Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in One Day at a Time in Al-Anon explains that comparing myself, my lot in life, with others leads to self-pity or resentment. Relying on others to applaud or admire me makes me dependent on others for my own contentment. Real contentment comes from looking at myself and seeing that my...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's reading is about the importance of anonymity. It speaks of leaving behind labels and everything that comes with them. When I first came to al-anon, I wanted people to hear me and know who I was. I didn't really understand the concept of anonymity, because I was so anxious for people to hear me. I...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author suggests that letting go of self-condemnation could help us to love ourselves more. It IS important to identify and recognize flaws, but focusing on the too much can be detrimental to progress. Every tiny step moves us closer to wholeness, health, and serenity. Takin...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Many come to Alanon with a desperate desire to help their qualifier, the alcoholic. Upon hearing Alnon's suggestion to keep the focus on ourselves, some conclude, prematurely, that such an approach can only be heartless.One such member waited long enough to consider another possibility: the nat...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer describes murderous weapons towards the alcoholic as: indignation in a strident voice, irresponsible accusations, nagging, tears, hysteria, self-righteousness, etc. These weapons are a killer for the alcoholic to look for a better life, they kill love and respect, they cause unb...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the importance of humility in our growth. The writer describes having trouble early in the program with understanding how to develop humility. The writer decided to put the focus on being teachable- and what could be changed within in order to becom...

Lyne · Lyne

My A has decided to blame me for her drinking. I know Im not to blame for her alcohol use. Im to blame for 5 yrs of living half-time near my son, which causes her pain. I have apologized several times for causing her pain. However, there are at least 35 years that I either did not know her and did not live...

JerryF · JerryF

I haven't checked in with the board lately David and have cause to do so now as I have heard what is happening regarding sub-surface volcanos in your area. They haven't mentioned anything that I have read about your neighborhood and I am beyond curious for the present. If you get and can read this ple...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

Just finished chairing an alanon meeting, on zoom. I mentioned this in one of my shares that when I originally started attending that meeting, I felt like an AA member going to an alanon meeting, but over the past year or so they have made me feel very welcome. One member gave me a little push and I started...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at setting limits -- boundaries -- around unacceptable behavior. The author sometimes fears that if they set a limit with someone, they will be abandoned. Sometimes they set rigid boundaries in hopes of eliminating the problem forever. Their most su...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Greetings all. We have an open day for which there is no daily reading/share - Thursday(s). If one or two are willing to do this (split this), feel free to either respond here or send me a PM. Happy Thursday!

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading the author reflects on how a bee hive can teach the lesson of detachment - when a colony of bees is at work, as long as one keeps a safe distance and doesn't poke one's nose into the hive, we will be fine. The author reflects that it is their choice, when they sense that a situat...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's read relates a cautionary tale of a member who held the real and perceived woes of the day in countenance and in any conversation chanced upon. Every opportunity was taken to recount and relive the bad things that seemed to happen and the misdeeds of the alcoholic.Predictably, her encounter...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer describes what happens when we focus on worry and fear: we see terrifying pictures, hear paranoid voices, and have self-criticism. The more attention we give this static,we lose our foothold in reality, and nothing useful gets accomplished. We can break this cycle of worry and fear by...

Alanonpal · Alanonpal

Hi, my name is Frank I am looking for an online chat to help me. I am new to al-anon but need help starting out. I went to #al-anonchat on irc.chat4all.org . I was greeted by a few ppl there but they told me they could not be of help and i should find an online chat meeting. a person named Tahoe asked a lot of qu...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our reactions to others and about understanding that we are responsible for our own happiness. The writer describes suffering in response to his/her partners alcoholic behavior. When the writer contacts his/her sponsor, the writer is told that a r...

WebHelper · WebHelper

Greetings MIP family. The chatroom feature of our board has been facing repeated problems of late. It would be appreciated if members could check out the link here to help us reconcile those problems and assess the function in general. Thank you!

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at Al-Anon's beloved three C's about our powerlessness over alcoholism -- I didn't Cause It, I can't Control it, and I can't Cure it. To the author of this reading, embracing this slogan relieves them of the guilty feeling that they could have done mor...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

On Christmas Day, I chaired a zoom meeting in my district. Until recently, I haven't chaired any al-anon meetings but one day I put on my big boy pants and tried it. Wasn't too bad. I do it regularly and now I'm beginning to feel more a part of that group. It's not my home group. My home group has not held meet...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author shares about the meaning of "compassion." When the author first arrived at Al-Anon, they thought compassion meant making excuses or covering for the alcoholic. Through Al-Anon, the author learned that making excuses and covering for others is "enabling" -...

MaryFL · MaryFL

Hello, new to Alanon and this forum. Boundaries are something I am still learning and working on. I have a question though, if I set a boundary, say "I will stay at my parent's house if I feel unsafe" or "I will ask you to leave the relationship and house if you are not in active recovery, working steps an...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's writer recalls feelings of loneliness and desperation at time of Alanon discovery, of wanting the serenity that members there seemed to enjoy.The opportunity was not lost as the newcomer absorbed what had worked for others: Attending/sharing at meetings, work the Steps (in order, one at...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer of Mondays reading explores how to make positive changes: -ask, am I moving in a positive direction? -am I going to meetings and practicing the principles?-am I breaking out of unhealthy and unsatisfying patterns of the past? -can I set goals and take small risks on a daily basis? -can I ta...

DM2021 · DM2021

Sending my best wishes to the MIP Family for a very prosperous and enlightening 2022!!

Lyne · Lyne

Whats funny, but perhaps its more ironic, is that I can go for months in a mental state of letting go, live and let live, think, how important is it, etc. etc. etc. Since Christmas Eve, when my As drinking was apparent and in my face, I have not been able to let it go. So the question Im asking myself, after...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: And Happy New Year! Todays reading is about the power of the serenity prayer. The writer describes this as the first tool used in recovery. Not being able to alter the past, having the power to change our attitudes and resentments and having hope about the potential for our ow...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Funny how things come together. I posted a little while back about how I am writing a book about living through domestic violence and how I wasn't sure if I could or couldn't mention that al-anon was a HUGE part of my way out. That prompted some discussions and thinking about privacy and anonymity that I...

Freetime · Freetime

The December 31 reading in Hope for Today reflects on the consistently repeated phrases heard in the Suggested Welcome and Closing at Al-Anon meetings.No situation is really hopeless, and we can find contentment and even happiness whether the alcoholic is still drinking or notWe can put our prob...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that there are times when everything the alcoholic in their life does irritates them. It seems that the alcoholic even pours the breakfast cereal wrong! The author uses this as an opportunity to reflect on what is going on internally. Is there a revie...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer ponders the issue of facing different opinions, and what to do at that point: take a stance that one is right and one is wrong, defend oneself, take the disagreement personally, or be grateful that there are numerous ways of looking at life. The writer goes on to say if we can practice grati...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's reading encourages exploration of our intentions, particularly the gaps between intended and actual outcomes.For a variety of reasons, it is possible that our intention in anything from offering kind encouragement, increasing productivity, offering kind assistance, to creating an...

JamesCT · JamesCT

I got a report this morning that the person who took over the old chatroom is still bothering people. If this person is in the new chatroom, please send a message to me. In the new chat room I have the power to ban this person if we're in the chat at the same time. If you're still going to the old chatroom, stop...

Iamhere · Iamhere

https://alanon.activeboard.com/t68108906/service-positions-moderation-for-chatm...

nursedebbi · nursedebbi

Im wondering if this earth rocker is the DAViD you had problems with and banned in here on the board. Just prior to earthrocker showing up in the chatroom. David was in the chatroom. Someone asked him about being banned on here and he wouldnt say why. He banned Tahoe a 20 year alanon member on MIP...

Lyne · Lyne

Last week I posted about not asking the question I knew the answer to. Well last night at our Xmas dinner with family, my A made about 5 trips to the car. We all knew she was drinking. And I knew she was drinking last week but didnt ask. Well I didnt ask this morning, but said I wanted to tell her something...

Tahoe1 · Tahoe1

After decades of using MIP's #alanon chatroom I'm sad to say that it has had a 'hostile takeover' by a narcissistic jerk and is no longer controlled by MIP. The jerk using the nickname 'earthrocker' banned me from the chatroom, and I have no access to it. He is exactly what an alanon chatroom doesn't n...

Bettertomorrow · Bettertomorrow

In Al-Anon we learn to Think before reacting to angry outbursts and drunken accusations. We also learn the value of silence. But silence can be more cutting that cruel words when it is used to punish. Deliberately ignoring someones attempts to communicate can be no better than a battle of words. Ra...

nursedebbi · nursedebbi

Earthrocker has taken control of the MIP chatroom for alanon group. He even bestowed upon himself moderator control unless someone from MIP gave it to him?? He banned a very long time member of MIP Tahoe. Tahoe used to be moderator in there for along time. A while back his moderator status was r...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on finding love we are seeking- within ourselves. The writer describes going from an alcoholic home hoping to feel love and then transferring that expectation of love to an alcoholic boyfriend. The writer lived for his love and kept wanting and exp...

lookingup · lookingup

hello Alanon Family, hope all is well, im been gone from here a long time,needing get back. im glad to be posting now, all has been ok in my world ,non perfect but ok. still single and loving it compared to where i was 8 yrs ago before my alanon recovery. hope to chat to others here,.......hugs looking up

lookingup · lookingup

this person named earthrocker has taken over mip meeting room ,keeps running ppl off, he is very strange and scary. he comes in room n stayes never leaves and talks scary, he also has OP ,dunno how he managed getting that. he has told me that he is graduating alanoners out,and that god is his qualifier,,...

JerryF · JerryF

Yeppers I again say it in my native language ...Hawaiian. Merry Christmas to my loving, caring, recovering family. I am not home in the islands at the moment but under the cold rain in Clovis California. It is what it is whether I am fond of it or not. This is my wife territory and I am riding along. ...

Lyne · Lyne

I heard that phrase on the message board maybe 8 yrs agoit sticks in my head. Im quite sure my A came home drunk last night although she insists she no longer drinks. She was tearful on and off, perseverating, talking non-stop, and after 45 min. I said I had to get ready for bed. Did I want to confront her...

WendyP · WendyP

Hi, it's WendyP, I decided to share some Love and Laughter with all of you. As I share my feelings, pain and fears, I thought why not share my Love and Laughter as well. Yesterday, one of my Great Grand Son's came over to spend the day with me, he is 6 going on 7. I have a number of Grand's and Great's, and all o...

Freetime · Freetime

The author of today's page in Hope for Today used Step Two when visiting with family on a holiday. When the family's behavior made them uncomfortable, our author chose to go to another room and pray/meditate for serenity and guidance to keep focused on themselves and the present moment. This allow...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that at first, we might focus on applying Al-Anon principles to only one family situation, but there are many ways we can keep the program with us wherever we go. Some members chose to carry literature in a lunch box, pocket, or purse so we can touch bas...

flower19 · flower19

In an Alanon Group is this acceptable? Calling you out in front of everyone in a public restaurant and other group members. Than making you apologize just because you left abruptly because you didnt want to argue or fight because you were above all humilated. They say she isnt talking to us like tha...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page considers the work of steps 8 & 9 as we list those we have harmed...and reminds not to forget to include ourselves. We cannot, nor should not focus our efforts on saving or changing others. In Alanon we learn to turn our focus and efforts toward restoring the damage within ourselves. T...

Iamhere · Iamhere

MIP family - I am 'home' - my house, my couch, my food and soon - my bed with my pillow and blanket. I am a very tired gal who's body clock is a bit screwed up because of different time zones, yet am playing catch up 'here'. I left my home 2 weeks ago today and drove for 18 hours (stopped, for the first time @ a h...

Fedora · Fedora

Hello! I came by to wish everyone a peaceful holiday season. This is my first holiday season as a Former spouse of an alcoholic and I am feeling the great pleasure and luxury of a life that is not driven by the need to fix/control/accommodate the Q in my life. As I type this, I'm getting ready for bed after...

NewGirl1717 · NewGirl1717

Hi I'm new to all this. I found this forum through Google. I have not been to a meeting yet. I'm hoping to go in the next couple of weeks. I am living with my alcoholic boyfriend of 5 years. The first year was good but it has been downward spiraling since. He drinks from the moment he wakes up to the moment he go...

Lyne · Lyne

This reading discusses the purpose of alanon, (to help families and friends of alcoholics), but how is this actually done? We are reminded to practice the 12 Steps, to learn to love ourselves, attend to our own spiritual needs, and then it is possible for others to see something special in us. Next is...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

My Ex and I have limited contact. Text only. The first year of separation and then as the divorce went through, I tried to be the best "Ex spouse" I could be. Many times doing things that ended up hurting me - b/c I didn't want my kid's dad to relapse and I wanted my kid to learn that these things could be amica...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about how al-anon is a focus on ourselves, not the alcoholic(s) in our lives or anyone else. For many of us, it takes a while to understand that we have the ability to redirect the focus and energy on other people on ourselves instead. Like the writer, I rememb...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change discusses the suggestion that we pray for those we have resented. The author found this difficult at first, but eventually learned to stop praying that other people would change, and instead pray that the other person be given the serenity, love, and joy that w...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on Step 3 - turning my life over to the care of a Higher Power. At first, the author was confused - how could they do this? The author's need for control made the thought of turning their life over to the care of a Higher Power very scary. The author wasn'...

Newlifegirl67 · Newlifegirl67

Hi. it feels good to be back. it.s been many years since I was here. I feel very vulnerable spilling my guts here because i feel new. But i desperately need support and encouragement if possible. I left my alcoholic husband in 2015. We have been divorced since 2016. I am very angry at myself for being ign...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page considers types of loss, including the contributor's paralyzing loss of someone close. Lessons learned: Our powerlessness does not make exceptions for us, nor does the power of restoration promised us through a power greater than ourselves...we can overcome anything.Reminder: N...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday 12/13, describes riding a bicycle as helping one feel alive and in balance. The ride on a bike can bring vitality into each day, the same way applying live and let live can. The author tries to embrace whatever life brings, sorrow and joy. If you live your own life to the fullest...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change describes how doing a Fourth Step inventory helped someone discover who they truly are, and to decide what behaviors they want to keep or to change. Previously, they did not know their own wants and needs, and could not distinguish between acceptable and unac...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	January 21 - ODAT - Comparison (Preview) Today's reading in One Day at a Time in Al-Anon explains that comparing myself, my lot in life, with others leads to self-pity or resentment. Relying on others to applaud or admire me makes me dependent on others for my own contentment. Real contentment comes from looking at myself and seeing that my...	Freetime	3	1121	Jan 22, 2022 by Lyne
	c2c 20/1 (Preview) Today's reading is about the importance of anonymity. It speaks of leaving behind labels and everything that comes with them. When I first came to al-anon, I wanted people to hear me and know who I was. I didn't really understand the concept of anonymity, because I was so anxious for people to hear me. I...	Youknowme	5	2869	Jan 21, 2022 by serenity47
	Courage to Change January 19 (Preview) In today's reading, the author suggests that letting go of self-condemnation could help us to love ourselves more. It IS important to identify and recognize flaws, but focusing on the too much can be detrimental to progress. Every tiny step moves us closer to wholeness, health, and serenity. Takin...	Skorpi	3	2282	Jan 20, 2022 by Iamhere
	1/18/22 C2C Best Way to Help Qualifier: Focus on Self? (Preview) Many come to Alanon with a desperate desire to help their qualifier, the alcoholic. Upon hearing Alnon's suggestion to keep the focus on ourselves, some conclude, prematurely, that such an approach can only be heartless.One such member waited long enough to consider another possibility: the nat...	Enigmatic	5	647	Jan 18, 2022 by Iamhere
	ODAT in alanon, Monday 1/17, murderous weapons (Preview) The writer describes murderous weapons towards the alcoholic as: indignation in a strident voice, irresponsible accusations, nagging, tears, hysteria, self-righteousness, etc. These weapons are a killer for the alcoholic to look for a better life, they kill love and respect, they cause unb...	Lyne	2	3517	Jan 17, 2022 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Jan 16 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the importance of humility in our growth. The writer describes having trouble early in the program with understanding how to develop humility. The writer decided to put the focus on being teachable- and what could be changed within in order to becom...	yanksfan51	6	667	Jan 16, 2022 by Iamhere
	ESH please (Preview) My A has decided to blame me for her drinking. I know Im not to blame for her alcohol use. Im to blame for 5 yrs of living half-time near my son, which causes her pain. I have apologized several times for causing her pain. However, there are at least 35 years that I either did not know her and did not live...	Lyne	5	1836	Jan 16, 2022 by Lyne
	David G (Preview) I haven't checked in with the board lately David and have cause to do so now as I have heard what is happening regarding sub-surface volcanos in your area. They haven't mentioned anything that I have read about your neighborhood and I am beyond curious for the present. If you get and can read this ple...	JerryF	3	2423	Jan 16, 2022 by Iamhere
	Participation is the key to Harmony (Preview) Just finished chairing an alanon meeting, on zoom. I mentioned this in one of my shares that when I originally started attending that meeting, I felt like an AA member going to an alanon meeting, but over the past year or so they have made me feel very welcome. One member gave me a little push and I started...	Wolfie55	2	2403	Jan 15, 2022 by Iamhere
	January 14 - Hope for Today - Boundaries (Preview) Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at setting limits -- boundaries -- around unacceptable behavior. The author sometimes fears that if they set a limit with someone, they will be abandoned. Sometimes they set rigid boundaries in hopes of eliminating the problem forever. Their most su...	Freetime	5	1569	Jan 14, 2022 by DM2021
	Volunteer for Daily Reader/Share on Thursdays (Preview) Greetings all. We have an open day for which there is no daily reading/share - Thursday(s). If one or two are willing to do this (split this), feel free to either respond here or send me a PM. Happy Thursday!	Iamhere	6	1527	Jan 14, 2022 by DM2021
	Courage to Change January 12 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading the author reflects on how a bee hive can teach the lesson of detachment - when a colony of bees is at work, as long as one keeps a safe distance and doesn't poke one's nose into the hive, we will be fine. The author reflects that it is their choice, when they sense that a situat...	Skorpi	5	700	Jan 12, 2022 by Iamhere
	1/11/22 Say Something Often Enough... (Preview) Today's read relates a cautionary tale of a member who held the real and perceived woes of the day in countenance and in any conversation chanced upon. Every opportunity was taken to recount and relive the bad things that seemed to happen and the misdeeds of the alcoholic.Predictably, her encounter...	Enigmatic	5	752	Jan 11, 2022 by Iamhere
	C2C, Monday, 1/10, worry and fear (Preview) The writer describes what happens when we focus on worry and fear: we see terrifying pictures, hear paranoid voices, and have self-criticism. The more attention we give this static,we lose our foothold in reality, and nothing useful gets accomplished. We can break this cycle of worry and fear by...	Lyne	2	2118	Jan 10, 2022 by Iamhere
	Looking 4 online chat help (Preview) Hi, my name is Frank I am looking for an online chat to help me. I am new to al-anon but need help starting out. I went to #al-anonchat on irc.chat4all.org . I was greeted by a few ppl there but they told me they could not be of help and i should find an online chat meeting. a person named Tahoe asked a lot of qu...	Alanonpal	9	4800	Jan 9, 2022 by Tahoe1
	Hope for Today Jan 9 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our reactions to others and about understanding that we are responsible for our own happiness. The writer describes suffering in response to his/her partners alcoholic behavior. When the writer contacts his/her sponsor, the writer is told that a r...	yanksfan51	3	729	Jan 9, 2022 by PosiesandPuppies
	Member input sought on the business board. (Preview) Greetings MIP family. The chatroom feature of our board has been facing repeated problems of late. It would be appreciated if members could check out the link here to help us reconcile those problems and assess the function in general. Thank you!	WebHelper	1	2656	Jan 9, 2022 by Lyne
	January 7 - Hope for Today - The 3 C's (Preview) Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at Al-Anon's beloved three C's about our powerlessness over alcoholism -- I didn't Cause It, I can't Control it, and I can't Cure it. To the author of this reading, embracing this slogan relieves them of the guilty feeling that they could have done mor...	Freetime	4	2629	Jan 8, 2022 by Lyne
	Importance of A Group (Preview) On Christmas Day, I chaired a zoom meeting in my district. Until recently, I haven't chaired any al-anon meetings but one day I put on my big boy pants and tried it. Wasn't too bad. I do it regularly and now I'm beginning to feel more a part of that group. It's not my home group. My home group has not held meet...	Wolfie55	7	3348	Jan 6, 2022 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change January 5 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author shares about the meaning of "compassion." When the author first arrived at Al-Anon, they thought compassion meant making excuses or covering for the alcoholic. Through Al-Anon, the author learned that making excuses and covering for others is "enabling" -...	Skorpi	4	723	Jan 6, 2022 by DM2021
	Boundaries- manipulation? (Preview) Hello, new to Alanon and this forum. Boundaries are something I am still learning and working on. I have a question though, if I set a boundary, say "I will stay at my parent's house if I feel unsafe" or "I will ask you to leave the relationship and house if you are not in active recovery, working steps an...	MaryFL	6	3786	Jan 5, 2022 by Daffodils
	C2C 1/4/22 The Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with One Step... (Preview) Today's writer recalls feelings of loneliness and desperation at time of Alanon discovery, of wanting the serenity that members there seemed to enjoy.The opportunity was not lost as the newcomer absorbed what had worked for others: Attending/sharing at meetings, work the Steps (in order, one at...	Enigmatic	4	3220	Jan 4, 2022 by Daffodils
	C2C, Monday, 1/3: I can change the past if I stop repeating it in the present. (Preview) The writer of Mondays reading explores how to make positive changes: -ask, am I moving in a positive direction? -am I going to meetings and practicing the principles?-am I breaking out of unhealthy and unsatisfying patterns of the past? -can I set goals and take small risks on a daily basis? -can I ta...	Lyne	3	723	Jan 3, 2022 by Iamhere
	Happy New Year MIP Family!! (Preview) Sending my best wishes to the MIP Family for a very prosperous and enlightening 2022!!	DM2021	3	4316	Jan 2, 2022 by DM2021
	Funny, but not really (Preview) Whats funny, but perhaps its more ironic, is that I can go for months in a mental state of letting go, live and let live, think, how important is it, etc. etc. etc. Since Christmas Eve, when my As drinking was apparent and in my face, I have not been able to let it go. So the question Im asking myself, after...	Lyne	2	3429	Jan 2, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Jan 2 (Preview) Good morning everyone: And Happy New Year! Todays reading is about the power of the serenity prayer. The writer describes this as the first tool used in recovery. Not being able to alter the past, having the power to change our attitudes and resentments and having hope about the potential for our ow...	yanksfan51	2	3598	Jan 2, 2022 by DM2021
	Back to the drawing board for me. (Preview) Funny how things come together. I posted a little while back about how I am writing a book about living through domestic violence and how I wasn't sure if I could or couldn't mention that al-anon was a HUGE part of my way out. That prompted some discussions and thinking about privacy and anonymity that I...	Youknowme	12	3379	Jan 1, 2022 by Iamhere
	December 31 - Hope for Today - Consistency (Preview) The December 31 reading in Hope for Today reflects on the consistently repeated phrases heard in the Suggested Welcome and Closing at Al-Anon meetings.No situation is really hopeless, and we can find contentment and even happiness whether the alcoholic is still drinking or notWe can put our prob...	Freetime	6	3102	Jan 1, 2022 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change December 29 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that there are times when everything the alcoholic in their life does irritates them. It seems that the alcoholic even pours the breakfast cereal wrong! The author uses this as an opportunity to reflect on what is going on internally. Is there a revie...	Skorpi	7	1328	Dec 31, 2021 by DM2021
	C2C, Monday 12/27: Differing opinions? Carry your QTIP! (Preview) The writer ponders the issue of facing different opinions, and what to do at that point: take a stance that one is right and one is wrong, defend oneself, take the disagreement personally, or be grateful that there are numerous ways of looking at life. The writer goes on to say if we can practice grati...	Lyne	4	1694	Dec 28, 2021 by Iamhere
	12/28/21 ODAT What Road is Paved With Good Intentions, for 400 (Preview) Today's reading encourages exploration of our intentions, particularly the gaps between intended and actual outcomes.For a variety of reasons, it is possible that our intention in anything from offering kind encouragement, increasing productivity, offering kind assistance, to creating an...	Enigmatic	4	1003	Dec 28, 2021 by Iamhere
	The chatroom (Preview) I got a report this morning that the person who took over the old chatroom is still bothering people. If this person is in the new chatroom, please send a message to me. In the new chat room I have the power to ban this person if we're in the chat at the same time. If you're still going to the old chatroom, stop...	JamesCT	1	1453	Dec 28, 2021 by DM2021
	Service Positions - Moderation for Chat/Meeting Room - Al-Anon (Preview) https://alanon.activeboard.com/t68108906/service-positions-moderation-for-chatm...	Iamhere	0	1545	Dec 27, 2021 by Iamhere
	EARTHROCK (Preview) Im wondering if this earth rocker is the DAViD you had problems with and banned in here on the board. Just prior to earthrocker showing up in the chatroom. David was in the chatroom. Someone asked him about being banned on here and he wouldnt say why. He banned Tahoe a 20 year alanon member on MIP...	nursedebbi	4	2759	Dec 27, 2021 by DM2021
	Not silent anymore (Preview) Last week I posted about not asking the question I knew the answer to. Well last night at our Xmas dinner with family, my A made about 5 trips to the car. We all knew she was drinking. And I knew she was drinking last week but didnt ask. Well I didnt ask this morning, but said I wanted to tell her something...	Lyne	7	1399	Dec 26, 2021 by Lyne
	Not so merry... (Preview) After decades of using MIP's #alanon chatroom I'm sad to say that it has had a 'hostile takeover' by a narcissistic jerk and is no longer controlled by MIP. The jerk using the nickname 'earthrocker' banned me from the chatroom, and I have no access to it. He is exactly what an alanon chatroom doesn't n...	Tahoe1	6	2287	Dec 26, 2021 by Iamhere
	Silence C2C 25 December (Preview) In Al-Anon we learn to Think before reacting to angry outbursts and drunken accusations. We also learn the value of silence. But silence can be more cutting that cruel words when it is used to punish. Deliberately ignoring someones attempts to communicate can be no better than a battle of words. Ra...	Bettertomorrow	4	1182	Dec 26, 2021 by Daffodils
	EARTHROCKER (Preview) Earthrocker has taken control of the MIP chatroom for alanon group. He even bestowed upon himself moderator control unless someone from MIP gave it to him?? He banned a very long time member of MIP Tahoe. Tahoe used to be moderator in there for along time. A while back his moderator status was r...	nursedebbi	2	1594	Dec 26, 2021 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Dec 26 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on finding love we are seeking- within ourselves. The writer describes going from an alcoholic home hoping to feel love and then transferring that expectation of love to an alcoholic boyfriend. The writer lived for his love and kept wanting and exp...	yanksfan51	1	1349	Dec 26, 2021 by DM2021
	Merry Christmas! (Preview) hello Alanon Family, hope all is well, im been gone from here a long time,needing get back. im glad to be posting now, all has been ok in my world ,non perfect but ok. still single and loving it compared to where i was 8 yrs ago before my alanon recovery. hope to chat to others here,.......hugs looking up	lookingup	4	1663	Dec 25, 2021 by lookingup
	Who is EarthRocker (Preview) this person named earthrocker has taken over mip meeting room ,keeps running ppl off, he is very strange and scary. he comes in room n stayes never leaves and talks scary, he also has OP ,dunno how he managed getting that. he has told me that he is graduating alanoners out,and that god is his qualifier,,...	lookingup	7	1402	Dec 25, 2021 by lookingup
	Mele Kalikimaka (Preview) Yeppers I again say it in my native language ...Hawaiian. Merry Christmas to my loving, caring, recovering family. I am not home in the islands at the moment but under the cold rain in Clovis California. It is what it is whether I am fond of it or not. This is my wife territory and I am riding along. ...	JerryF	7	2685	Dec 25, 2021 by Daffodils
	If you know the answer to a question, don’t ask (Preview) I heard that phrase on the message board maybe 8 yrs agoit sticks in my head. Im quite sure my A came home drunk last night although she insists she no longer drinks. She was tearful on and off, perseverating, talking non-stop, and after 45 min. I said I had to get ready for bed. Did I want to confront her...	Lyne	5	1690	Dec 25, 2021 by Iamhere
	Love and Laughter (Preview) Hi, it's WendyP, I decided to share some Love and Laughter with all of you. As I share my feelings, pain and fears, I thought why not share my Love and Laughter as well. Yesterday, one of my Great Grand Son's came over to spend the day with me, he is 6 going on 7. I have a number of Grand's and Great's, and all o...	WendyP	4	1256	Dec 25, 2021 by Iamhere
	December 24 - Hope for Today (Preview) The author of today's page in Hope for Today used Step Two when visiting with family on a holiday. When the family's behavior made them uncomfortable, our author chose to go to another room and pray/meditate for serenity and guidance to keep focused on themselves and the present moment. This allow...	Freetime	3	1650	Dec 24, 2021 by DM2021
	Courage to Change December 22 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that at first, we might focus on applying Al-Anon principles to only one family situation, but there are many ways we can keep the program with us wherever we go. Some members chose to carry literature in a lunch box, pocket, or purse so we can touch bas...	Skorpi	3	620	Dec 23, 2021 by Lyne
	I had to leave (Preview) In an Alanon Group is this acceptable? Calling you out in front of everyone in a public restaurant and other group members. Than making you apologize just because you left abruptly because you didnt want to argue or fight because you were above all humilated. They say she isnt talking to us like tha...	flower19	3	757	Dec 22, 2021 by JerryF
	12/21/21 C2C People We Have Harmed… (Preview) Today's page considers the work of steps 8 & 9 as we list those we have harmed...and reminds not to forget to include ourselves. We cannot, nor should not focus our efforts on saving or changing others. In Alanon we learn to turn our focus and efforts toward restoring the damage within ourselves. T...	Enigmatic	2	617	Dec 21, 2021 by DM2021
	I'm Home (Preview) MIP family - I am 'home' - my house, my couch, my food and soon - my bed with my pillow and blanket. I am a very tired gal who's body clock is a bit screwed up because of different time zones, yet am playing catch up 'here'. I left my home 2 weeks ago today and drove for 18 hours (stopped, for the first time @ a h...	Iamhere	27	3331	Dec 21, 2021 by Enigmatic
	A wish for peace for everyone! (Preview) Hello! I came by to wish everyone a peaceful holiday season. This is my first holiday season as a Former spouse of an alcoholic and I am feeling the great pleasure and luxury of a life that is not driven by the need to fix/control/accommodate the Q in my life. As I type this, I'm getting ready for bed after...	Fedora	5	991	Dec 21, 2021 by Enigmatic
	New (Preview) Hi I'm new to all this. I found this forum through Google. I have not been to a meeting yet. I'm hoping to go in the next couple of weeks. I am living with my alcoholic boyfriend of 5 years. The first year was good but it has been downward spiraling since. He drinks from the moment he wakes up to the moment he go...	NewGirl1717	4	1532	Dec 21, 2021 by Enigmatic
	C2C, 12/20, How do we really help? (Preview) This reading discusses the purpose of alanon, (to help families and friends of alcoholics), but how is this actually done? We are reminded to practice the 12 Steps, to learn to love ourselves, attend to our own spiritual needs, and then it is possible for others to see something special in us. Next is...	Lyne	3	773	Dec 20, 2021 by PosiesandPuppies
	Need a little "real time" help (Preview) My Ex and I have limited contact. Text only. The first year of separation and then as the divorce went through, I tried to be the best "Ex spouse" I could be. Many times doing things that ended up hurting me - b/c I didn't want my kid's dad to relapse and I wanted my kid to learn that these things could be amica...	PosiesandPuppies	5	915	Dec 20, 2021 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today Dec 19 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about how al-anon is a focus on ourselves, not the alcoholic(s) in our lives or anyone else. For many of us, it takes a while to understand that we have the ability to redirect the focus and energy on other people on ourselves instead. Like the writer, I rememb...	yanksfan51	2	607	Dec 19, 2021 by PosiesandPuppies
	December 17 - C2C - Bless Them, Change Me (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change discusses the suggestion that we pray for those we have resented. The author found this difficult at first, but eventually learned to stop praying that other people would change, and instead pray that the other person be given the serenity, love, and joy that w...	Freetime	3	1691	Dec 18, 2021 by Lyne
	Courage to Change December 15 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on Step 3 - turning my life over to the care of a Higher Power. At first, the author was confused - how could they do this? The author's need for control made the thought of turning their life over to the care of a Higher Power very scary. The author wasn'...	Skorpi	3	2780	Dec 16, 2021 by DM2021
	I desperately need help from people here who understand... (Preview) Hi. it feels good to be back. it.s been many years since I was here. I feel very vulnerable spilling my guts here because i feel new. But i desperately need support and encouragement if possible. I left my alcoholic husband in 2015. We have been divorced since 2016. I am very angry at myself for being ign...	Newlifegirl67	8	3822	Dec 14, 2021 by Jill
	12/14/21 ODAT – Powerlessness, Restoration: No Limits… (Preview) Today's page considers types of loss, including the contributor's paralyzing loss of someone close. Lessons learned: Our powerlessness does not make exceptions for us, nor does the power of restoration promised us through a power greater than ourselves...we can overcome anything.Reminder: N...	Enigmatic	2	2584	Dec 14, 2021 by Lyne
	C2C, 12/13, Live and let live (Preview) The reading for Monday 12/13, describes riding a bicycle as helping one feel alive and in balance. The ride on a bike can bring vitality into each day, the same way applying live and let live can. The author tries to embrace whatever life brings, sorrow and joy. If you live your own life to the fullest...	Lyne	3	1914	Dec 14, 2021 by DM2021
	December 10 - C2C - Knowing Myself (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change describes how doing a Fourth Step inventory helped someone discover who they truly are, and to decide what behaviors they want to keep or to change. Previously, they did not know their own wants and needs, and could not distinguish between acceptable and unac...	Freetime	7	3023	Dec 13, 2021 by DM2021
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.