Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

zed808 · zed808

I am new here and searching for support. My husband abuses to relieve a back injury that will always give him pain. I understand why he does this but it is still ruining our lives. We just recently had to refinance our home and almost lost our home due to his addiction. We live i...

rf · rf

Hi :) I'm new to the group. Is there a schedule of the topics for meetings? Tks, rf :)

angel123 · angel123

For every problem there's a solution-even if it's to live with the problem. People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing. Will power;You give God your will,He gives you his power. We can't help what anyone else thinks of us.It is eough that we are honest with ourselves. Forum Septemb...

mastiff · mastiff

Hi all, I've had a bit of a dillema going on in my head and wanted your es&h on it if you could. I guess I'll start at, my husband works 4 ten hour days in a town 4 hours away and stays in that town m-th. When he comes home for the weekend, needless to say, our time together is precious. ...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Group))) TGIF!!

Its been a long tiring week. It took me everything I had to make it into work this morning, not because I'm depressed just exhausted. Aside from work this week has been a peaceful week. Monday night the whole family went to an open meeti...

rtexas · rtexas

(((everyone))) I acturally sat down now that I can think with a clear head for the first time in several years, and asked myself... why am I here? I don't have a clear cut reason to be brutally honest. I really tried hard to find one. I love my wife, and I believe that under all the rage s...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"There is a formula here, and if it's not here, it's in the next book. (Believing) a formula for everything! My main character defect is believing my defect is not a defect." ---from an alanon tape. (It has taken me many years to reach this insight. And still...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"One of the Best Ways I can help other people.... is to encourage them to take better care of themselves...and to reward them when they do."

wallsal55 · wallsal55

I never could grasp gratitude, gratitude journals until I read Melody Beatties book on ''Gratitude". For me, it was her explanation to "keep track of what's right with this picture?" (instead of what's wrong !). Gets me back to ground level.

Anita · Anita

I did it...I gave my A an ultimatum. Me, or the booze. This Saturday we are going to sit down and hash this all out. I told him I'm tired of never going out to the movies on a Saturday night or going to hear a band because he is all tied up at home copping a buzz. Wish me luck!

Jennifer · Jennifer

Good Morning (((Everyone))) Amidst all the chaos at the moment LOL packing boxes everywhere, garbage, collections calling, giving up and letting go of all the ways I could possibly salvage this situation, I am sitting here this morning in my chair watching my puppy sleep on the floor next to me. He...

Dog · Dog

I’ve been writing / signing contracts with my friends each day this week – 24 hrs no contact with my A. It’s worked! But he called me mid-week. I maintained decent boundaries but after reflecting on the call, I decided it did me no good at all. Further, I think any contact with me at all – ANY contact...

TLC2 · TLC2

can anyone tell me anything they know about pregnant mom's smoking pot, and how it can or does affect the baby? My son's prego ex-g'friend appears to be smoking all the pot she can get her hands on, and I'm worried how it will affect my grandchild??!! Thanx, TLC

dori · dori

Hi, I cant get into the chat room.I know I havent broken any guidelines so what gives.. dori

itsgot2bgd · itsgot2bgd

HI all, Wow! The power of this program is starting to give me a much needed shot in the arm! I came back into the rooms (this board for starters) and got back into my literature this week, after being gone for almost 3 years. I made a huge step in admitting how out of control my life is right...

LALA1 · LALA1

I had posted about me thinking my A (husband) was cheating on me and tonight I found out he realloy was. I am so devastated. It was like when I thought something it wasn't as hard to deal with and now I have to face the reality that he is once again. He says he has talked to his sponsor abou...

sister3 · sister3

Hello, I am new here...actually new to really entertaining the idea of being the sister of an alcoholic, even though it has been evident for years. I am just really struggling with getting him help and trying to be strong and not enable him to get the help that he needs. I went to scho...

Lindy · Lindy

I am on the verge of just taking off to another country and leaving EVERYTHING behind. I'm so tired of everything and everyone around me. I have to deal with my AH and his nasty comments to me. I am having trouble with my seven year old son. He's ADHD and on Ritalin to try to control it. I think we found the rig...

kerry5 · kerry5

This came in my email thought you would like it. Think i posted it a long while back. Here it is Natural Highs Think about them one at a time BEFORE going on to the next one... 1. Falling in love. 2. Laughing so hard your face hurts. 3. A hot shower. 4. No lines at the superma...

peaceofmind · peaceofmind

Hi I am an adult child of a alcoholic. I grew up in a alcoholic home for most of life and my dad stopped drinking after coming to AA for the past 10 years. However, as I have grown and progressed in my life, I find my past experiences and background having a profound effect on my behaviour. Anger for eg. H...

dori · dori

Hi, I have been in alanon about 3 years now.I went though a period where I was working on some areas in my life and wasnt going to many meetings . Now I am ready to get back in and have done some meetings on line and have posted here. My dilema is that my ex a and his new gf he met at AA now I hear go...

hersh · hersh

Hi everyone... Thanks for this board. I have been saved by Alanon and the wisdom and love of other people in the program. I am fairly new. You know, I have worked the steps through AA, and am really trying to practice them in this program, and read up on codependency and Alanon lite...

nmike · nmike

Hi friends, I notice in reading many of the posts some of you have chosen absolutely no contact with your A's. No phone calls, no face to face visits. Even tho you have made a conscious choice for no contact, you still talk about missing your A's and resisting the temptation to call. Why do you chose no c...

nycbt · nycbt

Me and my friend were talking yesterday and the subject trust came up. We have issue trusting, both of our lives are going great, so why do we have problems trusting. Well my problem trusting my husband is because he is one of the a's in my life. He is going to aa, so he could go back to drinking all the time an...

kerry5 · kerry5

It amazes me lately my triggers. It takes a line in chat and a flood of memory comes without warining. Memories i wouldnt go to if a certain thing wasnt said. IT also amazes me the feelings that come with these memories. Every time this happens i so wish i could get my anger back. There...

Gailey · Gailey

Thank HP...I went to a meeting last night. It was on the 3rd step. There were alot of parents in that meeting and alot of stuff I needed to hear. I am pretty much able to detach this morning. Only by the Grace of HP and the Alanon program. I am kinda looking at it as a chance to let him suffer consequences and ge...

abbyal · abbyal

I am looking for someone with the REAL name of Sandy (not a nick name ) husb named Garry. If you could pm me I will explain why????? Louise

Belongtome · Belongtome

Well...thanks to Gailey, at least I'm working on it. She sent me a "sample" spreadsheet where she lists monthly expense, and the due date, date paid, etc. I just started filling it out, but also including the interest rate, and the balances for each, and the past due amount. I figured I...

Gailey · Gailey

I know that my HP has something better for me. I believe that our HP does have a plan for us. I can relate this to a spouse, bf or gf of an A. My problem comes in when I try to relate it to my child. As a spouse, bf or gf you can one day ,hopefully, have a better life without the A in your life. (I did) Ho...

Jennifer · Jennifer

hello ((Everyone)) When I said in my last post that things were getting ugly around here I grossly UNESTIMATED. Today has really been the topper for me and I need some serious advice and ESH. My AH called me at work and said he wanted to walk home with me. Sounded OK so I said sure. When he got there, he i...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, my AH boyfriend has been not drinking for four of five months now. He was in treatment for a while...went in by his own choice. He did have a lapse for a few days three weeks ago, and he and his drinking pals went out. Then the money ran out. We don't live together, and I detatched as best I coul...

DoN4me · DoN4me

I have had some time away from my son as I have posted before. Sometime with my animals and me and work. In that time that I had I got alot of time to reflect on me. Which has been a real eye opening experiance for me. I have worked on all my relationships with my family. I have even been working on my relation...

itsgot2bgd · itsgot2bgd

Hi all, Boy, I've just read some of the posts here and I have to say, coming to al-anon is like coming home -- to a more functional, loving home... a safe home, a comforting home... like running into your grandma's arms -- where you know it's all gonna be ok. I've been in and out of t...

debilyn · debilyn

Well he sends me a letter saying he does not want a divorce. So I just wrote one back saying well he better work hard on changing my mind. Told him I deserve respect. Plus I am tired of being a fool staying married to someone who makes it very apparent I am the last thing he thinks about. I need it to be over so...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

I haven't posted in a while, have been out of town a few weeks, but this post has been building for some time. I hope you don't mind my rambling share, it helps me to stay in what is real and stop putting things off as no big deal. I met my A at 18, we married at 25. I made the comment to him t...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

>>i thought this was a pretty cool thing on step eleven....i took parts of it, and i gave MY esh in the colored type It took me many years in Al-Anon to get to StepEleven, the "prayer and meditation" step. When Ifinally got there, after wrestling with Steps Fourthrough Ten, Ste...

hudsond · hudsond

Ok. I had a dream last night, that when I was awoken (is that a word) I thought oh my word. Thought I'd share it I was driving in my car after dropping my ah off at the mechanic's to drop off his truck. Then I decided he was probably hungry so I went to pick him up a pizza. Then in my rearview mirror and saw him...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Hello--Lately I've found myself into projection. Anytime my life hits a new growth spurt, I project. I can't do this; I'll be a failure; I'm going to bomb out; things like that. I talked with my sponsor and some program friends earlier today about projection and my stinkin' thinking. So I feel alot b...

lebe27 · lebe27

A started drinking again the day before yesterday. He only made it one week this time. This time excuse was guy he had given his old truck to and paid for his registration too boot didn't show to help him with some things around our house he was suppose to do as payment. The guy keeps ma...

shadow1 · shadow1

I just got a phone call from a friend. Her 14 year old daughter Amanda is undergoing testing for leukemia. Please say a prayer for her and her mother. They could use all the help they can get. Thanks Shadow

slkcma · slkcma

First I'd like to say that I hope you all find the peace you deserve! Peace and contentment is my goal. After all these years, I've finally realized that my surroundings and trying to change others around me isn't going to bring me that. I have alot of work to do within myself. I'll first mention...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have been working for 3 months now and so far the A has not conned me on any level out of money. Tonight I find out he made only a partial payment on the rent (he has done that for months I think) and we got a three day notice. The landlord is fed up with getting only partial payments and a song and dance (which t...

nycbt · nycbt

Since I started with Alanon my marriage to an a has gotten alot better. He bought me a flag ring no special reason. When I start we were having yelling matchs, i was staying at my parents house when he started to act up. I was taught how to put myself forward i am not perfect and i had a disagree yesterday howe...

Lindy · Lindy

My AH has money problems, mostly due to his drinking and gambling. He gets laid off from work and chooses to spend his time (and money) drinking and gambling. Last night he told me is trying to get a home equity type loan thru his union. He said he would use it to pay off his credit cards and remodel the bas...

Belongtome · Belongtome

Well....after getting all bent out of shape yesterday over my A's desire to put our money into his car instead of overdue bills....things just went downhill. The sale of the boat didn't go through, so there isn't enough money to worry about!!!! But, last night I had my weekly golf outing with daug...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there...to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but you lock eyes with them, you know that very moment that t...

Dog · Dog

I am new to Alanon... this week will be my f2f meeting, so I've been going about a month. I have a question for the oldtimers. I don't want to talk! It's not that I am shy. I am anything but shy, but so far, I have not had anything "authentic" to say during a meeting. I have chatted before the meetings, and been...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I cannot find a link to the pm box anywhere, maybe I'm just not seeing it. There is a message there that I want to reply to and darned if I can find my way there. TIA

dori · dori

Hi, I just went back and read morbies post on what addicts do and it was another reminder how blessed I am he is not in my life any more.It is so funny how some of us are blessed enough to get out of the relationship and we forget all the sleepless nights the cheating the lieing and the abuse and we tha...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Hello Group, Today is 30 days sober for my A. I can see the challenges he faced this month as well as myself. For me it was my insecurity, my anger, my fear. The behaviors are still there for the A. The anger and rages are not as bad. He has been able to control himself in s...

mandalynn38 · mandalynn38

I am having a hard day today. My A boyfriend went into a rage on Friday with that I have not seen him since Sunday morning. He came to my house on Saturday night late and he spent the night.. I dropped him off back to his house on sunday. I have not seen him or spoke to him since. My choice, because I have t...

Keoki · Keoki

Finally made it to a al-anon mtg. lotsa nice folks with lotsa encouragements! I plan on it being a weekly stop. Found the books that I've been told about too. I've been told that the alateen in my area will be starting up again so that the kids will have the help that they need to...

heartless39470 · heartless39470

I never thought my life would end up like it is. I always dreamed of being happily married with the house white picket fence, & the kids. Needless to say it didn't end up like that. I met my husband in highschool. I loved him unconditionally. As teenagers we did our share of partying. I never thought h...

Belongtome · Belongtome

I'm losing it...and I'd been doing so well. I guess when things are going okay, I think I don't have to work my program...especially the "being good to myself" part, and then it all slides downhill. I looked back over my own posts, and it seems like I have this recording that is broken...isn't t...

angel123 · angel123

Detachment means not worrying,not judging and not rescuing. Hope ever tells us tomarrow will be better. If we share another's burden,both of us will walk straighter. Just for today I will treat myself gently and nuture the child within. Losers say"I can't"winners say,"I'll t...

Lindy · Lindy

Just when I start to kind of pull myself together something my AH does comes back to bring me back down. I was starting to feel a little better today after the bad weekend I had. I checked my checking account on-line just now and found four $29 overdraft charges on my account. My money is separate from my...

Gailey · Gailey

Lately I have been so disorganized. My desk at work seems to always be a mess. I spend too much time on this board and do not seem to get things done the way I used to. I think I am becoming addicted to MIP. At home I do not get things done unless I am "under the gun" so to speak. I am last minute with everything. It...

April306 · April306

I'm sorry to say I rarely post here but do read all of your thoughts and experiences and they help me so much. I do go to alanon meetings every week also and am doing my best to work the program and feel better. However, for the past month or so I have been crying every day, even at work and even in...

serendipity · serendipity

i want to talk to my ah and tell him that insted of doing whatever it is he is doing he should be with his kids. he had a whole day that he didn't work and he never even called to ask if he could be with our 3 year old. i bet it never even occured to him. i know it didn't. or he sees his son from a prevoius marria...

iwishuheaven · iwishuheaven

I am quite new to Al-Alon and never been to a meeting yet. I ahve a few questions about them I am hoping ypou can answer. 1. Are they for anyone who suffers form A in thier family? i.e. ACoA and spouses, etc... 2. Does it matter where you go I noticed that all the one in my area have differnt names, does t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	new and scared (Preview) I am new here and searching for support. My husband abuses to relieve a back injury that will always give him pain. I understand why he does this but it is still ruining our lives. We just recently had to refinance our home and almost lost our home due to his addiction. We live i...	zed808	4	503	Jun 24, 2006 by just me
	Topics for Meetings (Preview) Hi :) I'm new to the group. Is there a schedule of the topics for meetings? Tks, rf :)	rf	4	648	Jun 24, 2006 by Ria
	Food for thought (Preview) For every problem there's a solution-even if it's to live with the problem. People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing. Will power;You give God your will,He gives you his power. We can't help what anyone else thinks of us.It is eough that we are honest with ourselves. Forum Septemb...	angel123	1	372	Jun 24, 2006 by abbyal
	jealous of his sponsees? (Preview) Hi all, I've had a bit of a dillema going on in my head and wanted your es&h on it if you could. I guess I'll start at, my husband works 4 ten hour days in a town 4 hours away and stays in that town m-th. When he comes home for the weekend, needless to say, our time together is precious. ...	mastiff	8	632	Jun 24, 2006 by abbyal
	Making progress and not to worried about perfection (Preview) (((Hello Group))) TGIF!! Its been a long tiring week. It took me everything I had to make it into work this morning, not because I'm depressed just exhausted. Aside from work this week has been a peaceful week. Monday night the whole family went to an open meeti...	twinmom2	4	345	Jun 24, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Why do I stay? (Preview) (((everyone))) I acturally sat down now that I can think with a clear head for the first time in several years, and asked myself... why am I here? I don't have a clear cut reason to be brutally honest. I really tried hard to find one. I love my wife, and I believe that under all the rage s...	rtexas	15	754	Jun 24, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Quote from engineer on Step 6 (Preview) "There is a formula here, and if it's not here, it's in the next book. (Believing) a formula for everything! My main character defect is believing my defect is not a defect." ---from an alanon tape. (It has taken me many years to reach this insight. And still...	wallsal55	0	321	Jun 24, 2006 by wallsal55
	Quote (Preview) "One of the Best Ways I can help other people.... is to encourage them to take better care of themselves...and to reward them when they do."	wallsal55	0	281	Jun 24, 2006 by wallsal55
	Gratitude for me (grasping it!) (Preview) I never could grasp gratitude, gratitude journals until I read Melody Beatties book on ''Gratitude". For me, it was her explanation to "keep track of what's right with this picture?" (instead of what's wrong !). Gets me back to ground level.	wallsal55	0	320	Jun 24, 2006 by wallsal55
	I did it... (Preview) I did it...I gave my A an ultimatum. Me, or the booze. This Saturday we are going to sit down and hash this all out. I told him I'm tired of never going out to the movies on a Saturday night or going to hear a band because he is all tied up at home copping a buzz. Wish me luck!	Anita	9	475	Jun 24, 2006 by Diva
	Impatience on trust (Preview) Good Morning (((Everyone))) Amidst all the chaos at the moment LOL packing boxes everywhere, garbage, collections calling, giving up and letting go of all the ways I could possibly salvage this situation, I am sitting here this morning in my chair watching my puppy sleep on the floor next to me. He...	Jennifer	1	386	Jun 24, 2006 by rtexas
	The Next Challenge and a question (Preview) I’ve been writing / signing contracts with my friends each day this week – 24 hrs no contact with my A. It’s worked! But he called me mid-week. I maintained decent boundaries but after reflecting on the call, I decided it did me no good at all. Further, I think any contact with me at all – ANY contact...	Dog	1	338	Jun 24, 2006 by just me
	pregnant mom's smoking pot (Preview) can anyone tell me anything they know about pregnant mom's smoking pot, and how it can or does affect the baby? My son's prego ex-g'friend appears to be smoking all the pot she can get her hands on, and I'm worried how it will affect my grandchild??!! Thanx, TLC	TLC2	4	468	Jun 24, 2006 by TLC2
	chat room (Preview) Hi, I cant get into the chat room.I know I havent broken any guidelines so what gives.. dori	dori	2	321	Jun 24, 2006 by Ria
	took a step today (Preview) HI all, Wow! The power of this program is starting to give me a much needed shot in the arm! I came back into the rooms (this board for starters) and got back into my literature this week, after being gone for almost 3 years. I made a huge step in admitting how out of control my life is right...	itsgot2bgd	1	470	Jun 23, 2006 by Ria
	Totally Devastated (Preview) I had posted about me thinking my A (husband) was cheating on me and tonight I found out he realloy was. I am so devastated. It was like when I thought something it wasn't as hard to deal with and now I have to face the reality that he is once again. He says he has talked to his sponsor abou...	LALA1	12	588	Jun 23, 2006 by debilyn
	my brother (Preview) Hello, I am new here...actually new to really entertaining the idea of being the sister of an alcoholic, even though it has been evident for years. I am just really struggling with getting him help and trying to be strong and not enable him to get the help that he needs. I went to scho...	sister3	6	443	Jun 23, 2006 by sister3
	I feel like I'm going crazy (Preview) I am on the verge of just taking off to another country and leaving EVERYTHING behind. I'm so tired of everything and everyone around me. I have to deal with my AH and his nasty comments to me. I am having trouble with my seven year old son. He's ADHD and on Ritalin to try to control it. I think we found the rig...	Lindy	6	538	Jun 23, 2006 by Jill
	Natural Highs (Preview) This came in my email thought you would like it. Think i posted it a long while back. Here it is *Natural Highs* Think about them one at a time BEFORE going on to the next one... *1. Falling in love. 2. Laughing so hard your face hurts. 3. A hot shower. 4. No lines at the superma...*	kerry5	3	351	Jun 23, 2006 by kerry5
	New here (Preview) Hi I am an adult child of a alcoholic. I grew up in a alcoholic home for most of life and my dad stopped drinking after coming to AA for the past 10 years. However, as I have grown and progressed in my life, I find my past experiences and background having a profound effect on my behaviour. Anger for eg. H...	peaceofmind	6	384	Jun 23, 2006 by Jennifer
	isolation-any advice (Preview) Hi, I have been in alanon about 3 years now.I went though a period where I was working on some areas in my life and wasnt going to many meetings . Now I am ready to get back in and have done some meetings on line and have posted here. My dilema is that my ex a and his new gf he met at AA now I hear go...	dori	3	560	Jun 23, 2006 by dori
	Confused emotionally! (Preview) Hi everyone... Thanks for this board. I have been saved by Alanon and the wisdom and love of other people in the program. I am fairly new. You know, I have worked the steps through AA, and am really trying to practice them in this program, and read up on codependency and Alanon lite...	hersh	4	332	Jun 23, 2006 by Tammy
	Why no contact??? (Preview) Hi friends, I notice in reading many of the posts some of you have chosen absolutely no contact with your A's. No phone calls, no face to face visits. Even tho you have made a conscious choice for no contact, you still talk about missing your A's and resisting the temptation to call. Why do you chose no c...	nmike	3	898	Jun 23, 2006 by canadianguy
	trust (Preview) Me and my friend were talking yesterday and the subject trust came up. We have issue trusting, both of our lives are going great, so why do we have problems trusting. Well my problem trusting my husband is because he is one of the a's in my life. He is going to aa, so he could go back to drinking all the time an...	nycbt	2	356	Jun 23, 2006 by annah
	Hp tests...lessons??? (Preview) It amazes me lately my triggers. It takes a line in chat and a flood of memory comes without warining. Memories i wouldnt go to if a certain thing wasnt said. IT also amazes me the feelings that come with these memories. Every time this happens i so wish i could get my anger back. There...	kerry5	4	409	Jun 23, 2006 by Rita G
	son got arrested last night (Preview) Thank HP...I went to a meeting last night. It was on the 3rd step. There were alot of parents in that meeting and alot of stuff I needed to hear. I am pretty much able to detach this morning. Only by the Grace of HP and the Alanon program. I am kinda looking at it as a chance to let him suffer consequences and ge...	Gailey	3	405	Jun 23, 2006 by tea2
	loooking for ?????? (Preview) I am looking for someone with the REAL name of Sandy (not a nick name ) husb named Garry. If you could pm me I will explain why????? Louise	abbyal	1	383	Jun 23, 2006 by dori
	I Know What I owe (Preview) Well...thanks to Gailey, at least I'm working on it. She sent me a "sample" spreadsheet where she lists monthly expense, and the due date, date paid, etc. I just started filling it out, but also including the interest rate, and the balances for each, and the past due amount. I figured I...	Belongtome	4	585	Jun 23, 2006 by Belongtome
	I don't understand this concept (Preview) I know that my HP has something better for me. I believe that our HP does have a plan for us. I can relate this to a spouse, bf or gf of an A. My problem comes in when I try to relate it to my child. As a spouse, bf or gf you can one day ,hopefully, have a better life without the A in your life. (I did) Ho...	Gailey	2	421	Jun 23, 2006 by Rita G
	I need some serious ESH (Preview) hello ((Everyone)) When I said in my last post that things were getting ugly around here I grossly UNESTIMATED. Today has really been the topper for me and I need some serious advice and ESH. My AH called me at work and said he wanted to walk home with me. Sounded OK so I said sure. When he got there, he i...	Jennifer	6	376	Jun 23, 2006 by iwishuheaven
	he's not drinking today...why am I so guilty? (Preview) Hi everyone, my AH boyfriend has been not drinking for four of five months now. He was in treatment for a while...went in by his own choice. He did have a lapse for a few days three weeks ago, and he and his drinking pals went out. Then the money ran out. We don't live together, and I detatched as best I coul...	annmarie	5	324	Jun 23, 2006 by annmarie
	Gaining a new perspective (Preview) I have had some time away from my son as I have posted before. Sometime with my animals and me and work. In that time that I had I got alot of time to reflect on me. Which has been a real eye opening experiance for me. I have worked on all my relationships with my family. I have even been working on my relation...	DoN4me	2	308	Jun 23, 2006 by nycbt
	It's like coming home (Preview) Hi all, Boy, I've just read some of the posts here and I have to say, coming to al-anon is like coming home -- to a more functional, loving home... a safe home, a comforting home... like running into your grandma's arms -- where you know it's all gonna be ok. I've been in and out of t...	itsgot2bgd	4	322	Jun 22, 2006 by itsgot2bgd
	update on jailbird (Preview) Well he sends me a letter saying he does not want a divorce. So I just wrote one back saying well he better work hard on changing my mind. Told him I deserve respect. Plus I am tired of being a fool staying married to someone who makes it very apparent I am the last thing he thinks about. I need it to be over so...	debilyn	7	386	Jun 22, 2006 by Lunamoth
	Facing my bridge (Preview) I haven't posted in a while, have been out of town a few weeks, but this post has been building for some time. I hope you don't mind my rambling share, it helps me to stay in what is real and stop putting things off as no big deal. I met my A at 18, we married at 25. I made the comment to him t...	Lunamoth	8	505	Jun 22, 2006 by Jennifer
	what do ya'll think about step eleven?? (Preview) >>i thought this was a pretty cool thing on step eleven....i took parts of it, and i gave MY esh in the colored type It took me many years in Al-Anon to get to StepEleven, the "prayer and meditation" step. When Ifinally got there, after wrestling with Steps Fourthrough Ten, Ste...	rosie light shines	2	465	Jun 22, 2006 by jrtjosey
	Dream (Preview) Ok. I had a dream last night, that when I was awoken (is that a word) I thought oh my word. Thought I'd share it I was driving in my car after dropping my ah off at the mechanic's to drop off his truck. Then I decided he was probably hungry so I went to pick him up a pizza. Then in my rearview mirror and saw him...	hudsond	3	377	Jun 22, 2006 by Jennifer
	Projection E/S/H (Preview) Hello--Lately I've found myself into projection. Anytime my life hits a new growth spurt, I project. I can't do this; I'll be a failure; I'm going to bomb out; things like that. I talked with my sponsor and some program friends earlier today about projection and my stinkin' thinking. So I feel alot b...	Tiger2006	6	2107	Jun 22, 2006 by abbyal
	Some Progress (Preview) A started drinking again the day before yesterday. He only made it one week this time. This time excuse was guy he had given his old truck to and paid for his registration too boot didn't show to help him with some things around our house he was suppose to do as payment. The guy keeps ma...	lebe27	6	325	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Prayers needed please (Preview) I just got a phone call from a friend. Her 14 year old daughter Amanda is undergoing testing for leukemia. Please say a prayer for her and her mother. They could use all the help they can get. Thanks Shadow	shadow1	7	388	Jun 22, 2006 by aunitedway
	Hi all, I'm new here (Preview) First I'd like to say that I hope you all find the peace you deserve! Peace and contentment is my goal. After all these years, I've finally realized that my surroundings and trying to change others around me isn't going to bring me that. I have alot of work to do within myself. I'll first mention...	slkcma	5	437	Jun 22, 2006 by slkcma
	when everything is a lie (Preview) I have been working for 3 months now and so far the A has not conned me on any level out of money. Tonight I find out he made only a partial payment on the rent (he has done that for months I think) and we got a three day notice. The landlord is fed up with getting only partial payments and a song and dance (which t...	maresie2	2	472	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	a ring (Preview) Since I started with Alanon my marriage to an a has gotten alot better. He bought me a flag ring no special reason. When I start we were having yelling matchs, i was staying at my parents house when he started to act up. I was taught how to put myself forward i am not perfect and i had a disagree yesterday howe...	nycbt	4	369	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Caught AH trying to con me again (Preview) My AH has money problems, mostly due to his drinking and gambling. He gets laid off from work and chooses to spend his time (and money) drinking and gambling. Last night he told me is trying to get a home equity type loan thru his union. He said he would use it to pay off his credit cards and remodel the bas...	Lindy	4	347	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Insult to Injury (Preview) Well....after getting all bent out of shape yesterday over my A's desire to put our money into his car instead of overdue bills....things just went downhill. The sale of the boat didn't go through, so there isn't enough money to worry about!!!! But, last night I had my weekly golf outing with daug...	Belongtome	6	399	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Things Happen for a Reason (Preview) Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there...to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but you lock eyes with them, you know that very moment that t...	Mobirdie	4	526	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Newcomers speaking up in meetings (Preview) I am new to Alanon... this week will be my f2f meeting, so I've been going about a month. I have a question for the oldtimers. I don't want to talk! It's not that I am shy. I am anything but shy, but so far, I have not had anything "authentic" to say during a meeting. I have chatted before the meetings, and been...	Dog	12	611	Jun 22, 2006 by Tiger2006
	How do I get to my pm box (Preview) I cannot find a link to the pm box anywhere, maybe I'm just not seeing it. There is a message there that I want to reply to and darned if I can find my way there. TIA	Mobirdie	2	353	Jun 22, 2006 by Mobirdie
	what addicts do (Preview) Hi, I just went back and read morbies post on what addicts do and it was another reminder how blessed I am he is not in my life any more.It is so funny how some of us are blessed enough to get out of the relationship and we forget all the sleepless nights the cheating the lieing and the abuse and we tha...	dori	3	482	Jun 22, 2006 by Mobirdie
	A maybe dry, but behaviors still there (Preview) Hello Group, Today is 30 days sober for my A. I can see the challenges he faced this month as well as myself. For me it was my insecurity, my anger, my fear. The behaviors are still there for the A. The anger and rages are not as bad. He has been able to control himself in s...	twinmom2	6	415	Jun 22, 2006 by annmarie
	Missing the A (Preview) I am having a hard day today. My A boyfriend went into a rage on Friday with that I have not seen him since Sunday morning. He came to my house on Saturday night late and he spent the night.. I dropped him off back to his house on sunday. I have not seen him or spoke to him since. My choice, because I have t...	mandalynn38	6	517	Jun 22, 2006 by nycbt
	first f2f (Preview) Finally made it to a al-anon mtg. lotsa nice folks with lotsa encouragements! I plan on it being a weekly stop. Found the books that I've been told about too. I've been told that the alateen in my area will be starting up again so that the kids will have the help that they need to...	Keoki	3	398	Jun 22, 2006 by nycbt
	My Life (Preview) I never thought my life would end up like it is. I always dreamed of being happily married with the house white picket fence, & the kids. Needless to say it didn't end up like that. I met my husband in highschool. I loved him unconditionally. As teenagers we did our share of partying. I never thought h...	heartless39470	5	395	Jun 22, 2006 by iwishuheaven
	Help I'm losing it again (Preview) I'm losing it...and I'd been doing so well. I guess when things are going okay, I think I don't have to work my program...especially the "being good to myself" part, and then it all slides downhill. I looked back over my own posts, and it seems like I have this recording that is broken...isn't t...	Belongtome	10	609	Jun 22, 2006 by Belongtome
	Reflections (Preview) Detachment means not worrying,not judging and not rescuing. Hope ever tells us tomarrow will be better. If we share another's burden,both of us will walk straighter. Just for today I will treat myself gently and nuture the child within. Losers say"I can't"winners say,"I'll t...	angel123	0	260	Jun 22, 2006 by angel123
	AH is dragging me down; nickel and diming me to death (Preview) Just when I start to kind of pull myself together something my AH does comes back to bring me back down. I was starting to feel a little better today after the bad weekend I had. I checked my checking account on-line just now and found four $29 overdraft charges on my account. My money is separate from my...	Lindy	4	1675	Jun 22, 2006 by kitty
	disorganized and unmotivated!!! (Preview) Lately I have been so disorganized. My desk at work seems to always be a mess. I spend too much time on this board and do not seem to get things done the way I used to. I think I am becoming addicted to MIP. At home I do not get things done unless I am "under the gun" so to speak. I am last minute with everything. It...	Gailey	6	522	Jun 22, 2006 by kitty
	Safe in Prison??? (Preview) I'm sorry to say I rarely post here but do read all of your thoughts and experiences and they help me so much. I do go to alanon meetings every week also and am doing my best to work the program and feel better. However, for the past month or so I have been crying every day, even at work and even in...	April306	9	556	Jun 22, 2006 by sarahlm
	my motives (Preview) i want to talk to my ah and tell him that insted of doing whatever it is he is doing he should be with his kids. he had a whole day that he didn't work and he never even called to ask if he could be with our 3 year old. i bet it never even occured to him. i know it didn't. or he sees his son from a prevoius marria...	serendipity	1	434	Jun 21, 2006 by tiredtonite
	Al-Anon meetings? (Preview) I am quite new to Al-Alon and never been to a meeting yet. I ahve a few questions about them I am hoping ypou can answer. 1. Are they for anyone who suffers form A in thier family? i.e. ACoA and spouses, etc... 2. Does it matter where you go I noticed that all the one in my area have differnt names, does t...	iwishuheaven	9	679	Jun 21, 2006 by nycbt
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.