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Participation is the key to Harmony
(Preview)
Just finished chairing an alanon meeting, on zoom. I mentioned this in one of my shares that when I originally started attending that meeting, I felt like an AA member going to an alanon meeting, but over the past year or so they have made me feel very welcome. One member gave me a little push and I started...
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Wolfie55
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2
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1339
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January 14 - Hope for Today - Boundaries
(Preview)
Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at setting limits -- boundaries -- around unacceptable behavior. The author sometimes fears that if they set a limit with someone, they will be abandoned. Sometimes they set rigid boundaries in hopes of eliminating the problem forever. Their most su...
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Freetime
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5
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1227
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Volunteer for Daily Reader/Share on Thursdays
(Preview)
Greetings all. We have an open day for which there is no daily reading/share - Thursday(s). If one or two are willing to do this (split this), feel free to either respond here or send me a PM. Happy Thursday!
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Iamhere
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6
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912
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Courage to Change January 12
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading the author reflects on how a bee hive can teach the lesson of detachment - when a colony of bees is at work, as long as one keeps a safe distance and doesn't poke one's nose into the hive, we will be fine. The author reflects that it is their choice, when they sense that a situat...
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Skorpi
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5
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350
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1/11/22 Say Something Often Enough...
(Preview)
Today's read relates a cautionary tale of a member who held the real and perceived woes of the day in countenance and in any conversation chanced upon. Every opportunity was taken to recount and relive the bad things that seemed to happen and the misdeeds of the alcoholic.Predictably, her encounter...
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Enigmatic
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5
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370
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C2C, Monday, 1/10, worry and fear
(Preview)
The writer describes what happens when we focus on worry and fear: we see terrifying pictures, hear paranoid voices, and have self-criticism. The more attention we give this static,we lose our foothold in reality, and nothing useful gets accomplished. We can break this cycle of worry and fear by...
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Lyne
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2
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1196
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Looking 4 online chat help
(Preview)
Hi, my name is Frank I am looking for an online chat to help me. I am new to al-anon but need help starting out. I went to #al-anonchat on irc.chat4all.org . I was greeted by a few ppl there but they told me they could not be of help and i should find an online chat meeting. a person named Tahoe asked a lot of qu...
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Alanonpal
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9
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2666
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Hope for Today Jan 9
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our reactions to others and about understanding that we are responsible for our own happiness. The writer describes suffering in response to his/her partners alcoholic behavior. When the writer contacts his/her sponsor, the writer is told that a r...
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yanksfan51
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3
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375
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Member input sought on the business board.
(Preview)
Greetings MIP family. The chatroom feature of our board has been facing repeated problems of late. It would be appreciated if members could check out the link here to help us reconcile those problems and assess the function in general. Thank you!
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WebHelper
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1
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1363
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January 7 - Hope for Today - The 3 C's
(Preview)
Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at Al-Anon's beloved three C's about our powerlessness over alcoholism -- I didn't Cause It, I can't Control it, and I can't Cure it. To the author of this reading, embracing this slogan relieves them of the guilty feeling that they could have done mor...
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Freetime
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4
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1312
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Importance of A Group
(Preview)
On Christmas Day, I chaired a zoom meeting in my district. Until recently, I haven't chaired any al-anon meetings but one day I put on my big boy pants and tried it. Wasn't too bad. I do it regularly and now I'm beginning to feel more a part of that group. It's not my home group. My home group has not held meet...
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Wolfie55
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7
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1811
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Courage to Change January 5
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author shares about the meaning of "compassion." When the author first arrived at Al-Anon, they thought compassion meant making excuses or covering for the alcoholic. Through Al-Anon, the author learned that making excuses and covering for others is "enabling" -...
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Skorpi
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4
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393
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Boundaries- manipulation?
(Preview)
Hello, new to Alanon and this forum. Boundaries are something I am still learning and working on. I have a question though, if I set a boundary, say "I will stay at my parent's house if I feel unsafe" or "I will ask you to leave the relationship and house if you are not in active recovery, working steps an...
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MaryFL
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6
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2057
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C2C 1/4/22 The Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with One Step...
(Preview)
Today's writer recalls feelings of loneliness and desperation at time of Alanon discovery, of wanting the serenity that members there seemed to enjoy.The opportunity was not lost as the newcomer absorbed what had worked for others: Attending/sharing at meetings, work the Steps (in order, one at...
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Enigmatic
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4
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1691
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C2C, Monday, 1/3: I can change the past if I stop repeating it in the present.
(Preview)
The writer of Mondays reading explores how to make positive changes: -ask, am I moving in a positive direction? -am I going to meetings and practicing the principles?-am I breaking out of unhealthy and unsatisfying patterns of the past? -can I set goals and take small risks on a daily basis? -can I ta...
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Lyne
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3
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371
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Happy New Year MIP Family!!
(Preview)
Sending my best wishes to the MIP Family for a very prosperous and enlightening 2022!!
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DM2021
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3
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2443
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Funny, but not really
(Preview)
Whats funny, but perhaps its more ironic, is that I can go for months in a mental state of letting go, live and let live, think, how important is it, etc. etc. etc. Since Christmas Eve, when my As drinking was apparent and in my face, I have not been able to let it go. So the question Im asking myself, after...
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Lyne
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2
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1822
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Hope for Today Jan 2
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: And Happy New Year! Todays reading is about the power of the serenity prayer. The writer describes this as the first tool used in recovery. Not being able to alter the past, having the power to change our attitudes and resentments and having hope about the potential for our ow...
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yanksfan51
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2
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1919
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Back to the drawing board for me.
(Preview)
Funny how things come together. I posted a little while back about how I am writing a book about living through domestic violence and how I wasn't sure if I could or couldn't mention that al-anon was a HUGE part of my way out. That prompted some discussions and thinking about privacy and anonymity that I...
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Youknowme
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12
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1775
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December 31 - Hope for Today - Consistency
(Preview)
The December 31 reading in Hope for Today reflects on the consistently repeated phrases heard in the Suggested Welcome and Closing at Al-Anon meetings.No situation is really hopeless, and we can find contentment and even happiness whether the alcoholic is still drinking or notWe can put our prob...
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Freetime
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6
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1585
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Courage to Change December 29
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that there are times when everything the alcoholic in their life does irritates them. It seems that the alcoholic even pours the breakfast cereal wrong! The author uses this as an opportunity to reflect on what is going on internally. Is there a revie...
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Skorpi
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7
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931
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C2C, Monday 12/27: Differing opinions? Carry your QTIP!
(Preview)
The writer ponders the issue of facing different opinions, and what to do at that point: take a stance that one is right and one is wrong, defend oneself, take the disagreement personally, or be grateful that there are numerous ways of looking at life. The writer goes on to say if we can practice grati...
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Lyne
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4
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1042
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12/28/21 ODAT What Road is Paved With Good Intentions, for 400
(Preview)
Today's reading encourages exploration of our intentions, particularly the gaps between intended and actual outcomes.For a variety of reasons, it is possible that our intention in anything from offering kind encouragement, increasing productivity, offering kind assistance, to creating an...
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Enigmatic
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4
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451
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The chatroom
(Preview)
I got a report this morning that the person who took over the old chatroom is still bothering people. If this person is in the new chatroom, please send a message to me. In the new chat room I have the power to ban this person if we're in the chat at the same time. If you're still going to the old chatroom, stop...
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JamesCT
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1
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862
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Service Positions - Moderation for Chat/Meeting Room - Al-Anon
(Preview)
https://alanon.activeboard.com/t68108906/service-positions-moderation-for-chatm...
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Iamhere
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0
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943
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EARTHROCK
(Preview)
Im wondering if this earth rocker is the DAViD you had problems with and banned in here on the board. Just prior to earthrocker showing up in the chatroom. David was in the chatroom. Someone asked him about being banned on here and he wouldnt say why. He banned Tahoe a 20 year alanon member on MIP...
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nursedebbi
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4
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1633
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Not silent anymore
(Preview)
Last week I posted about not asking the question I knew the answer to. Well last night at our Xmas dinner with family, my A made about 5 trips to the car. We all knew she was drinking. And I knew she was drinking last week but didnt ask. Well I didnt ask this morning, but said I wanted to tell her something...
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Lyne
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7
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854
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Not so merry...
(Preview)
After decades of using MIP's #alanon chatroom I'm sad to say that it has had a 'hostile takeover' by a narcissistic jerk and is no longer controlled by MIP. The jerk using the nickname 'earthrocker' banned me from the chatroom, and I have no access to it. He is exactly what an alanon chatroom doesn't n...
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Tahoe1
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6
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1220
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Silence C2C 25 December
(Preview)
In Al-Anon we learn to Think before reacting to angry outbursts and drunken accusations. We also learn the value of silence.
But silence can be more cutting that cruel words when it is used to punish.
Deliberately ignoring someones attempts to communicate can be no better than a battle of words. Ra...
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Bettertomorrow
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4
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660
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EARTHROCKER
(Preview)
Earthrocker has taken control of the MIP chatroom for alanon group. He even bestowed upon himself moderator control unless someone from MIP gave it to him?? He banned a very long time member of MIP Tahoe. Tahoe used to be moderator in there for along time. A while back his moderator status was r...
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nursedebbi
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2
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932
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Hope for Today Dec 26
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on finding love we are seeking- within ourselves. The writer describes going from an alcoholic home hoping to feel love and then transferring that expectation of love to an alcoholic boyfriend. The writer lived for his love and kept wanting and exp...
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yanksfan51
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1
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741
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Merry Christmas!
(Preview)
hello Alanon Family, hope all is well, im been gone from here a long time,needing get back. im glad to be posting now, all has been ok in my world ,non perfect but ok. still single and loving it compared to where i was 8 yrs ago before my alanon recovery. hope to chat to others here,.......hugs looking up
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lookingup
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4
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992
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Who is EarthRocker
(Preview)
this person named earthrocker has taken over mip meeting room ,keeps running ppl off, he is very strange and scary. he comes in room n stayes never leaves and talks scary, he also has OP ,dunno how he managed getting that. he has told me that he is graduating alanoners out,and that god is his qualifier,,...
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lookingup
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7
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828
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Mele Kalikimaka
(Preview)
Yeppers I again say it in my native language ...Hawaiian. Merry Christmas to my loving, caring, recovering family. I am not home in the islands at the moment but under the cold rain in Clovis California. It is what it is whether I am fond of it or not. This is my wife territory and I am riding along. ...
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JerryF
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7
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1500
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If you know the answer to a question, don’t ask
(Preview)
I heard that phrase on the message board maybe 8 yrs agoit sticks in my head. Im quite sure my A came home drunk last night although she insists she no longer drinks. She was tearful on and off, perseverating, talking non-stop, and after 45 min. I said I had to get ready for bed. Did I want to confront her...
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Lyne
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5
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1063
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Love and Laughter
(Preview)
Hi, it's WendyP, I decided to share some Love and Laughter with all of you. As I share my feelings, pain and fears, I thought why not share my Love and Laughter as well. Yesterday, one of my Great Grand Son's came over to spend the day with me, he is 6 going on 7. I have a number of Grand's and Great's, and all o...
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WendyP
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4
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711
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December 24 - Hope for Today
(Preview)
The author of today's page in Hope for Today used Step Two when visiting with family on a holiday. When the family's behavior made them uncomfortable, our author chose to go to another room and pray/meditate for serenity and guidance to keep focused on themselves and the present moment. This allow...
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Freetime
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3
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995
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Courage to Change December 22
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that at first, we might focus on applying Al-Anon principles to only one family situation, but there are many ways we can keep the program with us wherever we go. Some members chose to carry literature in a lunch box, pocket, or purse so we can touch bas...
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Skorpi
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3
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318
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I had to leave
(Preview)
In an Alanon Group is this acceptable?
Calling you out in front of everyone in a public restaurant and other group members. Than making you apologize just because you left abruptly because you didnt want to argue or fight because you were above all humilated.
They say she isnt talking to us like tha...
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flower19
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3
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451
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12/21/21 C2C People We Have Harmed…
(Preview)
Today's page considers the work of steps 8 & 9 as we list those we have harmed...and reminds not to forget to include ourselves. We cannot, nor should not focus our efforts on saving or changing others. In Alanon we learn to turn our focus and efforts toward restoring the damage within ourselves. T...
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Enigmatic
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2
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309
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I'm Home
(Preview)
MIP family - I am 'home' - my house, my couch, my food and soon - my bed with my pillow and blanket. I am a very tired gal who's body clock is a bit screwed up because of different time zones, yet am playing catch up 'here'. I left my home 2 weeks ago today and drove for 18 hours (stopped, for the first time @ a h...
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Iamhere
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27
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1889
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A wish for peace for everyone!
(Preview)
Hello! I came by to wish everyone a peaceful holiday season. This is my first holiday season as a Former spouse of an alcoholic and I am feeling the great pleasure and luxury of a life that is not driven by the need to fix/control/accommodate the Q in my life. As I type this, I'm getting ready for bed after...
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Fedora
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5
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437
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New
(Preview)
Hi I'm new to all this. I found this forum through Google. I have not been to a meeting yet. I'm hoping to go in the next couple of weeks. I am living with my alcoholic boyfriend of 5 years. The first year was good but it has been downward spiraling since. He drinks from the moment he wakes up to the moment he go...
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NewGirl1717
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4
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914
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C2C, 12/20, How do we really help?
(Preview)
This reading discusses the purpose of alanon, (to help families and friends of alcoholics), but how is this actually done? We are reminded to practice the 12 Steps, to learn to love ourselves, attend to our own spiritual needs, and then it is possible for others to see something special in us. Next is...
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Lyne
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3
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320
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Need a little "real time" help
(Preview)
My Ex and I have limited contact. Text only. The first year of separation and then as the divorce went through, I tried to be the best "Ex spouse" I could be. Many times doing things that ended up hurting me - b/c I didn't want my kid's dad to relapse and I wanted my kid to learn that these things could be amica...
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PosiesandPuppies
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5
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431
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Hope for Today Dec 19
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about how al-anon is a focus on ourselves, not the alcoholic(s) in our lives or anyone else. For many of us, it takes a while to understand that we have the ability to redirect the focus and energy on other people on ourselves instead. Like the writer, I rememb...
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yanksfan51
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2
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285
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December 17 - C2C - Bless Them, Change Me
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change discusses the suggestion that we pray for those we have resented. The author found this difficult at first, but eventually learned to stop praying that other people would change, and instead pray that the other person be given the serenity, love, and joy that w...
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Freetime
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3
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1012
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Courage to Change December 15
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on Step 3 - turning my life over to the care of a Higher Power. At first, the author was confused - how could they do this? The author's need for control made the thought of turning their life over to the care of a Higher Power very scary. The author wasn'...
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Skorpi
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3
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1509
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I desperately need help from people here who understand...
(Preview)
Hi. it feels good to be back. it.s been many years since I was here. I feel very vulnerable spilling my guts here because i feel new. But i desperately need support and encouragement if possible. I left my alcoholic husband in 2015. We have been divorced since 2016. I am very angry at myself for being ign...
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Newlifegirl67
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8
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2125
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12/14/21 ODAT – Powerlessness, Restoration: No Limits…
(Preview)
Today's page considers types of loss, including the contributor's paralyzing loss of someone close. Lessons learned: Our powerlessness does not make exceptions for us, nor does the power of restoration promised us through a power greater than ourselves...we can overcome anything.Reminder: N...
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Enigmatic
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2
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1436
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C2C, 12/13, Live and let live
(Preview)
The reading for Monday 12/13, describes riding a bicycle as helping one feel alive and in balance. The ride on a bike can bring vitality into each day, the same way applying live and let live can. The author tries to embrace whatever life brings, sorrow and joy. If you live your own life to the fullest...
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Lyne
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3
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986
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December 10 - C2C - Knowing Myself
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change describes how doing a Fourth Step inventory helped someone discover who they truly are, and to decide what behaviors they want to keep or to change. Previously, they did not know their own wants and needs, and could not distinguish between acceptable and unac...
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Freetime
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7
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1625
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Hope for Today Dec 12
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about how living with alcoholism can make it difficult or even impossible to see the person rather than the disease. Not only can we become so focused on the alcoholism that we no longer see the person, we can easily lose sight of who we are (as our mission become...
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yanksfan51
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3
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861
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C2C December 11th
(Preview)
Today's reading concerns wishing for happiness. In our modern, consumer society we associate money with happiness. We know this is not true, money cannot remove the effects alcoholism has on individuals and families. Serenity is free of charge at Al Anon meetings, but cannot be bought with mone...
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Bettertomorrow
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2
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982
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Courage to Change December 8
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author reflects on how alcohol-related troubles can be like an avalanche. A mound of snow cannot grow indefinitely taller without falling down. Similarly, an alcoholic's mountain of troubles will eventually come crashing down. Through Al-Anon, the author learne...
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Skorpi
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4
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1916
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12/7/21 ODAT - A Good Place to Start...
(Preview)
'Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they, too, have their story.'Whether this passage is fro...
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Enigmatic
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5
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1445
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C2C, 12/6, anger
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 12/6, talks about discovering that they have anger towards the alcoholic. At first the writer felt more whole and powerful, but it was not expressed in a healthy way. Alanon helped the author focus on themself, look for their part, and accept being powerless. The writer le...
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Lyne
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3
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1264
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Hope for Today Dec 5
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a look at how our perception of things can be distorted and make it difficult for us to see and appreciate our spiritual gifts. The writer describes a situation as a young parent when she took the time to pick out what she believed were the exact type of carrots he...
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yanksfan51
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3
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1766
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Poking My head in the door
(Preview)
Hi. Bernie here. Just poking my head in the door. Wanted to say hello to all. Hope you are all safe and well. We're all good here. Nancy and I are both retired now. It's time. I'm experiencing some physical pain because of a problem with my leg but it's being treated so I try to take that a day at a time. As man...
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Wolfie55
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6
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2350
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Writing about my experiences.
(Preview)
Hey folks, Mel (Melly) Here. I little while back I posted something I was writing that contained mentions of my al-anon experiences. At the time it was just a draft and I had included the first name of a member. The immediate feedback was "Hello, Mel, al-ANON" and I felt ashamed of the careless way I had...
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Youknowme
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5
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2822
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