Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

hadit · hadit

As the title of this post states, this is just an idea that I had. I have not said anything to anyone about it especially my ex the a. He has stated to me that he does want to stop drinking, and he does want to work on getting back together, but is opposed to going to AA. What I was wondering was would it be a real s...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Wow! Ya know I thought I had a pretty decent handle on how to work my program. If you had asked me how I do that with an active A, I could tell you all kinds of stuff. Now I have been told that when they get into recovery, we just continue to do the same as we would if they were active. O...

ESH · ESH

I sure have been getting a LOT out of the online Al-Anon meetings lately. I am so grateful that I found this place. I get a lot of ideas from all of you on how to take care of myself. One thing that I wanted to share with you is that someone had either mentioned this, or I read it in a post, or...

Cyn · Cyn

I am struggling with this question - I really am. I am a logical person and my therapist says I am trying to rationalize something that is totally irrational. Why do addicts cheat? Why when they have good things in their life do they cheat on them? Why do they make the people wh...

captcodee · captcodee

You hear people often post here about their frustrations with the alcoholics in their lives. I am great with dealing with the alcoholic. Some times I think I have that down pat! When a struggle comes up that requires my attention and focus, I thrive...I have come to a...

Barbara · Barbara

A's friend has been without a car since at least the summer. A has been driving roundtrip about 30miles few times a day each wknd day to bring his A friend back to our house. (His friend has no car). I told A that his car wasnt going to last if he kept doing this but of course he didnt listen. Told A I was NOT goin...

Karilynn · Karilynn

Hi roomies, I know this is a day early and very early (6:30am), but with tomorrow and my work schedule this weekend, I may not get the chance to post. I want to wish each and every one of you, your family and friends a VERY HAPPY THANKSGIVING. While for the majority of us it's about the feast, the fo...

hellion · hellion

Hello everyone. I've just joined the group. I need some help. My husband is just over 30 days into recovery, the first real effort he's ever made to stop drinking and fix parts of his life that need fixing. He is doing everything from supported outpatient care, AA and other groups, to reading and le...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, Well I picked my husband up from the IOP after detox yesterday. I brought him back to his parents house. He came over this morning to help get the little ones off to school and left for the IOP from here. He is talking about Christmas decorations and presents. I told him about the job, but he says he...

browneyes · browneyes

I don't want my husband to be with us on Thanksgiving if he is high. I told him this and he said "You can't tell me not to go to my own mom's house". And I told him then I did not want to go with him. I am close with his mom and uncle who lives there too. They would be devastated if I did no...

sunny1 · sunny1

Nov 23, 05 Morning all, I have been saying the serenity prayer every morning in hopes that it will guide me during the day. I have been in a really good place lately. I have found that once I let go and let god I am able to let go of the control and realize that I have no control over anyone else but me and I am ab...

nikkilou · nikkilou

HI all, On my way to drive my daughter to school I was thinking what am I thankfull for. Well guess what. I am thankfull for all my friends here. This board saved me and my family. To often I think it and don't say it. SO here I am. THANK YOU ALL I LOVE YOU enjoy the holiday....

captcodee · captcodee

I have had a rough couple of weeks in my own head. I have been really harsh on myself, mostly with expectations. I had a friend on the board remind me that all that internal chatter can remove the direction of God (Thy will, not mine, be done). So last night I decided to phone my sponsor.&nb...

Kim · Kim

so in checking last night (again I shouldn't have) and found another girl..........."Bunny". She was nice enough to enlighten me to their relationship, and was more than graphic. She continued to call me back all night and harrass me with dirty details left on the message machi...

kissers · kissers

my last job I had a new manager come in. He seemed to be nice. He told me about his daughter dying from cancer at the age of 11. My heart went out to him. We went on a few appts and he kept telling potential clients about his daughter dying. It became obvious he was trying to get their sympathy so they would do bu...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

I am so dettached that I don't see what the point is... I don't care to be with him anymore, but I don't want to leave either. He is sick, just as I have health problems. He isn't leaving me because of it, but what is the point in living seperate lives in the same home? josey

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi roomies, I was in the chat room the other day and there was some talk of red-heads, and their hot tempers. LOL. (I resemble that remark) It was all said in fun so I just had to share this joke I got today with you all. I hope I don't offend any blondes out there. If I do please let me know and I will refrain...

sg · sg

A. called me a bit ago. He went thru his assessment and starts out patient treatment a week from tomorrow. I told him I was happy for him. Inside I am irritated, frustrated and want to just sit and cry. I'm so angry at times, so disappointed and very detached.

txmom · txmom

Good morning all of my wonderful MIP family :) As most everyone knows, I lost my husband a little over 3 weeks ago. After a period of shock and numbness I have spent about a week in the most unbelievable sadness I have ever felt. Until now, I didn't think that it was possible for a human bein...

sg · sg

My A. has seemed on top of the world since he quit cold turkey a few weeks ago. He seems anxious to get his assessment done today and start out patient rehab. I'm happy for him. Sunday I was feeling a bit down on myself trying to figure out why I can't feel the same way about him anymore..about us. Th...

nycbt · nycbt

i can't get into the chatroom and i am getting upset i have tried since 9 the morning and now it is 3:17 pm. i need help -- Edited by nycbt at 15:24, 2005-11-22 -- Edited by nycbt at 15:26, 2005-11-22

kissers · kissers

Hi All! I saw this movie Saturday night. It was a fabulous movie. I paid attention to the character of June Carter. She was such a great woman. She was Johnny Cash's(Johnny=alcoholic, drug abuser) true friend. She loved him but kept her boundaries with him. She accepted him for who he was. Dur...

nycbt · nycbt

I read over the last month of post because I like to paste them and bring them to my doctor so he can see my growth. Just in case I forgot anything it is already written in the post. I wirte everything down. I was amazing myself on the progress I made with in the month. Wow my writing shows me. The things that I h...

tea2 · tea2

All I am able to say at this point is by reading the board lately I feel like it is the story of my life. My ex the A his drinking and marijuana use at age 12, his not willing to be a dad, his enabling parents -his whole family (place a happy face on the family attitude) and the child (our son) who is left goin...

browneyes · browneyes

Hi guys I feel like my h has no clue about anything sometimes!! he just irked me to no end this am He came home yesterday from his "program" and fell asleep. Didn't wake up for dinner or to say hello to anyone. but as we are going to sleep he decides to wake up and rile the kids up and...

hopefortoday · hopefortoday

One of the things my sponsor always tells me is, "nothing is forever." Not the bad, and not the good, either. Not the situation I am in. Not me. Not my happiness. Not my anger. It helps me to remember this when I'm having a bad day - as in, "this too shall pass." It helps me to remember this when I'm ha...

nycbt · nycbt

I HAVE BEEN TRYING ALL DAY TO GET INTO THE CHATROOM SINCE 9:00 AM AND IT KEEPS SAYING IT IS CLOSED. WHAT TO DO.

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

The Magic of Gratitude and Acceptance Gratitude and acceptance are two magic tricks available to us in recovery. No matter who we are, where we are, or what we have, gratitude and acceptance work.We may eventually become so happy that we realize our present circumstances are good. Or we master o...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Foundation First "As we begin to function in society, our creative freedom helps us sort our priorities and do the basic things first."Basic Text pg. 83No sooner do we get clean than some of us begin putting other priorities ahead of our recovery. Careers, families, relationships - all these are p...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Depression All of us go through times of depression. When we were overeating, we may have felt depressed almost continually. We find that abstinence and the OA program lift us out of depression. The outward circumstances of life may not change radically, but by means of our program we experienc...

bobump · bobump

Replying to someone else got me thinking about something I am having a problem with. My A started her new job yesterday. Seemed to enjoy it. Good for her if she is enjoying it. She is getting up at 6:30 for an 8:00 am job. She gets herself ready and nothing gets in her...

Kim · Kim

Got a call from my A today that he followed up with our GP and he was sending him to the hospital for a CAT scan. I told him that I would meet him at the hospital, he said he didn't want me to leave work. I said I wouldn't Iwould finish out my day and meet him there after work. (the hospital is in between wor...

kissers · kissers

I have picked excerpts in the book that seem most important. It would be too much to type everything, so here it goes. Book: How Al-Anon Works for Families & Friends of Alcoholics Learning About Alcoholism Alcoholism is a family disease. Compulsive drinking a...

sallyb · sallyb

We had the best day yesterday - we visited my family and enjoyed each other's company all day. On the way home I thought to myself that I should mention to him that if he needed anything he should stop at the store. We live in the country, a trip to the store takes at least 30 minutes. I di...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

well my a met up with an addictions counsellor and will see him again in a week. they set up some goals and plans for what to do with pressure or the urge creeps up to drink or use again. im not getting my hopes up but i will see what happens. i will stand by my man down the road to recovery but will have to leave if...

Kim · Kim

Well, here I am 2 in the morning. Just back from the hospital. A got his appendix out.....a long night and what a fool I was!!! Taking his belongings from the hospital his phone was there and a call to "kerri" was made Sat. night. I immediately felt as if someone had kicked me in the appendix....

zoomie · zoomie

As I sit here my 15 year old is in her room alseep. She should be in school. I have tried everything to get her to go to school,but she refuses to go. The next thing is the school putting a PINS on her. She did not use this weekend thank God,but her behavior is the same. I'm sooooooooo tired of this mess. ...

kissers · kissers

Hi everyone! I have purchased almost all of the Alanon books and I was thinking I could start a discussion by typing in excerpts from one of the books. Would anyone be interested? If so, let me know and I will set aside time every evening on a weekly basis. I know not everyone has the books, and this may he...

kitty · kitty

Today I prayed: Lord, give me a sign... I cannot go on this way. If I am not to get my beloved Hikari back, give me peace, a sign, let me know. Not an hour later a simultaneous phone call & ring of the doorbell... a neighbor 3 houses down had my fat boy. She siad he insisted...

Barbara · Barbara

ahhhh I HATE it! excuses excuses Last night we talked about going to look for a prelit Christmas tree after work tonight. Called husband at work and he now says hes not sure what time he'll even be home! Doesnt think we should try the place we discussed, doesnt think tree will fit in car, we dont have eno...

Barbara · Barbara

gotten so use to husband calling in sick that when he doesnt feel good on a Sat I wonder if he'll call in sick on Mon - has a doctor apt Tues afternoon so I wonder if instead of just leaving work early he'll blow off work completely that day I need to stop living negatively in the future and just deal with the...

Maria123 · Maria123

Just wanted to let y'all know that Cloud sends her love to y'all. She's w/out a computer these days and she's staying strong but misses everyone and asked me to say hello. ~Maria

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Hello Group, Thank you everyone who responded to my last post about my "a" not quitting marijuana. We went ahead with our weekend at the beach. My boundary was if he was going to smoke it it had to be done when the children were in bed sleeping and away from them and other people. He r...

nycbt · nycbt

After work on Sunday he went out to go to the store to get some stuff. Well after a while I called and he said he was at the store. Then an hour I called and he said he was at the bar getting hammer to come get him. I said no I am not going to get u at the bar. He called again and wanted me to come get him. The old me would...

megan · megan

Hello from Yosemite The conference is over. What a wonderful time of fellowship, learning sharing and healing. A very special thanks to our local hosts for the invitation and the fellowship. I encourage alanoners, if you can, attend a conference. I went to my loca...

sg · sg

We just got back from a weekend at a hotel w/an indoor water park as a family. This had been planned for a long time and a few weeks ago when I told my A. that either he is leaving or I am he asked if he could still come along. I didn't see a reason why he shouldn't. He hasn't drank for two weeks since that last...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, I got this at work and wanted to share it with you. The Train of Life Some folks ride the train of life Looking out the rear, Watching miles of life roll by, And marking every year. They sit in sad remembrance, Of waste...

Picowitch · Picowitch

Hi All This morning I have realised that my nickname appears to offend some people and while it would be easy to change it - the name I chose is part of my identity and part of who I am - not merely religious but my lifestyle and as I am currently doing a lot of work on regaining who I am and focusing on who I am a...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

thank you all so much for your wonderful replies. the love i know i deserve i get here. my a phoned this morning saying he didnt go to work, he didnt even call his boss. therefore is probably fired. not too happy here. he was crying and saying he needs help and he's going to get it. whatever. so he went too aa o...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

im at the end of my rope. i've had it. four binges this week. i just can't deal with this anymore. im pretty sure i want my a to leave and get out of my life for good. i don't see how i could ever be happy living in this situation. i just don't feel loved anymore. i feel used, disrespected, and unappreciated. th...

Kim · Kim

My A came back this evening to pick up his laundry. We started to talk about things a bit and we are both feeling a little depressed about the holidays. My A stated that it is a goal of his that we may be able to spend Christmas together. I said that we needed to take it a step at a time, but that a part of my...

nycbt · nycbt

On Saturday the morning was ok. Then toward the evening my husband wanted to take the car and I said no I would drive him to his friends house. On our way to his friends he was presuring me to co-sign a car I said no. He was mad but he got out of the car and went to his friends. So when he was done at his friend house...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Letting Our Defects Go "If [character defects] contributed to our health and happiness, we would not have come to such a state of desperation."Basic Text pg. 34Getting started on the Sixth and Seventh Steps isn't always easy. We may feel as though we have so much wrong with us that we are totally d...

hadit · hadit

The other night the ex calls me, we have been separated for almost three months now. Obviously has a few drinks in him, not drunk though. We had a long talk, he says he is hating the way his life is now. That he is sick and tired of being sick and tired. That he wants his life back, he wants to come home. That h...

kitty · kitty

In Japanese Hikari means the quality of brilliant light sparkiling; or 'enlightenment' - I called him Kumo at first, it means a black & white cloud. Hikari Kumo: http://star_of_asia.tripod.com/ In case anyone didn't see...

chrissy · chrissy

chuck is home for good !!. it was a great night and a wonderful day we had two parties one with his boss parents 50th anniversary and we had a great time chuck didnt even have one drink for the champagne toast i gave him my coke & he danced like crazy . before he would only dance when he was&n...

marmare · marmare

First I have to post that I am being good to myself! I am still doing my readings each day, praying, and reading the posts here. Work has been crazy and it seems everyone is needing an evaluation for their DUI's....must have been a lot of judges and attorneys on vacation during the summer mo...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

http://www.cse.unsw.edu.au/~geoffo/humour/flattery.html

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, For those who read my post "If I had One Wish" I shared in that post about concern over a co-worker who smelled of alcohol after returning from lunch. Well I was making myself just plain sick over it, so I thought about how I could talk to my supervisor about my concerns, but not get this co-work...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, I went to a great meeting last night on choices, oh wow great shares and great ESH. We all have choices in our lives and it is up to us to make them. Sometimes we make bad ones, and hopefully learn from them, and sometimes we make good ones and we learn from them as well. The best choice I ever mad...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Just an idea... (Preview) As the title of this post states, this is just an idea that I had. I have not said anything to anyone about it especially my ex the a. He has stated to me that he does want to stop drinking, and he does want to work on getting back together, but is opposed to going to AA. What I was wondering was would it be a real s...	hadit	5	687	Nov 23, 2005 by jaja
	Sharing only what you know (Preview) Wow! Ya know I thought I had a pretty decent handle on how to work my program. If you had asked me how I do that with an active A, I could tell you all kinds of stuff. Now I have been told that when they get into recovery, we just continue to do the same as we would if they were active. O...	kismetstrand	7	659	Nov 23, 2005 by bob6502
	Online Meetings (Preview) I sure have been getting a LOT out of the online Al-Anon meetings lately. I am so grateful that I found this place. I get a lot of ideas from all of you on how to take care of myself. One thing that I wanted to share with you is that someone had either mentioned this, or I read it in a post, or...	ESH	3	500	Nov 23, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Addicts and cheating (Preview) I am struggling with this question - I really am. I am a logical person and my therapist says I am trying to rationalize something that is totally irrational. Why do addicts cheat? Why when they have good things in their life do they cheat on them? Why do they make the people wh...	Cyn	9	748	Nov 23, 2005 by Dolphin123
	I am SO frustrated!! (Preview) You hear people often post here about their frustrations with the alcoholics in their lives. I am great with dealing with the alcoholic. Some times I think I have that down pat! When a struggle comes up that requires my attention and focus, I thrive...I have come to a...	captcodee	7	492	Nov 23, 2005 by Dolphin123
	ready to scream! someone please help me rationalize this! (Preview) A's friend has been without a car since at least the summer. A has been driving roundtrip about 30miles few times a day each wknd day to bring his A friend back to our house. (His friend has no car). I told A that his car wasnt going to last if he kept doing this but of course he didnt listen. Told A I was NOT goin...	Barbara	3	532	Nov 23, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Happy Thanksgiving! (Preview) Hi roomies, I know this is a day early and very early (6:30am), but with tomorrow and my work schedule this weekend, I may not get the chance to post. I want to wish each and every one of you, your family and friends a VERY HAPPY THANKSGIVING. While for the majority of us it's about the feast, the fo...	Karilynn	2	547	Nov 23, 2005 by chris52
	i need some help with in-recovery irritability, please. (Preview) Hello everyone. I've just joined the group. I need some help. My husband is just over 30 days into recovery, the first real effort he's ever made to stop drinking and fix parts of his life that need fixing. He is doing everything from supported outpatient care, AA and other groups, to reading and le...	hellion	9	870	Nov 23, 2005 by hellion
	Help! Am I an uncaring shrew? (Preview) Hi, Well I picked my husband up from the IOP after detox yesterday. I brought him back to his parents house. He came over this morning to help get the little ones off to school and left for the IOP from here. He is talking about Christmas decorations and presents. I told him about the job, but he says he...	Jeannie	6	708	Nov 23, 2005 by hellion
	Important Boundry Question (Preview) I don't want my husband to be with us on Thanksgiving if he is high. I told him this and he said "You can't tell me not to go to my own mom's house". And I told him then I did not want to go with him. I am close with his mom and uncle who lives there too. They would be devastated if I did no...	browneyes	7	783	Nov 23, 2005 by Jeannie
	Serenity Prayer (Preview) Nov 23, 05 Morning all, I have been saying the serenity prayer every morning in hopes that it will guide me during the day. I have been in a really good place lately. I have found that once I let go and let god I am able to let go of the control and realize that I have no control over anyone else but me and I am ab...	sunny1	1	608	Nov 23, 2005 by Barbara
	thanksgiven (Preview) HI all, On my way to drive my daughter to school I was thinking what am I thankfull for. Well guess what. I am thankfull for all my friends here. This board saved me and my family. To often I think it and don't say it. SO here I am. THANK YOU ALL I LOVE YOU enjoy the holiday....	nikkilou	3	510	Nov 23, 2005 by nmike
	My Sponsor (Preview) I have had a rough couple of weeks in my own head. I have been really harsh on myself, mostly with expectations. I had a friend on the board remind me that all that internal chatter can remove the direction of God (Thy will, not mine, be done). So last night I decided to phone my sponsor.&nb...	captcodee	1	493	Nov 23, 2005 by nycbt
	it only got worse (Preview) so in checking last night (again I shouldn't have) and found another girl..........."Bunny". She was nice enough to enlighten me to their relationship, and was more than graphic. She continued to call me back all night and harrass me with dirty details left on the message machi...	Kim	6	828	Nov 23, 2005 by lildee
	Harassment (Preview) my last job I had a new manager come in. He seemed to be nice. He told me about his daughter dying from cancer at the age of 11. My heart went out to him. We went on a few appts and he kept telling potential clients about his daughter dying. It became obvious he was trying to get their sympathy so they would do bu...	kissers	2	789	Nov 23, 2005 by lin0606
	Living apart in same home (Preview) I am so dettached that I don't see what the point is... I don't care to be with him anymore, but I don't want to leave either. He is sick, just as I have health problems. He isn't leaving me because of it, but what is the point in living seperate lives in the same home? josey	jrtjosey	6	622	Nov 23, 2005 by sg
	Joke (Preview) Hi roomies, I was in the chat room the other day and there was some talk of red-heads, and their hot tempers. LOL. (I resemble that remark) It was all said in fun so I just had to share this joke I got today with you all. I hope I don't offend any blondes out there. If I do please let me know and I will refrain...	Dolphin123	4	1700	Nov 23, 2005 by notsonew1111
	good news...so why do I want to bawl? (Preview) A. called me a bit ago. He went thru his assessment and starts out patient treatment a week from tomorrow. I told him I was happy for him. Inside I am irritated, frustrated and want to just sit and cry. I'm so angry at times, so disappointed and very detached.	sg	5	651	Nov 22, 2005 by Jeannie
	Gratitude and Thanksgiving (Preview) Good morning all of my wonderful MIP family :) As most everyone knows, I lost my husband a little over 3 weeks ago. After a period of shock and numbness I have spent about a week in the most unbelievable sadness I have ever felt. Until now, I didn't think that it was possible for a human bein...	txmom	11	737	Nov 22, 2005 by david62
	Communication? What's that? (Preview) My A. has seemed on top of the world since he quit cold turkey a few weeks ago. He seems anxious to get his assessment done today and start out patient rehab. I'm happy for him. Sunday I was feeling a bit down on myself trying to figure out why I can't feel the same way about him anymore..about us. Th...	sg	4	651	Nov 22, 2005 by sg
	HELP (Preview) i can't get into the chatroom and i am getting upset i have tried since 9 the morning and now it is 3:17 pm. i need help -- Edited by nycbt at 15:24, 2005-11-22 -- Edited by nycbt at 15:26, 2005-11-22	nycbt	3	457	Nov 22, 2005 by chris52
	Walk The Line movie (Preview) Hi All! I saw this movie Saturday night. It was a fabulous movie. I paid attention to the character of June Carter. She was such a great woman. She was Johnny Cash's(Johnny=alcoholic, drug abuser) true friend. She loved him but kept her boundaries with him. She accepted him for who he was. Dur...	kissers	9	618	Nov 22, 2005 by kitty
	reading over (Preview) I read over the last month of post because I like to paste them and bring them to my doctor so he can see my growth. Just in case I forgot anything it is already written in the post. I wirte everything down. I was amazing myself on the progress I made with in the month. Wow my writing shows me. The things that I h...	nycbt	3	418	Nov 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	similar story (Preview) All I am able to say at this point is by reading the board lately I feel like it is the story of my life. My ex the A his drinking and marijuana use at age 12, his not willing to be a dad, his enabling parents -his whole family (place a happy face on the family attitude) and the child (our son) who is left goin...	tea2	4	494	Nov 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Annoyed (Preview) Hi guys I feel like my h has no clue about anything sometimes!! he just irked me to no end this am He came home yesterday from his "program" and fell asleep. Didn't wake up for dinner or to say hello to anyone. but as we are going to sleep he decides to wake up and rile the kids up and...	browneyes	3	482	Nov 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Nothing is forever (Preview) One of the things my sponsor always tells me is, "nothing is forever." Not the bad, and not the good, either. Not the situation I am in. Not me. Not my happiness. Not my anger. It helps me to remember this when I'm having a bad day - as in, "this too shall pass." It helps me to remember this when I'm ha...	hopefortoday	4	471	Nov 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	trying (Preview) I HAVE BEEN TRYING ALL DAY TO GET INTO THE CHATROOM SINCE 9:00 AM AND IT KEEPS SAYING IT IS CLOSED. WHAT TO DO.	nycbt	1	401	Nov 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	acceptance and gratitude (Preview) The Magic of Gratitude and Acceptance Gratitude and acceptance are two magic tricks available to us in recovery. No matter who we are, where we are, or what we have, gratitude and acceptance work.We may eventually become so happy that we realize our present circumstances are good. Or we master o...	rosie light shines	0	445	Nov 22, 2005 by rosie light shines
	laying the foundation (Preview) Foundation First "As we begin to function in society, our creative freedom helps us sort our priorities and do the basic things first."Basic Text pg. 83No sooner do we get clean than some of us begin putting other priorities ahead of our recovery. Careers, families, relationships - all these are p...	rosie light shines	0	600	Nov 22, 2005 by rosie light shines
	depression or just plain grief (Preview) Depression All of us go through times of depression. When we were overeating, we may have felt depressed almost continually. We find that abstinence and the OA program lift us out of depression. The outward circumstances of life may not change radically, but by means of our program we experienc...	rosie light shines	0	408	Nov 22, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Hard Time Handling..... (Preview) Replying to someone else got me thinking about something I am having a problem with. My A started her new job yesterday. Seemed to enjoy it. Good for her if she is enjoying it. She is getting up at 6:30 for an 8:00 am job. She gets herself ready and nothing gets in her...	bobump	8	655	Nov 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	my A is at the hospital (Preview) Got a call from my A today that he followed up with our GP and he was sending him to the hospital for a CAT scan. I told him that I would meet him at the hospital, he said he didn't want me to leave work. I said I wouldn't Iwould finish out my day and meet him there after work. (the hospital is in between wor...	Kim	5	565	Nov 22, 2005 by Jeannie
	Alanon Book Excerpt #1 (Preview) I have picked excerpts in the book that seem most important. It would be too much to type everything, so here it goes. Book: How Al-Anon Works for Families & Friends of Alcoholics Learning About Alcoholism Alcoholism is a family disease. Compulsive drinking a...	kissers	14	1638	Nov 22, 2005 by Jeannie
	I told him he's in denial (Preview) We had the best day yesterday - we visited my family and enjoyed each other's company all day. On the way home I thought to myself that I should mention to him that if he needed anything he should stop at the store. We live in the country, a trip to the store takes at least 30 minutes. I di...	sallyb	4	600	Nov 22, 2005 by nycbt
	update (Preview) well my a met up with an addictions counsellor and will see him again in a week. they set up some goals and plans for what to do with pressure or the urge creeps up to drink or use again. im not getting my hopes up but i will see what happens. i will stand by my man down the road to recovery but will have to leave if...	notsonew1111	3	480	Nov 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	A good kick in the a$$ (Preview) Well, here I am 2 in the morning. Just back from the hospital. A got his appendix out.....a long night and what a fool I was!!! Taking his belongings from the hospital his phone was there and a call to "kerri" was made Sat. night. I immediately felt as if someone had kicked me in the appendix....	Kim	3	660	Nov 22, 2005 by marmare
	Daughter not doing good (Preview) As I sit here my 15 year old is in her room alseep. She should be in school. I have tried everything to get her to go to school,but she refuses to go. The next thing is the school putting a PINS on her. She did not use this weekend thank God,but her behavior is the same. I'm sooooooooo tired of this mess. ...	zoomie	9	628	Nov 22, 2005 by zoomie
	Input Needed for An Idea (Preview) Hi everyone! I have purchased almost all of the Alanon books and I was thinking I could start a discussion by typing in excerpts from one of the books. Would anyone be interested? If so, let me know and I will set aside time every evening on a weekly basis. I know not everyone has the books, and this may he...	kissers	6	531	Nov 22, 2005 by chris52
	losing hope - Prayers (Preview) Today I prayed: Lord, give me a sign... I cannot go on this way. If I am not to get my beloved Hikari back, give me peace, a sign, let me know. Not an hour later a simultaneous phone call & ring of the doorbell... a neighbor 3 houses down had my fat boy. She siad he insisted...	kitty	6	517	Nov 22, 2005 by leo
	promises/discussions not followed through with - excuses excuses (Preview) ahhhh I HATE it! excuses excuses Last night we talked about going to look for a prelit Christmas tree after work tonight. Called husband at work and he now says hes not sure what time he'll even be home! Doesnt think we should try the place we discussed, doesnt think tree will fit in car, we dont have eno...	Barbara	7	687	Nov 21, 2005 by kitty
	I project myself negatively into the future (Preview) gotten so use to husband calling in sick that when he doesnt feel good on a Sat I wonder if he'll call in sick on Mon - has a doctor apt Tues afternoon so I wonder if instead of just leaving work early he'll blow off work completely that day I need to stop living negatively in the future and just deal with the...	Barbara	5	497	Nov 21, 2005 by marmare
	Cloud (Preview) Just wanted to let y'all know that Cloud sends her love to y'all. She's w/out a computer these days and she's staying strong but misses everyone and asked me to say hello. ~Maria	Maria123	3	495	Nov 21, 2005 by nikkilou
	I feel I'm making progress (Preview) Hello Group, Thank you everyone who responded to my last post about my "a" not quitting marijuana. We went ahead with our weekend at the beach. My boundary was if he was going to smoke it it had to be done when the children were in bed sleeping and away from them and other people. He r...	twinmom2	3	631	Nov 21, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Sunday got stronger (Preview) After work on Sunday he went out to go to the store to get some stuff. Well after a while I called and he said he was at the store. Then an hour I called and he said he was at the bar getting hammer to come get him. I said no I am not going to get u at the bar. He called again and wanted me to come get him. The old me would...	nycbt	6	427	Nov 21, 2005 by lin0606
	Serenity in Yosemite II (Preview) Hello from Yosemite The conference is over. What a wonderful time of fellowship, learning sharing and healing. A very special thanks to our local hosts for the invitation and the fellowship. I encourage alanoners, if you can, attend a conference. I went to my loca...	megan	5	601	Nov 21, 2005 by Karilynn
	No doubts, no second thoughts (Preview) We just got back from a weekend at a hotel w/an indoor water park as a family. This had been planned for a long time and a few weeks ago when I told my A. that either he is leaving or I am he asked if he could still come along. I didn't see a reason why he shouldn't. He hasn't drank for two weeks since that last...	sg	4	518	Nov 21, 2005 by sunny1
	The Train of Life (Preview) Hi all, I got this at work and wanted to share it with you. The Train of Life Some folks ride the train of life Looking out the rear, Watching miles of life roll by, And marking every year. They sit in sad remembrance, Of waste...	Dolphin123	1	456	Nov 21, 2005 by canadianguy
	Goodbye and Thank YOu (Preview) Hi All This morning I have realised that my nickname appears to offend some people and while it would be easy to change it - the name I chose is part of my identity and part of who I am - not merely religious but my lifestyle and as I am currently doing a lot of work on regaining who I am and focusing on who I am a...	Picowitch	23	4697	Nov 21, 2005 by kismetstrand
	thank you (Preview) thank you all so much for your wonderful replies. the love i know i deserve i get here. my a phoned this morning saying he didnt go to work, he didnt even call his boss. therefore is probably fired. not too happy here. he was crying and saying he needs help and he's going to get it. whatever. so he went too aa o...	notsonew1111	1	434	Nov 21, 2005 by Dolphin123
	send some comfort please (Preview) im at the end of my rope. i've had it. four binges this week. i just can't deal with this anymore. im pretty sure i want my a to leave and get out of my life for good. i don't see how i could ever be happy living in this situation. i just don't feel loved anymore. i feel used, disrespected, and unappreciated. th...	notsonew1111	8	510	Nov 21, 2005 by TLC2
	holidays and family (Preview) My A came back this evening to pick up his laundry. We started to talk about things a bit and we are both feeling a little depressed about the holidays. My A stated that it is a goal of his that we may be able to spend Christmas together. I said that we needed to take it a step at a time, but that a part of my...	Kim	3	515	Nov 21, 2005 by Tiger2006
	I slipped (Preview) On Saturday the morning was ok. Then toward the evening my husband wanted to take the car and I said no I would drive him to his friends house. On our way to his friends he was presuring me to co-sign a car I said no. He was mad but he got out of the car and went to his friends. So when he was done at his friend house...	nycbt	4	482	Nov 21, 2005 by Tiger2006
	letting go of defects HURTS???? (Preview) Letting Our Defects Go "If [character defects] contributed to our health and happiness, we would not have come to such a state of desperation."Basic Text pg. 34Getting started on the Sixth and Seventh Steps isn't always easy. We may feel as though we have so much wrong with us that we are totally d...	rosie light shines	1	671	Nov 21, 2005 by Tiger2006
	He says I need to get a grip!! (Preview) The other night the ex calls me, we have been separated for almost three months now. Obviously has a few drinks in him, not drunk though. We had a long talk, he says he is hating the way his life is now. That he is sick and tired of being sick and tired. That he wants his life back, he wants to come home. That h...	hadit	2	533	Nov 21, 2005 by gknee
	Hikari the Enlightened One (Preview) In Japanese Hikari means the quality of brilliant light sparkiling; or 'enlightenment' - I called him Kumo at first, it means a black & white cloud. Hikari Kumo: http://star_of_asia.tripod.com/ In case anyone didn't see...	kitty	2	513	Nov 21, 2005 by rosie light shines
	it was a great day (Preview) chuck is home for good !!. it was a great night and a wonderful day we had two parties one with his boss parents 50th anniversary and we had a great time chuck didnt even have one drink for the champagne toast i gave him my coke & he danced like crazy . before he would only dance when he was&n...	chrissy	8	574	Nov 21, 2005 by chrissy
	Update (Preview) First I have to post that I am being good to myself! I am still doing my readings each day, praying, and reading the posts here. Work has been crazy and it seems everyone is needing an evaluation for their DUI's....must have been a lot of judges and attorneys on vacation during the summer mo...	marmare	5	439	Nov 21, 2005 by Angie
	What Your Computer Should Do For You! (Preview) http://www.cse.unsw.edu.au/~geoffo/humour/flattery.html	Dolphin123	6	941	Nov 20, 2005 by Dolphin123
	One of the Hadest things I have ever done! (Preview) Hi all, For those who read my post "If I had One Wish" I shared in that post about concern over a co-worker who smelled of alcohol after returning from lunch. Well I was making myself just plain sick over it, so I thought about how I could talk to my supervisor about my concerns, but not get this co-work...	Dolphin123	3	721	Nov 20, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Choices (Preview) Hi all, I went to a great meeting last night on choices, oh wow great shares and great ESH. We all have choices in our lives and it is up to us to make them. Sometimes we make bad ones, and hopefully learn from them, and sometimes we make good ones and we learn from them as well. The best choice I ever mad...	Dolphin123	5	508	Nov 20, 2005 by Dolphin123
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.