Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jennfer32 · Jennfer32

I have always been a logical, analytical thinker. Today, I am working on detachment. Detachment with love.....and it starts for me, learning about the disease of alcoholism. My father in law (h's step dad) passed away 4 yrs ago, and was a recovering alcoholic who was heavy into AA, an...

sarahlm · sarahlm

I am so sick of dealing with his insanity. I told AH some bad news today and he totally lost it on me and accused me of trying to upset him on purpose. Im so irritated. HE IS IN JAIL so Im supposed to tiptoe around everything and sugar coat it!! Plus it was the answer to a question he wnted me to find!!!!!! He put...

sunny123 · sunny123

So, here I am packing up my stuff while my AH is at his firm retreat that I was supposed to go on. It is so hard to find the strength to pack and sort when I am so upset and grieving. Moving is hard enough, but dealing with a separation, possible divorce, no job, no apartment is too much. I am trying to take it fir...

gardengal · gardengal

It says cannot connect.........??????

Lana · Lana

So, why I’m I so afraid to let people know who I am? I keep trying to get an account going here, but I have to keep deleting and changing my account because of something I said, something someone else said or didn’t say, or because the alias I picked didn't "feel right." I see people that have 300+ post a...

nycbt · nycbt

I been at my job eight years ago. In eight years I have changed so much. I moved down to where I live now eight yrs ago. I have since gotten married. Started alanon. Have grown alot with alanon. Made alot of friends. Been working on my self more.

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello ((Everyone)) I don't know what to say in my post, I do know I need to stay connected to all the positive places and people in my life. After the last year of learning about myself and how to care for myself again, and making the decision to leave my husband, house etc it seems my brain is on vacation....

gardengal · gardengal

I would like to hear how you let go of people and situations you cannot change. This comes so hard for so many of us especially when it concerns a loved one, when all we "think" we are doing is "trying to help. etc etc................

twinmom2 · twinmom2

This week has been a week for me to focus on program and hone in on my progress. I see now that I need to find a sponser to help me out with my personal inventory. I also know that I need a person to call when i have a question about recovery or something I need to talk through. I am really s...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Somewhere in reconciling with my A I think I got lost in staying quiet and praying silently and forgot about setting clear boundaries. I can see now that my A has not taken many steps to growth. Since he's been home he lost three jobs and has not brought home a steady paycheck in 2 months.&nb...

jecy · jecy

well my addict lost here job today. she couldnt even keep her job after all the breaks they gave her. i went into the store to today and her boss asked i had seen her and i hadnt nor had i heard from her ( which was nice) he said she hadnt showed up nor called and a co-worker went to get her and she said shed be ther...

debilyn · debilyn

It was my insurance co. who ordered surveillance spell, to see the level of activity at my home. Which is fine, but I am not suppose to see them! I let her know the horribleness of it and how it could have been so bad. I even put my Lusterpig who loves me on the front porch with blankets! He hates visi...

Lindy · Lindy

Hi, I haven't been on here for a while, but my AH has been working out of town A LOT of long hours so I really don't see him during the week. I usually talk to him during the week, but he has no time to get good and drunk. He comes home on the weekends and things have been okay for the most part. I am noticing that he...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

As I sit here this morning asking myself am I enabling.....maybe I'm doing the things I do for him to help myself........I don't want to feel like I just threw him away.........Also I think tIhis is one of the reasons I stayed so long........how do you just throw someone away that you love....I must hav...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

My A did not respond to the letter I sent him on Monday. I woke up this morning crying. I sent him a text saying "I miss my sweet wonderful "A" :(. Are you ready to try again at a slower pace? I do love you" He did not respond. Instead of being sad and accepting the fact he has rejected me and left me hear...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Hi Roomies, I'm having a little trouble with this one today. My A and I are in the middle of a law suit(malpractice). As far as i can tell it is my word against his the doctor. I did not lie on the stand I did my best to tell the story my way. I feel he lied alot. But now it is up...

serendipity · serendipity

my a husband called and left a message yesterday. the kids and i haven't seen him in 3 months. he hadn't called in a week. he is living with his mother and his brothers and sisters who all drink and do drugs. but the thing is he wants to see the kids. i told him last time that i would not allow the kids over to his...

Jennfer32 · Jennfer32

It has been one week since I asked my H to leave. I hear in my head his voice "i can not be who you want me to be". I have to ask myself what it is that i wanted him to be...and it gives me healing, because i know all i was asking for was to be married to the man that i chose 13 yrs ago. I made a list....

Barbara · Barbara

Yup - this is what Im asking. To be able to live side by side with A husband and be able to happily do all the chores. Think its possible? He hasnt mowed the grass in years. Ive actually stopped the lawn man a few years ago. Why should we grow grass if Im the only one out there mowing it? I see all the neighbors...

Jennfer32 · Jennfer32

I wrote a letter to my husband today. I don't know that I will give it to him, but the message is heartfelt, and writing makes my head clearer....Thought I would share with those of you who feel the same way........ H, I think it is important for me to share with you a few of my thoughts as i go thro...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

I read Hope for today March 18th yesterday. I think my HP is trying to tell me something. I am working on that one. My A I think has been sober since the last week in April. I did find an empty bottle of wine in the trash. I thought about bringing it up but it is not that important & not my responsib...

Miranda · Miranda

I really need someone to talk to. I'm really scared, and freaked, and I'm so so confused. I don't know what to do. I just need someone to help me. Could someone come to a meeting to talk, or something? I just really need help. Mir

Barbara · Barbara

People say "Its not all about you". Program says "Keep the focus on you". How do you differentiate? Talk about the other person but keep thoughts on yourself? Difference btwn ppl in program and those no?

hudsond · hudsond

It is amazing how seeing a glimpse of light can cause life to turn upside down. Sunday my ah decided to go back to meetings. He made 2 had 2 sober days. I am not certain, he didn't talk about it, but I think he used yesterday. I didn't want to ask if he had gone to a meeting, I felt lik...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Found this one in my files today, and always loved it..... As always, feel free to alter the word "God" to "God of my understanding", but the sentiment is right on the money.... Enjoy!! Tom MEMO FROM GOD To: YOU Date: TODAY From: THE BOSS Subject: YOURSELF Referenc...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hello Roomies, My grandfather goes into surgery for a double bypass at 6:30am. Please pray for him. I love him so much. And I know he is in God's hands and that is such a comfort. But I still can't help but be scared that I am going to lose my hero. Thanks for your support. Much Love,

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

I have not heard from my A since Fri afternoon of last week. I sent a letter to him Mon - not asking for an explanation, more letting him know I love him and will never turn my back on him and that I will love him forever, pray for him always, and hope for the best for a wonderful and worthwhile person......

Barbara · Barbara

He saved the emails from Jan/Feb. I called our mother controlling, etc. He doesnt see that having me testify may be detrimental to his case.

penny · penny

Yes the bubble has burst big time. I have walked out and have rented a flat at an address only my daughter knows. The lies he is telling people is beyond belief. I cant cope any more with his drinking, its a litre or more of vodka a day and I cant compete. I feel exhausted its been&...

angel123 · angel123

Reflections are from the Forum(meeting in my pocket) People who practice what they preach usually do a minimum of preching.Forum 1973 When you are ready to go over the edge remeber that God,in his wisdom and mercy,made the world round.Forum 1994

angeleyes8462 · angeleyes8462

Got a question on recovery? I haven't been coming to the board or this site very long. I am learning detachment which I am finding to be more difficult lately for me. I find myself when talking to him talking about future. I know I shouldn't be doing that "how do I stop from getting myself roped in...

peewee · peewee

For anyone who cares to read, there is a wealth of information on this site regarding research being done on the scientific effects of alcohol. www.utexas.edu/research/asrec/alcoholfacts.html MsPeewee

Jennfer32 · Jennfer32

I am a wife of an alcoholic. I married him when I was 22 yrs old, and he was my best friend. My saviour from a homelife with a bipolar mother. I was independent, strong, and determined at that time, and had the great wall of China built up around me, and brick by brick, he knocked i...

jecy · jecy

hi, i'm new to this. i've sat and read all the posts, and have found comfort and support in them. i responded to one because it felt like my life. i am 34 years old w/ 2 beautiful teenagers. i have been divorced for 7 years now. i have been w/ my partner for the last 6 years. when i met her she was just a b...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

This site is not where you can endulge in outside issues or promote and advertise outside endeavors/causes. While what you are doing may be with good intent and seemingly harmless it is outside the scope of Al-Anon, is not endorsed by Al-Anon WSO, nor this Al-Anon WSO registered group's busin...

robyn76 · robyn76

Hi all~ So, I have been separated for three weeks now and yesterday was our anniversary. Kind of awkward...we did go out last night just went and sat at a picnic table by the ocean and talked. I had a really nice night. It's funny how all of the little things I used to want to do (like t...

Elizabeth M · Elizabeth M

Ok so I am not suppose to express anger when he drinks..Stay calm I am told...focus on myself...but I am angry...yes it is a disease...he doesn't see the problem...if not anger then what acceptance? indifference? concern?....act like nothing is wrong...but the...

helga · helga

To anyone out there; I am so tired of being the flashing, neon light for addicts I could scream. I feel like I am invisible to "normal" men, and that only those who have addiction issues see me in a crowd. It seem that the only men who are attacted to me are addicts in some form or fashion. Oh, I'...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

I still have not tt my A since Fri afternoon. I cannot call him, he discarded me so harshly, I just cannot do it. I keep praying and releasing him to God and asking God to release me from loving him...what is the point if we are not going to be together? It was hard Saturday. Friday nights my A and I al...

kimmy123 · kimmy123

Hello, I am new to this Al-Anon site, but I was hoping that I could get some good advice and guidance in my time of desperate need. Never in my wildest imagination did I ever think that I would be living in the life that I am right now. It is one of desperation and hopelessness. Here is my story. I mar...

sparkette · sparkette

Funny that I should give myself such a gift on that wonderful day. I had my youngest daughter with me on a beautiful hike and while we sat near my favorite small, wonderous waterfall, she drew while I wrote. I think there is much to learn about giving ourselves joy and love so that is why I share it with my yo...

foggy · foggy

Hi All, I'm new here. I am a middle aged Mom, happily married, recovered alcholic. I have five sisters and we are all the classic product of Alcoholic parents who destroyed their careers, marriage and for awhile, some of us. Of the six sisters, three of us beat the disease and live h...

Jennfer32 · Jennfer32

I am new to this site, and started a post earlier, trying to tell my story. I got nauseaous..dizzy...sick....typing my past out in this pure white window...i deleted it. I went on to read the posts here, and found that I didn't have to type anything, because so many someone'...

sweetr72 · sweetr72

Hi everyone, I will start off with a quick introduction. My name is Dawn and I am from Ontario, Canada. I have been involved with Alanon for 2 years. I havent been to a meeting for a few months and im planning on attending one or more this week. My life is just in shambles right now. My common law went bac...

T47 · T47

sorry we do not give advice in Al-Anon, please join us in chat and we can offer our experience strength and hope to you in chat or here on the board if you just post your story and questions. Post edited for content. -- Edited by jrtjosey at 00:10, 2006-05-16

horselover58 · horselover58

Happy moments, praise God Difficult moments, seek God Quiet moments, worship God Painful moments, trust God Every moment, thank God Debbie

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Even though he is out of my home I still feel like I am enabling. He makes me feel bad for him, I know this is part of the con the game. Since he can not drive right now he calls me for everything, take me to the Dr. take me to the dentist......I need to just say no....One day I actually did...but mostly I jus...

kitty · kitty

I know it is only me that I'm failing. It is difficult to admit, the weakness ~ physically especially, I always had that to fall back on. Most girls can't lift 100# easily... now since I fell ill last year & the totalling of my car, I am so atrophied & weak, it is frustrating &a...

abbyal · abbyal

IN THE EARLY YRS IN AL- ANON THE WORD SPIRITUAL AWAKENING USED TO CONFUSE ME ALOT I DIDN'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT IT WAS . THEN I FOUND A ONE LINER THAT SIMPLY SAID A SPIRITUAL AWAKENING WAS AS SIMPLE AS HAVING A CHANGE IN ATTITUDE. (AND SUPRISE SUPRISE I HAD ACTUALLY HAD A FEW . HEHE OUR CO FOUN...

kspear · kspear

Hello all, I have a question, which I suspect I know the answer to, but am going to ask nonetheless. Typically, I am not an emotional person (well, I suppose that's not entirely true, I do angry pretty well...). I guess what I mean is that I don't cry. Over the last few weeks, I hav...

justme · justme

The Hole One I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless... It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Two I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t belie...

bubbles1990 · bubbles1990

I know tomorrow is Mothers's Day and my kids are really special and I LOVE them with all my heart there is also a great sadness for my mom who killed herself 6 yrs ago and the pain of sadness I still feel knowing this dieases killed her!!!! I am finding that as the years pass and the more I am here in alanon that...

kitty · kitty

Do they burn out instantaneously or fade away slowly? I know you can see them from far away, that blue light they use at airports, so even a glint is enough, a tiny very hot spark. Turn inward to GOD, love, to learn to love myself & not feel the guilt of placing other's first... will it tak...

peewee · peewee

Hi there, It's great to come here and blow off steam. You don't even Have to listen, but I can pose a question to myself or anyone who cares to join in :) When hub gets fussy, interrrupts my talk, uptight, says close the door, fuss fuss, ewwwwwwwww, I get sarcastic, walk away, start sere...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

I have read in Alanon lit. that the spouses, parents, sibs, and children get so caught up in what the A is doing, their lives become unmanageable because the A and their behavior becomes their addiction and obsession. I obsess when my A has done something I don't like or if I have an issue I know I ne...

mastiff · mastiff

Hi all, just checking in. Have heard people have been wondering where i was in the room so i thought i'd post real quick... I had surgery on the 10th, nothing serious, but nothing i wanted to share with the room with, kinda personal, and i didn't want to make everyone worry. They ha...

lilms · lilms

Today I was asked to share in a forum on joy versus happiness. This is my take. Every day at least once, maybe 3 or 4 times my other half asks me if I am happy. Often I need to answer no. Sometimes that is not possible given the situation that we are living with. Joy on the other hand, almost always. Jo...

megan · megan

Hello my friends old and new Yesterday marks 1 year since I left my A husband of 14 years. I have had such a good year of growth I just wanted to post and say how good my life has become. I have reconnected with my family. I traveled to the Netherlands to visit my...

mac57 · mac57

I wrote this in a share, in our mtg today; so i KNOW i didnt write it really, it was a gift to us, and so here it is: as i turn within myself it’s only love i find and as i find that love is true and that my love is mine my heart brings my joy to me and fills my ey...

gardengal · gardengal

I pose this question, as so many times, so many of us alanoners beat ourselves up for reacting to an A's actions. I know time after time, after the fact, I would sit and cry and wonder why I said and did the things I did. After years of being told I was crazy I started to beleive that I was, because of my actions...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Learning Healthy Compassion (Preview) I have always been a logical, analytical thinker. Today, I am working on detachment. Detachment with love.....and it starts for me, learning about the disease of alcoholism. My father in law (h's step dad) passed away 4 yrs ago, and was a recovering alcoholic who was heavy into AA, an...	Jennfer32	5	449	May 20, 2006 by kent_s
	I hate him!!!!! (Preview) I am so sick of dealing with his insanity. I told AH some bad news today and he totally lost it on me and accused me of trying to upset him on purpose. Im so irritated. HE IS IN JAIL so Im supposed to tiptoe around everything and sugar coat it!! Plus it was the answer to a question he wnted me to find!!!!!! He put...	sarahlm	6	749	May 20, 2006 by feelinhopeful
	Packing Up (Preview) So, here I am packing up my stuff while my AH is at his firm retreat that I was supposed to go on. It is so hard to find the strength to pack and sort when I am so upset and grieving. Moving is hard enough, but dealing with a separation, possible divorce, no job, no apartment is too much. I am trying to take it fir...	sunny123	2	399	May 20, 2006 by sunny123
	Is anyone else having problems getting into chat? (Preview) It says cannot connect.........??????	gardengal	1	382	May 20, 2006 by jrtjosey
	who am I? (Preview) So, why I’m I so afraid to let people know who I am? I keep trying to get an account going here, but I have to keep deleting and changing my account because of something I said, something someone else said or didn’t say, or because the alias I picked didn't "feel right." I see people that have 300+ post a...	Lana	11	772	May 20, 2006 by Maria123
	8 yrs ago (Preview) I been at my job eight years ago. In eight years I have changed so much. I moved down to where I live now eight yrs ago. I have since gotten married. Started alanon. Have grown alot with alanon. Made alot of friends. Been working on my self more.	nycbt	7	469	May 20, 2006 by Maria123
	Not sure what to say (Preview) Hello ((Everyone)) I don't know what to say in my post, I do know I need to stay connected to all the positive places and people in my life. After the last year of learning about myself and how to care for myself again, and making the decision to leave my husband, house etc it seems my brain is on vacation....	Jennifer	4	466	May 20, 2006 by Maria123
	Question? Have you let go of the people and situations you cannot change? (Preview) I would like to hear how you let go of people and situations you cannot change. This comes so hard for so many of us especially when it concerns a loved one, when all we "think" we are doing is "trying to help. etc etc................	gardengal	2	441	May 20, 2006 by jennneeefffurrr
	When is it enabling and when is it helping? (Preview) This week has been a week for me to focus on program and hone in on my progress. I see now that I need to find a sponser to help me out with my personal inventory. I also know that I need a person to call when i have a question about recovery or something I need to talk through. I am really s...	twinmom2	4	508	May 20, 2006 by gardengal
	Big Revelation but it feels yucky... (Preview) Somewhere in reconciling with my A I think I got lost in staying quiet and praying silently and forgot about setting clear boundaries. I can see now that my A has not taken many steps to growth. Since he's been home he lost three jobs and has not brought home a steady paycheck in 2 months.&nb...	twinmom2	3	464	May 20, 2006 by maresie
	lost job and hope... (Preview) well my addict lost here job today. she couldnt even keep her job after all the breaks they gave her. i went into the store to today and her boss asked i had seen her and i hadnt nor had i heard from her ( which was nice) he said she hadnt showed up nor called and a co-worker went to get her and she said shed be ther...	jecy	5	574	May 20, 2006 by maresie
	I am safe guys (Preview) It was my insurance co. who ordered surveillance spell, to see the level of activity at my home. Which is fine, but I am not suppose to see them! I let her know the horribleness of it and how it could have been so bad. I even put my Lusterpig who loves me on the front porch with blankets! He hates visi...	debilyn	9	593	May 20, 2006 by maresie
	Potential for another drunken weekend (Preview) Hi, I haven't been on here for a while, but my AH has been working out of town A LOT of long hours so I really don't see him during the week. I usually talk to him during the week, but he has no time to get good and drunk. He comes home on the weekends and things have been okay for the most part. I am noticing that he...	Lindy	3	436	May 20, 2006 by gardengal
	Thanks for the ES&H (Preview) As I sit here this morning asking myself am I enabling.....maybe I'm doing the things I do for him to help myself........I don't want to feel like I just threw him away.........Also I think tIhis is one of the reasons I stayed so long........how do you just throw someone away that you love....I must hav...	Andrea12	3	925	May 19, 2006 by maresie
	SSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOO PO'd (Preview) My A did not respond to the letter I sent him on Monday. I woke up this morning crying. I sent him a text saying "I miss my sweet wonderful "A" :(. Are you ready to try again at a slower pace? I do love you" He did not respond. Instead of being sad and accepting the fact he has rejected me and left me hear...	jennneeefffurrr	5	554	May 19, 2006 by mebjk
	let go and let god (Preview) Hi Roomies, I'm having a little trouble with this one today. My A and I are in the middle of a law suit(malpractice). As far as i can tell it is my word against his the doctor. I did not lie on the stand I did my best to tell the story my way. I feel he lied alot. But now it is up...	nikkilou	5	514	May 19, 2006 by nikkilou
	slipping (Preview) my a husband called and left a message yesterday. the kids and i haven't seen him in 3 months. he hadn't called in a week. he is living with his mother and his brothers and sisters who all drink and do drugs. but the thing is he wants to see the kids. i told him last time that i would not allow the kids over to his...	serendipity	4	474	May 19, 2006 by Lunamoth
	One week...and deep in thought (Preview) It has been one week since I asked my H to leave. I hear in my head his voice "i can not be who you want me to be". I have to ask myself what it is that i wanted him to be...and it gives me healing, because i know all i was asking for was to be married to the man that i chose 13 yrs ago. I made a list....	Jennfer32	5	429	May 19, 2006 by aunitedway
	Learning to live side by side w/A husband while happily doing all the chores (Preview) Yup - this is what Im asking. To be able to live side by side with A husband and be able to happily do all the chores. Think its possible? He hasnt mowed the grass in years. Ive actually stopped the lawn man a few years ago. Why should we grow grass if Im the only one out there mowing it? I see all the neighbors...	Barbara	7	504	May 19, 2006 by twinmom2
	A letter to my husband (Preview) I wrote a letter to my husband today. I don't know that I will give it to him, but the message is heartfelt, and writing makes my head clearer....Thought I would share with those of you who feel the same way........ H, I think it is important for me to share with you a few of my thoughts as i go thro...	Jennfer32	4	466	May 19, 2006 by hudsond
	Hope for Today read wrong date but right message (Preview) I read Hope for today March 18th yesterday. I think my HP is trying to tell me something. I am working on that one. My A I think has been sober since the last week in April. I did find an empty bottle of wine in the trash. I thought about bringing it up but it is not that important & not my responsib...	hmrnrnmm	1	386	May 19, 2006 by hudsond
	Please somebody help me (Preview) I really need someone to talk to. I'm really scared, and freaked, and I'm so so confused. I don't know what to do. I just need someone to help me. Could someone come to a meeting to talk, or something? I just really need help. Mir	Miranda	4	488	May 19, 2006 by sandy w
	whats the difference when someone says "Its not all about you" to "Keep the focus on you"? (Preview) People say "Its not all about you". Program says "Keep the focus on you". How do you differentiate? Talk about the other person but keep thoughts on yourself? Difference btwn ppl in program and those no?	Barbara	6	5692	May 19, 2006 by sandy w
	2 days (Preview) It is amazing how seeing a glimpse of light can cause life to turn upside down. Sunday my ah decided to go back to meetings. He made 2 had 2 sober days. I am not certain, he didn't talk about it, but I think he used yesterday. I didn't want to ask if he had gone to a meeting, I felt lik...	hudsond	5	541	May 19, 2006 by sandy w
	Memo from God (Preview) Found this one in my files today, and always loved it..... As always, feel free to alter the word "God" to "God of my understanding", but the sentiment is right on the money.... Enjoy!! Tom MEMO FROM GOD To: YOU Date: TODAY From: THE BOSS Subject: YOURSELF Referenc...	canadianguy	5	631	May 19, 2006 by sandy w
	Prayers needed (Preview) Hello Roomies, My grandfather goes into surgery for a double bypass at 6:30am. Please pray for him. I love him so much. And I know he is in God's hands and that is such a comfort. But I still can't help but be scared that I am going to lose my hero. Thanks for your support. Much Love,	Dolphin123	10	443	May 19, 2006 by sandy w
	MY "A", broken heart - hopeful (Preview) I have not heard from my A since Fri afternoon of last week. I sent a letter to him Mon - not asking for an explanation, more letting him know I love him and will never turn my back on him and that I will love him forever, pray for him always, and hope for the best for a wonderful and worthwhile person......	jennneeefffurrr	11	796	May 19, 2006 by sparkette
	Brother called me tonight - said I'm needed to testify July 27th (Preview) He saved the emails from Jan/Feb. I called our mother controlling, etc. He doesnt see that having me testify may be detrimental to his case.	Barbara	1	450	May 18, 2006 by abbyal
	Bubble has burst (Preview) Yes the bubble has burst big time. I have walked out and have rented a flat at an address only my daughter knows. The lies he is telling people is beyond belief. I cant cope any more with his drinking, its a litre or more of vodka a day and I cant compete. I feel exhausted its been&...	penny	6	496	May 18, 2006 by Jennifer
	Reflections (Preview) Reflections are from the Forum(meeting in my pocket) People who practice what they preach usually do a minimum of preching.Forum 1973 When you are ready to go over the edge remeber that God,in his wisdom and mercy,made the world round.Forum 1994	angel123	2	452	May 18, 2006 by Jerry F
	Need Advice (Preview) Got a question on recovery? I haven't been coming to the board or this site very long. I am learning detachment which I am finding to be more difficult lately for me. I find myself when talking to him talking about future. I know I shouldn't be doing that "how do I stop from getting myself roped in...	angeleyes8462	4	499	May 18, 2006 by Jerry F
	alcohol research (Preview) For anyone who cares to read, there is a wealth of information on this site regarding research being done on the scientific effects of alcohol. www.utexas.edu/research/asrec/alcoholfacts.html MsPeewee	peewee	2	493	May 18, 2006 by kent_s
	My story--OUR story (Preview) I am a wife of an alcoholic. I married him when I was 22 yrs old, and he was my best friend. My saviour from a homelife with a bipolar mother. I was independent, strong, and determined at that time, and had the great wall of China built up around me, and brick by brick, he knocked i...	Jennfer32	8	647	May 18, 2006 by justme
	living a lie... (Preview) hi, i'm new to this. i've sat and read all the posts, and have found comfort and support in them. i responded to one because it felt like my life. i am 34 years old w/ 2 beautiful teenagers. i have been divorced for 7 years now. i have been w/ my partner for the last 6 years. when i met her she was just a b...	jecy	8	630	May 18, 2006 by aunitedway
	MIP Map (closed) (Preview) This site is not where you can endulge in outside issues or promote and advertise outside endeavors/causes. While what you are doing may be with good intent and seemingly harmless it is outside the scope of Al-Anon, is not endorsed by Al-Anon WSO, nor this Al-Anon WSO registered group's busin...	jrtjosey	0	513	May 18, 2006 by canadianguy
	Happy Anniversary????? (Preview) Hi all~ So, I have been separated for three weeks now and yesterday was our anniversary. Kind of awkward...we did go out last night just went and sat at a picnic table by the ocean and talked. I had a really nice night. It's funny how all of the little things I used to want to do (like t...	robyn76	2	436	May 18, 2006 by canadianguy
	replacing the anger (Preview) Ok so I am not suppose to express anger when he drinks..Stay calm I am told...focus on myself...but I am angry...yes it is a disease...he doesn't see the problem...if not anger then what acceptance? indifference? concern?....act like nothing is wrong...but the...	Elizabeth M	4	494	May 18, 2006 by Rita G
	tired of the attraction (Preview) To anyone out there; I am so tired of being the flashing, neon light for addicts I could scream. I feel like I am invisible to "normal" men, and that only those who have addiction issues see me in a crowd. It seem that the only men who are attacted to me are addicts in some form or fashion. Oh, I'...	helga	9	475	May 18, 2006 by donnajo
	SURVIVING! barely (Preview) I still have not tt my A since Fri afternoon. I cannot call him, he discarded me so harshly, I just cannot do it. I keep praying and releasing him to God and asking God to release me from loving him...what is the point if we are not going to be together? It was hard Saturday. Friday nights my A and I al...	jennneeefffurrr	10	648	May 18, 2006 by jennneeefffurrr
	Need guidance after years of denial (Preview) Hello, I am new to this Al-Anon site, but I was hoping that I could get some good advice and guidance in my time of desperate need. Never in my wildest imagination did I ever think that I would be living in the life that I am right now. It is one of desperation and hopelessness. Here is my story. I mar...	kimmy123	5	454	May 18, 2006 by Rita G
	My Mother's Day Poem (Preview) Funny that I should give myself such a gift on that wonderful day. I had my youngest daughter with me on a beautiful hike and while we sat near my favorite small, wonderous waterfall, she drew while I wrote. I think there is much to learn about giving ourselves joy and love so that is why I share it with my yo...	sparkette	5	470	May 18, 2006 by babysteps
	disjointed fractured family (Preview) Hi All, I'm new here. I am a middle aged Mom, happily married, recovered alcholic. I have five sisters and we are all the classic product of Alcoholic parents who destroyed their careers, marriage and for awhile, some of us. Of the six sisters, three of us beat the disease and live h...	foggy	3	594	May 18, 2006 by nycbt
	Thankful and Trying to be strong. (Preview) I am new to this site, and started a post earlier, trying to tell my story. I got nauseaous..dizzy...sick....typing my past out in this pure white window...i deleted it. I went on to read the posts here, and found that I didn't have to type anything, because so many someone'...	Jennfer32	2	375	May 18, 2006 by nycbt
	New to the board and frustrated (Preview) Hi everyone, I will start off with a quick introduction. My name is Dawn and I am from Ontario, Canada. I have been involved with Alanon for 2 years. I havent been to a meeting for a few months and im planning on attending one or more this week. My life is just in shambles right now. My common law went bac...	sweetr72	9	584	May 18, 2006 by nycbt
	advice please (Preview) sorry we do not give advice in Al-Anon, please join us in chat and we can offer our experience strength and hope to you in chat or here on the board if you just post your story and questions. Post edited for content. -- Edited by jrtjosey at 00:10, 2006-05-16	T47	4	413	May 18, 2006 by nycbt
	Simple reminders (Preview) Happy moments, praise God Difficult moments, seek God Quiet moments, worship God Painful moments, trust God Every moment, thank God Debbie	horselover58	7	429	May 18, 2006 by mel123
	Why can't I stop Enabling?? (Preview) Even though he is out of my home I still feel like I am enabling. He makes me feel bad for him, I know this is part of the con the game. Since he can not drive right now he calls me for everything, take me to the Dr. take me to the dentist......I need to just say no....One day I actually did...but mostly I jus...	Andrea12	6	820	May 17, 2006 by mac57
	feeling like I'm failing (Preview) I know it is only me that I'm failing. It is difficult to admit, the weakness ~ physically especially, I always had that to fall back on. Most girls can't lift 100# easily... now since I fell ill last year & the totalling of my car, I am so atrophied & weak, it is frustrating &a...	kitty	18	717	May 17, 2006 by mac57
	SPIRITUALITY WHAT DOES IT REALLY MEAN? (Preview) IN THE EARLY YRS IN AL- ANON THE WORD SPIRITUAL AWAKENING USED TO CONFUSE ME ALOT I DIDN'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT IT WAS . THEN I FOUND A ONE LINER THAT SIMPLY SAID A SPIRITUAL AWAKENING WAS AS SIMPLE AS HAVING A CHANGE IN ATTITUDE. (AND SUPRISE SUPRISE I HAD ACTUALLY HAD A FEW . HEHE OUR CO FOUN...	abbyal	6	531	May 17, 2006 by gardengal
	Question (Preview) Hello all, I have a question, which I suspect I know the answer to, but am going to ask nonetheless. Typically, I am not an emotional person (well, I suppose that's not entirely true, I do angry pretty well...). I guess what I mean is that I don't cry. Over the last few weeks, I hav...	kspear	3	462	May 17, 2006 by Jennifer
	I found the poem- "The Hole" check it out (Preview) The Hole One I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless... It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Two I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t belie...	justme	7	1644	May 17, 2006 by justme
	My Mothers Day Lessons...... (Preview) I know tomorrow is Mothers's Day and my kids are really special and I LOVE them with all my heart there is also a great sadness for my mom who killed herself 6 yrs ago and the pain of sadness I still feel knowing this dieases killed her!!!! I am finding that as the years pass and the more I am here in alanon that...	bubbles1990	9	486	May 17, 2006 by peewee
	Blue Flames (Preview) Do they burn out instantaneously or fade away slowly? I know you can see them from far away, that blue light they use at airports, so even a glint is enough, a tiny very hot spark. Turn inward to GOD, love, to learn to love myself & not feel the guilt of placing other's first... will it tak...	kitty	3	418	May 17, 2006 by peewee
	Snit, serenity for whom? (Preview) Hi there, It's great to come here and blow off steam. You don't even Have to listen, but I can pose a question to myself or anyone who cares to join in :) When hub gets fussy, interrrupts my talk, uptight, says close the door, fuss fuss, ewwwwwwwww, I get sarcastic, walk away, start sere...	peewee	4	425	May 17, 2006 by kent_s
	Instead of lying down I stood up for me (Preview) I have read in Alanon lit. that the spouses, parents, sibs, and children get so caught up in what the A is doing, their lives become unmanageable because the A and their behavior becomes their addiction and obsession. I obsess when my A has done something I don't like or if I have an issue I know I ne...	twinmom2	9	608	May 17, 2006 by April306
	Hi all Yes, lol I'm alive (Preview) Hi all, just checking in. Have heard people have been wondering where i was in the room so i thought i'd post real quick... I had surgery on the 10th, nothing serious, but nothing i wanted to share with the room with, kinda personal, and i didn't want to make everyone worry. They ha...	mastiff	7	541	May 17, 2006 by aunitedway
	Happiness versus JOY (Preview) Today I was asked to share in a forum on joy versus happiness. This is my take. Every day at least once, maybe 3 or 4 times my other half asks me if I am happy. Often I need to answer no. Sometimes that is not possible given the situation that we are living with. Joy on the other hand, almost always. Jo...	lilms	3	3135	May 17, 2006 by tea2
	One year of growth (Preview) Hello my friends old and new Yesterday marks 1 year since I left my A husband of 14 years. I have had such a good year of growth I just wanted to post and say how good my life has become. I have reconnected with my family. I traveled to the Netherlands to visit my...	megan	12	1355	May 17, 2006 by leo
	a little poem by mac (Preview) I wrote this in a share, in our mtg today; so i KNOW i didnt write it really, it was a gift to us, and so here it is: as i turn within myself it’s only love i find and as i find that love is true and that my love is mine my heart brings my joy to me and fills my ey...	mac57	19	692	May 17, 2006 by kitty
	Question? Do you like yourself and can you make mistakes without getting angry at yourself, realizing that you are human? (Preview) I pose this question, as so many times, so many of us alanoners beat ourselves up for reacting to an A's actions. I know time after time, after the fact, I would sit and cry and wonder why I said and did the things I did. After years of being told I was crazy I started to beleive that I was, because of my actions...	gardengal	7	460	May 16, 2006 by mebjk
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.