Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

neshema2 · neshema2

I was sitting here, reflecting on the posts and answers to my threads and You all are not going to believe this one...Talk about not feeling worth it I went AWOL on my recovery b/c of 2 things... #1...I got sick of recovery work and wanted to do something ELSE for a change..It felt like a "sentence&q...

neshema2 · neshema2

I have my days where I just CANT focus, can't stay in the now, can't concentrate, mind going faster then my fingers, etc. it shows in my typing when I reverse letters terribly it shows when I do something and mess up and its b/c I am NOT thinking, not paying attention, not in the now, not "present&quo...

eekamouse · eekamouse

Hi, I'm new to all of this and have just located a local meeting that I will be going to on Sunday. I have been dating a guy, in a long distance relationship (200 miles), for a year and a half now. It took awhile because of the infrequency of our seeing each other for me to realize that he is an alcoholic. We h...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

My wife got an Operating While Intoxicated charge a couple months ago. Today I took a day off work to drive her to the counselors office for an evaluation for the court, shopping while we waited for the court, attorney appointment, hearing, and initial probation meeting. She was told multiple time...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I spent years stuck in an angry place focusing on therapy, meds, and trying to dissect myself and others, figuring out why they did what they did to me when really ill never know why and there's good reason for that...I don't need to know. i found my Solution in literature in another fellowship and I thin...

Aloha · Aloha

I had an opportunity this morning to listen, with complete detachment, to the chaos alcoholism creates in families. I was in my bathroom getting ready to go to work when I heard my neighbor's car door slam, and a guy shout "F**K!!!!" at the top of his lungs. It alarmed me at first. I heard pani...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54211866/alanon-step-7/

Venera · Venera

Can somebody advice on what should a wife do when the AH was drinking for a few days, missed work, household responsibilities, wasted a lot of money. Do we ignore it, do we talk about it, do we act mad or happy. I feel very angry now, but not sure what would be the right approach. Should i just ignore what hap...

newgirl17 · newgirl17

My husband sent me some very ugly texts I didn't respond to any of them. Then he sent me one that said for me to get the 'xxxx' out of his life. So I packed an overnight bag and went to my friends house. Idk what is going on with him but for tonight I don't have to take that treatment from him. I think he is drinkin...

el-cee · el-cee

This forum is such a great tool in recovery but just lately I have become frustrated reading about the pain of living with alcoholism. It has become a bit much reading the same kind of issues over and over. It never ends. If I'm honest I think it's more to do with my own issues with my son. I'm not feeling ve...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everybody: It's been a while since a post, although I have been coming here and learning a ton from all of you, as always. It seems that if I feel a bit unmoored, or down all I have to do is read a bit on these boards and I recognize myself and feelings immediately, it is empowering for sure. It's been abou...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Sometimes I feel like I am stuck & can't move on w/ my life. Something has to change. Because if nothing changes, nothing changes. I want to move forward today. I can get so stuck in the past it kills me. But, today I am not going to share any past experiences because I talked to my sober alcoholic &...

LeenieBeanie · LeenieBeanie

That is what my 8 year old grandson said to me last week as we were packing him up to spend the summer with his father in Georgia. I almost forgot to pack his Legos. He then went on to say that he would miss me, and I am to remember that he has a birthday coming up in July. I said I would not forget. We were doubl...

Pushka · Pushka

I just want to put out here for those trying to remember that the A in their life is not ok and that yes it is their thinking, keeping the focus on me is where it is at. Last night was visitation with the kids .. first off my daughter gets a text later after court, apparently STBAX must have gone into work and h...

Bettina · Bettina

Chuang Tse, a Chinese Philosopher once dreamt he was a Butterfly. On waking he said to himself "Now , am I a man dreaming that I am a Butterfly, or am I a Butterfly that thinks "I am Chuang"? This message is very profound and could have lots of different meanings, What is your interpret...

Lyne · Lyne

I feel very uplifted today because as nervous as I felt, and briefly got lost on the way to the meeting (and I knew exactly where it was), and with how anxious I felt for about the first half hour, I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF! I shared, I kept an open mind, I heard those words at the end when the chair was reading so...

neshema2 · neshema2

I have 2 A brothers...named "R" and "P" "R" is a sweetheart...drinker, pretty bad, but at least he can get out of himself and care about another...when not drinking he is a good support , good friend, we laugh a lot and for the most part, he is a "keeper"......

tortuga · tortuga

Hello MIP family, I was wondering and would like to hear from those of you who have more experience. I am about to leave for a 10-days meditation course (Vipassana). It is a retreat which purpose is to look within and learn to be in the moment, accept what is, experiencing truth and peace of mind. Theref...

silent · silent

hi,its me again chinup,silent 2 nics ive used in the past been a way long time since ive been here,well im needing esh on getting married to my a which he has quit drinking 5 mths ago and is doing great we get along fine,but im not thinking im thinking with a full deck of cards right now,im just sooo tired of u...

Pushka · Pushka

Well .. LOL .. I wish that things could have been resolved .. I swear I'm in and out of court so much someone is going to think I'm an atty. You know it's bad when you are stopped and asked where something is .. I really look way to comfortable in the hallways. So bad news first .. I couldn't believe that my ST...

tiredof_it · tiredof_it

Do you ever get the feeling of just being tired of yourself? Like how come we (as wives/girlfriends) can't just 'allow' our drinking s/o to just go out and do his thing? We have a lot of children in the house and clearly a couple of years ago, after almost 20 years of marriage I had had it. My entire family...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am overwhelmed but in a good way! I have to admit that some days have been stressful but if I live in the now, I can recover from the bad days & not keep mentioning what happened yesterday. Yesterday is gone. I am so happy that today can be the best day of my life if I look from the right perspective. I jus...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'm just trying to not give in to disappointment these days but it isn't easy. My workplace is going through a huge overhaul. The mission is getting lost in this transition and only jobs that generate revenue for this non profit are now plentiful. Many of us didn't sign on for this. After losing my mothe...

grateful2be · grateful2be

As I posted this month, my son was released from prison recently. I would not let him stay here, haven't given him money, rides, clothes, cleaning supplies, food - nothing that I did before with him. He's attending classes, looking for work, and is tethered as parole requirements dictate and curr...

Clou · Clou

Hi everyone. I am fairly new to Alanon. I started in January. The F2F group I attend is wonderful. There are a several people in my group just like me, new to Alanon. The group is small. Therein lies the problem. Several of us in the group have all said that we need a sponsor to work the steps. It is...

newgirl17 · newgirl17

I have been at home contemplating all that has been going on. And I finally reached out to an alanon friend from the meeting. I felt like I was going crazy. He came home for lunch and acted like nothing had happened and so did I. Then I thought to myself why did I engage in his crazy fight? I'm learning that hi...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

I came across this article today at work. It is written for a business audience, but it struck me how much of this is right in line with all that I've learned (and keep learning) here and in my Al-anon meetings. A link to the article is at the end. Enjoy! 1. You can do anything, but you can't do everything. Li...

debhud · debhud

my daughter is home from college. she called me last night hysterical. her alcoholic brother came to her house (drunk of course) and physically assaulted her. apparently the neighbors heard the assault and called the police. daughter did not press charges. she is a mess. upset because she alw...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I remember reading in a book about alcoholism that whether you do everything the alcoholic wants, or you don't, it is not going to make them treat you any better so you might as well take care of you. Of course in the beginning of my recovery I did not believe that, as my alcoholic had me riddled with anxiet...

el-cee · el-cee

My son is still homeless, he has made no effort to get accomodation because he has a court case pending. He is so miserable looking. He came in tonight, asked for money and became angry when I said no. He says I have pushed him away and i will regret it. He says the people he is staying with thinks I am a bad mot...

luv123 · luv123

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/electronic-meetingsUsingI am ok considering the stress of being up close around the disease for a while. Actuall...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I am very seriously thinking that I am getting depressed, not something that normally happens to me. I feel like life just keeps throwing me challenge after challenge and I am sooo not ready for them. I've had setbacks with my son's educational needs, thinking of holding him back to repeat 8th grade...

newgirl17 · newgirl17

My husband came home tonight and told me that his mom said it was ok to throw me out of the house. The house we live in is my mother in laws old house that she usually rents out. That it was time for me to leave. That he was giving me the gift of freedom from him. That he loved me but he wasn't in love with me amymore...

Venera · Venera

Hello! This is my first post, i hope somebody can respond. Have been married for 9 years, have two girls, and expecting a boy. AH has been drinking since the beginning, which i didn't notice but with the time it started to get worse and worse. He used to just drink on the weekends, but always go to work. It e...

samc · samc

Hello everyone! I've been in the program for almost a year now, and have not had a lot of luck with finding a sponsor. I've built a nice group of people I can call in program to chat with - which is great!- but everyone I've asked to actually be my sponsor has been too busy, or had too many sponsees, or not be...

Path to Serenity · Path to Serenity

My daughter went to court today on the TRO request against the insane (Ex) BF. He got a lawyer and decided to fight it - why I don't know. Anyway, my son went as a witness and the Judge interviewed everyone in private and decided in favor of a TRO for a full year. The BF started complaining that he still...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I generally don't communicate with the exAH much at all since I have the kids the majority of the time and trade when they get a week off here and there, for Summer I try to share them 2 weeks on and off. So I emailed him and tried to get an idea of what dates could work for him. I did not wait too long, but never ha...

scaredandconfused · scaredandconfused

I had completely given up on my marriage to my AH. I decided I wasn't going to put my life on hold any longer hoping that the man I used to love would return. I filed for divorce 2 months ago and thought that there was no way I would allow him back into my life. The past 3 weeks it seemed like he was finally getti...

Bettina · Bettina

"Reality is harsh, It can be cruel and ugly. Yet, no matter how much we grieve, it won't change our circumstances. What is important is to not be defeated, forge ahead bravely. If we do this, a path will open up before us." Ikeda

Overcome · Overcome

Ok, I'm going to warn everyone right off the bat that this is going to be a "venting" post. I was raised in the church, attended faithfully for years. I've been a Sunday School teacher, sat on committees, even chaired some. I've been involved with the politics of the church, sitting in as &qu...

Bettina · Bettina

"One of the greatest obstacles to the joy of loving is our desire for control. To master the art of loving is to overcome this selfish desire." Shin Yatomi

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am discovering that days are going well--I am still happy about my new eyes, & I can still walk even though I have arthritis. I have a darn good roof over my head! I am at peace most of the time. My HP is so good to me that I can truly see where my gratitude comes from. He is the way of peace & serenity. I...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Long time no post :D. I have been lurking around the board and popped into the chat room a couple times. So I figured maybe it was time to say hello and also introduce myself to the new people and wave hello to my old friends. For those of you who don't know me I got my first taste of alanon here at MIP. My first m...

Rinn · Rinn

I am really struggling with the loss of my husband. In a way it feels like he died. He has been using meth for almost 7 months. We are separated. He hasn't been living here for a long time. He says now he has a few days sober but I don't think so. HE has changed so much, he drinks all the time. He is leaner, h...

sirchef · sirchef

Its been quite some time since I've been here. I have been working at a new job and it takes most of my energy and time. I miss coming here for meetings and a sense of belonging to a family. My life is the usual train wreck we all seem to share in one way or another. I had learned so much from all of you here but as I...

Pushka · Pushka

There is a lot of not good stuff happening, however there is a LOT of positive things going on as well. I am grateful for this group and sooo many other things that have happened. Back to working thank goodness .. was starting to get a little worried about some things. I have exactly what I need at the m...

Gaby · Gaby

Even though I had a great visit with my son and church service on Sunday was great.. and recalling what my son said "mom go be happy" I still have fear. I am trying real hard to work my program and pray to my HP.. Why am I having set backs ???!!! Just so confused and emotional..

abbyal · abbyal

Hi everyone abbyal here . I am hoping some of you from this site are attending our convention in a few weeks . I would love to meet you f2f if possible . I only know one thing for sure I will be volunteering in the Hospitality Room on Thurs the 4th from 1pm to 4 pm . My name tag will be Louise G. hope we can meet...

John · John

Hi everyone! Yes, I am here, and yes I have been reading so many of your post and replies. I pull a few pieces from this board every day and try to use them as a point of focus for myself as I go about my day. However, I must admit that I start feeling very overwhelmed by it all sometimes and so helpless to rea...

chamoisdog · chamoisdog

This is my first post to your message board and I will try to make this short! I have been with/married to my AH since 2006. We are truly blessed with 5 amazing children-my 3 and his 2, who I love and adore like they are my own. Being my 3rd marriage and his 2nd I was in it to win it w/ divorce not being an option. I...

crazycatlady · crazycatlady

Hi all- I love this board and I lurk a lot, but I don't seem to post unless I'm in crisis. And I'm in crisis now. But because of my active f2f Al-anon work, I am more peaceful and rational this time. I'd still like your input, however. My AH drank again last night after 6 months of hard working sobriety. We ha...

flinn66 · flinn66

I had a rough day yesterday, my fault really because I answered the phone to my ex A, just not really thinking! Anyway wont bother to relate the detail, but the usual whinging self pity and how if we could just get back together everything would be so great, how everybody abandons him etc, etc, ah and of c...

newgirl17 · newgirl17

Lately I have been able to detach in peace but tonight my husband came home with a hickey on his chest. I was so hurt snd disgusted at the same time. I went to restroom to cry and talk things out with HP. I came out and ignored him.I budgeted to see if it was possible for me to move but everytime I did the numbers...

Lyne · Lyne

Tomorrow night I am going to my first F2F meeting. I am as excited as if I was going to my favorite music or play or anything magical and wonderful. I've been coming on and off to this board for many months, but now I am more serious. Help from one of you folks made me realize I need the live, human being he...

ToocaringNY · ToocaringNY

I am new to this forum and I love it! As a non-dinker and never-drinker, I would love to know what it actually feels like when a 50 year old woman wakes up after a quiet night but one with the consumption of three glasses of wine. I do not want to ask her but would love to know.

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

My AM came home tonight and started drinking. Her and my dad got into it although I only heard the last of what he said to her which was that she is a zombie (in how she looks, acts etc) and he told me he has a wife who's an A and I have a mother of who's an A. She went to bed without a word. I tried to calm down my dad te...

Jerry F · Jerry F

My wife's first leg flight back to her family showed up 2 hours late so after I dropped her at the airport with fond wishes for a safe flight and happiness that she would be at the 1st birthday party for our youngest grand child, a girl, Olivia...I get a call that she called she had missed her flight. She...

ToocaringNY · ToocaringNY

I am in the non-drinker category. Never have been a drinker and I am a 46 year old female. My question is this: Why does it seem drinkers are so much happier than me? Is it true that they are or is just an illusion? There is more to this and I will share as a responses come in. Thank you.

Gaby · Gaby

We got there right at 1 pm. I seen my son pulling up behind us in a white truck with a huge smile. I smiled back, his little sister ran up and hugged him and then he can up and hugged me and his step dad. He introduced us to others and their families. He said let's go to our church which is in the same area as where h...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

So, currently I'm living with my parents, helping them with errands (they cannot drive and people drive a lot where I live), left my job to focus on my children's mental and physical health, my niece ....moved in with us (she is almost 8 months pregnant and husband works in the oil fields.....her firs...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	DUMBEST confession, but its the truth (Preview) I was sitting here, reflecting on the posts and answers to my threads and You all are not going to believe this one...Talk about not feeling worth it I went AWOL on my recovery b/c of 2 things... #1...I got sick of recovery work and wanted to do something ELSE for a change..It felt like a "sentence&q...	neshema2	5	277	Jun 30, 2013 by DavidG
	Is it me?? Or do some of you do this???? (Preview) I have my days where I just CANT focus, can't stay in the now, can't concentrate, mind going faster then my fingers, etc. it shows in my typing when I reverse letters terribly it shows when I do something and mess up and its b/c I am NOT thinking, not paying attention, not in the now, not "present&quo...	neshema2	18	640	Jun 30, 2013 by neshema2
	I'm new to all of this. About to go to my first meeting but have a question. (Preview) Hi, I'm new to all of this and have just located a local meeting that I will be going to on Sunday. I have been dating a guy, in a long distance relationship (200 miles), for a year and a half now. It took awhile because of the infrequency of our seeing each other for me to realize that he is an alcoholic. We h...	eekamouse	13	266	Jun 29, 2013 by KennyFenderjazz
	Sorry- need to vent in a big way (Preview) My wife got an Operating While Intoxicated charge a couple months ago. Today I took a day off work to drive her to the counselors office for an evaluation for the court, shopping while we waited for the court, attorney appointment, hearing, and initial probation meeting. She was told multiple time...	KennyFenderjazz	8	534	Jun 29, 2013 by KennyFenderjazz
	Psychology vs Spirituality (Preview) I spent years stuck in an angry place focusing on therapy, meds, and trying to dissect myself and others, figuring out why they did what they did to me when really ill never know why and there's good reason for that...I don't need to know. i found my Solution in literature in another fellowship and I thin...	WorkingThroughIt	4	177	Jun 29, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	Alcoholism strikes again (Preview) I had an opportunity this morning to listen, with complete detachment, to the chaos alcoholism creates in families. I was in my bathroom getting ready to go to work when I heard my neighbor's car door slam, and a guy shout "F**K!!!!" at the top of his lungs. It alarmed me at first. I heard pani...	Aloha	3	291	Jun 29, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	STEP 7 (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54211866/alanon-step-7/	hotrod	0	660	Jun 29, 2013 by hotrod
	What is a right thing to do after AH stops drinking 5 days (Preview) Can somebody advice on what should a wife do when the AH was drinking for a few days, missed work, household responsibilities, wasted a lot of money. Do we ignore it, do we talk about it, do we act mad or happy. I feel very angry now, but not sure what would be the right approach. Should i just ignore what hap...	Venera	14	530	Jun 29, 2013 by grateful2be
	taking care of me tonight... (Preview) My husband sent me some very ugly texts I didn't respond to any of them. Then he sent me one that said for me to get the 'xxxx' out of his life. So I packed an overnight bag and went to my friends house. Idk what is going on with him but for tonight I don't have to take that treatment from him. I think he is drinkin...	newgirl17	10	377	Jun 29, 2013 by neshema2
	not very alanon (Preview) This forum is such a great tool in recovery but just lately I have become frustrated reading about the pain of living with alcoholism. It has become a bit much reading the same kind of issues over and over. It never ends. If I'm honest I think it's more to do with my own issues with my son. I'm not feeling ve...	el-cee	4	283	Jun 29, 2013 by grateful2be
	update (Preview) Hi Everybody: It's been a while since a post, although I have been coming here and learning a ton from all of you, as always. It seems that if I feel a bit unmoored, or down all I have to do is read a bit on these boards and I recognize myself and feelings immediately, it is empowering for sure. It's been abou...	yanksfan51	7	248	Jun 29, 2013 by Lyne
	moving on takes work! (Preview) Sometimes I feel like I am stuck & can't move on w/ my life. Something has to change. Because if nothing changes, nothing changes. I want to move forward today. I can get so stuck in the past it kills me. But, today I am not going to share any past experiences because I talked to my sober alcoholic &...	Hoot Nanny	4	343	Jun 29, 2013 by Lyne
	Worst. Nana. Ever!! (Preview) That is what my 8 year old grandson said to me last week as we were packing him up to spend the summer with his father in Georgia. I almost forgot to pack his Legos. He then went on to say that he would miss me, and I am to remember that he has a birthday coming up in July. I said I would not forget. We were doubl...	LeenieBeanie	2	429	Jun 29, 2013 by neshema2
	Clarifying how unwell the thinking is .. (Preview) I just want to put out here for those trying to remember that the A in their life is not ok and that yes it is their thinking, keeping the focus on me is where it is at. Last night was visitation with the kids .. first off my daughter gets a text later after court, apparently STBAX must have gone into work and h...	Pushka	5	370	Jun 28, 2013 by canadianguy
	"Are we Butterfllies" (Preview) Chuang Tse, a Chinese Philosopher once dreamt he was a Butterfly. On waking he said to himself "Now , am I a man dreaming that I am a Butterfly, or am I a Butterfly that thinks "I am Chuang"? This message is very profound and could have lots of different meanings, What is your interpret...	Bettina	2	220	Jun 28, 2013 by Bettina
	1st F2F meeting was........GREAT! (Preview) I feel very uplifted today because as nervous as I felt, and briefly got lost on the way to the meeting (and I knew exactly where it was), and with how anxious I felt for about the first half hour, I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF! I shared, I kept an open mind, I heard those words at the end when the chair was reading so...	Lyne	8	283	Jun 28, 2013 by MeTwo2
	What A's do I Keep What A's do I dump (Preview) I have 2 A brothers...named "R" and "P" "R" is a sweetheart...drinker, pretty bad, but at least he can get out of himself and care about another...when not drinking he is a good support , good friend, we laugh a lot and for the most part, he is a "keeper"......	neshema2	2	384	Jun 28, 2013 by tiredtonite
	meditation for peace of mind (Preview) Hello MIP family, I was wondering and would like to hear from those of you who have more experience. I am about to leave for a 10-days meditation course (Vipassana). It is a retreat which purpose is to look within and learn to be in the moment, accept what is, experiencing truth and peace of mind. Theref...	tortuga	9	1297	Jun 28, 2013 by grateful2be
	im back,and need esh please (Preview) hi,its me again chinup,silent 2 nics ive used in the past been a way long time since ive been here,well im needing esh on getting married to my a which he has quit drinking 5 mths ago and is doing great we get along fine,but im not thinking im thinking with a full deck of cards right now,im just sooo tired of u...	silent	11	429	Jun 28, 2013 by Debilyn
	Court UpDate :) (Preview) Well .. LOL .. I wish that things could have been resolved .. I swear I'm in and out of court so much someone is going to think I'm an atty. You know it's bad when you are stopped and asked where something is .. I really look way to comfortable in the hallways. So bad news first .. I couldn't believe that my ST...	Pushka	4	422	Jun 28, 2013 by Debilyn
	Tired of my own self! (Preview) Do you ever get the feeling of just being tired of yourself? Like how come we (as wives/girlfriends) can't just 'allow' our drinking s/o to just go out and do his thing? We have a lot of children in the house and clearly a couple of years ago, after almost 20 years of marriage I had had it. My entire family...	tiredof_it	15	467	Jun 28, 2013 by Debilyn
	overwhelmed! (Preview) I am overwhelmed but in a good way! I have to admit that some days have been stressful but if I live in the now, I can recover from the bad days & not keep mentioning what happened yesterday. Yesterday is gone. I am so happy that today can be the best day of my life if I look from the right perspective. I jus...	Hoot Nanny	2	205	Jun 28, 2013 by grateful2be
	Discouraged (Preview) I'm just trying to not give in to disappointment these days but it isn't easy. My workplace is going through a huge overhaul. The mission is getting lost in this transition and only jobs that generate revenue for this non profit are now plentiful. Many of us didn't sign on for this. After losing my mothe...	tiredtonite	5	424	Jun 28, 2013 by tiredtonite
	My son (Preview) As I posted this month, my son was released from prison recently. I would not let him stay here, haven't given him money, rides, clothes, cleaning supplies, food - nothing that I did before with him. He's attending classes, looking for work, and is tethered as parole requirements dictate and curr...	grateful2be	6	401	Jun 27, 2013 by Lyne
	Finding a sponsor (Preview) Hi everyone. I am fairly new to Alanon. I started in January. The F2F group I attend is wonderful. There are a several people in my group just like me, new to Alanon. The group is small. Therein lies the problem. Several of us in the group have all said that we need a sponsor to work the steps. It is...	Clou	3	876	Jun 27, 2013 by neshema2
	texting alanon friend helped... (Preview) I have been at home contemplating all that has been going on. And I finally reached out to an alanon friend from the meeting. I felt like I was going crazy. He came home for lunch and acted like nothing had happened and so did I. Then I thought to myself why did I engage in his crazy fight? I'm learning that hi...	newgirl17	6	345	Jun 27, 2013 by yanksfan51
	10 Things I learned at Work Today (Preview) I came across this article today at work. It is written for a business audience, but it struck me how much of this is right in line with all that I've learned (and keep learning) here and in my Al-anon meetings. A link to the article is at the end. Enjoy! 1. You can do anything, but you can't do everything. Li...	ParisMemories	3	522	Jun 27, 2013 by neshema2
	my AS physically assaulted my daughter (Preview) my daughter is home from college. she called me last night hysterical. her alcoholic brother came to her house (drunk of course) and physically assaulted her. apparently the neighbors heard the assault and called the police. daughter did not press charges. she is a mess. upset because she alw...	debhud	6	465	Jun 26, 2013 by bud
	detachment causing the alcoholic to get angry (Preview) I remember reading in a book about alcoholism that whether you do everything the alcoholic wants, or you don't, it is not going to make them treat you any better so you might as well take care of you. Of course in the beginning of my recovery I did not believe that, as my alcoholic had me riddled with anxiet...	giraffe13	4	610	Jun 26, 2013 by bud
	This feels wrong. (Preview) My son is still homeless, he has made no effort to get accomodation because he has a court case pending. He is so miserable looking. He came in tonight, asked for money and became angry when I said no. He says I have pushed him away and i will regret it. He says the people he is staying with thinks I am a bad mot...	el-cee	15	596	Jun 26, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Keeping perspective & trusting God (Preview) http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/electronic-meetingsUsingI am ok considering the stress of being up close around the disease for a while. Actuall...	luv123	1	452	Jun 26, 2013 by Jill
	What do you do when you're discouraged? (Preview) I am very seriously thinking that I am getting depressed, not something that normally happens to me. I feel like life just keeps throwing me challenge after challenge and I am sooo not ready for them. I've had setbacks with my son's educational needs, thinking of holding him back to repeat 8th grade...	ilovedogs	13	474	Jun 26, 2013 by ilovedogs
	frustrated and very sad (Preview) My husband came home tonight and told me that his mom said it was ok to throw me out of the house. The house we live in is my mother in laws old house that she usually rents out. That it was time for me to leave. That he was giving me the gift of freedom from him. That he loved me but he wasn't in love with me amymore...	newgirl17	7	349	Jun 26, 2013 by hotrod
	Have two kids, pregnant with the 3rd, argued with AH and he left the house (Preview) Hello! This is my first post, i hope somebody can respond. Have been married for 9 years, have two girls, and expecting a boy. AH has been drinking since the beginning, which i didn't notice but with the time it started to get worse and worse. He used to just drink on the weekends, but always go to work. It e...	Venera	8	245	Jun 26, 2013 by hotrod
	Looking for an e-mail/chat sponsor (Preview) Hello everyone! I've been in the program for almost a year now, and have not had a lot of luck with finding a sponsor. I've built a nice group of people I can call in program to chat with - which is great!- but everyone I've asked to actually be my sponsor has been too busy, or had too many sponsees, or not be...	samc	1	353	Jun 26, 2013 by luv123
	TRO granted (Preview) My daughter went to court today on the TRO request against the insane (Ex) BF. He got a lawyer and decided to fight it - why I don't know. Anyway, my son went as a witness and the Judge interviewed everyone in private and decided in favor of a TRO for a full year. The BF started complaining that he still...	Path to Serenity	10	378	Jun 26, 2013 by pinkchip
	So frustrated tonight with the exAH (Preview) I generally don't communicate with the exAH much at all since I have the kids the majority of the time and trade when they get a week off here and there, for Summer I try to share them 2 weeks on and off. So I emailed him and tried to get an idea of what dates could work for him. I did not wait too long, but never ha...	Breakingfree	4	251	Jun 26, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Feeling like such a fool right now (Preview) I had completely given up on my marriage to my AH. I decided I wasn't going to put my life on hold any longer hoping that the man I used to love would return. I filed for divorce 2 months ago and thought that there was no way I would allow him back into my life. The past 3 weeks it seemed like he was finally getti...	scaredandconfused	10	492	Jun 26, 2013 by Bettina
	Reality is Harsh!!!! (Preview) "Reality is harsh, It can be cruel and ugly. Yet, no matter how much we grieve, it won't change our circumstances. What is important is to not be defeated, forge ahead bravely. If we do this, a path will open up before us." Ikeda	Bettina	2	313	Jun 26, 2013 by Jerry F
	God/Church Issues (Preview) Ok, I'm going to warn everyone right off the bat that this is going to be a "venting" post. I was raised in the church, attended faithfully for years. I've been a Sunday School teacher, sat on committees, even chaired some. I've been involved with the politics of the church, sitting in as &qu...	Overcome	6	274	Jun 26, 2013 by grateful2be
	Thoughts!! (Preview) "One of the greatest obstacles to the joy of loving is our desire for control. To master the art of loving is to overcome this selfish desire." Shin Yatomi	Bettina	2	163	Jun 26, 2013 by Bettina
	anothe day, more gratitude! (Preview) I am discovering that days are going well--I am still happy about my new eyes, & I can still walk even though I have arthritis. I have a darn good roof over my head! I am at peace most of the time. My HP is so good to me that I can truly see where my gratitude comes from. He is the way of peace & serenity. I...	Hoot Nanny	0	176	Jun 25, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	Saying hello (Preview) Long time no post :D. I have been lurking around the board and popped into the chat room a couple times. So I figured maybe it was time to say hello and also introduce myself to the new people and wave hello to my old friends. For those of you who don't know me I got my first taste of alanon here at MIP. My first m...	Mandy123	3	405	Jun 26, 2013 by hotrod
	stuggling with sense of loss (Preview) I am really struggling with the loss of my husband. In a way it feels like he died. He has been using meth for almost 7 months. We are separated. He hasn't been living here for a long time. He says now he has a few days sober but I don't think so. HE has changed so much, he drinks all the time. He is leaner, h...	Rinn	6	233	Jun 26, 2013 by Debilyn
	Hello family (Preview) Its been quite some time since I've been here. I have been working at a new job and it takes most of my energy and time. I miss coming here for meetings and a sense of belonging to a family. My life is the usual train wreck we all seem to share in one way or another. I had learned so much from all of you here but as I...	sirchef	4	254	Jun 26, 2013 by wp
	More prayers please :) (Preview) There is a lot of not good stuff happening, however there is a LOT of positive things going on as well. I am grateful for this group and sooo many other things that have happened. Back to working thank goodness .. was starting to get a little worried about some things. I have exactly what I need at the m...	Pushka	7	317	Jun 26, 2013 by Pushka
	Really feeling emotional!!!! (Preview) Even though I had a great visit with my son and church service on Sunday was great.. and recalling what my son said "mom go be happy" I still have fear. I am trying real hard to work my program and pray to my HP.. Why am I having set backs ???!!! Just so confused and emotional..	Gaby	7	236	Jun 25, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	AL-ANON INTERNATIONAL CONVENTION JULY 5-7 th (Preview) Hi everyone abbyal here . I am hoping some of you from this site are attending our convention in a few weeks . I would love to meet you f2f if possible . I only know one thing for sure I will be volunteering in the Hospitality Room on Thurs the 4th from 1pm to 4 pm . My name tag will be Louise G. hope we can meet...	abbyal	5	195	Jun 25, 2013 by Tracy
	Just Overwhelmed... (Preview) Hi everyone! Yes, I am here, and yes I have been reading so many of your post and replies. I pull a few pieces from this board every day and try to use them as a point of focus for myself as I go about my day. However, I must admit that I start feeling very overwhelmed by it all sometimes and so helpless to rea...	John	8	452	Jun 25, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Not in Denial ANYMORE...what next? (Preview) This is my first post to your message board and I will try to make this short! I have been with/married to my AH since 2006. We are truly blessed with 5 amazing children-my 3 and his 2, who I love and adore like they are my own. Being my 3rd marriage and his 2nd I was in it to win it w/ divorce not being an option. I...	chamoisdog	6	350	Jun 25, 2013 by maryjane
	The role of Money in Serenity (Preview) Hi all- I love this board and I lurk a lot, but I don't seem to post unless I'm in crisis. And I'm in crisis now. But because of my active f2f Al-anon work, I am more peaceful and rational this time. I'd still like your input, however. My AH drank again last night after 6 months of hard working sobriety. We ha...	crazycatlady	12	564	Jun 25, 2013 by grateful2be
	How Important is it? (Preview) I had a rough day yesterday, my fault really because I answered the phone to my ex A, just not really thinking! Anyway wont bother to relate the detail, but the usual whinging self pity and how if we could just get back together everything would be so great, how everybody abandons him etc, etc, ah and of c...	flinn66	10	711	Jun 25, 2013 by grateful2be
	detached on the outside...fuming on the inside (Preview) Lately I have been able to detach in peace but tonight my husband came home with a hickey on his chest. I was so hurt snd disgusted at the same time. I went to restroom to cry and talk things out with HP. I came out and ignored him.I budgeted to see if it was possible for me to move but everytime I did the numbers...	newgirl17	4	431	Jun 25, 2013 by grateful2be
	Tomorrow night first F2F (Preview) Tomorrow night I am going to my first F2F meeting. I am as excited as if I was going to my favorite music or play or anything magical and wonderful. I've been coming on and off to this board for many months, but now I am more serious. Help from one of you folks made me realize I need the live, human being he...	Lyne	5	162	Jun 25, 2013 by yanksfan51
	What are the actual physical affects of having three glasses of wine a night for a 50 year old woman? (Preview) I am new to this forum and I love it! As a non-dinker and never-drinker, I would love to know what it actually feels like when a 50 year old woman wakes up after a quiet night but one with the consumption of three glasses of wine. I do not want to ask her but would love to know.	ToocaringNY	7	310	Jun 25, 2013 by Debilyn
	Have had a rough night tonight (Preview) My AM came home tonight and started drinking. Her and my dad got into it although I only heard the last of what he said to her which was that she is a zombie (in how she looks, acts etc) and he told me he has a wife who's an A and I have a mother of who's an A. She went to bed without a word. I tried to calm down my dad te...	phoenixmagicgirl	7	479	Jun 25, 2013 by canadianguy
	Daaang!! (Preview) My wife's first leg flight back to her family showed up 2 hours late so after I dropped her at the airport with fond wishes for a safe flight and happiness that she would be at the 1st birthday party for our youngest grand child, a girl, Olivia...I get a call that she called she had missed her flight. She...	Jerry F	8	270	Jun 25, 2013 by Mandy123
	Happiness within the drinkers group of friends vs. non drinkers. Who is truly happier? (Preview) I am in the non-drinker category. Never have been a drinker and I am a 46 year old female. My question is this: Why does it seem drinkers are so much happier than me? Is it true that they are or is just an illusion? There is more to this and I will share as a responses come in. Thank you.	ToocaringNY	15	754	Jun 24, 2013 by grateful2be
	Update in the visit with my son in rehab.. (Preview) We got there right at 1 pm. I seen my son pulling up behind us in a white truck with a huge smile. I smiled back, his little sister ran up and hugged him and then he can up and hugged me and his step dad. He introduced us to others and their families. He said let's go to our church which is in the same area as where h...	Gaby	13	278	Jun 24, 2013 by Gaby
	Needing space to breathe (Preview) So, currently I'm living with my parents, helping them with errands (they cannot drive and people drive a lot where I live), left my job to focus on my children's mental and physical health, my niece ....moved in with us (she is almost 8 months pregnant and husband works in the oil fields.....her firs...	RoseODAT	6	264	Jun 24, 2013 by RoseODAT
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.