|
|
Judgement
(Preview)
What do you do to stop feeling judgemental? It's bringing ME down and upsetting me but for whatever reason (refusal to examine my OWN issues/character defects) I can't seem to stop. I am so filled with resentments I can't even consentrate on doing a 4th step.....UGH!!!! And quick tricks to get me on th...
|
freeagain
|
4
|
1557
|
|
|
|
Letting Go, Letting God, Reclaiming our Lives, Releaseing Resentment - (Dedicated Video)
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, You recently had an exchange on this board with Arinna599, who had posted in the past few days about her previous marriage of 11 years, and the abuses she endured at the hands of her ex husband. I read her post, your replies to it, and her husbands post.. I am not sure exactly why, but I was co...
|
John
|
6
|
1187
|
|
|
|
Don't know how to handle situation
(Preview)
My 37year old single daughter is addicted to prescription drugs - in May 2010, we brought her home from Texas - not realizing this - she lived with grandma for a couple of months - found a minimum wage job and moved out (family insisted). In this short time she has lost 2 jobs (minimum wage type - she has a c...
|
MarshaB
|
9
|
1354
|
|
|
|
Relapse
(Preview)
Daughter has relapsed - child's father threatening to break up relationship - etc., etc., she just doesn't get it and i guess hasn't hit bottom yet - i am struggling with letting go and letting God! I love her and my grandson and hate to see them struggling so much - just wish they could all see that addic...
|
Mary K
|
2
|
604
|
|
|
|
I'm angry
(Preview)
I'm angry at the 12 Steps! How dare they be worded so simply, yet be so hard to do! So, I'm angry at them today. I'm angry because I know I have to do the work, but the work is hard. I want someone else to do it for me. So, I'm angry! I want to run away. I want to run as far and as fast as I can. And when I get tir...
|
Very Very Tired
|
11
|
1719
|
|
|
|
someone commit me please....
(Preview)
You know those places ya see on tv, where if you want a cup of tea someone brings it? And there are group therapy sessions and private ones? I picture all my dogs are super clean and my bedding is white. I can live in a white nightgown. Not have to think about anything. Trying not to now. Put my potted pigs on C...
|
Debilyn
|
12
|
1279
|
|
|
|
I don't know what to do anymore
(Preview)
My husband and I celebrated our 3 year anniversary 4 days ago. He hit the bottle again last night. I, of course, did what I always do when this happens and became very hateful. I say mean things. Which is of course better than what I want to do, which is squeeze his head off of his neck. Not really of course,...
|
EstellineGirl
|
4
|
1072
|
|
|
|
Not sure where I belong..but I'm terrified
(Preview)
Good morning, I went to 3 alanon meetings in the last 2 weeks. I haven't said a word. Honestly, I don't know where to begin. I said I was a "newcomer" at the first meeting, but I wasn't in a strict sense. I attend alanon about 5 times 2 years ago. I'm just not sure if this is where I belong but I know t...
|
kyrie
|
6
|
785
|
|
|
|
Need Help with letting go
(Preview)
Am I suppose to ignore my addicted husband's denial? I sent him out of the house to get help, he's getting it, but cannot come back until I feel ready for him to return home. My condition is that he is to be an actively recovering person if he chooses to live with me and the kids. He has discovered his ch...
|
Worth It
|
5
|
788
|
|
|
|
Trying not to scream at him
(Preview)
Frustrating morning. He came home around 3am slamming doors and cursing. I pretended to be asleep. Don't know what all the anger was for, don't really care. When I got up this morning, I walked out to the laundry room and there was a girls watch and scarf just sitting there. How rude of him. Sitting there...
|
Vickif
|
7
|
1018
|
|
|
|
A Start
(Preview)
It's been so hard for me to know just where to begin. I had decided in December (I think) to begin going to Al-anon as hubby said he was going to begin AA meetingss. We were gone for a week of vacation, and a week after we returned our youngest son committed suicie at 23. I was fortunate to find this site a few w...
|
Sandy_K
|
4
|
548
|
|
|
|
unmanageable is exactly the right word...
(Preview)
for my life lately. The bills are never ending - I manage all the finances alone despite many offers to share the responsibility w/my AH. The parenting - yup, got it. The kids have been having a really hard time lately, they sense that things are not right, they pick up on my anxiety, add to that snow da...
|
newleaf66
|
4
|
1157
|
|
|
|
finally at an open AA meeting!
(Preview)
I finally got my message across at an open AA meeting last night. I can't say all I shared but I think I opened some of the AAs eyes there. I guess what I needed was a captive audience & I got it! I can't say that I don't get through at an alanon meeting but they are so small & I missed my monthly big ala...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
1
|
714
|
|
|
|
Message Form John
(Preview)
MIP Family FYI I just received a phone call from John. He told me to relay to everyone that it will be 2:00 pm est tomorrow (Sunday) before the video he posted today can be uploaded on the MIP site due to technical problems. He has no computer available today. He said he is so far out in the country toda...
|
RLC
|
0
|
554
|
|
|
|
She's Newly Recovering, and Wants to Move In
(Preview)
So my sometimes in-recovery girlfriend seems to have turned over a new leaf since last week. Last Friday she was so drunk she ended up in the hospital (0.5 BAC, no that's not a typo). Her bloodwork showed liver problems. Having a bunch of usually jaded ER docs tell her that her "normal" level...
|
B_L
|
10
|
797
|
|
|
|
Working on myself but today I miss him
(Preview)
My ABF sent me a text two weeks ago....it said I don't want any contact with you. We had been having problems and going back and fourth about a lot. It started at thanksgiving. He has been sober for three years so he says. He has become addicted to poker. We hadn't seen each other in two weeks when I got...
|
parfait624
|
2
|
788
|
|
|
|
Question About Meetings
(Preview)
I found a meeting in my area but I won't be able to go until next week. I'm a little nervous because I don't know what to expect but I know I really need to go. I read some of the FAQs on the website and read the 12 steps and some of the meeting materials. I am a little confused though. A lot of the stuff I read s...
|
delhommefan
|
3
|
598
|
|
|
|
So, he's left me...
(Preview)
This past week has been a whirlwind of emotions. I have started recognizing my severity of codependency. I mentioned this to my AB, and he was completely confused by the fact that I have been blaming him for months and months because of my anger, depression, etc., and now I am blaming myself. I tried to e...
|
faith84
|
6
|
768
|
|
|
|
Nick News Program About children of alcoholism
(Preview)
http://www.nick.com/videos/clip/kids-of-alcoholics-full.html
|
david62
|
2
|
769
|
|
|
|
Resentments, and how do I let them go?
(Preview)
How do you go from saying out loud "I forgive you" to actually being able to let the thing go? Maybe it's different for each of us, but I'm really at a loss on how to do this. Some of you may have read my post about my ABF and his flirtatious texting with his ex (also in AA). I've reached the point whe...
|
Rhivenn
|
9
|
912
|
|
|
|
Making choices
(Preview)
I've been working in a dysfunctional, chaotic, completely unfair environment for 18 months. My contract is up in 5 months. For those 18 months I've spent a lot of time resenting, cataloguing the problems which are numerous and daily. With 5 months to go on the contract I've switched my energy to lo...
|
maresie
|
2
|
530
|
|
|
|
wait and see game
(Preview)
Well as I posted before. I wrote my AH a letter and did give it to him. It went surprisely well. He was not angry, but did appear a little worried. We talked for a while I stood to my guns and am expecting him to join AA or some other support group and begin the process. I do understand that he can't do this for me...
|
kari419
|
1
|
542
|
|
|
|
Fiancé has been sober for 1 year, is it too soon to get married this spring?
(Preview)
My fiancé had been sober for 13 years when he relapsed during 4 months during 2009-10. He got sober again last February, and just celebrated his 1 year anniversary this week. I'm so proud of him, but should I be insecure about his recovery? During this past year we relocated from NYC back to our hometown...
|
Loonareclipse
|
12
|
1150
|
|
|
|
Driving in the Dark....
(Preview)
The Following was not Writting by Me, but found it very Enlightening... I did "Alter" a Few Words just so it would fit our Forum... It Came from a Veteran Friends Article... Hope you all Enjoy it as Much as I did.... I've always thought that I Could get through just about Anything if HP would t...
|
Jozie
|
2
|
1126
|
|
|
|
My Story-- Broke my engagement to ACOA
(Preview)
This is my second post on here. I wrote on here last year in January about my ACOA fiance who was abusive to me, and also my ACOA Mom. I am going to write everything that has happened to me recently. I hope it helps someone in the way thatI have been helped by reading people's stories. Here goes I left an...
|
Ferny
|
5
|
2035
|
|
|
|
It works!
(Preview)
AH and I had a very long talk today about a lot of things. Insecurities from our past, fears, anxieties about the future, and of course about drinking. It was very heartfelt and tearful on both ends. At the end of the conversation he says to me, "I was dreading how you were going to treat me after m...
|
ilovedogs
|
2
|
668
|
|
|
|
Had a hard day
(Preview)
I had a hard day today. My A bf kept texting me while I was working, I didn't answer because I can't at work. After about 10 texts, I checked the phone. BF wanted to borrow $20 for food since he has nothing to eat and said he was coming to my workplace. I told him I didn't have cash and I would talk to him after wo...
|
Honeypie
|
8
|
798
|
|
|
|
group inventory
(Preview)
Is there a recommended interval between group inventories? The manual states periodic intervals. I was under the impression it was every 2-3 years. Is it necessary to ask all the questions in the G8 form?
Our group did an inventory 3 years ago and found it exceptionally helpful. We learned a great...
|
elpis
|
4
|
1146
|
|
|
|
Hi. New here.
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I'm new and have been reading some of the posts here. I see that my story isn't much different than the rest here but I feel very alone right now. I have been with my boyfriend, sometimes fiancé for 11 years. We have a six year old son together. I think, I hope, I have finally reached the end of my...
|
Vickif
|
4
|
556
|
|
|
|
Trying To Crawl Out......
(Preview)
of the rabbit hole I have fell in. I have been struggling for about 6 mos with unbearable FEAR, the type of fear that makes you sit straight up in bed at 2:00 A.M., the type that puts your stomach into a knot, I have lost about thirty pounds during the last four months because I have no desire to eat. I just ha...
|
DreamsOver
|
5
|
789
|
|
|
|
Made a decision
(Preview)
I have posted about my AH and how confused I have been regarding what to do next. Well I have decided that no matter how much I love my H I love my kids more. Period. So I wrote him a letter telling him how I feel about his drinking, past problems that probably contribute to his drinking, and that I am not goin...
|
kari419
|
5
|
524
|
|
|
|
learning to self focus
(Preview)
I'm just learning to self focus and boy its tough. Had a relapse today after my AH behaviors were odd. i began obsessing. Ugg...didnt do so well. I prayed and prayed and prayed but I dont feel as if I get relief until I know for sure. Geez....to many broken promises....someone said in another post the...
|
athabascan indian
|
4
|
646
|
|
|
|
Step 6 is posted on the step work board
(Preview)
|
Linistea
|
1
|
552
|
|
|
|
I'm really excited to attend my meeting!!!
(Preview)
I decided this week that I wanted to find one and I did. Unfortunately I cannot go until next Wednesday due to being out of town and night I have my daughter. I am child free next Wednesday and I am counting down the days. I don't know what to expect...I don't even know if I will say anything but reading t...
|
delhommefan
|
2
|
620
|
|
|
|
24 hours later
(Preview)
Today A BF text this morning to ask if I had his glasses and to complain to me about his landlord. I told him I would look for his glasses and ignored the comment about the landlord because I know he wants me to feel sorry for him since I told him he had to leave my house yesterday. We text back and forth a couple...
|
Honeypie
|
9
|
1055
|
|
|
|
I've realized my co-dependency, probably should NOT have told him!
(Preview)
So, after months and months of continuously losing myself, fighting depression, anger, sadness, etc., because of my agony and obsession for my boyfriend's addiction, I finally see the light. I picked up a book for myself (two days ago) called Codependent No More, and was ABSOLUTELY blown away at...
|
faith84
|
9
|
700
|
|
|
|
How Is it???
(Preview)
I was Just Sitting Here thinking... Trying to Pin Point what "Triggers" me on a Daily Basis, wihle in my day, sometimes they are Triggers of Growth, "Ah Moments" I have Triggers of Guilt "Daily", triggers of "Intimacy" Or Lack there of... Growth, I Can be...
|
Jozie
|
4
|
561
|
|
|
|
Step 1 lightbulb moment today
(Preview)
Hi, I've been thinking alot about step one and journaling alot trying to straighten out my thoughts and ideas. Sometimes when i just let my thoughts come out on the page eventually I will begin to make sense (and some times I don't ) Anyway, I realized today that although I can't say my life is unmanageab...
|
Aimee
|
2
|
804
|
|
|
|
Trusting again.... How do I stop worrying?
(Preview)
I am having a hard time trusting my ABF. I think the moment he is alone he will pick up a drink or visit the dealer. How do I trust him with money when he has been irresponsible and spent his money all on alcohol/ drugs? He has stolen money out of my purse. He had lied to me. He has manipulated me. I've tried to l...
|
suave75
|
8
|
1005
|
|
|
|
Odd contrast
(Preview)
It seems strangely ironic (although completely sensible) that the main focus in Alanon is to put the focus on yourself, while one of the main points in AA is to stop thinking about yourself so much. How would one achieve balance working both programs? Anyone got suggestions?
|
pinkchip
|
7
|
704
|
|
|
|
New to this
(Preview)
Hello All, I am new to this type of group. Unfortunately I'm not new to living with an alcoholic. My husband and I have been together for 7 years with two small boys. I husband is a good man with a very caring heart. He does not drink all the time and due to this it was difficult for me to convince that he was act...
|
kari419
|
3
|
610
|
|
|
|
DETACHING WITH LOVE!
(Preview)
Hi, My question is how do I detach with love from my 27 yr. old son? My son spent 3 months in rehab. and then I thought he was on his way to changing his life and getting on track to be a stable and sober individual. So I allowed him to live with me and my husband for 7 1/2 months until I couldn't take i...
|
roxygirl
|
4
|
1122
|
|
|
|
Please help me understand
(Preview)
My boyfriend of 2 years is an alcoholic. He was in recovery when I first met him but has been slowing sliding backward drinking first 1 quart of beer after work then 2 then 3. He has had many problems in his life created by drinking. He lost his job at the end of October and has not been able to find work. I hav...
|
Honeypie
|
6
|
810
|
|
|
|
a question about amends
(Preview)
Hello, I was married for 11 years to an abusive volitile addict. A few years ago, I divorced him. During the relationship he sexually assaulted me on more than one occasion. He currently works for a prominant treatment facility as an addictions counselor. Though I am within my rights to prosecute hi...
|
arinna599
|
16
|
1296
|
|
|
|
Nervous
(Preview)
My exah gets out of prison today. The last couple years has been a breeze of concentrating on myself and my program. I am trying not to project. I am having a hard time trying to either not feel or accept feeling this dread that I am about to be tested in so many different ways. Any tool suggestions and ESH...
|
Jennifer
|
4
|
657
|
|
|
|
what do you feel glad about today?
(Preview)
Even though I'm frightened about challenges in grad school, I'm grateful I have the chance to do interesting projects that I care about. I am also grateful for those in my life (I am lucky to have a loving and supportive partner, friends, family and faculty advisers) who will accept and support me even...
|
Imogen421
|
6
|
730
|
|
|
|
I'am Back
(Preview)
It has started again. My A has been so good that I knew that something was about to happen or explode. He has not had a drink in one month and I told him how proud of him I was and that he can beat this with some help. To make a long story short, he started to drink again every night just a little but now it is bac...
|
weggie
|
4
|
600
|
|
|
|
I've lost all my marbles
(Preview)
Well on my journey... could not even walk this morn. Like my friend told me, u have used up all the beans in your jar, I said no, i lost all my marbles. She had to come get me, rush me to doc. I had no strength to fight it. Plus I am sick and WANT to get better. doc was great. friend went in with me. All the stuff you a...
|
Debilyn
|
9
|
712
|
|
|
|
Set the boundary
(Preview)
After much thought about the situation, I let my A know that I will no longer live with an A that is not in active recovery. Even though he is physically sober, he is mentally not. I let him know it is not in my best interest to live with the progressive insanity that has seeped into our lives and either the i...
|
clep
|
5
|
595
|
|
|
|
I said the stupidest thing
(Preview)
Last night AH and I were talking about how I felt about his renewed interest in drinking after 15 years of being sober. As I expressed my position, he grew concerned for me, not for himself and he said he'd get rid of all the alcohol in the house. Now, here was my response: NO, don't do that for me. I don't...
|
ilovedogs
|
8
|
764
|
|
|
|
QUESTION?
(Preview)
Hi, What are the Al-anon meetings all about? I know in AA you talk about keeping sober and practice a program for sobriety. So what do you learn in Al-anon meetings? Thank you, Roxygirl
|
roxygirl
|
4
|
553
|
|
|
|
To All The Ladies Of MIP
(Preview)
I want to wish all of you a "Happy Valentine's Day". Enjoy your day ladies. Take care of yourself first..........And most important........ Do something special just for "YOU" today !!!!!!!! Here's A Big "Valentine's Day" HUG, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Monda...
|
RLC
|
10
|
984
|
|
|
|
Hi, newbie here
(Preview)
Morning everyone. Just want to pop in for some support as my partner is an alcoholic. :( Anyway. I'll tell you a bit about us. I am in my late 20's and him in his late 30's. I live with my parents and he live with his. It's been like that since we met 5 years ago (his boozing wasn't obvious or so bad back then). I...
|
Lizzie Hay
|
5
|
566
|
|
|
|
Am I The Crazy One???
(Preview)
Ok maybe I shouldn't use the word crazy to refer to my mom but I am.... Over the weekend my parents very graciously invited my daughter and I to spend the weekend with them at the beach. It was a fun trip and my daughter had a GREAT time...she absolutely adores her grandparents. But the trip was rather de...
|
delhommefan
|
4
|
715
|
|
|
|
I am addicted to his addiction
(Preview)
I just can't seem to stop. I think about him and his habit constantly. I have read every book I can find on addiction and different effects from different drugs. I am constantly online reading sites on drug abuse, forums and stories. I know and understand that I cannot help him if he does not want to help h...
|
faith84
|
7
|
1275
|
|
|
|
React or not, and how?
(Preview)
Hi there,Things have been going well in my relationship with Alcoholic fiance. He has been making an effort to be sober. And also being very supportive of me with recent health issue I've been frightened about. Tomorrow we are supposed to go away for a night at a hotel for Valentine's day.Now, he has ju...
|
Imogen421
|
3
|
648
|
|
|
|
AH wants to stop
(Preview)
I am new to this website and forum. My husband did not drink THAT much when we met...I would have called it socially, but then again, I was young (still am), naive (perhaps still am as well) and probably too in love to notice. After we had a baby almost a year and a half ago, his drinking increased and incr...
|
jadebangle09
|
7
|
646
|
|
|
|
What does unmanageable mean to you?
(Preview)
Hi, I'm very new to all of this so please be gentle with me . I am just starting to learn about recovery and exploring step one. I agree 100% that I am powerless over alcohol, but I really wouldn't say that my life is "unmanageable". Sure, I have ups and downs just like everyone else, but I have to...
|
Aimee
|
6
|
2975
|
|
|
|
Please need help
(Preview)
I do not know where to start... I have entered in a relationship with a sober alcoholic (8years sober). After almost three years living together, I have ended it, 4 days ago. .....The first 4 months was a fairytail...Now, I feel so empty and just like my life was sucked out of me. I have never lived wi...
|
brook2
|
3
|
681
|
|
|
|
Why am I so angry?
(Preview)
I keep telling myself: I can't control this. I can't control him. I didn't cause this. You all know the drill but none of it is giving me any comfort. I am so d*mn angry; at him, at my dad, at society(for whatever reason, I don't even know right now, LOL), and even at myself because it was my decision to s...
|
ilovedogs
|
9
|
868
|
|