reading tons of literature, going to meetings, making positive changes. But, Im falling back into old behavior. I start reacting again to my boyfriend when I know he's been drinking. Im losing that confidence I had just a short time ago. I f...
|
Corgi2
|
5
|
722
|
|
|
|
Pregnant....now AH wants a divorce
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I haven't been here in a while. However, I need an outlet for this extremely disturbing situation I'm in. Just a little history...AH and I have been married for almost two years - have known each other for three. He had been actively drinking for most of our relationship. He got sober for 9 m...
|
stopandchat
|
12
|
1235
|
|
|
|
Going to a meeting shortly...
(Preview)
I am a little nervous as I haven't been in awhile. The breakup with the ABF was completed this afternoon, so I am feeling a bit sad. I let him get angry with me and I didn't say anything negative to him. I am not playing the game anymore. Instead of sitting here and wallowing though, I am keeping the promi...
|
member922
|
6
|
744
|
|
|
|
confused
(Preview)
HI, I'm brand new to this type of forum but I feel that this is a step in the right direction for me. I have not been to a meeting before but i know what the group is about. You see, my boyfriend of 1 yr is an alcoholic. He's 38 and has been drinking since he was 15. I would describe him as a functioning alcoholic....
|
cbris
|
3
|
411
|
|
|
|
still in limbo!
(Preview)
I can't believe myself sometimes--i am afraid to ask my mom & I never have been like this before! I am waiting to hear from her about going to see my family. It just dawned on me this morning that I really need to see my DAD if nothing else. I had a death dream last night that my dad died but not before I got t...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
0
|
427
|
|
|
|
ups and downs
(Preview)
Hi everyone, feeling very scared yet excited. My ABF is sober and has been for 7 months and the light is really gtting shinned on me. HP has brought me to a place were i can not hide anymore. My A is strong and has realised how sick we are together. I am not so strong and was clinging in there. You see he ha...
|
Tracy
|
4
|
649
|
|
|
|
son causing me grief
(Preview)
Unfortunately my son has started to cause me grief through alcohol, it has become very worrying. I have made the mistake of humouring with items, I purchased a boxing bag, had to go to a lot of bother to get it put up etc, now he want something else. It is all so wearing and I am very stressed with the whole st...
|
maire rua
|
3
|
651
|
|
|
|
I'm not honest now?
(Preview)
I seen my exABF this weekend for the first time in almost two months. It was at a party for a friend so there was not much oppertunity for him to catch me alone. When he did there he was the charming side....but this time I knew to look for that underlined sick person. Then it came out of him....a complime...
|
parfait624
|
9
|
1047
|
|
|
|
So afraid he will relapse AGAIN
(Preview)
I have been married for 25 yrs, and he has drank all thru these yrs with maybe a pause here and there, when he would get a DWI/DUI it would always be "I'm done, I quite drinking", or another good one is the cops were picking on him. This last one was just about a year ago, he hadn't had any tickets...
|
granny07
|
8
|
1483
|
|
|
|
relapsing
(Preview)
Hi everyone, This is my first time posting on this message board. I have been in al anon for over a year and it has helped me so much. I am in a state of panic and anxiety and grief right now, because my boyfriend of three years (anniversary is tomorrow) seems to be relapsing. He has been sober for a little ove...
|
sszamo
|
9
|
907
|
|
|
|
Courage to Change - A Share
(Preview)
Hi Group! Well I finally decided to get back to the basics. I got out my Courage to Change book last night and started hi-liting the things that are the most helpful to me. I was having a difficult time sleeping, hashing over the troubling events that occurred over the past week. One of the quotes at the...
|
member922
|
2
|
569
|
|
|
|
New Member -- Same Old Story
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I'm new to the addiction lifestyle and forum groups in general. I am currently in a relationship with an alcoholic; he has been in and out of rehabs on almost ten different occassions, is no longer working the steps, and is relapsing. We have been together for only a short time, and when I...
|
CarrieO
|
5
|
995
|
|
|
|
New... Consequences vs. controlling? (long)
(Preview)
I am just tonight realizing I need to be here, so I will first off apologize for knowing so little. Normally I lurk and learn, but this has been a rough day and I think I need to get it out there. AH has been half-heartedly attempting AA for the last year. The drinking has been better in frequency... from dai...
|
fabmonkey
|
4
|
922
|
|
|
|
I Just Don`t Know ... Is it Me? Maybe I`am just a pushover...
(Preview)
Right now I`am feeling very angry at my daughter for her behavior. Many of you know that I take on a lot of the responsibilty for my grandaughter. My daughter does not seem truly equipted to give the child what she needs. The child who is 7 is more responsible than the mom is in many ways. Drinking or not dri...
|
Samsgram
|
4
|
940
|
|
|
|
the A's confusing dance
(Preview)
my ex-A broke it off with me in email and "entirely" cut me and my daughter off from contact with him, he was really clear about it. except for an upcoming custody case where he needs to testify, he said no contact. but then ... he's emailed me twice more! and he even called my daughter's therap...
|
purpleraven
|
7
|
1062
|
|
|
|
checking out my signature
(Preview)
|
Ruby
|
1
|
581
|
|
|
|
Do what you can and leave the rest?
(Preview)
Give it to God. But somehow I don't think he can help me to get all my fence down to take to the cabin. He has given me a little energy to do it. Though every joint in my body feels like it is out!Have my sons van, I need an escalator to get in and out! lol I am hopeless, and short, and have only one knee. The uhaul is...
|
Debilyn
|
4
|
1045
|
|
|
|
'Operation Save My Kid" - a success!
(Preview)
Well, it can no way be compared to the biblical story of the Prodigal Son, but it wasn't Rambo either Regardless, I got my boy back. I phoned the school counselor on Thurs, and asked him to facilitate a meeting. He offered Mon or Tues morning. I said "too late", he said "today at 2&qu...
|
Loupiness
|
7
|
1025
|
|
|
|
working the 4th step again, "by the book"
(Preview)
two nights ago i decided to start doing my 4th step again, even though my face-to-face sponsor is unavailable at this time. because i'm going through a big crisis and my regular journaling was too unfocused and my thoughts would spin out of control, i knew i needed a workbook with blanks to fill. luckil...
|
purpleraven
|
2
|
1450
|
|
|
|
hi from insanity
(Preview)
Hi everyone need to reach out. I have shared how since my sober ABF got sober I have been on and off my own programme. He has been sober for 7 months and seems to be o.k. I on the other hand turned into persecuter. He told me that I was jepordising his recovery. He was right my behaviour was unacceptable....
|
Tracy
|
4
|
842
|
|
|
|
I'm SO Afraid of Becoming my Mother!
(Preview)
In some ways that would be good. She's a loving, attentive person (so am I). But she's probably a little too much so...overbearing that is. Anyway, my daughter is 4. She's a very funny, intelligent little girl. She's testy though! (as all 4 year olds are I'm sure...I have nothing to compare it too since...
|
delhommefan
|
3
|
1033
|
|
|
|
Just checking out my signature
(Preview)
On my last post, my name showed
|
Ruby
|
0
|
457
|
|
|
|
Ok so I am not perfect!
(Preview)
It is April Fool's Day & I can't think of a joke; oh well...the truth is I am not perfect! New's flash: I am not even close. I want to spend this day as light-hearted as possible. By the way, on a note, I have been recovered from surgery almost 6 mos. Where did the time go? I am so grateful for all of you who...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
2
|
890
|
|
|
|
Not sure if I am doing the right thing
(Preview)
Hi guys, I had a little 'debate' with my partner, and now I am trying to work out if I did the right thing. It's all rather silly... He has been away for weeks and it's his first day back. Somehow things are always strained when this happens. He gets stressed because I have been reluctant to take responsibi...
|
TheJeanGenie
|
4
|
1146
|
|
|
|
Son is ‘’off the radar’’
(Preview)
No one has seen him for a week which is unusual as hes a very visible drunk, hes a wanderer.He picked up the drink again recently after 9 months in recovery and quickly deteriorated to the way he was before (and worse) so has been a frequent visitor to hospital and police stations. Hes had his phone stolen...
|
Ness
|
6
|
1096
|
|
|
|
I heard a story......
(Preview)
the last 2 weeks 3 different people have come to me out of concern for my husband. We live in a very small town and for the most part know what's going on with each other around here. So my divorce won't be final until July, but I moved out and try as I might to stay dettached with love to my A. We share our kids ha...
|
flopadopilus
|
9
|
862
|
|