Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

NatalieP · NatalieP

Hello all, First just a little bit of info about my situation...I joined this group a few years ago and posted once or twice but went no further.Â Life has been up and down like a roller coaster, as I'm sure you all have experienced.Â I think I've been resistant to finding a local meeting or coming back...

El · El

Hello MIP family! I read the board every single day, but have not felt the energy to participate. It has been an extremely stressful time, but we have all been there, I know. Since December, we have gone from one medical issue to the next, with my 90 year old mother most recently in the hospital. She is...

KT2015 · KT2015

I noticed a little while ago that so much of my frustration was due to me not speaking up. It's kind of hard to describe but some of my old behaviour would be to let everything go, tell everyone everything is ok even if it wasn't and then blow up at the smallest thing that went wrong when I couldn't take it an...

septembergirl · septembergirl

Hi, I am new here. I wonder if anyone relates or can help. This is a long post, I know. I have an alcoholic sister. She is 33. She drinks daily, has had a DUI, and even been to rehab. She has been one for about a decade now. It hasn't affected my life much until 4 years ago because we've lived in separate places...

Aline · Aline

Today my ex-abf got bitten pretty badly by our/his cat. He's not castrated, and can become crazy sometimes with no good reason. The good news - I didn't rush to ex-abf's apartment to save the day like I have done so many times before. He asked me to come over and bring him painkillers. He said I was the only...

Jerry F · Jerry F

When I first got into the program the ladies in the room use to talk about "Their Qualifier" and/or "Their Alcoholic" I was intrigued until I came to understand that truthfully could not qualify the person who got them into the room as the husband the wanted to be married to and live their lives out wi...

Jayla · Jayla

So I have posted before about my prayers to HP to know the truth about my AH. And HP's answers were quick and enlightening. Very quickly after asking HP, I found out my AH was having an affair and kicked him out of our home. I had already had enough of being left home alone while he was out drinking and partyi...

Charlotte22 · Charlotte22

Hi Everyone, I do NOT want to isolate and I need to call or go to a meeting but my father who is my qualifier died 6 months ago and he was very rageful and hurtful to me. We did not really have a proper goodbye and I THOUGHT that I had forgiven him and healed but it opened up flood gates for me. I am in my 50s now a...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for today discusses how easily one can become overwhelmed, especially in an alcoholic household. It can be difficult to get organized and know what to do first. But if you can break things down into manageable pieces, that is the idea behind "One Day At A Time." You can even take one task a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for today, July 30 (my birthday) is very apropo. The reading asks the question:' what am I going to do with this day"? It points out that the day has so many hours in it and in order to really appreciate it to the fullest we can make a plan to not waste a moment worrying about yesterday nor...

el-cee · el-cee

Self doubt and insecurity have leaked into my relationship a little. I get the negative self talk like am I attractive enough for him? Are the women he was with better at...being women really. I feel like I'm a new women. While living with my ex I refused to be a woman. I wouldn't wear make up or get my hair d...

JDas09 · JDas09

I am struggling while the alcoholic I love is in treatment. He relapsed two weeks ago and made the decision to not just detox but to go away and get the help he needs. I am very happy for him as he wouldn't even talk about going away again it was a hot topic. But he did it! The problem is I am struggling with the l...

Isthisreallife · Isthisreallife

It's been a few months since.i posted last. I swear I like I'm with Dr jackel and mr Hyde. My husband is a train wreck and he knows. The last.of the shenanigans I posted about breaking into my medication lock box and taxing 5 of Ambien and several bubitol asspap caps (benzo for migraine) and drank 1/2 of 1...

a4l · a4l

I think I have grown as a person over the last five years. Still a bit bull at a gate but not without stopping to think a whole heap more than I used to. I've taken it upon myself to attempt pulling together my wider foo for a cultural matter. I wish I had the solid program of my program idols like Betty

no l...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Gratitude list might sound "odd" as I grieve the death of my only BIO sister but really it helps me to go ODAT in relative peace I am thankful that my sister is not in pain anymore and who now is whole and in the happy place I am grateful that my health is good and my blood tests came out good Grateful that my o...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page points to AlAnon as a spiritual program in which religious affiliation or belief is not required. It is vital, however, to conceive of and rely on a power greater than ourselves that will bring meaning to our Step work and recovery.It matters not what we call our higher power, for some it h...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hi everyone!!! I hope this evening finds you all well and at peace..I am doing the ODAT slogan big time...There are times I am "normal" (oh yea! right!) and then like the tides, the grief comes in a wave and I have to let the feelings pass through me... Practicing being in the present helps, AND I am in cha...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I am so grateful that I do the best I can to work a program....sometimes, life just 'builds up' - this is my 'dump' ... if you will. I am heading out the door for softball shortly and just need to share... I've spoken before - large family. I am close with all my cousins and we all have families, children, e...

hotrod · hotrod

Good Morning All. The ODAT reading for today 7-28 speaks about progress in alanon recovery . It notes that progress in the Al-Anon program may appear to be lacking but that if we keep coming back and using the tools, meetings, slogans, steps, sponsors, and daily readings. one day we will find...

usf1970 · usf1970

I'm in a bit of a crisis (self-inflicted) and my sponsor is on vacation. I don't want to bother her. I have a medically complex 8 yo grandson and he is currently in the hospital. I read a FB post on my daughter's page about another child having similar problems and it turned out that the issue was cancer. Th...

WestMan · WestMan

Was giving a good friend a ride this morning. Eventually during our conversation she asked how my AW has been and was wondering if she was still going to meetings. She said my wife had told her about the addiction and starting AA. I told her that I appreciated her asking but that she would have to ask my wif...

Iamhere · Iamhere

The reading today is about adopting healthy behaviors to replace adaptive unhealthy behaviors many of us practice before recovery. The writer discusses the suggested closing portion --- "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." --- and works hard to leave judgmental attitudes out...

SoggySlippers · SoggySlippers

Just wanted to say hello again.It's been awhile since I've been here and it's good to be back. As much as I try to make myself believe that I don't need people,that I can deal with all of this on my own,it's simply a big fat lie.

mamalioness · mamalioness

I wrote this on Facebook this morning the doctors told the girls Jane was imminent and they would give her one more morphine to make sure there was no pain They didn't have to drug her..She , when her breathing mask was pulled off, barely fluttered her eyes and she passed away peacefully....Thank you A...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

This weekend was the trip back to Illinois and really had a nice time .. it was good to see old friends and watch the kids have fun. I did not see my daughter much as she was out and about with her BFF. I love those kids without question and I feel so badly that they don't have the same relationships here curr...

Kmtaylor · Kmtaylor

Hi today the concept of powerlessness has been reinforced. I realize I can't control or change what my AH is doing. I feel so disrespected I just don't know how to handle it. My AH uses other things as well and has been leaving things around the house. I don't want to see it, smell it, nothing. I don't want i...

Ducky · Ducky

Hello, I am new to this forum, and came her specifically for some opinions on the matter of my MIL. My husband and I are expecting our first child in January and had our gender reveal this last weekend. I picked up his mother and brought her to our home, when she got to our home within 15 minutes she could bar...

BethBethBeth · BethBethBeth

Hi all. I just need to vent and hopefully get some ESH. My AH and I have been in therapy a month. He admitted to being a 'problem drinker' (right?) in our first session. I have known this for a while and been going to alanon and working the steps one day at a time so I am a baby in recovery. In our third sessi...

a4l · a4l

It drives me absolutely nuts to deal with a 62 year old professional victim. Everything's so rooted in the past and its just selfish. Everyone has had problems been hurt. Why can't we lock people in a room and slogan them to health?? Grrr. Just a foo vent. I must remind myself, Christopher Robyn didn't t...

kadriliisa · kadriliisa

Where i can find al anon book Pathways to recovery electronically?

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

The author of today's page addressed the illusions that can limit serenity: The illusion that we can or should control others, and the illusion that the emptiness we feel inside can be filled with something outside of our self. AlAnon suggests that healing begins when we see what we need to heal withi...

Rakiaanan · Rakiaanan

i am really weak now , i keep forgiving my boyfriend drunk behavior . up and down . i can love him anymore

a4l · a4l

Today I am grateful for my sanity as I know it, work in progress that it is. I'm waist deep with the foo, and its great but there are definite aspects of certifiably insane, literally. Having said that, every generation brings a bit of hope. Makes me wonder how much of mental illness is a fear defense. ...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good Morning Everyone- Today's reading is about the defense mechanisms we may learn having grown up or living with alcoholism. The writer specifically mentions how he/she learned to hide from his/her alcoholic parents. Over time the writer learned to hide in obvious ways, and more subtle, such...

Mapper · Mapper

I am someone who is a doer. I've always been one to get things done when they need to get done. I'm constantly cleaning the house, doing yardwork, running errands, paying bills. I rarely sit still for 5 minutes when H is at work because that's my time to get things done. Because when he's home he'll make ja...

kayS · kayS

I'm new here and, I don't know, sort of new to life with an alcoholic/addict. 6 years now. To me it feels more and more like this is my life rather than a bump in the road. My husband of 23 years - someone I've been involved with since we were both in 8th grade (so 33 years now), is addicted to opiates. It st...

nobody7 · nobody7

I am new to this message though not new to the program. I have gone through so many changes in the last five years that were very necessary for my well being. I am in a safe place and doing okay. But I am having trouble with going to any meetings so this feels safe to me for right now. I work the program as b...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page considers the struggling newcomer to AlAnon, and suggests not overwhelming them further with a flood of advice. A warm welcome, some encouragement and reassurance is suggested. A newcomer's arrival can benefit all as it is an opportunity for them to find relief and hope, and for us to b...

lookingup · lookingup

Managing time,,time managementPermalink Reply Quote More Hello everybody,hope all is having a great weekend im working on how to manage my time, seems I spend way to much time on one thing when I should be spending my time elsewhere, if that makes sense,this is a everyday issue in my life,,I star...

Mapper · Mapper

We had a housewarming/anniversary party to go to this past weekend. It is a very good friend of my H. I was a little afraid of going because my H and his wife had a falling out a few years ago, but are now over it, but it was still awkward to go hang out with people who I haven't seen or talked to in over two years....

Iamhere · Iamhere

Some may remember and some may not but I have a cousin who lost her 18 YO son in a horrific car accident about 1.5 years ago. As I can only guess, and not imagine, she's not been the same since and has some severe depression, PTSD, grieving issues. I've been reaching out to her ever since inviting her to go t...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Ever since I got into recovery, I have slammed, cursed, wished death upon active alcoholics ALL because My mother was one of the worst kind...Instead of 30 pieces of silver, she sold me to my bio sire, HER husband for a quart of Seagram 7...That is all I was worth..."Trafficked" by my own bio mother...a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for July 23 speaks about having "racing thoughts" and urges that we take time to examine their validity.. The reading suggests that many times these raising thoughts are so complex that it is difficult to reason them out, so that it is best if we not waste our time doing so. That we c...

mamalioness · mamalioness

I have been, for my entire life, battling the "can't stay in the moment" issue...not being able to stay in the present....not in my body, et al, common and expected, actually, byproducts of severe child abuse and trauma...I had to dissociate from my mind/body for so long, it became a habit... my RX???...

hotrod · hotrod

ODAT Reading for July 22 speaks about trying to understand the disease of alcoholism. It points out that reading scientific books on the disease, unless we are professionals in the field, will give us no additional information because nothing will be gained by an in-depth study of the disease. It p...

Charlotte22 · Charlotte22

Hi Everyone, I KNOW that HIGHER POWER is is in these boards and rooms and speaks through others. When I was in my 20s i was very depressed and someone told me about A l anon after hearing about my father and the alcoholism in my family. After 1 years in AL ANON the depression completely went away! I found...

mamalioness · mamalioness

2017 has been the year from hell and I could simmer in that and "woe is me" on that and make it WORSE if that is of my choosing, but I choose to find the roses amidst this "manure" ladened year Grateful for: I made my peace with my sister, on my own, reached out and forgave and established some sort of "OK" rela...

LexieA · LexieA

I am going to not figure out what might happen in my future, but look at the present moment and see the beauty in my surroundings. I am going to enjoy my visit with my sister and not think about what my AH might do! I am going to bring humor into my day like making laughing animal noises with my kids to not feel t...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is all about core Al-Anon - how we are powerless and can recover if we are willing to believe and trust a power greater than ourselves. The opening line - "The people I love won't take care of themselves, so I have to do it. How will they survive unless I ....." - that is often the thinking o...

shrnp · shrnp

I hope nobody minds if I share this, I can't talk about it to anyone right now. My ex-husband just called me and he is getting paroled after spending 25 years in prison. It blew my mind when he told me. Where I live they have almost abolished parole and I was not expecting it. I have to wait for my son to get ho...

mamalioness · mamalioness

all the stresses since December have finally caught up with me...I felt myself going "south" for a while now......Real sick today!!! ...Was supposed to work today, but texted her and told her I was ill.... Yesterday, I am crying because I can't be mindful, racing fearful thoughts abound, doing my se...

Skorpi · Skorpi

I am still struggling with letting natural consequences for decisions my wife makes play out. Luckily, HP has provided many opportunities for me to practice not rushing in and "saving" the day.

Most recent from this morning: she was due to get off probation in the fall, and with no violations. Ho...

Mary99 · Mary99

I am an ACOA, with many alcoholic family members. I don't drink. My husband drinks wine occasionally. I read with interest the thread where sponsors told people in Al- anon to " remove themselves from all things alcohol", because I have largely been doing this over the years. I also related to people w...

uncreativename · uncreativename

I have gone to meetings in the past, but haven't stuck with it. I am just recently trying again. What I learned in my short attempts at attending meetings before was very helpful to me. I recently had an experience that showed me that I really do need more help in dealing with the alcoholism in my family. T...

Mapper · Mapper

H is so up and down all the time with his mood. Every day I hold my breath hoping he will come home happy from work. Some days a coworker or customer will really get to him and he will come home upset and snap and pretty much anything I say or do. Those nights are so long because I feel like Im walking on eggshell...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP Family! Today's reading discusses change being inevitable and joy. Many of us rarely felt joy before recovery. The program often leads us to find it more frequently. For many, we become too busy trying to avoid change to enjoy the gifts we have for fear of loosing them. What we co...

elrlagoon1996 · elrlagoon1996

Hi everyone, I am new to this journey. My husband is an all day drinker (vodka martini & land shark) who retired last year which only gives him more time to drink. He has a history of anxiety and anger (neither of which he will admit). I am finally seeking help because I am tired of this life (20 year...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Have I turned my will and life over to a power greater than myself? Hmm .. seems to be the question of the day .. acceptance. Acceptance of self as well as others. I spent yesterday afternoon trapped in a training I had originally been looking forward to and found it horribly awkward and uncomfortab...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's author shared in wonderment how AlAnon interaction at a local level is a part of a worldwide group, that we are truly not alone. The ties that bind us are the positive experiences we have and share when we focus on the common goal of understanding the alcoholic and encouraging the relatives and...

VickiR · VickiR

As some of you remember, I have been separated from my AH for a week and a half, after I called the police after a domestic incident. It has been so painful to be ripped apart like this, even though I know it's for the best, we were together for 10 years, many of them great, and suddenly he has been ejected fro...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Help with anger? (Preview) Hello all, First just a little bit of info about my situation...I joined this group a few years ago and posted once or twice but went no further.Â Life has been up and down like a roller coaster, as I'm sure you all have experienced.Â I think I've been resistant to finding a local meeting or coming back...	NatalieP	8	515	Aug 1, 2017 by Iamhere
	Tired.... (Preview) Hello MIP family! I read the board every single day, but have not felt the energy to participate. It has been an extremely stressful time, but we have all been there, I know. Since December, we have gone from one medical issue to the next, with my 90 year old mother most recently in the hospital. She is...	El	6	543	Aug 1, 2017 by KT2015
	How important is it? (Preview) I noticed a little while ago that so much of my frustration was due to me not speaking up. It's kind of hard to describe but some of my old behaviour would be to let everything go, tell everyone everything is ok even if it wasn't and then blow up at the smallest thing that went wrong when I couldn't take it an...	KT2015	7	609	Aug 1, 2017 by Bo
	Sister Has Been an Alcoholic for a Decade and Mother Won't Admit it and also Enables (Preview) Hi, I am new here. I wonder if anyone relates or can help. This is a long post, I know. I have an alcoholic sister. She is 33. She drinks daily, has had a DUI, and even been to rehab. She has been one for about a decade now. It hasn't affected my life much until 4 years ago because we've lived in separate places...	septembergirl	4	411	Jul 31, 2017 by Iamhere
	(Not) owning my choices (Preview) Today my ex-abf got bitten pretty badly by our/his cat. He's not castrated, and can become crazy sometimes with no good reason. The good news - I didn't rush to ex-abf's apartment to save the day like I have done so many times before. He asked me to come over and bring him painkillers. He said I was the only...	Aline	7	561	Jul 31, 2017 by Aline
	So who is she really? (Preview) When I first got into the program the ladies in the room use to talk about "Their Qualifier" and/or "Their Alcoholic" I was intrigued until I came to understand that truthfully could not qualify the person who got them into the room as the husband the wanted to be married to and live their lives out wi...	Jerry F	11	557	Jul 31, 2017 by mamalioness
	HOW CAN I POSSIBLY DECIDE THIS??? (Preview) So I have posted before about my prayers to HP to know the truth about my AH. And HP's answers were quick and enlightening. Very quickly after asking HP, I found out my AH was having an affair and kicked him out of our home. I had already had enough of being left home alone while he was out drinking and partyi...	Jayla	31	819	Jul 31, 2017 by Iamhere
	Struggling with Depression and Anxiety in Recovery (Preview) Hi Everyone, I do NOT want to isolate and I need to call or go to a meeting but my father who is my qualifier died 6 months ago and he was very rageful and hurtful to me. We did not really have a proper goodbye and I THOUGHT that I had forgiven him and healed but it opened up flood gates for me. I am in my 50s now a...	Charlotte22	4	514	Jul 31, 2017 by Lyne
	C2C 7/31/17. ODAT (Preview) The reading for today discusses how easily one can become overwhelmed, especially in an alcoholic household. It can be difficult to get organized and know what to do first. But if you can break things down into manageable pieces, that is the idea behind "One Day At A Time." You can even take one task a...	Lyne	5	351	Jul 31, 2017 by El
	ODAT READING 7-30-2017 (Preview) The ODAT reading for today, July 30 (my birthday) is very apropo. The reading asks the question:' what am I going to do with this day"? It points out that the day has so many hours in it and in order to really appreciate it to the fullest we can make a plan to not waste a moment worrying about yesterday nor...	hotrod	11	465	Jul 30, 2017 by El
	Being good enough (Preview) Self doubt and insecurity have leaked into my relationship a little. I get the negative self talk like am I attractive enough for him? Are the women he was with better at...being women really. I feel like I'm a new women. While living with my ex I refused to be a woman. I wouldn't wear make up or get my hair d...	el-cee	7	471	Jul 30, 2017 by mamalioness
	Confronting The Recovering Alcoholic (Preview) I am struggling while the alcoholic I love is in treatment. He relapsed two weeks ago and made the decision to not just detox but to go away and get the help he needs. I am very happy for him as he wouldn't even talk about going away again it was a hot topic. But he did it! The problem is I am struggling with the l...	JDas09	10	619	Jul 30, 2017 by Bo
	Going to burst (Preview) It's been a few months since.i posted last. I swear I like I'm with Dr jackel and mr Hyde. My husband is a train wreck and he knows. The last.of the shenanigans I posted about breaking into my medication lock box and taxing 5 of Ambien and several bubitol asspap caps (benzo for migraine) and drank 1/2 of 1...	Isthisreallife	4	537	Jul 30, 2017 by Iamhere
	Stress, pressure, trying to let go of results. (Preview) I think I have grown as a person over the last five years. Still a bit bull at a gate but not without stopping to think a whole heap more than I used to. I've taken it upon myself to attempt pulling together my wider foo for a cultural matter. I wish I had the solid program of my program idols like Betty no l...	a4l	8	490	Jul 30, 2017 by a4l
	What am I thankful for in the midst of my grief (Preview) Gratitude list might sound "odd" as I grieve the death of my only BIO sister but really it helps me to go ODAT in relative peace I am thankful that my sister is not in pain anymore and who now is whole and in the happy place I am grateful that my health is good and my blood tests came out good Grateful that my o...	mamalioness	1	420	Jul 30, 2017 by Jerry F
	7-29-17 C2C - A Spiritual, Not Religious Program (Preview) Today's page points to AlAnon as a spiritual program in which religious affiliation or belief is not required. It is vital, however, to conceive of and rely on a power greater than ourselves that will bring meaning to our Step work and recovery.It matters not what we call our higher power, for some it h...	Enigmatic	5	531	Jul 29, 2017 by mamalioness
	Just checking in (Preview) Hi everyone!!! I hope this evening finds you all well and at peace..I am doing the ODAT slogan big time...There are times I am "normal" (oh yea! right!) and then like the tides, the grief comes in a wave and I have to let the feelings pass through me... Practicing being in the present helps, AND I am in cha...	mamalioness	2	404	Jul 29, 2017 by hotrod
	God's Will & Acceptance.... (Preview) I am so grateful that I do the best I can to work a program....sometimes, life just 'builds up' - this is my 'dump' ... if you will. I am heading out the door for softball shortly and just need to share... I've spoken before - large family. I am close with all my cousins and we all have families, children, e...	Iamhere	5	489	Jul 29, 2017 by Iamhere
	ODAT READING 7-28 (Preview) Good Morning All. The ODAT reading for today 7-28 speaks about progress in alanon recovery . It notes that progress in the Al-Anon program may appear to be lacking but that if we keep coming back and using the tools, meetings, slogans, steps, sponsors, and daily readings. one day we will find...	hotrod	4	426	Jul 28, 2017 by maryjane
	acceptance (Preview) I'm in a bit of a crisis (self-inflicted) and my sponsor is on vacation. I don't want to bother her. I have a medically complex 8 yo grandson and he is currently in the hospital. I read a FB post on my daughter's page about another child having similar problems and it turned out that the issue was cancer. Th...	usf1970	20	637	Jul 28, 2017 by usf1970
	I think I did the Right Thing (Preview) Was giving a good friend a ride this morning. Eventually during our conversation she asked how my AW has been and was wondering if she was still going to meetings. She said my wife had told her about the addiction and starting AA. I told her that I appreciated her asking but that she would have to ask my wif...	WestMan	14	585	Jul 28, 2017 by shrnp
	C2C (Courage to Change) 7/27/17 (Preview) The reading today is about adopting healthy behaviors to replace adaptive unhealthy behaviors many of us practice before recovery. The writer discusses the suggested closing portion --- "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." --- and works hard to leave judgmental attitudes out...	Iamhere	7	476	Jul 28, 2017 by 2HP
	It's Been Awhile (Preview) Just wanted to say hello again.It's been awhile since I've been here and it's good to be back. As much as I try to make myself believe that I don't need people,that I can deal with all of this on my own,it's simply a big fat lie.	SoggySlippers	5	388	Jul 28, 2017 by a4l
	Sister died today (Preview) I wrote this on Facebook this morning the doctors told the girls Jane was imminent and they would give her one more morphine to make sure there was no pain They didn't have to drug her..She , when her breathing mask was pulled off, barely fluttered her eyes and she passed away peacefully....Thank you A...	mamalioness	20	4143	Jul 27, 2017 by hotrod
	Weekend Visit .. (Preview) This weekend was the trip back to Illinois and really had a nice time .. it was good to see old friends and watch the kids have fun. I did not see my daughter much as she was out and about with her BFF. I love those kids without question and I feel so badly that they don't have the same relationships here curr...	SerenityRUS	8	412	Jul 27, 2017 by Aline
	I am powerless (Preview) Hi today the concept of powerlessness has been reinforced. I realize I can't control or change what my AH is doing. I feel so disrespected I just don't know how to handle it. My AH uses other things as well and has been leaving things around the house. I don't want to see it, smell it, nothing. I don't want i...	Kmtaylor	5	476	Jul 27, 2017 by Iamhere
	Need advice for relapsing MIL (Preview) Hello, I am new to this forum, and came her specifically for some opinions on the matter of my MIL. My husband and I are expecting our first child in January and had our gender reveal this last weekend. I picked up his mother and brought her to our home, when she got to our home within 15 minutes she could bar...	Ducky	4	366	Jul 26, 2017 by WestMan
	Alcohol, intimacy and ridiculousness (Preview) Hi all. I just need to vent and hopefully get some ESH. My AH and I have been in therapy a month. He admitted to being a 'problem drinker' (right?) in our first session. I have known this for a while and been going to alanon and working the steps one day at a time so I am a baby in recovery. In our third sessi...	BethBethBeth	6	471	Jul 26, 2017 by Iamhere
	The victim routine is killing me. (Preview) It drives me absolutely nuts to deal with a 62 year old professional victim. Everything's so rooted in the past and its just selfish. Everyone has had problems been hurt. Why can't we lock people in a room and slogan them to health?? Grrr. Just a foo vent. I must remind myself, Christopher Robyn didn't t...	a4l	8	478	Jul 26, 2017 by Iamhere
	Step one stories electronically? (Preview) Where i can find al anon book Pathways to recovery electronically?	kadriliisa	3	477	Jul 26, 2017 by kadriliisa
	7-26-17 C2C - Illusion of Control (Preview) The author of today's page addressed the illusions that can limit serenity: The illusion that we can or should control others, and the illusion that the emptiness we feel inside can be filled with something outside of our self. AlAnon suggests that healing begins when we see what we need to heal withi...	Enigmatic	3	494	Jul 26, 2017 by Lyne
	hi i want some support (Preview) i am really weak now , i keep forgiving my boyfriend drunk behavior . up and down . i can love him anymore	Rakiaanan	29	910	Jul 26, 2017 by Aline
	Gratitude and sanity (Preview) Today I am grateful for my sanity as I know it, work in progress that it is. I'm waist deep with the foo, and its great but there are definite aspects of certifiably insane, literally. Having said that, every generation brings a bit of hope. Makes me wonder how much of mental illness is a fear defense. ...	a4l	5	498	Jul 25, 2017 by a4l
	Hope for Today July 25i h (Preview) Good Morning Everyone- Today's reading is about the defense mechanisms we may learn having grown up or living with alcoholism. The writer specifically mentions how he/she learned to hide from his/her alcoholic parents. Over time the writer learned to hide in obvious ways, and more subtle, such...	yanksfan51	5	393	Jul 25, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	The frustration of things piling up that don't get finished! (Preview) I am someone who is a doer. I've always been one to get things done when they need to get done. I'm constantly cleaning the house, doing yardwork, running errands, paying bills. I rarely sit still for 5 minutes when H is at work because that's my time to get things done. Because when he's home he'll make ja...	Mapper	6	551	Jul 25, 2017 by Bo
	letting go (Preview) I'm new here and, I don't know, sort of new to life with an alcoholic/addict. 6 years now. To me it feels more and more like this is my life rather than a bump in the road. My husband of 23 years - someone I've been involved with since we were both in 8th grade (so 33 years now), is addicted to opiates. It st...	kayS	6	589	Jul 25, 2017 by Jerry F
	Feeling inadequate (Preview) I am new to this message though not new to the program. I have gone through so many changes in the last five years that were very necessary for my well being. I am in a safe place and doing okay. But I am having trouble with going to any meetings so this feels safe to me for right now. I work the program as b...	nobody7	13	618	Jul 24, 2017 by Iamhere
	7/24/17 ODAT Newcomer Greetings (Preview) Today's page considers the struggling newcomer to AlAnon, and suggests not overwhelming them further with a flood of advice. A warm welcome, some encouragement and reassurance is suggested. A newcomer's arrival can benefit all as it is an opportunity for them to find relief and hope, and for us to b...	Enigmatic	5	474	Jul 24, 2017 by Aline
	Managing time ,time management (Preview) Managing time,,time managementPermalink Reply Quote More Hello everybody,hope all is having a great weekend im working on how to manage my time, seems I spend way to much time on one thing when I should be spending my time elsewhere, if that makes sense,this is a everyday issue in my life,,I star...	lookingup	6	537	Jul 24, 2017 by mamalioness
	H spent the night at a party rather than come home with me. (Preview) We had a housewarming/anniversary party to go to this past weekend. It is a very good friend of my H. I was a little afraid of going because my H and his wife had a falling out a few years ago, but are now over it, but it was still awkward to go hang out with people who I haven't seen or talked to in over two years....	Mapper	13	661	Jul 24, 2017 by mamalioness
	Fellowship Prayers, Please (Preview) Some may remember and some may not but I have a cousin who lost her 18 YO son in a horrific car accident about 1.5 years ago. As I can only guess, and not imagine, she's not been the same since and has some severe depression, PTSD, grieving issues. I've been reaching out to her ever since inviting her to go t...	Iamhere	10	474	Jul 24, 2017 by andromeda
	I don't want to slam alcoholics anymore!!! (Preview) Ever since I got into recovery, I have slammed, cursed, wished death upon active alcoholics ALL because My mother was one of the worst kind...Instead of 30 pieces of silver, she sold me to my bio sire, HER husband for a quart of Seagram 7...That is all I was worth..."Trafficked" by my own bio mother...a...	mamalioness	16	710	Jul 24, 2017 by mamalioness
	ODAT READING 7-23-2017 (Preview) The ODAT reading for July 23 speaks about having "racing thoughts" and urges that we take time to examine their validity.. The reading suggests that many times these raising thoughts are so complex that it is difficult to reason them out, so that it is best if we not waste our time doing so. That we c...	hotrod	7	471	Jul 24, 2017 by mamalioness
	Mindfulness----a little trick i learned---use what you can, leave the rest (Preview) I have been, for my entire life, battling the "can't stay in the moment" issue...not being able to stay in the present....not in my body, et al, common and expected, actually, byproducts of severe child abuse and trauma...I had to dissociate from my mind/body for so long, it became a habit... my RX???...	mamalioness	19	679	Jul 23, 2017 by mamalioness
	ODAT READING 7-22 (Preview) ODAT Reading for July 22 speaks about trying to understand the disease of alcoholism. It points out that reading scientific books on the disease, unless we are professionals in the field, will give us no additional information because nothing will be gained by an in-depth study of the disease. It p...	hotrod	13	559	Jul 23, 2017 by mamalioness
	Coping with Depression in Al anon Recovery (Preview) Hi Everyone, I KNOW that HIGHER POWER is is in these boards and rooms and speaks through others. When I was in my 20s i was very depressed and someone told me about A l anon after hearing about my father and the alcoholism in my family. After 1 years in AL ANON the depression completely went away! I found...	Charlotte22	6	940	Jul 23, 2017 by Bo
	Finding the roses in the manure (Preview) 2017 has been the year from hell and I could simmer in that and "woe is me" on that and make it WORSE if that is of my choosing, but I choose to find the roses amidst this "manure" ladened year Grateful for: I made my peace with my sister, on my own, reached out and forgave and established some sort of "OK" rela...	mamalioness	3	467	Jul 22, 2017 by hotrod
	Just for today (Preview) I am going to not figure out what might happen in my future, but look at the present moment and see the beauty in my surroundings. I am going to enjoy my visit with my sister and not think about what my AH might do! I am going to bring humor into my day like making laughing animal noises with my kids to not feel t...	LexieA	8	1024	Jul 22, 2017 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/21/17 (Preview) Today's reading is all about core Al-Anon - how we are powerless and can recover if we are willing to believe and trust a power greater than ourselves. The opening line - "The people I love won't take care of themselves, so I have to do it. How will they survive unless I ....." - that is often the thinking o...	Iamhere	6	471	Jul 21, 2017 by Iamhere
	I got some news today. (Preview) I hope nobody minds if I share this, I can't talk about it to anyone right now. My ex-husband just called me and he is getting paroled after spending 25 years in prison. It blew my mind when he told me. Where I live they have almost abolished parole and I was not expecting it. I have to wait for my son to get ho...	shrnp	11	682	Jul 21, 2017 by shrnp
	taking care of me (Preview) all the stresses since December have finally caught up with me...I felt myself going "south" for a while now......Real sick today!!! ...Was supposed to work today, but texted her and told her I was ill.... Yesterday, I am crying because I can't be mindful, racing fearful thoughts abound, doing my se...	mamalioness	10	627	Jul 21, 2017 by hotrod
	Letting Natural Consequences Occur (Preview) I am still struggling with letting natural consequences for decisions my wife makes play out. Luckily, HP has provided many opportunities for me to practice not rushing in and "saving" the day. Most recent from this morning: she was due to get off probation in the fall, and with no violations. Ho...	Skorpi	8	541	Jul 21, 2017 by hotrod
	Can I, should I exclude an alcoholic from a family gathering? (Preview) I am an ACOA, with many alcoholic family members. I don't drink. My husband drinks wine occasionally. I read with interest the thread where sponsors told people in Al- anon to " remove themselves from all things alcohol", because I have largely been doing this over the years. I also related to people w...	Mary99	29	1175	Jul 21, 2017 by KT2015
	Atheist trying another shot at al-anon ( 1 2 ) (Preview) I have gone to meetings in the past, but haven't stuck with it. I am just recently trying again. What I learned in my short attempts at attending meetings before was very helpful to me. I recently had an experience that showed me that I really do need more help in dealing with the alcoholism in my family. T...	uncreativename	51	1702	Jul 21, 2017 by 2HP
	I just can’t get over being affected by his moods! (Preview) H is so up and down all the time with his mood. Every day I hold my breath hoping he will come home happy from work. Some days a coworker or customer will really get to him and he will come home upset and snap and pretty much anything I say or do. Those nights are so long because I feel like Im walking on eggshell...	Mapper	8	577	Jul 21, 2017 by LexieA
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/20/17 (Preview) Good morning MIP Family! Today's reading discusses change being inevitable and joy. Many of us rarely felt joy before recovery. The program often leads us to find it more frequently. For many, we become too busy trying to avoid change to enjoy the gifts we have for fear of loosing them. What we co...	Iamhere	5	506	Jul 20, 2017 by Iamhere
	new here my post (Preview) Hi everyone, I am new to this journey. My husband is an all day drinker (vodka martini & land shark) who retired last year which only gives him more time to drink. He has a history of anxiety and anger (neither of which he will admit). I am finally seeking help because I am tired of this life (20 year...	elrlagoon1996	8	510	Jul 20, 2017 by Aline
	Powerlessness .. and my part (Preview) Have I turned my will and life over to a power greater than myself? Hmm .. seems to be the question of the day .. acceptance. Acceptance of self as well as others. I spent yesterday afternoon trapped in a training I had originally been looking forward to and found it horribly awkward and uncomfortab...	SerenityRUS	5	521	Jul 20, 2017 by SerenityRUS
	7-19-17 ODAT (Preview) Today's author shared in wonderment how AlAnon interaction at a local level is a part of a worldwide group, that we are truly not alone. The ties that bind us are the positive experiences we have and share when we focus on the common goal of understanding the alcoholic and encouraging the relatives and...	Enigmatic	3	485	Jul 19, 2017 by Aline
	Starting over in life (Preview) As some of you remember, I have been separated from my AH for a week and a half, after I called the police after a domestic incident. It has been so painful to be ripped apart like this, even though I know it's for the best, we were together for 10 years, many of them great, and suddenly he has been ejected fro...	VickiR	14	660	Jul 19, 2017 by tiredtonite
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.