|
|
Feb 5, Hope for Today Reading ..
(Preview)
Our shortest slogan, "Think," can be very helpful. However, as with most tools, I need to use it with care and reason. As I've heard it said around the Al-Anon rooms, my best thinking is what got me here. For me, thinking too much or in a negative way is almost as dangerous as not thinking at all...
|
MeTwo2
|
4
|
301
|
|
|
|
My addiction
(Preview)
I think I might be addicted to Alanon. Is that possible? I only read Alanon literature, I dont read for pleasure anymore. lol Its on my mind from morning until night, I cant see life from any other eyes now so the world seems different to me. People seem transparent and in desperate need of the program to m...
|
el-cee
|
6
|
461
|
|
|
|
" I Love You More"
(Preview)
Speaking of songs, Matthew Wests song, "I Love You More" I Swear was written just for my family! We Always say, "I Love You More than ALLLL the ................. in the whole world!" Or universe! The grandchildren know nothing else but this, and my Dad would always say, &quo...
|
Grace7
|
8
|
282
|
|
|
|
taxed
(Preview)
I don't know where to share or to talk about some of my experiences at my job. I know they are affecting my sobriety, but they also relate to having to deal with alcoholics and addicts all day every day. This week was nuts. I am still at work for the 6th day in a row. Clients were insane (literally) today...
|
pinkchip
|
28
|
533
|
|
|
|
I need a place for all this anger.
(Preview)
I wish I could drive by a landfill and throw all my anger out. I know that landfill would be filled to the brim. My anger was so misguided yesterday. I seemed to be mad about everything in life. I definitely was not happy. Usually I can get mad and move on but this stuck to me. I know where the anger is from whi...
|
hopes314
|
17
|
552
|
|
|
|
Talking tonight
(Preview)
I told my AH that (after an entire day of the silent treatment) I was going to my parent's house for a few days. He asked that I come home and we talk. I said fine. I know what's going to happen. He's going to promise to change, to stop drinking, to do anything I want, to change for me. And that's not enough...
|
SpiderArcana
|
21
|
666
|
|
|
|
A tribal custom for healing
(Preview)
Several years ago, I learned that a certain tribe in a small village in Africa would deal with the offenses of a villager by placing the offending person in a circle. The entire tribe would circle the person whose offenses were of grave concern to them. Then, each villager would take a turn telling th...
|
grateful2be
|
7
|
403
|
|
|
|
Other people's defenses, Blanche and me
(Preview)
One of the things I've learned as a longtime program member of Al-Anon is how uncomfortable I can be over somebody else's denial. I have learned to let a person be where they are for the most part although sometimes I might slip up. I truly don't know what kind of harm I can do to another if I try to rip off t...
|
grateful2be
|
19
|
511
|
|
|
|
setting boundaries
(Preview)
On Monday I set a boundary with my husband.I no longer live at home I got my own apt. The last bill at our home with my name was the light bill. It was $200 and if he didnt pay by Monday it was going to be disconnected. He told me he could not pay it. So i told him to get a prepay electric company and switch it over to...
|
texasgal
|
16
|
343
|
|
|
|
Powerful Song
(Preview)
This song grabbed me from the first line. To me, it describes so clearly the feelings of having to walk away from someone you love but they are so "numb" they seem not to understand or even care what they've done. After boo hooing through the Carrie Underwood song that someone posted earlier...
|
wornoutmrsfixit
|
2
|
254
|
|
|
|
Surrender - Random thoughts on
(Preview)
After copious reading on Surrender I have come to believe that it is a step process, not a not there one moment and there the next. I have now come to believe that what I thought was my surrender was merely compliance. I was doing all the right things. But, until my conscious and unconscious linked...
|
Tricia911
|
6
|
1205
|
|
|
|
Needing advice-very new
(Preview)
This is my very first time on here or any other message board. I am at the end of my rope and just googled "I hate alcohol" and came to this site. I have never been to al-anon, but after reading some of these posts, I plan to now! Until then, I have a question for all of you pros. My adult daughter is a...
|
padodi
|
13
|
524
|
|
|
|
Will Grief Abate and Probs it causes...I think?
(Preview)
Its been 2 months since Dad died. I sat down with the mounds of paper work, which I've been chipping away at. When I filed his poa, the tears came. I've spent so many years taking care of him, making sure he is provided for as age crept up and visited his mind. I worked ever so diligently to maintain his d...
|
Grace7
|
3
|
295
|
|
|
|
apology accepted; reconciliation.
(Preview)
Time to move on after the apology from my mom is totally accepted. I think she is bringing me back into her world again. I am just so glad that I will probably be in the know from now on. She is still going to be in the doghouse if she pulls one of those again. I am so grateful for this program that I have so many fr...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
2
|
231
|
|
|
|
Have you ever wondered...
(Preview)
....how, way back in time those founders got this together. I mean this philosophy is based many different philosophies. I don't know them all but I have read quotes from Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity, many ancient philosophers and general wise folks like Abraham Lincoln. What kind of educat...
|
el-cee
|
5
|
299
|
|
|
|
work in progress!
(Preview)
I read that poster today by coincidence: 'I guess the moment everything changed was when I realized I deserved so much better.' and it just clicked. I hav spend the past 2 months away from A, and lived back in my 'original' environment. Many moments of peace came over me, as well as many moments of grie...
|
tortuga
|
7
|
397
|
|
|
|
WOW.. Live like you were dying song
(Preview)
Just wanted to share.. I was feeling sad and angry for some reasons and I prayed to God from my heart and asked for help. Just asked to guide me and show me how to go thru it in any kind of way... and when i got into the car a song was starting and I just had a feeling it was my answer, don't know why... there was the...
|
Venera
|
7
|
379
|
|
|
|
A New Freedom!
(Preview)
I feel like the process is sort of like wading into chilly water. I take it really slow... sometimes I stop and let myself warm up to it a bit. I sometimes walk back out. Sometimes I just dive in : ) When you take a peek at something fragile and delicate, it's okay to just gently set it back on the shelf to l...
|
Tasha
|
6
|
231
|
|
|
|
Too exhausted to be anything but a ball of sadness
(Preview)
We got into a nice big fight. I know that it stems from me not keeping myself in recovery. I am just so friggin tired of not being normal. I am tired of fighting this crap, this crap feeling. tired of trying so hard to feel better. I guess I gave up and got swept back out to sea. It was that time for me and I was a...
|
sadsusie
|
12
|
379
|
|
|
|
The Power of the Daily Reader!!!
(Preview)
I read the Courage to Change, One Day at a Time and more recently Hope for Today. They teach and reinforce the philosophy of Alanon and they help me try hard to live it everyday. They all seem to have their own purpose. The ODAT is brilliant, even if a bit old fashioned, full of wisdom. The Courage to Change...
|
el-cee
|
11
|
585
|
|
|
|
Making Dinner and be Grateful
(Preview)
I'm in the kitchen making dinner and I'm washing my hands. I just thought how grateful I am to have so much water, lights, heat and AC, a roof over my head and a job to go to. I take so much for granted and for some reason all this came to me now how grateful I am to have such a good life. I've always had it just fo...
|
Cathyinaz
|
9
|
342
|
|
|
|
He's mad because I don't trust him (still)
(Preview)
I would probably be mad as well. He says he feels like a prisoner in his own house, that I constantly throw his drinking in his face, and that I don't think he can take care of himself or do what is best for him. He's totally right, I don't. And I don't know if he'll ever earn that trust and respect back from m...
|
SpiderArcana
|
8
|
620
|
|
|
|
New here
(Preview)
hello everyone just new to the group wanted to say Thank You to those who have helped me and welcomed me in the chat room this morning, i will be back to share my story , i need help to pull me through a lot , messedupgirl is what I am , but can see so much help here, i will be strong and I will pull through , just bar...
|
messedupgirl
|
8
|
387
|
|
|
|
Never give up on you
(Preview)
|
Tasha
|
6
|
331
|
|
|
|
EGO
(Preview)
Would love to hear your thoughts on EGO, I am confused, I know I never loved myself before recovery and al anon, I had low self worth. Today I know I matter and I am learning self care. However although I had low self worth I was confident in my abilities I liked to take control run the show. I think alcohol...
|
Tracy
|
6
|
1031
|
|
|
|
Feeling not sure
(Preview)
Ok I'm in a state of confusion and this is real. I'm starting to question how far I should stay on my side of the street . I been very good up stair minding my own self I started to read step 1 again because some of me are not getting it right. I forgot my serenity pray . I do have great gaps of memory loss . I see my t...
|
Wisdom67
|
5
|
339
|
|
|
|
Weekly update :)
(Preview)
I was thinking about the lessons of the last week .. there have been many. I'm just trying to keep doing the next right thing. It's not always easy and I'm trying to do things on my own which is good just hard at times. I'm still in toddler mode running before I can walk kind of deal. I really want to run an...
|
SerenityRUS
|
2
|
250
|
|
|
|
Letting go
(Preview)
I am new to this board and grateful that it is here. My alcoholic boyfriend and I broke up in early January after a year and a half together...most of which we lived together. He is a daily drinker of moderately expensive red wine. He starts drinking pinot noir upon waking in the morning and doesn't s...
|
Saleschic721
|
9
|
429
|
|
|
|
Detaching with love...
(Preview)
I am having such a hard time with this... this past Sept my AH driving blasted at 6 pm and me crying on the phone as I was trying to figure out where he was pushed is to a different point in things.
I started going to al anon immediately when I avoided it like the plague for the years before. He started to go to A...
|
kat42
|
7
|
567
|
|
|
|
2 Storys
(Preview)
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the King's' wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it.. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did an...
|
oldergal
|
3
|
255
|
|
|
|
Detachment
(Preview)
I think I finally get it with detachment. It has taken me a long time but hopefully I am close. I like to go on YouTube.com and type in alcoholism, denial of alcoholism, stories of alcoholics, treatments, etc. I find a lot of valuable information doing this. I was on YouTube for a couple of hours yest...
|
Jen61
|
9
|
487
|
|
|
|
There's no denying the sadness
(Preview)
or the compulsion to cry over it. I've mentioned that my eldest son has relapsed and its been a while since. Denial and the tricks which come with it have kept it under the rug until the problem became too large and the rug too small. The entire family...including my wife and I are invloved. My wife...
|
Jerry F
|
17
|
815
|
|
|
|
i keep getting sucked back in
(Preview)
I have been going to alnon since March. I have been growing everyday from the experience. I am having a hard time with trust. I do not trust my aa at all. He stopped drinking in Nov, but really I don't know since he moved out of state to his new job. How can have a relationship without trust. I am trying to re...
|
hopes314
|
9
|
471
|
|
|
|
Can you work this recovery program without face to face meetings?
(Preview)
I have been thinking about how Alanon works. Is it possible to recover without face to face meetings? Are these on line facilities enough? Are they add ons, or supplementary?
|
el-cee
|
22
|
545
|
|
|
|
Dealing with rejection...ESH?
(Preview)
I'm curious as to how many of the fine people on here experience feelings of rejection (real or imagined) and how you've dealt or deal with it. I seem to be better at dealing with anger than my negative self-talk and perceptions. Sometimes I even start feeling rejected here...and then I wonder where th...
|
Raven Juniper
|
14
|
3541
|
|
|
|
Group in Inverness?
(Preview)
Hi there, I have an alcoholic mother and after recently visiting home I have been struggling with the deteriorating situation and was wondering if anyone on here went to the Inverness al-anon group at new craigs on saturday? Do I need to call up in advance or just turn up? Kind Regards ...
|
frustratedteengirl
|
13
|
881
|
|
|
|
why is she not telling me?
(Preview)
I am so sorry to have to post this. My mom is not telling me things I think I would like to know before she does them. Is it too much to ask? She started w/ not telling me that she was sending her car down to CA where my relatives are for my niece. I knew that she was going to do it but I had to find out on FB the day it wa...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
4
|
392
|
|
|
|
My mother.
(Preview)
Well, this forum is very new to me and I'm not sure what I'm doing, so please bear with me xx I am a 17 yr old girl and my mother is an alcoholic. Now, this may seem horrendous since she has medical issues, and I am supposed to be caring, but.... I hold so much resentment against her, I couldn't care less if she d...
|
frustratedteengirl
|
12
|
501
|
|
|
|
Way out of a circle?
(Preview)
Hello everyone, I'm new to this forum, not to the subject. My bf is with the AA for the 8th month. We've got ups and downs. He's got his moods - before drinking, during drinking, now... emotions.. they affect our relationship the most. It may be rooted in his childhood, the insecurity, low or no self-est...
|
Pipi
|
8
|
386
|
|
|
|
My HP and Home
(Preview)
Hi all. As you know, I went to be with my Dad and got stranded in a motel room for more than a week. Yesterday, I was struggling with anxiety because the weather report for today and beyond it was more snow and blowing and drifting snow. Today, I awakened, did what I normally do for my program work, watch...
|
grateful2be
|
14
|
305
|
|
|
|
somethings changed and sorta hurts.
(Preview)
Want to keep this simple. The man I consider a friend became more as you know. Then things changed in his life so he could not continue our plans to meet and hopefully be a couple. I shared my pain here. You guys were real and told me the raw hurting truths. I know now I should have said ok sounds great, but go a...
|
Debilyn
|
25
|
732
|
|
|
|
Story Time! A car battery
(Preview)
So after so many manipulations, I caved and answered the phone when my ex ABF called. (Via text) First it was poor me, and my absent father called me today. Then when that didnt work it was anger! Im coming for my bed! Then when that didnt work it was overly concerned for my safety time... and finally I answ...
|
breamanic665
|
6
|
319
|
|
|
|
5pm comes to quick !!!
(Preview)
I watch the clock and wonder what will it be tonight? Dinner is ready, the house is clean, things are put away, Ohhh shoot it's 4:30 and the back deck and driveway have not been shoveled, I throw his coat on, boots and mittens, I know I don't have time to do it all but if I get a good part of the deck done at least...
|
Miamamamia
|
7
|
475
|
|
|
|
Step 11
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t56556147/alanon-step-11/
|
hotrod
|
0
|
283
|
|
|
|
re: Al-a non meetings
(Preview)
Thanks everyone for responding during this time. Whats hard about all this is the trust is gone. How do you ever build that again? Now he's going to AA meetings, said he was sorry. Even is recognizing he needs treatment. But what really pisses me off, is this is all about HIM. And what he needs. Never mi...
|
tsuthe1
|
9
|
441
|
|
|
|
Being where I am suppose to be ..
(Preview)
Yesterday I had an urge to go to the open AA meeting I do attend and really enjoy. It's at 7am, so being there is a choice especially when the weather is the way it has been in the recent weeks there is nothing like 32 degrees feeling like a heat wave!! LOL .. it won't last and that's ok .. still .. it was somet...
|
SerenityRUS
|
9
|
397
|
|
|
|
Please share some wisdom
(Preview)
I feel so tiny against this disease. i don't know how to be me anymore. It seems like I am to change so i don't step on the alcoholic toes. I feel so lost. I know this is what I feel in the moment. i do have a sponsor that has helped me so long. It took months to get pass denial. I go to meetings and I want to...
|
hopes314
|
5
|
384
|
|
|
|
Check in
(Preview)
Hello I'm just checking in I'm hoping to attend a meeting tonight I need some positive energy . My depresstion has lighten up a bit. I took time off of reading Alaon books and just searching for me. I was hoping after 4 months of no insurance and no medication things woukd get better it seams things take a t...
|
Wisdom67
|
5
|
188
|
|
|
|
RE: IS HE AN AGENT- LIKE 007?
(Preview)
I am new to this. Just found my husbands stash hes been hiding for over 2 years. Tons of vodka, beer and even a porn video. I;m devastated. We have been married for almost 26 years coming May. I am beyond angry, and deeply saddened. Feel as if 1/2 my life has been a phasod. I;m numb.Cant feel my hands. I moved...
|
tsuthe1
|
9
|
587
|
|
|
|
Hurry up and wait!
(Preview)
Very excited today I apply for the job I'm currently working, everyone is glad I am back. The hours would be really great it will open some other opportunities for me in terms of trying school again now that it's not so crazy. So wish me luck .. interview is today! I have court Thursday .. oh the joys of m...
|
SerenityRUS
|
15
|
355
|
|
|
|
Being Hemmed in - A Hockey Team - Liquor abounds
(Preview)
Hello, all. My Dad was transferred from the hospital to a skilled nursing facility on Wednesday - not far from the pile up on the interstate on Thursday. Due to continued snowdrifts, visibility, ice and snow covered roads and the urging of law enforcement to stay off the roads - plus the long distan...
|
grateful2be
|
17
|
2817
|
|
|
|
Went to my first meeting tonight and am a newcomer here...
(Preview)
And I'm still needing some answers, help, anything. I'm planning on going to more meetings because i feel they can really help me, but for now, i would like to hear from some veterans on some advice to get me through the week. Some background info is, I was with my boyfriend for 2 years, we broke up for a ye...
|
Akavanagh
|
8
|
272
|
|
|
|
Bad news today
(Preview)
AH got some bad news today and I worry that it will be the trigger or excuse for him to drink again. He is so sad, and it breaks my heart to see him this way. Unlike past situations though, I am keeping the focus on me, being supportive but not controlling, taking care of my needs first. Please keep us both in y...
|
ParisMemories
|
13
|
470
|
|
|
|
GUILT!!!
(Preview)
So after years of living with his addiction, it was a year ago that I filed for divorce. It turned out that was his rock bottom because he finally got clean and sober so he wouldn't lose his family. We separated for about 6 or seven months and he was homeless when he wasn't in rehab. Anyway, I ended up taki...
|
imom
|
7
|
460
|
|
|
|
Tired
(Preview)
Good Morning Everyone Yesterday was a down day for me. So down I was at a point I was thinking I just didn't want to live. I am tired of my life. I'm OK today at least. Why am I thinking like this I do not know. I'm not suicidal but I sometimes just feel like I'm so tired I just want it to go away. I know I nee...
|
Cathyinaz
|
19
|
553
|
|
|
|
update
(Preview)
I am going to make this quick really I am! My cousin was in a hospital for a week. You all might figure out what kind of hospital. She finally after the week was past she told me where she was & that she wasn't in just any hospital. I am feeling better. I figure it must have been the molasses. It was in my sys...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
2
|
220
|
|
|
|
still so confuse
(Preview)
So confused !! So here I am almost a week with you guys and a bit more with my f2f meetings, I find this site very uplifting, and have met and had some great conversations in the chat room, however I am still so lost as to finding out if I am in the right place, I'm not happy, I have not been happy for years, live i...
|
Miamamamia
|
13
|
484
|
|
|
|
Maybe it's the winter doldrums
(Preview)
I don't know about you but I've been feeling very disheartened lately. My efforts in finding a second job over the past four months feel in vain - not one call back. The financial fallout from the divorce is forcing me to file bankruptcy this year - very disappointing. My efforts in finding a roommat...
|
abbyalana
|
6
|
516
|
|
|
|
So sorry about the meeting last night, my computer went down right before I was to start chairing
(Preview)
Thank you John for coming in and chairing. Robin ks
|
mercedes1959
|
2
|
169
|
|
|
|
Whats your price tag worth!
(Preview)
Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. If you aren't being treated with Love and Respect, check your price tag. Maybe you marked yourself down. Get off the clearance rack and get behind the glass where they keep the valuables !...
|
Beatrice
|
12
|
777
|
|