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Newcomers speaking up in meetings
(Preview)
I am new to Alanon... this week will be my f2f meeting, so I've been going about a month. I have a question for the oldtimers. I don't want to talk! It's not that I am shy. I am anything but shy, but so far, I have not had anything "authentic" to say during a meeting. I have chatted before the meetings, and been...
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Dog
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12
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567
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How do I get to my pm box
(Preview)
I cannot find a link to the pm box anywhere, maybe I'm just not seeing it. There is a message there that I want to reply to and darned if I can find my way there.
TIA
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Mobirdie
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2
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280
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what addicts do
(Preview)
Hi,
I just went back and read morbies post on what addicts do and it was another reminder how blessed I am he is not in my life any more.It is so funny how some of us are blessed enough to get out of the relationship and we forget all the sleepless nights the cheating the lieing and the abuse and we tha...
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dori
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3
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428
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A maybe dry, but behaviors still there
(Preview)
Hello Group,
Today is 30 days sober for my A. I can see the challenges he faced this month as well as myself. For me it was my insecurity, my anger, my fear. The behaviors are still there for the A. The anger and rages are not as bad. He has been able to control himself in s...
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twinmom2
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6
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373
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Missing the A
(Preview)
I am having a hard day today. My A boyfriend went into a rage on Friday with that I have not seen him since Sunday morning. He came to my house on Saturday night late and he spent the night.. I dropped him off back to his house on sunday. I have not seen him or spoke to him since. My choice, because I have t...
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mandalynn38
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6
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476
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first f2f
(Preview)
Finally made it to a al-anon mtg. lotsa nice folks with lotsa encouragements! I plan on it being a weekly stop. Found the books that I've been told about too. I've been told that the alateen in my area will be starting up again so that the kids will have the help that they need to...
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Keoki
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3
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326
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My Life
(Preview)
I never thought my life would end up like it is. I always dreamed of being happily married with the house white picket fence, & the kids. Needless to say it didn't end up like that. I met my husband in highschool. I loved him unconditionally. As teenagers we did our share of partying. I never thought h...
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heartless39470
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5
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349
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Help I'm losing it again
(Preview)
I'm losing it...and I'd been doing so well. I guess when things are going okay, I think I don't have to work my program...especially the "being good to myself" part, and then it all slides downhill.
I looked back over my own posts, and it seems like I have this recording that is broken...isn't t...
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Belongtome
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10
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517
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Reflections
(Preview)
Detachment means not worrying,not judging and not rescuing.
Hope ever tells us tomarrow will be better.
If we share another's burden,both of us will walk straighter.
Just for today I will treat myself gently and nuture the child within.
Losers say"I can't"winners say,"I'll t...
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angel123
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0
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218
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AH is dragging me down; nickel and diming me to death
(Preview)
Just when I start to kind of pull myself together something my AH does comes back to bring me back down. I was starting to feel a little better today after the bad weekend I had.
I checked my checking account on-line just now and found four $29 overdraft charges on my account. My money is separate from my...
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Lindy
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4
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1600
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disorganized and unmotivated!!!
(Preview)
Lately I have been so disorganized. My desk at work seems to always be a mess. I spend too much time on this board and do not seem to get things done the way I used to. I think I am becoming addicted to MIP. At home I do not get things done unless I am "under the gun" so to speak. I am last minute with everything. It...
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Gailey
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6
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480
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Safe in Prison???
(Preview)
I'm sorry to say I rarely post here but do read all of your thoughts and experiences and they help me so much. I do go to alanon meetings every week also and am doing my best to work the program and feel better. However, for the past month or so I have been crying every day, even at work and even in...
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April306
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9
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506
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my motives
(Preview)
i want to talk to my ah and tell him that insted of doing whatever it is he is doing he should be with his kids. he had a whole day that he didn't work and he never even called to ask if he could be with our 3 year old. i bet it never even occured to him. i know it didn't. or he sees his son from a prevoius marria...
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serendipity
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1
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387
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Al-Anon meetings?
(Preview)
I am quite new to Al-Alon and never been to a meeting yet. I ahve a few questions about them I am hoping ypou can answer.
1. Are they for anyone who suffers form A in thier family? i.e. ACoA and spouses, etc...
2. Does it matter where you go I noticed that all the one in my area have differnt
names, does t...
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iwishuheaven
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9
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643
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more mind games
(Preview)
Hi everyone...more crap for me to vent about.quick history...my active A husband has been gone 7 months.we have 4 children and he gives me no money..infact he has cost me money...credit card bills..income tax debts etc. he has been living with his brother and he finally had enough and left the apt. an...
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allison
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1
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405
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Lmt, where are you?
(Preview)
((((((((((((((((((((((Lmt))))))))))))))))))))),
Where are you sweet friend? I miss seeing you!
Love and blessings to you and your family!
Live strong,
Karilynn & Pipers Kitty 
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Karilynn
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2
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323
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being good to myself
(Preview)
Today has been tough. Last nite I did a sleep study test. The paper work trigger the past for me. One question asked to underline words that describe yourself. Lazy, no good, deadbeat, on & on for almost a whole paragraph then the descriptions started getting better and more p...
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hmrnrnmm
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0
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240
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Leave the pieces when you go--long
(Preview)
Hi there everybody. I haven't been on in a few weeks. I used to get online at school and well it's closed for the summer, and I mistakenly thought I could handle alone for a few weeks. INSANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I thought things were going pretty good. I knew not great, but amazing when you aren't...
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hudsond
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3
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478
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Waiting or Holding Ourselves Back?
(Preview)
Thought I'd share our meeting topic last night: Waiting. Waiting can be a good thing in program, making wise choices when we are not angry and/or impulsive. Waiting on the other hand, well, you know, makes us feel like we are just sinking more into the quicksand.&nb...
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wallsal55
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2
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284
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Oh boy it's starting to get ugly around here
(Preview)
Hello ((((Everyone))))
I haven't talked lately about where I am or what I am doing so here it goes .... I moved back to the house 2 weeks ago, by choice but not for long. I need time to pack and sort, do repairs etc. I found chaos and mayhem. So here I am changing what I can. While I stay here I do...
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Jennifer
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6
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415
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last 12 hours have been rough
(Preview)
Last night I got into an aruement with my wife and it it hasn't ended yet. She went out last night and I was at home with our two kids. They really pushed me to the limits when it came to bed time and it took everything I had to stay cool. About 45 minutes after my eldest (2 1/2 years old) went to bed my youngest (1...
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iwishuheaven
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13
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493
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have you noticed a positive change around here????
(Preview)
I have been really busy with baaseball, kids, meetings etc and have only had time to get my online fix by reading and occasionally a quick reply. Today was the last day of school for the summer and I am so looking forward to being able to be a better participant here at MIP.
I just wanted to say that...
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confused
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4
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355
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Affirmation "I pledge Allegeiance"
(Preview)
Affirmations: ..I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE .. To all the things that are good about me.... And I shall from this day forward, No longer try to be everything to everybody. Nor will I be someone I'm not. I shall no longer use all my energies to fulfill the dreams of others while mine go unattended. I shall use my as...
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angel123
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2
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2287
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Happy Birthday Caroline
(Preview)
Today is my youngest granddaughter's first birthday, Caroline Olivia - I haven't seen her in over three months. Her mom, Ashley (our daughter) is the one that I saw last week in rehab. Caroline is staying with her other grandparents(Ashley's Mom & Step-Dad) who do no...
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Rita G
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4
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346
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Detachment - What???
(Preview)
Am a little bit, no a big bit confused here. Detachemnt to me means not diving a damn. What does it mean to you all. I can detach, shut down, not care...all of those things. I cannot care and detach at the same time.
Any thoughts??????
Ty all
lilms
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lilms
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7
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425
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ok so i'm sick, now what ?????
(Preview)
ok people i get it, i'm sick, but what now ??? see i know i'm sick i feel sick to the bottom of my stomach, and it hurts!!! it hurts so bad and i just want it to stop. so how do i do that ???
problem one i dont know whats wrong only that its very wrong and if you dont know what it is how do you fix it ??
problem two th...
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kellyjelly
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13
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828
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How do you know if you are doing better?
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
This is the question I asked myself today. I used to do better when my AW was not raging at me. Period. She starts raging and I flip out. Then everything gets me... work, the kids and their little tragedys, the guy driving like an idiot in front of me...&nb...
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rtexas
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5
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448
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AH refuses AA; how do I detach?
(Preview)
My AH says he doesn't need AA and that he "does nothing wrong". I begged and cried for him to change things. I told him he could drink all he wants as long as he's not mean. He says I am the one who is mean. He says all I want to do is change him. I said I don't like to be cut down when he's drunk and I damn sure don't li...
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Lindy
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10
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529
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thoink you and smoinks
(Preview)
I loved all your posts to me. Made me feel better. So please now all of you, get your tents and stuff and kids and dogs and whatever and come camp at Eden and have a pignic with me.
love,debilyn
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debilyn
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2
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351
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Still stuff left
(Preview)
Hello. guess it is my turn to share.
It is rough right now. Comes a point that a vacation is not a want but a need. I love it here, I love my life. Just need to have a day or two or three to wake up to go back to sleep again. Not feed someone as soon as my feet hit the floor.
Doing my best to get my budget goi...
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debilyn
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14
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655
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JOHN Please answer questions, thanks
(Preview)
Hi John,
I have a question for you as a matter of fact 2 or 3 .
Today when I was putting posts on the board, some how my name had a number added to it and couldn't get in. Somehow my password was changed too. Not sure how to get in touch with you. Could you please check into it for me.
Also I was in chat...
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d53sjurne
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2
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553
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blaming myself & feeling guilty
(Preview)
I noticed something about myself last nite in a meeting with the other caretakers of the elderly man I sit with. I tend to feel like when someone brings up something that is not being done by one of the other caretakers, I immediately think that they are talking about me. It looked like she was look...
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hmrnrnmm
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3
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571
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Update/Father's Day
(Preview)
All the stupid cards out there used to drive me absolutely insane. Now that I don't have to get them/ can't get them anymore, I almost miss it. I've done a lot of I dunno what to call it, discovering lately. Everything's been insane, and things have gotten really hard to deal with. Ecspecially being new o...
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Miranda
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1
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288
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My weakness prevailed
(Preview)
Dear A- ex
I’m sorry I called you, I tried and tried to be strong and my weakness prevailed. I hate myself for calling you, I hate so much now. Why couldn’t I have been stronger and said “you know what AA-X , what make you think I give a Sh*# about you” but no INSTEAD, I helpe...
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angelnomore
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4
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419
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New and confused
(Preview)
I am still new to al-anon and this time around I am really trying to work on me. I came to a few meetings at the end of last year but I did not stick to it. I think I came more for my A than for me. Now I am really ready to work on myself for me and me only. I am going to f2f meetings but there...
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LALA1
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4
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418
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Bad movie, lets change the channel
(Preview)
I made her choose, I did not make her choice! How can she continue to blame me for the terrible choices she made and the impact that they are still having on our entire family? Why can't she see the connection between her drinking and our failing marriage, her blackout...
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Keoki
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4
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422
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feeling resentment
(Preview)
I am getting ready to leave. I have been up since almost 8 am. I have feed all but 8 dogs, we have 29. My A is still in bed. I know she is awake. I still have to unload the truck from our sale saturday.
She has not drank since Saturday.
I am wondering why we buy groceries at all. My A has told a freind of o...
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hmrnrnmm
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4
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336
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When is it time???
(Preview)
Yesterday being father's day I conteplated calling my father. I went back and forth with it a few times. Asking myself when I was going to stop chasing the relationship I will never have with him. Does he after all the years of ignoring 2 of his 3 children deserve a phone call w...
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AlaMom
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6
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447
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Hello Again
(Preview)
Hello To All,
I am not a new member. In fact, I used to frequent this message board a few years back and I am so glad I have come back. I forgot what it feels like to read these messages and just keep an awareness of myself through your post's. To help if I can and to laugh is what...
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marchgrl
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5
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296
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i am not letting ANYONE "time"my recovery
(Preview)
i am not letting ANYONE "time" my recovery
it took a LONG time for me to get **this** sick....**this** messed up.....it took a long time and LOTS of trauma and RE-trauma for the *candle of hope* to damned near blow out for me.....
so it isn't gonna be overnight that i recover....
i have...
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rosie light shines
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6
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628
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my A is missing
(Preview)
I have not heard from him in over 24 hours. He was supposed to call last night. How do you get through a day without crying and feeling helpless and depressed? For all I know he's dead. When he does call and tells me he's fine, how do I not get mad at him for not calling? I wan...
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jacksmom
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6
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443
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dealing with difficult negative people?
(Preview)
ok I get the no gossip , no criticism, no sarcasm but what if everyone you come in contact with doesn't. I can already forcast what they are going to say. I have several in my life who are into gossip, criticism etc. I see this as negative. No I can not just avoid these people. I find myself with less an...
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hmrnrnmm
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5
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742
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hope for the future
(Preview)
hi everyone,
firstly thanks for all the replies to my first posting.
today has been an interesting day. AH went to his 3rd counselling session and came back reall happy. it seems it went well and he feels its going to do him good.
i personally was pleased because although he is doing lots of meetin...
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kellyjelly
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2
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335
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Marmare?
(Preview)
Mary,
Just wanted to see how you were doing! Haven't heard from you in a while. Starting to get worried here.
Much Love and prayers,
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Dolphin123
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0
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247
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step study board
(Preview)
The link in the announcement box on the alanon family groups page for the new step study board does not seem to work. TY. -- Edited by majakaty at 23:02, 2006-06-15
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majakaty
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2
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362
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Guess tonight just aint happening!
(Preview)
Being new to the concept that there is help available to those who by other than their choice are dealing with an A with substance issues. I now look for help.
I've spent the last 18 years of my life loving a beautiful woman whom has given me three beautiful children. Spent the last...
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Keoki
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7
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362
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well, he has done it again II-help! Am I crazy?
(Preview)
I posted earlier last night. I am still so upset. I wish I felt better. I have to work tonight or I would go to a meeting.
I talked to my roommate about the letter and showed it to her. She thinks he may be justified in his response.
That makes me feel even crazier. It was just an article!! Am I that scr...
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sarahlm
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4
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395
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hello
(Preview)
Hello out there I'm new here!!
I'm Evey and my A is my husband. Without a five page laundry list of crap he's done. Let me start with the last. He drank himself to a drunk of .5 and went into respiritory arrest. He was found along side the road, brought by ambulance to the hospital, and put on a ven...
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evey
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4
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513
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TOO FAR GONE
(Preview)
I know that I should not even be posting on this board because I do not want to have a negative effect on anyone. I know alot of people believe their story is hopeless, but mine is REALLY hopeless. Let me explain. I am a senior citizen. I have survived three generations of alcoh...
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Marlene
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10
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709
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aa widow needs words of wisdom
(Preview)
hi my name is kelly, or kellyjelly as you can see. this was chosen by me due to the extra weight i'm currently carrying as a direct result of comfort eating. my husband is nearly eight months in recovery and i am a aa widow. he is doing four meetings a week and has his bloody mobile cemented to his leg in case s...
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kellyjelly
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8
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1129
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hi guys !
(Preview)
hi guys , just discovered this part of the board ! been posting elsewhere on MIP . Great to see you all here .
I'm a long term Alanon member but consider myself still in the learning process , and don't really have just one A there are several situations that I've been using the programme...
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Vicky R
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4
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330
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A friend...
(Preview)
I came across this wonderful, anonymous quote, and thought I'd share it. Perhaps you have heard it; I had not.
"My friend knows the song in my heart, and sings it to me when my memory fails."
Diva
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Diva
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6
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463
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TY for the Dad's day wishes
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
Thanks to all who wished us Men folks a happy fathers day. I did have a good fathers day. I related the mess that was starting up on thursday night, but friday went better and we all had fun fishing and playing on the owners wave runner.
I WANT one of those! That t...
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rtexas
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5
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282
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Encouraging news for me...
(Preview)
I have learned not to hold my breath - so that said...
I've mentioned that my A 'husband' has attended tons of meetings over the last few days. His job didn't fire him - just mandated that he pass a urine test. He Passed!!!!
He sounds good, sounds excited and keeps mentioning hi...
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Akasha
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3
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316
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I can't live like this anymore
(Preview)
It was another rough weekend for me and my seven year old son. Here's what happened: it started on Friday night. While I took my little boy to the carnival that was in town, my AH was out at a campsite visiting his friends. He wasn't back when my son and I got home on Friday. He finally drove his drunk ass home...
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Lindy
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7
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496
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What do you tell them
(Preview)
This one has been a difficult one for me. What do you tell people that you haven't seen in a long time when they ask about your addict. Lots of them have no idea we are facing this rollercoaster in our lives. My first instinct is to tell them the truth but I usually lie and tell them he is d...
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Mobirdie
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6
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532
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New technique
(Preview)
I am no longer weaning off my A. Going cold turkey instead. I am so addicted, I am signing contracts with my friends, promising not to contact him at 24 hour intervals. The idea is I respect these people and want them to respect me so I will keep my promise!!
I state I will not contact him…and why. This i...
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Dog
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1
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396
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A going away poem from mac
(Preview)
One day at dawn
One day at dawn we walked along
My sleepy girl and I,
As the sun rose through the trees,
As the leaves moved in the breeze.
A treasure field gleamed drops of dew,
The yawning sky went baby blue,
A rabbit stayed to see us by
As a dove on a line lay just so high....
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mac57
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13
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1350
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THE BUZZARD, BAT AND BUMBLEBEE
(Preview)
BUZZARD
If you put a buzzard in a pen that is 6 feet by 8 feet and
is entirely open at the top, the bird, in spite of its
ability to fly, will be an absolute prisoner. The reason is that a buzzard
always begins a flight from the ground with a run of 10 to 12 feet.
Without space to run, as is its habit, it...
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Christy
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10
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502
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ok so you change, he doesnt - do you go back to old ways or go on?
(Preview)
I dont party nearly as much as my husband. We met during our party days. I stopped partying when we had our son 14 yrs ago. When I do have a few drinks it seems we get along alot better. Do I go back to drinking? or choose to go on w/resentment towards my husband? Sometimes I feel its best to go back to the old day...
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Barbara
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9
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525
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