Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Fifi · Fifi

Hello everyone....I am back writing and feeling the need to really find comfort and understanding and awareness here. My 7 month sober BF of the past year and a half moved out for good 2 days ago. Well he is not sleeping here and all his things are in the basement....they too will be gone in a wwk or two...I...

cytagirl · cytagirl

I heard somewhere that alcoholism isn't a DISEASE , it's a DECISION . After 6 months of sobriety , why did my A b/f suddenly start drinking again .. It wasn't a physical craving , it was a psycological one surely ... In need of ESH here because i'm so confused , ...

tammy9462001 · tammy9462001

I am new here, i don't have anyone to talk to. I love my husband so much but he can't seem to stop drinking. He is not mean to me or our son but I feel so lonely . he does,nt understand how his drinking shuts me out. We made an agreement that I would lose weight and he would cut down on his drinking, i have los...

Dorothy · Dorothy

Hi guys, I found this on another website and thought you might like it. Quote:In order to let go of the uncontrollables and unchangeables in your life, you need to follow the words of the Prayer for Serenity by Reinhold Niebuhr. God grant me the serenity This requires that you establish a healthy spiri...

weggie · weggie

I have come to the end of my rope with my A. This weekend my son and his wife came in. The first thing my son said to me was "I see you and Dad are still not talking". Last weekend I learned that my A has a gambling problem along with his A. I have also learned that (as far as I know) he has drained so...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((Family))))), We just got back from the doctor and hubby received his medical clearance for his 2nd part of his surgery. All looks good. They will take the halo, the pins, the rods, the stitches and stables, etc out on Monday. They will then put a cast on and he has to leave that on until Septemb...

CriedOut2 · CriedOut2

I am really confused: My A husband is willing to talk about the weather, work, about someone's house repairs, etc. He will talk about almost anything except family issues or wanting to discuss us. We have been married for over 20 years but his drinking didn't get really bad until 5 years ago. He writ...

Maria123 · Maria123

I hope you all can make it. We've been having great meetings with very good attendance and have had some really healthy discussions and group conscience votes. AGENDA I. OPs Schedule II. Minutes Approval from June 3rd. III. Treasurer's Report IV. Old Business A. Rolling Scr...

mandalynn38 · mandalynn38

I have been away from the boards for a while.... I come back here from time to time to gain some insight on alanon. It has been a long journey for me to travel. But I believe I am catching on to the basics of the program. I am still in love with my A boyfriend. But it is not healthy for me to continue as it has been f...

Keme · Keme

I have been married to my AH for almost 3 yrs. This past Christmas I realized he was an A and told him so. He knew when we got married I didn't like alcohol much, and snuck out to buy it without my knowing for two years!! He would then drink it secretly. I started finding empty cans, which became empty hard liq...

pabell · pabell

I wish I could find a f2f tonight, but it's late and there isn't one....I keep replaying it in my mind...my brain is numb now.... I came home early to take our son to scouts, I missed the message that they canceled it due to the holiday tomorrow. So we started home. My son asked if he could get a taco, he was...

nagal · nagal

I am scared. I have been married to my husband for almost 7 years. I think he has been an alcolholic most of that but I have not admitted it to myself. His father and uncle are both hardcore alcoholics. I have written it off to him being young, to myself being too controlling etc. Now I realize that I was lyin...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))I was brought up with a drinker all my life. My dad, he is not like that today.(Thank Gawd), He can have a few drinks and be okay, his personality does not change nowadays. I no longer get anxious about his drinking. But for years my mind was a box of bad memories....

nagal · nagal

I wonder if anyone has tips for me on how to "handle" the lying / sneaking etc. My husband tells me that he is no longer drinking "during the week" but I know(for a fact) that he is drinking and hiding it from me. Do I tell him I know and get accused of "keeping track" or snea...

ally · ally

((((((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))))) I came across this and felt I would like to share it with you. This is something I feel we can all strugle with at some time in our lives....I hope you get something from it. Let Go: Let God Fill Your Need By Mary Kupferle If you are anxious, tense, or concerne...

serendipity · serendipity

As I was driving home from my meeting I was letting myself think thoughts that make me mad and sad. I stopped myself and thought "this is my disease". This is how I make myself miserable. No one else was in the car, just me, letting thoughts make me feel something I wasn't feeling. I was actual...

QOD · QOD

OMG - I cannot STOP obsessing today over my AH. I haven't seen or heard from him since he left the house Tuesday morning for work. Not a word. Now, you'd think that I'd be used to this as it has been his behavior for the last few years. Going off on his crack binges. The difference this time is that I have...

Christy · Christy

Hi (((family))) Am back from Anchorage and had a great time. Although it's such a loooooong trip. 12 hrs from my door step to hubby's. I don't want to do it again for a while. It was after 1 a.m my time when we got there, but only 10:00 there and broad daylight..lol That's so weird. It never does get da...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

From some of the Buddist texts. Continue your recovery, even if those you love continue in self destruction (something I am reminding myself alot lately...) Live in joy, In love, Even among those who hate. Live in joy, In health, Even among the afflicted. Live in joy, In peace, Even among the trouble...

Fifi · Fifi

hello all haven't written in some time.....full time with work,kids,home and managing my now sober live-in boyfriends' moods and my reaction to them ( or attempt not to). i asked him to move out today....after a year of him abusing himself and then 7 months of his sobriety. suprisingly not m...

mom1973 · mom1973

I am watching my daughter disolve before my own eyes. She has seriuos medical problems from her alchohol use and is living across town with people who took her in from the street. Her 12 year old son lives with me. I think she is also showing signs of mental illness. I thought about having her committed bu...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I am seeing little miracles going on around me and not quite sure how to process them other than thank God daily. Last night my AH (sober 5 mos) took our 14 yr old son to a youth group. When our son came home, the first thing he said to me was, "I am so proud of dad. We went to KFC after and I accidentally kn...

Diva · Diva

I didn't cause it. I cannot control it. I cannot cure it. I guess I need some ESH here because every time he goes off on a "vacation" I remember that he was 25 years sober until I came into his life. For the last 5 years I have lost all trust in him because of the drinking binges. I have got to the poin...

maresie2 · maresie2

I saw the A yesterday and came away feeling drained to death. He managed to absolutely bombard me with demands and manipulate me. I felt totally put upon, distressed and fed up. The norm. I have levelled with the people he is staying with. They are willing to work with me. I feel like I am going to...

Gurl25 · Gurl25

We were invited to a party last night and he we were both wanting to go, but then the anxiety set in when I though abt alcohol maybe being there - so I said "can you not drink?" "I'll just have a couple" YEAH RIGHT LOL!!!!! I'm not abt to put myself in a situation where I will look like th...

gimmpy · gimmpy

My daughters friend who was17 died of an over-dose, they decided to take him off life support, there was so little brain activity, he went without oxygen for too long. I talked to my daughter about getting help for her addiction, for the first time she didn't disagree. I have cried all the tears I think...

QOD · QOD

My AH left for work Tuesday morning and I haven't seen or heard from him since. I thought that he might show up Wed night so that he could get up and go to work today but he was a no show. Now I am figuring there is no telling when he will turn up this time. I am leaving for my vacation on the 14th and he was suppos...

Diva · Diva

He went out this afternoon and stayed about three hours. I think he has been drinking. He is avoiding me, because he knows I can detect it immediately. His voice has "that sound." I am convinced it will never end. OK, OK. Breathe. Keep myself calm and in order. I'll make it. Damn, I hat...

debilyn · debilyn

I rarely lose my temper. In fact it drove my A nuts how I delt with my anger so quitely. But after my diagnoses,and the diabetes med making me so sick, I was a B to two of my friends... geez. raving lunatic. Apologized to both. one has forgiven me, The other well I told her if she does not talk to me, I am heading...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

Who would have thunk? lol So after fireworks I called ah to see if he was sober so he could talk to the kids and he actually was. I asked how he managed to do that? and he said "the guys are out sitting by the fire drinking and I didn't want to be stupid and get drunk so I've stayed in my room all day" He...

Mamallama · Mamallama

I am new to this board but not to Al-Anon although it's been a couple of years since I went to a face-to-face meeting. I am really needing to start back with meetings and this will help in between. My AH is really sinking to the bottom but it's bringing me down. I can't let it but I am so depressed. We ar...

lin0606 · lin0606

Hi, I haven't been around too much lately - busy and sad time. My husband's cancer progressed faster than we expected it to, and he died last week. He died at home, just at the beginning of the journey we both dreaded - pain and incapacity, hospitals and tubes ... The last few weeks of his life had me as alm...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

(((Everyone)))) I just jumped on here because I had a twitch in the nerve between my eyebrow, so bad you could see it. Yep it's got to do with the A and I could vent away about what is going on but I was interupted by sirens which meant the start of our neighborhood parade. I love my neighborhood, and the pe...

ally · ally

((((((((((((((((MISS USA))))))))))))))))) I know how your feeling about your dog...I also let my wee jack russell go 3 years ago.. She was nearlly 15 years old.. I kept her for ME....and I finally had to make the "Hardest" decision of my life... I staye with her, looking into her wee eyes...

itsgot2bgd · itsgot2bgd

Hi friends, I heard this term on TV last night and read it one of the posts. What is "tweaking?" Since my H is recovering from addiction to prescription meds, I just like to be aware of the terms... just in case. thanks! hugs, Lee Ann

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

It has been almost a year since I moved out of the house and there is a one year waiting period for filing for divorce in NC. I am dirt poor and am wondering if anyone has any resources for attorneys who might possibly give a tidbit of direction in what I need to do to file for divorce. I am wanting to find out...

suzydawn · suzydawn

Hi. I'm actually new here. I found the site about a year ago but then never returned. My live in BF and father of my baby has been arrested 5 times for DUI over the course of his adult life (45yrs old). I met him while he was in "recovery" and on house arrest. He does not have a DL (lost for life...

camiliajojo · camiliajojo

I'm new to this forum. I attended Al-Anon maybe 4 years ago since I was with someone in NA. The past few years I've been with my best friend who is also in NA. He has 2 daughters I love madly and who love me too. We're getting married in September. He had three years clean when we met...but he relapsed last May...

serendipity · serendipity

My mom has a boyfriend who is an A. He goes to AA and does alot of service work but is in a constant state of relapse. My mom grew up in an A home and is untreated ADD. Anyway, they fight, that is what they do. She abuses him and he is mean to her. He is the most annoying, strange man anyone has ever met. I think it w...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((Family))))))), May you all have a wonderful, safe, and Happy 4th of July! May we take a moment to honor those who are serving in our armed forces, past and present. Love and blessings to you and your family. Live strong, Karilynn, Hubby, and Pipers Kitty

Maria123 · Maria123

You haven't gotten rid of me yet . This past month has had so many highs and lows and thanks to this program, I've been able to process the lows and cherish and enjoy the highs. I haven't been able to respond as much to other's post (which I love to do to keep my 12th step work in progress). Sadly enough, I had...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) Ive just returned home from a face to face open meeting. Al-Anon and AA. Shared top table. And It was fantastic, the feelings, emotions I got tonight were so unreal. To listen to an Al-anon female sharing her story, and then to listen to a male AA member sharing his s...

QOD · QOD

I love my family - my parents, my 2 older sisters and my younger brother.....but they are driving me nuts. We have a pretty close relationship, talk about everything and are wide open typically. But ever since my AH's addiction to crack came to light, I find that I am distancing myself from them. And I...

Becky1 · Becky1

Well, here I am in Kansas. Things are going pretty well with my Mom, I just have to go in the other room now and then and BREATHE!!! Too much togetherness right now. Today went with my sis to take the recycleables to the recycle bins, and to grocery. Had to get out of Mom's house for a while! She had me corn...

confused · confused

HI all, I have been getting a lot of backlash from my AH about my program and my coming to MIP. Don't know if he has read my posts but he does know my nick so I am going to change it. My new nick will be myturn. Thank you all for all of the support you have and continue to give me. Lynn

serendipity · serendipity

I first wanted to say that our entertainment industry lossed a great singer last night, beverly stiles. She made opera accesible and entertaing. She was the best soprano americahas ever produced. She will be missed. But don't they say that divas never die they just become the ledgend.....I guess I...

serendipity · serendipity

Someone said this at a meeting tonight. Because if you don't forgive, you can't detatch because you'll keep getting sucked back in. It made sense to me. Another good reason to forgive. My problem is my motive for forgiving. Last year when my A was relapsing I had so much compassion for him and his diseas...

gknee · gknee

Hi all- Just wanted to update on how things are going in my world. I looked back on my profile and saw that I have been a member here since March of 2005-- so much has happened since that time. I know that I could have never gotten thru it all without learning about alanon. My addict(alcohol and var...

realestatepup · realestatepup

Thanks to everyone who replied (and viewed) my posting about detaching. It's not what I thougt it was. Wierd, huh? I am a total hard-ass about certain things. One of those things is when people I am very close to and love relapse. Even though I have been sober for over three years, go to meetings, identif...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

I was surprised how my six year old spoke to him, both girls did. They said "dad, do you not like us anymore? Because you promised you would come this weekend and you didn't. You lied" I was like oh wooooooow! He said "it's a long story, I'll tell you later" and my daughter said &quo...

Kim65 · Kim65

I think yesterday I finally got some energy back. It's a weird feeling, feeling essentially good, reasonably hopeful, and yet having NO ENERGY. I have always had a hard time reading my body's messages to me, and accepting it's needs. So I'm chillin' in a nice clean house and get a call from the sheri...

david62 · david62

Hi (((((Family)))))) Well I did it! Yesterday evening I told my story for the first time at a Speaker Meeting. It was an amazing experience, I highly recommend it!! The meeting was in San Antonio about an hour and a half from where I live and I and some friends from my home group drove over. We went a little...

gimmpy · gimmpy

My daughter was camping out with friends, and they were all partying. She's 19 and another 18. Her other frined who is 17 over-dosed on cold medicine and is in a coma. His girl friend is only 15, so my daughter and the 18 were told taht they may be charged with endangering the wellfair of a minor. She"...

confused · confused

Boundaries are a great thing, but what if they are not respected. So what happens when they are not respected. Wouldn't it be great if we set a boundary and the A actually agreed to it. I have been on a long road with my AH and feel as though I am nearing an end, at least to the road I have been on. I spoke to a...

Gurl25 · Gurl25

I need some opinions / experiences any of you've had in this regard: My emotions are off the wall. Sometimes I think that I need help, medication, something. But then I think, there's no possible way this is going to be helped as long as I'm with AH or at least as long as he's still in the throws of Aism. I'm e...

Diva · Diva

A few days ago, in a post of mine, I responded in a rather unkind way to your reply to me. Looking back, I know I took your answer all wrong, and read into it that which was not intended to be there. I am sorry. Best wishes, Diva -- Edited by Diva at 22:42, 2007-06-30

Becky1 · Becky1

Well, only for a week to see my mom in another state. The A is not going, I will be 900 miles away. We have not made love in almost 2 months. He's not seeing anyone else, he is always home, or just across the street with his A friend (and his wife.) This morning, I laid in bed when I should have been up, hoping t...

DT1221 · DT1221

Hello (((Everyone))). I am in Great need of some EH&S today. My mind is taking over and all I want to do is cry. i know this is not a bad thing as it helps to cleanse the soul but I need to get through my day. My dilemna is that now that my A is in AA and making all kinds of new female and male friends. I feel left...

gardengal · gardengal

I can remember the days when I couldnt say "no" even though I didnt want to do a particular thing. I was a people pleaser and sometimes still am. I wanted people to count on me, I wanted to be the one they came to with problems , and you know I thought I knew all the solutions. Barely even knowing...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

I adore so many people here but I wanted to say out loud how much I appreciate Twinmom. She's pretty much in my boat and understand and she takes the time to make sure I am ok. She's just really special. That's why this board isn't like any other. People genuinly care about one another and even though we do n...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	first days...again (Preview) Hello everyone....I am back writing and feeling the need to really find comfort and understanding and awareness here. My 7 month sober BF of the past year and a half moved out for good 2 days ago. Well he is not sleeping here and all his things are in the basement....they too will be gone in a wwk or two...I...	Fifi	3	483	Jul 8, 2007 by Lunamoth
	I dont get it !!! (Preview) I heard somewhere that alcoholism isn't a DISEASE , it's a DECISION . After 6 months of sobriety , why did my A b/f suddenly start drinking again .. It wasn't a physical craving , it was a psycological one surely ... In need of ESH here because i'm so confused , ...	cytagirl	16	837	Jul 8, 2007 by Jamekaticy
	I hurt so bad... (Preview) I am new here, i don't have anyone to talk to. I love my husband so much but he can't seem to stop drinking. He is not mean to me or our son but I feel so lonely . he does,nt understand how his drinking shuts me out. We made an agreement that I would lose weight and he would cut down on his drinking, i have los...	tammy9462001	6	640	Jul 8, 2007 by tammy9462001
	one version of the Serenity Prayer (Preview) Hi guys, I found this on another website and thought you might like it. Quote:In order to let go of the uncontrollables and unchangeables in your life, you need to follow the words of the Prayer for Serenity by Reinhold Niebuhr. God grant me the serenity This requires that you establish a healthy spiri...	Dorothy	0	462	Jul 8, 2007 by Dorothy
	The secret is out (Preview) I have come to the end of my rope with my A. This weekend my son and his wife came in. The first thing my son said to me was "I see you and Dad are still not talking". Last weekend I learned that my A has a gambling problem along with his A. I have also learned that (as far as I know) he has drained so...	weggie	2	461	Jul 8, 2007 by Maria123
	Prayers for Hubby please! (Preview) (((((((Family))))), We just got back from the doctor and hubby received his medical clearance for his 2nd part of his surgery. All looks good. They will take the halo, the pins, the rods, the stitches and stables, etc out on Monday. They will then put a cast on and he has to leave that on until Septemb...	Karilynn	22	733	Jul 8, 2007 by tiredtonite
	Do A's ever care about their spouses? (Preview) I am really confused: My A husband is willing to talk about the weather, work, about someone's house repairs, etc. He will talk about almost anything except family issues or wanting to discuss us. We have been married for over 20 years but his drinking didn't get really bad until 5 years ago. He writ...	CriedOut2	15	919	Jul 8, 2007 by shoo
	July 8th Agenda - 9 p.m. Daylight Savings Time (Preview) I hope you all can make it. We've been having great meetings with very good attendance and have had some really healthy discussions and group conscience votes. AGENDA I. OPs Schedule II. Minutes Approval from June 3rd. III. Treasurer's Report IV. Old Business A. Rolling Scr...	Maria123	0	352	Jul 7, 2007 by Maria123
	Missing My Program (Preview) I have been away from the boards for a while.... I come back here from time to time to gain some insight on alanon. It has been a long journey for me to travel. But I believe I am catching on to the basics of the program. I am still in love with my A boyfriend. But it is not healthy for me to continue as it has been f...	mandalynn38	3	440	Jul 7, 2007 by Lunamoth
	Learning to trust again (Preview) I have been married to my AH for almost 3 yrs. This past Christmas I realized he was an A and told him so. He knew when we got married I didn't like alcohol much, and snuck out to buy it without my knowing for two years!! He would then drink it secretly. I started finding empty cans, which became empty hard liq...	Keme	2	599	Jul 7, 2007 by Lunamoth
	shock (Preview) I wish I could find a f2f tonight, but it's late and there isn't one....I keep replaying it in my mind...my brain is numb now.... I came home early to take our son to scouts, I missed the message that they canceled it due to the holiday tomorrow. So we started home. My son asked if he could get a taco, he was...	pabell	12	702	Jul 7, 2007 by carolena
	mom of two babies scared (Preview) I am scared. I have been married to my husband for almost 7 years. I think he has been an alcolholic most of that but I have not admitted it to myself. His father and uncle are both hardcore alcoholics. I have written it off to him being young, to myself being too controlling etc. Now I realize that I was lyin...	nagal	12	661	Jul 7, 2007 by lin0606
	HAD A GOOD MEMORY FROM CHILDHOOD (Preview) (((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))I was brought up with a drinker all my life. My dad, he is not like that today.(Thank Gawd), He can have a few drinks and be okay, his personality does not change nowadays. I no longer get anxious about his drinking. But for years my mind was a box of bad memories....	ally	1	615	Jul 7, 2007 by david62
	how am I supposed to react? (Preview) I wonder if anyone has tips for me on how to "handle" the lying / sneaking etc. My husband tells me that he is no longer drinking "during the week" but I know(for a fact) that he is drinking and hiding it from me. Do I tell him I know and get accused of "keeping track" or snea...	nagal	11	821	Jul 7, 2007 by Diva
	LET GO AND LET GOD (Preview) ((((((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))))) I came across this and felt I would like to share it with you. This is something I feel we can all strugle with at some time in our lives....I hope you get something from it. Let Go: Let God Fill Your Need By Mary Kupferle If you are anxious, tense, or concerne...	ally	4	3870	Jul 7, 2007 by nagal
	My disease, My program (Preview) As I was driving home from my meeting I was letting myself think thoughts that make me mad and sad. I stopped myself and thought "this is my disease". This is how I make myself miserable. No one else was in the car, just me, letting thoughts make me feel something I wasn't feeling. I was actual...	serendipity	4	533	Jul 6, 2007 by Lunamoth
	I am obsessing!! (Preview) OMG - I cannot STOP obsessing today over my AH. I haven't seen or heard from him since he left the house Tuesday morning for work. Not a word. Now, you'd think that I'd be used to this as it has been his behavior for the last few years. Going off on his crack binges. The difference this time is that I have...	QOD	5	644	Jul 6, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Alaska pics (Preview) Hi (((family))) Am back from Anchorage and had a great time. Although it's such a loooooong trip. 12 hrs from my door step to hubby's. I don't want to do it again for a while. It was after 1 a.m my time when we got there, but only 10:00 there and broad daylight..lol That's so weird. It never does get da...	Christy	6	617	Jul 6, 2007 by lilms
	Continue your recovery (Preview) From some of the Buddist texts. Continue your recovery, even if those you love continue in self destruction (something I am reminding myself alot lately...) Live in joy, In love, Even among those who hate. Live in joy, In health, Even among the afflicted. Live in joy, In peace, Even among the trouble...	Tiger2006	2	381	Jul 6, 2007 by Fifi
	help in the next stage (Preview) hello all haven't written in some time.....full time with work,kids,home and managing my now sober live-in boyfriends' moods and my reaction to them ( or attempt not to). i asked him to move out today....after a year of him abusing himself and then 7 months of his sobriety. suprisingly not m...	Fifi	9	667	Jul 6, 2007 by Fifi
	I'm so scared (Preview) I am watching my daughter disolve before my own eyes. She has seriuos medical problems from her alchohol use and is living across town with people who took her in from the street. Her 12 year old son lives with me. I think she is also showing signs of mental illness. I thought about having her committed bu...	mom1973	10	714	Jul 6, 2007 by nagal
	Little Miracles.... (Preview) I am seeing little miracles going on around me and not quite sure how to process them other than thank God daily. Last night my AH (sober 5 mos) took our 14 yr old son to a youth group. When our son came home, the first thing he said to me was, "I am so proud of dad. We went to KFC after and I accidentally kn...	Loupiness	4	560	Jul 6, 2007 by canadianguy
	I keep repeating the 3 Cs.... (Preview) I didn't cause it. I cannot control it. I cannot cure it. I guess I need some ESH here because every time he goes off on a "vacation" I remember that he was 25 years sober until I came into his life. For the last 5 years I have lost all trust in him because of the drinking binges. I have got to the poin...	Diva	18	1958	Jul 6, 2007 by ShelBell
	Absolutely bombarded (Preview) I saw the A yesterday and came away feeling drained to death. He managed to absolutely bombard me with demands and manipulate me. I felt totally put upon, distressed and fed up. The norm. I have levelled with the people he is staying with. They are willing to work with me. I feel like I am going to...	maresie2	5	603	Jul 6, 2007 by maresie2
	More pointless fighting... (Preview) We were invited to a party last night and he we were both wanting to go, but then the anxiety set in when I though abt alcohol maybe being there - so I said "can you not drink?" "I'll just have a couple" YEAH RIGHT LOL!!!!! I'm not abt to put myself in a situation where I will look like th...	Gurl25	8	564	Jul 6, 2007 by Gurl25
	can't sleep, I feel numb. (Preview) My daughters friend who was17 died of an over-dose, they decided to take him off life support, there was so little brain activity, he went without oxygen for too long. I talked to my daughter about getting help for her addiction, for the first time she didn't disagree. I have cried all the tears I think...	gimmpy	13	606	Jul 5, 2007 by debilyn
	I am feeling high levels of anxiety today! (Preview) My AH left for work Tuesday morning and I haven't seen or heard from him since. I thought that he might show up Wed night so that he could get up and go to work today but he was a no show. Now I am figuring there is no telling when he will turn up this time. I am leaving for my vacation on the 14th and he was suppos...	QOD	11	678	Jul 5, 2007 by debilyn
	It has been a little more than a year... (Preview) He went out this afternoon and stayed about three hours. I think he has been drinking. He is avoiding me, because he knows I can detect it immediately. His voice has "that sound." I am convinced it will never end. OK, OK. Breathe. Keep myself calm and in order. I'll make it. Damn, I hat...	Diva	4	580	Jul 5, 2007 by gardengal
	I need to be slapped.... (Preview) I rarely lose my temper. In fact it drove my A nuts how I delt with my anger so quitely. But after my diagnoses,and the diabetes med making me so sick, I was a B to two of my friends... geez. raving lunatic. Apologized to both. one has forgiven me, The other well I told her if she does not talk to me, I am heading...	debilyn	4	515	Jul 5, 2007 by Friendofyours
	What?? 4th of July and sober? (Preview) Who would have thunk? lol So after fireworks I called ah to see if he was sober so he could talk to the kids and he actually was. I asked how he managed to do that? and he said "the guys are out sitting by the fire drinking and I didn't want to be stupid and get drunk so I've stayed in my room all day" He...	Friendofyours	3	579	Jul 5, 2007 by Friendofyours
	I am new here (Preview) I am new to this board but not to Al-Anon although it's been a couple of years since I went to a face-to-face meeting. I am really needing to start back with meetings and this will help in between. My AH is really sinking to the bottom but it's bringing me down. I can't let it but I am so depressed. We ar...	Mamallama	9	638	Jul 5, 2007 by QOD
	Update (Preview) Hi, I haven't been around too much lately - busy and sad time. My husband's cancer progressed faster than we expected it to, and he died last week. He died at home, just at the beginning of the journey we both dreaded - pain and incapacity, hospitals and tubes ... The last few weeks of his life had me as alm...	lin0606	26	754	Jul 5, 2007 by Rita G
	Venting... well maybe not (Preview) (((Everyone)))) I just jumped on here because I had a twitch in the nerve between my eyebrow, so bad you could see it. Yep it's got to do with the A and I could vent away about what is going on but I was interupted by sirens which meant the start of our neighborhood parade. I love my neighborhood, and the pe...	Lunamoth	3	477	Jul 5, 2007 by Maria123
	FOR MISS USA (AKA MARIA) (Preview) ((((((((((((((((MISS USA))))))))))))))))) I know how your feeling about your dog...I also let my wee jack russell go 3 years ago.. She was nearlly 15 years old.. I kept her for ME....and I finally had to make the "Hardest" decision of my life... I staye with her, looking into her wee eyes...	ally	1	460	Jul 5, 2007 by Maria123
	quick ? : What is (Preview) Hi friends, I heard this term on TV last night and read it one of the posts. What is "tweaking?" Since my H is recovering from addiction to prescription meds, I just like to be aware of the terms... just in case. thanks! hugs, Lee Ann	itsgot2bgd	6	517	Jul 5, 2007 by itsgot2bgd
	It's about that time... (Preview) It has been almost a year since I moved out of the house and there is a one year waiting period for filing for divorce in NC. I am dirt poor and am wondering if anyone has any resources for attorneys who might possibly give a tidbit of direction in what I need to do to file for divorce. I am wanting to find out...	carolinagirl	6	474	Jul 5, 2007 by QOD
	What do you think? (Preview) Hi. I'm actually new here. I found the site about a year ago but then never returned. My live in BF and father of my baby has been arrested 5 times for DUI over the course of his adult life (45yrs old). I met him while he was in "recovery" and on house arrest. He does not have a DL (lost for life...	suzydawn	10	632	Jul 5, 2007 by suzydawn
	if you want to make god laugh, make plans for the future (Preview) I'm new to this forum. I attended Al-Anon maybe 4 years ago since I was with someone in NA. The past few years I've been with my best friend who is also in NA. He has 2 daughters I love madly and who love me too. We're getting married in September. He had three years clean when we met...but he relapsed last May...	camiliajojo	2	930	Jul 5, 2007 by debilyn
	my mother and her "friend" (Preview) My mom has a boyfriend who is an A. He goes to AA and does alot of service work but is in a constant state of relapse. My mom grew up in an A home and is untreated ADD. Anyway, they fight, that is what they do. She abuses him and he is mean to her. He is the most annoying, strange man anyone has ever met. I think it w...	serendipity	2	613	Jul 4, 2007 by wp
	HAPPY 4TH OF JULY! (Preview) (((((((Family))))))), May you all have a wonderful, safe, and Happy 4th of July! May we take a moment to honor those who are serving in our armed forces, past and present. Love and blessings to you and your family. Live strong, Karilynn, Hubby, and Pipers Kitty	Karilynn	5	453	Jul 4, 2007 by DeeDee
	Just in case you were wondering ........... (Preview) You haven't gotten rid of me yet . This past month has had so many highs and lows and thanks to this program, I've been able to process the lows and cherish and enjoy the highs. I haven't been able to respond as much to other's post (which I love to do to keep my 12th step work in progress). Sadly enough, I had...	Maria123	8	686	Jul 4, 2007 by wp
	ALCOHOL OR NOT, ARE WE SO DIFFERENT (Preview) (((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) Ive just returned home from a face to face open meeting. Al-Anon and AA. Shared top table. And It was fantastic, the feelings, emotions I got tonight were so unreal. To listen to an Al-anon female sharing her story, and then to listen to a male AA member sharing his s...	ally	1	559	Jul 4, 2007 by serendipity
	My family is driving me crazy!!! (Preview) I love my family - my parents, my 2 older sisters and my younger brother.....but they are driving me nuts. We have a pretty close relationship, talk about everything and are wide open typically. But ever since my AH's addiction to crack came to light, I find that I am distancing myself from them. And I...	QOD	9	669	Jul 4, 2007 by Gurl25
	I'm In OZ! (Preview) Well, here I am in Kansas. Things are going pretty well with my Mom, I just have to go in the other room now and then and BREATHE!!! Too much togetherness right now. Today went with my sis to take the recycleables to the recycle bins, and to grocery. Had to get out of Mom's house for a while! She had me corn...	Becky1	2	520	Jul 4, 2007 by ally
	new identity (Preview) HI all, I have been getting a lot of backlash from my AH about my program and my coming to MIP. Don't know if he has read my posts but he does know my nick so I am going to change it. My new nick will be myturn. Thank you all for all of the support you have and continue to give me. Lynn	confused	6	568	Jul 4, 2007 by Diva
	goodbye to bubbles off topic (Preview) I first wanted to say that our entertainment industry lossed a great singer last night, beverly stiles. She made opera accesible and entertaing. She was the best soprano americahas ever produced. She will be missed. But don't they say that divas never die they just become the ledgend.....I guess I...	serendipity	3	474	Jul 4, 2007 by Diva
	I have to forgive to detatch? (Preview) Someone said this at a meeting tonight. Because if you don't forgive, you can't detatch because you'll keep getting sucked back in. It made sense to me. Another good reason to forgive. My problem is my motive for forgiving. Last year when my A was relapsing I had so much compassion for him and his diseas...	serendipity	12	855	Jul 4, 2007 by DeeDee
	patience pays off (Preview) Hi all- Just wanted to update on how things are going in my world. I looked back on my profile and saw that I have been a member here since March of 2005-- so much has happened since that time. I know that I could have never gotten thru it all without learning about alanon. My addict(alcohol and var...	gknee	6	578	Jul 4, 2007 by Karilynn
	Starting to understand (Preview) Thanks to everyone who replied (and viewed) my posting about detaching. It's not what I thougt it was. Wierd, huh? I am a total hard-ass about certain things. One of those things is when people I am very close to and love relapse. Even though I have been sober for over three years, go to meetings, identif...	realestatepup	2	548	Jul 3, 2007 by realestatepup
	He talked to the kids. (Preview) I was surprised how my six year old spoke to him, both girls did. They said "dad, do you not like us anymore? Because you promised you would come this weekend and you didn't. You lied" I was like oh wooooooow! He said "it's a long story, I'll tell you later" and my daughter said &quo...	Friendofyours	1	373	Jul 3, 2007 by QOD
	Three for three (Preview) I think yesterday I finally got some energy back. It's a weird feeling, feeling essentially good, reasonably hopeful, and yet having NO ENERGY. I have always had a hard time reading my body's messages to me, and accepting it's needs. So I'm chillin' in a nice clean house and get a call from the sheri...	Kim65	9	638	Jul 3, 2007 by Kim65
	Yep, "The Screw" made an appearance (Preview) Hi (((((Family)))))) Well I did it! Yesterday evening I told my story for the first time at a Speaker Meeting. It was an amazing experience, I highly recommend it!! The meeting was in San Antonio about an hour and a half from where I live and I and some friends from my home group drove over. We went a little...	david62	11	1014	Jul 3, 2007 by gardengal
	scared! (Preview) My daughter was camping out with friends, and they were all partying. She's 19 and another 18. Her other frined who is 17 over-dosed on cold medicine and is in a coma. His girl friend is only 15, so my daughter and the 18 were told taht they may be charged with endangering the wellfair of a minor. She"...	gimmpy	7	499	Jul 3, 2007 by gardengal
	boundaries...great concept but not always effective...back to the drawing board (Preview) Boundaries are a great thing, but what if they are not respected. So what happens when they are not respected. Wouldn't it be great if we set a boundary and the A actually agreed to it. I have been on a long road with my AH and feel as though I am nearing an end, at least to the road I have been on. I spoke to a...	confused	5	566	Jul 3, 2007 by lin0606
	Emotions (Preview) I need some opinions / experiences any of you've had in this regard: My emotions are off the wall. Sometimes I think that I need help, medication, something. But then I think, there's no possible way this is going to be helped as long as I'm with AH or at least as long as he's still in the throws of Aism. I'm e...	Gurl25	7	565	Jul 3, 2007 by Gurl25
	Apologies to gardengal. (Preview) A few days ago, in a post of mine, I responded in a rather unkind way to your reply to me. Looking back, I know I took your answer all wrong, and read into it that which was not intended to be there. I am sorry. Best wishes, Diva -- Edited by Diva at 22:42, 2007-06-30	Diva	3	496	Jul 3, 2007 by gardengal
	Leaving (Preview) Well, only for a week to see my mom in another state. The A is not going, I will be 900 miles away. We have not made love in almost 2 months. He's not seeing anyone else, he is always home, or just across the street with his A friend (and his wife.) This morning, I laid in bed when I should have been up, hoping t...	Becky1	9	601	Jul 3, 2007 by suzydawn
	looking for some EH&S to get me by (Preview) Hello (((Everyone))). I am in Great need of some EH&S today. My mind is taking over and all I want to do is cry. i know this is not a bad thing as it helps to cleanse the soul but I need to get through my day. My dilemna is that now that my A is in AA and making all kinds of new female and male friends. I feel left...	DT1221	7	734	Jul 3, 2007 by DT1221
	Can you say "No", and leave it as just an answer? (Preview) I can remember the days when I couldnt say "no" even though I didnt want to do a particular thing. I was a people pleaser and sometimes still am. I wanted people to count on me, I wanted to be the one they came to with problems , and you know I thought I knew all the solutions. Barely even knowing...	gardengal	10	981	Jul 3, 2007 by Karilynn
	Twinmom (Preview) I adore so many people here but I wanted to say out loud how much I appreciate Twinmom. She's pretty much in my boat and understand and she takes the time to make sure I am ok. She's just really special. That's why this board isn't like any other. People genuinly care about one another and even though we do n...	Friendofyours	2	477	Jul 3, 2007 by Alanoner
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.