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dislike holidays
(Preview)
Hi, I am trying to stay strong. The relatives the friends, I have to watch how and what I say. My husbands mom had a stroke on Thurs.One relative called tonight, will be over Wed Thurs and dont know how long will stay on Friday. This person is a heavy smoker, drinker. I made the MISTAKE of saying "can...
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spirit
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9
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403
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New to Talk
(Preview)
I am new to message boards but if I don't at least type what I am feeling I think I'm going to explode. I have lived with an alcoholic for so long I'm not sure what is normal anymore. I think I will just talk to myself while I talk so I can make sense of what I am feeling. You all can read and listen if you like. I...
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Paws
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2
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364
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Face to face meeting
(Preview)
Well I walked into my first al-anon meeting room last night. Actually - I should say it was the first time I have been in an al-anon room in 11 years. Wow. I've been in a lot of those rooms in my lifetime - even used to chair meetings, etc. But it's been 11 years since I've been there last. And there they w...
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round3
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2
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397
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Relapse is the pits....
(Preview)
I should be sleeping now instead of writing this, but maybe if I get it down and out of my head Ill be able to go to sleep a lot of it is about my AH, not me, but Im trying to change how I react, so a little background might help. I left my AH last year; still waiting for the divorce to be final. He was thrown out of...
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lmw
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3
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320
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feel like my son has died
(Preview)
Hello, I am brand new here. I am feeling such guilt and grief and had no where else to turn, then I found this site. Just a little background.....my son went off the college 2 years ago and recently moved back home to finish school in our town. I had no idea that he had such a drinking problem until he moved ba...
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mykidsmom
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8
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590
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Need Help Getting in Meeting Room
(Preview)
Hello, anyone out there? It has been months I've tried to get in the rooms, since my laptop was infected and my son fixed it. Again, since then, I only get a lined box shape with a very small X in the upper left corner of that "box" which is all blank. I have also tried to go through MIRC, again,...
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Grace7
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2
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337
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On the roller coaster playing dodge ball
(Preview)
Ok, this is a looonnnnggg holiday with all the kids home from schools & AH on vacation from work. Up and down, dodging balls that I feel are zipping right at me. The sinking feelings that could have made me sad as change happens, expressed in a way of gratitude earlier really helped me to look a...
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ddub
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6
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391
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Physical, Emotional & Spiritual
(Preview)
We often hear in this program that we need to take care of the physical, emotional & spiritual well being to become whole. I started that journey many years ago by walking through the doors of Alanon. It was the start of trusting anyone again. I started from the ground up so to speak because I was...
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AlaMom
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4
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707
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My Mom
(Preview)
Hi all, Last nite in chatroom I told ya'll my sis had my 81 yr old Mom in the ER . Well, it's her gall bladder, it's full of stones. She has COPD and emphasema and can't have surgery, so they're going to try to help her with medicine. I hope they can and it doesn't burst. She wanted to go home my sis said, but she c...
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jonibaloni21
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9
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445
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Major case of denial
(Preview)
When the alcoholic in my life was drinking openly and frequently it was easy for me to accept that he was an alcoholic and easy for me to come to Alanon and feel like I needed to be here. I felt like I was making progress, accepting things and trying to better myself. Now that I am back with the A in my life and h...
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KateAussie
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11
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608
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0 degrees
(Preview)
Good morn Alanoners and Happy Holidays. Thanks for being there 24/7 with your esh and pm's. Actually it is now minus 10 degrees and a beautiful winter scene out my window. I have to work on seeing things for what they are and accepting what is. When it is degrees or less you can't run and have to accept wha...
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nmike
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3
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550
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Just a long vent
(Preview)
My ex didn't show for his last visitation. It was the day before Christmas eve. We have 3rd part supervised visitation by an agency. The girls, all on their own, had bought a little gift for him and wrapped it. And he didn't show. They were hurt and disappointed. I think my 13 yr old was not that surprised,...
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serendipity
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5
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329
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Merry Christmas & Happy New Year from Me & My Girls
(Preview)
https://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj272/bentonwife/STA70133.jpg https://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj272/bentonwife/STA70022-1.jpg Merry Christmas from me and my two precious granddaughters, ages 3 and 1 month! Love in Recovery, Becky1 -- Edited by Becky1 at 08:24, 2007-12...
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Becky1
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5
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1049
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Frieds
(Preview)
The key past the m is messed up so I will have a missig letter i my posts. ha Oe of the other posts metioed usig the term frieds to cotrol. How is that? My A calls me his best fried all the time. Hope you ca uderstad with my missig key.
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Codependent
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7
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502
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Being honest about feelings
(Preview)
I couldn't hit a wall with a six-gun, but I can twirl one. It looks good. --John Wayne Many of us fake emotions because our past experiences never taught us how to use boundaries when dealing with feelings. Now we are oftentimes stumped when it comes to knowing how we should feel or act when we are faced w...
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Tiger2006
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4
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618
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gratitude helps?
(Preview)
I feel uncomfortable and I have a choice to feel worse or try to feel better. Maybe this place is rubbing off on me (hooray!! ) but I guess gratitude helps? College kids on break are even more independent and have less time for me so I am thankful they are growing & going plus maybe not so worried about...
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ddub
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3
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429
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CHRISTMAS WISH, COME TRUE :)
(Preview)
((((((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))))))) Hope you all had a "quiet" and "happy" Christmas, and are still feeling the "serenity" of the season. I've not been on here for a while, I still keep in touch with the board, and watch whats going on. Today I wanted you...
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ally
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2
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334
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The End
(Preview)
Well, we admitted my A BF into Hospice yesterday afternoon. I am just waiting to receive the telephone call that he has passed away. I am relieved, sad, hurt, numb and angry all at the same time. I wrote him a goodbye letter and read it to him. I believe in my heart that he did hear every single word I sa...
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Mariedl05
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13
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690
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Finding the courage to go on
(Preview)
I am married to a woman with a growing alcohol problem but who is firmly in denial despite being hospitalised twice (i.e. sectioned) and having had numerous run-ins with the police. She's even spent time in a state facility but still refuses to believe that there is anything wrong. I'm now fighting to...
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fco1922
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5
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597
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Prayers for MIP family
(Preview)
((((((Family))))))), With all the extreme weather going on, just wanted to let know that I'm keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. I've been thinking about all of you when I see the hurricanes, the extreme heat, the floods, etc. Hope you all are safe and sound. Please be careful out there. I w...
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Karilynn
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2
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389
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Having second thoughts....
(Preview)
My ahsober is taking our three kids on a snow trip today. I bowed out a few weeks ago because he was being a jerk and I felt it was the right thing to do (and it still is), but not because I wanted too, and it hurts. Went into Christmas with no expectations and was pleasantly surprised to have ah include himse...
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Loupiness
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12
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377
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being heard
(Preview)
I am grateful to those who read my pitiful post Christmas Day and took the time from your own lives to respond. I needed everything and still do. I made it through 5 hours of sleep last night, got up this morning, showered and dressed. That is a start. Husband ill and we must try to see his doctor today AGAI...
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omajoy
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6
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453
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If you are NOT really having a merry Xmas, its OK....
(Preview)
Jean here keeping it real. Lots of happy this and merry that which is all fine and good and appreciated but for those who are not really feeling all that happy and merry, here is a small humble note from me who is not feeling all that merry and/or happy either. But that does not mean I am not grateful. I am a-o...
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Jean4444
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5
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374
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The best gift ever...
(Preview)
The gift of your acceptance of me, and I of you. Thank you Heartbroken
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Heartbroken
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4
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499
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Grief and Relief
(Preview)
I've been thinking about this sort of thing a lot, as we go through the first Christmas without my husband. In some ways I am so full of grief, missing him so bad. In other ways, it is so nice not to have his moods and instability to deal with. I do not miss the uncertainty of life with him - even with four ye...
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lin0606
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4
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454
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So glad this day is over, vent
(Preview)
I've always been a holiday fanatic, especially Christmas. I'm the type that has house and yard decorations for each season/holiday. A and I were having problems after Thanksgiving so I put up the tree and a minimal amount of decorations this year. I was too tired, and zapped of good energy to do muc...
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texasproud2005
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9
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608
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I guess it's normal
(Preview)
I went out last night with a friend. The only place that stays open on Sunday is the casino, so we gave it a go. I don't gamble, all I could do really was analyze everything from the second I went in the door to the second I left. That place weirds me out. The pressure to buy and drink alcohol is so severe, it see...
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RainyJamie
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3
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529
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Old Topics/NEW OUTLOOK!!!
(Preview)
Dear Al-Anon Family, I am spending my day today, (actually the past 3 days & nights) going back to the very beginning of posts (#236), and reading the Topics that are "catching my eyes" to read. I do not observe this holiday...and I will just leav...
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afmom03
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4
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478
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still around.....
(Preview)
((((((MIP group)))))) Just wanted to say I wish peace and love to everyone at MIP during this season and always. I haven't posted for a long time but I still come here often and pop in meetings sometimes. This group has been very important in my recovery and I am grateful for every one of you.So many new fa...
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drucilla06
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5
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462
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To the child in all of us...
(Preview)
http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,1697456,00.html
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Tiger2006
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2
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276
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Gratitude.....OF COURSE!!
(Preview)
Aloha Al-Anon Ohana and Mele Kalikimaka!! (family) (Merry Christmas) It's abit after midnight this Christmas morning and the pups are surely waiting for Poppa to come to bed so they can snuggle. Two little gratitudes. Just wanted to share that We spent the 21st, 22n...
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Jerry F
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7
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474
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A Family Members Birthday!
(Preview)
Today is David62s Birthday! Wishes ((((( David ))))) for a Very Happy Birthday! Love, Care and Hugs -- Edited by tea2 at 11:45, 2007-12-22
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tea2
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22
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645
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Happy Holidays/Merry Christmas
(Preview)
I want to wish all my dear Al-anon family a wonderful holiday! I told you all i'm an Elf; LOL here is the proof. Please have a side splitting laugh on me! Love you All Roxie345 aka RoxieElf
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Roxie345
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7
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277
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What is choice & what is disease?
(Preview)
We had Christmas Eve party with A's family- that is my child & I. The A showed late & with a girl with her boobs out- awful for me to say. He said he got child a gift & would be by to give it to him. He didn't show or call. We hugged at the party & I felt some of my old feeligs. However, I must ac...
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Codependent
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8
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748
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101 Easy Ways To Say No
(Preview)
I`d love to, but...
1. I have to floss my cat.
2. I`ve dedicated my life to linguini.
3. I want to spend more time with my blender.
4. The President said he might drop in.
5. The man on television told me to say tuned.
6. I`ve been scheduled for a karma transplant.
7. I`m staying home to work on my cott...
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Mobirdie
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2
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770
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please hear me
(Preview)
I have joined this site twice and cancelled myself twice. I continue to read the site many times a day, but had grown to feel this was not for me. I am the mother, not the spouse. So much of what I read was (in my own interpretation, I am sure) critical of mothers. I could not bear it. I took it personally. But...
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omajoy
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9
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447
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Serenity now....serenity now....
(Preview)
We are cooking dinner for my AH's family. Not only are they dull, but either they are drunks or make my co-dependency look like child's play. You can't sneeze without everyone discussing it. So, I am trying to brace for them - how badly I would rather be with my family where we actually enjoy being wit...
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optimistundone
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6
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522
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A Christmas message for everyone
(Preview)
Earth But Cloaks Your Heaven I salute you. I am your friend, and my love for you goes deep. There is nothing I can give you which you have not already, but there is much, very much, which though I cannot give it, you can take. No heaven can come to us unless our hearts find rest in today. Take heaven. No peace...
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Tenderheartsks
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4
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573
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update for shocking phone call
(Preview)
I posted a couple of days ago about my husband's daughter calling and wanting ot meet him. She's 41 and he has never seen her. We had a change in plans and were able to move up the Thursday afternoon meting to today. We drove an hour away and Met K. and her husband and 6 ½ year old daughter. It went very well...
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afglin
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11
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626
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I left him.................
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
I've done it. I've left my Abf. I got a new place for myself and have now moved in alone. He also has an apartment, he shares. I helped him with moving...spent a week packing and unpacking and it still isn't nearly finished.
Really I'm amazed at how quickly it all happened. I decided...
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annmarie
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15
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631
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Holiday Wishes to All of You
(Preview)
Since this is the time of sharing and giving; I'd like to share and give a little what I have learned and the importance of changing belief systems.
So often, "it's not fair," is a cry or a wail or a hurt uttered, with justification we all have said or heard. I've been thinking on that: withou...
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Euoria
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5
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392
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Ho, Ho, HO!!!
(Preview)
I wish each and every one of you the merriest Christmas ever, and hope the coming new year will be find you happy, healthy, safe, and serene. Diva
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Diva
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5
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343
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The gift from my house to yours
(Preview)
((((((((Family))))), Good morning. On this Christmas Eve, this was my reading from one of my favorite meditation books: The Promis of a New Day by Karen Casey & Martha Vanceburg (Hazelden 1991). ...... [To] take something from yourself, to give to another, that is humane and gentle and nev...
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Karilynn
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3
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552
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HAPPY HOLIDAYS
(Preview)
((((((Dear Family))))) Wishing my MIP family a Very Happy Holiday Season, and a blessed and prosperous New Year. Thank you all for being here for me I appreciate you all more than you will ever know. I know I couldn't make it without this site and all of you! Love and Blessings, Claudia
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cookie1971
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4
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311
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"Twas the night before Christmas..."
(Preview)
The reading of this poem on Christmas Eve, I am reliably informed, is now internationally widespread and it is especially delightful and appealing to the child in all of us and so, I thought I would give you this, and even if you do not have a child to read this to, read it to the child in you and enjoy, it so...
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Heartbroken
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4
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845
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Christmas thoughts..
(Preview)
Though this won't be the Christmas of my dreams, it will one heck of a lot better than last year. Last year my ah was with us the whole time, but was severely depressed and impaired the whole time. He was anti-social and slipped away to be alone whenever he could. For the past 18 yrs, I have orchestrated ev...
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Loupiness
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2
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342
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update
(Preview)
on friday i went to have lunch with SAH i asked him if he was working xmas day he said they didnt give him an answer,so on my way out we passed his boss,and asked him,his boss said all new employees are to work xmas day and they have new years day off...but his boss said if you wpuld like to switch from xmas to ne...
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bev
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2
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268
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Merry Christmas to all...
(Preview)
of my wonderful Alanon friends & family. I wish all of you some peace during this holiday season. The greatest Alanon/Christmas gift I have ever received was learning that everything is temporary. What seems like a crisis today will not be so in a month or a year. I hope everyone can find an Ala...
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AlaMom
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3
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345
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Holiday Wishes
(Preview)
Dear MIP Family, This time of year always reminds me of how much I am grateful for and all the blessings I have in my life. This board and the chatroom are such a blessing to me. You are all a gift in my life. Your experience, strength and hope help me daily in my Alanon journey. I hold you all in my heart. ...
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carosie
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2
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491
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Stress..Happy...Anger
(Preview)
Everyone experiences some kind of stress in life. Money, children, work, bills...then come the other pressures...sex, A/drugs...guilt. A whole whirlwind of private hell that each and every one of us get to travel through at some point in our lives. My problem is coping. Coping with an AH...st...
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Just For Now
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3
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254
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Fighting for change tooth and nail
(Preview)
I am feeling so good about life again. I am working so hard to change my co-dependent habits - counting beers/pills, letting H dictate my moods, ignoring my needs. As if that isn't hard enough, AH is fighting me every step of the way. I never realized that this journey would be so difficult. It is lon...
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optimistundone
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7
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743
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Sharing the losses
(Preview)
((((Family)))) The last 4 weeks have been very "intense" for me. During that time three people I know have died suddenly and unexpectedly. Two of these were program friends and one is someone I have sat next to in meetings at work once a week for the last year. I just returned home from a memor...
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david62
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8
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454
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Do I belong here?
(Preview)
Part of me knows the answer to the question, "Do I belong here?", but part of me wonders. My step-dad is a recovering alcoholic with 26 years sobriety. But that sobriety didn't begin until I had lived in the home with him for 7 years - which was ALL of my teenage years. It wasn't an abusive ho...
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round3
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4
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426
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Dry and Sober
(Preview)
What is the difference between sober and dry?
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Codependent
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3
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1031
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Merry Christmas!
(Preview)
(((((((((Family))))))))), Just wanted to take a few moments to wish all of you a very blessed and lovely holiday (which ever one you celebrate). Merry Christmas, Happy Kwansa, Happy New Year and all the love and blessings I have. I hold each and everyone of you close in my heart. When things settle...
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Karilynn
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6
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277
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Still going
(Preview)
The A has been gone for two weeks now. I finally quit worrying that he was going to show back up here in the middle of the night. He started calling me a little over a week ago. He's been living in the car, working day labor. When he saves enough, he gets a motel room for the night. He's buddied up with ano...
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texasproud2005
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4
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259
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The Awakening!!
(Preview)
The Awakening~~ A time comes in your life when you finally get it... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blin...
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Peggy7
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7
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377
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Hiding his drinking
(Preview)
Hi friends, I really need to vent. In the past two months my AH has spent a week in a locked detox facility, gotten a DUI, with blood alcohol of about.27, trial upcoming. He went into detox after I told him I was filing for divorce. He is supposed to be getting into an alcohol treatment program for court...
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Chetch
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4
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1380
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When you love your A more than yourself...
(Preview)
First, one can obviously see that I am alone on a Friday night by my many posts. The post about weakness and kindness triggered some introspection in me. I think it is possible that the reason that I am willing to trady my serenity for his chaos and rejection is because I actually love him more than I love...
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Codependent
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9
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594
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Please accept my sincere apologies...
(Preview)
Please accept my sincere apologies, it was never my intention to cause dissension or disharmony within this valued 'family'. I am deeply distressed to think that I have done so quite inadvertantly. I am sorry too if my reaction and responses were inappropriate. Having lived with a great deal of re...
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Heartbroken
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8
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2409
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