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This train leads to CrazyTown
(Preview)
In some ways it's worse having an A who's a binge drinker. (Of course, there are no good ways for a drinking A to be, so all the ways are "worse.") But what I mean is that I get in a routine of expecting him to be sober, because it's been that way for X many months or years, and then I get more blinds...
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Mattie
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7
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491
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Got new locks
(Preview)
I put new deadbolts on both my doors for safety,I've had to stay here day in day out cause bf took my extra house key and wouldn't give it back to me.so I'm now sitting here waiting for a person to come put my new ones on,what a week this has. been I'm feel drained everyday trying to keep everything together h...
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lookingup
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5
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252
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Who to call?
(Preview)
I would t know who to call if he should showed up,that's a scary thought cause he will show up sooner or later.i don't know what to expect out of him.but I did get my dead bolts on my doors thank goodness that took a load off of me.feeling peaceful
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lookingup
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1
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198
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Resentments
(Preview)
Tonight's topic was on how to let go of resentments which hit home for me, cause I so resent allowing my abf come back into my home only to make things worse and then kicking him out again that I resent I should've never let him back in my house i have a hatred toward him and i hurt also for all that I've allowed...
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lookingup
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4
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274
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Mr. Thomas A`Kempis does it again.
(Preview)
Page of the day; ODAAT; September 3rd....247...."If you cannot make yourself what you would like to be, how can you expect to have another person exactly to your wishes? We want to see others perfect, yet our own faults go unattended. Done...can't say anything better to myself. Working i...
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Jerry F
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4
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413
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The Crazy Relationship Dance
(Preview)
Feeling crazier than ever lately. Emotions are all over the place. I guess I am just a weak, fragile person. Last week AH and I were arguing about the house situation. I made a decision and he didn't like it. Then we were being civil. Then we went out to dinner with our daughter. The next thing I know...he w...
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Newlife girl
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13
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524
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Accidentally Saw My Boyfriend's 4th Step...Don't know what to do
(Preview)
Hello, I am new to Al-Anon, but not new to recovery. I have been in AA for a little over a year and a half. I work a program, go to meetings, have a sponsor, work the steps, etc. I started dating a fellow AA member about 8 months ago. If I didn't qualify for Al-Anon before, then I definitely do now. We've alread...
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lvngsobr
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7
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3092
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hand my will and life over step 3
(Preview)
Hi all, just been to a meeting topic was step three. wow I have been handing my will and life over ad really meaning it of late. I do not want to be insane doing things over and over that I know do not work I have learnt this the hard way. Peace is in Gods will I may not see it today but he can see round corners I rea...
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Tracy
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9
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526
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A funny, but not so funny story about my grandfather
(Preview)
He is actually my step-grandfather. He has started drinking a lot in the past 5 years according to my mom. She tells me about crazy stuff he does. He is 92 years old and just had his birthday. I am not as close to him as my cousin is. So my cousin lives 9 hrs away from us. She called my grandfather on his birthda...
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Newlife girl
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1
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234
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There's not a card for that
(Preview)
There's not an anniversary card that says "I'm only still with you as I can't trust you not to harm the kids on visitation". Was our anniversary today, surprised at my emotions - we haven't been more than co parents for months now and thought I had come to terms with it but found myself so overw...
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Kerrymom
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4
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435
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trying to make better choices
(Preview)
Its been another week with the abf. He has been sober for 5 days now and decided he is going to go for a beer at the local pub but not get drunk. What insane lies. I decided I would not be near him while he is drinking. I came back to my apartment. On Saturday, I went camping without him as he did not want to be arou...
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joker
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5
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440
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Hi MIP family!
(Preview)
It has been a long while since I have posted here. I hope you are well and working your own recoveries. There are big changes underway on my end. My AH, who spent a year working out of state, returned home for good in early July, and has been working locally. His drinking and behavior is spiraling, and...
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stephaniej
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3
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333
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Not currently dealing with A
(Preview)
I posted last night a brief introduction about myself... As I'm reading other posts, I see that many people here are currently dealing with the A in their daily lives. That is not the case for me... So I was curious, who else out there is working the program but is not currently dealing with the A? Who is ex...
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jessbuddy0014
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2
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278
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my "happy face side"
(Preview)
I loved jillybean's post, so I thought I'd use it as a spring board. Well, I have begun working on step 4. I took a piece of paper and divided it in halves. On one side I put a smiley face and on the other side I put a frowny face. On my happy face side, I began listing all the characteristics that I like about m...
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cloudyskies
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2
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280
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Put on a happy face
(Preview)
hi all, been busy but wanted to share this interesting story. so....I was in a really bad mood so I decided to go off and have my own little "poor me" party and sit and sulk by myself for awhile. Well I got bored with that pretty quick so I read the newspaper and it was an article about Ro...
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jillybean1
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6
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382
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Al-anon on FB
(Preview)
I didn't know Al-anon was on Facebook... https://www.facebook.com/AlAnonFamilyGroupsWSO PS....Twitter https://twitter.com/AlAnon_WSO -- Edited by Cathyinaz on Sunday 31st of August 2014 04:03:37 PM
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Cathyinaz
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18
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859
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He relapsed
(Preview)
And, I'm ok! My AH stopped going to meetings 2 weeks ago. I had a feeling that this would happen so I'm not surprised. Working on acceptance today and knowing that this is his choice and I can't control it. Honestly, I am truly ok and ready for whatever God has planned for me at this point.
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andromeda
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16
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588
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Money and Enabeling
(Preview)
I have been in a relationship for over 9 years... 7 of those years he was sober and he relapsed almost 2 years ago. He has been binge drinking basically every month that i know of but i suspect much more. Most recently we have had arguements about money. He heas not been able to maintain stable employment s...
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KRae
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4
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521
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Life is peaceful "at the moment...."
(Preview)
Whilst I was on my vacation, I did everything I could to retain serenity. Despite the drama, I made a point to have fun and enjoy myself as much as I could. It worked. If wasn't for Al-Anon I would have had an awful time. Coming back home, my H thought everything was fine and he was acting as though we were th...
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Luiza
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5
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588
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Losing My Hero
(Preview)
I was told by the Nurse in the hospital the day I lost my Dad, that it would be good for me to share my story... So here I am, openly speaking about my pain for the first time. On May 5, 2014 my father lost his battle with Alcoholism. In 2006, when I was 17, my parents divorced, this was the start of everything...
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FallenAngel
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8
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7465
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different stories
(Preview)
I read about a young girl who was 24 when she died from alcoholism, her mother made her story public here in the uk a couple of years ago. She had serious liver disease, a huge stomach, couldnt walk due to swollen legs, was bright yellow, yet, she still signed out of the hospital to go and drink. She done thi...
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el-cee
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8
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463
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New to Al-Anon...
(Preview)
Hi, everyone... My name is Jessie. I am fresh to Al-Anon. My therapist suggested that I give it a try, given the type of childhood I had. So, I finally went to a meeting. What a eye-opening experience! It was crazy to hear people sharing the same kinds of thoughts that I had, feeling the same feelings I had...
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jessbuddy0014
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3
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325
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Reflections on how the interplay has negatively affected both my recovery and his.
(Preview)
I have had some time to mull over the recent chaos that has crept back into my head. I have had some interesting revelations. I read a good deal of inspirational thoughts and slogans this morning. I like to read them as though they just apply to me (the wife of an Alcoholic). It certainly helps me (and us as...
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sadsusie
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2
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374
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Love and take care of yourself don't depend on the alcoholic
(Preview)
After coming here and going to meetings I realize that my AH does love me but is almost always incapable of being a loving person because he's drunk. He doesn't remember alot of things, conversations, family events etc because he drunk. He tries to cover it up but I can see through it. He's so absorb...
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slowlearner
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4
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428
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Being in a funk, letting myself stay in a funk, realizing that i was SUPPOSED to be in a funk.
(Preview)
I have been in a funk for quite a few days. Part of me thinks that I am failing because I am comfortable here in this funk. Today, I had a change of heart. I feel like I need to be alone (luckily i am lol). I looked on Pinterest for some inspirational thoughts and found many. I finally semi forced myself to tidy...
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sadsusie
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5
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7046
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Problems with fellow member
(Preview)
I've been attending Alanon meetings for nearly three years now; spent several years in CoDA before that - which helped enormously, but then for various reasons I realised that Alanon was where I needed to be. I have no problem with the notion of a HP, and revived my own spiritual faith about 10 years ago...
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Zeroh
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7
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552
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Mahalo Thomas A`Kempis
(Preview)
for this. Reading this morning from out literature to calm my spirit and then my mind and emotions and then my body follows with relaxation. I can continue my day now in a more balanced rhythm and pace. This is what Thomas told me. "Why are thou troubled because things do not succeed with th...
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Jerry F
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16
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773
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Gotta work a program!
(Preview)
I always find that sharing with you all helps me to clarify my thoughts and I always feel better afterwards. My mind is reeling again. I had moved to my own place, have found a happy life for myself, its only been a few months. I still love my AH, very much. He has asked me to come see him, and I did. It was good....
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sadsusie
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8
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460
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New Member
(Preview)
Hello all, I am happy to find the Alanon Family Groups boards, thanks to a friend of mine who is goes to the narcanon forums. I wanted to introduce myself and look forward to joining your community. I am retired and have been married for 23 years. I have two step kids who are both grown and (also have...
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stepsinthesand
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8
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487
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Heartbreaking left my alcoholic boyfriend
(Preview)
I know what i did was right but having a rough time. Why is it that i feel like i did something wrong? And why do i keep thinking he will get better? Its insane i know. He makes me think i am crazy. i feel like i have lost myself. Do they even realize the part they played in destroying the relationship? So confu...
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Holding on
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31
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3952
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Things I'm grateful for
(Preview)
I'm grateful 1st and foremost for a loveing Heavenly Father that's blessed me with 2 beautiful kids that are both successful in life,I'm also grateful for this board that I can always come here to vent or tell whatever's on my mind this board is like a diary to me I've aired everything I can think of,I'm g...
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lookingup
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9
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528
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All talk no action
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I know i keep playing the same sad song, but it helps me to verbalize my pain I am in. I continue to sit back in amazement really. My AH continues to sit in our house and not pay the mortgage. I have to pay rent so I cant pay the mortgage either. He says he will get a job. He hasnt worked in 8 months. I a...
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Newlife girl
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3
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472
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Feeling like I am crazy
(Preview)
I've been reading every bodies posts on here and seems to lean mostly toward the a and relationship issues today,I'm currently Still with my abf as most knows,I'm so waiting on my FTf meetings which I get to begin next mon.i so need my meetings and to find me a sponsor to help me with my step work ever si...
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lookingup
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6
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316
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Riding the emotional roller coaster
(Preview)
Hi all aplologies that this post is not strictly al annon related, but with an AH at home, don't know who else to share with. AH been much better lately, has some control of his drinking (tho I am aware that probably won't last) & we have been enjoying each others company & I've been working my pro...
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Tash2
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4
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437
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PP and Tired tonight...
(Preview)
Thank you both for posts to me, both of which were inspired, hit the mark exactly, and gave me reason to reassess. Not only these two, I appreciate ALL your replies. Thank you thank you all for understanding, patience, and love. Diva
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Diva
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2
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243
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Went to check on ex AH
(Preview)
Went to lunch with my two wonderful dingy long time friends. Then the said ok we are going to see if R is still alive. Found the apt. not home, but this wonderful gal neighbor was only too happy to fill us in. Sadly the older lady he lived with died. So he has been alone there since last october. He must have go...
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Debilyn
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11
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609
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Thought I'd be nice, so….
(Preview)
I brought him a meal when I went out to lunch as I do every day. I could smell it the moment I entered his apartment. Diarrhea all over the carpets, and a mostly finished large bottle of Listerine mouth wash. Why do I torture myself that way? Now I feel just a bit guilty because I have no intention of call...
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Diva
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8
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514
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In tribute to my father - Product of a strong mother and an alcoholic father
(Preview)
As my Dad's 86th birthday approaches, I remember him as a man in his 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s. I remember that his father who died at 46, left my grandmother to raise 5 kids during the depression while he lived with his mother and impregnated another woman and took care only of their son. They we...
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grateful2be
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21
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632
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Explosion of monumental proportions
(Preview)
Tonight there has been an epic explosion. My A went onto facebook to show me something and somehow he or I clicked on a profile of someone else who he became paranoid could see him which is ridiculous, it was just a suggested friend. Well he got up crazily and said he could not trust me, then pack a bag and le...
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shosh18
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20
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591
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Number 5
(Preview)
is named Liam...some of you ladies love that name I've seen and this one is just two hour old right now...2800 miles away and still in our hearts as we have been waiting. He is our 5th great grand-child!! and I've already put in my request that he escape this family disease. Asking for pictures caus...
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Jerry F
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18
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533
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New frontier
(Preview)
I agreed to a date this past Saturday night. I was skeptical abt the whole thing but I went for the experience. We had a good time and I laughed a lot. We have been texting everyday and he makes me laugh so much. I never laughed with my ex...never. I was always in a horrible mood. My worst characteristics cam...
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texasgal
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5
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304
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After being near death twice lately from alcohol poisoning...
(Preview)
and having been air lifted to Philadelphia in order to survive last time, I found him drinking listerine mouth wash. It is a pitiful situation, and, of course it's all my fault, even though he was a drinker long, long before I met him. I didn't know this; and had I known, I'd have run fast in the opposite...
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Diva
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6
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513
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The Step Work Board
(Preview)
will not let me log in. I thought I had registered for that board a few days ago, but when I try to log in it won't let me. Well, then I tried to reset my password for that board, and it let me do that, but still will not let me log in. Well, I thought maybe I hadn't registered for that board, so I tried to registere...
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cloudyskies
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5
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261
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complacency
(Preview)
I believe that we are just as sick as the alcoholic when we have or still live with alcoholism. Many of the symptoms are the same and if thats true then im burling drunk right now, or the equivelent. Ive gotten complacent I think. Ive lost touch with my sponsor, my hp, ive not picked up the phone in a while an...
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el-cee
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18
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868
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I just wish ..
(Preview)
the STBAX would go away. We had another awful interchange actually I was out of it .. this was between him and our daughter. That kid is so her mother's daughter and he brought it on himself. She did REALLY well considering. Now he's managed to alienate the kids completely and they don't want to go on...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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387
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Making progress slowly
(Preview)
My abf is back in town again. He works in camp as an electrician. He works 2 weeks in and one week out. I have known him 4 months now and had moved some of my belongs into his house and I have left the remainder of my belongs in my apartment that I have not given up. To make a long story short, he has gone through 3 j...
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joker
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3
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468
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Divorce Is In The Works
(Preview)
My papers were served, he had 3 weeks to respond and did, even though he doesn't want to divorce. He did get his slip after a year of sobriety stopped and is back on track and for that I'm happy but it was enough to make my decision that I was done putting my life on hold and playing a waiting game. I have been on...
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wornoutmrsfixit
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13
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636
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Resentments & need online sponsor
(Preview)
Today me and my AH got into a heated argument. Like usual the first thing I did was tell him to go to his "friends" (people he drinks/uses with). Then I proceeded to tell him that I throw the stuff he's done in his face because it's what he always does. He is a binge drinker and is currently sober a...
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deramam
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5
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357
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Step 2
(Preview)
Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery togetherhttp://stepwork.activeboard.com/t58427338/alanon-step-2/
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hotrod
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0
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179
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Dilemma
(Preview)
I have made the decision to file for divorce from my AH. It has been a very long journey to this point, but I know it is time. My dilemma lies in the execution. We have been together for 22 years and married for 15. We have been separated for the past 7 months and due to the fact that I was SAHM, I have remain...
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Tossed Salad
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14
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529
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Resentment versus Opinion versus Confusion
(Preview)
Hi everyone! Hope all is well...I went to my AH's rehab center Saturday for the annual renewal day and had a nice time. Good to see my friends from my initial introduction to group family therapy a year ago! So my family counselor from there always says I have resentments over the 1/2 way house. So, I gave...
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Flower49
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9
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522
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And the manipulation begins...
(Preview)
So following the drama a couple of days ago, H had one drink yesterday and one today so far. People are drinking less too and not offering to get him any drinks - a part from his dad who tried twice. Anyway, he was bit by a small insect today and OMG, he is in so much pain you know? He actually told his mum he i...
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Luiza
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21
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890
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“Let me think, I need help”
(Preview)
My way trough he double hockey stick began somewhere in February last. My husband and me are living abroad. We are expats, and we have been married for almost 20 years. My husband started experiencing problems with allocutions all of a sudden one day in February. He was offered advancement at his...
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Lovebear
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3
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501
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SIL
(Preview)
My AH's sister is one who parties all the time and smokes weed all the time but thinks she's a responsible mature adult. She tries to play the victim every chance she gets. My H and her mother died last yr and the estate lawyer has mailed emailed and called her to finish the estate and she has ignored him. Sh...
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deramam
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9
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441
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I detached, he left
(Preview)
So over the past few weeks I have kept away from my A as in I haven't seen him, but we have message'd from time to time. Usually with him messaging me things about how he has a new sponsor or how he's going to meetings on a daily basis and how he has counselling sessions arranged. To all of them I simply reply sa...
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Flossy
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8
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549
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I am feeling so much right now!!!!
(Preview)
I have my biopsy on Wednesday and my sponsor comes back tomorrow from his 2 week vacation. I have been using my tools, but I am so wide open right now. My cars new transmission is over $2000, my broken right arm has been hurting worse with my new job, because I'm over using it, but I love the job! I have been w...
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Breakingfree
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14
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511
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Improvments
(Preview)
I've written a couple of tortured posts here. Part 1: Part 2: and I thank everyone for their loving, keepin'-it-real advice. A week ago, shortly after my second post, I had a good talk with my ABF and told him how I was increasingly obsessing over him doing the "right thing", and it was maki...
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nichtdaisy
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4
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444
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Facebook and my possible mistake
(Preview)
So I think I did something dumb. I changed my last name on FB back to my maiden name. I was pissed when I did it...I admit it. I just wanted to really detach from AH. Now I am regretting what I did. I thought people would just figure out why I did it without actually asking me about it. No such luck. Coworkers an...
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Newlife girl
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9
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431
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Al-Anon Meetings Dwindling
(Preview)
I've been involved with Al-Anon for about 5-6 years now. I haven't been with my alcoholic ex-boyfriend in about 4+ years now. However, I'm a true co-dependent & realize that I fit the description of co-dependent in so many ways. I feel the need to fix things I cannot fix. Some days are better th...
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Mitsy
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28
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970
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Dishonesty
(
1 2 3
)
(Preview)
I don't know about you, but there was a time in recovery when although my gut instinct told me somebody was lying or manipulating or telling half truths, I'd ignore that and try to "help" or "support" them. I wasted a whole lot of time and energy doing that and I wound up not being...
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grateful2be
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91
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2219
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