The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Tonight's topic was on how to let go of resentments which hit home for me, cause I so resent allowing my abf come back into my home only to make things worse and then kicking him out again that I resent I should've never let him back in my house i have a hatred toward him and i hurt also for all that I've allowed him to do to me,my weight has dropped off tremendously bags under my eyes,etc I'm feeing better now just lonely but lonesome is better than that kind of drama for sure.this day 3 I haven't head a word from him which is great but it's just a matter of time he will be calling and I've got to be stronger this time around to say no and stick to it .ill have to talk to him for a min.to try and get some of my things he ran off with.a family portrait he took off my wall and went out my back door to put in his car for one ,he says when I give him his stuff back and that I'll have to bring it to him a long ways from here then he will give me my stuff back reason is I took his stuff is that he owes me lots money that he never paid me back I can at least sell his things to get some of it back.or may end up just haveing to caulk it up as a great big loss and move on and just hope I get my pic and things back.i need lots of strength right now in staying away from him and not putting my self through this anymore.and i need to know when he is trying to manipulate me and sweet talk me into coming back he uses I miss you and I love you words.and huggy huggy ,kissy,kissy,that's where I fall weak and my legs start feeling like noodles.i fall right into his traps everytime.but he is out and he got his stuff,but left all his winter clothes here he forgot them I guess.
Hi LU I am glad that you attended a meeting and were open enough to hear the shares on resentments. That's a great topic and it sounds as if you reached down deep and discovered your own resentments not only at your boyfriend but at yourself as well. Working through 4 - 10th step on these resentments is a great tool for recovery. Remember it is progress not perfection so having the awareness and acceptance of the situation as it is a powerful step for yourself.
Stay in the moment in the day, keep taking care of yourself and remember to make your asset and gratitude lists daily. That will keep you so busy you won't have time to fret or be angry at your boyfriend.
Good that you attended the meeting and had some insights. Continued online and face to face meetings will help you to discover the strength you already have.
Welcome to the fellowship, fellow alanoner. Resentments is a good topic. I was poisoned by them, I resented everyone for reasons that were insane. Its great that you got to a meeting, you could try and get some phone numbers from members. You dont have to go it alone now, call and they will help you if he shows up.x