Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

To all our members on the East Coast · grateful2be

Many prayers for all of you and for your families and neighbors, too! As the blizzard makes itself known, I hope you all stay warm and safe, have plenty of food and can stay connected to us, too. -- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 26th of January 2015 05:04:25 PM

Screaming Barbie · Screaming Barbie

I understand about boundaries in general, but in some situation, I don't get how that general principle is applied. If someone was breaking into a neighbor's house, and loading all their stuff into their van, I would call the cops. I would not say "None of my business - no one is being abused.&q...

NobleStone · NobleStone

I'm sure you must get a few of these every day...... here's mine. I've been with my wife/partner for 10 years. I came to the relationship 'innocent' of the dangers of Alchohol, in the early days we'd meet, we'd both drink, pretty much like everyone else. Alarm bells started ringing about a year in when a...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

This is my first summary for the ODAT. Since I have been attending meetings for over 29 years I thought I might try tbis. It says that family members sometimes come to Al anon out of desperation. They think they are going to get the alcoholic sober. In reality the purpose of coming is to gain serenity &am...

AWSmith · AWSmith

So... here in the nice city of Huntsville, wife came home TRASHED. A nasty fight broke out. She attacked me. Cops were called... twice in one night. 5 kids. Was pregnant with twins but cancer recently took them from her. Huge alcoholic wife. 2 dui's. Whatever. Cops didn't believe anything about...

neshema2 · neshema2

daughter #2 is bleeding b/c she has been working too much..... I called her yesterday to just get udated on family news and she was delighted to hear from me..."mommie, I love and miss you" I told her that i missed her too, but was gonna protect me from her behaviours, but not ever stop loving...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Whew. You might remember my house-mate lady person that I stayed with for 9 weeks was having a pretty up and down time with her son etc and unfortunately a lot of her unhappiness ended up being directed towards myself and my daughter. In the end it became quite nasty and, knowing that I had kept my side of t...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi MIP FamilyI have been posting a summary of the daily reading to the Board for the past few days . I believe it is helpful to start he day with an alanon thought. If anyone else is up early and would like to post the summary please do so. Please note , we are unable to post or copy the entire page fr...

Rumblefish · Rumblefish

Hi all. Another newbie. In this case, an AW. This is a day, I just want to holler. That's all I have for now. Maybe more later.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am changing but my Ah is not. I really believe this today. He is stuck in a rut. I am enjoying my friends & he thinks that they won't be there if I really need them. He has no clue about real friendships. Even his dad said to him that you only have one true friend & the rest are acquaintances.

onestein · onestein

I have 4 friends who are drunk and stoned; I have been sober 31 years and 25 years in Alanon; they don't want help or want to stop; It looks like I have to drop these friendships because I just can't tolerate drunk people any more.

Bostonpugwoman · Bostonpugwoman

I have not spoken to the guy I was dating since he sent me a long apology over a week ago. (By the way, the apology was REALLY good although as I've stated before, he is really good at apologizing.) I told him I felt better that he had apologized and agreed with him that now is not the time for us to build a r...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

Todays Courage to Change reading is about the 12th step, especially the phrase that says Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps. As I read this page, I thought thats a fine kettle of fish! Ive volunteered to do this reading, and I havent yet done the 12th step! Then I realized that...

Wisdom67 · Wisdom67

Just want to say good morning to all hope you stay safe keep warm and get everything you Need I'm so grateful to be alive today and happy and life is what you make of it .if you don't like it change it you have that option to do so just drop it off give it to god . Live for yourself today because you count

Wisdom67 · Wisdom67

Just checking in to say hello . Still looking for work still keeping my spirits up . Glad today is a new day I'm grateful for what God has given me , I did makes some minor changes, I did get rid of ppl who were not good for me to.be around there true color final peeked threw and my head is clear now , I able to see t...

mlang · mlang

This is my first post. I've been trying to figure out why I am struggling with removing myself from the situations my husband's drinking creates. Why I feel the need to constantly text or call to make sure he's okay and beg him not to drive. Or why I beg him constantly to stop or point out how this is hu...

oceanpine · oceanpine

My AH is obsessed with the fact we haven't been intimate for a long time. This week, he has started saying "it's been 100 days" and he is saying it over and over... linking it to other things... like maybe he would do more errands if he had sex more often. Or whatever. About 100 days ago, he cros...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I have my advanced skills final tomorrow morning and wanted to practice at the college lab today, but woke up nauseous and very dizzy along with light headed. I went to the urgent care and the Dr. thinks I have an inner ear infection, so he put me on an antibiotic and something for the dizzy spells. I reall...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup! That is the punch line. Can't remember the rest of the joke.

gillygilly · gillygilly

Hello - I'm new to this group and not even sure this is where I'm meant to be. My partner doesn't drink. He hasn't drunk for 2 years. He stopped himself because he knew he couldn't handle it and hasn't attended more than a couple of AA meetings. He says he doesn't need them. However, he has pretty severe...

mjferg · mjferg

I try to be a good person and I want to be treated with respect.I have been having some problems with my landlord, she doesn't want to fix things.I had a leak in my hot water tank which resulted in a bad mold problem in and around a cabinet,it could also be behind the cabinet or under the floor,she told me t...

glad · glad

As posted today... I have a right to want what I want and feel the way I feel. I do not have to act on those feelings but I do not have to hide them from myself as they are part of me. I'm feeling a good bit "slippery" lately - meaning I'm feeling self pity, it maybe my biggest flaw-or rather greates...

sadsister1979 · sadsister1979

I'm struggling with whether to commit my brother. He is 51 and has been in residential treatment twice over the past 5 years. He lives alone, is unemployed, his house is out of control and is declining steadily. He falls a a lot and is bruised all over his body. He also has a history of seizures relate...

hotrod · hotrod

Thought provoking readings today in both the C2C and ODAT Courage to Change speaks about keeping the focus on others and not paying attention to our own needs and wants. It points out that we neglected ourselves because we did not think we were worthy and did want others to see us as we were. I can id...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

This morning I am feeling lonely. No one is up. Slept bad because my thoughts were racing. Now I have to face another day. I think I am going to try to organize some stuff & declutter my mind. Good day is yet to come if I let it.

andromeda · andromeda

Without going into a long story, I just want to vent over the fact that now my AH claims he wants to buy a house. 3 days ago he wanted to stay here and buy me out. I found a rental, they are willing to work with my unemployed self, and I was ready to sign the lease today and now AH throws out the, "I've foun...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I need some advice on how to break away from a dry drunk does it have to be really bad or can I gradually stop it.

mjferg · mjferg

I received a text from my daughter-in-law last night,my son left her and is asking for a divorce.They have 2 kids.She is hurting so bad,I really feel for her.I love them both and I told her I will be here for both of them.There aren't any bad feelings between us and I know I will be able to see my grandchil...

neshema2 · neshema2

on December 8th when I drug myself to the clinic hardly able to walk...needed help in the clinic to get around and to get up on the table, etc., for my exam, and finally got that shot in the muscle to put me out of my pain, the doctor while examining me said that that was one of the worst lower back muscle seizu...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C January 24 is a powerful page that reflects on the topic of Feelings. It stresses the importance of really feeling our feelings and not pretending. It suggests that we learn how to be honest with ourselves and stop trying to fit into someone else mold. It asos points out that Al-Anon doe...

Helpangel · Helpangel

hi all! I need some advice on how to detach from my ah who is 50 days sober but is hard to deal with. He works where I work yet goes in late all time complaining he can't sleep and then whines a lot about how he hates going to meetings all the time. If I don't say anything he gets mad if I do he gets mad. This recover...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

A posting from Andromeda reminded me of something. I played bass in a band until a couple of years ago where our keyboard player wrote a lot of originals. One of my favorites was a song called "My Reality is Skewed", it is about how our realities are skewed because we are spiritual beings in a...

glad · glad

I remember being all obsessed with the alcoholic and going on and on about how he was doing and someone saying to me, ok but how are YOU doing? ...That really sat be back a bit.. like a "cow looking at a new gate" is what we might say here in Texas. What did that mean "How was I doing" I'...

neshema2 · neshema2

Grateful challenge for Saturday.....I am grateful for the following: The lessons I learned about perseverance and keeping up the work and giving outcome over to HP That I came clean with my High School classmates about my being bullied and shamed b/c I had a terrible family and now they are reaching o...

flagbabe83 · flagbabe83

So as you may know, my AH (who is partial denial) stopped drinking for 30 days on his own to prove to me that he "doesn't have a problem." You and I know that this won't work. What I find is that even though he is currently sober and a dry drunk, I keep treating him like he is still drinking. I feel li...

John · John

This time of year is when everything comes due on the web sites annual expenses, so if you have the ability please consider making a 5-10 dollar donation to help offset the cost of this site. It is important that the site remains self supporting through its member contributions, and the burden of expe...

serenity47 · serenity47

It has been a very trying week. As I expected daughter lost job ( the 3rd ) in two months for I guess not showing up the next day I don't really know. I have been nutso worrying about her. Trying very hard to read my books and messages here and praying furiously to my hp to help me and her and attend online me...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It is bad enough that I am bone tired.I am still rechecking my every move. I think I ccan handle this one day at a time. It has been years since he left me on a total episode. For those who don't knowh has bp gambling addict & alcoholic. He has been sober years away from gambling & drinking & quit...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I already know what I'm going to do .. lol .. I guess I just need to read it and think for a min about it. My children are on her insurance now, I don't care I'm just glad they finally have insurance. Honestly it costs her nothing more so it's all good. XAH has insurance however not under her policy. So he h...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am concerned because we have to get an alternator for our car & we have to spend more time together. I won't project but I hope we get along after having all these episodes. I will call a friend in the program if I need to & pray. I am just grateful for yesterday because we didn't argue & have a s...

Hopefull15 · Hopefull15

Ive found lots of encouragement and hope in the posts on this board but am now serious about taking things to the next level. I cant seem to follow the step board and think I would probably work my program best with some help. I go to meetings once a week because thats all my schedule will allow. Its always a...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Something Alanon has taught me is how to have a life as I really did not. I was teased at last nights meeting that I hadn't been coming to due to scheduling conflicts that I finally showed up .. lol. Well, part of the wonderful part of Alanon is learning to live the life I have vs just talking about it. My k...

grateful2be · grateful2be

grateful2be · grateful2be

It is January 24th in New Zealand. Time to wish you a Happy Birthday, David!

grateful2be · grateful2be

Being retired with no responsibilities has been a new experience for me. It has been a delightfully new experience with many reasons for gratitude every day for me. During the winter season, it has also brought some real challenges. One of them being loneliness as I have been snowed in or iced in or...

Abg321 · Abg321

Hello all my boyfriend finally came clean to me last Monday and told me he was an alcoholic..he basically disappeared the weekend prior and went on a drinking bing, I felt lost... I cried and couldn't understand what I did wrong... Well when he finally told me, it all seemed to make sense....I wish I co...

missmeliss · missmeliss

What a day. I had so much fun! And also I was aware of the fact that I was having fun and the huge contrast to myself even 12 months ago and I was oh so grateful for it. So I suppose i was kinda introspective while I was outwardly enjoying my day for all it was worth. Daughter's friends and their mother did not sh...

Spur · Spur

I haven't visited the board for a couple months. I'm feeling like I have no direction. Reading on the forum tonight I came across a couple of posts that I'd like to quote here and comment on because they touch on what I'm dealing with at this point. Betty wrote, in reference to working Step One: "...

hotrod · hotrod

ODAT for today emphasizes that learning how to use the Al-Anon program, in every part of our life is not a simple matter. The reading point out that walking the walk, in every part of our life, requires more than going to a meeting now and then. . It compares learning the alanon program to deciding t...

Flower49 · Flower49

Hey everyone! TGIF.....so as you know I had my 50th b-day on Monday. My AH who has been sober 9 months and who has never given me a card, present, bday anything for the last 7 years decided he would take me to dinner. Good! Nope bad, he came in late from work because he decided to stay around with the guys and d...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

My lease is up next month on my apartment. The complex has been pretty good...one noisy neighbor who didn't last too long...but now they've allowed a family with a Pitbull to move in! I am so upset. I know people here who might have pitbulls will defend them...but facts don't lie. I don't trust them. I as...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Things are all over the place. I'm so happy to be moving in to a new place, stressed about the move. Pleased my daughter is getting everything she needs to start high school, stressed that so much has been paid for by my mother. I discussed this with her today, as she as insisting everything had to be paid u...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

The last couple of days my Ah have been arguing more than usual. I dealt w/ his abuse by yelling because at the time I thought that was the only way he would really hear me.So, I did the next right thing & called program friends, texted & called my sponsor. One example of something he said was that h...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

I've been working in the NICU for almost 25 years. My husband got fired from the same unit last March. I still try to cope with my feelings over the issue of him being fired. I still see the manager who "helped" in his firing. I have mixed feelings about it. I was reading online about nurse burno...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

My AH and I have discussed this over the years. There are days we can look at each other and think "what was I thinking?" and then there are days we can look and think "wow, he/she really looks good". When I was angry and feeling like there was 'nothing' there, I would stop and remind...

mjferg · mjferg

I didn't think I could do much of anything, but I am coming to realize a lot of things about myself and that is I really don't know too much about my true self,if that makes any sense.I am in school and making straight A's in all classes,Don't get me wrong,I am not bragging,I am completely and utterly amaze...

tooaware · tooaware

I am expecting a visit from my brother who I have seen only three times in the last 27 years. We were raised in an alcoholic home. In all these years we have lived in the same state. His wife died in Nov. He is coming to see me. I went to her memorial, but it was really awkward. We talked but I am trying not to frea...

neshema2 · neshema2

I read Betty's "today's alanon reading" and needed to see this...saw it this morning but had to go to work and also i wanted to think and meditate on this and be honest with me..with my HP I just can't accept me wholly yet....I did something real stupid last night and i went "off on me&...

hotrod · hotrod

ODAT Reading for today Jan 20 is an extremely powerful page. I had to read and reread it several times before I could accept the principles that were offered. The entire meditation is about patience, and not reacting. It points out the thought that I cannot hurt others without hurting myself. If I s...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Can't go into it but I survived a bad time w/ my sober Ah.

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	To all our members on the East Coast (Preview) Many prayers for all of you and for your families and neighbors, too! As the blizzard makes itself known, I hope you all stay warm and safe, have plenty of food and can stay connected to us, too. -- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 26th of January 2015 05:04:25 PM	grateful2be	30	653	Jan 27, 2015 by grateful2be
	One thing I don't understand about boundaries. (Preview) I understand about boundaries in general, but in some situation, I don't get how that general principle is applied. If someone was breaking into a neighbor's house, and loading all their stuff into their van, I would call the cops. I would not say "None of my business - no one is being abused.&q...	Screaming Barbie	18	985	Jan 26, 2015 by grateful2be
	My Story - First Post (Preview) I'm sure you must get a few of these every day...... here's mine. I've been with my wife/partner for 10 years. I came to the relationship 'innocent' of the dangers of Alchohol, in the early days we'd meet, we'd both drink, pretty much like everyone else. Alarm bells started ringing about a year in when a...	NobleStone	15	927	Jan 26, 2015 by Breakingfree
	first ODAT summary for Jan 26 (Preview) This is my first summary for the ODAT. Since I have been attending meetings for over 29 years I thought I might try tbis. It says that family members sometimes come to Al anon out of desperation. They think they are going to get the alcoholic sober. In reality the purpose of coming is to gain serenity &am...	Hoot Nanny	8	691	Jan 26, 2015 by aquamom23
	Huntsville's Finest (Preview) So... here in the nice city of Huntsville, wife came home TRASHED. A nasty fight broke out. She attacked me. Cops were called... twice in one night. 5 kids. Was pregnant with twins but cancer recently took them from her. Huge alcoholic wife. 2 dui's. Whatever. Cops didn't believe anything about...	AWSmith	21	829	Jan 26, 2015 by Breakingfree
	A spiritual awakening re: my relationship w/my daughter (Preview) daughter #2 is bleeding b/c she has been working too much..... I called her yesterday to just get udated on family news and she was delighted to hear from me..."mommie, I love and miss you" I told her that i missed her too, but was gonna protect me from her behaviours, but not ever stop loving...	neshema2	20	1125	Jan 26, 2015 by PP
	Oooh, more chances to practice not reacting...goody!!! (Preview) Whew. You might remember my house-mate lady person that I stayed with for 9 weeks was having a pretty up and down time with her son etc and unfortunately a lot of her unhappiness ended up being directed towards myself and my daughter. In the end it became quite nasty and, knowing that I had kept my side of t...	missmeliss	11	665	Jan 26, 2015 by neshema2
	Daily reading (Preview) Hi MIP FamilyI have been posting a summary of the daily reading to the Board for the past few days . I believe it is helpful to start he day with an alanon thought. If anyone else is up early and would like to post the summary please do so. Please note , we are unable to post or copy the entire page fr...	hotrod	10	933	Jan 26, 2015 by hotrod
	Newbie (Preview) Hi all. Another newbie. In this case, an AW. This is a day, I just want to holler. That's all I have for now. Maybe more later.	Rumblefish	10	662	Jan 26, 2015 by Breakingfree
	if nothing changes nothing changes (Preview) I am changing but my Ah is not. I really believe this today. He is stuck in a rut. I am enjoying my friends & he thinks that they won't be there if I really need them. He has no clue about real friendships. Even his dad said to him that you only have one true friend & the rest are acquaintances.	Hoot Nanny	3	651	Jan 26, 2015 by Breakingfree
	Friends who use drugs and alcohol; to say something or not? (Preview) I have 4 friends who are drunk and stoned; I have been sober 31 years and 25 years in Alanon; they don't want help or want to stop; It looks like I have to drop these friendships because I just can't tolerate drunk people any more.	onestein	2	548	Jan 26, 2015 by neshema2
	To say hello or not to say hello (Preview) I have not spoken to the guy I was dating since he sent me a long apology over a week ago. (By the way, the apology was REALLY good although as I've stated before, he is really good at apologizing.) I told him I felt better that he had apologized and agreed with him that now is not the time for us to build a r...	Bostonpugwoman	10	2760	Jan 26, 2015 by neshema2
	Today's C2C - 1-26 - Spiritual Awakening (Preview) Todays Courage to Change reading is about the 12th step, especially the phrase that says Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps. As I read this page, I thought thats a fine kettle of fish! Ive volunteered to do this reading, and I havent yet done the 12th step! Then I realized that...	KennyFenderjazz	4	646	Jan 26, 2015 by karma13
	Good morning (Preview) Just want to say good morning to all hope you stay safe keep warm and get everything you Need I'm so grateful to be alive today and happy and life is what you make of it .if you don't like it change it you have that option to do so just drop it off give it to god . Live for yourself today because you count	Wisdom67	4	389	Jan 26, 2015 by hotrod
	Good Sunday morning (Preview) Just checking in to say hello . Still looking for work still keeping my spirits up . Glad today is a new day I'm grateful for what God has given me , I did makes some minor changes, I did get rid of ppl who were not good for me to.be around there true color final peeked threw and my head is clear now , I able to see t...	Wisdom67	5	381	Jan 26, 2015 by el-cee
	Do you worry that you'll stop caring? (Preview) This is my first post. I've been trying to figure out why I am struggling with removing myself from the situations my husband's drinking creates. Why I feel the need to constantly text or call to make sure he's okay and beg him not to drive. Or why I beg him constantly to stop or point out how this is hu...	mlang	13	946	Jan 26, 2015 by Jerry F
	Responses to this complaint? (Preview) My AH is obsessed with the fact we haven't been intimate for a long time. This week, he has started saying "it's been 100 days" and he is saying it over and over... linking it to other things... like maybe he would do more errands if he had sex more often. Or whatever. About 100 days ago, he cros...	oceanpine	18	909	Jan 25, 2015 by maryjane
	I don't have time for this.... (Preview) I have my advanced skills final tomorrow morning and wanted to practice at the college lab today, but woke up nauseous and very dizzy along with light headed. I went to the urgent care and the Dr. thinks I have an inner ear infection, so he put me on an antibiotic and something for the dizzy spells. I reall...	Breakingfree	21	1009	Jan 25, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	a part of a joke (Preview) The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup! That is the punch line. Can't remember the rest of the joke.	Hoot Nanny	5	383	Jan 25, 2015 by grateful2be
	Not even drinking (Preview) Hello - I'm new to this group and not even sure this is where I'm meant to be. My partner doesn't drink. He hasn't drunk for 2 years. He stopped himself because he knew he couldn't handle it and hasn't attended more than a couple of AA meetings. He says he doesn't need them. However, he has pretty severe...	gillygilly	9	680	Jan 25, 2015 by Jerry F
	I am so done with crap!!!! (Preview) I try to be a good person and I want to be treated with respect.I have been having some problems with my landlord, she doesn't want to fix things.I had a leak in my hot water tank which resulted in a bad mold problem in and around a cabinet,it could also be behind the cabinet or under the floor,she told me t...	mjferg	15	1360	Jan 25, 2015 by grateful2be
	Off "center" ! (Preview) As posted today... I have a right to want what I want and feel the way I feel. I do not have to act on those feelings but I do not have to hide them from myself as they are part of me. I'm feeling a good bit "slippery" lately - meaning I'm feeling self pity, it maybe my biggest flaw-or rather greates...	glad	4	616	Jan 25, 2015 by milkwood
	involuntary committal of a sibling (Preview) I'm struggling with whether to commit my brother. He is 51 and has been in residential treatment twice over the past 5 years. He lives alone, is unemployed, his house is out of control and is declining steadily. He falls a a lot and is bruised all over his body. He also has a history of seizures relate...	sadsister1979	4	629	Jan 25, 2015 by hotrod
	C2C ODAT thoughts for 1-25 (Preview) Thought provoking readings today in both the C2C and ODAT Courage to Change speaks about keeping the focus on others and not paying attention to our own needs and wants. It points out that we neglected ourselves because we did not think we were worthy and did want others to see us as we were. I can id...	hotrod	6	500	Jan 25, 2015 by Jerry F
	I am feeling lonely (Preview) This morning I am feeling lonely. No one is up. Slept bad because my thoughts were racing. Now I have to face another day. I think I am going to try to organize some stuff & declutter my mind. Good day is yet to come if I let it.	Hoot Nanny	7	602	Jan 25, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	UGH! More frustration (Preview) Without going into a long story, I just want to vent over the fact that now my AH claims he wants to buy a house. 3 days ago he wanted to stay here and buy me out. I found a rental, they are willing to work with my unemployed self, and I was ready to sign the lease today and now AH throws out the, "I've foun...	andromeda	28	819	Jan 25, 2015 by grateful2be
	How do you get out of a relationship with a dry drunk (Preview) I need some advice on how to break away from a dry drunk does it have to be really bad or can I gradually stop it.	Helpangel	8	683	Jan 25, 2015 by neshema2
	feeling some anxiety (Preview) I received a text from my daughter-in-law last night,my son left her and is asking for a divorce.They have 2 kids.She is hurting so bad,I really feel for her.I love them both and I told her I will be here for both of them.There aren't any bad feelings between us and I know I will be able to see my grandchil...	mjferg	3	404	Jan 25, 2015 by likemyheart
	From immoble to banana splits (Preview) on December 8th when I drug myself to the clinic hardly able to walk...needed help in the clinic to get around and to get up on the table, etc., for my exam, and finally got that shot in the muscle to put me out of my pain, the doctor while examining me said that that was one of the worst lower back muscle seizu...	neshema2	9	724	Jan 25, 2015 by el-cee
	Overview of C2C and ODAT Reading 1-24 (Preview) C2C January 24 is a powerful page that reflects on the topic of Feelings. It stresses the importance of really feeling our feelings and not pretending. It suggests that we learn how to be honest with ourselves and stop trying to fit into someone else mold. It asos points out that Al-Anon doe...	hotrod	6	736	Jan 25, 2015 by hotrod
	AH sober 50 days but sleep all the time and then complains the rest (Preview) hi all! I need some advice on how to detach from my ah who is 50 days sober but is hard to deal with. He works where I work yet goes in late all time complaining he can't sleep and then whines a lot about how he hates going to meetings all the time. If I don't say anything he gets mad if I do he gets mad. This recover...	Helpangel	17	1209	Jan 24, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	My Reality is Skewed (Preview) A posting from Andromeda reminded me of something. I played bass in a band until a couple of years ago where our keyboard player wrote a lot of originals. One of my favorites was a song called "My Reality is Skewed", it is about how our realities are skewed because we are spiritual beings in a...	KennyFenderjazz	5	814	Jan 24, 2015 by neshema2
	Walking in the truth takes a while to learn but so worth it! (Preview) I remember being all obsessed with the alcoholic and going on and on about how he was doing and someone saying to me, ok but how are YOU doing? ...That really sat be back a bit.. like a "cow looking at a new gate" is what we might say here in Texas. What did that mean "How was I doing" I'...	glad	8	730	Jan 24, 2015 by tiredtonite
	What am I grateful for TODAY???? (Preview) Grateful challenge for Saturday.....I am grateful for the following: The lessons I learned about perseverance and keeping up the work and giving outcome over to HP That I came clean with my High School classmates about my being bullied and shamed b/c I had a terrible family and now they are reaching o...	neshema2	12	831	Jan 24, 2015 by neshema2
	Feeling Frustrated and Being Negative ALL OF THE TIME! (Preview) So as you may know, my AH (who is partial denial) stopped drinking for 30 days on his own to prove to me that he "doesn't have a problem." You and I know that this won't work. What I find is that even though he is currently sober and a dry drunk, I keep treating him like he is still drinking. I feel li...	flagbabe83	7	722	Jan 24, 2015 by Jaclyn
	Donations for site funding and Board Moderator Request (Preview) This time of year is when everything comes due on the web sites annual expenses, so if you have the ability please consider making a 5-10 dollar donation to help offset the cost of this site. It is important that the site remains self supporting through its member contributions, and the burden of expe...	John	14	897	Jan 24, 2015 by Luiza
	Here we go again, just trying to hang on to my sanity (Preview) It has been a very trying week. As I expected daughter lost job ( the 3rd ) in two months for I guess not showing up the next day I don't really know. I have been nutso worrying about her. Trying very hard to read my books and messages here and praying furiously to my hp to help me and her and attend online me...	serenity47	9	526	Jan 24, 2015 by el-cee
	a work in progess (Preview) It is bad enough that I am bone tired.I am still rechecking my every move. I think I ccan handle this one day at a time. It has been years since he left me on a total episode. For those who don't knowh has bp gambling addict & alcoholic. He has been sober years away from gambling & drinking & quit...	Hoot Nanny	0	317	Jan 24, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	New Wife - Boundaries (Preview) I already know what I'm going to do .. lol .. I guess I just need to read it and think for a min about it. My children are on her insurance now, I don't care I'm just glad they finally have insurance. Honestly it costs her nothing more so it's all good. XAH has insurance however not under her policy. So he h...	SerenityRUS	4	566	Jan 24, 2015 by grateful2be
	stranded but not really: staying home (Preview) I am concerned because we have to get an alternator for our car & we have to spend more time together. I won't project but I hope we get along after having all these episodes. I will call a friend in the program if I need to & pray. I am just grateful for yesterday because we didn't argue & have a s...	Hoot Nanny	2	464	Jan 24, 2015 by grateful2be
	How to find a sponsor (Preview) Ive found lots of encouragement and hope in the posts on this board but am now serious about taking things to the next level. I cant seem to follow the step board and think I would probably work my program best with some help. I go to meetings once a week because thats all my schedule will allow. Its always a...	Hopefull15	5	866	Jan 24, 2015 by Hopefull15
	Learning to have a life (Preview) Something Alanon has taught me is how to have a life as I really did not. I was teased at last nights meeting that I hadn't been coming to due to scheduling conflicts that I finally showed up .. lol. Well, part of the wonderful part of Alanon is learning to live the life I have vs just talking about it. My k...	SerenityRUS	0	588	Jan 24, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Happy Birthday, Aquamom (Preview)	grateful2be	11	483	Jan 24, 2015 by Fairlee
	Happy Birthday, David (Preview) It is January 24th in New Zealand. Time to wish you a Happy Birthday, David!	grateful2be	13	697	Jan 24, 2015 by Fairlee
	Loneliness and HP's meeting the need (Preview) Being retired with no responsibilities has been a new experience for me. It has been a delightfully new experience with many reasons for gratitude every day for me. During the winter season, it has also brought some real challenges. One of them being loneliness as I have been snowed in or iced in or...	grateful2be	28	1132	Jan 24, 2015 by PP
	Newbie needs advice (Preview) Hello all my boyfriend finally came clean to me last Monday and told me he was an alcoholic..he basically disappeared the weekend prior and went on a drinking bing, I felt lost... I cried and couldn't understand what I did wrong... Well when he finally told me, it all seemed to make sense....I wish I co...	Abg321	18	949	Jan 24, 2015 by grateful2be
	Summertime, and the livin is easy... (Preview) What a day. I had so much fun! And also I was aware of the fact that I was having fun and the huge contrast to myself even 12 months ago and I was oh so grateful for it. So I suppose i was kinda introspective while I was outwardly enjoying my day for all it was worth. Daughter's friends and their mother did not sh...	missmeliss	3	741	Jan 24, 2015 by hotrod
	ESH and Guidance Needed; Feeling Stuck In Recovery (Preview) I haven't visited the board for a couple months. I'm feeling like I have no direction. Reading on the forum tonight I came across a couple of posts that I'd like to quote here and comment on because they touch on what I'm dealing with at this point. Betty wrote, in reference to working Step One: "...	Spur	10	776	Jan 24, 2015 by PP
	ODAT and C2C 1-23 (Preview) ODAT for today emphasizes that learning how to use the Al-Anon program, in every part of our life is not a simple matter. The reading point out that walking the walk, in every part of our life, requires more than going to a meeting now and then. . It compares learning the alanon program to deciding t...	hotrod	11	615	Jan 23, 2015 by Spur
	No changes or really half measures (Preview) Hey everyone! TGIF.....so as you know I had my 50th b-day on Monday. My AH who has been sober 9 months and who has never given me a card, present, bday anything for the last 7 years decided he would take me to dinner. Good! Nope bad, he came in late from work because he decided to stay around with the guys and d...	Flower49	24	951	Jan 23, 2015 by grateful2be
	A pitbull as a service dog??!! I cry BS!! Sort of off topic? I need feedback (Preview) My lease is up next month on my apartment. The complex has been pretty good...one noisy neighbor who didn't last too long...but now they've allowed a family with a Pitbull to move in! I am so upset. I know people here who might have pitbulls will defend them...but facts don't lie. I don't trust them. I as...	Newlife girl	22	850	Jan 23, 2015 by Newlife girl
	Up, down, round and round... (Preview) Things are all over the place. I'm so happy to be moving in to a new place, stressed about the move. Pleased my daughter is getting everything she needs to start high school, stressed that so much has been paid for by my mother. I discussed this with her today, as she as insisting everything had to be paid u...	missmeliss	9	794	Jan 23, 2015 by hotrod
	everyone has a story & this is mine as of today (Preview) The last couple of days my Ah have been arguing more than usual. I dealt w/ his abuse by yelling because at the time I thought that was the only way he would really hear me.So, I did the next right thing & called program friends, texted & called my sponsor. One example of something he said was that h...	Hoot Nanny	3	338	Jan 23, 2015 by grateful2be
	Change scares me...a new job??? (Preview) I've been working in the NICU for almost 25 years. My husband got fired from the same unit last March. I still try to cope with my feelings over the issue of him being fired. I still see the manager who "helped" in his firing. I have mixed feelings about it. I was reading online about nurse burno...	Newlife girl	3	601	Jan 23, 2015 by hotrod
	Feeling Love (Preview) My AH and I have discussed this over the years. There are days we can look at each other and think "what was I thinking?" and then there are days we can look and think "wow, he/she really looks good". When I was angry and feeling like there was 'nothing' there, I would stop and remind...	kismetstrand	4	557	Jan 23, 2015 by hotrod
	lies i have believed (Preview) I didn't think I could do much of anything, but I am coming to realize a lot of things about myself and that is I really don't know too much about my true self,if that makes any sense.I am in school and making straight A's in all classes,Don't get me wrong,I am not bragging,I am completely and utterly amaze...	mjferg	4	504	Jan 23, 2015 by grateful2be
	Estranged Family (Preview) I am expecting a visit from my brother who I have seen only three times in the last 27 years. We were raised in an alcoholic home. In all these years we have lived in the same state. His wife died in Nov. He is coming to see me. I went to her memorial, but it was really awkward. We talked but I am trying not to frea...	tooaware	1	645	Jan 23, 2015 by grateful2be
	Sometimes I just feel like throwing in the towel ( 1 2 ) (Preview) I read Betty's "today's alanon reading" and needed to see this...saw it this morning but had to go to work and also i wanted to think and meditate on this and be honest with me..with my HP I just can't accept me wholly yet....I did something real stupid last night and i went "off on me&...	neshema2	42	1406	Jan 23, 2015 by PP
	ODAT Reading 1- 20 (Preview) ODAT Reading for today Jan 20 is an extremely powerful page. I had to read and reread it several times before I could accept the principles that were offered. The entire meditation is about patience, and not reacting. It points out the thought that I cannot hurt others without hurting myself. If I s...	hotrod	7	1070	Jan 23, 2015 by karma13
	I will survive (Preview) Can't go into it but I survived a bad time w/ my sober Ah.	Hoot Nanny	5	432	Jan 23, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.