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This sucks so much less than I expected....
(Preview)
I'm actually a little shocked by how much I am enjoying this. Because my week was filled with "doings" and achievements I felt OK with just enjoying the peace today. I lay outside in the sun for most of it listening to the birds and just "being in the moment". I thought..you know w...
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missmeliss
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10
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564
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What will I find?
(Preview)
I fully understand that I am completely and utterly powerless over alcohol. I know what it is, and I know and understand the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual pain that this powerful drug can inflict. I understand that I am powerless and I accept this. With this new understanding, I know Go...
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cloudyskies
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8
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429
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can alcoholism be compared to cancer?
(Preview)
Lately, ive heard alcoholism being compared to cancer or dementia or other diseases. Can it really be compared to other diseases that are completely outwith the persons control? Ive heard someone ask, would you leave someone with parkinsons or ms? Probably not but I left someone with alcoholism, t...
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el-cee
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32
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903
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on vacation with my A
(Preview)
Hi all. I am at the beginning of a week's vacation with my A. I am pleased to report that so far there is no drinking. There is way too much eating. No gambling either yet. I guess 2 out of 3 aint bad. I have a very draining job and I have been looking forward to being away from work. I thought I would want...
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Lyne
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6
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359
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Sunday 8/24/2014 Spiritual Story: Connected through Nature's Beauty
(Preview)
Sunday 8/24/2014 Spiritual Story: Connected through Nature's Beauty Meeting scheduled in the Al-Anon chat room. Today's Spiritual Story is:Connected through Nature's Beauty. Today's Spiritual Question is: Do I see the beauty found in nature? The website link to the group meeting room is htt...
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Tampa
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0
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161
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lost and hopeless
(Preview)
So I have been a relationship with my boyfriend for almost a year now. I have know him for about 8 years though. Everything was perfectly fine. I knew he had a history with drinking and had DUI's but he had finally gotten help and cleaned up. He was everything and more I could ask for in a man. He is the man I wa...
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ejriney
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5
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518
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Guidance for sponsor selection
(Preview)
Hi, I've decided it's time to ask a sponsor into my life. I have been looking off and on for a little while, but still have basically two gentlemen that I found at one of my first meetings. I don't have good access to a lot of meetings, I was hoping to broaden the field a bit, but I don't think I will be able t...
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KennyFenderjazz
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10
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455
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Keep putting those eggs in that one basket
(Preview)
Just feeling sad tonight and recognizing my urges to use other people to feel good about myself and validate myself, mostly other men who apparently, according to my sick psyche, are the most important people out there to tell me just how worthy I am or am not. I'm in a situation right now where I feel lik...
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Aloha
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7
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385
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Help.. he is trying to manipulate me
(Preview)
So last night I got on alanon chat and my A went and slept in another bedroom yelling out that I don't care about him anymore and I am game playing. This morning he said he was too sick to get up and come with me as we had planned to go and get out grandson. I asked him if I could do anything for him and he said th...
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shosh18
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6
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471
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how do i begin to let go?
(Preview)
Hi im new here and not to sure how this works. But im so lost and i dont even know where to begin. I Will Ramble If I Allow.myself So Ill Cut.it Short. My Husbands An Alcoholic has Been for 17 years We Have been Married For Five And have two amazing Children. I Made Him Leave Two Weeks Agao and i Dont know How To...
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jillian
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3
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508
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In all the excitement...
(Preview)
I forgot to say, I started my new course last week. (mental health/drug and alcohol). It felt SO GOOD to get up, DRIVE myself somewhere and spend the days with other grown-ups doing grown-up stuff! (Well actually, there was an awful lot of giggling and at one point we built towers out of colored straws...
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missmeliss
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10
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449
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Just fled my holiday accomodation.
(Preview)
We are abroad in a beach Villa. H has been drinking from the airport, on the plane and here non stop for 3 days now. I have been minding my own business and leaving him alone. Tonight he came in our apartment drunk and as daughter woke up and asked for water he did give it to her. Than kept talking and kissi...
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Luiza
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17
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524
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Do I belong here?
(Preview)
Last night my husband came home from a ball game having had a lot to drink. He says 5 beers, willing to bet it was more. What put me over the top was that he drove himself and two others home. My SIL call her brother the highest functioning A she knows. He is a professional, owns his own bizness and is a directo...
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me123
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1
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202
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Made my mip meeting last nite
(Preview)
Felt good also to have been at a meeting,Im anxious to get to going to my FTf meetings,I found a ph.no to call to find the exact location of the FTf meeting.hugs ,I'm grate full for all your replies to get to a meeting and your pushing me to keep the focus on myself and to take care of ME! It's wired that when I s...
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lookingup
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8
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314
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Is it Time To Go?
(Preview)
I have been struggling all day with this question. Last night had a talk with AH. He has been acting hinky since weekend. I asked him about it and he said he was thinking of leaving our house. Then the next thing he said was will you take me back if I do leave.. What am I to make of that? I reminded him tha...
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Hullibee
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21
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760
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Sunny day
(Preview)
Lovely bright, sunny day here in the UK. Sat quietly enjoying the warmth and motivation I am getting from reading these boards. I had quite a few maintenance jobs that needed doing around my home. I am feeling very blessed as I can hear the builder I have employed to do them working away. The work ...
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SunshineGirl
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7
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426
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the folk singer alcoholic….uggh
(Preview)
I've been up on all night crying, finally went to sleep, dreamed of the house we said we'd always built, making music in it with him. As he stomped around on guitar like a kid, I tried to accompany him w/ a tiny broken violin, and it was the most frustrating thing. I could hear the melody, and could squeak ou...
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astallaslions
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4
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462
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Finding a FTf meeting
(Preview)
Where do I or can I go or call to get directions to the meeting that's held in my next town over?today seems to be going peaceful just hope it stays this way for now anyway,I know and expect chaos and drama will come again just need to be prepared mentally I'm anxious to get started going to FTf now and I'm anx...
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lookingup
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10
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341
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Former client overdosed and died
(Preview)
This should not be a surprise and I guess it's not. This comes from the 8 months I worked with adult clients in Rehab. Most of them were Heroin addicts and this one was as well. 26 years old. I worked really hard with him, his family... He had issues with depression as well. He could do okay in rehab, b...
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pinkchip
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18
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583
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Acceptance ? No way.
(Preview)
I am new to all this, attended my first Al-anon meeting last week, my second meeting just last evening. One of the common themes members talk about is learning to accept our loved ones disease and realize we can't fix them. I am going to be frankly honest and strongly disagree with that thinking. I...
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Cooper
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21
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758
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Green Car ..
(Preview)
LOL .. I KNEW this was going to happen .. he showed up in the green car and I had set a boundary that while the car was NOT in his name he would NOT be driving the kids around in it. I'm sorry ... someone else's car and I don't know this person and so on. So I laughed to myself .. as I walked out before the kids did...
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SerenityRUS
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14
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450
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Cathy? Update please.
(Preview)
We haven't heard anything since yesterday. Are you doing okay?
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grateful2be
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5
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348
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Halt
(Preview)
I'm hungry,angry,lonesome,and tired ,what next?ive been cooking cooked a great supper abf has been sick with cold but eating like a horse,he said he was feeling better this morning,little if any contact with him,he lies in bed for most part.i guess all the pills he is taking to get better has him tire...
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lookingup
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3
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259
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weird memory
(Preview)
My dear neighbor texted me today if I had seen her 15 year old dog Ginger. Gin has been coming to my place for 14 years, a yellow lab. We share her. (c: They gave up paying someone to watch their house and her as she would just come to me. One night late I get the is Ginger there call. We were out with flashlight...
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Debilyn
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4
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359
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when someone shows you who they are believe it!
(Preview)
With alchoholics not in recovery they become very many people, thats my experience anyway, my problem is trying to make them into just one personality, one that suits me, pointing out someone elses short falls or highlighting thier traits is not nice and very cruel I have done that, trying to gently g...
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Katy
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8
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399
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Needing to vent
(Preview)
Sorry,but I'm needing to vent ,abf mistress or whatever she is called his cell ph I went ballistic ,abf swore up and down that he hadnt talked to her or anything in weeks,he said he was selling his phone tomorrow but I think he is haveing to sell it for money to get to work I dunno,I'm still upset about it a...
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lookingup
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4
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261
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Need help sorting through the yuck!
(Preview)
I am trying to sort through some issues. One that is not settling no matter how much I pray and continue to tell myself it's just not my business. I have come to find out that A got involved with a female counsellor at detox centre and has gone away with her overnight and continued to carry on a relationship...
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Mari1978
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10
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536
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I am trying my best not to have a serious meltdown
(Preview)
Hi. I am feeling so overwhelmed, lonely and worried. My second child is off to college. I know it's a good thing. But now it's only me and my youngest 8 yr old at home. I am trying very very hard to look at the good things. youngest child just put her stuff in older sister's closet and drawers. It was cute, and...
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Newlife girl
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7
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360
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Peaks and valleys big time.....
(Preview)
Sooo the last 6 months I have fallen in love, my sponsor died, got to go to Texas, I broke my right arm, my car died and I had to buy a new one, the newer car is in the shop and needs a new transmission after owning it 90 days, I have had some amazing weekends with the new boyfriend and our kids, I am working my pr...
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Breakingfree
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15
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568
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Why I drank
(Preview)
This is a poem I came across in AA meetings. I posted it on the AA boards but I thought some of you might like to read it cuz this is what you see going on right in front your your face. It sort of helps to understand alcoholism I guess. For most alcoholics these things are all on different continuums and on...
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pinkchip
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19
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906
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why is the man and the disease seperate?
(Preview)
Someone mentioned this lately that the man is seperate from the disease. Im not sure I get it. When the man is drunk, hes still the man, when hes sober hes still a sober sick man so what part is the man? being sober doesnt make him a different man surely. I mean how would you even know the man if hes being an a...
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el-cee
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21
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673
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Another night of anxiety & no sleep- my story.
(Preview)
Hi there. this is my first time posting here, tho I've been accessing sign hire for a while. My AH is my husband of 8yrs, been together 15. He was always a big drinker, I didn't really think much of it when we first met as we were both young & enjoyed the party scene. It's only since we've had the kids &...
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Tash2
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16
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610
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Dating
(Preview)
I am wondering what the protocol is for dating another al anon member. I have been single for 5 years and feel ready to date. There is a man in a meeting I attend who is age appropriate and emotionally available.
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Amg70
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5
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690
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Feeling Lonely and Anxious
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I just needed to connect with people who probably can identify with the way I am feeling right now. As some of you know who read my previous post several days ago, I have broken up with my ABF. I have to live in his home for the next 6 weeks. I am still waiting to hear whether I have gotten the a...
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AshleyA
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2
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299
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why I have gone back home.
(Preview)
I never learn things quickly and I have to do them over and over until they sink in, I suppose I am just needing to touch the hot stove again, my husband was a big drinker when we first met, I think i had one year with him before he fianally stopped and within that year I had found alanon and so began the unrave...
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Katy
|
3
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372
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|
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Sobriety - a choice or not?
(Preview)
Why would someone who admits they are an alcoholic, who achieved sobriety for 10 years after almost dying, continue to regularly drink after their first relapse 4 years ago? This is on and off. He has apparently had periods where he has stayed sober for 6 months, but in the 18 months I've known him he h...
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Flossy
|
11
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647
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I've realized why I'm single!
(Preview)
I used to think, when I wasn't in a relationship, that I was single because: I wasn't good enough for a relationship. No one would find me appealing or worthwhile. I didn't deserve to be in a relationship. I was just a loser and everyone could tell. But I'm single right now and I suddenly realized why! I'...
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Mattie
|
18
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691
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I was praying for rain
(Preview)
You know I was always praying for rain and today HP answered me BIG TIME. Phoenix got hit so hard I thought it was going to wash away. Up here in New River we got 4 1/2 inches in about a hour. The streets were being scraped but the mud and rock is everywhere. Coming down a street to get home is a dip through a...
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Cathyinaz
|
8
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467
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Another step
(Preview)
I am always amazed at how my HP works. This week was quite eventful, so I apologize if this is a little long. My AH and I have been separated since January & we were separated 5 months last year. I had hope that he had hit his bottom and would seek help this go around. He almost crashed and killed our 6...
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Tossed Salad
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9
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320
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Needing a sponser
(Preview)
I'm needing a onser to help me with my step work,I'm been trying to do them all by myself but I was told that I can't do them by myself.anybody here want to volunteer for the job ?thanks
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lookingup
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14
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580
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How to handle ABF who has been talking the talk about treatment without going "co" / how to talk to his friend?
(Preview)
My second query to the forum, shortly after the first. That one will give you background. My ABF and I had a "come to jesus" moment six weeks ago after he was arrested for drunk& disorderly on the Fourth and he kept drinking 36+ hours after being released from jail. I wasn't directly im...
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nichtdaisy
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6
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490
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|
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Thankful
(Preview)
Particularly thankful for the gift of Al-anon today. Because of what I have learnt and practised, I was able to detach with love and remove myself from the crisis that my AH was busy trying to create to drink at. I saw it for what it was, his stuff not mine. I declined his invitation to a fight and pit...
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SunshineGirl
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10
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386
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thankful for program
(Preview)
My friend has dug herself in deeper she borrowed another $500 this weekend from a coworker and continues to lie for everything. I have blocked her number from my phone. I know she is miserable but I have to draw the line somewhere. I'm grateful for learning abt boundaries and when to separate myself fro...
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texasgal
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6
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246
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so why didn't he....
(Preview)
I have shared all over fb this, If someone has a life saving rope to help them, if they have a broken arm, they can do nothing to save themselves. Depression, Addiction, mental illness, your brain is broken, compromised. It cannot think correctly. How does anyone not get that? if one drinks his brain is...
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Debilyn
|
8
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590
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shove me into shallow water before I get too deep....
(Preview)
OMGosh, I just realized something. It really hit me. HE called me today. The man I loved and love, liked. I still like him. He sends me an email off and on sharing some important event. (throwing me scraps?) Then months go by. I don't email him much. Its like why bother and he is married......still........
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Debilyn
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18
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5903
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Courage needed
(Preview)
I will need courage to fight my dry ah on selling our property. He thought it was a slam dunk of paper changing hands only till my lawyer looked at tax returns and said there is no way either of you can afford to pay that mtg Alone. He finally got his copy of letter this weekend. I am very nervous. I have an appr...
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Mirandac
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13
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522
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This is getting old.
(Preview)
S -- Edited by missmeliss on Tuesday 19th of August 2014 02:33:07 AM
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missmeliss
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18
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683
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I thought I would be able to go on my holidays without needing to write a thread before departing...
(Preview)
So, we all have been off work/school for 7 days now. I have to say that surprisingly it was a very good week indeed. I was dreading it if I am honest. Husband drank moderately and behaved well through out the week. He did activities with daughter from his own initiative and was more than happy looking afte...
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Luiza
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9
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490
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Update!
(Preview)
Hello Mip so after spending a few weeks away from home and I started to feel I needed to bring some things to a close, I have been lucky that my husband has remained friendly and loving in my absence and allowed me to come and go freely without obstruction or control, however he has not asked me about anyth...
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Katy
|
5
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326
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Giving Back
(Preview)
now is an often thing, a usual thing and a natural practice. How would I have ever thought it would have come to this as a milestone in my own recovery. I came in to Al-Anon "all buss up" as we say in pigeon...I came in pupule or in translation, crazy. I was angry and rageful and uncaring ab...
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Jerry F
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10
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523
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AA and Al-Anon Convention this Weekend.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone! So I ended up going to the convention and had a wonderful time. Got my cup full of great speakers and E/S/H. Amazingly enough because once again I decided to adjust my attitude and my mouth it went well with my AH. We talked and laughed and cried together. There was no pettiness, arguing noth...
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Flower49
|
5
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382
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A peaceful day
(Preview)
Today went smooth ,my abf joined me at my friends house for grilling out,it was great,I enjoyed myself my abf was looking through his phone as usualcand I walked over to look too he closed it ,I told him that he wasn't right he said plz don't start let's not start,I can start drama with him cause of my resen...
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lookingup
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24
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670
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Just what I needed...lol
(Preview)
Lol, so, my daughter is "Art Captain" at her school. She's quite a talented little drawer and painter like her father (I can string words together but my visual art is abysmal, even my stick-figures suck). So last night she mentions to me, "mum, I have completed all of the "art ta...
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missmeliss
|
7
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348
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Can't seem to let go...
(Preview)
Hi everybody. I'm new to this forum, and I'm new to Al-Anon. I've been to two meetings, and with my hectic schedule I plan to attend more. I need all the support I can get. And I need help, I'm willing to do anything. It's nice to be in the presence of people who understand. My alcoholic is my husband of 6 yea...
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hope6147
|
10
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744
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Two Ppl, Two Programs...right?
(Preview)
Hi there! I'm struggling with a situation which I think boils down to setting healthy boundaries in a relationship, along with keeping my nose in my own business. Looking for some E/H/S on this... I'm engaged to my AF, and my sponsor has been amazing at guiding me through my Al-Anon program. My AF is in h...
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Advocate_For_Steve
|
5
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6386
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Crazy Making!
(Preview)
It happened again yesterday, it's insane. Is he intentionally trying to crazy make?! I was heading to a friends babies 1st birthday party yesterday when out of the blue (ex)ABF sends me a message saying he was at an AA meeting. Now I've not known him to attend a Saturday morning meeting EVER in the 18...
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Flossy
|
17
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670
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Feeling hopeful
(Preview)
Hi everyone After my pretty desperate post earlier this week, I wanted to share that I'm feeling more hopeful today! Not of my AH not drinking anymore (let go of that a while ago) but of my ability to manage my reactions better. Don't get me wrong, I know I still have a really long way to go, & I expect se...
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Tash2
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3
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337
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Itchy Skin
(Preview)
Has anyone come across their As having itchy skin? My (ex)ABF has had this thing for the past year where he constantly scratches his side overnight, to the extent that it wakes me up. He doesn't even know he's doing it. I've said to him about it and he claims it's to do with my cats but he's also done it wh...
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Flossy
|
11
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494
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today I matter
(Preview)
Hi All, I have been to an AA convention today with Al anon participation. My ABf is active again after two years sobriety. I stuck to my boundary after he stayed out over night and he moved out. I can not believe how much I have changed, I have detached and I am grabbing on to al anon with both hands. Meeti...
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Tracy
|
9
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405
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Live and Let Live
(Preview)
Today, I got to practice LIVE, AND LET LIVE. I was home for lunch, with my son, and a knock on the door. My son answered and I hear him ask for my AH. My son said he wasn't here.... Anyway, it turns out it is a man here to mow our yard. Seriously! lol! They measure our lawns in square feet; not acres. He has only...
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blessed
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8
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649
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