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How do I deal with this??
(Preview)
Hi All, My AH has been sober for 2 months now, after being in a locked detox facility for a week and getting a DUI. He has until 3/15/08 to complete a 7 week, three time per week intensive out patient alcohol program by order of the Court. He said to me Saturday night that he had thought about having a coupl...
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Chetch
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10
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548
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The New Year Started Out Bad
(Preview)
Hub came in from work, fed the cat. I was all dressed up, makeup on, etc. He never even looked at me. Drove to my daughter's to watch baby while she went to Walmart. Came home, hubby was across the street with his buddies drinking. He came in, I was on the couch. He took a shower, I thought "maybe&qu...
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Becky1
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8
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712
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a little humor to begin the new year
(Preview)
(((((Friends)))))), I got such a kick out of this and hope you do as well. For those of you, like me, who love the computer forum and are grateful to have it to supplement our face to face program, this'll make you laugh. LIVING WILL Last night my daughter and I were sitting in the den and I said to her, &qu...
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Maria123
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7
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469
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New Beginnings
(Preview)
My ex has been calling and e-mailing me. I haven't answered any e-mails or calls. I won't do it anymore. One of his e-mails said he was worried about me. I wanted to believe it, but the reality is it is not true. I keep praying to God that he will seek help. I don't want to see anything bad happen to him. I wish...
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kissers
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3
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275
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Threatening to show up at my house
(Preview)
My ex sent me an email threatening to show up at my house. He thinks no contact from me is me punishing him. I really don't know if I should keep my eye out and wait for him to leave if he is out front of my home before pulling in or go about my business as usual. I don't even know what to say to him if he does show up....
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kissers
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4
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595
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controlling behavior
(Preview)
I have had a relationship with a friend of mine (he is an ex boyfriend) who has many addiction issues for over 7 years. During that time sometimes he has been there for me. He gave me $500 earlier this year. At other times he has been incredibly controling and dismissive. After letting the A go and havin...
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maresie
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1
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949
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Gratitude for Each Day
(Preview)
Happy New Year ((((Family))))) I woke up this morning like I have every morning for the last 45 years. For that, as I am every morning, I am grateful. I slept in late because I had been up late celebrating New Years Eve with a few friends at my house. We played some games, shared fellowship and even danced a...
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david62
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2
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494
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i asked him to leave, he said "warm the rope up"
(Preview)
i apologize in advance for this being so long! i posted earlier on this board about what my A was doing/saying, and got some excellent advice (i'm sorry i'm not better about posting thank you's!). a lot of it i had gone through way back with a codependent partner, in counseling, so i just lived my life and...
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sadako
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3
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1628
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The Ultimatum I got and the other swing of the pendulum
(Preview)
After all the support that I have been receiving from you guys (thank you thank you thank you!!!!!), I mustered up enough strength to talk to my AH. I told him that I was using this message board and would be trying very hard to work on understanding his addiction and behaviors and what would be some bett...
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Lost but still trying
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3
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442
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Disabilitating fear
(Preview)
A couple of weeks ago I was faced with the following questions: What can you remember doing wrong because of fear?Did you do anything illegal or immoral because of your timidity and fear?Well, I have been contemplating these two questions and wrote down a number of situations I was in and the reaction...
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Heartbroken
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4
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922
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I need to go back to a meeting TOMORROW
(Preview)
Hello everyone. I hope you are having a lovely new years.
I am posting as a way of committing myself to getting back to a meeting tomorrow. I have been to three meetings so far, and each time I came away feeling stronger and more relaxed. They are so useful. And yet, each time I have to convince myself to g...
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tenacious
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5
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665
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Jan. Business meeting
(Preview)
Hello everyone! This sunday at 9pm est, will be our next monthly business meeting. The meeting will be held in the chat room. All are welcome to attend! As of now there is no new business on the agenda. If anyone has a topic they would possibly like to have placed on the agenda, please send me a private me...
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david62
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0
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256
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Fifth DUI
(Preview)
A-BF got his fifth dui last night. He has been sitting in jail ever since. They are on a skeleton crew and what usually takes 12-24 hours to "cite out" could take double. I am doing as well as I can, although I will admit it is upsetting. I am trying to detach this time and carry on. Had a nic...
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Leetle
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5
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430
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Taking care of me doesn't have to be expensive!
(Preview)
(((((((Family)))))), Good morning and Happy New Year! I got to thinking last night that we all urge each other to do something extra nice for ourselves, take care of ourselves or treat ourselves to something extra special. Well after the holidays that can be an expensive venture or maybe we just do...
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Karilynn
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6
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599
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Update On My Mom and Wish For You
(Preview)
Hi All, We brought my Mom home from the hospital after the doctor used intraveinious antibiotics to calm the inflamation of her gall bladder down. She also has oral antibiotics to take at home. They said that it could never bother her again or it could come back and they would have no choice but to surgic...
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jonibaloni21
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6
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553
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Another Birthday person!!!!!
(Preview)
Happy birthday to our darling Stillkickin!!!! Have fun today kiddo!!! Love, SenoraBob -- Edited by bob6502 at 21:24, 2007-12-28
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bob6502
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13
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495
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Happ New Year
(Preview)
Happy New Year to all Miracles In Progress Family Members!
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John
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6
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465
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too much time to think
(Preview)
I have spent way too much time thinking the past several days. Holidays/weekends are always that way. With spouse sick for several weeks and me recuperating from cancer treatment, we just haven't had much quality of life lately. And of course, there is the periodic traumas of the afflicted son and t...
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omajoy
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3
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492
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time for some gratitude
(Preview)
HI All, I went to a face-to-face meeting this morning and realized what a great place it was to spend the last day of the year. I've done a lot of "expressing" here this past week and I so appreciated the forum. That said, it is time for my gratitude: For this moment, I feel content.... My kids...
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Loupiness
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3
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531
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progress not perfection
(Preview)
I have probably one more month on my job, two at the most. They do not have someone to replace me lined up so I dont' know they will just let me go at the end of January. In the meantime I've been applying for jobs. I went on one interview this week. I have a shot at it. There is one other person in the works. I...
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maresie
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3
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551
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The Disease is Taking a Toll
(Preview)
I am trying to take care of myself. Christmas was OK, I was wanting so much for my daughter, her new little girl (5 weeks old) and her family, me and my husband to all be able to be together. But it was not to be....due to the damage from Alcoholism. But hubby and I exchanged gifts, had a good Christmas with...
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Becky1
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7
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594
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Dishonesty within the program
(Preview)
My wife is an A and is cross addicted to ephedrine. She is attending meetings 6 days a week volunteers at the intergroup office 3 hours a week reads all of the serenity books but continues to use ephedrine. She will use before and after meetings but within the group she does not discuss her continued us...
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davehill60
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3
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645
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I don't want any program.
(Preview)
As I read this message board you all talk about the program. The way that I am feeling I don't want a program to make me feel better. I just want to be mad and stay mad. I haven't started any program and I don't want to. I read a message board that said, " I can't change him I can only change myself."...
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Paws
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12
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859
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Quinine?
(Preview)
Can anyone tell me what role quinine plays in the treatment of alcoholism? My A is taking it and I am not quite sure what it is supposed to do. I have google it and came up with too many hits to even guess which one I should be looking at. Thanks all, lilms
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lilms
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9
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507
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NO MORE DRUNK SEX!
(Preview)
I am so tired of pretending! The sex is awful. it has passed it's glory days. I am too full of resentment for it ever to be good again. I lay there with my eyes rolled in the back of my head hoping it will all be over soon. Sometimes I feel I want to throw up from the terrible alcohol breath barreling up my nos...
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Paws
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5
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898
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Alkathon
(Preview)
Tonight I am going to go to an alkathon! I have never been to one before...it begins at 6PM at a local church and lasts until lunch time tomorrow. There is free dinner and food throughout and lots of non-alcoholic beverages. I think I am going to check it out. I will let you know what it was like. Then again,...
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Jean4444
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4
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583
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Finally Told Him
(Preview)
some of you may remember from my first post here that my bf kicked me and my son out of his home when he was drunk. I've been living on my own now for over a month and I hate it! I thought I would love it, being away from the drama that happens when he drinks. The feeling I used to get when I came home from work an...
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wen5454
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6
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590
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HAPPY NEW YEAR TO MY MIP FAMILY!!
(Preview)
(((((((((Family))))))) A very Happy New Year to all of you!!! And a prosperous 2008!!! Prayers for all of you that this year will be a better year for all of us. Love and Blessings, Claudia
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cookie1971
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5
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499
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Correct Word Choices
(Preview)
How I learned to word things differently, especially about myself when the psychiatrist I had the longest decided that from the next visit, I could not use the phrase, "I can't" but had to replace it with "I choose not to," or "I can't decide."
Whatever, I learned t...
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Euoria
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5
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495
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they're almost home
(Preview)
My family is on their way home from their snow trip. I wanted the kids to have a great time and they did! However... Warning - here is my selfish non-al-anon rant - One of the mean things my ah has said to me is that we never had fun together, including on the few vacations we had. This was the first time the...
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Loupiness
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3
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478
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Happy New Year!
(Preview)
(((((((Family)))))), To my world wide Alanon family, I wish you a VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR! May it be filled with LOTS of love, laughter, hugs, kisses, serenity, play time, good health, kindness and most of all peace. I treasure each and everyone of you. There was a wonderful old movie with Igmar Berg...
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Karilynn
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3
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292
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God Bless Us EVERYONE...please
(Preview)
Roomies, Wow! What does the Good Lord In His infinite Wisdom want us to learn from these trying times???? Today , my brother showed up at the hospital to see my mom. Today, me and my sister went about 1:30pm and she was laying there asleep. She awoke and drank some apple juice and hurt. We got the nurse to gi...
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jonibaloni21
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9
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572
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Another life lost…to the disease
(Preview)
And ladies and gentlemen, make no mistake, alcoholism is a disease, genetic, progressive and fatal.I have not posted here in awhilebeen divorced 1 ½ years from my alcoholic ex-husbandYesterday, in my penthouse with a view of NYC, I was preparing to go to the movies with my fiancée and his 12 year ol...
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megan
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13
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696
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The new year
(Preview)
Ya know how everyone gets down about Christams? Not me, even when it was the most emotionally sucky Christams ever. I let the spirit and society carry me. Why not? It's once a year, there's the spiritual aspect to it, it's my birthday. I don't know why but Christams, no matter what, I can do with little or...
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serendipity
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5
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514
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Step two question
(Preview)
greetings to all, First, thank you so much to all who replied to my last two posts. It was tremendous support and encouragement through this holiday period. Dealing with kids leaving the nest more & more plus teens while working al anon program has me in an emotional ball of energy at times exage...
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ddub
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6
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483
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The inconsistency and consistency of the disease
(Preview)
My AH was a dream husband yesterday - did the laundry, took care of the kids, picked up the house, sent me out for an hour to go write. We even went to Church together. It's all just enough for me to keep hanging on waiting for this man (whom he really wants to be) to take residency. It is all so inconsisten...
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optimistundone
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5
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480
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I'm a busybody
(Preview)
Hi everyone! I haven't been posting much because my AH expressed his dislike of this board (I am being polite) and he has hardly left the house this week due to the holiday and what that does to him, if you know what I mean! Anyway, I am sitting here this morning while the rest of the house sleeps and I starte...
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babysteps
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7
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458
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No more waiting
(Preview)
I received the call last night at 12:50 a.m. that my A BF passed away. I was told that he went peacefully and was in no pain and I am very thankful for that. I loved him very, very much and I will miss him very, very much. Through this tragedyI am going to tell my dad that I can not stand to loose another pe...
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Mariedl05
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9
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443
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Lost all serenity...
(Preview)
...running on empty. Not even one tear left inside of me to shed. Had enough of the strife. Cannot get my head around this disease that has caused years of dysfunction [and is still causing dysfunction] for me, my family and so many other people I love. Stop the world I want to jump off.
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Heartbroken
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7
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404
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New things for the new year
(Preview)
Well the new year is fast approaching and with it comes a whole new set of things for my household. After a few chaotic years and lots of up and downs and very strange happenings--I am due any day now!!! The doctor doesn't think I'll make it another week. After saying that I was ready to give birth that n...
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hudsond
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3
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424
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Prayer Request
(Preview)
I am asking for prayers for the family of two restaurant employees in my neighborhood that were killed last night. I have family in town who love this restaurant and always request it when they are visiting. As a result, we know the folks that run it, especially the gentleman that always works in t...
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Leetle
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9
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436
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Shrinking and Growing
(Preview)
I have come to a recent realization that what I have been doing and what I continue to do is to shrink the A's in my life and grow my HP in my life. If my daily life were a pie, I am systematically, day in and day out making the slice for my A's smaller and smaller and the majority of the pie is going to my HP. This pi...
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Jean4444
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1
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443
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Help please with a medical issue!
(Preview)
(((((Family))), A very early good morning to you all. I need your assistance please if you can. Back in August hubby lost his very good pyschiatrist for a better job. She spent so much time getting him stable with benzodiapzapines (sp?). She really worked wonders with him. After she left they fo...
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Karilynn
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6
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642
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Still thinking I can affect this disease...
(Preview)
You know I just went through a little bout of thinking that somehow I could make my AH happy!!
I seem to recall that there was a time a really long time ago when it seemed that I did. But that was an illusion, albeit a very tantalizing one because it was one hell of a year. He said I made him happy. He said I mad...
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Jean4444
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8
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599
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I'm new to the board and I need advice, please HELP!
(Preview)
I'm sure compared to many of your past events and horrible occurences, this might not be a big thing, but I need advice. My mother is an alcoholic, she has been my whole life. I am a happily married adult with two beautiful children. Several times, she has destroyed key moments in my life. Today is my...
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spagirl
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8
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543
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I wish tthere was a button to push for help
(Preview)
I wish there was a button to push for help. I was in chat twice this morning early. There was a person there who was asking very weird off the wall questions. They were not obscene or anything like that. Just quite confusing. I left once and returned. Three people left suddenly ...they they had been run o...
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afglin
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2
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330
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leaving Christmas
(Preview)
Today has been taking it an hour or less at a time. I am leaving Christmas behind. What little decor I did is now gone and stored. The gifts we were to have opened with our grandbaby are hidden in the closet once more...maybe later. Could not get two different doctors to answer their phones today, so no mo...
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omajoy
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10
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11248
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Being humbled
(Preview)
Looking back over this past year, I can say that I have been humbled. I have stuck my feet in my mouth more times than I can count. I have realized things are not always what they seem, and no amount of wishing can make it so. I have been thinking about how here on this board we all feel so connected. We are a fa...
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Loupiness
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6
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360
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Missing our friends...
(Preview)
Many of our friends seem to be missing... Among the frequent posters were Kim65, CarolinaGirl and FriendofYours Helllooooo, are you out there? Lou
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Loupiness
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1
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382
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I have noticed that at eden.....
(Preview)
old pig in the house is so much easier than a young one who gets into the dogs food, gets into the bird seed becuz ya left it down, takes off with your sandwich, when you go to get your drink pulls the covers off your bed, stands on your long nightgown when you bend over to pick something up that the cat knocked...
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debilyn
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7
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654
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My A is dying-literally
(Preview)
The A in my life is my ex, we were married 22 yrs. I just came in from hosp. My sons found him collapsed on garage floor on Christmas Eve. He is in end stage liver disease. I'm also a nurse. I don't think he is going to get out of this one. My sons are hurting so bad, this brings back all sorts of fellings. ...
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Grace7
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7
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792
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Itervetio- remember I am missig letter after m
(Preview)
A yo e ever staged a i terve tio ? A yo e experie ce success? If you ca u dersta d my message... :)
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Codependent
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4
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541
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HE DID IT AGAIN!!!
(Preview)
My son got arrested for being drunk in public and trespassing. He was at a party at a friends house and got so drunk that when he went out in front to smoke a cigarette and took a little walk he got so disoriented that he ended up in the wrong house (a neighbors). It was around 12:30 am, he opened the front doo...
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roxygirl5
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5
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449
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Can it get worse...probably!
(Preview)
Well, my resolve to attend f to f Friday fell through. My husband could not handle the grandchild alone as his illness continues to lay him low. I will continue to plan for next week. We kept child TH and FRI while his mother worked (well, I don't think she really worked one of the days, but that's another...
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omajoy
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2
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483
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Feeling weak
(Preview)
I don't know what it is. Well I know what it is.......but I thought I was getting a handle on it......yet here I am feeling really weak and lonely. The holidays are done (whew), but I've got this other hurdle that's been in my subconcious for some time now. This New Year's Eve will mark the 30th anniver...
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round3
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7
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551
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I guess I am being paid back......
(Preview)
My boss told everyone they were to be at work on Saturday. He gave me 3 days notice and it was 2 days before Christmas. I was not able to get a sitter with 3 days notice on the weekend before Christmas. I sent my boss a response telling him I was not able to work on Saturday. I received my paycheck today which wa...
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kissers
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8
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653
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With no hugs
(Preview)
I just wanted to share this. You guys know where I am. I was leaning over hugging one of my fat hairy cats and it came to me. What I need is to be hugged by someone, and feel for that moment I don't have to do anything. I can cry and relax, and let it out. It being the pain, the memories, the hell of it all. Just be wi...
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debilyn
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12
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709
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Suddenly it's all too much...
(Preview)
the isolation, the aloneness has got to me and I feel drained and empty. It all seems so unnatural to me and I feel that I want to shout at the top of my voice... "HEY YOU LOT ", [meaning those members of my maternal and paternal family and my grown up children], "I am alive and I need you to at...
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Heartbroken
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7
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531
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Hubby on vacation!
(Preview)
((((((((((Family)))))))), Good morning family. I hope all is well with you and your families, and that you are recouperating from the chaos of the holiday. Christmas for us was quite. AH was sober (yeah) but hadn't been feeling well enough to travel to see the kids and grandkids for Christmas. I...
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Karilynn
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5
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555
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Marisie
(Preview)
ver are u?? Hey that animal sanctuary is desperate for Help!!! It is not hard work. they may even help ya move to get there. I don't have much, true, but you could stop here on your way and rest a night. Please Mary the people are so nice, you would have a home for you and animals to. hugs debilyn
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debilyn
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1
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303
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