Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

KLotus · KLotus

My AH was gone for a week, and returned yesterday evening (he is still staying with his parents). I let his mother take our 2 year old daughter to the airport to pick him up, so that he could have time with her. I have no idea where he has been, and have not asked. All I know is that I felt some relief this wee...

beckylee · beckylee

Hi everyone, i am here hoping to get some wisdom and insight into this disease. I have posted my info on my Bio if anyone is interested. I am recently seperated (His decision) my AH " Doesn't want to be accountable to anyone. " He is living in a small apt a few miles away. He's been inconsistent w...

FORGE AHEAD · FORGE AHEAD

I have been married for 20 years and my husband and I have 4 kids together. For at least the past 8 years, I have been watching my husband drink pretty much every thursday, friday and Saturday night starting at around 5 and ending at 2am. He gets up around 8 or 9am on the weekends and is with our family most...

orchidlover · orchidlover

As someone who was pretty deprived as a child patience isn't something I have much of. I want everything yesterday because I'm always aware that life is scarce and everything can end tomorrow. After a lifetime of being around alcoholics of course that is true because their crises are never ending. ...

Jennifer · Jennifer

We talk a lot about detaching with love but love with detachment is what I experienced today. My exAH moved back to the state a few weeks ago and has helped me with a few things during finals and an acute attack of my disease. It has been nice to have to the help from someone who knows me well enough to not have...

Jerry F · Jerry F

It happens, I've witnessed it before and got to see it again last night. Newcomers outnumbering the oldtimers at the start of the meeting. So we did the meeting on the pamphlet "Understanding Ourselves and Alcoholism". It was a refresher course for me and brought back lots and lots of...

amills4294 · amills4294

My MIL 75th bday is this weekend. My H is throwing a last minute dinner party at an expensive restaurant for 20 people in honor of her and he's asking to invite my parents. We've always gotten together for holidays because of our daughter - both sides came to our house so we didn't have to go to each of thei...

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

Hi! I'm sitting here with my mouth open! I called my daughter and told her "I'm not going to be able to help you with school" she said "OK" and hung up, not even a goodbye. I'm ok with this, but a little surprised, I thought I would at least be able to complete a sentence. Gettingit...

liljeannie · liljeannie

Hello yet again, Some of you may remember me, some not. For those of you that do, you may remember my posting about the vicious assault on me by my now former abf of 9yrs, which happened last July. It took until May 17th to go to trial, and on Friday, May 18th a jury of seven found him not guilty. I am totall...

sookie · sookie

This week has put me back on the roller coaster. My separated AH, who was presumably sober for several months began drinking and hiding it, inlcuding going to work drunk and showing up here drunk on a day he watches our 2 girls so I can go to Al-Anon meetings. Once again, my boundaries were pushed to the li...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Last weekend, my daughters stayed with their dad (90% of the time, they are with me on the weekends, but every once in awhile they stay at their dad's for a family function). I have come to dread those weekends, because my AH tends to be much more likely to be emotionally abusive. I am sure that in his min...

Country Boy · Country Boy

My AW comes home tomorrow from a weeks vacation. I have searched my heart, thought it out logically & prayed for clarity on the situation. Everything is pointing to me asking for a divorce. She doesn't know I know about her infidelity. She be home for hours before me so I know she won't be in a conditi...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

For almost 2 weeks I was unable to get on here at home, which was hard this is a big outlet for me. I have slipped a little with my exAH which tells me I am right to move an hour and a half away, including a ferry ride. I am stressed with my big move in the next 2 weeks. I have rented a U-haul for June 5th and am stil...

Overcome · Overcome

I have been reading some posts tonight about some of you setting boundaries and finding your inner strength with your marriages/relationships. I am so glad to see how al-anon works if you work it! I thought maybe I would share some of my expereince strength and hope (e,s,&h) on the board regardin...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

For the first time my RBF and I had some "things" to talk about. And generally I struggle with feedback as my co dependent reaction is a mix of "OMG I'm flawed, it's fatal" which can lead to bad reactions. I did something that was a good boundary. Because I'm learning that there i...

willowtree · willowtree

Has anyone had issues of being in alanon with someone who you just cannot stand being around? There is a lady who has been coming for many years and she seems to have all of the answers and is very judgmental of me when I ask her questions. I feel looked down upon. We only have few little meetings around h...

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

I shared on this yersterday, my daughter asked for help in getting into a GED program and she did'nt follow through. Today she called, nothing about yestrrday. I spoke to my sponsor and she asked if I hadn't helped her enough already, gave her a car, she lost it to impound, gave her a place to stay for ov...

LeahC · LeahC

Hello, I have made a few posts on here and am trying to make a habit of opening up what's going on with me so I deal with it in a healthy way and not let it sit and fester in me. I really like this website and the amazing support on here for everyone. I live with my alcoholic boyfriend and my 2 year old daughter. I h...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am so glad that my mom & I not only survived our trip on Saturday but we also didn't have to go to court yesterday(Monday) except me had to meet w/ the prosecuting attorney because she pleaded guilty to inattentive driving--she was under the influence of hydrocodone. It was a mess but now my mom is b...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

It's been 3 months since I last saw my AH, 2 months since we agreed to file for divorce and had any sort of email exchange about anything except the divorce stuff. I have been doing really well, minding my own business and going after my goals. Lately I've been thinking about my AH. Not in a needy way. I f...

Jerry F · Jerry F

over the process and am powerless over the outcome. Aloha all. Been doing lots of face to face work with my higher power with alot more listening (with an open mind) and memory work on the process. The program is mine to work...that's the process...my responsiblility and choice on how I do it. I com...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I am thinking about me. Not how sad it is he is a miserable mess dying ever so slowly from his disease. How it took everything from me. It's not so much the material stuff, as that is not important to me. I only want/need the basics. Good quality ones. Was thinking how I am struggling so hard financially. Th...

LeahC · LeahC

Hello, Posted a couple times on here, recently was last night. I have something more on my mind now. To those who aren't familiar with me, I live with my alcoholic boyfriend and our 2 year old daughter. His drinking is out of control lately. Drinking every day and then getting in the car to drive which I p...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

This has been on my heart and mind lately and hope it will help someone else. It helped me. When my mind starts spinning with the why's and why not's...I answer myself, "Because he's an alcoholic." Four little words that I struggle to accept or understand at times, but all the truth I need....

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

I guess I consider myself lucky, blessed, what have you. I met someone recovering from alcoholism but after I'd gotten pretty far into my own recovery from another bad relationship. Not alcoholic but might as well have been. I'm just no longer willing to lose me. I guess after you lose yourself for...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I am trying VERY hard to mind my own business, keep my mouth shut, and I am avoiding confrontation with him right now. He seems very depressed after the sentencing last week and I already know he's been shopping for guns online. Not sure why yet, but he's always been the type of guy to say, "The bes...

srtiels · srtiels

OK....the back story, my AH has been a drinker for 50 years, at a rate of 2 liters every 3 days. He drinks from 9-12PM. He says it is pain management for his back. He is 70, and over the last year has lost the muscle tone in his legs and can hardly stand, will not try to walk and stays in bed 24/7. In looking a...

amills4294 · amills4294

In the past several days I've recognized some real changes in myself in how I react to others. They are baby steps but boy does it feel good. My H does things that I don't like - I used to interject myself into those things and situations and get embroiled in them. Thanks to this program I'm finding I do t...

Bargee · Bargee

This is a really long post, so I understand if you don't want to read it. As some of you may know I'm at my wits end with my AH and the way he has been treating me. At the moment I really cannot stand him. So...anyway we wake up this morning and the first thing he wants is sex!! We have hardly even spoken civill...

lunakat82 · lunakat82

Hi All - I'm not sure if I'm writing in correct place, but I am struggling with family issues now and needed some advice. My husband has been smoking weed for about 10 years now - maybe past 2-4 years it's been very heavy - every day, a couple times a day (before work, sometimes during work, after work and...

LeahC · LeahC

Hello, I have only made 1 post on here but something is bothering me tonight, pretty much every night actually and need to say somethings. I live with my boyfriend, father of my 2 year old daughter. He is an alcoholic and has been since he was a teenager. He has 2 owi's, one of which is from a near fatal car ac...

Bargee · Bargee

On my way to my first Alanon meeting (which ended up a complete fail, there was no one there!!) I thrashed this song over and over again. It's how I feel.

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

Yesterday my a/a daughter told me she was starting to school to get her GED, and asked me if I would take her, I told her to catch the bus, she said she didn't have any money for the bus and asked me if I would pay the fees to start, 15.00 or 25.00 dollars. I told her I would and to call me and let me know when she wa...

Country Boy · Country Boy

My father was an alcoholic. Never abused us kids, just drank, passed out & wasn't part of our lives because of this. He went into treatment & was sober for over 25 years before he passed. I had pretty much come to terms with all of this until I married an A. I have been with my AW for about 15 years, du...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi, I am doing some service for a small convention going around al anon groups promoting it and selling tickets. I did not want to go out to a meeting tonight I was tired and it was about an hours drive the meeting I wanted to visit. When I got there people welcomed me I really only see these members at conve...

hotrod · hotrod

HI MIP FAMILY I AM LEAVING FOR A 2 WEEK VACATION TO TURKEY AND WILL NOT HAVE INTERNET ACCESS DURING THAT TIME, I HAVE POSTED THA ALANON TRADITION 2 TO THE STEP WORK BOARD. PLEASE PARTICIPATE THE TRADITONS DID HELP ME TO LEARN HOW TO LIVE WITH CO WORKERS AND FAMILY IN A CONSTRUCTIVE MANNER. http://stepw...

Pushka · Pushka

Pretty much since the beginning of April life has been leading me around by the nose. This is the first weekend I have refocused myself and really made it about what kind of fun can be had in our little town. Yesterday, we spent about 2 hours in the late afternoon at the park. Had a great time, .. after th...

sweeetr · sweeetr

My AH came home after agreeing to "house rules"~I have made boundaries and stuck to them this time. I am totally able to detach at this point. As I start this remember Its been about five days now he's been home and sober. He is talking about buying a vacation place for our family he has wante...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

My home internet service is down again for over a week and they don't expect it up and running until Monday. The joys of living on a little island, for another few weeks anyway. I went to look at that place on Tuesday and I have gone down 3 times to see this place, she finally let me in to see it and told me they...

pineapple · pineapple

I was feeling a little down today because tomorrow is my birthday. For the first time ever I doubt if my A will even remember, let alone do anything for me. I thought I'd spend the day doing something I really wanted to do for myself. But I couldn't think of anyhting that I wanted to do BY myself. My closest f...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

I didn't grow up in an alcoholic family, but I might as well have. All the same traits were there. My folks were abusive and my mom probably has a personality disorder. Don't really talk to them anymore, but I had to call my mother yesterday to see if she had one of my old military records that I will need...

littlehawk · littlehawk

I have been in love with my Alcoholic "E" for going on 2 years. We are at the point where we both accept that we each need to be in recovery if we are to save this relationship. She has recently decided to go into in-patient rehab. I am sad, but I am supportive. Yesterday, after I had just adjusted...

sweeetr · sweeetr

I dont have expectations anymore so my dissapointments in AH are few. But one of his friends wives (suppose to be my friend) really dissapointed me ... talking crap on me ... oh well, guess I need my tools and detachments for more than just my AH. True friends are hard to find, crap stirring ppl are many a...

Jeng · Jeng

We were supposed to celebrate our 27th anniversary last night. Instead he had a beer or two after work and came home late. Then knowing that I wouldn't be happy because he promised me he'd stop drinking, he was in a bad mood. I have threatened to leave and I know it doesn't work, especially if you don't f...

nyc018 · nyc018

I had a pretty bad reaction to something AH said yesterday. Some background - he is almost 9 months sober, working a decent AA program (from what I can tell), and has a good sponsor. We're separated but he sees me and our son on weekends. I'm trying to be supportive in an arms-length way, but I am still fa...

katfshh · katfshh

About 12 ladies from my job are going on a cruise in Sept. We are in the middle of booking it. Everyone is welcome to go, but there is one woman that is just a nasty, angry, not nice person. I've always been nice to her, but honestly have no desire to share a room with her on a vacation. She is controlling and ju...

MyBrokenHeart · MyBrokenHeart

Long story short. I was married. She was a binge drinker. We had two kids. Nomatter how bad it got, I loved her with all my heart, and it got very bad. After the third or fourth ultimatum of "if you don't stop I'm leaving you," I actually filed for divorce. I wanted to give her the benefit of the d...

leogirl · leogirl

I am new here, but I am desperate for some guidance regarding the A in my life. I met this man literally a year and a half ago and he swept me off my feet, about 6 months into it I started suspecting he was an alcoholic, initially, I just thought he liked his wine. Needless to say, we fell for each other ha...

Lalu · Lalu

My boyfriend of 5 years has been in an in-patient treatment facility for 7 months now for addiciton and bipolar. The first six months were court ordered, he is now there on his own free will which I am greatful for. As part of their standard requirements, family members are required to attend Al-Annon...

Ariel · Ariel

My AB has started drinking again, daily. Today it was early enough for my kids to see it. I called the drinking buddy and asked if AB could stay w/him for the night. The drinking buddy then started berating me, telling me that I needed to come over and talk to him (the drinking buddy), because obviously th...

ladysoblue · ladysoblue

I surprised myself last night and this morning. The husband was out drinking for a long time yesterday, and into the evening and night. I didn't cry. When he got home I pretended I was asleep because I didn't want to talk to him at all. This morning, when he was telling me how miserable and sorry he felt, I...

tired2012 · tired2012

I came across this web site and am in desperate hope that I can get something out of it, My husband, whom I have known for many years( and even married twice) has a alcohol problem, and has for many years, although it's not the every day type, no it's more when he is stressed, and feels like "letting it...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Got my new bed yesterday! Could hardly wait! Now I really should get good night's sleep! Maybe it will make things easier in the future too. I am excited about anything that betters my life! Today is a good day! Going tomorrow w/ my ma to see a movie, lunch & some shopping! It is her 69th birhday tomorr...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

I read this, and it is something I know I have to watch. My program of recovery is mine, and I can't force someone else into their own program of recovery. Loved it so much I wanted to share! "Once upon a time a woman came to Al-Anon to find out how to make her husband stop drinking. She was extremely wel...

angel86 · angel86

i love my boyfriend we both knew right away we were ment for each other he makes me so strong. But i drank with him alittle today i know i got intimidated when he wanted to drink and he said one beer and i didnt want to drink i have been in the program myself and worked real hard to change my soul heart and...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I took him to court on Wednesday. The judge was extremely lenient with him. She gave him 3 days in jail and 11 days of home detention. He will be on probation for 3 years. He will have restricted driving priviliges for 60 days until the end of July at which point he will have the ignition interlock devi...

Audhead · Audhead

My AH has quit drinking for almost 3 years. In that time his behaviour has gone from bad to worse. I've been trying to analyze - somewhat to my own detriment - what is causing this. His sobriety is killing our marriage. He was once easygoing, fun, caring, inquisitive but has seen become abrasive, suspic...

sarah1979 · sarah1979

Hi everyone, I'd be really interested to hear any experiences you have had with alcoholics in early sobriety and mood swings. My AH has been sober for 1 month. This is an amazing achievement and I am really really happy, proud and amazed that he has done it. He is going to addiction counselling twice p...

KLotus · KLotus

Last night I attended my 2nd face to face meeting this week. The topic was "taking risks." It was amazing to hear some of the wisdom from the speaker. To avoid taking (informed) risks is to live in one's fear. As some of you know, I am currently at a very significant and challenging crossr...

scholarlydragon · scholarlydragon

Been gone quite a while from this board. Coming up on Mother's Day was hard for me as I miss my mother a great deal, and her birthday follows it closely on June 11th. So I knew the day would be hard. Not made easier by my aunt (mom's sister), asking me on repeated occasions what I was planning on doing for mo...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Monday update (Preview) My AH was gone for a week, and returned yesterday evening (he is still staying with his parents). I let his mother take our 2 year old daughter to the airport to pick him up, so that he could have time with her. I have no idea where he has been, and have not asked. All I know is that I felt some relief this wee...	KLotus	4	406	May 26, 2012 by Oksie
	Newbie Dry not sober AH (Preview) Hi everyone, i am here hoping to get some wisdom and insight into this disease. I have posted my info on my Bio if anyone is interested. I am recently seperated (His decision) my AH " Doesn't want to be accountable to anyone. " He is living in a small apt a few miles away. He's been inconsistent w...	beckylee	3	522	May 26, 2012 by Tigger
	do I tell my kids(formally) (Preview) I have been married for 20 years and my husband and I have 4 kids together. For at least the past 8 years, I have been watching my husband drink pretty much every thursday, friday and Saturday night starting at around 5 and ending at 2am. He gets up around 8 or 9am on the weekends and is with our family most...	FORGE AHEAD	11	714	May 26, 2012 by sookie
	Patience (Preview) As someone who was pretty deprived as a child patience isn't something I have much of. I want everything yesterday because I'm always aware that life is scarce and everything can end tomorrow. After a lifetime of being around alcoholics of course that is true because their crises are never ending. ...	orchidlover	4	531	May 26, 2012 by orchidlover
	Love with detachment (Preview) We talk a lot about detaching with love but love with detachment is what I experienced today. My exAH moved back to the state a few weeks ago and has helped me with a few things during finals and an acute attack of my disease. It has been nice to have to the help from someone who knows me well enough to not have...	Jennifer	6	553	May 25, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Newbie meeting last night... (Preview) It happens, I've witnessed it before and got to see it again last night. Newcomers outnumbering the oldtimers at the start of the meeting. So we did the meeting on the pamphlet "Understanding Ourselves and Alcoholism". It was a refresher course for me and brought back lots and lots of...	Jerry F	4	450	May 25, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	trying not to control the situation :) (Preview) My MIL 75th bday is this weekend. My H is throwing a last minute dinner party at an expensive restaurant for 20 people in honor of her and he's asking to invite my parents. We've always gotten together for holidays because of our daughter - both sides came to our house so we didn't have to go to each of thei...	amills4294	6	522	May 25, 2012 by Inawhirl
	UPDATE! Results of ESH! (Preview) Hi! I'm sitting here with my mouth open! I called my daughter and told her "I'm not going to be able to help you with school" she said "OK" and hung up, not even a goodbye. I'm ok with this, but a little surprised, I thought I would at least be able to complete a sentence. Gettingit...	Highlyfavored	6	437	May 25, 2012 by Jackie11
	speechless (Preview) Hello yet again, Some of you may remember me, some not. For those of you that do, you may remember my posting about the vicious assault on me by my now former abf of 9yrs, which happened last July. It took until May 17th to go to trial, and on Friday, May 18th a jury of seven found him not guilty. I am totall...	liljeannie	6	522	May 24, 2012 by rara avis
	wishy-washy flip-flopping and struggling... (Preview) This week has put me back on the roller coaster. My separated AH, who was presumably sober for several months began drinking and hiding it, inlcuding going to work drunk and showing up here drunk on a day he watches our 2 girls so I can go to Al-Anon meetings. Once again, my boundaries were pushed to the li...	sookie	8	652	May 24, 2012 by orchidlover
	Working my program, finding small successes (Preview) Last weekend, my daughters stayed with their dad (90% of the time, they are with me on the weekends, but every once in awhile they stay at their dad's for a family function). I have come to dread those weekends, because my AH tends to be much more likely to be emotionally abusive. I am sure that in his min...	stephaniej	9	441	May 24, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Anxious about tomorrow (Preview) My AW comes home tomorrow from a weeks vacation. I have searched my heart, thought it out logically & prayed for clarity on the situation. Everything is pointing to me asking for a divorce. She doesn't know I know about her infidelity. She be home for hours before me so I know she won't be in a conditi...	Country Boy	9	612	May 24, 2012 by Breakingfree
	I am back up and running (Preview) For almost 2 weeks I was unable to get on here at home, which was hard this is a big outlet for me. I have slipped a little with my exAH which tells me I am right to move an hour and a half away, including a ferry ride. I am stressed with my big move in the next 2 weeks. I have rented a U-haul for June 5th and am stil...	Breakingfree	2	624	May 24, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Giving yourself time to recover before moving on... (Preview) I have been reading some posts tonight about some of you setting boundaries and finding your inner strength with your marriages/relationships. I am so glad to see how al-anon works if you work it! I thought maybe I would share some of my expereince strength and hope (e,s,&h) on the board regardin...	Overcome	7	469	May 23, 2012 by orchidlover
	I didn't break! (Preview) For the first time my RBF and I had some "things" to talk about. And generally I struggle with feedback as my co dependent reaction is a mix of "OMG I'm flawed, it's fatal" which can lead to bad reactions. I did something that was a good boundary. Because I'm learning that there i...	AStrongerMe	2	435	May 23, 2012 by Breakingfree
	people in the program (Preview) Has anyone had issues of being in alanon with someone who you just cannot stand being around? There is a lady who has been coming for many years and she seems to have all of the answers and is very judgmental of me when I ask her questions. I feel looked down upon. We only have few little meetings around h...	willowtree	8	507	May 23, 2012 by Dolly Llama
	Need ESH re: helping daughter! (Preview) I shared on this yersterday, my daughter asked for help in getting into a GED program and she did'nt follow through. Today she called, nothing about yestrrday. I spoke to my sponsor and she asked if I hadn't helped her enough already, gave her a car, she lost it to impound, gave her a place to stay for ov...	Highlyfavored	5	861	May 23, 2012 by Highlyfavored
	Trust (Preview) Hello, I have made a few posts on here and am trying to make a habit of opening up what's going on with me so I deal with it in a healthy way and not let it sit and fester in me. I really like this website and the amazing support on here for everyone. I live with my alcoholic boyfriend and my 2 year old daughter. I h...	LeahC	7	562	May 23, 2012 by Breakingfree
	my mom & I survived! (Preview) I am so glad that my mom & I not only survived our trip on Saturday but we also didn't have to go to court yesterday(Monday) except me had to meet w/ the prosecuting attorney because she pleaded guilty to inattentive driving--she was under the influence of hydrocodone. It was a mess but now my mom is b...	Hoot Nanny	2	281	May 23, 2012 by Jerry F
	Thoughts of contacting estranged AH (Preview) It's been 3 months since I last saw my AH, 2 months since we agreed to file for divorce and had any sort of email exchange about anything except the divorce stuff. I have been doing really well, minding my own business and going after my goals. Lately I've been thinking about my AH. Not in a needy way. I f...	Dolly Llama	17	694	May 23, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Not powerless (Preview) over the process and am powerless over the outcome. Aloha all. Been doing lots of face to face work with my higher power with alot more listening (with an open mind) and memory work on the process. The program is mine to work...that's the process...my responsiblility and choice on how I do it. I com...	Jerry F	9	694	May 23, 2012 by Breakingfree
	I guess today... (Preview) I am thinking about me. Not how sad it is he is a miserable mess dying ever so slowly from his disease. How it took everything from me. It's not so much the material stuff, as that is not important to me. I only want/need the basics. Good quality ones. Was thinking how I am struggling so hard financially. Th...	Debilyn	11	923	May 23, 2012 by Debilyn
	My daughter (Preview) Hello, Posted a couple times on here, recently was last night. I have something more on my mind now. To those who aren't familiar with me, I live with my alcoholic boyfriend and our 2 year old daughter. His drinking is out of control lately. Drinking every day and then getting in the car to drive which I p...	LeahC	4	632	May 22, 2012 by LeahC
	Why? Because s/he's an alcoholic. (Preview) This has been on my heart and mind lately and hope it will help someone else. It helped me. When my mind starts spinning with the why's and why not's...I answer myself, "Because he's an alcoholic." Four little words that I struggle to accept or understand at times, but all the truth I need....	Dolly Llama	5	458	May 22, 2012 by sookie
	Another Vote for taking care of yourself (Preview) I guess I consider myself lucky, blessed, what have you. I met someone recovering from alcoholism but after I'd gotten pretty far into my own recovery from another bad relationship. Not alcoholic but might as well have been. I'm just no longer willing to lose me. I guess after you lose yourself for...	AStrongerMe	6	538	May 22, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Off topic: Need to vent about AH (Preview) I am trying VERY hard to mind my own business, keep my mouth shut, and I am avoiding confrontation with him right now. He seems very depressed after the sentencing last week and I already know he's been shopping for guns online. Not sure why yet, but he's always been the type of guy to say, "The bes...	ilovedogs	8	584	May 22, 2012 by Dolly Llama
	Need suggestions (Preview) OK....the back story, my AH has been a drinker for 50 years, at a rate of 2 liters every 3 days. He drinks from 9-12PM. He says it is pain management for his back. He is 70, and over the last year has lost the muscle tone in his legs and can hardly stand, will not try to walk and stays in bed 24/7. In looking a...	srtiels	12	2389	May 22, 2012 by orchidlover
	baby steps and recognizing my part in it all (Preview) In the past several days I've recognized some real changes in myself in how I react to others. They are baby steps but boy does it feel good. My H does things that I don't like - I used to interject myself into those things and situations and get embroiled in them. Thanks to this program I'm finding I do t...	amills4294	3	391	May 22, 2012 by Jackie11
	Feeling really angry (Preview) This is a really long post, so I understand if you don't want to read it. As some of you may know I'm at my wits end with my AH and the way he has been treating me. At the moment I really cannot stand him. So...anyway we wake up this morning and the first thing he wants is sex!! We have hardly even spoken civill...	Bargee	11	784	May 22, 2012 by Pushka
	My husband refuses to quite smoking weed... (Preview) Hi All - I'm not sure if I'm writing in correct place, but I am struggling with family issues now and needed some advice. My husband has been smoking weed for about 10 years now - maybe past 2-4 years it's been very heavy - every day, a couple times a day (before work, sometimes during work, after work and...	lunakat82	5	1265	May 22, 2012 by BRAlanon
	Scared (Preview) Hello, I have only made 1 post on here but something is bothering me tonight, pretty much every night actually and need to say somethings. I live with my boyfriend, father of my 2 year old daughter. He is an alcoholic and has been since he was a teenager. He has 2 owi's, one of which is from a near fatal car ac...	LeahC	5	525	May 22, 2012 by Bargee
	Pink - Walk Away (Preview) On my way to my first Alanon meeting (which ended up a complete fail, there was no one there!!) I thrashed this song over and over again. It's how I feel.	Bargee	8	2833	May 22, 2012 by Bargee
	Making progress! I think! (Preview) Yesterday my a/a daughter told me she was starting to school to get her GED, and asked me if I would take her, I told her to catch the bus, she said she didn't have any money for the bus and asked me if I would pay the fees to start, 15.00 or 25.00 dollars. I told her I would and to call me and let me know when she wa...	Highlyfavored	4	413	May 22, 2012 by Jerry F
	My story (Preview) My father was an alcoholic. Never abused us kids, just drank, passed out & wasn't part of our lives because of this. He went into treatment & was sober for over 25 years before he passed. I had pretty much come to terms with all of this until I married an A. I have been with my AW for about 15 years, du...	Country Boy	8	611	May 22, 2012 by david62
	rewards (Preview) Hi, I am doing some service for a small convention going around al anon groups promoting it and selling tickets. I did not want to go out to a meeting tonight I was tired and it was about an hours drive the meeting I wanted to visit. When I got there people welcomed me I really only see these members at conve...	Tracy	2	401	May 22, 2012 by Tigger
	TRADITION 2 (Preview) HI MIP FAMILY I AM LEAVING FOR A 2 WEEK VACATION TO TURKEY AND WILL NOT HAVE INTERNET ACCESS DURING THAT TIME, I HAVE POSTED THA ALANON TRADITION 2 TO THE STEP WORK BOARD. PLEASE PARTICIPATE THE TRADITONS DID HELP ME TO LEARN HOW TO LIVE WITH CO WORKERS AND FAMILY IN A CONSTRUCTIVE MANNER. http://stepw...	hotrod	0	312	May 21, 2012 by hotrod
	Life On Life's Terms :) (Preview) Pretty much since the beginning of April life has been leading me around by the nose. This is the first weekend I have refocused myself and really made it about what kind of fun can be had in our little town. Yesterday, we spent about 2 hours in the late afternoon at the park. Had a great time, .. after th...	Pushka	11	718	May 21, 2012 by Breakingfree
	i sit back and think, my life is quit "interesting" at times (Preview) My AH came home after agreeing to "house rules"~I have made boundaries and stuck to them this time. I am totally able to detach at this point. As I start this remember Its been about five days now he's been home and sober. He is talking about buying a vacation place for our family he has wante...	sweeetr	2	314	May 21, 2012 by sweeetr
	Sorry I have been absent for a week ~Update~ (Preview) My home internet service is down again for over a week and they don't expect it up and running until Monday. The joys of living on a little island, for another few weeks anyway. I went to look at that place on Tuesday and I have gone down 3 times to see this place, she finally let me in to see it and told me they...	Breakingfree	5	588	May 21, 2012 by surfgirl123
	HP came through again (Preview) I was feeling a little down today because tomorrow is my birthday. For the first time ever I doubt if my A will even remember, let alone do anything for me. I thought I'd spend the day doing something I really wanted to do for myself. But I couldn't think of anyhting that I wanted to do BY myself. My closest f...	pineapple	9	560	May 21, 2012 by Oksie
	Lack of Direct Communication (Preview) I didn't grow up in an alcoholic family, but I might as well have. All the same traits were there. My folks were abusive and my mom probably has a personality disorder. Don't really talk to them anymore, but I had to call my mother yesterday to see if she had one of my old military records that I will need...	Dolly Llama	6	402	May 20, 2012 by Dolly Llama
	Struggling with fears / abandonment issues (Preview) I have been in love with my Alcoholic "E" for going on 2 years. We are at the point where we both accept that we each need to be in recovery if we are to save this relationship. She has recently decided to go into in-patient rehab. I am sad, but I am supportive. Yesterday, after I had just adjusted...	littlehawk	6	926	May 20, 2012 by littlehawk
	use to dissapointment but... (Preview) I dont have expectations anymore so my dissapointments in AH are few. But one of his friends wives (suppose to be my friend) really dissapointed me ... talking crap on me ... oh well, guess I need my tools and detachments for more than just my AH. True friends are hard to find, crap stirring ppl are many a...	sweeetr	2	373	May 20, 2012 by hotrod
	Help for a newcomer (Preview) We were supposed to celebrate our 27th anniversary last night. Instead he had a beer or two after work and came home late. Then knowing that I wouldn't be happy because he promised me he'd stop drinking, he was in a bad mood. I have threatened to leave and I know it doesn't work, especially if you don't f...	Jeng	6	639	May 20, 2012 by Jerry F
	I need to vent (Preview) I had a pretty bad reaction to something AH said yesterday. Some background - he is almost 9 months sober, working a decent AA program (from what I can tell), and has a good sponsor. We're separated but he sees me and our son on weekends. I'm trying to be supportive in an arms-length way, but I am still fa...	nyc018	4	509	May 20, 2012 by pineapple
	Not nice people and how to deal with them? (Preview) About 12 ladies from my job are going on a cruise in Sept. We are in the middle of booking it. Everyone is welcome to go, but there is one woman that is just a nasty, angry, not nice person. I've always been nice to her, but honestly have no desire to share a room with her on a vacation. She is controlling and ju...	katfshh	8	557	May 20, 2012 by katfshh
	I'm pretty sure that my 10 year relationship with the woman I love is over. (Preview) Long story short. I was married. She was a binge drinker. We had two kids. Nomatter how bad it got, I loved her with all my heart, and it got very bad. After the third or fourth ultimatum of "if you don't stop I'm leaving you," I actually filed for divorce. I wanted to give her the benefit of the d...	MyBrokenHeart	12	578	May 20, 2012 by Debilyn
	Have I lost my mind???? (Preview) I am new here, but I am desperate for some guidance regarding the A in my life. I met this man literally a year and a half ago and he swept me off my feet, about 6 months into it I started suspecting he was an alcoholic, initially, I just thought he liked his wine. Needless to say, we fell for each other ha...	leogirl	5	570	May 20, 2012 by Debilyn
	Forced to get Al-Annon sponsor... thoughts? (Preview) My boyfriend of 5 years has been in an in-patient treatment facility for 7 months now for addiciton and bipolar. The first six months were court ordered, he is now there on his own free will which I am greatful for. As part of their standard requirements, family members are required to attend Al-Annon...	Lalu	11	826	May 19, 2012 by nmike
	Called Police (Preview) My AB has started drinking again, daily. Today it was early enough for my kids to see it. I called the drinking buddy and asked if AB could stay w/him for the night. The drinking buddy then started berating me, telling me that I needed to come over and talk to him (the drinking buddy), because obviously th...	Ariel	9	677	May 19, 2012 by LeahC
	I surprised myself! (Preview) I surprised myself last night and this morning. The husband was out drinking for a long time yesterday, and into the evening and night. I didn't cry. When he got home I pretended I was asleep because I didn't want to talk to him at all. This morning, when he was telling me how miserable and sorry he felt, I...	ladysoblue	8	496	May 19, 2012 by Pushka
	New to Al-anon (Preview) I came across this web site and am in desperate hope that I can get something out of it, My husband, whom I have known for many years( and even married twice) has a alcohol problem, and has for many years, although it's not the every day type, no it's more when he is stressed, and feels like "letting it...	tired2012	5	451	May 19, 2012 by Pushka
	Just me; real simple! (Preview) Got my new bed yesterday! Could hardly wait! Now I really should get good night's sleep! Maybe it will make things easier in the future too. I am excited about anything that betters my life! Today is a good day! Going tomorrow w/ my ma to see a movie, lunch & some shopping! It is her 69th birhday tomorr...	Hoot Nanny	0	267	May 18, 2012 by Hoot Nanny
	ODAT May 18 (Preview) I read this, and it is something I know I have to watch. My program of recovery is mine, and I can't force someone else into their own program of recovery. Loved it so much I wanted to share! "Once upon a time a woman came to Al-Anon to find out how to make her husband stop drinking. She was extremely wel...	Jackie11	5	627	May 19, 2012 by Michelle814
	I drank with my aloholic boyfriend (Preview) i love my boyfriend we both knew right away we were ment for each other he makes me so strong. But i drank with him alittle today i know i got intimidated when he wanted to drink and he said one beer and i didnt want to drink i have been in the program myself and worked real hard to change my soul heart and...	angel86	4	619	May 19, 2012 by Debilyn
	AH was sentenced on Wednesday (Preview) I took him to court on Wednesday. The judge was extremely lenient with him. She gave him 3 days in jail and 11 days of home detention. He will be on probation for 3 years. He will have restricted driving priviliges for 60 days until the end of July at which point he will have the ignition interlock devi...	ilovedogs	10	738	May 19, 2012 by Debilyn
	Sobriety Behaviour (Preview) My AH has quit drinking for almost 3 years. In that time his behaviour has gone from bad to worse. I've been trying to analyze - somewhat to my own detriment - what is causing this. His sobriety is killing our marriage. He was once easygoing, fun, caring, inquisitive but has seen become abrasive, suspic...	Audhead	8	685	May 18, 2012 by Audhead
	Mood swings in the newly sober alcoholic (Preview) Hi everyone, I'd be really interested to hear any experiences you have had with alcoholics in early sobriety and mood swings. My AH has been sober for 1 month. This is an amazing achievement and I am really really happy, proud and amazed that he has done it. He is going to addiction counselling twice p...	sarah1979	7	3600	May 18, 2012 by sarah1979
	Taking Risks (Preview) Last night I attended my 2nd face to face meeting this week. The topic was "taking risks." It was amazing to hear some of the wisdom from the speaker. To avoid taking (informed) risks is to live in one's fear. As some of you know, I am currently at a very significant and challenging crossr...	KLotus	10	871	May 18, 2012 by orchidlover
	An unexpected reaction (Preview) Been gone quite a while from this board. Coming up on Mother's Day was hard for me as I miss my mother a great deal, and her birthday follows it closely on June 11th. So I knew the day would be hard. Not made easier by my aunt (mom's sister), asking me on repeated occasions what I was planning on doing for mo...	scholarlydragon	2	460	May 18, 2012 by orchidlover
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.