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How to trust...are my reactions normal?
(Preview)
My husband and I have been married for 2 months. He is an alcoholic. I was aware of his disease and was willing to support him during this battle. Due to a recent DUI he has begun rehab which he states he is ready to end his drinking. During his drinking binges he would leave for a few days, not answer h...
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Reba2411
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9
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529
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It came as expected
(Preview)
AH had his first relapse Monday night. I expected it was coming for a variety of reasons - number one being that the abrupt change in him was just too easy. I had hope of course that he would be one of those who just put it down one day and never looked back, but my optimism was very cautious, and moreso the lon...
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Twinkies
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12
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586
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Alanon Step 2 posted
(Preview)
Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 2 has been posted to the Step Work Board Please post your thoughts-- here is the link http://stepwork.activeb...
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hotrod
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3
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417
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let it begin w me
(Preview)
I am not a victim of my past. I will not be fearful of my future. I will live in the moment. I will love the unloved. I will cheer on those who need support. I will focus on others not forgetting who made me who I am.
Today I am a winner no matter what anyone says.
My mother will not be a source of my unhappiness!...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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389
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Trying to figure out boundaries....
(Preview)
Thank you for response and advice from my first post. I've found a meeting to go to tomorrow. Two other things I'm struggling with that I am sure don't help are: 1. I am able to have 2 to 3 beers when watching a game or while at band practice and stop, but should I be abstaining even when I am not around her? I d...
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Smp
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5
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467
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New and trying to work Step 1
(Preview)
Hello and thank you to all of you for all your wonderful posts. Iâve been lurking here for the past few months and all of your wisdom has been a life line for me.
I started with AlAnon about 6 months by attending meetings, reading various literature and listening to podcasts. But this morning, after I s...
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Holly73
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8
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486
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Hope for Today Feb 4
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the different options we have to seek out serenity. Like the writer, I choose to get up earlier than my kids so that I have some quiet house time before the day gets started. I tend to embrace quiet like a few of the scenarios mentioned on this page (a quiet...
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yanksfan51
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4
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360
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Got a call from STBXAH and would like some ESH
(Preview)
Hi MIP family! I have been kind of quiet on here, but reading everyday. The reason is pretty much I have been NC with my STBX. He had stopped calling from rehab after my letter was sent. Until tonight. Firstly, I was kind of pissed that he called after 10:00 pm. I was actually just settling into sleep for th...
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PosiesandPuppies
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15
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609
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Middle ground between enabling and giving an ultimatum
(Preview)
I am new here, and I havent even gone to a live meeting yet, so please bear with me. My AW is current,y going to meetings, but this tends to last between 1 to 2 weeks before she slides into a binge. I dont know how to handle these constant back and forths. As of now I know I enable her because I dont try and stop he...
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Smp
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7
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548
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Introduction
(Preview)
Hi. I'm new here. I couldn't find a local meeting, so I hope I can share here. I'm married to an alcoholic. What brings me here now is that over the holidays I experienced a level of hurt that I can't seem to resolve. My inlaws moved 500 miles away before we got married. My father in law died five years ago and...
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chimchimaree
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7
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571
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Bringing kids to meetings?
(Preview)
Hi, Where I am now - I have a lot more access to meetings. The problem is, I have a lot less babysitting help with my husband in rehab and don't have money to pay for a babysitter. My parents can help out with babysitting, but not at these times! Is it appropriate to take a two year old to a meeting and put on a i...
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AnnieFenk321
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4
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430
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Hope for Today Jan 28
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is a reminder about the sole purpose of Alanon-to help friends and families of alcoholics. Just as the focus for Alanon is to help those affected by alcoholism, we are called to remember that our own focus is about our personal recovery first. There are severa...
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yanksfan51
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11
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551
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Feels like the weight of the world is on my shoulders
(Preview)
This is going to be long. As much as I value your ESH, I will understand if you donât get through this whole thing. I just really need a place to put this out there, in black and white, with all of itâs complications and messiness, and this feels like the best place for that. So...AH is considering a job chan...
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Twinkies
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12
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587
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Odat 2/3/18
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for Sat 2-3 talks about trusting HP and when we do we cannot sit back and expect HP to do all the work we must trust that Hp will provide the wisdom and strength to accomplish our tasksLove the quote: " I pray for the wisdom to understand my difficulties , clearly and honestly and fo...
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lookingup
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4
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322
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Blindsided, Heartbroken and Confused
(Preview)
I have been married 18 years to the most beautiful, genuine, compassionate girl I have ever met. She is my best friend, my true soul mate. I was convinced the loss of my father was in order to bring her and I together. Together we have three beautiful kids who are all going to go on to do great things in their...
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Ohana
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5
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579
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Just had an A-HA Moment!
(Preview)
Good Morning! I was reading the C2C post for today (Feb. 2) and had the wake up call of one of the many things I do in my relationships with the As in my family. In my efforts to always have a cheery, comforting, welcoming home, and to make everybody happy all the time, no matter the cost to myself, Im ALWAYS...
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PeacefulLove
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6
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508
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Courage to Change 2/2/18
(Preview)
Today's reading talks about the equality that exists in Al-Anon recovery. Many of us come to the program with a perception of being greater than some and less than others. The writer gives the analogy of being on a ladder rung - middle +/- with some below and some above and God at the very top - way, way u...
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Iamhere
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7
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488
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New
(Preview)
Trying to figure this out
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Wifeandmom
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5
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441
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Happy Anniversary to me
(Preview)
Hello Everyone! Today is my 2nd year anniversary in recovery and I thought I would stop by and celebrate with you, where it all started, and express my sincere gratitude for all of you who stuck by me and encouraged me when I was a crazy person. I am so blessed to be a part of this fellowship and thank my...
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Fooled
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11
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515
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Yoga
(Preview)
Hi all, I have been doing yoga on/off for a few years now. It greatly helps center my mind, body and soul. I've taken classes and am now doing it at home whenever I can get a chance. Yoga with Adriene has free classes on YouTube, and is a great friend I look forward to seeing on the mat. Just thought I would sh...
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Engaged2Drugs
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6
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387
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Courage to Change - 2-1-18
(Preview)
Good morning MIP and Happy February! Today's reading discusses how change in Al-Anon doesn't always affect others around us. We learn as we practice this program how powerless we really are. The writer discusses thinking 'if only' I stop enabling, my A will get better. That was not what happene...
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Iamhere
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3
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371
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mom's recovery
(Preview)
Although it is slow, my mom is recovering after being in jail & now is hospitalized. She is slow & scattered & will never be the mom I held so dearly. I am grateful though that she is in a safe place. I finally talked to her after a month. I couldn't bring myself to talk to her because the pain is s...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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356
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12th-stepping
(Preview)
This is the ongoing saga of my ex-AH. He is in the hospital with multiple problems. It looks as if he has advanced cirrhosis, plus bad injuries from when he fell. He had a procedure to drain his stomach of fluid. A mutual friend was there when he had the news from the doctor. The doctor said, "Do you dr...
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Mattie
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15
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1138
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The 12th Step.
(Preview)
Hi there, it's WendyP, asking for some sharings on the 12th Step. What I am planning on doing is introducing The Alanon Programme in more depth to My Grandson's ex Partner. They have just recently split up again for the some many times. I have shared with both of them before, about AA and Alanon after a ve...
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WendyP
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4
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480
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sober for 12 years
(Preview)
I feel Im the reason my AH started drinking after so long. It's to do with communion in the Catholic Church. I was heart broken to be told I couldn't take communion as he's a divorced man. The annulment inquisition for my husband was dreadful. His doctor said it pushed him over the edge. It is annulled now...
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ling
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2
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402
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sorry I repeated the same post.
(Preview)
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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286
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Trying to stay focused
(Preview)
I'm trying to stay focused on myself and my improvement, but it has been hard recently. Right before Christmas I had decided to leave my AH. He was very actively drinking and I did not want to be around it any longer. We were taking care of his mother's horse. I called her to let her know that I was leaving AH...
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Gardening
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13
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539
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Sponsorship question
(Preview)
Hello all! I went to my second F2F Al Anon meeting this week. Since I live in a very remote area of the country, and Al Anon is not very active within a 200 mile radius of where I live, meeting attendance here is very weak. This week, it was me and 1 other newbie couple (husband and wife) in attendance. A ch...
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PeacefulLove
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5
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795
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private hospitals
(Preview)
Hi do they work? My AH ha been classed as a very severe cases but has been told it will be weeks. Can anyone recommend anywhere near guildford? He cannot cut down thank you
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ling
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25
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584
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Keep the focus on myself
(Preview)
I've found myself getting into arguments with my AH the last few days. They are relatively minor but I find myself getting very emotionally drawn in and upset. I won't go into the minutia of the argument but the theme is my AH will do something that is obviously rude or obnoxious. I will say "Hey What t...
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KT2015
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9
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574
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Courage to Change January 31
(Preview)
Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about steps 6 and 7. The author shares that, despite their zealous work on the 12 steps for over a year, they still experienced lapses into self-pity and resentment over the alcoholic's inability to give them the emotional support they wanted. One...
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Skorpi
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2
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347
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Reinventing the Wheel
(Preview)
I was talking to someone and just heard this and it made me laugh however that about sums everything up in my life at the moment. It has some positives however I am struggling in some areas. I have no A however I am obsessing about my oldest of course. I have really had to step back, I am removing myself...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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434
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How to start new alateen group in town?
(Preview)
Hi! Recently new al anon group started in one place of estonia and they asked about alateen as there might be some needy teenagers too. How to start new alateen meeting?
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kadriliisa
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2
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397
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Need help!
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I'm not sure if I should be posting this here as its marijuana related rather than alcohol related, so maybe I need to find an online naranon group, but I just haven't time to do that right now and I'm feeling quite worried about my son and wondered, any esh out there. My son is a daily marijuan...
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Sorcha
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7
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456
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C2C reading 1-30-2018
(Preview)
The C2C reading January 30 speaks about interacting with the disease of alcoholism and discovering that there are no rules and that things can change from moment to moment. As a result, we tend to mistrust everybody and grab at every opportunity without thinking. The reading points out that we nee...
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hotrod
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5
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887
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Enabling/Helping/Controlling Confusing!
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I have been navigating the legal separation process with my STBXAH - after he was removed from our home in July for domestic violence he was court ordered to live with a friend. His court stuff is finally behind him, he has completed his program and can now move out on his own. Problem is he is...
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VickiR
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23
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663
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getting involved to save AH
(Preview)
Hi one of the reasons my AH is in self destruct is that his son has disowned him and hasn't told him why. Nothing. SS is playing control. I want to send SS a message to say that his dad will die unless he rings him . Is it getting involved? He's very stubborn and unlikely to answer. He did not speak to him when he...
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ling
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11
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492
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update
(Preview)
Hi friends, I wanted to update. I have managed to get to a F2F meeting. It was fantastic. Made such a difference that it was in English.... and in my home culture.... whoa. I felt crazy relief. There was some catching up after the meeting - it was lovely. I am living with my mum. She is a sick woman. She is...
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AnnieFenk321
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6
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469
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1/29 ODAT
(Preview)
This one is a great one for me and always has been specially the thought for today and saying. I will be a good boy today.
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Jerry F
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1
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310
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C2C, 1/29
(Preview)
Self expression vs. trying to control: The reading today explores the difference between voicing our own feelings, and using words to control others. The author says if he puts his opinion out, and then lets it go, he is speaking sincerely. However, if he repeats himself many times over, waiting...
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Lyne
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8
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598
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First post - A's 3rd relapse
(Preview)
Hello, all. This is my first post as I have just joined a few minutes ago. I went to one Al-Anon meeting a month or two ago, but have not been since. I thought since my fiance (the A) was doing well, I didn't need to go. I have recently discovered he is using again. This is his third relapse in four years. Since...
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Engaged2Drugs
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9
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389
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Acceptance and Unacceptable Behavior
(Preview)
Do you know the difference between the two? Are they separate and distinct with you? I've long talked about acceptance, immersing yourself in it, and laying down the sword. I've said when someone hits you the ping pong ball, you put down the paddle, when the tug of war starts, you drop the rope. Step One...
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Bo
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25
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2211
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Out of My Hula Hoop?
(Preview)
Hello all. It's been a while. I sure notice when I slack off and stop reading these boards my life becomes unmanageable again! I still can't attend f2f meetings due to a court-ordered conflict. * Here is my question to you all and your ESH would be appreciated since I am so torn on this subject. * I have bee...
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Jayla
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13
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598
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Dealing with some new anger over reality
(Preview)
Dear MIP family, I know that this will be a rant against my STBXRAH. I understand that I have to keep the focus on me. But something has happened that has hit me to the core. Things that happen to me suck, but with the tools, I am pretty successfully managing them. Tonight was different. I have this lovely B...
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PosiesandPuppies
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31
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759
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Recovery with Naltrexone?
(Preview)
I read alot of information about a drug called Naltrexone. Claudia Christian's impressive story of recovery by taking this drug is shared on the internet. She had tried every alcohol recovery treatment and became sober and her cravings stopped after using this. It was used in opiod recovery an...
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wifeofalcoholic
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5
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463
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ctc 1-27-17
(Preview)
C2C 1-27 speaks about our tendency of making mountains out of molehills. It points out that many times we blow up over a small incident simply because we have ignored too many small annoyances and this can buildup to a huge explosion of temper . Living one day at a time focused on ourselves, not react...
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lookingup
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4
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353
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Made it 21 days
(Preview)
Shortly after new years I had to call an ambulance for my wife. After a being at the ER for a few hours and not hearing anything we were asking questions and i found out that she had a BAC of almost .50 vice the assumed issue of BP med issues. I had to come home early because she wasn't feeling well and on my way h...
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Shane
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4
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355
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Courage to Change 1/26/18
(Preview)
Today's reading is about Step 12. The writer suggests that reading this step - "Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps....." gave her hope for a better tomorrow when first arriving at Al-Anon. Her journey through recovery and the steps, sometimes painful and often slow, did ar...
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Iamhere
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5
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444
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Right to worry, or over-reacting due to experiences?
(Preview)
Hello everyone. This is my first post - and I'm looking for some perspective. My father was an alcoholic, then moved onto prescription drugs. He's been sober now, save a small relapse, for about 16 years. Most of my childhood memories are of my dad being drunk/passed out and the associated dramas. I'm...
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SuziS
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10
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534
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Planning my day
(Preview)
my day may look like this,or???(it's not always easy for me to plan my day,if I stick to the simple ,basics it just might go lots smoother on my crazy day. wake up 6-7 am morning routine ( put coffee on,read all dailies,serenity prayer several times,meditate and prayer,mip meeting 8 am( my time) G&...
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lookingup
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9
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427
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Blacklisted from online meeting due to trojan?
(Preview)
Hi everyone.........wow nothing like the "I need a meeting" only to be met with blacklisted due to some trojan? I don't understand how to fix this.....and my Antivirus program is picking up nothing Anyone know what this is? Thank you
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Tude
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8
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456
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In Recovery but Losing Marriage
(Preview)
Hi all, I am in a recovery, and am approaching the 4 month mark in AA. The last 4 months have been the most amazing I can remember, since my university days when alcohol was actually fun and not a problem. I hit rock bottom when my wife informed me that she had had enough, and intended to separate from me per...
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180 Man
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39
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1648
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new user in name
(Preview)
but its the same me. I've changed my username as an additional privacy measure as I am now firmly ensconced in a new and smaller country. I have come along way away from my programme, after having to jump back into the non-recovery world. Slipped into the typical adversarial position and it doesn't ma...
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thepeacewithin
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3
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402
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Prayers Please ..
(Preview)
To say that it's been a LONG 8 weeks is putting it mildly. Lots of new information .. more was totally revealed .. LOL .. I have had awesome moments of parenting and moments that I felt like I had a neon parenting fail sign up over my head .. LOL .. with both of my kids. Parenting is an extremely humbling exp...
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SerenityRUS
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12
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457
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Just for Today Bookmark
(Preview)
I just wanted to pass along this Alanon bookmark which has helped me tremendously when life seemed out of control. You can pick one up in a f2f meeting or an alanon information center. The concepts on it may be hard to practice completely on any given day. I have found that if I pick one and use it for tha...
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tommyecat
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11
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9795
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Courage to Change 1/25/18
(Preview)
Today's reading discusses what many of us focused on prior to recovery! It was 'not us' - almost anyone or anything else...We often loved the drama of another's crisis and talked about it often. Our own lives seems trivial and our issues felt small in comparison. Most of us found it very hard to focu...
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Iamhere
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2
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371
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Gossip
(Preview)
I have been listening to the phone bridge and attending meetings. One of the topics that has come up is gossip and I'd like a clarification or ESH. Since my AH began drinking again after a month of sobriety, it was clear as to how much the disease had progressed. A few people close to us knew he was an alc...
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jtpickle
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13
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538
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Going insane
(Preview)
I am feeling at my wits end with a family member. I am supposed to be collecting someone from the airport right now as I have their car. Said annoying family member threw a tantrum and has taken off with the car key and no mobile phone. I am utterly powerless and the consequence will be no more assistance fr...
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a4l
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12
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424
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Out of My Hula Hoop?
(Preview)
Hello all. It's been a while. I sure notice when I slack off and stop reading these boards my life becomes unmanageable again! I still can't attend f2f meetings due to a court-ordered conflict. * Here is my question to you all and your ESH would be appreciated since I am so torn on this subject. * I have bee...
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Jayla
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5
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389
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feeling homeless and alone
(Preview)
Hi friends, I am safely in my country of origin.... My husband is in our home country in rehab. The last week has been horrible. We packed up the whole appartment - me and my mother. My son was beside himself. It was so hard for him, every time he woke up there was less in the house and more mess. It's been ho...
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AnnieFenk321
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10
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512
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